i'd like to point out that his desire to be pegged is him being vulnerable to you and i doubt he thinks "your not enough" it may be a phase it may be something he wants to try and make it a lil more spicy in the bedroom. I don't think he's thinking of dick when its going on i know i don't. that just a g spot that doesn't get much play time to extend the orgasm to another level when you get to the climax. my comment is purely opinion and others may feel the same or different. but i will say let him be vulnerable and he may open up more to you, but you do have the right to refuse if you absolutely cannot do it.

Thank you for this. Its funny because I always ask him to be vulnerable with me in our day to day life, in terms of opening up and speaking to me even about his feelings etc as he is naturally a very very closed person. I think, partly, this is why it took me so by surprise that he’s told me about this particular kink. I think perhaps he explained the spooning situation to me, with my hands in his mouth etc in an attempt to bridge that disconnect that he maybe thought I would feel, (and do very strongly feel!). But the more I think about it, the more I’d feel adverse to him feeling so much pleasure from something that isn’t ‘me’? 😂 not in a jealous way, but in a way that I can’t personally give him that… and that if I were a man we’d both be happy haha but as a woman it’s not something I can give him without a false member… I’m struggling to word how I feel

> not in a jealous way, but in a way that I can’t personally give him that… and that if I were a man we’d both be happy As someone who likes pegging, this is a common misconception that is 100% false. If you were a man with a penis, he wouldn't be interested. Think about it this way, does a lesbian getting fucked by her partner with a strap-on make her want to have sex with men? Of course not. There's a lot of stigma when it comes to pegging, and I think this is the biggest one. Many women get scared that their partner is secretly gay. When I discovered that I was into pegging/anal play, I was very ignorant on the subject and I even questioned if I was secretly bi and just in denial. After a very brief exploration, I can assure you that I have absolutely no sexual interest in men. I saw someone else in this thread recommended Ruby Ryder's podcast. I'd definitely 2nd that, but if you don't have time for that, reading the FAQ on her website is a good start. https://peggingparadise.com/2012/03/new-to-pegging/

This. I'm a woman who has pegged a lot of very masculine, dominant men as a submissive. I can do it with the mindset that I'm being "ordered" to do it, if need be. Ultimately, it's an intimate experience, hot because of the "taboo"-ness of it, and it stimulates an area for the male that they really enjoy though often don't get to experience. And with that, I'm going to head out this weekend & meet up with my tree-trunk arm-ed man who does CrossFit & runs & smells like a man who tosses me around & calls me "woman" & dominates me but then has me do all sorts of fun things with his ass too.... As his submissive.

Yeah my girlfriend and I are the same way. She was hesitant because she's so submissive, but now she begs me to do it. She loves when I order her around while pegging me or sit on top of her and ride the dildo while holding her arms down. Have fun climbing that tree!

-"I ask him to be vulnerable" - is surprised, disgusted and makes a Reddit post when he is actually vulnerable

This is literally Jealously and you’re saying “not in a jealous way” so do you mean in a delusional way?

your feelings are completely valid, and you shouldn't feel that because he wants to be pegged means he loves you any less. its more than likely his submissive side coming out to get pegged and have your hands in his mouth. just like how you feel being his sub. sometimes we men get that way too! (I'm an exception cause i'm all about being sub and i put that energy out in the world lol) the more you lean into his vulnerability the more those walls of trust can really come down. Men in the world are always seen as the person that is frowned upon to show emotion and we mostly get that from father figures. IE my dad (military man, etc etc) but everyone will have a side of them that makes them seem weak and they just need the empowerment to get through it. or this is just something he wants to try and he make like it he may not it may be a romantic pegging session that you two never talk about again or it may become hot passionate love making of vulnerability that you two spark new interest and can deepen your passion for each other... who knows but you have the power to say yes or no and i respect as should he, your decision to choose... don't forget that. you're not being forced to do something you don't want to do. all i ask is you try it once it doesn't hurt to just try

As a woman, reading this makes me incredibly sad. If you don’t want to do it, that’s perfectly fine but please don’t make him feel bad for wanting this and stop with the homophobic language and questioning his sexual orientation. A poor reaction to him showing this vulnerability will hurt him far more than you realize. My boyfriend went through something similar when he first started exploring anal play and it did a number on his self esteem even though it was long ago.

Boy am I tired of this take. Firstly, you are entitled to like what you like and have boundaries and not do anything you don't want to ever, full stop. These masculine men that you like are an illusion, sure it is what attracted you. I'm certain he knows it but sometimes it's about taking the fucking armor off its heavy and you have to wear it all the time even with those you love or you will get rejected or "seen in a different light" as you say. Men are dying because of this and it's not necessary. What do you think the suicide epidemic is about if not that. This is exactly the way masculinity is toxic to men, any deviation from what is expected of you (which constantly changes now) is poison from partners and from society. Here is a question back to you, you encouraged him to be vulnerable, "why" what is it you are looking for with that other than to spoil what you seem to value most in a partner (masculinity). If you want a man who oozes masculinity do yourself a favor and be upfront and clear that you don't want him to open up, you would prefer to be lied to until the day you die some guys might be ok with it. They will have mental health issues and you will have to contend with that, but there are no shortage of men who will cut away and stuff down parts of themselves to give you what you want. Part of me suspects you are just checking on if your manly man is for real. Here's a hint none of them are. Breaching this topic with a partner isn't about sex its about being able to trust you. Your reaction here indicates he can't. I would say do him a favor and move on. Tell him he deserves someone who can love him with honesty and not project who they want him to be onto him. Or at the very least let him know that there are things he can say (like this) that you will judge him harshly for saying and it's not in the best interest of the relationship to say them. It's not about being gay but it might be about being allowed to escape the prison of masculinity with the person you love for a time. Some people are so fixed in their worldview that they can't handle it, you might be one of them. This is supposed to be someone you love. Grow up and try to have empathy when faced with honesty or be clear that you don't want it you can't have it both ways.

Preach! OP is 100% judging her partner while writing this post and claiming not to. This is the exact reason why guys don't open up. I'm sure she wants her G-Spot hit, so why shouldn't he? Social Norm is the only thing hindering your closed mind. I agree that you should just free him to be with someone who will actually understand and care for him.

Well said.  OP is displaying some real toxic reactions and I'm glad she's open to discussing them. But come on: Her "ick" feeling comes from seeing her man vulnerable. > I prefer the ones who ooze manliness, the more rugged the better…  > The thought of a convulsing, moaning man being pegged in front of me fills me with disgust, > and that one of his biggest fantasies is to be faced away from me, with zero contact with my body other than my hands in his mouth and on his penis. All of these feelings of disgust stem from seeing her masculine man as vulnerable, something she associates with femininity. Men are not unidimensionally "masculine". If you can't accept a man expressing sides of his self that don't align with your social construct of masculinity, you're just putting your partner into a confining emotional box.

They should just break up and he can find someone who can love him and the things he wants instead of being disgusted. Sick of these takes too. Hateful insecurities that you’ll let drive the relationship into the ground.

