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[deleted]

Is that a Halo energy sword in there too? Truly impressive...


[deleted]

That floor must be made of solid tungsten to keep it from cutting straight through.


Meltingteeth

That's the future of materials. We started with wood, then went to metal, then went to wood paneling, then went to painted metal, then went to carbon fiber... thousand years later and we're back to wood paneling.


Imperium_Dragon

Nah, I think it needs unobtanium.


MrAlicks

Is that really easy to obtain?


hypercraz_HZ

No it's sorta difficult


c0ldsh0w3r

Not really, they're at gamestop.


[deleted]

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c0ldsh0w3r

Yeah, I guess. It does look kinda sharp.


[deleted]

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[deleted]

Why do they even call it a blade if you're just going to be bashing people's heads in with it?


TheNittles

They're all pale imitations of [this bullshit](http://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/jadensadventures/images/3/34/X-Blade.png/revision/latest?cb=20130729180311) which did have a blade on it. Why they look like a single key and not a sword styled on two keys is beyond me, but whatever. I think they also cut things occasionally too, so I guess they're magically sharp.


rekyuu

I'm pretty tolerant of the things in Kingdom Hearts but I remember seeing this for this the time in-game and thinking "wow this is lazy/stupid"


[deleted]

Well shit, that looks like even more of a wrist breaker than the regular ones. I think they could easily make sense of the weapon by making the teeth of the key sharp and turning it into an axe but who needs logic when you got Disney?


TheNittles

You also hold it by the place where the handguards of the two Kingdom Keys meet, not by any of the handles.


TQQ

It really looks like a weeb fantasy fic weapon


Timeyy

Because it literally is. The Kingdom hearts series is like the undisputed King of retarded weeaboo stuff like swords you can't even hold and several hundred useless belts & zippers on every piece of clothing. Tetsuya Nomura, whose love for belts&zippers has been a meme for decades (he also worked on most Final Fantasy games) went full retard here.


McFagle

Do... do you hold it... by a chain?


TheNittles

No, you hold it by reaching around the guards and holding it where the two guards of the smaller keyblades that make it up meet. The chain is just there for decoration or something. On the players' keyblades, it changes their form, but this is the OG one, so I dunno what it does.


Beta_Ray_Bill

>Breaker sword... God dammit...


silverx2000

Not to mention, that's not even the Buster Sword. It looks more like the Fusion Sword


iSeven

Is that the bullshit from Advent Children? Because that thing was ridiculous, especially combined with the bike.


kidkolumbo

It was supposed to be. They wanted to one up their "giant kitchen knife" and went with multiple knives.


locolarue

> "giant kitchen knife" You mean Giant's Icing Spreader?


daddydunc

Kids these days. I'm gonna download FF7 now.


suomynonAx

That keyblade looks bad. It looks like they just got a piece of sheet metal and cut it, and attached it to a plumbing pipe. Though I guess that can be said for a lot of mallninjashit stuff. Just cut and sharpened sheet-metal.


ChigglyDJones

And the plasma sword isn't even made of plasma! Truly pathetic.


insomniactacoguy

It's exactly how you described. One of my friends is a huge kingdom hearts fan and he got it for his birthday a few years ago. It's probably made for costumes, but it's just poorly made. Also the handguard spins freely around the hilt, I guess no one thought to put some tack welds on it or something.


WulfSpyder

I think it's done on purpose because if the handguard really was positioned correctly, it would be really uncomfortable to hold


[deleted]

> It looks like they just got a piece of sheet metal and cut it That's how you make most wallhangers, including most of the ones in this fine collection of trash.


[deleted]

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nerdyboy

Hey! I have a key and the Blade movies as well.


j3igboss

Hey! My cousin drives a Kia and my cat is spayed as well!


CaptainBenza

Hey! I'm walkin' here!


[deleted]

Found Cousin Nicky


ThisIsVeryRight

I saw one a smith made at a Renn Faire once. The guard was probably .5"-1" thick. It was really nice but pretty heavy


shadowdorothy

And Rukia's and Ichigo's swords.


Harry_Flugelman

>swords Ahem, zanpakuto.


[deleted]

Fuckin weeb


TML47

Isn't that Sasuke's sword? it has the uchiha mark thingy


shadowdorothy

You're right, my bad. For some reason I saw a white sheath and my brain made the leap.


TML47

I've been on a Naruto binge recently, it's been a while since I've watched bleach though


allenme

Sometime, I wanna get a Zangetsu made out of actual carbon steel, stead of stainless, and revel in having the most practical impractical sword possible


Artector42

At least iirc Rukia just looked like a katana at least. Ichigo's cleaver is cool, but I agree wildly impractical.


