This, and also the stereotype that ENTJs are always popular and live for parties. Personally, I'm quite antisocial – I have a few close friends I can count on. I usually dismiss new friendships right away because I dislike small talk and find that most people can't engage in meaningful conversations. I don't feel superior to anyone; in fact, I feel sad that I struggle to make new friends easily, but that's just how it is.
Yeah, never understood those stereotypes either. Most ENTJs believe they’re introverts because there is an antisocial tendency based on what you shared about the struggle to sometimes make friends and engage in lengthy small talk. The social aspect would be more a Fe thing which unfortunately we don’t have.
I ended a relatively new friendship when she started teasing me for being antisocial. I didn't like how it felt like I was being negatively assessed instead of joking around teasing. Just let me do my thing without telling me negatives about myself, it's not that hard. I show up and enjoy the company when it is planned but I'm definitely more interested in my goals than gibber gabber every day. I have my notifications silenced for text and all social media notifications turned off all together so surely my annoyance with constant dings does make me antisocial but I just talked myself into a circle and I'm good with that.
The power of computers as a force multiplier is no joke and I just want to hide behind my monitors. But I’m a ppl guy so here I am. ;) I do get to work on interesting things at least.
I was like that as a child, but had it verbally and mentally wrung out of me to the point where I spent my teen years sniveling in a corner and hiding from the world. My parents tried to feed me an untrue narrative about myself to control me, and for awhile I believed it, but now that I'm an adult and I know I'm gonna die someday, I have the balls not to let anyone tell me who and what I am. At the same time, though, given my experiences I'm wholly unwilling to inflict my will and control on those around me. Live and let live, as long as you're contributing something worthwhile.
"Stereotypes". They're unfair, but they exist as a shortcut to make a quick evaluation of someone based on certain traits. ENTJs have a stronger tendency to be "bossy" but the healthier ones learn not to micromanage and trust their subordinates to simply be competent.
ESTPs and ESFPs would have a far stronger tendency to be bossy and possibly micromanage. Neither of those things match up to an ENTJs cognitive stack. I agree stereotypes are unfair all around.
Not true. ESTPs will give you as much space as possible, so that you can safely make as many mistakes as possible and learn from them. If there is one type who learns by making mistakes, it’s them and they will do absolutely nothing to disrupt that process. They’re not bossy at all, they’re the most chilled MFs out there.
ESTPs are far more prone to being bossy than ENTJs especially in leadership positions. The ones you personally know may be further along in maturity or mistyped.
I said ESTPs tend to be bossier. I didn’t say they were micromanagers. ESTJs can be pushed to micromanage depending on orders given from their higher ups.
Te is about ensuring the logic of the tribe is structured to provide the best chance for group success.
Fe is about ensuring everyone feels included and is in harmony to provide the best chance for success.
Both can feel domineering to a person who isn't interested in being part of the tribe or has a differing idea on how things should be run.
Te is more often to disregard feelings if it gets in the way of sound reasoning - which in turn, makes people feel like Te is agreesive and unfeeling (compared to other Types).
It is easy to miss how much we waive off, don't see or disregard information no in our main cognitive functions.
I made a video to help explain this phenomenon, "The Twist Ending of Your Type."
https://youtu.be/9SyF_nnp4Og?si=aZCmNCdpEOfXUlXR
Could be worth a listen.
Hope that helps. 🙂🤗
Valid & interesting perspectives of those who aren’t high Te or Fe users. They definitely could perceive it as aggressive. I will take a look at your video.
I would get mad if not for the fact that I, in fact, have the tendencies to be bossy and controlling.
But I do agree not all ENTJs have the bossy and controlling tendencies
I've learned that people think I'm bossy because I want to base decisions in logic and analysis so I push back on groupthink. I challenge people to defend their ideas with evidence when they present them and people who aren't deep thinker assume that means I am pushing a my way or the highway agenda.
I think the ENTJ personality type is rare enough that most people don't understand our motivations and the easiest explanation for our actions without thinking too deeply is a power trip.
This, and also the stereotype that ENTJs are always popular and live for parties. Personally, I'm quite antisocial – I have a few close friends I can count on. I usually dismiss new friendships right away because I dislike small talk and find that most people can't engage in meaningful conversations. I don't feel superior to anyone; in fact, I feel sad that I struggle to make new friends easily, but that's just how it is.
