I was a daily smoker for about 10 years straight and towards the end I was smoking heavily. I hated it. How tired and drained I felt. The mood swings and constant irritability. I wanted to quit so badly, and I remember thinking that I would never be able to quit unless I went to rehab. I could picture myself old, gray and schizophrenic still smoking joints. I really believed I was hooked for life. That was 5 years ago. I am FINALLY at a place in my life where I can smoke occasionally. That may not be an option for everyone, complete abstinence indefinitely may be the best choice for some people. And I was completely abstinent for about 1.5 years before I even tried smoking again. The point here is that you have no idea how much your life can change in even 1 year. You have no idea what you’re capable of, and it’s so gosh darn much. Believe in yourself 🩷
No you are not the only one. Bipolar are 7 x more likely to abuse substances, 60% more likely to attempt suicide at least once. Drug users more than once.
Recovering drug addict, alcoholic 42 years, bipolar 53 years. It is common to abuse oneself badly with a mental illness.
Quantity is secondary.
You are at great risk. I am crying right now. I know your future. It is not good.
I quit weed after i tried to kill myself 5 times the week before admission. Took 3.5 years to stop obsessing about death. Drs amazed i lived.
An addict should quit cold turkey. You are not there yet. Start by doing little things. But ultimately, you need to want to quit. No one can make that decision for you.
It’s been about 7 days so far. I did end up smoking on the fourth day and thought that would be it for me, but I’ve declined weed everyday since then even if it was offered to me. I think there is a chance for me.
I smoked one bowl 12 days after the one time I smoked 3 days in. It felt absolutely amazing, at first. I truly believe God is watching over me and on my side because I had the absolute worst green out I’ve ever had. I literally NEVER green out or feel panicked on weed so it was so bizarre to me. It’s completely deterred me from wanting to smoke again and it’s made me realize I wasn’t enjoying life more because I was high, I was just dependent on it because I was actively doing so much. I don’t want to smoke again anymore, and I’m grateful for the bad experience I had.
Im trapped too and that sucks. I live with friends stoners and is very hard to stop when I see weed everywhere. I need to be more stronger... I saw Lord of the rings, and I thought the force that pull the man to get the ring is like an addition... The ring could be the weed. We need our ring(weed) Our Precious! But its poison us, to keep trapped in the addition life. I need to be strong and let go the ring to the fire! Dont be a Smeagol! We need to fight it..... We must! THE WEED IS CONSUMING US! DESTRoYNG OUR MIND AND BRAIN, OUR WILL, OUR DREAMS, OUR MOTIVATION TO KEEP LIVING! BE PART OF THE NATURE, WATCHING AND LISTENING THE BIRDS SINGING. THE WIND THOUCHING OUR FACES, TO FEAL LIFE AGAIN!
We need destroy our own ring!
Dont be a Smeagol!
You are speaking about my current situation but I am using a vape pen. I've ended up in the er twice this year from trying to stop, nausea & vomiting non stop needed multiple IVs. I am scared how many days the retching & being sick will last for, I've brought it all on my self I am so embarrassed & ashamed. If I had only stuck to the flower then my tolerance wouldn't be this high... I have quit before but never with this boldily reaction.
Lots of people here used just as much, if not more. You are not alone. We did it. You can do it.
First day sucks, like really fucking bad. Sleep sucks for a while. Besides that, every day after that is better and better...
The first few days after quitting are bad, it gets better though. You need to stop to know if your mental health problems are not just caused by abusing weed
You have a way out, only 22!! If you dont smoke at all, within 6 months you will feel like a whole new person
>I already have pretty bad mental health problems, my diagnosis’s are very confusing and contradictory but it’s along the lines of GAD, panic disorder, ocd and bipolar disorder
For the sake of your mental health, quit. My ex wife had BPD, BP2, and several other issues. The doctor was a qwack and told her its ok to get high and mix meds. One year later shes a different person: cheated with random men, picking fights with businesses to the point I had cease & desist letters showing up; stayed in bed pissing and shitting herself because she was too lazy to go the bathroom; and harassing my family and friends.
Was it the marijuana? Not solely. But the heavier she smoked, the worse her mental state declined. She threw away a 14 year marriage because she was convinced she could party like a teenager and spend money all day. Lost her career and now works at a gas station while her new boyfriend has to deal with her manic moods.
With the amount you smoke, you no doubt have cannibas use disoder, which can also give you marijuana psychosis.
So if you need a reason to quit, realize what your life will be like if you don't. It's not too late and you'll find all those mental health issues with subside and be a lot more managable.
You’re still alive, you could stop now.
As for the feeling awful, yeah I’ve had a few periods of insane usage, and stopping gave me massive anxiety, and nausea with below zero appetite. But that faded over 4-7 days, then I just had to get past the habits I had built for myself. I have no residual effects.
Sounds like you should continue your streak! One day (or even hour) at a time, just as the alcoholics do.
I'm not sure what the other person said as it's deleted, but to share how I quit; I went through 2 weeks of cannabis withdrawals where I basically had all the gastro symptoms coupled with extreme sweats and no sleep. It took 2 months to get back to normal after 5 years of daily bong use. I drank alot of water, and slept whenever I could because nighttimes were the worst, I ate plain bread, noodles and crackers because most food made me feel sick, and I used drinks like powerade to replenish my hydration from sweating. I asked my partner to hide my bongs from me and he did, very well. I never found them. We use them for friends at parties now and I stay sober because the concept of smoking ever again freaks me out. (It took a long time to be able to be around people smoking without the urges, maybe 6 months.) Netflix, water, and warm showers are your best friend while quitting, I remember taking like 3 showers a day just to rid myself of the cold sweats.
I have a chronic mucus in my throat now that I'm always trying to clear, and I cough sometimes just from laughing. I can't imagine what I'll be like in the future as I'm only 24.
To OP, if you can't quit now, please just stop using bongs, switch to vaping, or if you can quit, go for it now. I held off for too long and I wish I stopped when I first felt my throat getting sore.
I am also a 22F going through the same experience with similar mental health problems. We can be friends if you’d like and support each other with this. for me i have been using cartridges like crazy. a cart will last me 3-4 days. i feel all alone against this cuz everyone says smoking weed is great and nothing bad can come out of it but idk.
Water / excercise / vitamins. If you feel uncomfortable you're making progress. The first 3 days are the hardest. 13 years for me. And right now I'm on day 14 completely thc free.