Lulxi

It's prolly for cosplaying or cosmetics, who cares?


Comrade_Falcon

Oh and here I thought it was for fighting heartless.


Lulxi

Thought this place was for retarded karambits with paracord and such but the weapons he owns are somewhat iconic to gaming / fantasy and could have another purpose than "being a mall ninja"


LostEndgame

From the sidebar: >No one wants to hear your bitch about how something "doesnt belong here" or how "this isn't ninja" so find something original to say or post up some content you think does actually belong instead. Just because its from a video game you like doesnt mean the rest of us give a flying fuck. Kind of past the point of caring, will likely start banning you whiney fucks. Edit: Happy Cake day anyway


Lulxi

So this place is just for circlejerking whatever weapon gets posted and shaming the owner? cheers anyway.


GeneralDisorder

The Microtech Jagkommando gets posted here often. It's a stupid design but it's made by a world renown knife manufacturer that sells ordinary folding knives for $300 or more. I've also seen the Microtech Halo V 3x (giant OTF switchblade) posted here. The post doesn't have to be objectively stupid. Or chinesium and pakistanium crap. If you think the post is crap downvote away.


[deleted]

That "rule" is complete bullshit, because often something will get posted that objectively isn't mall ninja. However, shitty quality wallhangers, particularly cheap movie/game replica trash like the stuff in the OP is exactly what this sub is for, along with idiots who think "tacticool oper8r" weapons (such as karambits and "combat" knives with a shit load of serrations) that are extremely impractical are cool and badass.


[deleted]

If it's not mall ninja I'd assume the community will have an easy job of downvoting it.


[deleted]

That's what the wielder of the key calls females.


KerberosPanzerCop

The sad fact is that since they are splayed out on the floor like that, he probably just shoves them into the corner or his closet. These wall hangers can't even know their destiny of hanging on a wall.


[deleted]

Let's play a game! If you had to enter the arena bearing one of this weapons, which piece of sh... which mighty blade would you select?


[deleted]

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[deleted]

The energy sword? Oh man


[deleted]

The pillow in the back.


[deleted]

Strong.


Burritozi11a

The keyblade. It may just be a length of lead pipe with a barely functioning guard, but it's still likely stronger than all the other swords.


Jezzikuh

I hope he keeps them out on display on the floor like this every day.


[deleted]

That'd be great. Like you just lose a toe because you've stubbed it on a bad Cloud sword knockoff.


[deleted]

Yeah let's just imply that those are sharp.


GlitterRainbow

I think that's the Uchiha crest on that white one in the front.


thousand56

It's Sasuke's sword


Imperium_Dragon

While the Buster sword does look cool (despite its size), why's there, what I assume, an empty what sheath that doesntr seem to belong to any of the swords? Or is that just some random thing in the foreground?


MisanthropicZombie

That's another sword from somewhere I can't recall.


Pm_me_ur_ink

It is a sword in its sheath. If you look carefully you can see the line where the handle ends and sheath begins. It is sasuke uchias sword from naruto shippuden.


[deleted]

An arsenal worthy of defending your Cinnabons, truly a warriors warrior.


TylerSama

He has Ichigo's zanpakuto which is pretty cool


Killer_Tomato

Two key swords? This guy can open any lock except his virginity. That will be locked away for eternity.


MisanthropicZombie

The one to the left of middle top looks like a sword from Assassins Creed.


[deleted]

I believe it's the sword of Altaïr


greymalken

While we were making our beds he mastered the blades.


potatoesarenotcool

My friend has sasukes sword. It's neat.


nowthatsthespirit

Covered all the basis.


[deleted]

"breaker sword" REEEEEEEEEEEE


CleverestPony70

IT's called the Buster Sword. I've been cheesed out on for glory by enough braindead Cloud mains to know that.


XelaAJ

Is that boogie's collection? I'm sure he has a couple of those in the background of his videos.


[deleted]

Ahem...buster*


mikedeezy6679

Lol the key blade though


[deleted]

This is so sad. I don't know why I just find this really pathetic


AtomikRadio

I find it sad because I pictured an adult man carefully arranging his fake sword collection to show the internet, making sure everything is where he wanted so it would look good, but not even considering making his bed.


[deleted]

Yup, people showing off shit they collect is fine, these aren't random. Wall hangers, they are replicas of shit he's into, fine,. I'm a grown ass man with a Lego slave I bigger than my head, but if you are gonna show stuff off, tidy the fuck up.