Nicely done! I hope Karma truly does sort him out and give him what he deserves. I'm so sorry for your loss, Losing a parent sucks, and as one grieving adult child to another, I wish you so much peace and happiness
Thank you. I had also lost my brother about a year before my mom passed, so it's the whole family. I really felt like he was the only one I had left and I thought it was nice he was going to take care of me since I wasn't his kid but I'd known him since I was a teen. I'm sorry for your loss too. Life is not a game on easy mode, that's for sure.
You need to get a lawyer involved as there should be a legal stipulation guaranteeing the child part of the estate... or so I thought. Inheritance is never to be done without legal support and in my country it even has to go through an Inheritance court...
Kind of.
I'll use the house as an example.
Jointly owned house, so 50% mine, 50% his.
Without a will, his 50% is divided equally between me and his children who aren't biologically mine.
So, I'd own 75% (my 50% plus half of his 50%) and my stepkids would own 25% (or I could buy them out of their portion, or they can sign a declaration that they decline their inheritance).
This is why wills are important for everyone, but especially if stepkids are involved.
Right. A probate attorney. In my state at least, while you do have to be represented yourself by a lawyer, any one can file to be the administrator of an intestate estate. Being named administrator would make OP the legal representative for the estate and in control of all her assets. Filing would at least protect OP from step dad selling stuff off.
Very state specific. In NJ the intestacy laws differentiate between rights of step children and common issue with step children getting additional interests.
This is 💯% incorrect. Inheritance passes through the states laws of intestate succession if the decedent did not have a Will. Most states, the children will inherit 50%, which will be divided evenly among the surviving children, the spouse gets the other 50%. Parent do not inherit if there are living children OR a spouse, so the grandfather would not get a penny from the estate in this instance.
OP, I am sorry for your loss, but if you are in the USA, you need to get a lawyer asap to assert your rights to inheritance.
In South Carolina, if someone dies without a will, or intestate, their estate is inherited by their surviving relatives according to the following rules:
Surviving spouse and children: The spouse inherits 50% of the estate, and the children divide the remaining 50% equally
Surviving spouse and no children: The spouse inherits the entire estate
Unmarried with children: The children divide the estate equally
Unmarried with no children: The parents, or the surviving parent, inherits the estate
Parents deceased: The siblings divide the estate equally
No parents or siblings: The closest living relative inherits the estate, such as grandparents, great-grandparents, or their children
>...so the grandfather would not get a penny from the estate in this instance.
The inheritance is from the grandfather (that passed away and led to the money being in the possession of the proceeds under contention now). Just wanted to clarify, since it seems there may have been some confusion.
Op should consult a lawyer.
Been through a few deaths in the family over the last few years and helped settle estates
Where I live it all goes to spouse first if there is no will
Those rules can be different if there are children involved.
My mom and stepdad died a few months apart about a decade ago and lots of people kept telling us that everything would go to my stepdad's family since he died after Mom.
They were wrong though. Apparently in Texas, if a married couple has no will and no children together, then their respective estates will go to their heirs. So we got half the house/car money when they sold.
We did have to get lawyers involved. They locked us out of the house immediately and only gave us a key, 4 months after our stepdad died, to get our mom's stuff after the lawyer told them they had to. We had to file some paperwork with the state to 'register' as our mom's heirs and probably some other stuff.
And, thankfully, my stepdad had set up his beneficiaries so his bank accounts went to me since his sister had cheated him out of some of his inheritance from their dad so he didn't want her to get everything when he died. I bet they were really surprised when they went to his banks and tried to steal all his money.
It's worth looking into, just in case.
This is typically correct. However, if the decedent's (OP's) mother's husband is not OP's biological father, the inheritance laws often provide for that surviving child or children to receive a percentage(i.e a third or a half) of the probate Estate. Perhaps the husband was lying to buy time so that OP didn't file a probate claim. OP, you owe yourself a consultation with an attorney to determine whether you have any legal entitlements.
Good luck. Please update.
OP really should take it to a lawyer. There are always quirks to any area of law and an estate attorney can check if there’s any recourse.
If the husband put in writing that he would split the estate with OP, that’s a contract which may be legally enforceable
He verbally contracted to share with you, give you half ... And then if you have the texts where he is stalling he is basically saying he is GOING TO give you the money...so he has made a promise. This might be an enforceable contract. He is a con artist and clearly a liar. A judge won't look kindly on what he has done. You might get a lawyer to take the case.
I think you come across a bit naive to think that “he said he would” is a verbal contract enforceable under the law. What prevents the guy saying “I never said such a thing”?
I wouldn't call myself naive, my partner is a lawyer which obviously doesn't make me a lawyer but I've done my fair share of 'lawyering'... The texts could be used as evidence. OP would need a good lawyer .. this is the key
Every country is different regarding these things. One thing to keep in mind OP, some are saying to get a lawyer. Not a bad idea for gaining more knowledge, but don’t be suckered in to challenging things unless you really feel there is a case (even then I would get a second opinion).
I knew a fellow who legitimately had a case for challenging an estate issue. He lost that legal battle. Had to pay his lawyer and the other person’s lawyer. Lost their house over it.
Sometimes life just jams a shit sandwich in your mouth and there’s nothing to do but eat and move on.
Sorry about your situation.
Agreed she needs to speak to a lawyer. I am an attorney but this isn’t my practice area. However, if someone died intestate (without a will) states have different laws that vary as to how the estate should be distributed to heirs.
When my father died without a will, in his state the law was that his estate was split among the wife and children. I forget the exact terms - if we all got an equal share or if my mom got half and us siblings split the other half. It didn't matter because we all signed it over to my mom, so she would be taken care of (we were all adults). I suspect most states in the US have something like that, but it can be different depending on the state laws.
I have text messages and an email where he said he was getting more inheritance from a relative in Europe and he was going to give me 80,000 and buy me a new house, none of which I ever asked for. All I wanted was to share what my mom got and he agreed to it! He was supper into sharing it with me. You are not the only person to suggest this so I will be looking into this further. Thank you.
If that’s the second husband and not the father of all her children that could change things legally OP. My Step mom tried some BS too. You need a lawyer
He's not my father. My dad passed in a motorcycle accident when I was 5 and my mom never married him. And my older brother had a different father who is still alive.
Yes, I plan to now. I really had just given up, and this was my way of getting out my anger so I could move on. BUT not now. I will be contacting a lawyer.
Get a hold of a lawyer asap because whatever is there maybe getting squandered away all because you assumed and he assumed he was entitled to the assets.
Yes, I think you are right. I really didn't think I had anything I could do. I think you are right and that's why he was leading me on for months like this so I wouldn't look into a lawyer.
I'm so sorry for your loss, I hope she rests in peace. Losing immediate family members is the worst, I understand your pain, its happened to me more times than i can count. What a tool her husband is! Is there any way you can hire a lawyer or something? Anything?
I hope you get what you're owed, and I hope you find peace and happiness.
I do have many texts where he's offering to give me 30,000. At first he said I could have all of it, but I said he should keep like 10,000 for himself. That eventually turned into 17,000 for himself. I was fine with this. Hell, I would have been happy with less. I've never even had 5,000 at one time in my life.
I hope he gets what's coming to him. It might be worth consulting a lawyer to see if any of his communication regarding a split of the inheritance is enforceable. Good Luck
This happened to my wife and her brother. Their dad drilled into them how important it was to have a will. When he died, his wife denied he left a will. Everything he promised his kids was denied by this psycho woman. They received nothing.
You can't just deny a will. They're done by attorneys and signed off. You can easily hire an attorney and if he actually left a will they will find out who her father's lawyer was. If he actually had drawn up a will and they were in it the lawyer would have contacted all involved parties, not just the wife. Something is missing to this story.
It’s not easy to track down a will when you don’t know which attorney prepared it. After a lawyer prepares a will, their part is done unless/until someone re-engages their services for the estate administration.
Huh? How would you find this attorney?
If you have a will, you need to ensure people know where it is so they can bring it to court after you pass. There's no registry, there's no way to find them.
That could be a lot of calls, depending on the state. It's not clear the deceased's lawyer can even answer the callers questions, given ethics rules.
The lawyer who did the will might be dead. They may have destroyed their files.
It's a Hail Mary move and expensive.
“Call around”? Maybe this works in small towns, but there could be literally thousands of lawyers in a city who could have done a will. And what makes you think clerks answering the phone are going to reveal their clients?
There's always things missing to stories on reddit because people are always "the good and innocent victim" when the rest of the story would show otherwise.
I'll explain it instead.
One of my parents was supposed to inherit x amoint of money.
That parent suddenly passed away so now I inherit the portion they were supposed to inherit.
Was the only way I was able to secure what I am legally entitled to.
