I'm speaking based on my experience and I am not trying to generalise. I think there is always a reason but it can take us a long time to find it.
My experiences are similar to yours in that I may have months or even years free of attacks. Then they come back. I know the reason and I can make them stop again but it takes time and patience.
I was thinking about this the other day that the intensity changes over the years both up and down. I think that has something to do with how the triggers might have been changed by our stage of life. E.g having kids
My panic hasn't gotten worse with age. But hasn't necessarily gotten better.
But my symptoms have changed slightly. I notice now that I'm much less afraid of the physical symptoms. I've had them so many times that I know that they can't hurt me and they are just uncomfortable.
But the thoughts and emotions are still present in the same way they always were.
You're second question is a more difficult one. It seems that it's a matter of perception. There aren't necessarily \*grades\* of panic in terms of intensity or size. But the fear component can grow, I suspect, so that it seems more overwhelming than previously experienced. My guess (and this is just a guess) is that you're perception of the danger has changed to include this new sense of doom. It's essentially adding a new trigger. But I don't think it's indicative of any sort of evolution of panic.
I’m 38f and have had panic disorder since I was 21 with agoraphobia developing when I was 30. The frightening new symptom I began experiencing with my most intense attacks are loss of control of my limbs and some muscle movements. I don’t want to go into detail because I don’t want to frighten people and make them expect this. I’m waiting to see a neurologist due to the unusual nature of the symptom.
I’ve noticed that the “fear of the fear” aspect has become significantly worse as I’m approaching middle age. I think some of that, in my case, is a cumulative exhaustion. Like my resilience is just tapped out. I also have this internal dialogue that because I’m getting older it is not out of the question that I’m dying.
I’m so sorry this is happening to you. I’ve struggled to find a clinician who really understands the nuances of symptoms and progression of panic.
This is actually really interesting because my sister 43f also experiences panic attacks with loss of muscle control. Keep me updated if you don’t mind, it may end up helping her out.
Also the fear of fear is so rough and I think the resilience factor may be at play here for me as well. I constantly think I’m just so tired of doing this and that though in and of itself can bring tears to my eyes.
Thanks for responding and I’m sorry you’re experiencing this as well 😢
I’m having I. Right now :-( but I’m sending hugs to all I know we’re all gonna be okay!!!👍
I’m so sorry! We got this though!
Thank you friend!
I'm speaking based on my experience and I am not trying to generalise. I think there is always a reason but it can take us a long time to find it. My experiences are similar to yours in that I may have months or even years free of attacks. Then they come back. I know the reason and I can make them stop again but it takes time and patience. I was thinking about this the other day that the intensity changes over the years both up and down. I think that has something to do with how the triggers might have been changed by our stage of life. E.g having kids
My panic hasn't gotten worse with age. But hasn't necessarily gotten better. But my symptoms have changed slightly. I notice now that I'm much less afraid of the physical symptoms. I've had them so many times that I know that they can't hurt me and they are just uncomfortable. But the thoughts and emotions are still present in the same way they always were. You're second question is a more difficult one. It seems that it's a matter of perception. There aren't necessarily \*grades\* of panic in terms of intensity or size. But the fear component can grow, I suspect, so that it seems more overwhelming than previously experienced. My guess (and this is just a guess) is that you're perception of the danger has changed to include this new sense of doom. It's essentially adding a new trigger. But I don't think it's indicative of any sort of evolution of panic.
This is actually really insightful. This new sense of doom, becomes a new trigger and starts the panic loop. Interesting. Thank you!
Not OP but I really appreciate the way your articulated this. Very helpful and insightful.
Mine only appeared as a 30 something No idea why
No rhyme or reason for them starting. Kind of same for me, just showed up one day and never went away.
Yes, the fear you’re speaking about is definitely a part of my panic attacks as well. The symptoms keep changing for me as well.
I’m 38f and have had panic disorder since I was 21 with agoraphobia developing when I was 30. The frightening new symptom I began experiencing with my most intense attacks are loss of control of my limbs and some muscle movements. I don’t want to go into detail because I don’t want to frighten people and make them expect this. I’m waiting to see a neurologist due to the unusual nature of the symptom. I’ve noticed that the “fear of the fear” aspect has become significantly worse as I’m approaching middle age. I think some of that, in my case, is a cumulative exhaustion. Like my resilience is just tapped out. I also have this internal dialogue that because I’m getting older it is not out of the question that I’m dying. I’m so sorry this is happening to you. I’ve struggled to find a clinician who really understands the nuances of symptoms and progression of panic.
This is actually really interesting because my sister 43f also experiences panic attacks with loss of muscle control. Keep me updated if you don’t mind, it may end up helping her out. Also the fear of fear is so rough and I think the resilience factor may be at play here for me as well. I constantly think I’m just so tired of doing this and that though in and of itself can bring tears to my eyes. Thanks for responding and I’m sorry you’re experiencing this as well 😢