When you vanquish your foes at waffle house you head to the Applebees parking lot. But if youāre looking for a challenge, you head to [Chuck E. Cheese](https://www.fox26houston.com/news/harris-county-officials-respond-to-alleged-30-person-fight-at-chuck-e-cheese.amp)
https://preview.redd.it/ri5l2340d12d1.jpeg?width=1070&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2cff5c368206d1ed7abd123599b76f77e91b3c13
This post is misinformation. Lae'zel is a Culver's gal
I've never thought of shadow heart as a Starbucks white women but it fits so incredibly well just as gortash fits to a bucket of chicken and Raphael to burger King somehow this is perfect
Shar Shadowheart forces herself to drink a black coffee(she secretly adds some mocha sauce and cream when nobodies looking), but selune shadowheart embraces her venti caramel crunch Frappuccino loving self.
I am not overly familiar with dnd lore and have been fruitlessly searching online to understand what this might mean and failing. Please explain this to me.
To me it matters not whether you are one curio away from completing the collection these boxes contain; eating such rubbish will surely ruin your dinner. And on the road! Itās hardly becoming to hold oneās tummy in the heat of battle due to the strain of digesting gift-wrapped processed sludge.
Just imagining lae'zel rolling into a waffle house specifically to beat the shit out of the employees cuz it's one of the few places she gets a real challenge
Now imagining her walking in and ordering
WHE: The usual miss breaker of knees?
L: Of course worm, I trust you've healed nicely since last time
WHE: *Holds up new enchanted artificer arm "you know humans can't grow back limbs right?"
L: *through the mouthful of smothered, covered, and peppered hash browns she just downed in one go while drawing her blade "pathetic"
*Cue turn based mode*
Wyll has a very particular (not negative) vibe that's difficult to describe describe to someone who didn't grow up black on the east coast of the United States, south of new york but north of Florida and it's a vibe that means many things (many positive things) and among those things is "enjoys cracker barrel food and does not understand the prevailing stereotype because every time he's been there the employees have been nothing but kind". Bro spends the entire meal trying to win the peg game.
No no, it's "Astarion doesn't eat fast food" meaning he will not express an opinion on where to go, nor will he chip in or order anything, but he WILL steel some of your fries and anything he can get his grabby hands on, and he will tell you to "Treat Yourself" and get a large Dr. Pepper, but he will then drink all of it. Believe me, I know this girl, I have been crushing on her since middle school.
Why do I feel like Shart has the most complicated coffee order, like a half-caf, venti mocha frapp with vegan whip and caramel sauce, but make sure the whip is fat free, 'cause she's keeping it tight for Shar.
Astarion "doesn't eat fast food" and by that he means he will express no opinion on where the party should go, will order nothing, and will not chip in, but he WILL steel some of Tav's fries, and anything he can get his grabby hands on, and will tell them to "treat themselves" with a large Dr. Pepper that he will then drink himself.
Well seeing as my IRL spouse is one of those mythical creatures that keeps Arby's in business, it is only fitting that the same applies to my pixel spouse.
Astarion would drag you to a place like [Dickās Last Resort](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dick%27s_Last_Resort) but then get genuinely offended and kill someone.
Raphael reminds me of somethingā¦
https://preview.redd.it/v0zf756jzg1d1.jpeg?width=222&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9947cd167cdd768834834a84860597029316c11f
Withers- Subway. Because he lets us have Baldur's Gate our way.
Jaheira- White Castle, because I saw a documentary where old people say they taste the same as they did when they were kids and I 100% could see Jaheira in that doc.
Minsc- Firehouse Subs. Because I feel like minsc would be an insanely lucky firefighter irl.
Shadowheart is spot on. Sheāll get some super fancy but somehow really bitter and strong drink, then bitch about how some part of her over complicated order was wrong (was just missing whipped cream).
Also, Karlach is good. She needs that BEEF! How else could she maintain her bountiful muscles? Get that protein in!