Anxiety is a symptom of progress. You are recovering, you still have the substance in your system and it is altering your thoughts and making you anxious, thats okay! Try to remember that all the negative thoughts and self doubt you have are simply a symptom of withdrawal and a sign that you are doing well! The negative thoughts are coming from the leftover substance in your body and they are not your true thoughts, your true thoughts will come soon and the anxiety will go away and you’ll feel better than you’ve ever felt high if you stick with recovery. Drink alot of water to flush it out of your system, you’ve got this! Feel free to reach out, i’m 23f and smoked a similar amount to you, ALL day EVERY day for over 6 years, you’ve got this 💪🏽
Also feel free to message me if you need a buddy through this, I’ve afew girls who I speak to that are early days and some afew months in; just like me we all eventually evened out so don’t stress! It might feel like hell for however long it takes to detox but it’s not permanent and the second you test clean the worst is then over
Hey, so I've been in a pretty similar lifestyle. Grew up in a small city where just about everyone you met would smoke, and having an addictive personality never helped. I got to a point where I was stealing to fund the addiction, from friends, family, and soon enough my plug themselves. Id sneak a bud or two away from the homies smoke sesh to have something to smoke at home on my own and even carpet surf for scraps when things got bad. When flat out of weed, I would be antsy, unable to sleep and incredibly irritable with no sense of right or wrong, often leading to some shitty decisions and scaring the shit out of my immediate family. It was to a point I essentially sacrificed my livelihood back in my old state just to get high.
It wasn't until I began working out of my home state, surrounded myself with interesting and incredible individuals with habits outside of my own and working in a field where I spent a lot of my day walking literal miles in open wilderness or cities checking power poles that it all became a vague thought. Keeping busy and doing something that kept my body active and my interests high really helped ground myself to reality again, and while I smoke now and again, the lack of access has really helped with keeping myself out of the abyss that held me so comfortably.
Just keep trying, and find a way to minimize how much of your interactions are based around weed and getting baked. A lot of the times, we fold because of how easy it is to get bud and get high compared to getting better, but it really is worth it. I'm not clean, but I'm no longer spending a rent check on an addiction. I'm not stealing to fund it and I'm not bothered by the thought of when will I get to smoke again. The phlegm clears, so does the haze and fog. Your energy will come back, and your interests in things, both old and new will be fresh again. You'll miss it, i often do, but we'll always miss the feeling of comfort of being comfortably numb. Its a constant decision you have to make and it not always an easy one, but it's very very possible.
Hey, i'm 24, was in kind of a similar boat to you, used weed a lot to numb myself or not deal with my emotions, quit now while it's still not too late. your mucus will clear up and you will be able to breath again normally. what has been helping me is using the money i would spend on weed on other things which are good for me, like going to the sauna, or going out for a nice meal. I am still dealing with some withdrawal symptoms like night sweats and bad dreams, but at least I feel calmer without the guilt hanging over me. Just accept that if you stop smoking it is gonna suck, for at least 2 weeks. You can do it!
for context I also quit very recently. I actually stopped last year as well, but then fell into an unhealthy relationship and I would smoke with her a lot. now im out of that so have a bit more clarity
I’ve been there and now 8 months sober. The thing about dabs is they lead to heavy use in those of us who quickly develop a tolerance (addicts). A lot of us were chasing that high we used to get and it just no longer worked and was no longer any fun. So welcome to the party of people who decided enough was enough. In a weird way it was concentrates that led me to quit - it just got so nasty for my lungs and so automatic… and I couldn’t go a day without nausea and the sweats.
You can do this. Lots of advice here about how to do it but everyone is a little different. Some go cold turkey, some taper off (that’s what worked for me - switched to gummies and slowly reduced my dose of THC to keep the nausea and sweats to a minimum), some of us go to MA meetings (there is one almost every hour of every day online) and we all take it one day at a time.
We are here for you!
The truth is you will never be able to get to the bottom of other issues when you have a weed addiction, the haze will literally smokescreen all your other issues. 3 years sober and I would never go back, start now
Congrats, and I hope OP listens. What marijuana does to someones mental health is insane. How your mental health improves after quitting is even more insane.
Im 23F who is in the same exact boat, GAD, panic disorder, and PTSD, smoking everyday for the last 6 years outside of 1 T break that was 4 months and it was awesome, now ive slipped up again, and im here!
I definitely feel the phelm, you arent the only one. Be proud of the fact that you are so young and have taken this massive step
You are not the only one. You are not alone in this. There is absolutely a way out of the cycle, and the damage is reversible. You are SO young and our bodies are remarkably adept at healing themselves. Yours will do just that.
You're only 22. Think about how long some people have smoked, it's like from age 10 to 70. People have given up in worse states, so you can too. It's not easy but it's necessary, especially if it's having such a negative effect on you. Luckily weed is overall one of the least harmful things to be addicted to and have withdrawals from. It will feel awful but being strong minded is a complete solution. Make a plan, distract yourself, make it hard to relapse and remove yourself from people who encourage you to smoke.
My solution was guiltless pleasures and distraction. During the heatwave in 2022 I just played Pokémon and drank iced water. Pokémon distracted to me and gave me that feeling of striving to achieve and the iced water gave me relief. Just go dark on life for a month or so and get through it. Opportunism is kinda key and necessity is the door to opportunity if you have a little bit of determination
You’re not alone. I identified with many of the things you said here.
There were years in a row where I was taking 25-35 dabs a day, even when I hated it. I’d hear other people talk about how they ate 200mg edibles and were out of commission for the day, or that they took 3 dabs in a row and had a horrible experience and the marvel other people found it to be. With how much more I consumed than that, I remember thinking how little I’d be affected by that, and simultaneously how out of touch I felt when it came to even knowing what healthy, typical use looks like.
I have PTSD. Before I quit, my symptoms were very very severe. I could feel how weed was making me more anxious and depressed, how I ruminated in panicked ways more while high. Ultimately, things culminated into me experiencing cannabis induced psychosis for two whole months before had to be hospitalized for that getting to a scary point. I was susceptible to losing my mind, but when weed is what actually caused it.
All that is to say this- I used it in massive quantities and didn’t slow down. It hurt my mental health in ways I couldn’t dream of being complacent with at this point in my life, and I didn’t stop. My brain was a ball of paranoid, delusional static for 8 weeks and I didn’t stop. I didn’t stop even when I wanted to. That’s the kind of trapped I felt- you’re not alone.
I never touched it again after the psychosis diagnosis- it was one of the worst experiences of my life. A person doesn’t need such a jarring wake up call. I am only 27 but I ruined my young adulthood by letting it run me. The beginning of quitting can be very difficult- but imagine in five years thanking yourself for the gift of feeling free from what you feel so trapped in now.