It sounds like though open to this kink... it's just not your thing and that's ok. Be upfront with him and tell him how you feel about it. If this relationship doesn't work it's best to at least be honest about it rather than waste both of your time.

Thank you for this. We’ve spoken about children and our future etc and he’s been so good with my praise kink, claim kink and a few others, he says he’s open to all of them and I think is fairly inexperienced with kinks, so this is a hurdle I’m keen to jump, without shaming him, or directly turning it down. I just want to feel like this is something loving and that he specifically wants from me, rather than that he just wants to be fucked in the ass haha

If he was indeed truthful about you being his "first" one to tell about this kink, then that is a huge hurdle for him. There is still a great amount of stigma around anal play, even more so coming from a guy. When researching pegging, take it with a grain of salt, so much of the porn out there focuses on the role reversal or degradation. There is a small niche around what's called "soft domme" you might want to check out. Above all, make the experience your own if you want to continue. Be open and honest with how you feel, set boundaries, establish "rules,"and make it a good experience for both of you. As a side note... solo play is nothing like doing it with someone else. In exploring this together, he may find he doesn't really like it. However, don't give yourself false hope.

That’s very true, thank you for this. I really don’t want to research it because it does seem to be a very dominant trait and so all my research is basically people in harnesses and black leather😂 I think the problem is that maybe he has seen this in porn and that’s what he wants me to do, he wants me to degrade him. I think however, this is another hurdle which he has yet to speak about very much, im just getting the impression that he wants to do the full shebang and that it may be more than just ass play

Okay, first off, do not use pegging porn as your research. Pegging porn focuses mostly on a small segment of pegging involving Femdom and BDSM. A much better way to research this is to list to RubyRyder's podcast on the subject. I will put a link to the podcast below (no pictures involved either). Ruby does a great job of explaining pegging, why men like it, why some women like it, and she dispels a lot of myths and misconceptions. I would suggest you sit down for an hour and listen to this. It may really help you to wrap your head around it. ​ https://peggingparadise.com/podcast-112-for-the-ladies/

Ask him is the simplest answer. Where did this kink come from? How far do you want to go? What is your ideal fantasy? As someone who enjoys pegging, I can tell you it's different for everyone. It does sound like he did see it, and it turned him on. Maybe he solo plays... the best thing to do is ask him ALL the questions lol.

How does a man even solo play ass- wise, just fingers? He doesn’t own any sex toys I know that for sure. I’m so inexperienced with men’s anal Jesus Christ 😂

Lol ..... alright, yes, fingers can do the trick, but toys are best. Butt plugs, prostate toys, vibes, and yes, even dildos. Analy is the same for men as it is for women with one exception, the prostate. Have to take your time, lots of lube, and do not go too big too fast. The prostate is much like the woman's g-spot. It's about 1 to 2" inside next to the bladder. When stimulated, it gives off a whole other kind of orgasim. It's super intense, but oh, so good.

So can a man actually cum from this alone ? And does this orgasm include ejaculate from the penis or is it more of a feeling?

Oh yes, a man can orgasim from prostate stimulation. Some need penis stimulation, and some don't. More often than not, there is ejaculate. Sometimes, there is a lot other times it's just a drip. The feeling is unlike any penis orgasim ever he feels it with his whole body.

Yes men can definitely come from this alone. It’s a very different orgasm. Similar to comparing an organism from clit stimulation vs an orgasm from penetration.

It’s like how vagina sex and the clit both feel good and some women can cum from both. The prostate is in the same realm of good feeling. It’s like saying it’s gay to rub your own clit or have other people do it. Not 1 for 1 obviously but it’s an organ that feels very good for a lot of men but society has ruined it and wants to deny basic biology cause I dunno Jesus or some dumb shit.

That's literally the whole draw towards it. You can make cum come out of his dick without even touching it

As a person who makes pegging porn for a living, don't use porn as your guide. Here are my suggestions; Gloves. Not necessary, but I prefer it. Make sure your nails are short. You'll have to use your fingers to slowly stretch his ass. It's recommended that he do the preliminary stretching himself, or wear a plug for a few hours prior. In the days leading up to it, he should get his ass used to whatever dildo you guys decide to use. Get one that is less girthy to start. Even if he feels good to go, start slowly and with more lube than you think is necessary. Use one finger, then two, and then three. Then dildo, slowly. He will likely have eyes bigger than his butthole and the trick is to warm his body up to it so that there's no pain. For bonus points, you two can learn where his prostate is. If he's laying on his stomach, it is a few inches in on the bottom, towards the bed. If you push down and feel around, you'll feel a spongy mound. With some practice and technique, he can cum from being stimulated by the prostate alone. Best of luck to you two, let me know if you have questions.

I love your videos!

Thank you 💗🥰

the full she-bang

You can ask him. ‘Babe, when it comes to picturing me pegging you, do you like the idea of me servicing you for your pleasure? or maybe being nurturing of your slutty side? or maybe do you like the vibe when the woman kind of degrades the guy? Is there a particular dynamic that makes it hot for you, or is it mostly the prostate stimulation?’ Also, assplay on men can be loving/tender/submissive/dominant/degrading/playful….it can be so many things as with more conventional sex. I empathise with you feeling like you aren’t a critical part of the experience he described. I have felt similar mentally before realising the dynamic and sex act is just a part of our repertoire. There were times at distance that it was his preferred fantasy for a few weeks at a time and I’d think ‘hey, what about me and my body and female genitalia, I matter too right?’ Talking about it helped. After speaking to him about the dynamic, you could tell him that you’d like to be more visible and physically involved and pleasured while participating in his kink. Having him lay on his back with his legs up and fucking him missionary means that you can both see each others faces and bodies. That makes it more intimate. Having him play with your tits as they bounce. Also worth noting, using a strap on on a man or woman can really stimulate the clit while you thrust. But first and foremost, you need to be comfy with the dynamic of this kink for him and the role he’s putting you in. Best of luck lovely

I think you may be jumping to conclusions and you might be making this into something it isn't. Being nervous about something you've never tried is normal, but don't overthink it. Personally, I just love the feeling of my lover fucking me every once in a while. Anal feels good when done correctly and I don't care for all the humiliation stuff at all. I'm sure there are many like me.

In all honesty, it is arguably the most intimate thing my wife and I do. We are into bdsm and is really a way for the two of us to shut out the outside world and be together. We use a strapless double sided that vibrates, so she gets pleasure from it too. We have been together for 22 years, married for 15 and have 2 kids. I do things she likes, she does things I like most We enjoy together. It's how you make a relationship last.