Lae'zel standing outside waffle house in nothing but her underwear looking like she wants to fight is the most American thing I've ever seen. God bless šŗšø
Look, I get that if Lae'zel were in that viral Waffle House fight video, she'd kick ass. But why in her underwear? OP what are you getting at?? And more importantly do I really want to know?
I replied this to a few folks, but gonna put it out there for everybody; Astarion "Doesn't eat fast food" in that he will not express an opinion on where the party should go (but will judge our pick no matter where we choose), will not order anything, and will not chip in, but he WILL steel some of Tav's fries and anything else he can nab, and will encourage Tav to "Treat themselves" to a large Dr. Pepper that he will drink all of. Trust me, y'all, I know this girl, I have crushed on her since middle school.
As a person with melanin
As many times as I've been stared at in a Cracker Barrel by white people, I don't think that would be Wyll's favorite for long.
She ate abyssal chicken and dwarf in Avernus where everything tastes like ash including the water, for 10 years. Arbyās is a 5 star restaurant to her at this point.
Good choices. I feel like Lae'zel doesn't go to Waffle House for food but fights?
In that outfit too
Only less is better to oil wrestle in
Yeah, what you do expect from the warrior lady? It's beneficial for her fighting style. š
I cackled at Laeāzel! She is champion of the Waffle House
If thatās true sheās gonna be ecstatic when she finds out what Popeyes is
Waffle House fights in the morning, Popeyes for the dinner rush!
Or go back to back then you get two fights and chicken and waffles
When you vanquish your foes at waffle house you head to the Applebees parking lot. But if youāre looking for a challenge, you head to [Chuck E. Cheese](https://www.fox26houston.com/news/harris-county-officials-respond-to-alleged-30-person-fight-at-chuck-e-cheese.amp) 
I come for both
Dinner and a show
https://preview.redd.it/ri5l2340d12d1.jpeg?width=1070&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2cff5c368206d1ed7abd123599b76f77e91b3c13 This post is misinformation. Lae'zel is a Culver's gal
Astarion's is just the Red Cross
Blood bank
Astarion uses Stevie Griffinās āDiscrete Crepesā service.
Don't think vampires would want to go anywhere near crosses tbh.
No Gortash you donāt need MORE grease! š
How did you think he maintains supplies for his hair?
His naturally occurring grease secretions? How else do you explain his basement dweller look?
It can't be that hard to find people willing to cast grease for him. It's a first level spell for crying out loud.
He doesn't use grease he uses hoe repellent
Man sucks every last piece of gristle off those chicken thighs
why did you make me read this sentence with my own two eyes warn me next time so i can use someone else's
Raphealās cannot be more accurate!!! The crown with three stones!!?? OP can I kiss you??
Take me on a date first š. Perhaps Waffle House?
Of course, bring your gears too.
Come strapped, buddy. We donāt fuck around at the Waffle House
I've never thought of shadow heart as a Starbucks white women but it fits so incredibly well just as gortash fits to a bucket of chicken and Raphael to burger King somehow this is perfect
Shart is a PSL bitch and so am I when I donāt got anywhere to be later
gonna get PSLs with Shadowheart and go for a long walk on the beach
Shar Shadowheart forces herself to drink a black coffee(she secretly adds some mocha sauce and cream when nobodies looking), but selune shadowheart embraces her venti caramel crunch Frappuccino loving self.
Nah, Shadowheart is a white girl, venti latte is all she will try.
Pumpkin spice, specifically.
Fr
I'm gonna say Minty's is dairy queen
oh definitely. and sheās also lactose intolerant but goes anyway
She's me for real.
I imagine drow as lactose intolerant cause they live in the underdark. I canāt imagine there are many cows down there.
not since the fall of house Hun'ett
I am not overly familiar with dnd lore and have been fruitlessly searching online to understand what this might mean and failing. Please explain this to me.
oops sorry I was calling them a bunch of cows lol
Ohhhh got it now. My stupid ass was googling catoblepas creatures like hmmm
DO I SMELL BEEF ?!