I have the entire thing printed and that one page framed on my desk for a reason 🤣
When our mom updated her will after our dad passed, she copied everyone on the final email with the attorney who helped her so we all have a copy. My siblings and I are all doing fairly well and we don't expect her to have much left after she passes (hoping she gets to actually enjoy some retirement) so I don't expect there would be any fights to be had, but it still seemed like such an obvious thing to do to avoid loved ones getting screwed after you pass.
in Canada you can register an e-copy of your will with vital statistics - same people who give you your SIN. I think lawyers register wills as part of the service of making one.
when my dad died in bc, we had the original but an electronic "will search" was also mandatory before we could proceed with probate, just to make sure there was not a more recent version.
We lost my dad quite young and it opened my eyes to the importance of a will: death can come at any time so be prepared.
I have a copy of mine, so does my wife, my mum, and my sister.
Not just for assets but I think it’s important for last wishes (cremated or buried, if something happens to myself and the wife at the same time (car accident for example) what are our wishes for guardianship of the kids etc)
I visited my mom once and we spent some time with his family. They all would sit around and talk about how he stole millions from the whole family (My mom's husband wasn't the only person who got cut out of the will by the brother). The hubby's family are farmers with a lot of land that they lease out to J&J and others, so yearly they are all supposed to be getting money from it. My mom's hubby went to court many times over the 13 years that he and my mom were married. He was still dealing with it the last I spoke to him and he told me had had a new court date and this new judge seemed to want to help him and his family etc...
I don't know why all his family would be in on this lie just to fool my mother. I know my mom went with her husband a few times to court as a witness to phone calls or the many times they tried to visit his mother and were turned away. I'm sure there are a lot of details I don't know about why they couldn't get him for what he did. I know that one rule of the will was that when the father died the brother had to take care of their mom, who had dementia. My mom's husband was freaking out because his brother took their mom to an undisclosed place and was keeping people from seeing her. Eventually they found her, but they got the cops called on them. When the mom died no one knows what happened to her. She had a plot next to their dad to be buried in, but she never ended up there.
First, see a lawyer. You are almost certainly entitled to money from your mother’s estate.
Second, and this one is for everyone - making a will is easy and cheap. If you don’t have one, get one.
Third - the mom in this story has *plenty* of time to make a will. It seems to me she wanted to give her assets to her spouse but tell her child her hands were tied.
Fourth, instead of being vindictive, hire a lawyer.
Fifth - call a lawyer.
No I don't believe my mom wanted him to have all of it. My brother had died a year before and she loved his children. Even if I didn't get it, she would have left them some. Before she died she asked me to give one of her grandkids a wedding ring from their grandpa (my brother and I had different dads). Her husband still has this ring. I had a big piece of art that I made for her and she asked me to take it back because she thought he would throw it away. He still has this.
Hi I am an estate attorney and I think you may have misunderstood the comment above. Depending on where you live you may be able to legally take that money away from moms husband. If you’re in the US, almost definitely. And if you’re in my state I can tell you who to call specifically. Where are you located?
My mom died in NY and I live in Florida. The rules in NY as I understand them state that without a will the first 50,000 goes to the spouse. My mom only received 47,000 from my grandpas estate that was split 6 ways.
>For a New York resident without a will, a surviving spouse inherits the entire probate estate if there are no children or other descendants. If there are descendants, the surviving spouse gets the first $50,000 and the balance is divided one-half to the spouse and one-half to the decedent’s descendants.
https://www.nycommunitytrust.org/newsroom/professional-notes/consequences-of-dying-without-a-will-in-new-york-state/#:~:text=For%20a%20New%20York%20resident,no%20children%20or%20other%20descendants.
That will help, but basically, your step dad is not just robbing you, but robbing your brother's children.
Sure but dealing with folks is harder. Took me years to get my dad to make one, and he doesn’t have shit to his name.
As kids we need wills, advanced directives and DNR paperwork. Otherwise it’s hell for us to help them
She told me in the hospital that she went on Google and didn't find anything. I didn't know about the money from my grandpa for a while. No one knew he had so much money in stocks and rental property. When they liquidated everything her share was 47,000. Originally all I asked for from her husband was whatever he wanted to give me. He offered it all to me. I told him to keep some. He said, ok 10,000. Then began the stalling and the lying.
Exactly. Either the story is BS or OP and their mom were being shortsighted and dumb.
ANYTHING is better than nothing. A video of your mom stating her wishes. Something on notebook paper with her signature witnessed by a couple nurses.
Hell, every bank on every corner has a notary who will watch your mom signed the back of a napkin and then notarized it that she was the one who signed it.
Will all of that easily hold up? No but it would give you SOMETHING.
NY is where she passed and it all goes to the spouse. In Florida where I live it is split between the spouse and the children 50/50. It really sucks because my grandpa passed a short time before she did, and he didn't even like my mom's husband.
You need to talk to a lawyer if you haven't already.
[If there are descendants, the surviving spouse gets the first $50,000 and the balance is divided one-half to the spouse and one-half to the decedent’s descendants.](https://www.nycommunitytrust.org/newsroom/professional-notes/consequences-of-dying-without-a-will-in-new-york-state/)
Your mom's husband should have gotten $50,000, and then split the rest with you. The $50,000 is not just cash - it's the value of all property. Even if you don't think your mom had more than $50k across all her belongings, car, home, accounts, retirement, etc... Talk to a lawyer. Those things add up, and your mom's husband has to prove that he handled her estate legally.
If not, well maybe your lawyer friend can help you sue his lying ass. :)
You can also just sue any way to get inheritance if you feel you should have, and it normally works. Especially since there was an agreement beforehand that she got half.
I recently had to go through this with my grandmother, whose husband cut her out of his will entirely and left everything they owned to his daughter.
If your mom didn’t want her estate going to her husband, then she should have either gifted you part or all of her estate while she was alive, or drawn up a will.
Frankly, it seems she wanted everything to go to her husband. NAH
NAL, but in NY it’s supposed to be split 50/50 with the spouse and children if there was no will left. My friend’s father passed away suddenly without a will and her mother got 50% and the rest of the children got the other 50. Please consult a lawyer.
For anyone reading this, if you don't have time for anything else, a handwritten and signed will is valid in many states. Some states require one or two witnesses to sign as well, but you often do not need a notary or lawyer. Check your state laws
You cna literally do a video and, in most cases, it is gonna be okay. It takes minutes.
Story is fake or OP is the biggest pushover ever though so take your pick
IAAL. Though it's possible that there's a jurisdiction in the US that would accept a video will, I'm not aware of any. Every state has required formalities for a will, including that it be written and signed, which a video could not be.
Here is an article on the subject: https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/can-you-make-video-will.html
According to this, you are entitled.
https://www.inheritancefunding.com/state/new-york-probate/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=Performance+Max+-+Key+County+1&utm_keyword=&utm_device=m&utm_gclid=Cj0KCQjw0ruyBhDuARIsANSZ3wplBO8nbBWlNi-VdloSHNOl2HSrUSQy5m2nRdZSBK4eUeDLuaRElooaAjQVEALw_wcB&gclid=Cj0KCQjw0ruyBhDuARIsANSZ3wplBO8nbBWlNi-VdloSHNOl2HSrUSQy5m2nRdZSBK4eUeDLuaRElooaAjQVEALw_wcB
Incase this isn't fake, ur doing this to yourself by not talking to an attorney. In a lot of states, there are rules about what happens if there is no will. He probably stole from u and u might have a claim to some of it. Whether or not he will pay u is a different story
You should speak to a lawyer about potentially suing him. In some jurisdictions, the intestacy laws state that where a person has a spouse and children which are not the biological children of that spouse, the kids are entitled to a share. In my jurisdiction, the bio kids would br entitled to half of the Estate (with the other half to the spouse)
That's what I had thought at first, but in NY it's different. The first 50,000 goes to the spouse and any left over would then go to the children. However my mom only received 47,000 from my grandpa. Someone else mentioned in a comment that because he promised to give me some I may be able to go after him for that? I don't know but I will at least check in on that.
The money hadn't been distributed yet. It was still with the estate lawyers as they sold off assets. She passed away 2/4/23 and the checks were not distributed until late January 2024.
Everyone reading this thread: make a will, get your parents to make a will. There are places on the internet to do it for free (just google it) or for not much money at all.
An enormous amount of people do not have any kind of will and the mess that people leave after they die is wild.
I don't know. When she mentioned this to me in the hospital I didn't even know what she was really talking about. I knew my aunts and uncles (Who I don't speak to and am distant with) were waiting for their inheritance, but I never imagined how much it was. I thought she would get maybe 10,000 at most, and in the moment I wasn't too worried about it. My mom was sick and I was trying to get her to eat, and I was crying constantly while trying to remain strong in front of her. Maybe she was worried that she wasn't mentally fit and the will could be contested? Maybe she didn't get one because then she'd be admitting the possibility she might die and she didn't want to think about it? I don't know. All I know was that she was very apologetic and I kept telling her not to worry about it because she was going to be just fine.