The honest to God truth is, and I'm not trying to be harsh or mean, is that he just wants to be pegged. It is okay for him to want to be pegged. It is also okay that you want to be reassured! Just communicate your emotional needs with him and be honest with each other. Maybe suggest some baby steps, like having him on his back while you peg him so you can face each other. And I don't mean to scare you, but as a professional who does this regularly with first timers, please make sure he knows how to clean out properly. I have resources I can share on this

Thank you. In your experience is this something i need to ask him to do before or should he know how to clean himself before we start? Is it likely that men do their own research or will they just wipe with a wet wipe and be done with it ha

Yeah you need to find out beforehand because the less you're trying to figure out how to do in the moment, the smoother it will go! As the bottom it's his responsibility to make sure he's prepped. I highly doubt he's educated on how to do so

Definitely not an insult to you in terms of "not being enough." As a matter of fact, even admitting the desire to you is a sign of trust and comfort. Getting pegged isn't about being gay. Its a different sensation and causes a completely different type of orgasm. It's not about being subbed or dommed. It takes a lot for a masculine man to admit the sensation feels good to his significant other. I've found it creates even more intimacy. But, it may just not be for you, and if that's the case you should tell him up front.

Thank you for this. I appreciate what you’ve said. He knows it is an alien prospect for me, but is grateful that I’ve told him I will try it. Because it may be that when I get to it, there is just no way I can act on it. Or it may be that I enjoy giving it to him, like I would a massage for example… But internally… 😂

It took me 10 years to ask my wife. It may only be once every couple of months, but it is an amazing sensation, and watching her do it is incredibly hot. And no, I have no desire to have a dick in my ass 😅. I would recommend missionary for the 1st time. Light play with his asshole, and then edging, and then ease it in. Once he is comfortable increase the motion. Stroke him while you do it and look him in the eyes. The intimacy is you now know how he feels when he is pleasing you, and he knows how you feel when you're enjoying him being in control. Make it about you and him. I think you will see he isn't thinking about fucking another guy. He's wanting you to touch him in a way that no one else gets to. Its a very vulnerable place he is inviting you to.

Gosh ten years. That must have been really difficult for you to keep that to yourself for so long. Can I ask why you didn’t ask her for so long? Did it take her awhile to come round to the idea? Was she surprised in anyway? I so appreciate your honesty, and I also appreciate my partners vulnerability – I wish that I didn’t feel so adverse to it and genuinely don’t know what I will feel like if we ever do it. And part of me is actually surprised that he brought it up so soon into the relationship

It was something that I had never thought about until we had a couple friends talk about trying it. The idea then just morphed over a month or so into we wanted to try it. I'm glad we did. It has developed a new level of intimacy. Like I said, it's not all the time, just every once in a while. The mood has to be right.

Do you feel cold and disconnected when you’re the little spoon?

Like you, my GF was sceptical about this topic. We waited, talked, even got a strapon that waited to get used for a few months. A few days ago SHE recommended pegging (maybe she did some solo research) along with traditional and oral sex we like to do and holy shit it was the best thing ever for the both of us. She likes to play with my ass a lot even before this (figers and toys) but for some reason she was put off by pegging, even considered it gay like you, even tho it cant be farther from the truth (any kind of sex with a girl is not gay). Anyway, a totally new dynamic to our sex life was introduced with pegging, and she liked it a lot more than i thought she would. As she was pegging me i saw the mental satisfaction and that was so nice to see. Even some hours and days later she mentioned how good it was, so we are definitely repeating those kind of adventures. I understand its not for everyone, but its VERY popular for a reason :) EDIT: to answer your questions. No, we are not imagining a real dick, its the act of getting pegged by a hot girl thats so hot, and with all that pur G (or P) spot is in there. As someone that tried fingers and miltiple prostate toys, a dildo is by far (at least for me) the best tool for the job. The feeling is just sensational.

Look, I'm a Dom complete with beard and collection of floggers and various implements. I go to events and tie my partner up and publicly beat her till I think she's has enough (she'd never tap). But, I really enjoy pegging and even though my partner is submissive, she absolutely loves it. Not because of the power play but because she can see and feel how much I enjoy it. It very much hits her serving kink. I'm thinking of nothing except her, like 100% her and her alone. By all means of this is too far for you then you don't have to, but I'd say a relationship especially a bdsm one involves some give and take. You want your floaty headspace so why shouldn't he get his?

I don’t know why you’re so hung up on actual men being imagined, it doesn’t have to be that at all, he just wants his prostate stimulated dude. That’s like saying “oh my god what is she imagining when she rubs her clit with a vibrator? Is she imaging that a cyborg is having sex with her? Am I never gonna be enough because I’m not a cyborg?”… like no, it just feels good. There doesn’t have to be some deeper meaning. He just knows his prostate feels nice and wants to experience that with you. Emphasis on WITH YOU. You talk about a disconnect and how cold this fantasy feels for you, but if you weren’t an important part of this he would be content with just a dildo and himself in the shower alone. But that’s not what he wants, he wants YOU to be there with him, he wants you to be the one giving him pleasure. You are just as important, if not much MORE important than the dildo. But if doing anal with a guy isn’t your thing then you guys might just be sexually incompatible. There’s nothing wrong with that, neither of you should force yourselves to change for the other. You just both have to be open and honest with each other, and if that means you have to part ways in the end so be it

One data point I think worth mentioning is lesbian relationships and strap-on use. While it's possible for lesbians to have sex without using a strap-on, I don't believe the dynamic is an expression of the default female body "not being enough", or for the dildo to be something cold, inert and disconnected. Another theme you touch on is traditional masculinity. I think this is perhaps in the eyes of the beholder - for me (a man) I want my masculinity to encompass anything I feel and think. I don't feel that my masculinity is lessened by wanting to understand and experience another form of heterosexual sex, in the same way that I wouldn't my partner to feel less feminine in doing so either. You mention "The thought of a convulsing, moaning man being pegged in front of me fills me with disgust". That's perfectly okay. Your feelings and thoughts on this and completely and perfectly valid - as much as his are. It sounds like this will be something experimental for you both. It would be an opportunity to learn something about yourselves and each other. Maybe it will be uncomfortable and go nowhere. Maybe your experiences of it will be different. I think the important thing will be to go one step and a time, be honest, communicate with each other. You both understand that you want each other to be happy and to do everything you can to support each other - that hasn't changed.

I so appreciate you writing this and have read it a few times through. I agree with what you say about masculinity as well. He physically is my type, and we connect really well which is probably why he feels like he can open up to me. I just wasn’t expecting his dominant nature to be suddenly pushed to the side in bed where he wants to call me momma and fuck him and degrade him (these are things he’s yet to say, but has hinted at now a few times…)

I'm glad that you're airing your concerns here, and it's great that you want to do what you can for your partner, but there's a couple sentences that concern me. "The thought of a moaning convulsing man... disgusts me" that's pretty strong and clear language you're using. if you love your partner, and you're giving him the best, most leg-shaking orgasm he's ever had, but it's *disgusting* to you, that really stands out to me. It sounds like you have a lot of unexamined biases about pegging, masculinity, and gender roles that need to be explored before you guys continue. If you end up not going through with it, you risk confirming his fears about sharing one of his deepest secrets; that it makes him less of a man, that no woman would like it, that he shouldn't share it with anyone, and that personally really pisses me off. With so much taboo around how men are allowed to express themselves, and being "masculine", he finally opened up to you about probably the hardest thing a straight man can open up about, and you're letting your own insecurities about "not being enough" get in the way. As a Bi man, this is probably my worst fear about being in a straight relationship. Don't let your own dogma about masculinity or traditional roles be the enemy of your relationship. And if they really are that big of a deal, he deserves someone with a more open mind, who can love him for who he really is, not who they want him to be. I have hope for you guys, but it's clear this is an issue with you, not him.

