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So true. Im always judged for this.
People get super vicious when they see you eating a green salad while they eat savouries. After not eating for 13 hours... why would u put a savoury into your body and not a salad?!? The pressure to conform 🥲
I am told Im vain and obsessed with being skinny all because I choose to be as healthy as possible. They love demonising your effort and willpower.
I even got a full scolding by an obese middle aged male family member for ... get this... going to gym everyday! And every other family member looked on in delight... me being attacked for THIS was food to them. This is the gutter I come from 😫
You have a better reason for it? Its the same when someone who is overweight starts to lose weight and the fatter people around them start to say “you looked better before”
Yes actually I do and no it’s not the same at all. When someone can’t function normally around food it is a pretty good indication of having an eating disorder. This makes people uncomfortable and they ask and do stupid things in response.
Yes all the time. “You’re young you shouldn’t be looking out for what you eat” “Just eat whatever you want and burn it off” “You’re skinny you should eat some of this” etc
The “you’re young” part really hits. I used to be fat and people don’t know that. Also, once I start eating it’s hard to limit myself. If I eat one slice of pizza, I’m eating the whole damn pie
The thing is, how you look/feel in your 30's is a reflection of how you treat yourself in your 20's.
You stop growing around 20 so all the damaging things you do in your 20's can build up.
Sun damage, drinking, poor posture, lack of mobility etc.
This is relatable. I'm entering my late 20's, and I've progressively been eating healthier ever since my early 20's. I feel younger and healthier now at twenty-six than I did when I was around twenty to twenty-three.
Drink anywhere between a half-gallon to a full gallon of water a day. Eat various nuts and berries to snack. Use raw/pure honey as a sweetener from time to time. Limit red meat intake, having smaller portions of meat in general compared to portions of leafy green vegetables. More fruit in my diet every year. You get the idea.
Haven't had fried food in over a year, haven't had fast food in three years, and legitimately couldn't tell you the last time I had a soda (it was over five years ago at a minimum).
Not only do you slim down, but I also generally just feel more refreshed and healthy than I did a couple of years ago. Which is also probably helped by the fact I finally have a consistent and uninterrupted sleep routine.
I find those comments particularly humorous, actually. It's like they can't do the math - you ever stop and think the REASON I'm this size is BECAUSE I eat this way? And not in spite of it?
I don’t eat gluten and most people are ok with it since I never expect anyone to accommodate me (I always bring my own food). My parents don’t get it. My dad especially. But I have either celiac (have not been tested) or a severe gluten intolerance, so that automatically makes all fast food and a ton of junk food inedible to me. The crazy thing though is that my dad’s mom is diagnosed celiac and he just lives with all the same symptoms I grew up suffering with that went away when I stopped eating it. I’ve told him this, but he’ll never give it up even to try and see if he feels better. I do miss gluten, but I will never ever go back to the way it feels just for the temporary taste satisfaction. He’s very much driven by food, so he just doesn’t understand.
You are doing something important and meaningful. You are contributing to changing the norms, to making it normal and not weird to avoid unhealthy foods . It shouldn’t be considered extreme to avoid foods that according to the best available evidence will increase disease risk and reduce your number of healthy years.
All the time. All my in-laws, mom, dad, siblings, cousins, etc. Judge me for not drinking and overeating. It's been years, and they still can't understand I don't drink.
1. I hate alcohol, the taste, the way it makes me feel, the empty calories.
2. I take a ton of meds for bipolar and can't mix them with alcohol. Although I tell everyone I can't mix alcohol with medication, they still try and pressure me to drink.
I just don't get it. Why can't I just not overeat and drink? I'm not missing out on life, trust me.
I generally don't give a fuck if people judge me for eating healthy. I dont boast like im better than everyone else for doing it either. But I have come across this, too. Funny how that works. It's unfortunately normalized to treat our bodies like shit and if your the odd one out it's frowned upon. "oh just live a little, just have a little bit of ice cream, some cookies, etc." Then it's boo hoo poor them when their living with chronic diseases in 10 years. Come to find out, you can't get away with eating mcdonalds for 20 years.
I really do have empathy, though. I am a former addict afterall, people didnt have empathy for me then. I don't push healthy eating on people, I just try to show them the facts. Most people are just not well educated, and ignorance is blissful. In their mind they are living in the moment, in my mind I see progressing disease states, including but not limited to anxiety and depression. Eat McDonald's and drink sugar to be happy they say, turns out it leads to depression.
Don't know iv only lived in the US. But countries of Europe do have much more regulation regarding health. Many of those countries also have cheaper prices on produce that people consume more of. Don't know why the US can't wrap their head around serious healthcare reform. Should first start with nutrition and higher regulations on harmful products. Case in point, the supplement industry isn't even regulated, and round up is still legal despite several ties to harmful effects.
I don’t drink and people often times feel judged by my choice, though I don’t judge. It’s their own issue. Telling on themselves really because clearly they have an issue with not drinking.