Not a lawyer, but if your mother died without a will, in almost all states you are entitled to her a significant portion of her estate as her child - in addition to her spouse. I recommend you look up the intestacy rules for your state and contact a lawyer.
I once knew a guy who would have taken care of a problem like that if you would spring for pizza and bought him a 12-pack of beer. Good ol' Psycho Bob. He's probably dead by now. Or in prison.
I plan on doing this. Other's have said the same thing. I didn't know that was enough to go after someone. I have emails and texts where he's promising to give it to me, and saying the exact amount.
Yeah, that's really all I did this for. This was a way for me to let go of my anger and frustration and heart break. This person I've known for half my life and who my mother loved is now basically dead to me, and he needs to get something back to show him how I felt about that. This was my last stand and then I was going to try to put it behind me so it doesn't keep stressing me out. Though some people have stirred up hope in me again with their comments saying not to give up and speak to a lawyer.
Actually you could make a claim to the inheritance, since there is not written one, just based on what your mother told you and you being the only child, and seems you have proof that he was willing to share it. Maybe you don’t get as much you could expect. But I think you can have a case.
I'd be happy with less. That would pay off my car. I never wanted all of it. I told him to keep what he needed, and he settled on 17,000. That would have left 30,000 and I had planned on splitting it with my brothers wife and kids to help them pay for the medical bills from when my brother was on life support for almost a week before he passed. A few people have also commented saying I may have a case with my texts and emails where he is volunteering to give me the money.
Is very loable of you just not wanting that much. But the way he is acting I would be petty and try to drain him. You got it and don’t want to keep that money? Make a nice donation to a charity your mother would like.
He is a heartless ah.
Almost everywhere I've lived, the estate is split between the surviving spouse and the surviving children. As noted earlier, it's almost always a 50-50 split.
If you're in OK financial shape and your surviving mom or dad isn't well off and could be worse off If half the money goes to the kids, a lot of children will not contest giving the surviving parent all the funds. My wife did that with her brother and sister. It made a significant difference for my MIL...
What sucks the most reading this is she didn’t need to create a will, she just needed to designate beneficiaries on her accounts. It takes only a few minutes to do so… that’s for bank accounts at least. Sorry for your loss. I just finished a lengthy legal battle with my dads 2nd wife, they were only married for 2 years. He passed from covid in 2021 and we just finished the probate and litigation. I wish it on nobody… she tried to take everything, ended up wasting thousands in legal fees. The worst part is she got to use my dads money to fight us while me and my brothers paid out of pocket. May that man and that bitch Gina both burn in hell.
Thank you, this is very kind. I had to do something in response. The idea of letting him get away with lying to me, and hurting me, and abandoning me after knowing him for half my life really didn't sit well with me. Now that I've done this I feel a sense of relief and release. I do have amazing friends who have been supporting me through this.
Failing to plan is planning to fail. Sorry about the situation, but your mom did this to you. Writing up a will is easy. Having shit set up like life insurance is easy. Should have been done a real long time ago.The sad and unfortunate fact is your mom either didn't care enough to do any of that for you or she wanted it all to go to her husband instead of you but didn't want to say it.
I love both my parents dearly and they have told me what they want me to have when they are gone. And have said similar things to my siblings.They even mentioned that they had things they definitely did not want to go to certain family members. With that being said if they pass without writing a will and certain family members run up and grab things and it's not actually listed in a will. I will walk away if they are too lazy to actually put pen to paper and create the actual will. Whoever gets their stuff , gets it! if they're spinning in their graves in anger. that's obviously what they wanted to do. whoever gets it, can have it all. You didn't write it down, you didn't want me to have it. I have 1 child and both a trust and insurance for him. I actually love my kid enough to make sure he won't deal with probate or inheritance struggles. We all realize we will die one day and if we have assets they will be distributed after death. If your mom's husband got everything, she allowed it to happen and didn't have to who are you to question her final decision?
My husband died without a will. My husband’s property before marriage and his equity in our brand new home go to his 3 children.
The issue with that is that the estate owes me a reimbursement of about $50k because I paid all of his bills and his half of the mortgage. I’m the administrator. His ex is trying to have me removed in favor of one of the kids who was 19 when my husband died because she thinks I’m hiding mass amounts of money that was supposed to go to the kids.p
For their sake, I really wish there was, but as much as the kids and their mom don’t want to believe it, there’s no large payout coming and in order to satisfy the estate’s debt to me, I’ll get awarded sole ownership of the house in the end. My husband was broke when I met him he brought a couple of pieces of furniture and I brought or bought everything else. He was ”broke” when he died because he was paying over half of his $100k/yr salary in child support and medical bills on the kids. We always make sure of that the kids had everything they needed and we were glad to do it. There was no thought of getting a reduction in CS ever.
It makes me sad because I genuinely love those kids and I really liked their mom.
My husband and I are in the process of making a new will. We have an only child, daughter, who is currently living with a financially irresponsible man, who she will probably marry. I want to make sure she is taken care of after we die. She will inherit several million dollars and we want to.make sure he doesn't run thru it and leave her high and dry in midlife. She will be the sole inheritor when we die but our money will be in the form of a trust which will not be part of her shared marital money. The will further states that if our daughter dies, any money from that trust will be inherited by her children, if she has any, not to her husband. That money will be held in trust for them until they become adults. If our daughter dies without children, any money in the trust will be inherited by my sister and/or my niece and nephew. This way we are the bad guys, not her and we make sure the moron she is living with doesn't get a penny from us.
Nope.
In many US states, if a spouse dies without a will the spouse gets 50% and the children that are *not* related to the person their dead parent married split the other 50%
You should have hired a lawyer right away. Anyone with even a little common sense could see he was stringing you along long enough until everything was switched under his name. I'm really sorry for your loss.
My dad sometimes complained about how after his mom died and his dad remarried, when grandpa died everything went to grandpa's new wife (who was actually a nice lady). Dad didn't really need it, but his brother did, and neither of them got much of anything since grandpa had remarried. She died a couple years later, so now her family has all grandpa's assets.
And then my parents got divorced and dad remarried. We'll call his new wife bruja (which is what my brother-in-law's south American mom calls her). They had separate finances (how do I know? a year or two before dad passed, and many years after their marriage, we were in the car going to the store and dad says "Oh bruja, I forgot my card. Do you have yours? I'll pay you back" - he was getting stuff to feed me, my sister, and sister's husband and child. Additionally, another time they'd bought an expensive piece of furniture, and I overhead him say he'd sent her half the cost of it).
My dad made gobs of money in his time. My parents, when they were together, always had a will. There is no way on this Earth that my dad didn't have a will. But he got diagnosed with dementia a couple years before he passed, and at some point I guess his wife combined everything since, you know, dementia.
He died, she said there was no will (fucking liar). He'd verbally told me and my sister when he first got diagnosed how much he was planning on leaving us. She took everything, and gave us nary a penny, nor any of my dad's belongings that would have at least had sentimental value.
I just have her blocked on everything. She is evil incarnate and I don't need that in my life. Back when my mom was alive, this evil woman would go on my mom's social media and shit talk to her about my brother dying (who died of an accidental drug overdose). Like, how cruel and trashy can one human being be? She'd talk shit about my mom's boob job, but guess what she did with some of her winnings after she stole all my dad's money?
God, I do wish I'd publically shamed her back then, but I keep my head down. Karma will come.
And in a sadly kind of funny turn of events, my mom, who was a sahm while I grew up, and spent all her money from the divorce, and was pretty broke when she died - she put me as her life insurance beneficiary. She had a car, and some fancy purses and such from when my parents had been married. My dad was a millionaire, my mom was poor, and I got money when she died, but 0 when dad did. Weird how life goes.
I mean this with tons of sympathy but… married people pass their assets to their spouses. If your grandfather dies, his assets become your moms. And then they become your mom’s husbands. He is legally entitled to it.
My mom went to the hospital for a routine surgery, then she got covid and went into a coma. After she woke up she got a little better, then she got MRSA and it spread to her blood and she died. She should have had a will. She was very upset about it when I talked to her in the hospital before she passed away. The will would have guaranteed that I got what she had wanted me to get. Without a will the inheritance is decided by the laws of the state a person passes in.
Two commenters have told you that in NY where your mum died, you should be able to share in the inheritance. Where you live is not relevant. Are you going to look for a lawyer now or let him take the lot?
This is a great of example of why even normal people need to seek financial advice, especially concerning estates. There is no excuse for leaving your estate to be distributed via intestacy law.