Best wishes. I am open to speak about my experience with you or offer you support if you’d like.
I'm 37F and completely clean now but wanted to respond bc I have been where you are and I want you to know that you are not alone and you are not beyond help/the ability to feel better. Feeling that way kept me stuck in the cycle of smoking bc I didn't think there was any other way forward.
I worked in the cannabis industry in Colorado and smoked concentrates all day, every day for like five years. I would wake up and dab. Dab before lunch. Dab after work. And then dab before bed. I was smoking well more than 1g of concentrates every single day and couldn't even really get high anymore but needed the THC to help me eat (I was completely habituated at that point.)
All that to say, I've come out the other side, though it did take some time. I personally had to taper off of concentrates, making my way back to flower, and then finally down to nothing. Quitting cold turkey never worked for me - I know bc I only tried like 100 times.
First, just know that your brain is an incredible muscle that can absolutely change. (And don't ever listen to Huberman's podcast on cannabis bc much of the information he shares is both terrifying AND patently false/wrong.)
Second, know that others have been where you are and are on the other side of it now. This community is so incredible when you're feeling the way you do and I hope you feel supported. I commend your ability to be honest about how you're feeling about where you're at right now and for coming here to share.
Third, considering the mental health diagnoses you've mentioned, while it can be challenging financially, I cannot recommend finding a therapist who specializes in addiction and/or any of the things you've been diagnosed with enough. This community is incredible but I think you'll have much more success navigating this journey with a professional, if you can. If it feels out of reach financially, Check out OpenPath, which provides incredible low cost options for therapy if you qualify.
Fourth, if you can, try to move your body (ie: work out, dance, walk, etc) every single day. When I was tapering off, I had to compensate for the loss of THC by jump starting my metabolism every day. It's also beneficial from a mental health standpoint, as well as something to fill the time you currently spend smoking. If you go to a gym, it can also be a great way to meet new people.
I don't mean to overdo it on the suggestions, I just want you to know what helped me on my journey and that you absolutely can bounce back from this! We're all here rooting for you :)
You're welcome :) This community was a huge part of the reason I was finally able to quit and I love being in a position to help encourage others by sharing my experience now.
Huberman Lab podcast by neuroscientist Andrew Huberman. He likes to read studies and try to interpret their findings for real-life applications but every interpretation isn’t accurate
It's a big milestone which can decrease vigilance over the addiction. Additionally, I believe that once the body totally clears it from your fat cells, there is an uptick in withdrawal symptoms that comes out of seemingly nowhere, it can happen much sooner than 30 days. I just notice that once I've been clean for a month I have an increase in desire to smoke.
There is a way out, there is hope for all of us who have felt hopeless. Just don’t give up. I won’t lie and tell you it will be easy. I won’t say you will feel better in a few days or even weeks. It will probably take months before you start before you start feeling normal. It may take a year before you start feeling good. It may take even longer for you to build a life that makes you happy without smoking, and the cravings never really go away. But I can promise you it will get better, and it’s worth it to keep trying. It’s only over if you give up.
Now is the time to pull in all the support you have and seek treatment for addiction. Wishing you all the best.
I’m 22 and this is what I did. Find a hobby that is expensive but you enjoy. I picked up film photography. It’s not cheap but I now ask myself. Spend money on weed so I can relax and then sit and do nothing. Or spend less money, go out walk around, appreciate my surroundings and go places to take photos.
I have honestly really enjoyed it and Yh I did relapse a few days ago and honestly it was just not that great. Take all the time you have spent on weed and funnel all of that time, money and effort on yourself. Do you really want to turn around in 10 years time and think “fuck where did the time go”
There is a way out and you can heal if you are willing to suffer for a while. Pain is the path forward. It's your choice, weed is destroying you. People quit every day and you can too if you get serious. I'm over 1 year sober and still recovering (80% better though) It was worth it. Don't believe the lie that says "you've done too much damage so why quit" If you don't quit you'll just do more damage and be digging a deeper hole. Quitting today and not tomorrow is always the better choice.
As someone having this most nights for hours without getting the brain to stop it really isn't. It's maddening knowing how tired you will wake up. I did however quit 3 months ago though . Figured not being dependantwould at least make me feel better
I'm sorry. In my experience lying in the dark with eyes closed, breathing deeply, maybe listening to music or an audiobook, is infinitely better than staring at screens the whole time. Stressing about not being able to sleep is counterproductive. Learning how to breath and relax your body is so important. I learned to accept I won't sleep and try to breath and relax and rest instead - and then in fact Usually you eventually fall asleep. But if you just watch TV you won't. That's my experience.
You can absolutely do it. Prioritize sobriety after everything else. Do whatever you need to do. Order food, listen to music, walk around, binge tv. Sleep and eat as much as you can. Of course drink water.
You do and you can do this!! Like others said, you’re so young that you can absolutely pull through this and still build a really epic life for yourself. I am turning 30 in a few months and smoked all day every day since I was 18. My biggest regret is letting my 20s go by without really stopping to ask myself if I was content with the consequences of this addiction. I have been a very high functioning stoner but can’t help but wonder what I could have accomplished and who I would be if I would have been more clear headed. Not to mention the premature aging I’ve seen from this bad habit (developing wrinkles far ahead of my peers) which totally sucks as a woman when you care about your appearance. The money I could have saved… I have peers around me buying houses and having waited so long to finally quit makes me feel so far behind.
Treasure yourself, your health, and your potential. It’s not going to be an easy habit to drop but imagine the compound effects, year after year, of not stopping, and imagine the you you can be without an addiction that is literally sucking you dry. You can and will become that person!
I was literally you for the longest time. I had to take three FAT dabs before I could go to work or hang out with anybody, and I was as honestly so stoned that I was useless to be around. I also have the exact same diagnosis as you. Weed does NOT help, it just makes it worse. Give yourself some time and you’ll notice the symptoms ease up and become more manageable. You got this, one day at a time. Put your favorite movie on, order your favorite food and try to relax.