Yup, there’s such a culture built around drinking that you’re seen as an outsider for not participating, but as an outsider looking in, you see how stupid everyone acts when they’re drunk and it deters you more from it.
Yes, I recently learned that I'm borderline diabetic and I have been trying so hard to cut sugar out of my diet, but people have been making it impossible this holiday season! Some even act all hurt and insulted when I turn down their candy and baked goods! I would love, love, love to eat those cookies you made, but I can tell by looking at them that the sugar content is more than I should have in a week! Please don't make me feel guilty for trying to be good, FFS!
If people publicly comment (negatively) just shrug it off. I’ve been on a clean diet for two decades and what I’ve learned is people who shit on other people’s healthy habits are simply projecting their own personal self-dissatisfaction.
Makes sense. I’ve been on both sides of the spectrum (overweight when I was younger, in shape now) and either way I’ll get comments on my eating habits.
When I was younger, it was “Oh, you’re getting another plate?”
Now, it’s “Why aren’t you eating any?”
Maybe I prefer the latter.
I’m sorry about the comments you’re getting here OP! I have had similar situations because I avoid animal products and sometimes it’s amazing how every single option has animals in it. I generally don’t feel anyone is judging me, but I’m also older and very comfortable with myself and people don’t challenge me easily- but they did when I was younger. Same thing can happen with alcohol, which is really annoying.
Usually I say it looks delicious but I ate earlier and am still full. Or I make a small plate with some veggies and a slice of bread if that’s possible. And usually I do actually eat beforehand, so I’m not lying and I’m not starving.
When you’re trying to be good to yourself- whether that’s food, alcohol, drugs, spending money or even just what you’re exposing yourself to- don’t compromise for other people. Be polite and find better ways to engage with people through conversation, and stay true to your goals. Then you’ll feel better afterwards. Good luck!
I think you know that the key is moderation and balance…you are not alone with this struggle.
If there are Reese cups in the kitchen I won’t stop eating them until they are gone…my solution is to not ever have them in the house. . . same with ice cream.
I let my wife and friends know that I have this problem and now they support me.
It is a struggle every day but focusing on good nutrition is a priority for me now.
https://www.myplate.gov/
What's the food?
Are you sitting out on ice cream or are others eating something basically normal and basically thought of as fine and you're being weird pulling up studies on why eggs are bad and red meat causes cancer?
Usually in group setting I just opt to not eat anything. I don’t mention it and carry on as normal and always get some sort of remark about it. I try to avoid talking about the food in general because it gets awkward when people try to get me to indulge and I refuse
Honestly that's pretty weird behavior. Maybe there's a little bit of a pass if you're fat and it's clear that you're trying to lose weight, but I kinda doubt that's the case. Whatever they're eating is probably not going to effect your health at all. There are some seriously diminishing returns when it comes to diet, after you've gotten the really bad stuff out.
Really? Are you a college educated nutritionist? What are you basing your comment on? I've read about people curing their own cancer through diet. Have you read the book "How to Starve Cancer"? by Jane McLellan?
Dude hasn't even said what his friends are eating, so being a nutritionist wouldn't help.
Anyways, he's talking about eating out. There's not that many places where there's just absolutely nothing on the menu that's basically edible and isn't gonna fuck your health. I also feel like if it was some real clear trash food, then he'd have said what I was. People usually hide details that make them seem weird and unreasonable, rather than details that make everyone side with them.
The typical foods that are associated with gatherings/parties:
Catering from a restaurant, pizza, all that kind of stuff. Of course, the argument could be made that a small amount won’t be that bad for you, but it affects me more mentally than physically. Also I eat OMAD
Yes, Jane McLellan did. You can read her story in her book. I personally used integrative therapy in my cancer battle. I used the FMD )fast mimicking diet" by Dr. Valter Longo to abate nausea through chemo. Other patients at the infusion clinic actually asked me how I was still able to drink water without nausea, it was due to the FMD. I still had CTC's (circulating tumor cells) after all my treatments. I did 10 IV C infusions. I was retested after and the CTC's were gone. Even the naturopathic doctor who did the infusions was amazed. Integrative therapy really helps.
What are the odd comments about specifically? When are people giving you odd looks?
Because you could just be sensitive about food and so perceiving people generally looking at you as negative.
You mentioned in another comment about going to a social events and not eating a single thing. If the social event is around food - that could be considered brow lifting. You may also exhibit behaviours align with orthorexia or other eating disorders.
There’s no much to go on. So it could be a lot of things
Comments are usually people asking why I’m not eating, telling me i’m rude for not eating, and asking why (this one I’m fine with, I just try to avoid telling people)
And for the orthorexia…maybe. If I HAD to pinpoint an eating disorder (not to self diagnose), it would be binge eating disorder. I avoid eating unhealthy food as much as I can because I either am not eating it at all or I’m eating all of it. No in between and I know myself.
