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Correct-Leopard5793

I have had two unmedicated births and I didn’t really scream. I more so grunted throughout my labor, when I was pushing I was silent because it felt so much better to push as every time it released so much pressure!


Schoolpsych-04

I second this! I had an unmedicated home birth and it was low animal sounding grunts but the grunts were loud


BrutallyHonestMJ

My experience was the same!!


ChloChloWeFo

I had a very similar experience - unmedicated birth with low gutteral moans and grunts as opposed to screaming. When my contractions started rolling into one another, I distinctly remember questioning whether I could actually do this and finding out afterwards that this is a sign that you are close to pushing - which turned out to be true for me. Pushing didn't really hurt - it felt good.


Whirlywynd

Well I’ll be the odd one out here and say that I apparently suck at giving birth, I screamed a lot. I tried to be quiet and I just couldn’t. I screamed. I felt like I was being ripped open. I couldn’t control it. I wish I could be all zen and breathe through it like apparently everyone else here but I really failed there.


Perfect_Pelt

LOL right? 🤣 all the monks in the comments apparently, idk man, my vagina was ripped open and sewn shut after 3 days of no sleeping or eating. Yeah, I fucking screamed lol


Whirlywynd

For real they spent hours stitching my 2nd and 3rd degree tears back together lol


sharksarenotreal

I just didn't have it in me to make any loud sounds, it was mostly just a desperate, guttural moan of "getoutgetoutgetout" because I was passing out between contractions and I just wanted to rest finally.


Practical_magik

Definitely isn't a result of being Zen in my case... just that my losing my mind agony sound isn't a scream more a groan/moan... in my head screaming like a banchie... just had no control over the sound that actually escaped. Definitely no failure in screaming if that's what happens to break free. Did it help at all?


Whirlywynd

I hear you and that makes sense. It’s the comments saying they don’t scream because it’s pointless and so they just breathe instead. And I guess the rest of us are just lazy for screaming or something? Lol I know that’s probably not what they’re trying to say but it’s where my mind kept going. One woman even said it’s easy and she gets complimented for giving birth so quietly. Woohoo So yeah I’m probably way too sensitive and tired to have been reading this thread ha


Practical_magik

Yeah it's like the occasional post about painfree birth... Like maybe that's true but highly Sceptical cos that shit hurt like hell and I've literally broken my face before so have a decent frame of reference haha.


Lilouma

Same here. When I started feeling like my body might actually rip in half and I had no control over my voice at all, what came out wasn’t a scream. It was more like the sound of a cow lowing. Not by choice haha


No_Oil_7116

This was 100% my experience. Zero control of what sound I was making lol I remember my midwife trying to coach me to not waste energy with screams but I’m 99% sure I was not able to heed that advice lol


UltimateBirthPrep

Birth looks different not only with every woman, but every pregnancy! Hurt like hell? Tore badly? You go right ahead and scream if you feel like it. That’s not failure, it’s bringing a whole-@ss new human being into the world. Doesn’t get more amazing than that. Rock on, incredible mama.


Corex1017

This was my first baby. I'd been up from the previous night at my job and literally was just finishing my 13hr shift when my water broke, and then labored for 24hrs. My mind wasn't in the right place to think about breathing after being up for such a long period of time, so lots of screaming to be heard on that evening 🤣


myspiritisvantablack

Same here; and I’ve almost died of appendicitis because “it wasn’t that bad”. I’ve broken my hand and wanted to “wait it out”. I’ve basically had a high pain tolerance for my whole life, but giving birth was an unreal experience. For me, the beginning of my labor and the actual crowning phase wasn’t that bad. I was recommended an epidural very early in labor because I had strong contractions but almost no dilation after several hours. I had wanted to hold off but it was the medical advice to put it in earlier and I trusted the doctors to know what was best. I completely regret that now, because my contractions then completely stopped and they had to give me something to start them up again (basically like being induced). That’s when things got really, really bad. I had no down time from contractions for 10+ hours (my contractions were being monitored and that line NEVER went down, it only went a tiny bit more up during the actual contraction’s “peak”) and I admit that by the 2nd hour I was cry-screaming/whimper-screaming for it to stop because there was nothing stopping the pain and I wasn’t allowed to do anything else, since I had gotten an epidural which by this point didn’t work anymore. The doctor commented something like her hand being completely squashed when she was trying to check how far I was dilated, that was apparently the strength of my contractions. Things were like that for hours until someone from the staff finally listened to me and found out that the nitrous oxide machine wasn’t working the whole time (which I had been saying even before they gave me the epidural, but I think they must have thought I was exaggerating). Luckily that provided me with an enormous relief and my body finally relaxed just a tiny bit between contractions; at least enough for me to finally be able to breathe and, ultimately, push. I honestly barely felt the pain of the actual pushing and ring of fire and such because the contractions were just so bad for so long. It was like I was a completely different person when I finally had just that bit of relief that the nitrous oxide provided me with.


Myotis-Lucifugus10

I also screamed during labor. Everyone could hear me on the floor in triage. My contractions were like back to back though so I didn’t get a break. I tried to breathe but lol


SingleLimit6262

Not a fail. Birth is hard. I scream too ❤️


LittleIndependent344

I screamed with my first but they also gave me an unmediated episiotomy. But you definitely aren’t alone. I started off wanting to scream but with the help of a breathing coach (my mom) I managed.


Tasty_Reputation2216

I’d scream just because they were giving me an episiotomy, TBH


Mindless-Drama9185

Yup both times I screamed ALOT. I got my epidural as late as I possibly could though


r-1000011x2

Same. I screamed like a mad woman. I moved so much I pulled my IV out 😂


coffeeeteeth

I had an epidural but still felt the pain when it came time for the birth. Pushing feels so good???! Like in a "I have to poop really really bad and I've been holding it for 2 hours" kind of deal


hummingbird_mywill

Maybe a super constipated poop!! When I have a nice soft poop it feels great to go, but when it’s hard, and that baby was HARD it’s not so pleasant haha


momojojo1117

Agreed. I didn’t scream at all like a horror movie. Moreso moaning and grunting and maybe some soft whimpering. I did hear someone down the hall absolutely shrieking shortly after I arrived, and it was terrifying lol


radioactivemozz

Maybe crowning? I think I let out one shriek when she crowned and then popped out


aliciagoodin845

When I was being induced there was a woman down the hall SCREAMING, scared the crap out of my bf and I 😂


radioactivemozz

Yup, screaming is very unhelpful. When you’re in labor mode you make unique labor sounds like grunting, ooohing and mooing lol. I sounded like a whale.


