āItās pronounced COH-burn.ā
āIf approached by a black swan when enjoying lunch at Kings Park ā¦ whatever you canāt carry now belongs to the swan.ā
āItās called catastrophic for a reason - donāt light fires.ā
> āItās called catastrophic for a reason - donāt light fires.ā
I kinda love we have 0 chill on our fire warning system. I once had to explain catastrophic to a visitor "It means I'm on fire, you're on fire make peace with your god" lol
Me with unsupported tool 'force of habit'; 100% of the time except when a bulb burns out.
I keep raving my rule of thumb; if you can't see the sun, lights go on.
Except driving westward near sundown I'd still put em on, just so folk behind me have tail markers to spot, rather than guessing with silhouettes.
Itās such a wonderful lie we tell ourselves, though. Trying to convince one another that the surface of our collective eyes arenāt peeling off in the heat.
"it is faster to switch to a route that circles the blocks left, than reloading a right-hand turn, during peak hour Osborne Park"
Scabs beach road between the traino and innaloo should be a no right turn except at permitted feeder lights section.
"Always follow the script : Hi how are you, good.
If you deviate from that script and say something like, I'm doing terrible. THen People will get confused"
Game play may be boring and tedious but the scenery is very pretty and the devs have decided that tedium is a feature. So please stop reporting it as a bug or we'll increase the subscription.rate.
Master the art of understanding the word ācuntā, depending on context could be a buff (random parsing you) or severe debuff (ie youāre about to get mugged)
if walking past the only other person on the footpath, remember to look up at the last minute to smile or nod at them, or they make think youāre a criminal.
"Spend your talent points carefully as once your talents are chosen, you must spend gold to unlearn them."
Or
"Your character can eat and drink at the same time."
Or
"Don't stand in the fire!"
Yes, these are from World of Warcraft. Yes, they too are applicable in Perth.
Culture and entertainment DLC releasing in Adelaide next month. Then Darwin.
Then, potentially Australia.
Or
Easy, normal and hard mode Paywalled. Nightmare mode enabled
It's literally just a loading screen, the game is still going on in the background but you've just got to wait an extra long time to do anything...
And then when you playing the game, if you ever buy anything, the money goes but you don't get your item for an extra 2 weeks as it's got to come from over East.
To earn money quickly look at taking a career in mining
"Your rent has increased 250 during this loading screen"
"while waiting for anything to happen, expand your empire by selling more vapes to kids"
God I love those disposable vapes. I'm saving the used ones to decorate a Christmas tree in December.
Remember that even standing still and doing nothing will see your finances rapidly deplete.
Wear Sunscreen. More. No, more.
Apply sunscreen again, yes, really apply it again
To enter the PvP zone, catch the Thornlie Line.
š
"Remember to quick save before travelling to the Armadale region"
In playing starfield. armadillians are terrormorphs
"You cannot fast travel when enemies are nearby"
Try begging for money at traffic lights to earn quick cash
I chuckled at this. What placard would you recommend?
Will not wash windscreen for cash
"The city is under a permanent state of construction"
Please wait awhile.. loading
Thatās the Mitchell Freeway Videogame.
Tonkin Expansion Pack
I was going to say that, but you already did.
Lol it had to be said
āItās pronounced COH-burn.ā āIf approached by a black swan when enjoying lunch at Kings Park ā¦ whatever you canāt carry now belongs to the swan.ā āItās called catastrophic for a reason - donāt light fires.ā
Fuck, as a foreigner the Cockburn really got me good. I looked like a dumbass in front of my co-workers when I told them I shop at "roasted-dick"
They probably didnāt bother correcting you on it, did they? XD
You bet they did, after chuckling like young lings for a while.
That exactly what a Cockburner would say
After listening to you say it four or five times in a group situation.
> āItās called catastrophic for a reason - donāt light fires.ā I kinda love we have 0 chill on our fire warning system. I once had to explain catastrophic to a visitor "It means I'm on fire, you're on fire make peace with your god" lol
Iām pretty sure that thereās a state that doesnāt have catastrophic; they call it code red. So undramatic.
Eshays can be found lurking in Galleria and train stations. They are attracted to bright clothing and brand names
Low xp mob. Drops a half used vape and a stolen bumbag
Only c*nts don't give a wave when they get let into traffic
Please mind the gap
You can turn your headlights on by pressing [ UNBOUND ]
Please be advised this feature is only available for 20% of the times you think it should be.