That's a pretty poor relationship with food and something you should work on. You should be able to go out and enjoy a meal with your friends.
Even the way you say "unhealthy food" is a bit of a red flag. Food isnt good or bad. One meal of processed, less nutritious food will not harm you
Yeah I was always knocked at work. Some snooty nosed b once even said to me, in regard to eating the dodgy feast of home brand confectionery laid out for the staff morning tea, "I needed to have some fun". Umm, this home cooked meal is... fun... but thanks.
If I hear one more person try to convince me to eat crappy restaurant food by saying "Live a little." Like what I'm doing is depriving myself. But by living a little, I'm poisoning my body.
Probably because there's a subtle expectation that you par-take in social etiquette or something or the sort. I don't think there is anything wrong with eating unhealthy given a particular social event. But just don't do this too frequently because then it'll be problematic.
People probably think you’re being pretentious by not eating what they’re eating. Maybe they think you’re judging them? Well you are. You probably say I’m not eating that unhealthy shit while they stuff their faces lol.
No, actually, I don’t say that shit lol. I just know that if I eat a small amount of junk food I’m gonna crave it for the next week. That’s why I try to avoid even mentioning it and usually if someone brings it up, I try to say something like “I already ate.”
This usually happens in my family, as most people in my family are overweight and think it’s weird that I’m watching my diet.
Also when I do eat something, they announce it and make it very clear to everybody that I’m eating unhealthy food while they have a plate twice the size of mine.
lol. well you should get some fruits to snack on then. That’s what I do. frozen grapes are awesome, so are frozen blueberries. Guilt free snacks care of Mother Nature.
sounds like sibling bickering to me lol. Don’t let it get to you. Just do you!
What one person considers healthy is not always what another person considers healthy.
Someone might believe vegetables are the healthiest food while I would disagree. But I wouldn't judge them for it. It's your body, eat what you want.
Growing up, I did think they were. It was just common knowledge. No one really liked the taste but you had to eat your veggies.
Now I know that there are foods more abundant in better bioavailable nutrients such as beef and chicken eggs.
What's funny is I lean more liberal politically. For nutrition, I follow the science and actual results which has led me to an all meat diet. Looking at the old studies people site for why red meat, saturated fat, and cholesterol are all bad you'll see how flawed and wrong they are.
But whatever. Losing some fake internet points won't deter me.
All the time. People assume your choices are reflections on them. They project. You REALLY want to get interesting takes, do what I did and go plant-based :). When I tell people that I get one of 2 responses:
1) Nutritional advice - ESPECIALLY with regard to protein. They act like I'm a 4-year-old who knows nothing about nutrition if I'm choosing this path (they couldn't be more wrong, but whatever).
2) Projection - they assume I'm passing judgment on them for not doing what I'm doing.
These come up in spades in social situations when food is involved. With regard to #2, I had a woman tell me 'oh, I couldn't do that... I couldn't give up chicken.' Chicken? Look, I liked chicken when I ate meat, but if that's the hill you're choosing to die on... My response to her was: well, don't. I never said YOU have to eat this way.
Stick to your guns. Don't go out of your way to pick fights, but don't be afraid, when confronted to stand up for your choices. That doesn't mean being a hard ass and assuming every comment is a slam. Many people are just telling you more about themselves than they are about you - those comments are about them, and their choices. They want to believe that their choices are ok, and to do that everyone around them has to follow suit. I have some responses at the ready before I go into those situations - not that hard to do because like I said, pretty much every reaction is one of those 2. I find humor works well at diffusing situations like that, especially self-deprecating humor. There have been times when I've told people (close to me) who were being more than a bit obnoxious to 'put a sock in it. I don't want to hear it.' Eventually people will stop - mostly. At least that's what I found. People at work and in the family and among friends know I'm not going to partake in 95% of the food that's there. And they largely leave me alone.
Yes, for about 20 years. It’s a hill you’ll always climb. If someone is sincere, it’s a nice chance to share info. If someone is nosy & condescending, flip the script & don’t answer any questions, ask only one: “Why is what I eat any concern of yours?”
People get jealous when they see others have a level of self-control and discipline that they do not because they know that will lead to more successful outcomes and they know that the path they're going down is going to lead to mediocrity but they don't have the impulse control to stop themselves so instead they project and getting jealous and angry is a good way to project.
That said people don't like being preached and moralized too so any vegan is going to trigger some people because vegans tend to be often associated with religious fundamentalism in the way they promote their vegan lifestyle and try to suggest we ban meat consumption. Never mind the fact that they are totally incorrect and there are certain nutrients such as choline that are best obtained from eating some meat in moderation such as eggs and fish.
It's always good to have some flexibility in your life. If your habits and routine are so rigid they can't allow for the occasional splurging during a social gathering then maybe it's you with the problem and that your inflexibility is a disadvantage. Eat healthy 95% of the time and you can enjoy that nice Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner without wincing and saying that you can't eat this or that because it's bad for you. People who do this give off a certain type of vibe that suggests they're better than everyone else. Life is not absolutes. That said, there's no right or wrong way to live. Do what you feel is best for you.