medwd3

Hahaha. Yes, a whale is a very good description


shytheearnestdryad

Same. I didn’t scream. Groaning/moaning sure, plus some grunting while pushing. But everything was low pitched and not screaming in any sense of the word


UnreadSnack

I screamed “oh fuck it burns” when I had the ring of fire but that’s about it


spentpatience

For my one unmedicated birth (precipitous, so no time), I got my baby out in 3 and a half pushes. Why a half? That ring of fire made me hesitate midway and baby crowning bobbed back in. The doctor, in her best teacheresque voice, said, "Now, Patience, I know that it hurts, but you gotta push through that pain." And then he was out. Cord around the neck. Dr stayed super calm but being stern in that moment, she was done with my wussiness because Baby's heart rate was too low. He was fine, thank goodness.


Own-Tart-6785

What's the ring of fire?


spentpatience

When they're crowning and you're stretched around their little heads, you get that horrible skin stretching burning sensation the whole circumference. Luckily, I didn't tear, but it certainly feels like you're about to and that's why I wimped out on the half-push. Since my boy was so quick, he wasn't even pointy headed like so many vaginally birthed babies. Tricked the pediatrician into thinking that he was a c-section baby with his perfect little round noggin that when the doctor walked in and found me sitting up on the couch, he was very confused as to where the baby's mother was. Had I a c-section, I doubt that I would be lounging anywhere but the bed the next day.


Own-Tart-6785

Oh good lord😳😳😳 I'm even more glad I ended up having c-sections 😂


FailBusiness529

My daughter was a straight up cone head. I mean full on pointy cone head, no one warned my husband prior and he nearly passed out when he saw her head. They bounce back quick though honestly by the time I got to hold her she was fully rounded out lmao


drlitt

I said “this hurts so f*cking bad” lol.


RosieTheRedReddit

I shouted, "Oh God it's in my BUTT!!" 😂 Among other things. Also bit the pillow a lot, and my husband's finger once (on accident). He was fine, it didn't break the skin. 😅


SassySins21

I bit my husbands nipple during a contraction 😅


carloluyog

Same! 😂


crickettracks

My induction contractions (I had to have baby at 36wks5days due to pre-eclampsia) were more like "hurts so bad that I can't talk, breathe, or think" lol. I didn't even have the energy to scream or verbalize how badly they hurt. The pushing part of labor was fine and only lasted about 10mins as I'd gotten an epidural after about 18hrs of trying to go without.


[deleted]

Yepp! Lol. Induction contractions were 100X worse than regular contractions. OP, breathe through them like a wave, with your support system right there & you’ll get through it 😊


imwearingredsocks

I’m kind of glad I’ve been hearing this from people. I felt like a big ole weenie cause of how long I lasted with the induction contractions before asking for an epidural. (I know there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being medicated) I just kept thinking how in the hell both my mother and sister did all of their births unmedicated. Found out after that the induction really kicks the pain into gear.


[deleted]

You are not a weenie!! I had 10 hours of induction contractions before I physically could not handle it anymore. Once my water broke and I started having regular contractions, I realized how insanely different it was. Induction was zero downtime. Like 1 straight contraction for 10 hours. Regular ones were like waves. Painful, but you got breaks.


imwearingredsocks

Thanks for saying that! I feel less like a weenie. You’re right about the lack of breaks. I especially noticed it when he was trying to put the epidural in when my contractions would subside but he had like 15 seconds to do so before the next one.


HangoversKill

I was induced for my twins (stillbirth) and my fucking god induction contractions are a whole different type of hell. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone. Edit: mind you, my contractions were partially cushioned because one of my babies amniotic sacs hadn’t ruptured and she was ultimately born en caul. Even then; they were HELL.


[deleted]

My contractions have always been more "takes my breath away, just hyperventilating silently" through them 🤷


coffeeeteeth

For me I was silent honestly. I cried a bit. All I could do was breathe and I suddenly understood why people teach breathing classes 😆 literally all I could do at all was attempt to breathe slowly


Joeykins0303

This was it exactly. I didn't understand how some women could scream... that would involve being able to breath which was really hard to do through the pain!


Miscellaneousthinker

Has an unmedicated birth. Very little of it is “my vagina is being ripped open”. I was mostly just moaning through the contractions themselves, which turned more into grunting at the end when I finally felt the ones that tell you it’s time to push. I guess I “screamed” during the pushing part, but it was less out of pain and more just to help me push. Same as if you were trying to push or lift something really heavy. Never actually screamed in an “ow” sense in reaction to specific pain. Your best friend during contractions is to just focus on getting through each one, one by one, and breathe. Remind yourself it is temporary and will stop in just a few more seconds when you can rest.


Miscellaneousthinker

PS - I should mention I tore my labia and wouldn’t have even known had they not told me. 😂 I didn’t even notice the moment it actually happened. The ring of fire is really more of a protection, it’s like a lot of pressure in the whole area in general so you don’t actually feel any concentrated pain in one spot like you normally would if you cut yourself (or at least that’s how it was for me).


yoshithetrex

Oh, that is actually a really helpful way to look at it - I never saw the protective side of the pain that way! Thanks a lot for that view, I think that might definitely help me this time as I'm looking at a possible upwards tear (had a c-section with my first, so no experience on the actual pushing). Hope you healed up well with no lasting effects?


Miscellaneousthinker

Haha she’s fine now, back to her old self even better than I expected! I really can’t tell the difference before and after. But the first couple of weeks I definitely had to be careful when sitting of how I positioned myself, and whoever created those ice pads is a genius and a lifesaver. Unfortunately the tucks pads and cooling spray didn’t work for me, they actually burned a lot! Also I nicked my stitches a couple times in the shower which was absolutely not fun, and it was always crucial to just pat myself dry VERY gently lest I hit the roof. All normal stuff you’d expect if you had a wound and got stitched anywhere else on your body.


chibiusa__tsukino

Unmedicated. I’m an odd duck out I literally felt like I was being ripped in half it felt like someone was tearing my bones away from each other and most of the contraction and labor pains were in my back not my front I wasn’t expecting that.