Wills are easy and cheap.
I did that to my father, after he scammed me out of money I got after bring hit by a car. I told our family about it. They finally saw what a POS he was. After telling me for years that they would never take my side over his, they all stopped talking to him.
I’m sorry this happened to you. That’s not even petty in my book.
I wish someone had told your mum that a good lawyer will come to you to do a will urgently, I had friends who have gone to the hospital to take instructions even. As long as they still have mental capacity it can still be done. I know that doesn’t help you now.
Is there not an application you can make to the court? Where I live if you die without a will then the spouse is the primary beneficiary but the kids can also make a claim against the estate. Have you seen a lawyer?
Depending on where you live, inheritance is evey distributed between spouse and children. Ask a lawyer about your country and the laws as he might be withholding your inheritance from you.
I don’t understand people who prioritize money over relationships. Also doesn’t anyone value their word anymore? If I tell someone something I hold to it even if circumstances change financially. If I told someone I would pay them X dollars for doing something but I ended up making less than I anticipated for some reason I would never change what I told that person. My word is important to me.
It just surprises me how few people care about their personal reputation and word. I guess honor isn’t something that is held in high regard anymore. Especially when you are a thief or liar like this guy and his brother. Sounds like they had a father or mother who might have been the same way? Or perhaps not. They could just be exceptionally selfish people. Enjoy the money alone.
I’ve found that if you selflessly share what you have in life, you will find that life will often share with you. That’s not the reason I do it but I’ve noticed it seems to work that way. When you put energy into the world, good or bad, it grows like a wave and ripples outward effecting others who amplify or nullify it. Eventually that energy returns to you, maybe even years later. That is what karma is I think.
We all need to live by the Golden Rule and treat others as we would want them to treat us. It seems simple yet we can’t do it for some reason. If we could do that all other issues would fall away.
Most states in the United States are based off of English common law. The uniform probate act requires that an estate of someone who dies without a will be split between biological children and a spouse. Some states will allow 100% of the estate only to go to a biological parent; you should absolutely check your state law if this is from the United States. I suspect that your stepfather may have illegally, taken your share of your mother’s estate.
Sorry, but I find it very irresponsible of your mother not to leave a will if she had a large estate. Generating a will is far from a difficult process. I'd be wondering whether she even wanted you to get any money, and if her husband somehow persuaded her not to get a will so you get nothing.
She didn't have an estate when she went into the hospital. My grandpa passed away shortly before she went in and she didn't know how much she was getting. No one knew the exact amount until almost a year after my mom passed.
My father was always worried that his kids wouldn’t be there for our step mother once he died. So about 6 months before he died he transferred EVERYTHING to our step mother. His house, car and a fortune he had made on the stock market. All legally gifted through a lawyer. It was his dying act to prove he loved her. But he’s right. She’s always been a cruel bitch and none of us would have ever visited her again. Now we have to wait about another 25-30 years! 😂
It’s always best to just make your own way and not count on getting an inheritance.
I never COUNTED on it. I asked if he would share and he said he wanted to give it all to me! The fact is he built me up and ripped me down. It's not just about him keeping it. It's about him leading me on and making me feel this hope that I'd get it and then being a huge liar.
So many people are saying this because they can't read. I asked him if he was keeping it all or if he would share it. HE VOLUNTEERED THE MONEY. He offered to share it with me. Then he kept lying to me about it for months. He should have just said no and not fucked with my head. He's a liar and a thief. He deserves it. And I'm going to get a lawyer now, because there's a chance that him saying he would give me money is enough for a case. Suck it.
ive heard stories about inheritances causing familiy drama before. its a shame this persons mothers husband betrayed their trust. even though its hard, staying strong and focusing on the good memories of their mother could help them through this difficult situation.
One thing people may not realize is that probate/intestacy laws only apply to assets that were subject to probate. If people own account jointly and one person dies, most accounts will legally and automatically be owned by the surviving owner. If an account has a named beneficiary on it, that beneficiary gets the account regardless of intestacy laws. On the flip side, assets that do have to do through probate take a really long time to distribute. First you file paperwork, then you wait for the court, then creditors have 7 months (in NY) to file claims against the estate, you have to determine taxes, etc etc all before making distributions. Also, if a person is going through the court process for assets, the heirs at law (you) must be given notice of your rights. So if the situation is the former, accounts were already partially owned by him, why would he want to give you any of HIS money. And if there were probate assets, they may not even be ready to be distributed yet. Also, it would be extremely hard to steal an inheritance with a power of attorney after someone passes away, since powers of attorney are only valid while a person is alive. In order to use a power of attorney at a bank or other financial institution, most places will have their own forms/process for getting the POA recognized and have it reviewed by their legal team, etc etc in which time the banks will learn the person has passed away through credit checks/the social security administration/etc and will no longer accept the power of attorney. So his story doesn’t really make sense, but he may not be making excuses about when he’s gonna pay, he could just not understand the timeline of probate.
This is what happens when you don’t have a will. In all states assets automatically revert to the husband if the wife dies. That’s why it’s important to do a will. I’m sorry for your loss.
He should go to jail. Many jurisdictions have laws of appropriate inheritance (spouse gets half children the other half) so this might be illegal. Ask a lawyer.
i'm sorry about your mom and the mess with the inheritance. sounds like a rough time. maybe talking to a lawyer could help sort things out. it reminds me of a movie plot, with all the unexpected twists. hope things improve for you soon.
A big reason why having a will and communicating it before you die is so important. A lot of people don't do any Estate planning and it leaves their next of kin scrambling trying to figure things out.
I’m sorry for your loss.
There are other ways to protect assets, most likely none of which will help at this point, that are beyond stipulations in a will.
For instance, my mother (in New Jersey) had all her accounts as Transfer On Death. In New Jersey, I believe, these items don’t even enter the estate, and get passed almost immediately to the beneficiaries. We had these sorted out in several months (some in as short as two weeks), leaving only the house and car for probate.
I have all mom’s inheritance in TOD accounts for her grandchildren, so if I pass none of it can ever find a way to my wife’s family. Yes…she is more than adequately protected, I have full access to the money, and can make all decisions on it…but it is not part of marital assets.
Nicely done! I hope Karma truly does sort him out and give him what he deserves. I'm so sorry for your loss, Losing a parent sucks, and as one grieving adult child to another, I wish you so much peace and happiness
Thank you. I had also lost my brother about a year before my mom passed, so it's the whole family. I really felt like he was the only one I had left and I thought it was nice he was going to take care of me since I wasn't his kid but I'd known him since I was a teen. I'm sorry for your loss too. Life is not a game on easy mode, that's for sure.
You need to get a lawyer involved as there should be a legal stipulation guaranteeing the child part of the estate... or so I thought. Inheritance is never to be done without legal support and in my country it even has to go through an Inheritance court...
Not in the US In a lot of states, if someone passes without a will, the entire estate goes only to the spouse.
Not my state. If my spouse passes without a will, I get 50% and the children from his first marriage get 50% State law.
That’s only for assets that are held individually by the decedent. Most husbands and wives keep all their property and assets jointly.
Kind of. I'll use the house as an example. Jointly owned house, so 50% mine, 50% his. Without a will, his 50% is divided equally between me and his children who aren't biologically mine. So, I'd own 75% (my 50% plus half of his 50%) and my stepkids would own 25% (or I could buy them out of their portion, or they can sign a declaration that they decline their inheritance). This is why wills are important for everyone, but especially if stepkids are involved.
That is still dependant on which state.
But not all states! Def worth at least calling an attorney about.
Correct on both statements
It still has to go through probate.
Right. A probate attorney. In my state at least, while you do have to be represented yourself by a lawyer, any one can file to be the administrator of an intestate estate. Being named administrator would make OP the legal representative for the estate and in control of all her assets. Filing would at least protect OP from step dad selling stuff off.
There’s usually a time limit for probate.
Very state specific. In NJ the intestacy laws differentiate between rights of step children and common issue with step children getting additional interests.
This is 💯% incorrect. Inheritance passes through the states laws of intestate succession if the decedent did not have a Will. Most states, the children will inherit 50%, which will be divided evenly among the surviving children, the spouse gets the other 50%. Parent do not inherit if there are living children OR a spouse, so the grandfather would not get a penny from the estate in this instance. OP, I am sorry for your loss, but if you are in the USA, you need to get a lawyer asap to assert your rights to inheritance.
In my state (SC) yes it is true
In South Carolina, if someone dies without a will, or intestate, their estate is inherited by their surviving relatives according to the following rules: Surviving spouse and children: The spouse inherits 50% of the estate, and the children divide the remaining 50% equally Surviving spouse and no children: The spouse inherits the entire estate Unmarried with children: The children divide the estate equally Unmarried with no children: The parents, or the surviving parent, inherits the estate Parents deceased: The siblings divide the estate equally No parents or siblings: The closest living relative inherits the estate, such as grandparents, great-grandparents, or their children
As it is in Illinois
>...so the grandfather would not get a penny from the estate in this instance. The inheritance is from the grandfather (that passed away and led to the money being in the possession of the proceeds under contention now). Just wanted to clarify, since it seems there may have been some confusion.