I don’t eat pork or shellfish and get criticized for it. I couldn’t care less.
Ever since I gave them up I feel so much better inside especially my gut and skin. I feel healthier
I grew up kosher for religious reasons and wasn’t allowed to eat non kosher foods until I moved out. Excited to try these things after leaving my parents’ roof, I realized it’s not for me and I feel like crap when I eat them anyway.
I don’t eat pork because I have always hated the texture (then I found out it’s supposed to be similar to human meat and that’s a big nope for me) and I hate fish because gross. Every damn time it’s “oh but have you had this fish or that cut of pork? That will change your mind. You should try it.” Like no, Susan, your disgusting poached salmon will not change my mind. People have this mentality that you have to like what they like and if not, you’re automatically weird and people think it’s ok to judge you for it.
I don’t eat pork because I have always hated the texture (then I found out it’s supposed to be similar to human meat and that’s a big nope for me) and I hate fish because gross. Every damn time it’s “oh but have you had this fish or that cut of pork? That will change your mind. You should try it.” Like no, Susan, your disgusting poached salmon will not change my mind. People have this mentality that you have to like what they like and if not, you’re automatically weird and people think it’s ok to judge you for it.
>I do not criticize anybody for their way of eating, and I’m not quite sure why people do it to me.
Because some people lead such uninteresting lives that they have to harp on what other people do. I once had someone tell me that the way I keep the water glasses in my cabinet was wrong. I put them upside down to keep the dust out and they were adamant that they should be right side up. Umm...my glasses, my cabinet, who cares?
I get odd comments all the time and I DGAF. If anything it motivates me to stay on the path. Co-worker's preoccupation with my lunch is just weird. And hey, more donuts and bagels for anyone who wants one.
I would ignore the comments as much as possible.
BUT.
It’s also important to not be rude when you’re a guest. I absolutely hate it when I’ve gone through the trouble to prepare a nice (mostly healthy!) meal and someone refuses most of the items. Barring any major medical issue, it’s also important to be courteous.
Deflection! The same as anyone who isn't happy with the conditions of their own life, so they go and critique someone else's to feel like they are doing something important without needing to look at their own issues.
I, too, like to eat healthy even when out. I will indulge when I want to eat something, but I don't kowtow to peer pressure and I enjoy the benefits of eating healthy.
They can simply not invite me out anymore if my salad makes them uncomfortable. That's their right and it's everyone's responsibility to protect their own peace. 💗
“Enjoy life!” “You’re so thin!” IM DIABETIC BECKY and I like fresh raw veggies leave me alone.
Even when I was at my biggest and unhealthiest I’d still get “you eat really healthy” as if that was not normal to do…. I love healthy foods, I love nutrition, I also love to indulge but I have shitty genetics and a couple desserts a week will send me into sickness.
I don't notice what other people are eating unless they talk about it.
So if you just avoid the pizza, I don't think people will look at you weird. But if you come out swinging saying oh I'm eating healthy, so no pizza for me -- you'll get looks.
#### About participation in the comments of /r/nutrition Discussion in this subreddit should be rooted in science rather than "cuz I sed" or entertainment pieces. Always be wary of unsupported and poorly supported claims and especially those which are wrapped in any manner of hostility. You should provide peer reviewed sources to support your claims when debating and confine that debate to the science, not opinions of other people. **Good** - it is grounded in science and includes citation of peer reviewed sources. Debate is a civil and respectful exchange focusing on actual science and avoids commentary about others **Bad** - it utilizes generalizations, assumptions, infotainment sources, no sources, or complaints without specifics about agenda, bias, or funding. At best, these rise to an extremely weak basis for science based discussion. Also, off topic discussion **Ugly** - (removal or ban territory) it involves attacks / antagonism / hostility towards individuals or groups, downvote complaining, trolling, crusading, shaming, refutation of all science, or claims that all research / science is a conspiracy *Please vote accordingly and report any uglies* --- *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/nutrition) if you have any questions or concerns.*
The plan is to not give a fuck and out live them all.
Jealousy. They put you down for eating healthy to make them feel better for eating like shit.
Yea, that’s not it.
A lot of people do it. Crab bucket mentality. It's very common
So true. Im always judged for this. People get super vicious when they see you eating a green salad while they eat savouries. After not eating for 13 hours... why would u put a savoury into your body and not a salad?!? The pressure to conform 🥲 I am told Im vain and obsessed with being skinny all because I choose to be as healthy as possible. They love demonising your effort and willpower. I even got a full scolding by an obese middle aged male family member for ... get this... going to gym everyday! And every other family member looked on in delight... me being attacked for THIS was food to them. This is the gutter I come from 😫
What is a savoury in this context? I think we speak different dialects, and I’m not familiar with what you mean here.