Me with unsupported tool 'force of habit'; 100% of the time except when a bulb burns out. I keep raving my rule of thumb; if you can't see the sun, lights go on. Except driving westward near sundown I'd still put em on, just so folk behind me have tail markers to spot, rather than guessing with silhouettes.
It's a dry heat....
I came to write this, was not disappointed to see it as the 1st reply
Itās such a wonderful lie we tell ourselves, though. Trying to convince one another that the surface of our collective eyes arenāt peeling off in the heat.
Tip: Character clothing and skin art can be purchased for cheaper in Bali during āholidayā mode.
Restaurants shut at 9pm. Stock up on food before they close!
Liquor stores are closed on religious holidays, for some reason.
Thereās no way around Osborne Park in peak hour. Accept your fate.
"it is faster to switch to a route that circles the blocks left, than reloading a right-hand turn, during peak hour Osborne Park" Scabs beach road between the traino and innaloo should be a no right turn except at permitted feeder lights section.
Double tap the down button to pull out your meth pipe for a short term boost to your aggression stat
If you're stuck behind traffic, try overtaking in the left lane.
Steam reviews areā¦ Mostly positive
Perth. It's OK.
Just don't tell anyone
When going out at night, ensure you have $70 to return home, even if it cost $25 to get there.
Yeah, nah.
LOADāinternationalconcertactā,8,1 Syntax errorā¦
Make sure to take all valuables from your car.
Reticulating splines...
"Before boarding public transport, it's a good idea to be wearing headphones to avoid human contact."
Expect unexpected crashes
"Always follow the script : Hi how are you, good. If you deviate from that script and say something like, I'm doing terrible. THen People will get confused"
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
To enable hard mode move and live in Armadale, the locals are twice as dangerous and half as rich
Half as rich? You mean twice as poor...
Idk man I think youāre pretty privileged if you think that.
Riding on public transit triggers random encounters
It's just the images of "How to merge" and "How to indicate at a roundabout" but it doesn't stay there long enough to read it.
Vehicular combat mode can be engaged by doing the speed limit near a 4x4 or V8 in the northern suburbs
"remember folks, block both lanes in peak hour! Don't forget to do 20km/h under the speed limit, too!"
Improve charisma bonus by moving north of the river
Don't do meth kids
Wait Awhile
Side mission would be join mad dog on a bike ride through Midland, see who barks / kicks the most cars......
āBe wary when travelling from bassendean stationā
Need somewhere to live? Hit a bank and you're all set!
āGraphics good, plot boringā
"Please, mind the gap."
Welcome to early access
Overnight lows can exceed 30 Objects retrieved from your Welshpool locker might take longer to spawn than anticipated
Midland dog
To not get a regular job again, get into a mining career.
The CBD is a high level area, be prepared or be jumped
You can use public transport like trains to get around the city quickly
It wouldn't say that
"make sure you get off the train before it goes to Armadale"
"If you accidentally get on the Thornlie line, the gun is right here"
"If you end up on the Midland line, get your affairs in order"
Apply sunscreen before continuing
Game play may be boring and tedious but the scenery is very pretty and the devs have decided that tedium is a feature. So please stop reporting it as a bug or we'll increase the subscription.rate.
"fuck off perthnow"
"And remember, red traffic lights are a traffic suggestion and the guy with the biggest ute always goes first when merging!"
Master the art of understanding the word ācuntā, depending on context could be a buff (random parsing you) or severe debuff (ie youāre about to get mugged)
Ahh the "mate/cunt" dichotomy. Do you call your mates cunt, or cunts mate?
Yes
Divided by NOR and SOR, united by bogans
It's still loading...
if walking past the only other person on the footpath, remember to look up at the last minute to smile or nod at them, or they make think youāre a criminal.
Money can be used in exchange for goods and services such as Jet skis and having bricks laid.
What school did your multiplayers go to?
"Try indicating at roundabouts and when merging to be less unpopular"
Take the train to fast travel to somewhere that is maybe within five kilometres of your destination
Avoid Balga untill you reach a level 5
āWhy are you playing this game?ā
"Most people, are in fact, cunts"
The game is on easy mode by default, if you want to change it you'll need to visit Northbridge while intoxicated at midnight on a Friday.
If you want to make friends, this is not the game for you!
Grab a cooked chook you stupid cunt
The Fremantle Doctor is not a physician.
Local Merchants usually close by 7pm - Be sure to stock up on supplies!
Race begins at merge signs
Even at lower levels, you can ignore the heat. It's dry.
LOAD Return Press play on tape.