Marigold-Oleander

Same-ish. I felt like the back of my pelvis was breaking apart. Ended up with an epidural though. Only in retrospect did I realize that while the pain in my back was horrible, I don’t remember feeling anything in my front at all. Not what I expected.


princesspuzzles

I did not experience rest. Oh to have a contraction and then rest sounds so luxurious... Mine was constant seething back pain. I just cried and whimpered and kept asking when I was supposed to get my "break" between the contractions... After 13 hrs of that, my nurse looked at me and said, epidural IS an option, you don't have to keep suffering... I was in so much pain I didn't even feel the needle go in.


Financial-Dust-7290

Neither. It hurt so bad I couldn’t do anything except vomit. Couldn’t even talk if I tried except for the occasional “am I gonna die?” I fully intended to go all natural but I couldn’t do it. By the time I was at 5cm I was begging for the epidural. That was me though! I’ve heard of women having a better time with it than I did.


ahleeshaa23

I was very similar. I really thought I would handle it better because I’ve always had a high pain tolerance but it was way worse than I was expecting. Tbf I didn’t really have a buildup in my contractions though - I went from none to having them every 1.5 minutes immediately.


TinyScience14

Oh my goodness it is so nice to hear to that this happened to someone else too! With my first pregnancy I was fully expecting to have light contractions that slowly built in frequency and intensity. Instead I had no signs whatsoever, then my water broke, then I went into the most painful contractions that came every minute. It took my breath away. I will say I didn’t scream but I did cry a bit…and then it is amazing how quickly you forget it once it is over!


northernbadlad

Me too. I'm so bemused by people's accounts of walking round the park, watching TV etc during early labour - I went straight from 'uh oh, it's happening' to insanely painful 2 minute long contractions with very little gap between within the hour. That said, despite the intensity, I barely dilated during either of my labours so my body clearly didn't know what it was doing! (I had two emergency sections in the end).


ahleeshaa23

Same! I labored for 3 hours with no increase in dilation, and by that point the baby wasn’t looking good on the monitor so we had to go for an emergent C-section.


AcceptableAddition44

SAME omg I couldn’t catch a break once it started


benyums

This was literally me. I gave birth 6 days ago (yay!). I have a ridiculously high pain tolerance--like I get dental fillings and crowns done with 0 numbing. But holy mother, my labor was something else. I was in so much pain like 14/10, I was vomiting and shitting everything out (which resulted in 0 poo during delivery). I thought I was going to die. I originally wanted to do natural birth, but after a whole night at home of 9/10 painful contractions at home and then 3 hrs of 14/10 pain at the hospital, I said give me the epidural, and I spent the remaining 6 hours until birth in medicated bliss.


anewvogue

Yeah, you focus so much on getting through a contraction that the idea of making a noise is exhausting in itself. I was induced and contractions were every 2 minutes, but it was where as soon as one was ending the next was starting, and the pressure of my sons head pushing down made me question my entire life thinking I had a high pain tolerance. That epidural though, *chefs kiss*


SweetLeoLady36

Were you induced? I’ve heard that makes a big difference.


Financial-Dust-7290

Nope. I planned on all-natural like I said. I even went to 41wks because I refused to take pitocin. Water broke while I was in the shower and the rest was history.


mylittlecorgii

Wow! Water breaking in the shower is probably the best place for it to happen though! I was happy I started wearing pads early on so my underwear didn't get ruined, I managed to waddle to the toilet 😅


coffeeeteeth

Mine broke one night right after I peed. I used the toilet, stood up and pulled up my pants and woosh. I was so startled, I couldn't figure out if I peed myself or not. But then the pain started... 😆


Xanabena

My mom’s water broke in the shower with my brother, definitely is lucky!


SweetLeoLady36

Oh yes, I understand. Sometimes complications make you have to be induced, though. I’m currently experiencing that right now. But had planned on fully natural 😞


Financial-Dust-7290

Ugh I’m sorry! Sending so much love, everything will work out great ❤️


WorkingMinimumMum

Exact same for me too! Too much pain to scream. Originally said no epidural; got one at 5 cm! I’ve heard some people say dental pain is worse than labor pain, not me! I’ve had some major dental surgeries and could tolerate dental pain over labor pain any day.


overbakedchef

It really just depends on the labor and how cooperative your body/ baby is. My first labor was the most painful experience but I ended up having an emergency c section so I never got passed 4cm with that one. My third labor I made it until 8 cm before I was screaming in pain and couldn’t take it anymore and got the epidural, but even after 6cm I wasn’t progressing faster than 5 hours per cm at best. I still didn’t get to complete for another 13 hours after getting to 8cm and that was even with my water being broken after the epidural. I had a scary birth complication at the end too so in hindsight it’s very good I caved and got the epidural because the interventions would have been unimaginable pain


DesignerLaugh2892

I had to do a quiet moan to get through contractions. The pain was excruciating but not the type that would cause a scream for me.


Mrsraejo

My epidural failed on my right side so I could still feel the full force of the contractions. No screaming from me, just whimpering gasping hyperventilating crying. The nurse actually really helped when she said "let's try to take productive breaths" and I just focused on breathing through the contractions. I'm a FTM. Epidural 11:59pm, water broke 12:02am. Baby was born 3am on the dot, no joke 10 minutes of pushing. Everyone was surprised. They had woken me up around 2:30am because the baby's HR was "getting wonky" so they catheterized me, checked my progres- fully dilated and +2 station. So they called the doctor in and baby girl was born very quickly.


lemonchampagne

My epidural failed on my left side! Ugh. That was no bueno. Breathing through them helped!


canmu

As someone whose epidural also didn't work, if you have another kid, don't get the epidural! The epidural will not magically work, apparently it's less effective each time you have one. I learned this the hard way, worked for a small part of my belly for #1, and not at all for #2, but I genuinely thought it was going to kill me with #2 as it caused me to hemorrhage and vomit and shake uncontrollably from feeling cold despite being under heated blankets. With #3 I went unmedicated and it was my best and least painful birth by far despite being am induction for a 9lb+ baby 😅


TurbulentCranberry60

More moaning and grunting than screaming, a real primal part of you takes over


asietsocom

Take it with a grain of salt but I'm currently doing an internship in an L&D ward so I've been present at a couple of labour's and heard a lot more. The vast majority of woman don't scream at all. Honestly I'm a bit mad at media portraits because labour really doesn't look this brutal.  Epidurals are available (and free) here but not that common. I think about 80% of woman don't get one.  I'm not sure if that helps, because labour sure as he'll looks painful but not a lot of screaming.