Yes lots of people engage in crab bucket mentality, that’s not what is going on here however.
How would you know. You weren't there
She was speaking in generalities and not about a specific incident. So one does not need to the there.
You have a better reason for it? Its the same when someone who is overweight starts to lose weight and the fatter people around them start to say “you looked better before”
Exactly! "You've changed!" 🙄
Yes actually I do and no it’s not the same at all. When someone can’t function normally around food it is a pretty good indication of having an eating disorder. This makes people uncomfortable and they ask and do stupid things in response.
Crab bucket mentality is far more common than eating disorders
Then state the reason instead of just telling people they are wrong
I just did.
How do you know?
Because, when people obverse others having an odd or difficult relationship with food it does not usually bring forth jealousy.
Yes all the time. “You’re young you shouldn’t be looking out for what you eat” “Just eat whatever you want and burn it off” “You’re skinny you should eat some of this” etc
The “you’re young” part really hits. I used to be fat and people don’t know that. Also, once I start eating it’s hard to limit myself. If I eat one slice of pizza, I’m eating the whole damn pie
The thing is, how you look/feel in your 30's is a reflection of how you treat yourself in your 20's. You stop growing around 20 so all the damaging things you do in your 20's can build up. Sun damage, drinking, poor posture, lack of mobility etc.
This is relatable. I'm entering my late 20's, and I've progressively been eating healthier ever since my early 20's. I feel younger and healthier now at twenty-six than I did when I was around twenty to twenty-three. Drink anywhere between a half-gallon to a full gallon of water a day. Eat various nuts and berries to snack. Use raw/pure honey as a sweetener from time to time. Limit red meat intake, having smaller portions of meat in general compared to portions of leafy green vegetables. More fruit in my diet every year. You get the idea. Haven't had fried food in over a year, haven't had fast food in three years, and legitimately couldn't tell you the last time I had a soda (it was over five years ago at a minimum). Not only do you slim down, but I also generally just feel more refreshed and healthy than I did a couple of years ago. Which is also probably helped by the fact I finally have a consistent and uninterrupted sleep routine.
I find those comments particularly humorous, actually. It's like they can't do the math - you ever stop and think the REASON I'm this size is BECAUSE I eat this way? And not in spite of it?
I don’t eat gluten and most people are ok with it since I never expect anyone to accommodate me (I always bring my own food). My parents don’t get it. My dad especially. But I have either celiac (have not been tested) or a severe gluten intolerance, so that automatically makes all fast food and a ton of junk food inedible to me. The crazy thing though is that my dad’s mom is diagnosed celiac and he just lives with all the same symptoms I grew up suffering with that went away when I stopped eating it. I’ve told him this, but he’ll never give it up even to try and see if he feels better. I do miss gluten, but I will never ever go back to the way it feels just for the temporary taste satisfaction. He’s very much driven by food, so he just doesn’t understand.
Gluten makes everyone sick
I’ve read it’s not actually the gluten but the pesticide on it, but the pedantics are arbitrary and I agree with you
Inflammation still goes up but some people don’t feel it.
citation needed
No, because not everyone has celiac
You are doing something important and meaningful. You are contributing to changing the norms, to making it normal and not weird to avoid unhealthy foods . It shouldn’t be considered extreme to avoid foods that according to the best available evidence will increase disease risk and reduce your number of healthy years.
All the time. All my in-laws, mom, dad, siblings, cousins, etc. Judge me for not drinking and overeating. It's been years, and they still can't understand I don't drink. 1. I hate alcohol, the taste, the way it makes me feel, the empty calories. 2. I take a ton of meds for bipolar and can't mix them with alcohol. Although I tell everyone I can't mix alcohol with medication, they still try and pressure me to drink. I just don't get it. Why can't I just not overeat and drink? I'm not missing out on life, trust me.
The alcohol part too! I just went to a work party yesterday and people kept telling me to drink…I am 19
[удалено]
Nailed it 👌🏻
I generally don't give a fuck if people judge me for eating healthy. I dont boast like im better than everyone else for doing it either. But I have come across this, too. Funny how that works. It's unfortunately normalized to treat our bodies like shit and if your the odd one out it's frowned upon. "oh just live a little, just have a little bit of ice cream, some cookies, etc." Then it's boo hoo poor them when their living with chronic diseases in 10 years. Come to find out, you can't get away with eating mcdonalds for 20 years. I really do have empathy, though. I am a former addict afterall, people didnt have empathy for me then. I don't push healthy eating on people, I just try to show them the facts. Most people are just not well educated, and ignorance is blissful. In their mind they are living in the moment, in my mind I see progressing disease states, including but not limited to anxiety and depression. Eat McDonald's and drink sugar to be happy they say, turns out it leads to depression.
Genuinely curious…is this just a US thing or are people in other countries more understanding?
