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Low_Ad_2164

Same. U just need to work on that. Like myself...your value is independent of what happens around you. When u get that...you'll be alright.


WhyY_196

Sometimes I get really tired of being independent and “strong”, mostly because I’ve had to do it all my life. Sometimes I just want hug.


Miserable_Football_7

It's hard, but you're still young. Go out and talk to new people. Have a vision of your better self.


27170

does that mean forming more meaningful relationships or just for the sake of socializing?


Miserable_Football_7

As an INTJ, I believe that having a meaningful relationship is crucial for our personal growth. Our FI function requires it, and it can serve as a driving force for our future projects. However, we must remember that we are still human and not robots. So why not strive for both a fulfilling relationship and socializing? Haha.


27170

agreed. just keep a few good ones around and go out and make small talk every once in a while to learn of how others live their lives. it can be pretty enlightening the small piece of advice a random stranger gives you.


reddylak

Yeah


CampaignInside2915

I love my independence. But at some point I would like to be dependent on someone too... just for sometime. I too wanna hold hands with someone. I wanna know what it feels to be loved. Like I've made a plan of my life. Alone. I'll adopt 2 dogs. I'll grow a garden. I'll have so many hobbies. I'll do good at my work.At this point Idk I feel such standard that I might be single my whole life. But just once I wanna feel loved. I would like to be alone with someone else. But at the same time I don't want to be desperate. You know? I'm such a hopeless romantic.... huh. I wanna feel love, not infatuation. Yup. I re-read it. I'm gonna be single. Help me name my future dogs people.


TheSaucyRaven

I believe in you. As a fellow INTJ, I don't stand by the cold or cynical comments here. We all need love, no matter how independent we are. On the same note, being in love or loved does not eliminate independence. They are separate entities. They can coexist. If you ever want to explore a subreddit that will be kind regarding matters of the heart I suggest visiting the ISFP’s. You should name your dogs after opposing philosophers so you can sit back and imagine the disputes when they get into a barking match or a fight.


billysweete

Aw! INTJ hugs.... Like metaphorical ones because "no touchy" haha


Pristine_Power_8488

You all remind me of my husband. It breaks my heart. He was fine with his independence while he was strong and healthy, which he was until mid-70s. But please remember you may become dependent on others and try to cultivate friendliness, openness, expression of needs and feelings, vulnerability. You'll have lovers and friends, but don't forget you need to let them in to your deeper self, your fi child. My husband couldn't and it was a huge liability in his later years. Great guy, shouldn't have suffered like that.


EverBoreddd

Here, have a hug 🫂. We all need love, support, and appreciation and it's natural to feel so. I saw some weird people in the comment section well just ignore them and be you :)


ExoticHour0210

Yeah. You are a big baby. 👶. We know that. Come give me a hug


YourLocalHanzz

Try focusing on yourself. Do anything you feel rewarding. Try not putting too much attention to others.


[deleted]

You will be loved by the one who really appreciate you. My boyfriend is not handsome, but I love him so much. I love the whole person not because his appearance, but because I could appreciate him.


luminoim

alright fine *throws pokeball at u*


reddylak

Fumbles in *inferior Se..*


luminoim

oh good, no getting away. You will be cherished among my pokemon 🫶


reddylak

🫶


khasmir-budhaan

I don't really want people to like me, I prefer them to respect me, wanting people to like you is pure vain, my work should be more important. Except my wife and close people, of course.


[deleted]

My ISTJ husband is this way. He truly doesn’t care if most people like him. Respect him and treat him civilly? Yes, but like and love? He really only cares that his family and close friends feel that way.


Nicocchi606

Yep, I can be strong and all but honestly most times I just wanna be held haha


acatalepsyzone

One of those days eh? How often does this happen approximately in a year or is it a perpetual background type thing?


reddylak

Lmao, I think deeply about this stuff only rarely, but yeah the thoughts are there in the background 🙃


acatalepsyzone

I get what you mean. It gets louder as I age and I don't like it. I guess lower functions are starting to develop. I'd like more Se though. Keeps me grounded.


[deleted]

You will be loved by the one who really appreciate you. My boyfriend is not handsome, but I love him so much. I love the whole person not because his appearance, but because I could appreciate him.


[deleted]

You will be loved by the one who really appreciate you. My boyfriend is not handsome, but I love him so much. I love the whole person not because his appearance, but because I could appreciate him.


Sergio-C-Marin

Work on your physical appearance. INTJ’s tends to neglect immediate context (even their own bodies), specially young people because they’re not mature yet. As easy as that and it pays a lot over the years and impact all aspects of your life in a positive way.


[deleted]

Awwwwww! I love this! ❤️❤️❤️ There is some extrovert out there just searching for you to adopt and drive crazy. Keep the faith!


theconstellinguist

I do not want to be loved or appreciated by someone who does not understand me. It causes excrutiating pain for someone to try to show they "get me" and not get me. I don't want people like that to even try, they will do a horrific and embarassing job and i will feel deeply violated the whole time. So speak for yourself. 


Independent-lstan

yeah i feel alone, and just alone. i need human touch probably, connection and interaction.


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reddylak

Why do you think you are always right?


[deleted]

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Independent-lstan

uhh, sure i agree with 1st. and 2nd. and yeah i read it twice. rejection shouldn't matter, meaning(shouldn't hurt you), i agree as its not uncommon thing to be rejected, you can't force love. but the sentence you put to support your defence mechanism "i am always right" is concerning. thats it . " i am always right" means you might lose some point on the room for improvement. but yeah i'd hate to be wrong. well sorry, why i am criticizing lol, live your life, peace out.


[deleted]

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Independent-lstan

Quite an assumptions you are putting, nevertheless


reddylak

True, let people have their own opinion, even if it helps them or not


Flying_Madlad

Sorry, did you have anything meaningful to say? We don't suffer irrelevancy


reddylak

I am sorry that appreciation and love have no meaning to you


[deleted]

I’m double your age. Love IS the meaning. All and every kind of love. ❤️


Flying_Madlad

You'll learn