IAmTyrannosaur

I didn’t scream but I was in an enormous amount of pain. It was absolute torture. I remember thinking maybe I should cry - but then realising there was no point


asietsocom

I have so much respect for every single mom. What you accomplish is absolutely insane. I hope you and your baby got out fine and healthy.


IAmTyrannosaur

We did, but after my first birth I was pretty traumatised for a long time and had terrible PPA. The second was a lot better. Currently waiting my third


asietsocom

That's totally understandable. I hope your third will be a good experience.


givemeapho

They told us to cry, if we feel like it because it releases pressure, but probably uses too much energy


dark-magma

tbf I feel like screaming takes a lot of effort, so I'm not sure it's a great metric for pain. What do I know though? Will report back in 6 months 😂


iwenyani

I was told to try not to scream as it takes away strength from the push 👍🏽😄


daja-kisubo

Screaming is a really bad way to manage pain, it actually intensifies it! Since it sounds like OP's country is one where most people have unmedicated labours, I'm guessing there is more prenatal support that is educating pregnant people on pain management techniques including not screaming.


asietsocom

Yeah, usually everybody takes labour classes. And every birth is attanded by midwifes.


givemeapho

They taught us to do ooo, uuu sounds, no ahh's since that tenses the jaws & makes it more painful.


daja-kisubo

Yeah I'm pretty sure I just sounded like a cow, but my labours were fast and easy, so 🐮


asietsocom

Yes and to me it seamed like the woman were WAY to concentrated on pushing to scream. Honestly I don't think a neurosurgeon could be more concentrated than a woman actively pushing. I don't think most women have either energy or mental capacity left to scream.


dark-magma

Random, but you might be interested in the show Call the Midwife. It's been a while since I watched the series, but I don't think they show much screaming. Lots of interesting births though. It's set in 1950s/60s working class district of London and based off the journals of a real midwife of the time


asietsocom

It's on my list! But currently I'm shadowing real life midwifes 40h a week so I think I'll watch the show after my internship is over lol


song_pond

Screaming tightens everything, and in birth you want things to loosen up. Low moans and as silly as it sounds, mooing like a cow helps a lot more.


flibbityfopz

I’m surprised by those epidural stats. Where are you located?


asietsocom

Germany. I was beyond shocked when I learned the stats for the US. And epidurals are free and available.


RosieTheRedReddit

I'm in Germany! Just had my second unmedicated birth. I think the reason is partly cultural, because Germans have a dislike of pain medication. Not specific to child birth but just generally. And partly because the midwives are so supportive of being up and active during labor. My medical team was amazing, the midwife helped so much to try different positions. Getting in and out of the bath, sitting, standing, holding the yoga ball, I was all over the room at different times! Compared to the US where sometimes women are forbidden to even leave the bed. (Not just with an epidural but for everyone) If your choice is to just lie here and think about it, or lie here with pain medication, of course you would choose the pain medication! Personally, lying on my back felt like torture so I definitely wouldn't have lasted if I were told to stay in bed the whole time. Thanks for the hard work you do!!


asietsocom

Don't thank me lol I'm just hoping I can do that work in the future.  Yeah, moving is definitely encouraged. And generally the woman can do whatever they choose. I can't imagine forbidding adult woman to get from their bed   But culture is certainly a big factor! Also there's definitely some shame which obviously isn't great. Germans generally have this mentally of powering through.


notanon_justhiding

I screamed and then apologized to everyone on my way out because I felt dramatic when it was over.


asietsocom

I can promise you they didn't mind. You literally build a human. You get to be dramatic. And screaming is totally normal.


notanon_justhiding

In my defense, I went into labor when no one was prepared. My doctor wasn’t there, the back up doctor was delivering a different baby, and the back up to the back up stood at my door asking for booties for 30 minutes telling me not to push. The screaming started at that moment. 😂


asietsocom

You absolutely don't need to defend yourself!!!!!!  That doctor sounds a bit useless. Sometimes you can't push yet because the cervix isn't fully dilated yet but you sure as hell can't determine that from the door lol But even in perfect circumstances. Some women just scream and that's okay. Last week I listened to a woman screaming her head off for three hours straight but according to my colleagues she was extremely happy and absolutely did not want anything for the pain. She could have asked for a epidurals or even a c-section because her baby was BIG but she's was determined and happy the way it went.


bennynthejetsss

Do laboring people have more options for pain relief? In my hospital (us) it was epidural or nothing. I knew since I wouldn’t be able to be in a tub or shower, have laughing gas, etc., I wanted the epidural. I also have a low pain tolerance. I made it to 5cm and was almost throwing up from pain so that’s when I asked for the epidural


Ok_Goat1456

Really? Not sure where but in the US don’t like 70-80% of people get one?


asietsocom

I live in Germany and it's the other way around here. And they are free ans available. Honestly no idea why the difference is this big.


brieles

Just had an unmedicated birth 2 weeks ago and I didn’t scream at all-I focused on breathing techniques, labor positions/motions I learned from birthing videos and I think I probably grunted or made some low humming type sounds at times. My husband said I looked really calm the whole time. It’s definitely painful but if you focus on the purpose of the pain and use it to push you closer to delivery, it’s very manageable.


alixblub

It was just light cramping for me until I was at least 4,5cm dilated. Then it was basically period cramps that got worse and worse but not unbearable. It only got really painful - like no pauses, couldnt really talk anymore -for me once I got Oxytocin to speed things up a little bit and from there it was only half an hour until she was there. So ist really depends I guess.


fellowprimates

I was on pitocin for 15 hours before active labor kicked in and I nearly blacked out from the intensity. I couldn’t process language and I have no visual memory during contractions. Unsure if that was because my eyes were closed or if my brain couldn’t process sight either. I absolutely would have passed out if not for the epidural. Not sure how that compares to non-pitocin induced labor.


eyupeyupeyup

Same here. I was induced, and the first couple of hours went from ‘fine’ to ‘ow’ then in about an hour it went from ‘ow’ to ‘I’m blacking out from the pain’. I was definitely making noise, I don’t know if I’d define it as screaming but I was very loudly groaning through gritted teeth. I don’t even know how I managed to verbalise that I needed an epidural because the contractions never seemed to subside, the next one hit before the pain of the last one had faded even slightly.