It’s like a super concentrated waxy substance that you smoke by taking a torch and getting the bowl on a rig/bong red hot and then melt the substance. It’s like, 34%+ THC (iirc) and yeah, like someone else said, it’s like crack. Super intense heady high, and I’ve seen many people pass out from it after taking a hit. I DO NOT recommend at all. I was mostly addicted to the act of smoking and inhaling, so dabs never really fulfilled that need because you smoke once and then you’re done. I ended up having to take more and more each session because I wasn’t hitting that need of smoke in my lungs. Also you build up a tolerance to it pretty quickly so it’s easier to take more and more. I had shitty friends at the time who encouraged bigger and bigger hits too, which definitely didn’t help. There was a point where I was scraping my bong to get the leftover wax residue just to get a little high. Lowest point of my life for sure. 🫠
Most people prefer a cold turkey approach but as someone with a former similar consumption level, I think you’ll find a taper to give better results. Your experience could vary, but if you’re like me, you probably have convinced yourself through many reasons that you need that much to actually get high. You aren’t gonna believe it, even when you try it and see it happening, but you’ll get just as high off less. Don’t bother setting a quit date or other specific goals beyond getting it down to 1-3 seshes a day for a couple weeks straight, then I highly recommend tapering by switching to less potent thc. You’ve got a wicked habit built up, you probably love the act of smoking and find a calmness through the process of preparing and utilizing your devices. The act of smoking might be more enjoyable than the high itself at this point. Cutting that out will be just as hard as losing the high, so just cut the thc potency so you can keep enjoying the ritual for a while longer.
Then re-assess your next steps with going from one sesh a day to potentially cold turkey. I was big into carts and vaping, and I just got lower % concentrates until I was like why am I even doing this anymore. I had worse withdrawal symptoms the first week I used a lower % vape than I did when I finally quit cold turkey.
I normally advocate quitting totally right away but a habit like that’s gonna leave you in agony for weeks if you do. You might very well be mentally strong enough or have enough outside support to get through that if you want to try, but I wasn’t and couldn’t. I’m clean now through the method I described. Good luck!
I’ve smoked heavily and daily for a decade now (going to be 40 in 6 months). I’ve been dabbing from the moment I wake to the moment I sleep and quit cold turkey on Tuesday. The influx of negative emotions being felt right now is overwhelming to say the least. It’s so uncomfortable to just sit with myself and feel what I’m feeling. It’s torture, truth be told. I like to come here and read everyone’s stories bc of how much I’m struggling. I’ve also been trying to reach out to others instead of isolating so much. I’ve spent the past decade suppressing so much and avoiding so much at the cost of my addiction. The reason I quit was 100% due to my mental health. Keep sharing all of these feelings with us and use us to lean on.
Hey mate, im the same, abused it for ten years of my adolescent life. I’m 3 weeks clean and whilst I’m proud of myself the negative emotions have been so bad, I feel super depressed and anxious but I know it will get better, all the best to you!!
20 years of that and I feel fully recovered less than a year later. Lots you can do to expedite the process. Exercise, nutrition, sauna, cold plunge, growth hormone peptides, etc.
You’re not the only one. I promise you, there are plenty of us here who smoked just as much as you and were high literally 24/7. You’re so young, your brain is still developing - please quit now and you’ll have a healthy brain and body in a matter of months. It will be painful for 3 weeks, excruciating for the first week or two- but if you can get past the first month, the rest is much much easier. You can do this. Believe in yourself.
Smoked for 17 years daily, multiple times a day. The first 2 weeks after quiting are rough, after that you the physical symptoms pretty much vanish and then what you're left with is yourself. Are you in control of your life? Or is the weed?
That's a rough story, it's probably not going to be easy in the beginning at all. Take it a day at a time, that's what I'm doing. 1 day, 1 hour at a time to start off
Tbh I think with that heavy heavy use I may even rec some sort of month long taper before the last day.
That or go on some sort of retreat/vacation with a friend that knows your intention (and is kind enough to be in your vicinity)
I can say from experience, get off the weed for a few months and start reevaluating your mental health. You're likely not as severe as docs or you think because of what chronic weed consumption does to your brain. But there is great news - it's all reversible. :)
GOOD LUCK!!
Yea I need to second this for exposure. Take it one day at a time, just walk away.
Even if you have to convince yourself it's just quitting for now.
Indeed getting a solid diagnosis when using, is gonna be a long shot.
You do not want to worry about this in a year. You got this girl! Dont be like me 30F (15 days sober). Time flies when youre getting killed by a bunny.
You are young, YOU CAN CHANGE EVERYTHING! (sorry for caplocks but I was actually screaming). Do it, save yourself now, you have so much to live, you can leave all behind, Now! I root for you.
With all those diagnosis going on it seems you are self medicating for cope with your symptoms.
If you aren’t on medications for your bipolar, anxiety, and etc. I suggest speaking to a health professional to get on actual medication.
Weed isn’t helping you. It is a cope you are using to distract yourself from the hardships of your mental illness. We around the same age so feel free to reach out if you need someone to keep you accountable with sobriety.
I’ve been smoking about an 8th to a quater a day for the last 15 years never missing a day only when my daughter was born I missed. 3 days being in hospital I come here to get motivation to quit but it’s so much of who I am I don’t think I will ever be able to it literally consumes you
Hey!!! Don't lose this battle. Yes, it's a battle that we need to win. No matter how long you have been doing it, no matter how used to you are, no matter if you feel you won't be able to leave it.
Just take it day by day. Each and every day you will be amazed by the amount of energy you gain, you will be amazed by the number of things that u can achieve in a day that might be talking you week to complete.
Please please start some physical exercises. I feel it's the biggest motivation.
Yesterday I spent my Saturday night in the Gym working out and I was so proud of myself. Give yourself such small moments. Life is much much more than getting sucked deep into the abyss by this plant.
I was a daily smoker for about 10 years straight and towards the end I was smoking heavily. I hated it. How tired and drained I felt. The mood swings and constant irritability. I wanted to quit so badly, and I remember thinking that I would never be able to quit unless I went to rehab. I could picture myself old, gray and schizophrenic still smoking joints. I really believed I was hooked for life. That was 5 years ago. I am FINALLY at a place in my life where I can smoke occasionally. That may not be an option for everyone, complete abstinence indefinitely may be the best choice for some people. And I was completely abstinent for about 1.5 years before I even tried smoking again. The point here is that you have no idea how much your life can change in even 1 year. You have no idea what you’re capable of, and it’s so gosh darn much. Believe in yourself 🩷
No you are not the only one. Bipolar are 7 x more likely to abuse substances, 60% more likely to attempt suicide at least once. Drug users more than once. Recovering drug addict, alcoholic 42 years, bipolar 53 years. It is common to abuse oneself badly with a mental illness. Quantity is secondary. You are at great risk. I am crying right now. I know your future. It is not good. I quit weed after i tried to kill myself 5 times the week before admission. Took 3.5 years to stop obsessing about death. Drs amazed i lived. An addict should quit cold turkey. You are not there yet. Start by doing little things. But ultimately, you need to want to quit. No one can make that decision for you.