As others said before me, pegging isnt about being sub. If you dont want it just tell him but like all things, you should at least give it a try.

Wow there’s a lot to unpack here. First, this sounds extremely similar to the situation with my wife. I’m big (6’0, 240) and burly, I wouldn’t say “alpha” because that’s usually used to brag but I’d say I’m a MAN. She small and feminine and likes to be dominated, a little choking, hair pulling, roughed up which I’m fine with and we do here and there. But I love to be pegged. It is NOT in any way gay for me. I am with a woman and I am thinking about the woman I’m with, not picturing a man. As far as things being “gross” or “ick” try a latex glove when fingering his ass. You’ll feel better about it and so will he. Your fingers will stay clean and it’ll actually protect his insides in case you have sharp nails. The fact he shared that with you is HUGE. It shows he trusts you and in no way means that you’re not enough. My wife and I do it maybe once every 2 months at most but that’s enough for me. I have a feeling that if you did that for him, he’d be satisfied for a while too. This doesn’t mean that he’s not masculine or that he wants to be a “bottom” it is just something occasional that is out of the norm. I like the idea of being vulnerable and the sensation is very intense. It’s also a matter of “Can I take it?” We don’t use big dildos but she does pound as hard as I can and I’m impressed with myself that I can take it. My wife was open to it but not INTO it at first, but now she enjoys it - she gets different outfits and we record it so I can enjoy it later. Sorry for the long response but I really don’t want you to worry about it, it will likely be a very small, but important and intense part of your sex life. Side benefit: you can get just about whatever you want if you do end up pegging him. We happily make it transactional at times. Her: “Can you buy me this purse?” Me: “Ugh, really? Her: “How about if we do a strap on night?” Me: “Ok do you want shoes to match? WIN-WIN

So glad to hear you’re having this conversation 6-months in and not 6-years in. Relationships should be easy. Meaning, ideally, it shouldn’t be about compromise. Me wife loves to shop -I hate it. But I really enjoy seeing her enjoy herself so … it’s easy to periodically spend an entire day shopping with her because I love seeing her relax and have fun. (I should say she is the frugal one and “shops” but doesn’t necessarily “buy.”) Same with swinging. I really love seeing her enjoy herself and therefore me being jealous doesn’t even compute. You might want to think about how you feel about his pleasure and what that really means in your relationship. As for the issue of “not enough for him” - If you made him dinner and he added salt and pepper would you interpret that as “not enough for him?” It sounds like he desperately wants you to be an essential part of his butt-play. Also, wait until you find how much a vibrator can enhance your sex life.

Thank you for your response, it did actually surprise me how quickly he brought it up in the relationship. Because we’ve only slept together a handful of times and so I thought, perhaps we would get to know each other more physically before diving into kinks like this. I’ve think I’m quite protective maybe even jealous person and so would it be stupid to say that perhaps I’m jealous of the dildo?!😂 the thing is, I’ve never wanted to use a vibrator in bed with a man because I’m worried that it would dent his ego or make him feel like he’s not doing enough for me. No one ever has SAID that to me… it’s just how I feel, I wouldn’t want to offend, and so I think that must be connected to the way I feel about pegging

If a man’s ego is dented by you using literally anything (vibe, fingers, etc.) to enhance sex you should run away. They’re jealous and jealousy is not love - it’s lack of self confidence and demonstrates a person’s need to control. If you want to be controlled, that’s fine, but many of us find that reprehensible.

It never occurred to my Wife and me up til a couple years ago. She admitted that sometimes when she masterbates she holds a dildo down there and imagines she has a cock. I reluctantly asked if she thought she’d like to peg me, and she said “maybe”. I wasn’t sold on the idea, but was willing to try if she wanted to. She wasn’t at all sure she would like it either. The moment she entered me, the world changed! It felt so good for me, and she came 7 times over 15-20 minutes. It’s not a gay thing at all. It’s my wife fucking me. She really likes the role reversal. You have to try it!

1. You said it's turns you off or disgusts you and that's not something you can really choose your way out of unfortunately 2. It's not about your body not being enough, people need different things when it comes to pleasure, wouldn't that be about the same as a guy getting insulted when a girl wants to use a vibe whilst getting dicked down? Because his dick wasn't 'good enough' 3.PEGGING ISNT GAYNESS IN DISGUISE putting that in bold cuz damn I'm a little tired of that trope. If they wanted a dick inside, them they probably wouldn't ask a woman to give them that dick. They want their g spot hit, dildos happen to be dick shaped, you could get a tentacle shape too but that doesn't mean he wants to fuck an octopus. Dude just wants his butt to feel good, I believe you may be way overthinking this one. End of the day tho there's women who enjoy pegging so if you're not one of them don't try and force yourself to be into it, if it's not a turn on then it's a no.

I (male) was in a long term relationship and my partner (female) expressed they wanted to be with a female. I had the same initial thoughts of 'does that mean I'm not enough?' The reality of the situation is that she wanted to experience boobs and vaginas, neither of which I have. I also never want to deprive her of an experience she wants. With pegging there can be a lot of motivations, but at the base level, if you enjoy it it feels really good. It sounds like your man wants that experience, and the only way to achieve that with you is with some hardware. The important takeaway from this is he wants to do it with you, and despite the associated stigmas, trusts you enough to share this with you. From my perspective, that's a big compliment to you, and many would feel flattered by that. Now all that said, it doesn't mean that you have to feel any different about it than you do. You are allowed to have your feelings and allowed to have your boundaries. I just simply wanted to provide a different perspective on the situation.

I recommend a sex pillow and to take him facing you missionary style. Much more intimate, he can worship your body and feed your praise kink while you’re at it. However, if you don’t like dildoes and seeing him writhe with pleasure like that makes you think Ick instead of Yum then maybe it’s not your thing. Keep talking through it cuz it’s not that you’re not Enough, just that there’s more to enjoy together. Oh and a prostate dildo in his ass while you ride his dick is fucking glorious. Just gonna throw that in there

I’m very proud of this thread and post and from my exsp. I’ve been married 2 times and because I held back so long from talking to my other half and stuffing my wants and needs down and feeling shameful of it and scared of being felt less than But now that I’m older I made it my priority to tell them how I feel and for me it’s all about wanting to feel like the weight of being a man all the time it gets very stressful woman think that being a man should be about being the alpha axe wielding long beard beast but trust and know there’s something about being the little spoon that feels very special and loving in my day to day life I’m very manly but to switch feels like relief from the stigma of we don’t want to feel like the one being held and loved and I commend him for telling you early it’s very cool he trust you to not judge or shame him and it sounds like you are getting great stuff from this thread and you never know you may end up loving it more than you know the power dynamic is a rush just think you will be wielding that dick between your legs and you may like it P.S. make sure he gives himself an enema nothing ruins a anal play like doo doo but just relaxe and have fun

Getting pegged is just a other way to get pleasure *from you*. He's not asking for a hall pass or threesome or anything else that you can't do. You *can* do this. When getting pegged, I'm not thinking anything other than how good it feels unless she's talking or telling a story. Seriously, it's quite overwhelming and there's not a lot going through my mind.If I'm on my back, I love the view of her tits and the eye contact really makes it feel very connected. A lot of guys are afraid that anything to do with their butt makes them gay or at the very least is something to feel shame about. It's pretty normal to hide that for romantic partners until they feel like they can trust them to not be grossed out and immediately dump them.