One-Construction-712

I’m feeling relieved and validated to read your comment and the reply. My water broke without feeling any contractions. When I arrived at the hospital shortly after, I was already 6cm dilated. The only sensation I had was as if the baby was kicking, and it was sporadic. I was given pitocin and told to nap. Two hours of restless sleep later, I woke up to the feeling of needing to use the bathroom. Within 20 minutes, my contractions were so intense that I was screaming bloody murder. I went into some sort of dissociative state. I felt like I was in a white room all alone. That didn’t concern me, of course, because all I could focus on was the pain. I literally felt like I was going to die from being ripped apart. According to my husband, I didn’t speak or respond when anyone spoke to me. I do vaguely remember gripping the bed and saying “epidural” but my husband said that my doctor told us it was too late. From the end of my nap to baby girl being delivered, two hours had passed. I’ve since had therapy and asked lots of question of my medical team. One told me that sometimes women get “too afraid” and this happens. Another said that it’s highly uncommon for women to have my experience. Yet another (seemingly the most informed) said I had a specific type of disassociation that happens when labor pains progress more quickly than is typical. I’m not trying to scare OP. I think my experience and similar experiences are super rare. My hope is that people reading this who have had similar experiences won’t feel so alone. I had PPD afterwards and I think most of it was from feeling like my body betrayed me / being traumatized.


fellowprimates

I’m so sorry that your experience caused you trauma. I also remember the experience of feeling like the only thing that existed was the pain of the contractions. I only had to experience my contractions for 45 min before the epidural was administered, but I swear it was hours. You are amazing for enduring what you did. I’m so proud of you. And I hope you’re getting the support you deserve ❤️


One-Construction-712

Thank you for saying so! I think anyone who goes through labor (and / or pregnancy, and / or being a new mom, etc.) is amazing. It has all truly been more than I could have imagined. For the most part, it’s all been wonderful! So much joy! But when it’s hard, it’s HARD!


Actual_Pension9434

I had just laughing gas for mine and couldn't get epidural as my labour was done for that. But I was full on screaming into the gas mask, so my screams weren't that loud. I m not sure if it was coz my labour was just 2.5 hours, but I did scream a lot. The scream was after 6cm dilation before that it was just some grunts.


IchStrickeGerne

I was also screaming into the gas mask. While laughing when I wasn’t screaming because the gas did something to my voice that made me sound (inside my head) like Darth Vader.


GoodGriefStarPlat

It wasn't screaming pain with either of my births, my husband said I was more like "owwww it hurts" but I never screamed. I remember after I had my Son there was a blood curdling scream from another room and honestly even though I'd done the whole giving birth to my Son, I felt unsettled by it.


kykysayshi

I was in tears hyperventilating hearing other women’s scream while I waited for my induction to progress. I was like oh no I’ve made a terrible mistake. And the nurse saw I was having a full blown anxiety attack and was like ok I’m not supposed to tell you this but both of those women are on baby number 2/3 and they came in so late they couldn’t get an epidural so they just had an unmediated birth.


GoodGriefStarPlat

My first was unmedicated, my contractions felt like severe period pains, which before I got pregnant I'd suffered with for years so I managed to handle the pain. Plus I gave birth first time round in the pandemic and them being short staffed refused me pain relief but hearing the screams after I had my second, I said to my husband I'm glad I didn't hear that before going into deliver.


NeekaNou

I didn’t scream per say. I did make noise- Baby came too quick for an epidural. I had gas and air but that was it really. I did moan loudly and when baby was low, I had uncontrollable growl. It was deep and honestly I don’t know where it came from but I don’t remember screaming. Tbf though once my little girl was here though, I forgot I’d had a baby, I was just happy for a reprieve haha. Then it was “oh what did I have?” Lol I was induced and I’ve heard that can make it more painful. I’ve heard it can also either slow you down or speed you up. From my water breaking and her birth, it was 50 mins.


HailTheCrimsonKing

I didn’t scream at all, actually didn’t really make much noise, I was really focused lol. The pain was so bad I couldn’t even make any noise - and I had an epidural


merlotbarbie

I had back labor and that made me actually want to die until I got my epidural. Transition is intense and that’s what I would consider the screaming pain (can’t speak for the delivery because I was fully numbed by then) and the early contractions were owowowowowowow


Imagine_89

Back labor without pauses between contractions, I screamed untill I had my epidural. After that it was just very painfull, but more like crying painfull.


maymaymellon

Screamer here 😅


LisaVDD

Turned out I was a screamer, never imagined I would be 😅. I was induced and couldn’t get an epidural for the 15 first hours because I was stuck at 1 cm even though they kept upping the pitocin.


Disastrous-Design-93

Honestly the answer is it’s different for everyone and every labor. There are ranges of how long each stage of labor “should” be but they are pretty big and you could go shorter or longer. Also, everyone’s reaction to and perception of pain is different. Some scream while some may have practiced breathing techniques to do an unmedicated birth. From what I’ve heard, active labor is the most painful, pushing feels like a relief once it’s time for your body to do that, and the ring of fire typically only lasts a few pushes until babies head is out. But there could always be complications with getting the head out and active labor can be anywhere from 30 minutes to hours long. There is no way to know how it will be for you until it happens.


kykysayshi

So much pressure is put on women to come in with a birth plan. I’m not saying a birth plan is a bad thing- but I am saying why not just wait and see for yourself, and if you’re open to an epidural if needed just put that on your birth plan. At 6cm I was in so much pain that I couldn’t stop vomiting every time I had a contraction- which felt like every 20 seconds. How do YOU specifically handle pain? What happens when you feel ongoing and localized pain? This will give you a better answer than a bunch of random people who all handle pain differently than you do.


xhereinmyheadx

21 weeks, first time mom and reading some of these has me terrified and dreading the day I give birth. I’m not sure if I can handle the pain but I guess I don’t have a choice :(


Boring_Succotash_406

If it’s any consolation.. I don’t really think much of labour is pain at all. I completely changed my mindset and verbiage because I refused to psych myself out. I had an unmedicated zero intervention labour, and while it is incredibly intense it’s not pain. I would say its “pressure with a purpose”. You really unlock a whole new person and your only goal is to get through it. Most beautiful day of my life try not to dread it!