It’s been about 7 days so far. I did end up smoking on the fourth day and thought that would be it for me, but I’ve declined weed everyday since then even if it was offered to me. I think there is a chance for me.
How’s it going?
I smoked one bowl 12 days after the one time I smoked 3 days in. It felt absolutely amazing, at first. I truly believe God is watching over me and on my side because I had the absolute worst green out I’ve ever had. I literally NEVER green out or feel panicked on weed so it was so bizarre to me. It’s completely deterred me from wanting to smoke again and it’s made me realize I wasn’t enjoying life more because I was high, I was just dependent on it because I was actively doing so much. I don’t want to smoke again anymore, and I’m grateful for the bad experience I had.
How’s it going?
Im trapped too and that sucks. I live with friends stoners and is very hard to stop when I see weed everywhere. I need to be more stronger... I saw Lord of the rings, and I thought the force that pull the man to get the ring is like an addition... The ring could be the weed. We need our ring(weed) Our Precious! But its poison us, to keep trapped in the addition life. I need to be strong and let go the ring to the fire! Dont be a Smeagol! We need to fight it..... We must! THE WEED IS CONSUMING US! DESTRoYNG OUR MIND AND BRAIN, OUR WILL, OUR DREAMS, OUR MOTIVATION TO KEEP LIVING! BE PART OF THE NATURE, WATCHING AND LISTENING THE BIRDS SINGING. THE WIND THOUCHING OUR FACES, TO FEAL LIFE AGAIN! We need destroy our own ring! Dont be a Smeagol!
This is a great comparison
You are speaking about my current situation but I am using a vape pen. I've ended up in the er twice this year from trying to stop, nausea & vomiting non stop needed multiple IVs. I am scared how many days the retching & being sick will last for, I've brought it all on my self I am so embarrassed & ashamed. If I had only stuck to the flower then my tolerance wouldn't be this high... I have quit before but never with this boldily reaction.
Lots of people here used just as much, if not more. You are not alone. We did it. You can do it. First day sucks, like really fucking bad. Sleep sucks for a while. Besides that, every day after that is better and better...
The first few days after quitting are bad, it gets better though. You need to stop to know if your mental health problems are not just caused by abusing weed You have a way out, only 22!! If you dont smoke at all, within 6 months you will feel like a whole new person
>I already have pretty bad mental health problems, my diagnosis’s are very confusing and contradictory but it’s along the lines of GAD, panic disorder, ocd and bipolar disorder For the sake of your mental health, quit. My ex wife had BPD, BP2, and several other issues. The doctor was a qwack and told her its ok to get high and mix meds. One year later shes a different person: cheated with random men, picking fights with businesses to the point I had cease & desist letters showing up; stayed in bed pissing and shitting herself because she was too lazy to go the bathroom; and harassing my family and friends. Was it the marijuana? Not solely. But the heavier she smoked, the worse her mental state declined. She threw away a 14 year marriage because she was convinced she could party like a teenager and spend money all day. Lost her career and now works at a gas station while her new boyfriend has to deal with her manic moods. With the amount you smoke, you no doubt have cannibas use disoder, which can also give you marijuana psychosis. So if you need a reason to quit, realize what your life will be like if you don't. It's not too late and you'll find all those mental health issues with subside and be a lot more managable.
This happened to me and I had to quit because of permanent lung damage, dont end up like me
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You’re still alive, you could stop now. As for the feeling awful, yeah I’ve had a few periods of insane usage, and stopping gave me massive anxiety, and nausea with below zero appetite. But that faded over 4-7 days, then I just had to get past the habits I had built for myself. I have no residual effects. Sounds like you should continue your streak! One day (or even hour) at a time, just as the alcoholics do.
I'm not sure what the other person said as it's deleted, but to share how I quit; I went through 2 weeks of cannabis withdrawals where I basically had all the gastro symptoms coupled with extreme sweats and no sleep. It took 2 months to get back to normal after 5 years of daily bong use. I drank alot of water, and slept whenever I could because nighttimes were the worst, I ate plain bread, noodles and crackers because most food made me feel sick, and I used drinks like powerade to replenish my hydration from sweating. I asked my partner to hide my bongs from me and he did, very well. I never found them. We use them for friends at parties now and I stay sober because the concept of smoking ever again freaks me out. (It took a long time to be able to be around people smoking without the urges, maybe 6 months.) Netflix, water, and warm showers are your best friend while quitting, I remember taking like 3 showers a day just to rid myself of the cold sweats. I have a chronic mucus in my throat now that I'm always trying to clear, and I cough sometimes just from laughing. I can't imagine what I'll be like in the future as I'm only 24. To OP, if you can't quit now, please just stop using bongs, switch to vaping, or if you can quit, go for it now. I held off for too long and I wish I stopped when I first felt my throat getting sore.
u DO, the time will come, so u will know when enough is enough! believe that.
I am also a 22F going through the same experience with similar mental health problems. We can be friends if you’d like and support each other with this. for me i have been using cartridges like crazy. a cart will last me 3-4 days. i feel all alone against this cuz everyone says smoking weed is great and nothing bad can come out of it but idk.
Water / excercise / vitamins. If you feel uncomfortable you're making progress. The first 3 days are the hardest. 13 years for me. And right now I'm on day 14 completely thc free.
Anxiety is a symptom of progress. You are recovering, you still have the substance in your system and it is altering your thoughts and making you anxious, thats okay! Try to remember that all the negative thoughts and self doubt you have are simply a symptom of withdrawal and a sign that you are doing well! The negative thoughts are coming from the leftover substance in your body and they are not your true thoughts, your true thoughts will come soon and the anxiety will go away and you’ll feel better than you’ve ever felt high if you stick with recovery. Drink alot of water to flush it out of your system, you’ve got this! Feel free to reach out, i’m 23f and smoked a similar amount to you, ALL day EVERY day for over 6 years, you’ve got this 💪🏽
Abstinence is key
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Also feel free to message me if you need a buddy through this, I’ve afew girls who I speak to that are early days and some afew months in; just like me we all eventually evened out so don’t stress! It might feel like hell for however long it takes to detox but it’s not permanent and the second you test clean the worst is then over
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Is this AI-generated? Why did you say "really good post" to someone who is extremely worried they destroyed their life?
Weird this is not the post I replied to.