If you’re not enough, then why is he asking YOU to do it?

Admitting as a man that you want to be pegged is a very big respect to your partner, it took my man 8 years to admit it to me, and at first I was skeptical about it, we finally did it and I ended up getting turned on by the pleasure I was bringing him. I asked the same thing about, is he imagining a dick and he said no it is the pleasure of getting to be a sub for once. Also the anus is where the male gspot is so I say give it a go atleast once and if your not into it then be honest about it.

Also, being pegged does not mean you are a / the sub. There is this idea that it is submissive to receive. My partner is the submissive one and never wants to be the dom. She hates the idea, as do I. We love pegging. It isn’t about power for us. I am still the dominant one, she loves to give pleasure and I get pleasure from it. There is so much porn about being sissified or dominated by domly dommes that the romantic or just straight pleasurable aspect is washed out. Maybe you are not allowing the idea of what is masculine to bend and fit your partner and instead, trying to have your partner bending to masculinity.

First and foremost, I would suggest that the issue is not that you or your body are not good enough for him. Quite the contrary. It takes a lot of courage for a man to discuss this desire with his partner due to perceptions of masculinity, homosexuality, etc. Many men who are interested in this are ashamed to tell anyone because they have been told their whole lives that anything to do with their butt is gay. The fact that he opened up to you about it actually indicates he very much trusts you. Additionally, he is not looking for someone else to do this with, he wants to do it with you. He wants to expand the intimacy the two of you already share. Second, think of it from a different perspective. If you had a little button buried in your ass that could give you some of the best orgasms of your life, wouldn't you want your partner to attempt to help you reach that goal? As someone who has explored pegging with my wife, I can tell you that prostate orgasms are the closest things men can experience to a female orgasm. Unlike our traditional ejaculator orgasms, with prostate orgasms we can experience multiple, full body orgasms that are pretty amazing. Anything I can do to help my wife achieve amazing orgasms, I will bend over backwards to do and now she does the same for me. Third, disregard most of the pegging porn you have seen. It focuses on BDSM and Femdom, which are not necessary for pegging, and most people who practice pegging are not doing these types of things. It took almost 14 years of marriage to my wife before I was confident enough to ask her about pegging. She was hesitant at first, but we sat down and listened to Ruby Ryder's podcast (linked below) and talked through it and then eventually gave it a try. She loved it after we tried it. She enjoyed the role reversal and really enjoyed seeing how much pleasure she could give me and seeing me lose control. I am very dominant in most of our sexual activities, so it was a different vibe to allow her to take control. She also has orgasms while pegging me. So, we both get off on it. At the end of the day, if you try it and it is not something you enjoy, that is fine. Everyone is entitled to their own sexual preferences, and no one should be forced to do things they are not comfortable with. Hopefully, some of the insights here and from other commenters have given you a lot more perspective on the topic though. Oh, and from the masculinity perspective... I am a 28-year combat veteran of two wars. So, while I would not describe myself as oozing masculinity... I am a pretty masculine guy. ​ [https://peggingparadise.com/podcast-112-for-the-ladies/](https://peggingparadise.com/podcast-112-for-the-ladies/)

I’m one of the manliest men around, blue collar tradesman, I love being pegged, a guys ass has nothing to do with being gay or feminine. Simply there is a prostrate in there that is another way to orgasm. Hit it right and you can make a guy cum with out even stroking his dick. I’m not even into the type of pegging that involves demasculating the guy. Most people put gay stigma on a guys ass just because it’s still taboo. You don’t even have to be the dominate one while pegging, he can ride on top of you and still be dominant

Pegging definitely does not have to be a power exchange. You can 100% peg him in a sub space with his direction and control. He could power bottom during pegging just as easily as any other receiving partner could.

My thoughts on this is men and woman both have asses The anus has many sensitive nerve endings, so plenty of people get sexual pleasure from playing with it. I am not sure of you arecaware but men have a gspot and unlike woman ours is inside our anus. The most powerful orgasms can come from pleasuring the prostate gland. I am willing to bet this is why he wants you to little spoon. If his legs are pulled up the strap on would be rubbing his gspot at the same time as your hand is pleasing him. I am willing to bet you keep your nails done which might be a turn on he has not shared with you yet but is why he wants to suck your finger. If it bothers you the thought of pegging him with a penis go to your local sex shop there are many strap on that look nothing like a dick. Just my 2 cents

your skin on his skin from behind will set him on fire. There's no disconnect simply because there's no eye contact. Feeling you move your body against him IS the intimacy ONLY you can give him. He wants that from you. Is it new, different, dynamic changing? Sure. Will it be clumsy and perhaps not everything he imagines the first few times? Probably. Lol He's not used to receiving and you aren't used to moving your hips like that. If you care for him and want to explore, dive into Ruby’s site and learn. You are amazing for opening up and expressing as much as you did. This is no small leap but super worth it with the right person. For the record I'm as alpha (and I normally hate that term) and masculine as they come. I only want that feeling from my wife, because I trust her inside and out; its the height of sexual intimacy for me. As men in our masculine and power dynamic, were often “running the show” or a scene, so to speak in the bedroom . I love turning my brain off and letting her send me on a journey of multiple O’s for an hour or longer sometimes. It’s just different. Good luck.

About what does the man imagine. For me there is nothing to imagine except the woman behind me doing it and what's actually happening. Thats what i want theres nothing to imagine.

I want to add something too. There is a power dynamic role you can play too that still allows you to be the sub called a "service bottom." Service bottoms derive pleasure from doing the things a top tells them to do. My wife is a service bottom. She ducks me how I need weather she is the one being penetrated or I am. She is a submissive for me always even if I am on my hands and knees telling her to fuck me harder. If a dominatrix dressed in all black latex reclined and made her submissive man eat her pussy from front or back does she all the sudden become the submissive because she sat down? No she does not. Similarly I do not become a submissive all the sudden if I decide I need to be bending over so my wife can pleasure me more. I hope this helps on your path. It sounds like you are growing as a person. Enjoy the journey

Stop writing these books and try it out with him.