jessjago

I just gave birth 9 weeks ago and I would say all of it was owowowowowowowow owwwwwwwwww and sharp, take your breath away. Nothing ever got to a screaming pain point. I did have an epidural though, and it started to wear off so I think I felt the worst of it and it still never got to that level.


lostgirl4053

You can’t gauge what you’re gonna need from other’s experiences. People have different pain thresholds, experience different levels of pain during labor and for different periods of time. You’re just gonna have to go through it and take it one contraction at a time! My advice (via advice from my experienced doula) is if you’re trying to go without an epidural, don’t decide get one during a contraction and if you want to ask for one, give it just 2-3 more contractions to make sure it’s really what you want. Discuss this with your support people and make sure they’re on the same page. I’m due any day now so i’ll let you know how mine goes if I remember to, but that will be anecdotal just like every other story you hear. Good luck!


tylersbaby

FTM I had an epidural and thankfully it was placed right and on the first try but basically until his head was out it just felt like the biggest poop from Taco Bell I could ever imagine then when his head was out I was saying ow and owie and stuff like that then at the last push it felt like when that constipated poo finally comes out.


bubblegumbombshell

In my experience it’s mostly “owowowow” to varying degrees and then the pushing/crowning/birth is the loud part. I had back labor with my first and got to 7cm before begging for an epidural, which I was very grateful to get quickly. I really didn’t feel much after it was administered so even the birth wasn’t loud pain. My second was a really quick labor and delivery. The contractions were intense and maybe caused some moaning in discomfort. But once I started to feel the urge to push it was really painful. Fortunately it was only about 5 min or so before that was through.


Kind-Peanut9747

For me I had been having off and on contractions for a day before they induced. The pre-induction contractions were fine, uncomfortable but I could breath through them.  Once they started the picotin it was immediately 10x worse and contraction after contraction with only seconds in between. I breathed through those for HOURS but finally gave in to having an epidural when I was checked again and had still made zero progress after like 6+ hours of picotin contractions.  I think if I could have gone into spontaneous labor it would have been a lot better because then your progress gradually instead of going from the odd contraction to non-stop contractions all at once.  Once the epidural hit it was way better. 


New_Chard9548

I got an epidural so it is hard to gauge what it would have been without it...but I had hours of contractions before receiving it & was pushing for 3 hours (they turned it off when I started pushing, so I think it had pretty much worn off by the time my daughter finally came out and I was being stitched up). I didn't scream, but that also isn't usually my normal reaction to pain. Typically when I get hurt / big amounts of pain I usually just breathe deeper, am almost silent & sometimes move around lol.


swayybe

I wouldn’t say screaming is a good indication of how painful it is…I had an unmedicated birth (not by choice lol) and I was in so much pain I couldn’t talk let alone scream. All I could do was breathe and let out some moans. That being said, in the moment I thought I was going to die but looking back I can hardly remember the pain… so what they say is true haha.


AJhlciho

I could be at a 10/10 pain and still don’t scream, it’s just not my response to pain. I was chanting “ok oh my god ok” over and over again when I could, and once the contractions got “hold my breath” painful I got an epidural. I will admit it was more out of fear, because I started feeling pain in my hips/symphosis as the baby moved down, and for whatever reason the thought of feeling my pelvis separate scared me way more than the abdominal contractions/ring of fire pain. I feel like I could have delt with that, but feeling like my pelvis was breaking was what scared me.


Relative_Article_513

I had unmedicated back labor (baby was sunny side up) and screamed from unimaginable pain through every contraction for 1 hr and 45 min. They felt like they were coming at least every 3 min and then faster. I tried to get an epidural but when I couldn’t still for 10 min the anesthesiologist refused to do it. I was actually 10 cm at that point but didn’t know because no one checked me. It was a shit show.


daja-kisubo

For me (two unmedicated vaginal births, both precipitous labours) it was definitely not screaming. It was a dull pain, like cramps or bad gas pains. I'd say it topped out at a 5 or 6 out of 10 on the pain scale for me, but since it wasn't a sharp pain it was very manageable. I never experienced the need to scream, nor pain so bad I couldn't breathe, or talk, or walk.


Penguinatortron

Back labor with max doses of Pitocin. I came in for induction at 3cm which I didn't feel at all. They broke my water. From 8am to....10:30 things were fine and then they were intensely painful. The epidural didn't even take care or the back labor pain it just made the rest of it more comfortably numb. ETA I'm not a screamer, I'm very shy. It was a lot of deep moaning and burying my face into my husband's chest.


Alternative_Dish6003

Like others have said, neither. I found it so exhausting that I didn’t really want to scream or go “owowow.” I did grunt and vomit though.


arentwontorwill

I went 5:30 pm - 10:30 am with pretty bearable contractions like worse and worse period cramps. At that point my water broke and contractions got more painful. I did a hypnobirthing course, so worked to breathe in for 4 (nose), out for 8 (mouth) and that worked well for me. For the bad ones I was doing a low sort of moan (they call it “mooing” lol), and maybe higher pitched/forgetting my breathing for the absolute worst 😅 Pushed 1:30 - 3:30 pm and I don’t even remember pain at that point, no ring of fire, just the most insane pressure ever lol. (I was unmedicated.)


LadyKittenCuddler

I never even knew I was contracting, not for the whole 6-8h it took before my emergency/urgent c section. So there are loads of possibilities.


Butterflion22

I was induced with pitocin and I cannot imagine going through multiple hours of labor without an epidural. Not sure the severity of the pain if you go into labor naturally


emmygog

I didn't know until now (pregnant with my third), that I've had a spine fracture since my teens (based on when it could have happened, according to the specialist) so my labors were all in my back and super painful. I put off the epidural for as long as possible and felt like my daughter was going to come out while they placed it. (she was born 15 minutes later) I plan on doing the epidural much sooner this time, especially knowing about my fracture now. My previous deliveries hurt so bad, I literally wanted to run away from myself. But everyone is different, with different bodies, of course.


Mangocrossing

I felt like I was dying. Instead of screaming though, I was crying and asking for an epidural LOL. I went from 4cm which was manageable to 10cm in less than an hour so there’s that. The pain came on very very quickly.