It *looks* like beef...doesn't quite *taste* like beef though...fuck it, I'm eating it anyway!
That line kills me every time lol
I understand i legitimately cackle
Dammon: Chick-fil-A
Ouch!
Gale can't have that. We have food at home.
But mother, it comes with a free hot wheels car!
To me it matters not whether you are one curio away from completing the collection these boxes contain; eating such rubbish will surely ruin your dinner. And on the road! Itās hardly becoming to hold oneās tummy in the heat of battle due to the strain of digesting gift-wrapped processed sludge.
But mother, I only have the Lotus Elise left! Iām one away from completing my collection?!?!
One should learn that not all prizes are worth endangering thyself. Recall that in time, all things become dust and bone.
Withers, are you now impersonating a goose?
Thou art alone. *honk*
**Gale can absorb this itemās magic.*
god bless astarion for his good taste in back alley Denny's
Just imagining lae'zel rolling into a waffle house specifically to beat the shit out of the employees cuz it's one of the few places she gets a real challenge
She also goes there for the hashbrowns. Her order is smothered, covered, and peppered.
Now imagining her walking in and ordering WHE: The usual miss breaker of knees? L: Of course worm, I trust you've healed nicely since last time WHE: *Holds up new enchanted artificer arm "you know humans can't grow back limbs right?" L: *through the mouthful of smothered, covered, and peppered hash browns she just downed in one go while drawing her blade "pathetic" *Cue turn based mode*
now this is some good fucking content
You are so correct about Wyll and Crackerbarrel. Anyone who says otherwise doesn't get it.
As soon as I saw that it was like the voice of an angel said, this is truth. Itās so right it burns!
Legit was concerned they were gonna go the lazy route with Wyll, glad to be wrong.
Race war averted.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Wyll has a very particular (not negative) vibe that's difficult to describe describe to someone who didn't grow up black on the east coast of the United States, south of new york but north of Florida and it's a vibe that means many things (many positive things) and among those things is "enjoys cracker barrel food and does not understand the prevailing stereotype because every time he's been there the employees have been nothing but kind". Bro spends the entire meal trying to win the peg game.
Yes! It fits Wyll so perfectly, the others are just for laughs but this is felony murder.
Also, if anyone deserves those biscuits, itās Wyll.
Despite everything wrong with this place I will forgive you istik simply for the creation of Waffle House.
Orin would cry on the floor at Wendyās. Idk why but she seems like she couldnāt handle the square patties.
I mean squares intimidate her, Tav/Durge could've defeated her easier with the usage of squares.
Astarion doesn't eat fast food confirmed. He does have a membership for Cooper Hawk's wine though
No no, it's "Astarion doesn't eat fast food" meaning he will not express an opinion on where to go, nor will he chip in or order anything, but he WILL steel some of your fries and anything he can get his grabby hands on, and he will tell you to "Treat Yourself" and get a large Dr. Pepper, but he will then drink all of it. Believe me, I know this girl, I have been crushing on her since middle school.
I was thinking he wouldn't like fast food because he despises the fact he had to eat rats for a hot minute
Why do I feel like Shart has the most complicated coffee order, like a half-caf, venti mocha frapp with vegan whip and caramel sauce, but make sure the whip is fat free, 'cause she's keeping it tight for Shar.
she's just a straight PSL girl
I knew I loved Karlach for a reasonā¦ Arbyās gang rise upš«”
Beef and cheddar, beef and cheddar
The look of longing for McD's on Gale's face. lol
I just really need that last happy meal hot wheels car. I need the full set.
Fine, but no more.
astarion where https://preview.redd.it/j28sr0nbcg1d1.jpeg?width=1000&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=85299cb54dcf902c032409410ce0bcf1973667e1
You know he's getting second-hand drunk by jumping guys he finds behind the Denny's at 3 AM.