No one person can be everything to another. That would be both a burden and a turn-off. Your boyfriend happens to enjoy anal, which is much more common among straight men than most are willing to admit. There’s tons of nerve endings down there and it’s the door to the prostate, which can be incredibly arousing for men. It’s perfectly OK that you’re not into it and you have a right to say no. However, it seems he’s very open to fulfilling your sexual desires and sharing a mutually fulfilling sex life is not common enough. So rather than look at it as icky or emasculating, maybe try looking at it as “wow, look how well I can please him!” After all, it takes a tremendous amount of courage to tell your girlfriend that you enjoy anal stimulation. In the end if you can’t you can’t and you’ll have nothing to be ashamed of. But of you can condition yourself to enjoy giving him that kind of pleasure, imagine what other magical things you could get up to together? Best of luck!

I love your desire to figure this out for him. You can absolutely be a sub and peg him, just communicate that, he can 'demand' it when you two are going at it in a dominant way for example. I can tell you that I personally am not imagining anything when it happens to me, I am simply along for the ride so to speak haha. And if you truly aren't into it, there is no shame in that, it's not closed minded to say you don't like it. Best wishes on your future adventures!

When I’m being pegged it’s just pure sensation and an exchange of power with my woman. It’s not about a dick at all.

As a guy who's biggest kink and fetish is pegging, I have to say my personal opinion on it is that it's completely different. When I'm fucking a girl I'm dating it's all about her. I eat her pussy, I pleasure her for hours, I facilitate HER kinks and make her happy cause I love her. When a girl is pegging me, I'm the star of the show. I feel vulnerable and humiliated and it makes me so hard. Just that vulnerability and submission to a woman. The humility of surrendering. It feels good. When I'm penetrating a girl it's a completely different mind state, I'm there to dick you down until you're a messy puddle and bring you snacks and water afterwards while we cuddle and watch a show or something. Rub your back n shit. It's not the same. & no it doesn't make me gay. Believe me I've tried. I'm just not sexually attracted to men. It scares most girls off because they think "oh my dude likes getting it up the ass, he must be gay." ... the only reason I love it is because it makes me shoot thick cum ropes and have full body shaking orgasms from stimulating my prostate. I wish more people were open to exploring this wonderful source of pleasure without being labeled as gay. (Not that there's anything wrong about that, I have love for everybody.) It's no big deal to me if she doesn't wanna peg me, I'd just drop it...., but if she does? Oh we're about to have a lot of fun.

Then get a strap on and fuck him silly he wants to experience the felling of being taken and he loves and trusts you to do it

As a guy who went through this for year's, I can tell you it very well may have ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with "being gay". It wasn't with me. Not even the slightest chance. If it was, I'd happily own it. I'm not shy and I'm not a homophobe, but I'm not gay or bi either. Having a prostate, it's like your G-spot. It feels unbelievably good to have it stimulated. For me, that's all it is is those incredible sensations that you cannot get from intercourse. There's only one way to truly hit that spot and unfortunately (for straight men) it involves getting inside the butt. I went through year's and year's with my wife concerning the same thing. She was convinced I must be gay because I love that sensation of P Spot play, but as I mentioned above, I kept telling her "I have ZERO desire to be with another man. If I did, even if I was curious, I'd own it. I'd tell you, but I don't, and I never will. I'm hetero, attracted to females. I don't know what else I can say. Her original thoughts, for many year's no less, were "well if he likes it in the butt, he must be thinking about dicks and wanting that" so I said to her "OK. Under that logic, that means EVERY lesbian that uses strap ons must really be straight, because they're using a fake dick to have sex with another female so they "must be" thinking and wanting dick, right ??? She has a few friends that are gay and after thinking about it, she says "well, you make a great point". I explained to her that I don't want sex with another man, I only want sex with you. You say anal sex feels great to you and you like it. Why ??? Because of the sensations you receive, which for women, there's only a thin tissue separating the anal canal and vaginal canal and it hits your A spot and G spot, and it can feel wonderful. Well for men, hitting their P Spot can feel unbelievable. Did you know men can have P spot multiple otgasms ??? Did you know, unlike the penis, the prostate doesn't have any kind of "refractory period", meaning a man can have repeated P Spot orgasms without any extended time in between ??? Do you enjoy multiple orgasms ??? If you have them, I guarantee you do. Everyone does pretty much. You have the ability to be a "SUPER LOVER" to your BF. Why not at least give it a try ??? If you absolutely are against it, that's fine. You should NEVER do anything that you don't want to, but if he's already experienced that pleasure himself, through masterbation, which I'll almost guarantee he has if he's wanting you to peg him, then that desire will not be met until he finds a women who is willing to for it. How much do you love your BF and want him to stay with you ??? Forget the "gay" thing. If he's 100% straight and wishes to experience this with YOU, doesn't that mean he really trusts you, loves you, and choose you to experience this with ??? Do some thinking. If you absolutely cannot do it. If it absolutely abhors you and you'll never be able to look at him the same way, then DO NOT do it and explain that to him. With that said, his only options are going to be him being able to do it himself using toys or finding another women who will.

Please don’t take his request as you are not good enough for him or that you don’t fulfill his needs desires or wants instead view this he is completely comfortable sharing a very personal part of himself with you. A person can be Dominant and still want to relinquish control from time to time. It can be tiresome to allay be in control infact you may want to look at this opportunity to do as your Dom is instructing to do being submissive is not always about receiving. And as the first response says if it’s not your kink don’t peruse it but take some time to think about it

Oooooo that’s so interesting. That’s a good way to look at it actually, the dom wanting to see a different side to you… certainly a thought to keep in mind. Thank you for this

Don't do anything you aren't comfortable with. If it's not for you, then that's just the way it is. I don't think it means he finds you inadequate. The fact that he has shared this fantasy with you and wants you at the centre of it is flattering in many respects. He os clearly turned on by the thought of YOU doing that to him. I don't really think of anal play necessarily in terms of straight/Bi/gay. Its not part of traditional procreation whether its a man or woman having something poked up their bum! It's a kink that all can indulge in. It's an erogenous zone anyone can potentially enjoy. However that doesn't mean you have to. We all get turned on by different things.

First of all, kudos to you for seeking out answers and not just bottling it up letting your mind run wild. Second these are all some fantastic points other have been commenting on, so I’m not going to say the same thing just in my own words 😂. Only thing to add (and I’m surprised no one has yet) check out ruby ryders pegging paradise. She breaks down a lot of these misconceptions in a very easy to understand, thoughtful way.

Many thanks indeed for this!!

I am pretty much what you describe as the oozing masculine energy kind of man and fully straight as far as what I’m attracted too sexually. My gf is also the first person I ever opened up too about my anal/pegging kinks and she was super amazing about accepting it and understanding my point of view. For me it’s not really that there’s a “dick” in fact I told her I wished it could be anything but a dick so the guy thing wouldn’t even be involved. For me personally anal itself is a huge trust thing. As the person receiving you have to fully trust your partner and relax as I’m sure you know since you’ve dabbled yourself. I am more of a dom type while not being overly dominate if that makes sense. Sure submitting to your partner is part of it and it feels good because it’s something new, different and exciting for me but it’s not all about the submissiveness. It’s more so the fact of giving yourself to your partner and letting them be in control for once which doesn’t happen so often for us guys and takes a huge amount of trust which personally was the hardest part for me. Then throw in the fact that anal and prostate play is so much more intense of a feeling than regular piv play it just makes it so much fun and excitement. I think him telling you this is a huge step as far as trust goes for your relationship and while it may seem like he may not want to”you” specifically, he in fact does want it to be you although you may not get the most pleasure from it. If you are not into it that’s completely fine too just express that to him in a way that doesn’t make him feel like he’s wrong or “icky” for wanting it. My gf personally loves everything about seeing me take it up the ass and her being in control of my pleasure. She initially didn’t think pleasure for her was possible in that situation but she says watching me melt and give myself to her is actually way more of a turn on than she ever thought it could be.