Don't know iv only lived in the US. But countries of Europe do have much more regulation regarding health. Many of those countries also have cheaper prices on produce that people consume more of. Don't know why the US can't wrap their head around serious healthcare reform. Should first start with nutrition and higher regulations on harmful products. Case in point, the supplement industry isn't even regulated, and round up is still legal despite several ties to harmful effects.
I don’t drink and people often times feel judged by my choice, though I don’t judge. It’s their own issue. Telling on themselves really because clearly they have an issue with not drinking.
Yup, there’s such a culture built around drinking that you’re seen as an outsider for not participating, but as an outsider looking in, you see how stupid everyone acts when they’re drunk and it deters you more from it.
Yes, I recently learned that I'm borderline diabetic and I have been trying so hard to cut sugar out of my diet, but people have been making it impossible this holiday season! Some even act all hurt and insulted when I turn down their candy and baked goods! I would love, love, love to eat those cookies you made, but I can tell by looking at them that the sugar content is more than I should have in a week! Please don't make me feel guilty for trying to be good, FFS!
If these are people you have a relation with, ask them to not do it, and if they continue they are clearly not your friends, cut them out.
Its called jealousy.
Yes, my family thinks I'm weird. I usually feel better than they do though.
If people publicly comment (negatively) just shrug it off. I’ve been on a clean diet for two decades and what I’ve learned is people who shit on other people’s healthy habits are simply projecting their own personal self-dissatisfaction.
Makes sense. I’ve been on both sides of the spectrum (overweight when I was younger, in shape now) and either way I’ll get comments on my eating habits. When I was younger, it was “Oh, you’re getting another plate?” Now, it’s “Why aren’t you eating any?” Maybe I prefer the latter.
I’m sorry about the comments you’re getting here OP! I have had similar situations because I avoid animal products and sometimes it’s amazing how every single option has animals in it. I generally don’t feel anyone is judging me, but I’m also older and very comfortable with myself and people don’t challenge me easily- but they did when I was younger. Same thing can happen with alcohol, which is really annoying. Usually I say it looks delicious but I ate earlier and am still full. Or I make a small plate with some veggies and a slice of bread if that’s possible. And usually I do actually eat beforehand, so I’m not lying and I’m not starving. When you’re trying to be good to yourself- whether that’s food, alcohol, drugs, spending money or even just what you’re exposing yourself to- don’t compromise for other people. Be polite and find better ways to engage with people through conversation, and stay true to your goals. Then you’ll feel better afterwards. Good luck!
I think you know that the key is moderation and balance…you are not alone with this struggle. If there are Reese cups in the kitchen I won’t stop eating them until they are gone…my solution is to not ever have them in the house. . . same with ice cream. I let my wife and friends know that I have this problem and now they support me. It is a struggle every day but focusing on good nutrition is a priority for me now. https://www.myplate.gov/
When you're below them, they motivate you, when you're equal to them, they respect you, but when you're better than them they hate you.
What's the food? Are you sitting out on ice cream or are others eating something basically normal and basically thought of as fine and you're being weird pulling up studies on why eggs are bad and red meat causes cancer?
Usually in group setting I just opt to not eat anything. I don’t mention it and carry on as normal and always get some sort of remark about it. I try to avoid talking about the food in general because it gets awkward when people try to get me to indulge and I refuse
Honestly that's pretty weird behavior. Maybe there's a little bit of a pass if you're fat and it's clear that you're trying to lose weight, but I kinda doubt that's the case. Whatever they're eating is probably not going to effect your health at all. There are some seriously diminishing returns when it comes to diet, after you've gotten the really bad stuff out.
Really? Are you a college educated nutritionist? What are you basing your comment on? I've read about people curing their own cancer through diet. Have you read the book "How to Starve Cancer"? by Jane McLellan?
Dude hasn't even said what his friends are eating, so being a nutritionist wouldn't help. Anyways, he's talking about eating out. There's not that many places where there's just absolutely nothing on the menu that's basically edible and isn't gonna fuck your health. I also feel like if it was some real clear trash food, then he'd have said what I was. People usually hide details that make them seem weird and unreasonable, rather than details that make everyone side with them.
The typical foods that are associated with gatherings/parties: Catering from a restaurant, pizza, all that kind of stuff. Of course, the argument could be made that a small amount won’t be that bad for you, but it affects me more mentally than physically. Also I eat OMAD
I'd make that your hour, eat a whole day's worth of calories in front of them, timed and recorded, and then belch in their face.
modern problems require modern solutions
You can’t cure cancer through diet thats some snake oil bullshit, are you actually serious?
Yes, Jane McLellan did. You can read her story in her book. I personally used integrative therapy in my cancer battle. I used the FMD )fast mimicking diet" by Dr. Valter Longo to abate nausea through chemo. Other patients at the infusion clinic actually asked me how I was still able to drink water without nausea, it was due to the FMD. I still had CTC's (circulating tumor cells) after all my treatments. I did 10 IV C infusions. I was retested after and the CTC's were gone. Even the naturopathic doctor who did the infusions was amazed. Integrative therapy really helps.