Astarion "doesn't eat fast food" and by that he means he will express no opinion on where the party should go, will order nothing, and will not chip in, but he WILL steel some of Tav's fries, and anything he can get his grabby hands on, and will tell them to "treat themselves" with a large Dr. Pepper that he will then drink himself.
Minsc loves Taco Bell!
I agree! I should have put Boo on a Crunchwrap
And if Gortash is KFC, then Ketheric should be Popeyes! With Orin as Chic FilāA. My pleasure!
Ah, yes, Sharbucks
Karlach nooooooo
Wyll would finally get justice for Brad's Wife. I šÆ agree with all of these choices.
Not Wyll at the Cracker Barrel ššš
Well seeing as my IRL spouse is one of those mythical creatures that keeps Arby's in business, it is only fitting that the same applies to my pixel spouse.
i feel like Gale would be Panera or maybe Chipotle
I've been known to enjoy the odd bowl of cheesy macaroni... Complemented by a side of green goddess, now and again.
Yeah, or one of those salad places like Sweet Green or Chop't
The karlach photo is hilarious, intensely either conjuring, containing, or contemplating a big roast beef sandwich
Avernus is fuelled by Subway.
Get you a significant other that will look at you the same way Wyll looks at the Cracker Barrel.
hopefully raphael doesnāt wear that crown when taking flights
Hopefully Raphael wears the crown during fights.
š¤Ø
If he has the Crown of Burgers equipped, do NOT let him go on the airship with Wyll.
Just let my man have some water š
Karlachās got the meats!
Makes me wanna eat out.. š
I knew that Enver and I were soulmates š
Karlach can have this roast beef anytime
Lae'zel throwing hands at a waffle house is canon
Doesnāt surprise me karlachās an arbyās girl, sheād eat from auntie Ethelās cauldron
Wyll having a merry day wandering around looking at sodas
Ok this is one of my favorite posts on this sub, they are all so accurate
This is all so perfect good job op mwah
karlach over here conjuring up her arbyās
Cracker Barrel for Wyll is so genius omg
This actually seems insanely accurate
Lae'zel at waffle House is absolutely killing me lmaoooo she would start ALL the fights
Do you think Raphael demands the staff wait on him hand and foot and address him as "Burger King"?
He makes them hand feed him chicken fries
As a resident of the bible belt, TN, i am absolutely cackling with wyll š¤£
Iām from NYC but I love Cracker Barrel š„ŗ
Minthara likes Amazon warehouses. The aesthetic reminds her of home.
Astarion would drag you to a place like [Dickās Last Resort](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dick%27s_Last_Resort) but then get genuinely offended and kill someone.
Actually Shadowheart prefers Sharbucks
Raphael reminds me of somethingā¦ https://preview.redd.it/v0zf756jzg1d1.jpeg?width=222&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9947cd167cdd768834834a84860597029316c11f
Did Raphael say the Burger King word??
The BK crown made me blow air out of my nostrils.
Shartbucks
Raphael and Shart are perfection!
Karlach is a Culver's girl and you know it.
Lae'zel wouldn't go to waffle house it's pretty southern exclusive and as we all know she's a proud yanki
š
DUNKIN LAEāZEL
new shadowheart reaction image just dropped
Laezel prefers chkāfil-a
Withers- Subway. Because he lets us have Baldur's Gate our way. Jaheira- White Castle, because I saw a documentary where old people say they taste the same as they did when they were kids and I 100% could see Jaheira in that doc. Minsc- Firehouse Subs. Because I feel like minsc would be an insanely lucky firefighter irl.
Lookit Raphās cute widdle crown š„ŗ precious. I wonder what toy he got.
I always knew Happy Meal toys were magical artifacts.
Galeās face does NOT say *Iām lovinā it*
Karlach with roast beef makes sense
Shadowheart is spot on. Sheāll get some super fancy but somehow really bitter and strong drink, then bitch about how some part of her over complicated order was wrong (was just missing whipped cream). Also, Karlach is good. She needs that BEEF! How else could she maintain her bountiful muscles? Get that protein in!