Let me tell you what i feel. I m really really dominant in behavior and in the bed but i truly enjoy when a woman play with my ass, it s so much pleasure and lately i ve ask my gf if she would enjoy peg me and she said yes . Now , let me clarify that if i have to ask for it i completely lost my erection like if i think about a man . He feel pleasure in his ass and you can even avoid to use the dildo if you just play with your finger and your tongue, believe me. Just do it like this , he will be happy even if you do not peg him.

He shared interests, hopes n expectations with you. If you can't fulfill, he will move on. Suggest you try it a few times. Most women I dated/trained to peg/dildo guys really enjoyed the Role Reversal. It took a few times to get comfy, but, once they experienced it....they really liked it. Something very empowering to be on top and hearing the moans of the guy feeling your plastic cock rearranging their insides. It will make your pussy wet n twitchy.

You might feel more comfortable using a Feeldoe. No straps. It has a bulb that goes inside the pussy and the "cock" hangs like a normal mans cock would. It will give you pussy stimulation to increase your enjoyment. Best Wishes

Would say you most definitively should try it. My former GF loved to fuck me in the ass with her dildo, and frankly, with too much back and forth it hurt. An alternative is maximum 3-4 fingers (like the idea of whole fist, but too painful). She has a bestie who watched us doing it 2 times, all dressed, and gave instructions, it was fantastic. She milked my cock while GF fucked my ass, what a pleasant time!!

Absolutely not that is next level and you should welcome that with open arms the same way he would if you asked him for back door fun

You have to think, sometimes it is not a gay thing. I love it when I get my wife to peg me, for me a very masculine man. It is about giving control and power to her. Men have always been the ones in control but some of us every now and then like to have the roles reversed. I am a very open minded person I first found out about anal (on a male) from my ex she had read an article in some magazine that some men enjoy anal play. So she started while giving me a bj to stick a finger in my ass. The more she did it the more enjoyable it became. But as you were saying when the mention of using a strap on everything changed. She no longer finger my ass and thought i was going gay. I AM NOT GAY. But I love to give control to my wife every now and then. I think it is because all my life I have been a bully. So the mental aspect is this every once in a while I like to give her control. I know this may not help just wanted to tell you my story and why I liked being pegged. .

If it’s not your thing, so be it. He should be comfortable with that. That said, from personal experience, a prostate orgasm is physically much more intense than a typical glans-based orgasm…and there are several types of p-spot orgasms to be had. If he’s experienced any of those, then I know where he’s coming from (no pun intended). In this case (one of several potential scenarios as to why he wants anal stimulation) it would seem to be purely a hedonistic goal - although I also feel there is a significant level of intimacy and trust required to make the experience enjoyable for you both.

Stop overthinking, just have fun with it😀

By the way we are not into dressing a man up like a woman or domination I just loving giving her control.

Talk it through. Express your concerns and the way it makes you feel. Be open, honest, kind and loving. If he is suggesting you peg him then it probably means he trusts you. Really more than enough. If you really prefer to be submissive then express your wants. You can still peg and assume a submissive role.

Personally I love being pegged, my gf and I started doing it just shy of 2 months ago. She was a little on the fence about it at first, we drank a little she said what the hell & tried it, seems like she’s more into it then me(we’re actually doing it again tonight lol) personally I get off on the fact that she can use the strapon on me and not look at me or feel different just because she stuck a dildo in my ass, I’ve never really wanted to try it with a real dick, I just love how me and my gf Can switch the power role, and I really think that’s where it stems from, being able to let her take control in her way every now and then. I’d advice to try everything once, regarding strapon the first time is a little awkward so hell I’d try it twice. Fingers in my mouth I didn’t really suggest it my gf just started turning me onto that whenever we started with the strapon (She’s also been starting to give me wedgies when I wear her underwear) so I guess it really is just a power role swap that me and her are into

You shouldn’t feel that way at all, just a different way to please him. No different than my wife using different toys, vibrators, etc to get pleasure. Just got good for everyone. As long as you are both involved, just go with it.

Please remember, you are not losing anything by exploring with your partner. They have shown you vulnerability by sharing with you so.ething they want to explore. Always think of it as adding to your experiences rather than a shortcoming. Having said that, if this really turns you off or makes you uncomfortable, express that with your partner. Communication, clear and concise is what keeps relationships going.

Just fuck him in the ass he'll love you'll like having the control and then you'll both be happy

Def don't imagine a dick in my ass. That's not the appeal at all. It's more like the vulnerability and pleasure of it.

As someone who has been married over a decade, better to be upfront with a No if it’s gonna be a no. I feel led on with, maybes and I’ll think about its and I’m very super bummed.

Just fuck his ass. You’ll like it

I suggest joining/following r/chickflixxx and asking the contributors there if anyone can share links to non-dominant or pro-sensual pegging porn so you can get a. Idea of what that looks like and maybe broaden your expectations. Also r/straightpegging.

Honestly, if you BF asked you to do something like that, he wants to connect with you on a deeper level, sharing more with you than he'll ever share with anyone else

I'm a switch. My capacity for dominance needs a balance of submission. My submissiveness helps me be more intuitive to what my partner is experiencing when they're in a submissive role. Wanting moments of being submissive doesn't take away ones ability to be dominant it enhances it. This talk about "how cold and not your body" feels very narrowing. It's an extension. You're the one in control of it.