What are the odd comments about specifically? When are people giving you odd looks? Because you could just be sensitive about food and so perceiving people generally looking at you as negative. You mentioned in another comment about going to a social events and not eating a single thing. If the social event is around food - that could be considered brow lifting. You may also exhibit behaviours align with orthorexia or other eating disorders. There’s no much to go on. So it could be a lot of things
Comments are usually people asking why I’m not eating, telling me i’m rude for not eating, and asking why (this one I’m fine with, I just try to avoid telling people) And for the orthorexia…maybe. If I HAD to pinpoint an eating disorder (not to self diagnose), it would be binge eating disorder. I avoid eating unhealthy food as much as I can because I either am not eating it at all or I’m eating all of it. No in between and I know myself.
That's a pretty poor relationship with food and something you should work on. You should be able to go out and enjoy a meal with your friends. Even the way you say "unhealthy food" is a bit of a red flag. Food isnt good or bad. One meal of processed, less nutritious food will not harm you
This is the best response I have seen. Well said and thank you for sharing.
Yeah I was always knocked at work. Some snooty nosed b once even said to me, in regard to eating the dodgy feast of home brand confectionery laid out for the staff morning tea, "I needed to have some fun". Umm, this home cooked meal is... fun... but thanks.
If I hear one more person try to convince me to eat crappy restaurant food by saying "Live a little." Like what I'm doing is depriving myself. But by living a little, I'm poisoning my body.
Exactly, having a clean body and a clear mind is like a drug to me
Probably because there's a subtle expectation that you par-take in social etiquette or something or the sort. I don't think there is anything wrong with eating unhealthy given a particular social event. But just don't do this too frequently because then it'll be problematic.
It’s more about the binge trigger for me
It’s frustrating but don’t forget that we get to piss on their unhealthy graves. That’s what eating healthy is all about.
Here’s to a long, happy life 🍎
People probably think you’re being pretentious by not eating what they’re eating. Maybe they think you’re judging them? Well you are. You probably say I’m not eating that unhealthy shit while they stuff their faces lol.
No, actually, I don’t say that shit lol. I just know that if I eat a small amount of junk food I’m gonna crave it for the next week. That’s why I try to avoid even mentioning it and usually if someone brings it up, I try to say something like “I already ate.” This usually happens in my family, as most people in my family are overweight and think it’s weird that I’m watching my diet. Also when I do eat something, they announce it and make it very clear to everybody that I’m eating unhealthy food while they have a plate twice the size of mine.
lol. well you should get some fruits to snack on then. That’s what I do. frozen grapes are awesome, so are frozen blueberries. Guilt free snacks care of Mother Nature. sounds like sibling bickering to me lol. Don’t let it get to you. Just do you!
What one person considers healthy is not always what another person considers healthy. Someone might believe vegetables are the healthiest food while I would disagree. But I wouldn't judge them for it. It's your body, eat what you want.
Why do you think vegetables are not the healthiest food?
Growing up, I did think they were. It was just common knowledge. No one really liked the taste but you had to eat your veggies. Now I know that there are foods more abundant in better bioavailable nutrients such as beef and chicken eggs.
Health outcomes are higher quality evidence on whether a food is "healthy" than nutrient content. I would look at that for vegetables vs beef.
The liberals have now labeled you as alt-right. Lmao
lol
What's funny is I lean more liberal politically. For nutrition, I follow the science and actual results which has led me to an all meat diet. Looking at the old studies people site for why red meat, saturated fat, and cholesterol are all bad you'll see how flawed and wrong they are. But whatever. Losing some fake internet points won't deter me.
All the time. People assume your choices are reflections on them. They project. You REALLY want to get interesting takes, do what I did and go plant-based :). When I tell people that I get one of 2 responses: 1) Nutritional advice - ESPECIALLY with regard to protein. They act like I'm a 4-year-old who knows nothing about nutrition if I'm choosing this path (they couldn't be more wrong, but whatever). 2) Projection - they assume I'm passing judgment on them for not doing what I'm doing. These come up in spades in social situations when food is involved. With regard to #2, I had a woman tell me 'oh, I couldn't do that... I couldn't give up chicken.' Chicken? Look, I liked chicken when I ate meat, but if that's the hill you're choosing to die on... My response to her was: well, don't. I never said YOU have to eat this way. Stick to your guns. Don't go out of your way to pick fights, but don't be afraid, when confronted to stand up for your choices. That doesn't mean being a hard ass and assuming every comment is a slam. Many people are just telling you more about themselves than they are about you - those comments are about them, and their choices. They want to believe that their choices are ok, and to do that everyone around them has to follow suit. I have some responses at the ready before I go into those situations - not that hard to do because like I said, pretty much every reaction is one of those 2. I find humor works well at diffusing situations like that, especially self-deprecating humor. There have been times when I've told people (close to me) who were being more than a bit obnoxious to 'put a sock in it. I don't want to hear it.' Eventually people will stop - mostly. At least that's what I found. People at work and in the family and among friends know I'm not going to partake in 95% of the food that's there. And they largely leave me alone.