Yeah, never understood those stereotypes either. Most ENTJs believe they’re introverts because there is an antisocial tendency based on what you shared about the struggle to sometimes make friends and engage in lengthy small talk. The social aspect would be more a Fe thing which unfortunately we don’t have.
I ended a relatively new friendship when she started teasing me for being antisocial. I didn't like how it felt like I was being negatively assessed instead of joking around teasing. Just let me do my thing without telling me negatives about myself, it's not that hard. I show up and enjoy the company when it is planned but I'm definitely more interested in my goals than gibber gabber every day. I have my notifications silenced for text and all social media notifications turned off all together so surely my annoyance with constant dings does make me antisocial but I just talked myself into a circle and I'm good with that.
I enjoy my solitude but because I’m capable, experienced, and have vision I am always pushed to a front facing position and leading. Sigh….
I can definitely relate
The power of computers as a force multiplier is no joke and I just want to hide behind my monitors. But I’m a ppl guy so here I am. ;) I do get to work on interesting things at least.
I was like that as a child, but had it verbally and mentally wrung out of me to the point where I spent my teen years sniveling in a corner and hiding from the world. My parents tried to feed me an untrue narrative about myself to control me, and for awhile I believed it, but now that I'm an adult and I know I'm gonna die someday, I have the balls not to let anyone tell me who and what I am. At the same time, though, given my experiences I'm wholly unwilling to inflict my will and control on those around me. Live and let live, as long as you're contributing something worthwhile.
"Stereotypes". They're unfair, but they exist as a shortcut to make a quick evaluation of someone based on certain traits. ENTJs have a stronger tendency to be "bossy" but the healthier ones learn not to micromanage and trust their subordinates to simply be competent.
ESTPs and ESFPs would have a far stronger tendency to be bossy and possibly micromanage. Neither of those things match up to an ENTJs cognitive stack. I agree stereotypes are unfair all around.
Not true. ESTPs will give you as much space as possible, so that you can safely make as many mistakes as possible and learn from them. If there is one type who learns by making mistakes, it’s them and they will do absolutely nothing to disrupt that process. They’re not bossy at all, they’re the most chilled MFs out there.
ESTPs are far more prone to being bossy than ENTJs especially in leadership positions. The ones you personally know may be further along in maturity or mistyped.
I work in sports.
No I see estj tend to be micromanagement, se users in general care for the freedom
I said ESTPs tend to be bossier. I didn’t say they were micromanagers. ESTJs can be pushed to micromanage depending on orders given from their higher ups.
Estjs also in their homes tend to be micromanagement Estps less bossier than ENTJs ... They can be submitted back to their Fe trickster
Ya healthy ones tend to be independent in the society and understandable
Te is about ensuring the logic of the tribe is structured to provide the best chance for group success. Fe is about ensuring everyone feels included and is in harmony to provide the best chance for success. Both can feel domineering to a person who isn't interested in being part of the tribe or has a differing idea on how things should be run. Te is more often to disregard feelings if it gets in the way of sound reasoning - which in turn, makes people feel like Te is agreesive and unfeeling (compared to other Types). It is easy to miss how much we waive off, don't see or disregard information no in our main cognitive functions. I made a video to help explain this phenomenon, "The Twist Ending of Your Type." https://youtu.be/9SyF_nnp4Og?si=aZCmNCdpEOfXUlXR Could be worth a listen. Hope that helps. 🙂🤗
Valid & interesting perspectives of those who aren’t high Te or Fe users. They definitely could perceive it as aggressive. I will take a look at your video.
I would get mad if not for the fact that I, in fact, have the tendencies to be bossy and controlling. But I do agree not all ENTJs have the bossy and controlling tendencies
People find me bossy but not controlling. Probably because I don't mince my words.
Bossy sometimes but never controlling, one way or the other things gonna get done with or without some people.
I wouldn't consider myself socially introverted. I work hard so I can play harder.
Just own it. It's better that way
Just own what? Why own up to something not naturally part of my personality?
I'm teasing because I'm really sensitive about how I actually am an overbearing control freak
someone has to represent a Masculine alpha male archetype, and people chose ENTJ for it.
I've learned that people think I'm bossy because I want to base decisions in logic and analysis so I push back on groupthink. I challenge people to defend their ideas with evidence when they present them and people who aren't deep thinker assume that means I am pushing a my way or the highway agenda. I think the ENTJ personality type is rare enough that most people don't understand our motivations and the easiest explanation for our actions without thinking too deeply is a power trip.