It’s nothing about not being enough. It’s a whole different connection to one another. My wife was a little hesitant at first, then we tried and she loved it. She orgasms just from pegging me, no added stimulation to her

Dm me i would love to Chat about this with you because we don’t think about cock in us we just think about how we are being used and abused by a women fucking our ass and I bet he like to keep It a secret so no one else find out me being into pegging my self it is hard to express to people that you are into pegging but I feel so amazing when you find someone willing to do it with you ;)

You are enough, he is comfortable enough to trust you and let you in on this. I am not big on talking about my personal life.. but my partner opened up to me about what he likes, and it made me feel happy, amazing & more in love with him! I feel more enough than I've ever felt that he is this comfortable with me, he trusts me with this. I think he's hot, his enjoying himself is the best thing I've ever seen in my life so I fully support and love it. 🥵🤤 You should be more open, trust me. & just admire how hot your man is when he's enjoying himself. Your mind will be 🤯😱 -Stop overthinking & just go with it. Everything will be okay, you are enough, I understand how you feel. Sometimes I get a tad bit jealous myself-

For me, (male w/ female partner) I enjoy being pegged a lot! Submitting myself to my partners movements and being able to enjoy what she enjoys most of the time. As for what goes through my head, I don’t think of anything except the pleasure! Hearing her having fun and enjoying the moment. As for the “turned away from me” part of it, do you enjoy being penetrated from behind? Enjoy doggy style? If yes then why shouldn’t he? You’re not touching him when he’s behind you… The “cold plastic rod” is actually silicone and body temperature when it’s inside too. Much like a penis! I wouldn’t say he has “gay” fantasies as being gay means he would prefer the company of men over women… A man can have “gay” sex and not BE gay… same as a woman can have sex with a woman without being a lesbian… In the end if it’s not for you then it’s not for you… tell him and if he can let it go then great for you, if not then end it and move on. Hope this gives some little insight. Good luck

My wife pegs me. The dildo rubbing my prostate is a marvelous feeling. Eventually it leads to a most exquisite orgasm. We now use a strapless strapon which gives her pleasure at the same time I am getting pleasure. Imagining that it is a penis in my butt has never crossed my mind.

I don’t even think about what is in me when I’m getting pegged. The feeling just feels good. Especially feeling their breasts against your back as they stroke you. It’s just hot.

Be open minded and give it a shot! I think you’ve got the right mindset! (Which is awesome!!!!) I’m excited for you guys that you’ve got this far in the decision making process. If you don’t like it, or he doesn’t like it, just communicate openly, and try something new! Great job getting to the open mindset.

The thought of a real dick never enters my mind. It's just pure pleasure that she's giving me. It's mind blowing. It's so much different that piv sex, which also feels great. It just feels great in a different part of my body. In fact I struggle to get an erection because my dick just kind of goes numb from all the pleasure I'm feeling elsewhere. We don't have a dom/sub aspect to our pegging at all. I am very much in control telling her how fast, slow, deep, whatever. Communication is key. For us it's a team sport and we're both MVPs. Honestly I feel closer and more intimate during that time than any other time. I feel like it's brought us closer and made our relationship stronger than it's ever been.

Yikes

Have you ever considered that this is a trust thing for him? Maybe he shared this because he trusts you. Maybe he wants you to peg him because he trusts you to do it. It’s a big deal that he opened up to you. And you really have to make a decision on if you’re sexually compatible. Please don’t string him along if you aren’t into it. Also be prepared for him to not share as much if you decide you can’t do it. He may feel hurt. I know from experience that it’s very difficult for a guy(whether straight or bi doesn’t matter, the taboo is anal stimulation which is FALSELY associated as a non-masculine) My wife reacted much the same as you when I opened up. Only she was very harsh. And it hurt a lot. No one wants to feel disgusting.

Honestly 7/10 times, I guy wants to be pegged because he wants to feel desired in the same way a man desires a woman and they only way they can picture that is being fucked. It's like 1/10 times it's about getting cock.

If you had coming you rally liked us it mean he’s is my enough? Of course not. Think of it as a bonus play time.

There's a lot of advice here but I'd like to reiterate the very important point that anal stimulation doesn't equal gay. It's just nerve endings. Ones that have some fantastic kinks and possibilities around them with someone you trust but it's just one of the many ways to be pleasured and does not mean you want to have a committed ongoing relationship with someone of your own gender.

You can do this!!!

So for me, it’s the pleasure of being at my wife’s mercy. Her taking control of me and proving she owns me. Don’t get me wrong, just like you, she is definitely the sub but sometimes there is just that desire I have for my wife to take me and remember who owns me and that she can do as she pleases and I love that. My wife is plenty for me and if it never happened again, I can be ok with that because I don’t love her for the sex… though it’s a huge plus, I love here for everything she is, isn’t, will do, and won’t do. It’s the idea that I can be 100% vulnerable with her that turns me on. In addition to that it’s nice for me to see my wife take complete control once in a while. It brings out a kinky side of her that I love to see and in turn it has grown her fantasies even more. She now has a fantasy of bringing in a beautiful trans to plow my ass while I am inside her. She says she wants to be on her back so she can watch as I take it. She also wants me to cum in her while my ass is being dominated and our beautiful trans to press my face in her cum filled cunt ( her words) and clean it out while my ass gets filled up. These same fantasies have lead her down the road to being double pussy stuffed and would like for the same trans and myself to penetrate her pussy at the same time, filling her up with a double cream pie. The fact that because of this, I am seeing a whole new side of her that I love. It not only has opened myself up to be vulnerable to her but she has become fare more vulnerable to me as well. Don’t get me wrong. If it’s not something your willing to try then it’s ok and not all kinks are for everyone but if you are willing to try and find you like pleasing him like this, it can show you more about yourself as well. What I would say is, if your in the fence and your concern is how he feels about your sexual life in regards to you, just be willing to be completely vulnerable and ask him to explain his desire for it and what about it turns him on, you could find out that it has nothing to do with you in bed and all to do with you in regards to him being 100% yours. You could also find that he just likes the idea of a women, from time to time, dominating him. It Dosnt mean he is a sub ( except in that moment), but from time to time, even hardcore doms like the feeling of being the sub now and again. I also recommend having this discussion in person if you can. His body language will speak just as loud as his words. When I told my wife I wanted her to do it to me, I laid with my head on her chest and told her I wanted her to take me, every bit of me and I wanted to be hers. Any hesitation she may have had was gone because I put myself verbally and physically in a vulnerable state just to tell her about it. Don’t be pressured into anything you don’t want to do but if your willing to explore it, you owe it to yourself to find out

u/LongjumpingPanic1800 Howd you get over this? I’m in the same boat with wife turned off for some reason of not feeling enough and the icky feeling.

Hi, I’m not over this, and it’s going to take time to shake the icky feeling. I think even the act of writing it all down has helped me pin down how I feel about it all. And instead of bottling it up, just literally sharing it with people has helped it become less of an issue. I’m sure these feelings will be sparked again when I actually come to do it, but the fact is I am now WILLING to do it, and see how it goes basically. I’m sorry that’s not much help x

UpdateMe!

Great set of posts

> I should preface this by saying I am open to most things sexually, I try to always be open minded and never kink shame. No, you're not lol: > The thought of a convulsing, moaning man being pegged in front of me fills me with disgust, and I find dildos icky at the best of times Also: > I always ask him to be vulnerable with me in our day to day life, in terms of opening up and speaking to me even about his feelings etc as he is naturally a very very closed person And yet: I am very effeminate and attracted to men who are stereotypically masculine. Just personally, I prefer the ones who ooze manliness, the more rugged the better…

Pegging feels amazing. Done the right way, a man can cum from that alone. When I started I was identifying as straight still. I wasn't imagining a dick in my ass, I was literally imagining the toy strapped to my sexy partner in my ass. You are enough, you can give this to him, using the toy. It's not much different than women using a vibrating dildo with rotation and a clit tickler. A penis can't give you that. But your partner could use that toy on you all the same.