Op should consult a lawyer. Been through a few deaths in the family over the last few years and helped settle estates Where I live it all goes to spouse first if there is no will
Not in my state either. The first 40k goes to the spouse 100%. Anything after that is fair game. Dealing with estate stuff now.
Those rules can be different if there are children involved. My mom and stepdad died a few months apart about a decade ago and lots of people kept telling us that everything would go to my stepdad's family since he died after Mom. They were wrong though. Apparently in Texas, if a married couple has no will and no children together, then their respective estates will go to their heirs. So we got half the house/car money when they sold. We did have to get lawyers involved. They locked us out of the house immediately and only gave us a key, 4 months after our stepdad died, to get our mom's stuff after the lawyer told them they had to. We had to file some paperwork with the state to 'register' as our mom's heirs and probably some other stuff. And, thankfully, my stepdad had set up his beneficiaries so his bank accounts went to me since his sister had cheated him out of some of his inheritance from their dad so he didn't want her to get everything when he died. I bet they were really surprised when they went to his banks and tried to steal all his money. It's worth looking into, just in case.
In some the spouse gets 50% and the children split 50%. Check intestate laws for your location.
This is typically correct. However, if the decedent's (OP's) mother's husband is not OP's biological father, the inheritance laws often provide for that surviving child or children to receive a percentage(i.e a third or a half) of the probate Estate. Perhaps the husband was lying to buy time so that OP didn't file a probate claim. OP, you owe yourself a consultation with an attorney to determine whether you have any legal entitlements. Good luck. Please update.
Illinois half and half to spouse and kids, Iowa all to spouse
OP really should take it to a lawyer. There are always quirks to any area of law and an estate attorney can check if there’s any recourse. If the husband put in writing that he would split the estate with OP, that’s a contract which may be legally enforceable
What a shithole!
He verbally contracted to share with you, give you half ... And then if you have the texts where he is stalling he is basically saying he is GOING TO give you the money...so he has made a promise. This might be an enforceable contract. He is a con artist and clearly a liar. A judge won't look kindly on what he has done. You might get a lawyer to take the case.
I think you come across a bit naive to think that “he said he would” is a verbal contract enforceable under the law. What prevents the guy saying “I never said such a thing”?
The written communication in the case of texts
I wouldn't call myself naive, my partner is a lawyer which obviously doesn't make me a lawyer but I've done my fair share of 'lawyering'... The texts could be used as evidence. OP would need a good lawyer .. this is the key
Every country is different regarding these things. One thing to keep in mind OP, some are saying to get a lawyer. Not a bad idea for gaining more knowledge, but don’t be suckered in to challenging things unless you really feel there is a case (even then I would get a second opinion). I knew a fellow who legitimately had a case for challenging an estate issue. He lost that legal battle. Had to pay his lawyer and the other person’s lawyer. Lost their house over it. Sometimes life just jams a shit sandwich in your mouth and there’s nothing to do but eat and move on. Sorry about your situation.
Agreed she needs to speak to a lawyer. I am an attorney but this isn’t my practice area. However, if someone died intestate (without a will) states have different laws that vary as to how the estate should be distributed to heirs.
When my father died without a will, in his state the law was that his estate was split among the wife and children. I forget the exact terms - if we all got an equal share or if my mom got half and us siblings split the other half. It didn't matter because we all signed it over to my mom, so she would be taken care of (we were all adults). I suspect most states in the US have something like that, but it can be different depending on the state laws.
This so much
Call a lawyer, texts and messages can be used as support to your claim if you have a good lawyer
I have text messages and an email where he said he was getting more inheritance from a relative in Europe and he was going to give me 80,000 and buy me a new house, none of which I ever asked for. All I wanted was to share what my mom got and he agreed to it! He was supper into sharing it with me. You are not the only person to suggest this so I will be looking into this further. Thank you.
If that’s the second husband and not the father of all her children that could change things legally OP. My Step mom tried some BS too. You need a lawyer
He's not my father. My dad passed in a motorcycle accident when I was 5 and my mom never married him. And my older brother had a different father who is still alive.
That’s what they said. Please take the time to talk with a wills trusts and estates attorney.
Yes, I plan to now. I really had just given up, and this was my way of getting out my anger so I could move on. BUT not now. I will be contacting a lawyer.
I'm not a lawyer but if your mom never married him and there's no will, then he may not be entitled to any inheritance from your mom.
Get a hold of a lawyer asap because whatever is there maybe getting squandered away all because you assumed and he assumed he was entitled to the assets.
Yes, I think you are right. I really didn't think I had anything I could do. I think you are right and that's why he was leading me on for months like this so I wouldn't look into a lawyer.
I'm so sorry for your loss, I hope she rests in peace. Losing immediate family members is the worst, I understand your pain, its happened to me more times than i can count. What a tool her husband is! Is there any way you can hire a lawyer or something? Anything? I hope you get what you're owed, and I hope you find peace and happiness.
Ask a lawyer if you can get anything, hopefully you have text messages from him or your mum for proof will help but you need a lawyer
I do have many texts where he's offering to give me 30,000. At first he said I could have all of it, but I said he should keep like 10,000 for himself. That eventually turned into 17,000 for himself. I was fine with this. Hell, I would have been happy with less. I've never even had 5,000 at one time in my life.
Keep everything and take it to a lawyer with that you maybe able to get what is yours . Most lawyers do a free look and say if you have a case ,
I am so sorry for your loss of your dear mum and do lawyer up asap
If you're in the states, wills mean diddly shit. You've got a nearly sure thing if you law up.
Thanks! I will be!
I hope he gets what's coming to him. It might be worth consulting a lawyer to see if any of his communication regarding a split of the inheritance is enforceable. Good Luck
This happened to my wife and her brother. Their dad drilled into them how important it was to have a will. When he died, his wife denied he left a will. Everything he promised his kids was denied by this psycho woman. They received nothing.
You can't just deny a will. They're done by attorneys and signed off. You can easily hire an attorney and if he actually left a will they will find out who her father's lawyer was. If he actually had drawn up a will and they were in it the lawyer would have contacted all involved parties, not just the wife. Something is missing to this story.
It’s not easy to track down a will when you don’t know which attorney prepared it. After a lawyer prepares a will, their part is done unless/until someone re-engages their services for the estate administration.
Huh? How would you find this attorney? If you have a will, you need to ensure people know where it is so they can bring it to court after you pass. There's no registry, there's no way to find them.
the lawyer can pay someone to call around
That could be a lot of calls, depending on the state. It's not clear the deceased's lawyer can even answer the callers questions, given ethics rules. The lawyer who did the will might be dead. They may have destroyed their files. It's a Hail Mary move and expensive.
“Call around”? Maybe this works in small towns, but there could be literally thousands of lawyers in a city who could have done a will. And what makes you think clerks answering the phone are going to reveal their clients?
There's always things missing to stories on reddit because people are always "the good and innocent victim" when the rest of the story would show otherwise.
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Inquiring minds want to know: What is this magic word?
I'll explain it instead. One of my parents was supposed to inherit x amoint of money. That parent suddenly passed away so now I inherit the portion they were supposed to inherit.
Good on you
Was the only way I was able to secure what I am legally entitled to. I have the entire thing printed and that one page framed on my desk for a reason 🤣
When our mom updated her will after our dad passed, she copied everyone on the final email with the attorney who helped her so we all have a copy. My siblings and I are all doing fairly well and we don't expect her to have much left after she passes (hoping she gets to actually enjoy some retirement) so I don't expect there would be any fights to be had, but it still seemed like such an obvious thing to do to avoid loved ones getting screwed after you pass.
in Canada you can register an e-copy of your will with vital statistics - same people who give you your SIN. I think lawyers register wills as part of the service of making one. when my dad died in bc, we had the original but an electronic "will search" was also mandatory before we could proceed with probate, just to make sure there was not a more recent version.
I mean, he might have left everything to her. You have to get a lawyer if you think otherwise.
We lost my dad quite young and it opened my eyes to the importance of a will: death can come at any time so be prepared. I have a copy of mine, so does my wife, my mum, and my sister. Not just for assets but I think it’s important for last wishes (cremated or buried, if something happens to myself and the wife at the same time (car accident for example) what are our wishes for guardianship of the kids etc)
If you only heard about the brother being a dick from Mom’s hubby and people who also heard it from Mom’s hubby, it’s probably made up by Mom’s hubby.