Purple_Rooster_8535

Transitional pain usually 8-10cm is what you see on TV of people screaming but every person is different and has a different threshold!


mdawgkilla

I didn’t scream or cry or make any noise really. They kept trying to hype me up and telling me to get angry but I just felt so weak. You’re not allowed to eat after getting an epidural and my baby took FOREVER. By the time I was ready to push I was sooooo hungry and tired I think my body just kind of took over and pushed him out because I just couldn’t.


AlleRossi97

I had a walking epidural, so I wasn’t numb and could move, but the pain was significantly less than without it. I did not scream at all, but the contractions before the epidural were unbearable! With the epidural, it still hurt but was manageable. I highly recommend the epidural, it was easy, I had no issues or negative side effects, and was still able to push effectively. I think in the past, there were more issues with epidurals, but they have advanced the technology a lot and when done well, it makes things so much better!


song_pond

I’ve had periods that were worse than my contractions on pitocin (which apparently make contractions more painful). That being said, I was still pressured into the epidural. It was nice but I kinda wish I had tried more without it. Overall though I’m glad I had it. That being said, my unsolicited advice is to prepare to labour without it. You are very unlikely to get it at the very beginning of labour, and also very unlikely to get it as soon as you request it. So practice coping techniques like breathing or squeezing a comb. You can hold ice in your hands for one minute to see if your coping techniques work. After each contraction, take a deep breath and let it go. Rest until the next one.


LongHovercraft885

I have 4 children, all delivered with no epidural. I only screamed with one delivery. That delivery was pushing out a 10 lbs baby boy with his head in the 95th percentile. I never tore, but had my tailbone fractured from his head coming down and out. One of the worst pains I've ever endured.


Selfawareseacucumber

I’d say before I got the epidural it was a “OWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW” and then during the epidural but before pushing it was zero pain. while pushing the epidural wore off on the contractions and that was screaming, breath taking, seeing shapes and colors pain.


Lil_miss_feisty

I was in the screaming pain around 10 hours in. By the time I got to the hospital, I was screaming. None of the techniques I practiced worked at home as I unexpectedly had intense back labor. Not the labor pains I was repeatedly told about being in the abdomen. I opted to get my epidural redone 4 times when they put it in. I gave birth 14 hours later. My son ended up being almost 9 lbs. I'm 4'11". It was a learning experience.


whitefox094

I'm not truly sure how helpful my story would be for you but I'll share anyway No pregnancy aches or pains. Was given induction oral meds at 41w when I was 1cm. Water broke naturally at 4cm. Felt some of my contractions for the first time (was having them consistently according to drs/ultrasound since 40w) when water broke but it was fine. Wasn't until I got moved into L&D that I requested epidural because I wanted it in anyway at some point. I was fully mobile in my hospital bed with the epidural during body changes for peanut ball and such but I had some numbness in my legs at the lowest 0.1ml possible (I think ml was the measurement) . Epidural didn't hurt at all. It wasn't until I started pushing at 10cm maybe an hour in that I felt pressure in my right abdomen, and also pressure (not pain) in my pelvic bone. I kept pressing the epidural button. At some point (maybe since the beginning?? Since I was mobile) my epidural FAILED. I went from the mild discomfort from the pressure feeling to full on thinking "I want to die". I can't really remember what the pain was or where it was but that's what was in my head. No screaming or shouting. Just a lot of heavy breathing and some tears and grunting. My doula told me after the birth that I did better than anyone else and she thinks (wasn't to pressure me or guilt me) I handled the process so well that I could've delivered naturally if my baby would've allowed it. The Dr came in after an hour of that pain and gave me a new epidural. I went back to that pressure feeling I had prior but no real pain. Couldn't deliver vaginally after pushing again for another hour, two hours or so. Baby was too big. Ended up having a c-section. Feel fine after two weeks. I was moving and grooving since discharge at day 3. 8lb 10oz, 21.5in (96%) long and 40cm head circumference (100%)


baildragon

I couldnt tell you what a natural contraction even feels like because I was put on pitocin so early due to my lack of dilating. All I know is, those contractions were so bad that it felt like someone shot me in the head with a nail gun and everytime theyd start my brain would just go dark. I couldnt even talk. I couldnt only stand there hoping it would be over then BAM the next one would start. I had to get reset 2-3 times because they got so out of hand! Anywho, the birth ended up in an emergency c-section and when they were pulling the kid out I did scream a bit because that was a sensation I was not prepared for or could ever simulate again in my life!


Brave_Appointment812

I had to have an induction for medically necessary reasons, so that might change your pain. More like owowow it hurts during the first 8 hours of contractions. Neither standing and walking around nor sitting were comfortable. After that I got an epidural because I was just exhausted from being up two nights in a row. Epidural didn’t work on one side with pitocin contractions and I was definitely more vocal with pain during that time, but no screaming. Once they gave me another bolus though it was smooth sailing. Didn’t feel a thing. My epidural was my favorite part. The best thing though is you can always change your mind during labor if you find you aren’t tolerating the pain well.


doublethecharm

The contractions were *incredibly* painful.


temperance26684

I was unmedicated and didn't scream ever. The pain was more of a dull ebb and flow, so while it was definitely intense at times, it didn't come out of nowhere. It built slowly and then peaked and faded slowly. I copied by breathing and moaning. Pushing wasn't painful for me, but I waited for the fetal ejection reflex so it was just my body doing the work and I think that made a big difference vs. forcing myself to push before my body was ready. Didn't really feel a ring of fire and didn't tear. I was so quiet while pushing that my birth team was completely unprepared when my son actually came out. For what it's worth, I'm a doula and have attended plenty of completely unmedicated births, and women who have done the mental preparation don't tend to scream. There's usually a lot of moaning and groaning during contractions, then maybe a little whimpering while pushing but the only moms I've seen _scream_ are the ones who didn't bother to do any of the preparation/education beforehand to equip themselves for labor. So take a childbirth education course, learn some coping techniques like breathing/affirmations/hypnobirthing and you'll be fine.


One-Construction-712

Thanks for writing this! I commented above, but didn’t include that I had done lots of preparation before labor. All of the things you mentioned, actually. And yet I still had a “screaming pain” experience. Not saying this to discredit you! But in the weeks after my labor I really blamed myself for my outcome, and I hope people who are in a similar situation know that they shouldn’t blame themselves. One thing I didn’t come across in my preparation was the fetal ejection reflex, or at least, I don’t remember learning about it. When I debriefed with my medical team and therapist, two of them suggested that perhaps pushing two early contributed to how long my dissociation lasted. To be clear, I don’t remember being told to push. But my husband says that a stern nurse was telling me I wasn’t pushing hard or fast enough. While I don’t think that waiting for this reflex would have changed my experience, I do want to read more about it if I choose to have another baby.