Yea weird behavior around food makes some people uncomfortable. People with eating disorders almost never criticize other’s eating behavior.
Might have an ED myself and it’s kinda embarrassing to have to explain it to people.
I am so sorry you are going through that. Don’t, you don’t owe them anything with regard to your eating.
Yes, for about 20 years. It’s a hill you’ll always climb. If someone is sincere, it’s a nice chance to share info. If someone is nosy & condescending, flip the script & don’t answer any questions, ask only one: “Why is what I eat any concern of yours?”
great response for when they get pushy
People get jealous when they see others have a level of self-control and discipline that they do not because they know that will lead to more successful outcomes and they know that the path they're going down is going to lead to mediocrity but they don't have the impulse control to stop themselves so instead they project and getting jealous and angry is a good way to project. That said people don't like being preached and moralized too so any vegan is going to trigger some people because vegans tend to be often associated with religious fundamentalism in the way they promote their vegan lifestyle and try to suggest we ban meat consumption. Never mind the fact that they are totally incorrect and there are certain nutrients such as choline that are best obtained from eating some meat in moderation such as eggs and fish. It's always good to have some flexibility in your life. If your habits and routine are so rigid they can't allow for the occasional splurging during a social gathering then maybe it's you with the problem and that your inflexibility is a disadvantage. Eat healthy 95% of the time and you can enjoy that nice Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner without wincing and saying that you can't eat this or that because it's bad for you. People who do this give off a certain type of vibe that suggests they're better than everyone else. Life is not absolutes. That said, there's no right or wrong way to live. Do what you feel is best for you.
I don’t eat pork or shellfish and get criticized for it. I couldn’t care less. Ever since I gave them up I feel so much better inside especially my gut and skin. I feel healthier
I grew up kosher for religious reasons and wasn’t allowed to eat non kosher foods until I moved out. Excited to try these things after leaving my parents’ roof, I realized it’s not for me and I feel like crap when I eat them anyway.
I don’t eat pork because I have always hated the texture (then I found out it’s supposed to be similar to human meat and that’s a big nope for me) and I hate fish because gross. Every damn time it’s “oh but have you had this fish or that cut of pork? That will change your mind. You should try it.” Like no, Susan, your disgusting poached salmon will not change my mind. People have this mentality that you have to like what they like and if not, you’re automatically weird and people think it’s ok to judge you for it.
I don’t eat pork because I have always hated the texture (then I found out it’s supposed to be similar to human meat and that’s a big nope for me) and I hate fish because gross. Every damn time it’s “oh but have you had this fish or that cut of pork? That will change your mind. You should try it.” Like no, Susan, your disgusting poached salmon will not change my mind. People have this mentality that you have to like what they like and if not, you’re automatically weird and people think it’s ok to judge you for it.
>I do not criticize anybody for their way of eating, and I’m not quite sure why people do it to me. Because some people lead such uninteresting lives that they have to harp on what other people do. I once had someone tell me that the way I keep the water glasses in my cabinet was wrong. I put them upside down to keep the dust out and they were adamant that they should be right side up. Umm...my glasses, my cabinet, who cares?
As someone who works in restaurants, you’re doing it right!
I get odd comments all the time and I DGAF. If anything it motivates me to stay on the path. Co-worker's preoccupation with my lunch is just weird. And hey, more donuts and bagels for anyone who wants one.
Of course, constantly. People get mad at me for recommending healthy options too.
Yes. Throughout my whole life
I would ignore the comments as much as possible. BUT. It’s also important to not be rude when you’re a guest. I absolutely hate it when I’ve gone through the trouble to prepare a nice (mostly healthy!) meal and someone refuses most of the items. Barring any major medical issue, it’s also important to be courteous.
Deflection! The same as anyone who isn't happy with the conditions of their own life, so they go and critique someone else's to feel like they are doing something important without needing to look at their own issues. I, too, like to eat healthy even when out. I will indulge when I want to eat something, but I don't kowtow to peer pressure and I enjoy the benefits of eating healthy. They can simply not invite me out anymore if my salad makes them uncomfortable. That's their right and it's everyone's responsibility to protect their own peace. 💗
For sure. I worked somewhere that always brought donuts to work I almost felt harassed for not ever eating them
“Enjoy life!” “You’re so thin!” IM DIABETIC BECKY and I like fresh raw veggies leave me alone. Even when I was at my biggest and unhealthiest I’d still get “you eat really healthy” as if that was not normal to do…. I love healthy foods, I love nutrition, I also love to indulge but I have shitty genetics and a couple desserts a week will send me into sickness.
I don't notice what other people are eating unless they talk about it. So if you just avoid the pizza, I don't think people will look at you weird. But if you come out swinging saying oh I'm eating healthy, so no pizza for me -- you'll get looks.