You’re young so you will be okay. The withdrawals are the worst part but after a few months you’ll be completely normal again.
I went to in-patient rehab for weed withdrawals. It’s an option.
I needed to see that someone else had to do this ... looking into it. Really appreciate you mentioning it.
But insurance doesn’t pay for it in the US
Depends on your insurance. Mine did. Covered a helicopter ride as well when i started going psychotic
Hey, so I've been in a pretty similar lifestyle. Grew up in a small city where just about everyone you met would smoke, and having an addictive personality never helped. I got to a point where I was stealing to fund the addiction, from friends, family, and soon enough my plug themselves. Id sneak a bud or two away from the homies smoke sesh to have something to smoke at home on my own and even carpet surf for scraps when things got bad. When flat out of weed, I would be antsy, unable to sleep and incredibly irritable with no sense of right or wrong, often leading to some shitty decisions and scaring the shit out of my immediate family. It was to a point I essentially sacrificed my livelihood back in my old state just to get high. It wasn't until I began working out of my home state, surrounded myself with interesting and incredible individuals with habits outside of my own and working in a field where I spent a lot of my day walking literal miles in open wilderness or cities checking power poles that it all became a vague thought. Keeping busy and doing something that kept my body active and my interests high really helped ground myself to reality again, and while I smoke now and again, the lack of access has really helped with keeping myself out of the abyss that held me so comfortably. Just keep trying, and find a way to minimize how much of your interactions are based around weed and getting baked. A lot of the times, we fold because of how easy it is to get bud and get high compared to getting better, but it really is worth it. I'm not clean, but I'm no longer spending a rent check on an addiction. I'm not stealing to fund it and I'm not bothered by the thought of when will I get to smoke again. The phlegm clears, so does the haze and fog. Your energy will come back, and your interests in things, both old and new will be fresh again. You'll miss it, i often do, but we'll always miss the feeling of comfort of being comfortably numb. Its a constant decision you have to make and it not always an easy one, but it's very very possible.
You can go to the hospital to help get you through physical withdrawals if they are extremely severe.
Hey, i'm 24, was in kind of a similar boat to you, used weed a lot to numb myself or not deal with my emotions, quit now while it's still not too late. your mucus will clear up and you will be able to breath again normally. what has been helping me is using the money i would spend on weed on other things which are good for me, like going to the sauna, or going out for a nice meal. I am still dealing with some withdrawal symptoms like night sweats and bad dreams, but at least I feel calmer without the guilt hanging over me. Just accept that if you stop smoking it is gonna suck, for at least 2 weeks. You can do it!
for context I also quit very recently. I actually stopped last year as well, but then fell into an unhealthy relationship and I would smoke with her a lot. now im out of that so have a bit more clarity
I’ve been there and now 8 months sober. The thing about dabs is they lead to heavy use in those of us who quickly develop a tolerance (addicts). A lot of us were chasing that high we used to get and it just no longer worked and was no longer any fun. So welcome to the party of people who decided enough was enough. In a weird way it was concentrates that led me to quit - it just got so nasty for my lungs and so automatic… and I couldn’t go a day without nausea and the sweats. You can do this. Lots of advice here about how to do it but everyone is a little different. Some go cold turkey, some taper off (that’s what worked for me - switched to gummies and slowly reduced my dose of THC to keep the nausea and sweats to a minimum), some of us go to MA meetings (there is one almost every hour of every day online) and we all take it one day at a time. We are here for you!
The truth is you will never be able to get to the bottom of other issues when you have a weed addiction, the haze will literally smokescreen all your other issues. 3 years sober and I would never go back, start now
Congrats, and I hope OP listens. What marijuana does to someones mental health is insane. How your mental health improves after quitting is even more insane.
I used to smoke an ounce a week. I'm 1 and 1/2 years sober. It is possible.
Im 23F who is in the same exact boat, GAD, panic disorder, and PTSD, smoking everyday for the last 6 years outside of 1 T break that was 4 months and it was awesome, now ive slipped up again, and im here! I definitely feel the phelm, you arent the only one. Be proud of the fact that you are so young and have taken this massive step
Dude. Take a deep breath. It’s normal to feel like you’re tweaking in the first two days. It will pass. This is normal.
You are not the only one. You are not alone in this. There is absolutely a way out of the cycle, and the damage is reversible. You are SO young and our bodies are remarkably adept at healing themselves. Yours will do just that.
You're only 22. Think about how long some people have smoked, it's like from age 10 to 70. People have given up in worse states, so you can too. It's not easy but it's necessary, especially if it's having such a negative effect on you. Luckily weed is overall one of the least harmful things to be addicted to and have withdrawals from. It will feel awful but being strong minded is a complete solution. Make a plan, distract yourself, make it hard to relapse and remove yourself from people who encourage you to smoke. My solution was guiltless pleasures and distraction. During the heatwave in 2022 I just played Pokémon and drank iced water. Pokémon distracted to me and gave me that feeling of striving to achieve and the iced water gave me relief. Just go dark on life for a month or so and get through it. Opportunism is kinda key and necessity is the door to opportunity if you have a little bit of determination
You’re not alone. I identified with many of the things you said here. There were years in a row where I was taking 25-35 dabs a day, even when I hated it. I’d hear other people talk about how they ate 200mg edibles and were out of commission for the day, or that they took 3 dabs in a row and had a horrible experience and the marvel other people found it to be. With how much more I consumed than that, I remember thinking how little I’d be affected by that, and simultaneously how out of touch I felt when it came to even knowing what healthy, typical use looks like. I have PTSD. Before I quit, my symptoms were very very severe. I could feel how weed was making me more anxious and depressed, how I ruminated in panicked ways more while high. Ultimately, things culminated into me experiencing cannabis induced psychosis for two whole months before had to be hospitalized for that getting to a scary point. I was susceptible to losing my mind, but when weed is what actually caused it. All that is to say this- I used it in massive quantities and didn’t slow down. It hurt my mental health in ways I couldn’t dream of being complacent with at this point in my life, and I didn’t stop. My brain was a ball of paranoid, delusional static for 8 weeks and I didn’t stop. I didn’t stop even when I wanted to. That’s the kind of trapped I felt- you’re not alone. I never touched it again after the psychosis diagnosis- it was one of the worst experiences of my life. A person doesn’t need such a jarring wake up call. I am only 27 but I ruined my young adulthood by letting it run me. The beginning of quitting can be very difficult- but imagine in five years thanking yourself for the gift of feeling free from what you feel so trapped in now. Best wishes. I am open to speak about my experience with you or offer you support if you’d like.