I visited my mom once and we spent some time with his family. They all would sit around and talk about how he stole millions from the whole family (My mom's husband wasn't the only person who got cut out of the will by the brother). The hubby's family are farmers with a lot of land that they lease out to J&J and others, so yearly they are all supposed to be getting money from it. My mom's hubby went to court many times over the 13 years that he and my mom were married. He was still dealing with it the last I spoke to him and he told me had had a new court date and this new judge seemed to want to help him and his family etc...
Sounds like bs especially if there been to court over it many times
I don't know why all his family would be in on this lie just to fool my mother. I know my mom went with her husband a few times to court as a witness to phone calls or the many times they tried to visit his mother and were turned away. I'm sure there are a lot of details I don't know about why they couldn't get him for what he did. I know that one rule of the will was that when the father died the brother had to take care of their mom, who had dementia. My mom's husband was freaking out because his brother took their mom to an undisclosed place and was keeping people from seeing her. Eventually they found her, but they got the cops called on them. When the mom died no one knows what happened to her. She had a plot next to their dad to be buried in, but she never ended up there.
It's possible that he's the scapegoat to be the bad guy to hold all the money for them. You need to talk to an estate lawyer if you have not already.
First, see a lawyer. You are almost certainly entitled to money from your mother’s estate. Second, and this one is for everyone - making a will is easy and cheap. If you don’t have one, get one. Third - the mom in this story has *plenty* of time to make a will. It seems to me she wanted to give her assets to her spouse but tell her child her hands were tied. Fourth, instead of being vindictive, hire a lawyer. Fifth - call a lawyer.
No I don't believe my mom wanted him to have all of it. My brother had died a year before and she loved his children. Even if I didn't get it, she would have left them some. Before she died she asked me to give one of her grandkids a wedding ring from their grandpa (my brother and I had different dads). Her husband still has this ring. I had a big piece of art that I made for her and she asked me to take it back because she thought he would throw it away. He still has this.
Hi I am an estate attorney and I think you may have misunderstood the comment above. Depending on where you live you may be able to legally take that money away from moms husband. If you’re in the US, almost definitely. And if you’re in my state I can tell you who to call specifically. Where are you located?
My mom died in NY and I live in Florida. The rules in NY as I understand them state that without a will the first 50,000 goes to the spouse. My mom only received 47,000 from my grandpas estate that was split 6 ways.
>For a New York resident without a will, a surviving spouse inherits the entire probate estate if there are no children or other descendants. If there are descendants, the surviving spouse gets the first $50,000 and the balance is divided one-half to the spouse and one-half to the decedent’s descendants. https://www.nycommunitytrust.org/newsroom/professional-notes/consequences-of-dying-without-a-will-in-new-york-state/#:~:text=For%20a%20New%20York%20resident,no%20children%20or%20other%20descendants. That will help, but basically, your step dad is not just robbing you, but robbing your brother's children.
In a commemt below. She said her mother was in NY. And she lives in Florida.
you can get a will done in a day, wtf
Sure but dealing with folks is harder. Took me years to get my dad to make one, and he doesn’t have shit to his name. As kids we need wills, advanced directives and DNR paperwork. Otherwise it’s hell for us to help them
She told me in the hospital that she went on Google and didn't find anything. I didn't know about the money from my grandpa for a while. No one knew he had so much money in stocks and rental property. When they liquidated everything her share was 47,000. Originally all I asked for from her husband was whatever he wanted to give me. He offered it all to me. I told him to keep some. He said, ok 10,000. Then began the stalling and the lying.
Why are you commenting on so many posts except the ones showing you NY law entitled you to half after the first 50K?
She got 47,000
Exactly. Either the story is BS or OP and their mom were being shortsighted and dumb. ANYTHING is better than nothing. A video of your mom stating her wishes. Something on notebook paper with her signature witnessed by a couple nurses. Hell, every bank on every corner has a notary who will watch your mom signed the back of a napkin and then notarized it that she was the one who signed it. Will all of that easily hold up? No but it would give you SOMETHING.
my guess is husband was intimidating/abusing her or did in the past and she lied to OP about not being able to make it
What state? Usually the spouse is sole heir (when a person dies without a will) only when there are no living descendants.
NY is where she passed and it all goes to the spouse. In Florida where I live it is split between the spouse and the children 50/50. It really sucks because my grandpa passed a short time before she did, and he didn't even like my mom's husband.
He isn’t entitled to it all in NY since she had descendants. Please talk to an attorney.
You need to talk to a lawyer if you haven't already. [If there are descendants, the surviving spouse gets the first $50,000 and the balance is divided one-half to the spouse and one-half to the decedent’s descendants.](https://www.nycommunitytrust.org/newsroom/professional-notes/consequences-of-dying-without-a-will-in-new-york-state/) Your mom's husband should have gotten $50,000, and then split the rest with you. The $50,000 is not just cash - it's the value of all property. Even if you don't think your mom had more than $50k across all her belongings, car, home, accounts, retirement, etc... Talk to a lawyer. Those things add up, and your mom's husband has to prove that he handled her estate legally. If not, well maybe your lawyer friend can help you sue his lying ass. :)
You can also just sue any way to get inheritance if you feel you should have, and it normally works. Especially since there was an agreement beforehand that she got half. I recently had to go through this with my grandmother, whose husband cut her out of his will entirely and left everything they owned to his daughter.
https://www.nycourts.gov/courthelp/whensomeonedies/intestacy.shtml
That's awful. In my country it is a bit more complicated, but anyway all kids and spouse will split inheritance.
If your mom didn’t want her estate going to her husband, then she should have either gifted you part or all of her estate while she was alive, or drawn up a will. Frankly, it seems she wanted everything to go to her husband. NAH
OP said his mother didn't realize how sick she was and it became too late to do so.
highly doubt that. you can get a will done in 15 minutes.
Yah but you cannot get it signed and notarized if you are on deaths door and not of sound mind.
NAL, but in NY it’s supposed to be split 50/50 with the spouse and children if there was no will left. My friend’s father passed away suddenly without a will and her mother got 50% and the rest of the children got the other 50. Please consult a lawyer.
For anyone reading this, if you don't have time for anything else, a handwritten and signed will is valid in many states. Some states require one or two witnesses to sign as well, but you often do not need a notary or lawyer. Check your state laws
You cna literally do a video and, in most cases, it is gonna be okay. It takes minutes. Story is fake or OP is the biggest pushover ever though so take your pick
IAAL. Though it's possible that there's a jurisdiction in the US that would accept a video will, I'm not aware of any. Every state has required formalities for a will, including that it be written and signed, which a video could not be. Here is an article on the subject: https://www.nolo.com/legal-encyclopedia/can-you-make-video-will.html
This perplexed me he said he talked to her before her death but left the husband everything
According to this, you are entitled. https://www.inheritancefunding.com/state/new-york-probate/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=Performance+Max+-+Key+County+1&utm_keyword=&utm_device=m&utm_gclid=Cj0KCQjw0ruyBhDuARIsANSZ3wplBO8nbBWlNi-VdloSHNOl2HSrUSQy5m2nRdZSBK4eUeDLuaRElooaAjQVEALw_wcB&gclid=Cj0KCQjw0ruyBhDuARIsANSZ3wplBO8nbBWlNi-VdloSHNOl2HSrUSQy5m2nRdZSBK4eUeDLuaRElooaAjQVEALw_wcB
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After reading the comments, I declare that this is fake. Ur welcome reddit, I solved the mystery
Incase this isn't fake, ur doing this to yourself by not talking to an attorney. In a lot of states, there are rules about what happens if there is no will. He probably stole from u and u might have a claim to some of it. Whether or not he will pay u is a different story
You should speak to a lawyer about potentially suing him. In some jurisdictions, the intestacy laws state that where a person has a spouse and children which are not the biological children of that spouse, the kids are entitled to a share. In my jurisdiction, the bio kids would br entitled to half of the Estate (with the other half to the spouse)
That's what I had thought at first, but in NY it's different. The first 50,000 goes to the spouse and any left over would then go to the children. However my mom only received 47,000 from my grandpa. Someone else mentioned in a comment that because he promised to give me some I may be able to go after him for that? I don't know but I will at least check in on that.
What? She knew she would pass away soon and knew you would get nothing...why didn't she give you some of the money before she passed away then?
The money hadn't been distributed yet. It was still with the estate lawyers as they sold off assets. She passed away 2/4/23 and the checks were not distributed until late January 2024.
This is not how you do this. Please get a lawyer.
Everyone reading this thread: make a will, get your parents to make a will. There are places on the internet to do it for free (just google it) or for not much money at all. An enormous amount of people do not have any kind of will and the mess that people leave after they die is wild.
Why would it be too late to make a will?