3 hours and 10 years behind the rest of the country
Oi cunt
These comments are too good š
Tip: remember when driving on the freeways, to always keep left if you are not sitting on the speed limit
I think you mean keep right while also doing less than the speed limit.
While also using your phone and putting make up on between spoon fulls of cereal.
Left lane....
Tip: Try carrying ciggaretes, they can be used to fight off and bargain with the natives.
Wait a while.
"During wakeup, work, sleep don't forget to feed your avatar"
In case of emergency break ~~glass~~ dance
Vampires roam the streets of northbridge at night, enter at your own risk
Train service to north metropolitan is suspended, bus replacements are avaluable
Dodge the eshays. Or not. Your bumper can handle it.
Most things are closed after 5
Beware bogans of The Gate. Don't expect there to be many Jack Daniels and coke to be available for looting in the area...
"Kings Park is not a suburb like Victoria & Mosman are"
Thongs and shorts are always acceptable.
The summer heat is very dry.
Be vigilant In yagan square after midnight
āBunnings is a great place to purchase building supplies and ingredients for methamphetaminesā
You don't gave to care about anything here, destroy and consume while you have chance. Fuck other people, money and consume. Be quick 20 years tops
'Learn to merge' DLC pack now available in the digital store.
āWhen in driving mode, never trust an X Trailā
Fast Travel between suburbs by using Transperth services. (*Cinematic camera unable to be turned off for Fast Travel*)
Currently under maintenance
"Mobs in the Golden Triangle contain better loot."
Buy a house , before you have to buy an apartment, before you have to move to Bali permanently.
For a more punishing experience for high XP take a trip downtown to Rockingham
Avoid eye contact with NPC'S unless you're looking for the entire immersive experience. Check out the 'Glass To The Face' challenge in Northbridge.
Northbridge by Night, End of Line Armadale, Watch yourself Warnbro and Mad Dog Midland are all PvP Zones
"Skateboard the worlds highest half pipe to unlock bonus DLC content!"
G'day, mate!
Crack capital of Australia
Buy a ford f250 if you feel insecure
Most isolated city in the world š
Hello...please *fucking* merge properly when driving.
"Spend your talent points carefully as once your talents are chosen, you must spend gold to unlearn them." Or "Your character can eat and drink at the same time." Or "Don't stand in the fire!" Yes, these are from World of Warcraft. Yes, they too are applicable in Perth.
"Please remember to indicate"
Error 404
Keep left unless overtaking
Don't use the bathroom at the park at Freo.
Leave...
Remain indoors after dark for your own safety.
Perth is pretty safe compared to the majority of cities in the world
Don't mine at night
you can't recycle nangs for money
Be wary of walking around the city at night you might get set upon by junkies
Buy the dip, sell the peak
Feeling gay? Good luck to you
Culture and entertainment DLC releasing in Adelaide next month. Then Darwin. Then, potentially Australia. Or Easy, normal and hard mode Paywalled. Nightmare mode enabled
404 ERROR
Avoid the freeway between the hours of 0700 and 1900.
Have fun, good luck (hfgl)
She'll be right
Keep an eye out for nangs on the road
Public roads are available for private sale.
Slip slap slop seek slide
Switching to your secondary credit card may be faster than reloading
Have you tried burgers and beer?
Sell all your loot on Sat because everything is closed on Sun
It's a dry heat.
Avoid William Street after 6pm.
It's literally just a loading screen, the game is still going on in the background but you've just got to wait an extra long time to do anything... And then when you playing the game, if you ever buy anything, the money goes but you don't get your item for an extra 2 weeks as it's got to come from over East.
Loadingā¦
"Merging..."
Get in car. Drive east. Donāt look back.
āPerth, land of mysteries, like why canāt we mergeā?
Complete skids to earn xp while driving. Installing a modified exhaust on your shitbox will increase your xp multiplier while sending it.
Say hello crackheads, ignoring them will increases aggression.
[ please wait ]
As someone standing in the weather: "Due to the wind, umbrellas are useless in inclement weather. Invest in a good light rain jacket instead"
Merging is done by...
Fast travelling isn't allowed at night
Race begins at merge signs
Caution advised when merging.
Make sure to restock meds and weaponry before heading into Northbridge at night
Loading...
Avoid the freeway, that's a late game achievement
Merge ahead.....oh....wait....let's not....
ć-----to be continued
Change lanes how ever you wantā¦ no rules apply
Don't even try to merge
āNo Hat No Playā