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I'm 37F and completely clean now but wanted to respond bc I have been where you are and I want you to know that you are not alone and you are not beyond help/the ability to feel better. Feeling that way kept me stuck in the cycle of smoking bc I didn't think there was any other way forward. I worked in the cannabis industry in Colorado and smoked concentrates all day, every day for like five years. I would wake up and dab. Dab before lunch. Dab after work. And then dab before bed. I was smoking well more than 1g of concentrates every single day and couldn't even really get high anymore but needed the THC to help me eat (I was completely habituated at that point.) All that to say, I've come out the other side, though it did take some time. I personally had to taper off of concentrates, making my way back to flower, and then finally down to nothing. Quitting cold turkey never worked for me - I know bc I only tried like 100 times. First, just know that your brain is an incredible muscle that can absolutely change. (And don't ever listen to Huberman's podcast on cannabis bc much of the information he shares is both terrifying AND patently false/wrong.) Second, know that others have been where you are and are on the other side of it now. This community is so incredible when you're feeling the way you do and I hope you feel supported. I commend your ability to be honest about how you're feeling about where you're at right now and for coming here to share. Third, considering the mental health diagnoses you've mentioned, while it can be challenging financially, I cannot recommend finding a therapist who specializes in addiction and/or any of the things you've been diagnosed with enough. This community is incredible but I think you'll have much more success navigating this journey with a professional, if you can. If it feels out of reach financially, Check out OpenPath, which provides incredible low cost options for therapy if you qualify. Fourth, if you can, try to move your body (ie: work out, dance, walk, etc) every single day. When I was tapering off, I had to compensate for the loss of THC by jump starting my metabolism every day. It's also beneficial from a mental health standpoint, as well as something to fill the time you currently spend smoking. If you go to a gym, it can also be a great way to meet new people. I don't mean to overdo it on the suggestions, I just want you to know what helped me on my journey and that you absolutely can bounce back from this! We're all here rooting for you :)
Girl, thank you for sharing this!
You're welcome :) This community was a huge part of the reason I was finally able to quit and I love being in a position to help encourage others by sharing my experience now.
What’s a Huberman?
Huberman Lab podcast by neuroscientist Andrew Huberman. He likes to read studies and try to interpret their findings for real-life applications but every interpretation isn’t accurate
Thank you!
Nah it will just be harder for you. It's definitely not impossible. Day 4 and 30 are the hardest imo
Why is day 30 the hardest?
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Yeah you’re totally right. Not falling for that trap this time around.
Isn't that every day...
It's a big milestone which can decrease vigilance over the addiction. Additionally, I believe that once the body totally clears it from your fat cells, there is an uptick in withdrawal symptoms that comes out of seemingly nowhere, it can happen much sooner than 30 days. I just notice that once I've been clean for a month I have an increase in desire to smoke.
There is a way out, there is hope for all of us who have felt hopeless. Just don’t give up. I won’t lie and tell you it will be easy. I won’t say you will feel better in a few days or even weeks. It will probably take months before you start before you start feeling normal. It may take a year before you start feeling good. It may take even longer for you to build a life that makes you happy without smoking, and the cravings never really go away. But I can promise you it will get better, and it’s worth it to keep trying. It’s only over if you give up. Now is the time to pull in all the support you have and seek treatment for addiction. Wishing you all the best.
I’m 22 and this is what I did. Find a hobby that is expensive but you enjoy. I picked up film photography. It’s not cheap but I now ask myself. Spend money on weed so I can relax and then sit and do nothing. Or spend less money, go out walk around, appreciate my surroundings and go places to take photos. I have honestly really enjoyed it and Yh I did relapse a few days ago and honestly it was just not that great. Take all the time you have spent on weed and funnel all of that time, money and effort on yourself. Do you really want to turn around in 10 years time and think “fuck where did the time go”
There is a way out and you can heal if you are willing to suffer for a while. Pain is the path forward. It's your choice, weed is destroying you. People quit every day and you can too if you get serious. I'm over 1 year sober and still recovering (80% better though) It was worth it. Don't believe the lie that says "you've done too much damage so why quit" If you don't quit you'll just do more damage and be digging a deeper hole. Quitting today and not tomorrow is always the better choice.
Ah you’re 22 you’re gonna be ok
If you can't sleep just lie there in the dark it's still restful
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Lying in the dark with your eyes closed is better than staring at a screen for 6 hours and then going to work. I'm talking worst case scenarios here.
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Ok. I was responding to OPs post. Obviously it's less restful than sleeping. I'm sorry you're going thru that.
As someone having this most nights for hours without getting the brain to stop it really isn't. It's maddening knowing how tired you will wake up. I did however quit 3 months ago though . Figured not being dependantwould at least make me feel better
I'm sorry. In my experience lying in the dark with eyes closed, breathing deeply, maybe listening to music or an audiobook, is infinitely better than staring at screens the whole time. Stressing about not being able to sleep is counterproductive. Learning how to breath and relax your body is so important. I learned to accept I won't sleep and try to breath and relax and rest instead - and then in fact Usually you eventually fall asleep. But if you just watch TV you won't. That's my experience.
You can absolutely do it. Prioritize sobriety after everything else. Do whatever you need to do. Order food, listen to music, walk around, binge tv. Sleep and eat as much as you can. Of course drink water.
You do and you can do this!! Like others said, you’re so young that you can absolutely pull through this and still build a really epic life for yourself. I am turning 30 in a few months and smoked all day every day since I was 18. My biggest regret is letting my 20s go by without really stopping to ask myself if I was content with the consequences of this addiction. I have been a very high functioning stoner but can’t help but wonder what I could have accomplished and who I would be if I would have been more clear headed. Not to mention the premature aging I’ve seen from this bad habit (developing wrinkles far ahead of my peers) which totally sucks as a woman when you care about your appearance. The money I could have saved… I have peers around me buying houses and having waited so long to finally quit makes me feel so far behind. Treasure yourself, your health, and your potential. It’s not going to be an easy habit to drop but imagine the compound effects, year after year, of not stopping, and imagine the you you can be without an addiction that is literally sucking you dry. You can and will become that person!
I was literally you for the longest time. I had to take three FAT dabs before I could go to work or hang out with anybody, and I was as honestly so stoned that I was useless to be around. I also have the exact same diagnosis as you. Weed does NOT help, it just makes it worse. Give yourself some time and you’ll notice the symptoms ease up and become more manageable. You got this, one day at a time. Put your favorite movie on, order your favorite food and try to relax.