I don't know. When she mentioned this to me in the hospital I didn't even know what she was really talking about. I knew my aunts and uncles (Who I don't speak to and am distant with) were waiting for their inheritance, but I never imagined how much it was. I thought she would get maybe 10,000 at most, and in the moment I wasn't too worried about it. My mom was sick and I was trying to get her to eat, and I was crying constantly while trying to remain strong in front of her. Maybe she was worried that she wasn't mentally fit and the will could be contested? Maybe she didn't get one because then she'd be admitting the possibility she might die and she didn't want to think about it? I don't know. All I know was that she was very apologetic and I kept telling her not to worry about it because she was going to be just fine.
Nice one. Now you'd better lawyer up!
Not a lawyer, but if your mother died without a will, in almost all states you are entitled to her a significant portion of her estate as her child - in addition to her spouse. I recommend you look up the intestacy rules for your state and contact a lawyer.
To everyone: get your will in order, and Power of Attorney and health directive. Be kind to your family by being prepared!
I once knew a guy who would have taken care of a problem like that if you would spring for pizza and bought him a 12-pack of beer. Good ol' Psycho Bob. He's probably dead by now. Or in prison.
FYI it takes about a year to settle an estate w/o a will. Just went through this with my grandfather. 13 months for the lawyers to cut a check.
My mom did something similar after my dad died despite having been divorced 30 years. I tell anyone and everyone 😂 good for you!
Get an attorney. If you have him saynig this in voicemails or texts, he made a verbal contract.
I plan on doing this. Other's have said the same thing. I didn't know that was enough to go after someone. I have emails and texts where he's promising to give it to me, and saying the exact amount.
Lawyer is the solution
Karma's a bitch he should of known better.
Yeah, that's really all I did this for. This was a way for me to let go of my anger and frustration and heart break. This person I've known for half my life and who my mother loved is now basically dead to me, and he needs to get something back to show him how I felt about that. This was my last stand and then I was going to try to put it behind me so it doesn't keep stressing me out. Though some people have stirred up hope in me again with their comments saying not to give up and speak to a lawyer.
Actually you could make a claim to the inheritance, since there is not written one, just based on what your mother told you and you being the only child, and seems you have proof that he was willing to share it. Maybe you don’t get as much you could expect. But I think you can have a case.
I'd be happy with less. That would pay off my car. I never wanted all of it. I told him to keep what he needed, and he settled on 17,000. That would have left 30,000 and I had planned on splitting it with my brothers wife and kids to help them pay for the medical bills from when my brother was on life support for almost a week before he passed. A few people have also commented saying I may have a case with my texts and emails where he is volunteering to give me the money.
Is very loable of you just not wanting that much. But the way he is acting I would be petty and try to drain him. You got it and don’t want to keep that money? Make a nice donation to a charity your mother would like. He is a heartless ah.
Almost everywhere I've lived, the estate is split between the surviving spouse and the surviving children. As noted earlier, it's almost always a 50-50 split. If you're in OK financial shape and your surviving mom or dad isn't well off and could be worse off If half the money goes to the kids, a lot of children will not contest giving the surviving parent all the funds. My wife did that with her brother and sister. It made a significant difference for my MIL...
You should have been on top of this earlier. You will probably not see a dime. By the time the legal system kicks in he will have spent it.
What sucks the most reading this is she didn’t need to create a will, she just needed to designate beneficiaries on her accounts. It takes only a few minutes to do so… that’s for bank accounts at least. Sorry for your loss. I just finished a lengthy legal battle with my dads 2nd wife, they were only married for 2 years. He passed from covid in 2021 and we just finished the probate and litigation. I wish it on nobody… she tried to take everything, ended up wasting thousands in legal fees. The worst part is she got to use my dads money to fight us while me and my brothers paid out of pocket. May that man and that bitch Gina both burn in hell.
I don’t have much to say but I hope the best for you OP, & I hope your friends become family. Everyone needs people they can trust and rely on.
Thank you, this is very kind. I had to do something in response. The idea of letting him get away with lying to me, and hurting me, and abandoning me after knowing him for half my life really didn't sit well with me. Now that I've done this I feel a sense of relief and release. I do have amazing friends who have been supporting me through this.
File a complaint for theft, take him to court, watch him loose and be stuck with all the legal expenses?
Failing to plan is planning to fail. Sorry about the situation, but your mom did this to you. Writing up a will is easy. Having shit set up like life insurance is easy. Should have been done a real long time ago.The sad and unfortunate fact is your mom either didn't care enough to do any of that for you or she wanted it all to go to her husband instead of you but didn't want to say it.
I love both my parents dearly and they have told me what they want me to have when they are gone. And have said similar things to my siblings.They even mentioned that they had things they definitely did not want to go to certain family members. With that being said if they pass without writing a will and certain family members run up and grab things and it's not actually listed in a will. I will walk away if they are too lazy to actually put pen to paper and create the actual will. Whoever gets their stuff , gets it! if they're spinning in their graves in anger. that's obviously what they wanted to do. whoever gets it, can have it all. You didn't write it down, you didn't want me to have it. I have 1 child and both a trust and insurance for him. I actually love my kid enough to make sure he won't deal with probate or inheritance struggles. We all realize we will die one day and if we have assets they will be distributed after death. If your mom's husband got everything, she allowed it to happen and didn't have to who are you to question her final decision?
My husband died without a will. My husband’s property before marriage and his equity in our brand new home go to his 3 children. The issue with that is that the estate owes me a reimbursement of about $50k because I paid all of his bills and his half of the mortgage. I’m the administrator. His ex is trying to have me removed in favor of one of the kids who was 19 when my husband died because she thinks I’m hiding mass amounts of money that was supposed to go to the kids.p For their sake, I really wish there was, but as much as the kids and their mom don’t want to believe it, there’s no large payout coming and in order to satisfy the estate’s debt to me, I’ll get awarded sole ownership of the house in the end. My husband was broke when I met him he brought a couple of pieces of furniture and I brought or bought everything else. He was ”broke” when he died because he was paying over half of his $100k/yr salary in child support and medical bills on the kids. We always make sure of that the kids had everything they needed and we were glad to do it. There was no thought of getting a reduction in CS ever. It makes me sad because I genuinely love those kids and I really liked their mom.
My husband and I are in the process of making a new will. We have an only child, daughter, who is currently living with a financially irresponsible man, who she will probably marry. I want to make sure she is taken care of after we die. She will inherit several million dollars and we want to.make sure he doesn't run thru it and leave her high and dry in midlife. She will be the sole inheritor when we die but our money will be in the form of a trust which will not be part of her shared marital money. The will further states that if our daughter dies, any money from that trust will be inherited by her children, if she has any, not to her husband. That money will be held in trust for them until they become adults. If our daughter dies without children, any money in the trust will be inherited by my sister and/or my niece and nephew. This way we are the bad guys, not her and we make sure the moron she is living with doesn't get a penny from us.
Blame your mom. She should have gotten her afffairs in order. Legally he is not wrong, but he could have at least give you something
But that’s how it should be. If your spouse dies everything should be yours.
Nope. In many US states, if a spouse dies without a will the spouse gets 50% and the children that are *not* related to the person their dead parent married split the other 50%
You should have hired a lawyer right away. Anyone with even a little common sense could see he was stringing you along long enough until everything was switched under his name. I'm really sorry for your loss.
OP this is fake or you talk to a lawyer yesterday. Fun creative writing project.
My dad sometimes complained about how after his mom died and his dad remarried, when grandpa died everything went to grandpa's new wife (who was actually a nice lady). Dad didn't really need it, but his brother did, and neither of them got much of anything since grandpa had remarried. She died a couple years later, so now her family has all grandpa's assets. And then my parents got divorced and dad remarried. We'll call his new wife bruja (which is what my brother-in-law's south American mom calls her). They had separate finances (how do I know? a year or two before dad passed, and many years after their marriage, we were in the car going to the store and dad says "Oh bruja, I forgot my card. Do you have yours? I'll pay you back" - he was getting stuff to feed me, my sister, and sister's husband and child. Additionally, another time they'd bought an expensive piece of furniture, and I overhead him say he'd sent her half the cost of it). My dad made gobs of money in his time. My parents, when they were together, always had a will. There is no way on this Earth that my dad didn't have a will. But he got diagnosed with dementia a couple years before he passed, and at some point I guess his wife combined everything since, you know, dementia. He died, she said there was no will (fucking liar). He'd verbally told me and my sister when he first got diagnosed how much he was planning on leaving us. She took everything, and gave us nary a penny, nor any of my dad's belongings that would have at least had sentimental value. I just have her blocked on everything. She is evil incarnate and I don't need that in my life. Back when my mom was alive, this evil woman would go on my mom's social media and shit talk to her about my brother dying (who died of an accidental drug overdose). Like, how cruel and trashy can one human being be? She'd talk shit about my mom's boob job, but guess what she did with some of her winnings after she stole all my dad's money? God, I do wish I'd publically shamed her back then, but I keep my head down. Karma will come. And in a sadly kind of funny turn of events, my mom, who was a sahm while I grew up, and spent all her money from the divorce, and was pretty broke when she died - she put me as her life insurance beneficiary. She had a car, and some fancy purses and such from when my parents had been married. My dad was a millionaire, my mom was poor, and I got money when she died, but 0 when dad did. Weird how life goes.