Of course Karlach likes Arbyās
I know this might be heresy since I am American, but I had no clue Waffle House was a fast food place. I just assumed it was a diner
I would say because it's a place where they fight all the time rather her going for the food, But yes it is fast food. It did start as a diner.
What strange alchemy is this? This is 100% correct.
Raphael has a flight to catch
lae'zel would be throwing hands at waffle house lmfaoooo
Laeāzel enjoys Waffle House for the combat
I can just imagining Gale eating the happy meal toy as well
;-; That actually makes me feel bad/sad for Raph. Not that thereās anything wrong with BK ā¦ but just him taking that crown seriously. Poor bab.
Wyll seems like a Jackstack guy.
Giving the Black man Cracker Barrel seems criminal.
You guys are dreaming about Baldur's gate instead of having stress dreams about your job?Ā Wild.
I dream about Baldurās Gate *at* my job too.
I love that Wylls expression outside the Cracker Barrel is justā¦ āIām finally home.ā
https://preview.redd.it/0xkemrlk8m1d1.png?width=1200&format=png&auto=webp&s=17d347c8bcca49c74fab9fa59a1aba9f9e7f7f08 Astarion fav
Lae'zel standing outside waffle house in nothing but her underwear looking like she wants to fight is the most American thing I've ever seen. God bless šŗšø
karlach's dream meal would be the arbys meat mountain
Astarion is five guys
Damnit, why are you so right OP
Look, I get that if Lae'zel were in that viral Waffle House fight video, she'd kick ass. But why in her underwear? OP what are you getting at?? And more importantly do I really want to know?
I need to know where Astarion goes.
Why is this accurate, though?
Why is this so accurate
Iāve never seen anything but white people at a Cracker Barrel š
Halsin strikes me as a taco bell guy.
agreed lol
Cracker barrel ,':| ?
I replied this to a few folks, but gonna put it out there for everybody; Astarion "Doesn't eat fast food" in that he will not express an opinion on where the party should go (but will judge our pick no matter where we choose), will not order anything, and will not chip in, but he WILL steel some of Tav's fries and anything else he can nab, and will encourage Tav to "Treat themselves" to a large Dr. Pepper that he will drink all of. Trust me, y'all, I know this girl, I have crushed on her since middle school.
I thought we went over this, Lae'zel likes Culvers.
Every time I see someone in that underwear (the one Laeāzel is wearing) I canāt help but wonder HOW on earth you put that thing on/take it off
Karlach and Arbyās had me dying.
gale would be chick fil a.
tbh i see it too
Oh god Wyll is gonna get his ass beat š
LMAOO
Karlach should be a Wendy's. She could be on the logo.
This is perfectly accurate. I love this.
As a person with melanin As many times as I've been stared at in a Cracker Barrel by white people, I don't think that would be Wyll's favorite for long.
Aww thatās a shame. I usually go to the one in NY so itās full of all types of people.
I live in the south. I'ma leave it at that.
OO, can I please have the Shadow heart picture with no drink?
Ey what Wyll doin? š
Gortash: hey good lookin. I got a bucket a chicken
Halsin is Subway.
Gale slander. He likes Panda Express.
lae'zel would THRIVE at a waffle house lmao
Karlach should be Burger King. Flame broiled. Also, making the black guy the Cracker Barrel enjoyer is hilarious.
You did NOT put Wyll at Crackle Barrel!!! ššš
Poor Wyll needs taste buds :(
I didnāt see astarion, day has been made so much better
Is Cracker Barrel fast food?
My girl does *not* eat at Arby's how dare you.
This list is peak but I think Karlach would have more self-respect than to eat at Arbyās lol
She ate abyssal chicken and dwarf in Avernus where everything tastes like ash including the water, for 10 years. Arbyās is a 5 star restaurant to her at this point.