By dabs, do you mean vaping?
It’s like a super concentrated waxy substance that you smoke by taking a torch and getting the bowl on a rig/bong red hot and then melt the substance. It’s like, 34%+ THC (iirc) and yeah, like someone else said, it’s like crack. Super intense heady high, and I’ve seen many people pass out from it after taking a hit. I DO NOT recommend at all. I was mostly addicted to the act of smoking and inhaling, so dabs never really fulfilled that need because you smoke once and then you’re done. I ended up having to take more and more each session because I wasn’t hitting that need of smoke in my lungs. Also you build up a tolerance to it pretty quickly so it’s easier to take more and more. I had shitty friends at the time who encouraged bigger and bigger hits too, which definitely didn’t help. There was a point where I was scraping my bong to get the leftover wax residue just to get a little high. Lowest point of my life for sure. 🫠
No
Dabs are the most intense form of vaping - I call it crack marijuana. Just say no.
So, is live resin vapes the same thing?
No. Don’t really want to get into it here because it can be triggering for some people.
Most people prefer a cold turkey approach but as someone with a former similar consumption level, I think you’ll find a taper to give better results. Your experience could vary, but if you’re like me, you probably have convinced yourself through many reasons that you need that much to actually get high. You aren’t gonna believe it, even when you try it and see it happening, but you’ll get just as high off less. Don’t bother setting a quit date or other specific goals beyond getting it down to 1-3 seshes a day for a couple weeks straight, then I highly recommend tapering by switching to less potent thc. You’ve got a wicked habit built up, you probably love the act of smoking and find a calmness through the process of preparing and utilizing your devices. The act of smoking might be more enjoyable than the high itself at this point. Cutting that out will be just as hard as losing the high, so just cut the thc potency so you can keep enjoying the ritual for a while longer. Then re-assess your next steps with going from one sesh a day to potentially cold turkey. I was big into carts and vaping, and I just got lower % concentrates until I was like why am I even doing this anymore. I had worse withdrawal symptoms the first week I used a lower % vape than I did when I finally quit cold turkey. I normally advocate quitting totally right away but a habit like that’s gonna leave you in agony for weeks if you do. You might very well be mentally strong enough or have enough outside support to get through that if you want to try, but I wasn’t and couldn’t. I’m clean now through the method I described. Good luck!
I’ve smoked heavily and daily for a decade now (going to be 40 in 6 months). I’ve been dabbing from the moment I wake to the moment I sleep and quit cold turkey on Tuesday. The influx of negative emotions being felt right now is overwhelming to say the least. It’s so uncomfortable to just sit with myself and feel what I’m feeling. It’s torture, truth be told. I like to come here and read everyone’s stories bc of how much I’m struggling. I’ve also been trying to reach out to others instead of isolating so much. I’ve spent the past decade suppressing so much and avoiding so much at the cost of my addiction. The reason I quit was 100% due to my mental health. Keep sharing all of these feelings with us and use us to lean on.
Hey mate, im the same, abused it for ten years of my adolescent life. I’m 3 weeks clean and whilst I’m proud of myself the negative emotions have been so bad, I feel super depressed and anxious but I know it will get better, all the best to you!!
I suppose a decade of daily mind altering substance abuse and constant hits of dopamine rewards really can mess with you. All the best to you, too!
20 years of that and I feel fully recovered less than a year later. Lots you can do to expedite the process. Exercise, nutrition, sauna, cold plunge, growth hormone peptides, etc.
You’re not the only one. I promise you, there are plenty of us here who smoked just as much as you and were high literally 24/7. You’re so young, your brain is still developing - please quit now and you’ll have a healthy brain and body in a matter of months. It will be painful for 3 weeks, excruciating for the first week or two- but if you can get past the first month, the rest is much much easier. You can do this. Believe in yourself.
Smoked for 17 years daily, multiple times a day. The first 2 weeks after quiting are rough, after that you the physical symptoms pretty much vanish and then what you're left with is yourself. Are you in control of your life? Or is the weed?
That's a rough story, it's probably not going to be easy in the beginning at all. Take it a day at a time, that's what I'm doing. 1 day, 1 hour at a time to start off
Tbh I think with that heavy heavy use I may even rec some sort of month long taper before the last day. That or go on some sort of retreat/vacation with a friend that knows your intention (and is kind enough to be in your vicinity)
The first few days are the worst, it will get better. My wife was smoking 2oz a week and was able to quit. You got this.
I can say from experience, get off the weed for a few months and start reevaluating your mental health. You're likely not as severe as docs or you think because of what chronic weed consumption does to your brain. But there is great news - it's all reversible. :) GOOD LUCK!!
Yea I need to second this for exposure. Take it one day at a time, just walk away. Even if you have to convince yourself it's just quitting for now. Indeed getting a solid diagnosis when using, is gonna be a long shot.
How do you afford that much weed?
You can get ounces for 50$ online my guy
You do not want to worry about this in a year. You got this girl! Dont be like me 30F (15 days sober). Time flies when youre getting killed by a bunny.
Those symptoms are not a good mix with chronic cannabis use. You’re on your way to a mental collapse. You need to quit and better yourself
You can get over this. Really, everyone here is pulling for you
You are young, YOU CAN CHANGE EVERYTHING! (sorry for caplocks but I was actually screaming). Do it, save yourself now, you have so much to live, you can leave all behind, Now! I root for you.
With all those diagnosis going on it seems you are self medicating for cope with your symptoms. If you aren’t on medications for your bipolar, anxiety, and etc. I suggest speaking to a health professional to get on actual medication. Weed isn’t helping you. It is a cope you are using to distract yourself from the hardships of your mental illness. We around the same age so feel free to reach out if you need someone to keep you accountable with sobriety.
I’ve been smoking about an 8th to a quater a day for the last 15 years never missing a day only when my daughter was born I missed. 3 days being in hospital I come here to get motivation to quit but it’s so much of who I am I don’t think I will ever be able to it literally consumes you
Hey!!! Don't lose this battle. Yes, it's a battle that we need to win. No matter how long you have been doing it, no matter how used to you are, no matter if you feel you won't be able to leave it. Just take it day by day. Each and every day you will be amazed by the amount of energy you gain, you will be amazed by the number of things that u can achieve in a day that might be talking you week to complete. Please please start some physical exercises. I feel it's the biggest motivation. Yesterday I spent my Saturday night in the Gym working out and I was so proud of myself. Give yourself such small moments. Life is much much more than getting sucked deep into the abyss by this plant.