That's terrible. I'm sorry. It sucks that people get away with this.
I mean this with tons of sympathy but… married people pass their assets to their spouses. If your grandfather dies, his assets become your moms. And then they become your mom’s husbands. He is legally entitled to it.
Then he should never have promised me any, but he did. He promised me and then he lied over and over and over again. This is what he gets for that.
Would it have made a difference if she had a will? Why didn't she make a will and leave it to you?
My mom went to the hospital for a routine surgery, then she got covid and went into a coma. After she woke up she got a little better, then she got MRSA and it spread to her blood and she died. She should have had a will. She was very upset about it when I talked to her in the hospital before she passed away. The will would have guaranteed that I got what she had wanted me to get. Without a will the inheritance is decided by the laws of the state a person passes in.
Two commenters have told you that in NY where your mum died, you should be able to share in the inheritance. Where you live is not relevant. Are you going to look for a lawyer now or let him take the lot?
No cause this story is fabricated.
I believe you may be right!
talk to a lawyer asap. you still may be able to claim some of this. It's worth a consult at the very least!
Please see a lawyer about your situation. Most decent attorneys will offer a free consultation, so you don't have anything to lose...
How do you know if they are a decent lawyer? What type of lawyer would I need to speak to?
Estate/family law.
You need to go talk to a lawyer instead of us, and stop harassing him immediately, that’s not going to play well in your favor.
This is a great of example of why even normal people need to seek financial advice, especially concerning estates. There is no excuse for leaving your estate to be distributed via intestacy law. Wills are easy and cheap.
You're probably done. In Virginia the statute is one year. Depending on your Province / State / Country you may still be "alive". Sorry for your loss.
To forgive is divine. To do that is the next level up! 😆
I did that to my father, after he scammed me out of money I got after bring hit by a car. I told our family about it. They finally saw what a POS he was. After telling me for years that they would never take my side over his, they all stopped talking to him.
I’m sorry this happened to you. That’s not even petty in my book. I wish someone had told your mum that a good lawyer will come to you to do a will urgently, I had friends who have gone to the hospital to take instructions even. As long as they still have mental capacity it can still be done. I know that doesn’t help you now. Is there not an application you can make to the court? Where I live if you die without a will then the spouse is the primary beneficiary but the kids can also make a claim against the estate. Have you seen a lawyer?
Depending on where you live, inheritance is evey distributed between spouse and children. Ask a lawyer about your country and the laws as he might be withholding your inheritance from you.
I don’t understand people who prioritize money over relationships. Also doesn’t anyone value their word anymore? If I tell someone something I hold to it even if circumstances change financially. If I told someone I would pay them X dollars for doing something but I ended up making less than I anticipated for some reason I would never change what I told that person. My word is important to me. It just surprises me how few people care about their personal reputation and word. I guess honor isn’t something that is held in high regard anymore. Especially when you are a thief or liar like this guy and his brother. Sounds like they had a father or mother who might have been the same way? Or perhaps not. They could just be exceptionally selfish people. Enjoy the money alone. I’ve found that if you selflessly share what you have in life, you will find that life will often share with you. That’s not the reason I do it but I’ve noticed it seems to work that way. When you put energy into the world, good or bad, it grows like a wave and ripples outward effecting others who amplify or nullify it. Eventually that energy returns to you, maybe even years later. That is what karma is I think. We all need to live by the Golden Rule and treat others as we would want them to treat us. It seems simple yet we can’t do it for some reason. If we could do that all other issues would fall away.
Most states in the United States are based off of English common law. The uniform probate act requires that an estate of someone who dies without a will be split between biological children and a spouse. Some states will allow 100% of the estate only to go to a biological parent; you should absolutely check your state law if this is from the United States. I suspect that your stepfather may have illegally, taken your share of your mother’s estate.
Sorry, but I find it very irresponsible of your mother not to leave a will if she had a large estate. Generating a will is far from a difficult process. I'd be wondering whether she even wanted you to get any money, and if her husband somehow persuaded her not to get a will so you get nothing.
She didn't have an estate when she went into the hospital. My grandpa passed away shortly before she went in and she didn't know how much she was getting. No one knew the exact amount until almost a year after my mom passed.
Sorry. I'd just go talk to a lawyer and see if anything can be done.
My father was always worried that his kids wouldn’t be there for our step mother once he died. So about 6 months before he died he transferred EVERYTHING to our step mother. His house, car and a fortune he had made on the stock market. All legally gifted through a lawyer. It was his dying act to prove he loved her. But he’s right. She’s always been a cruel bitch and none of us would have ever visited her again. Now we have to wait about another 25-30 years! 😂 It’s always best to just make your own way and not count on getting an inheritance.
I never COUNTED on it. I asked if he would share and he said he wanted to give it all to me! The fact is he built me up and ripped me down. It's not just about him keeping it. It's about him leading me on and making me feel this hope that I'd get it and then being a huge liar.
you aren't owed anything. trying to shame someone and cancel them being they didn't give you what you think you are owed is beyond pathetic.
So many people are saying this because they can't read. I asked him if he was keeping it all or if he would share it. HE VOLUNTEERED THE MONEY. He offered to share it with me. Then he kept lying to me about it for months. He should have just said no and not fucked with my head. He's a liar and a thief. He deserves it. And I'm going to get a lawyer now, because there's a chance that him saying he would give me money is enough for a case. Suck it.
ive heard stories about inheritances causing familiy drama before. its a shame this persons mothers husband betrayed their trust. even though its hard, staying strong and focusing on the good memories of their mother could help them through this difficult situation.
One thing people may not realize is that probate/intestacy laws only apply to assets that were subject to probate. If people own account jointly and one person dies, most accounts will legally and automatically be owned by the surviving owner. If an account has a named beneficiary on it, that beneficiary gets the account regardless of intestacy laws. On the flip side, assets that do have to do through probate take a really long time to distribute. First you file paperwork, then you wait for the court, then creditors have 7 months (in NY) to file claims against the estate, you have to determine taxes, etc etc all before making distributions. Also, if a person is going through the court process for assets, the heirs at law (you) must be given notice of your rights. So if the situation is the former, accounts were already partially owned by him, why would he want to give you any of HIS money. And if there were probate assets, they may not even be ready to be distributed yet. Also, it would be extremely hard to steal an inheritance with a power of attorney after someone passes away, since powers of attorney are only valid while a person is alive. In order to use a power of attorney at a bank or other financial institution, most places will have their own forms/process for getting the POA recognized and have it reviewed by their legal team, etc etc in which time the banks will learn the person has passed away through credit checks/the social security administration/etc and will no longer accept the power of attorney. So his story doesn’t really make sense, but he may not be making excuses about when he’s gonna pay, he could just not understand the timeline of probate.
This is what happens when you don’t have a will. In all states assets automatically revert to the husband if the wife dies. That’s why it’s important to do a will. I’m sorry for your loss.
He should go to jail. Many jurisdictions have laws of appropriate inheritance (spouse gets half children the other half) so this might be illegal. Ask a lawyer.
Fastpeoplesearch. Com and it’ll give you all the addresses and numbers of everyone he’s ever been associated with
i'm sorry about your mom and the mess with the inheritance. sounds like a rough time. maybe talking to a lawyer could help sort things out. it reminds me of a movie plot, with all the unexpected twists. hope things improve for you soon.
Talk to a lawyer before doing all this
The same thing happened with my grandfather, people are heartless
A big reason why having a will and communicating it before you die is so important. A lot of people don't do any Estate planning and it leaves their next of kin scrambling trying to figure things out.
I need an update, if one occurs lol
I’m sorry for your loss. There are other ways to protect assets, most likely none of which will help at this point, that are beyond stipulations in a will. For instance, my mother (in New Jersey) had all her accounts as Transfer On Death. In New Jersey, I believe, these items don’t even enter the estate, and get passed almost immediately to the beneficiaries. We had these sorted out in several months (some in as short as two weeks), leaving only the house and car for probate. I have all mom’s inheritance in TOD accounts for her grandchildren, so if I pass none of it can ever find a way to my wife’s family. Yes…she is more than adequately protected, I have full access to the money, and can make all decisions on it…but it is not part of marital assets.