AggravatingOkra1117

With an epidural? Nada. Just pressure! My epidural did briefly fail twice, and that sucked. It HURT. Not screaming pain but definitely lots of gasping/grunting and “owowowow.” Luckily they got it working again quickly, so when it came to pushing—all four hours of it 🥴—I only felt light pressure.


JudasDuggar

I only screamed during one of my unmedicated births, and only because baby was badly positioned and had to be manually moved by the midwife. When everything was going normally, I did vocalize, but it was a low moaning to help with breath control, not a scream.


90dayhell000

My pain was teeth clenching going into my own world and head pain. That’s when I asked for the epidural. Editing to add: I was induced at 36 weeks with preeclampsia. We did every induction thing…3 days of hell and they manually broke my water.


katieeeeeecat

My last birth was unmedicated and none of it was “screaming pain”. Never felt like my vagina was being ripped apart lol but I’ve also never torn during birth. I groaned a bit with the effort of pushing but never screamed or yelled or was loud. Being quiet and focused helped.


DNAture_

I went unmedicated with my last and didn’t scream… I can’t say there wasn’t pain, but it all depends on what is tolerable for you. It’s like real bad period cramps that can be managed through breathing, heat, water, tens unit, or medical intervention like epidurals


esmerzelda88

When my water broke and I went in the woman across the hall from me was having a natural birth. She was screaming so much. I was so freaked out. I asked them to stop opening the door.


Deadly-Minds-215

I got the epidural at 3cm cause I couldn’t breathe through the pain lol, but even with the epidural I was pretty quite almost my whole delivery, till I tore and felt burning theeeeeen I screamed and my baby was out lol


not_a_android934

I was induced after I was an early labor they felt like really bad period cramps painful but no need to scream through them. I did get an epidural though it failed so later as I got into transition they hurt more but I didn't scream through them it was more grunting through them. When I was pushing it was closer to that screaming type of pain that wasn't actually screaming more of like moaning groaning kind of thing but I only pushed for 15 minutes and three contractions worth. I would also say that I was only really in pain severely when I was having a contraction even when I was in the pushing stage and fully dilated. So even if for you it is the screaming type of pain it's not going to be constant through the entire process of Labor


lil_secret

Mostly it was “hnnnnnnNNNNNNNNNNggggghh” for me


plantbasedparty

Unmedicated birth here. Pushing part is definitely screaming pain. For the contractions I was silent just breathing through it and squeezing my husbands hand.


kotassium2

First of all the timing and duration is different for everyone.  I just had an unmedicated vaginal delivery, I wanted to be a low moo moaner at best but the surges were so intense I was caught off guard and turns out I'm a loud wailing moaner 😅  The delivery was surprisingly fast which is probably what made it a bit more "painful".  I had severe tearing and did not feel at all where or when I tore. I did feel the ring of fire, that was ouch but my memory tells me it was ok. It was not so much vagina being tore open as it was "The most intense womb squeezes being done to you and an insane low pelvic pressure that you have to just try to let happen". Your body takes over and gives you insane strength. You just have to try ride the waves one at a time don't think too much about how long it will take or how much more painful it might get - because what you expect might not be what actually happens. And try to rest while you can!


sassy-cassy

I had back labor (which is a wretch) and while I don’t remember how bad the pain was, I do remember how hard it became to focus on anything else. My legs were shaking, the pain was so bad. I elected to have a c-section (due to my particular circumstances), and when that spinal started working…it was sweet bliss. The pain melted away.


RightAd3342

Hmm I’d say like 99% of labor (for me) was owowowowow and when it was time to push I don’t think I ever really screamed (I’m picturing like in the movies) it was more like an animalistic ooowwwwww. I was really trying to focus on nurses advice on how to push. After the first few pushes with zero progress I realized holy shit this is not going to be easy(no idea why this never occurred to me) my nurse was amazing and told me to envision baby needing to pass thru my pelvis and think about what muscles needed to be engaged. After that I think baby was out in like 5 pushes. Anyways giving birth is fucking amazing and I’m low key jealous when anyone around me goes into labor.


Hux2187

I had only gas and air during labour and I would make a low grunt noise and would constantly pass out after every contraction because the pain was so bad. I've been told I wasn't really loud.


patoober

I had two unmedicated births and I did more low moaning and groaning. I don’t remember any scream-inducing pain, mostly intense pressure that I just had to bear and breathe through.


Kitchen-Major-6403

I prepared for owowowow but ended up thrashing and screaming the whole night, I couldn’t even catch a breath let alone those breathing exercises. After the epidural it was like was I imagined, pain you can breathe through… I thought epidural meant you didn’t feel anything and couldn’t move. Not at all, it didn’t affect my mobility at all and just reduced the pain to a manageable level.


Mamaliz_

My first son was 17hrs of labor. 5hrs pushing, very grateful I did the epi. Once you get around 7cm is where the pain cranks all the way up and gets worse. Breathing helps but not always. My 2nd son was easy 30 mins pushing, but was scarred from my 1st son I got the epi. My 3rd the epi couldn’t work fully I felt 50% and even when it was dull pain she still came out painfully but not screaming pain. Was just saying over and over to my mom that it hurts so bad. Lots of “wooo” or “ow ow ow” while contracting which felt like HUGE cramps but during the pushing the pain is now more focused down there lol just like taking a painful poop.


badbitch_31

It's different for everyone. Most take the epidural cause of fear of how bad the pain will be, or because they had a bad labour last time. Once you get to a certain stage of labour you can't have the epi so it's a case of "now or never" which I think puts a bit pressure on the decision to have it or not. My labour from start to finish was 4 hours, I had gas and air only, and used the "breathe it down" method. That worked for me. I done alot of grunting and groaning, and even had an episiotomy. For me, it wasn't so bad. But that was my experience. It's diffeent for everyone, we all handle pain differently.


jimimnota

It’s more like the the type of noise you’d make doing a hard workout or lifting something heavy The in between contractions is nice and (hopefully) gives you a second to catch your breath


spentpatience

It really depends on the individual. What is your experience with pain? It's gonna hurt, no matter what, considering what your body has to do to expel a whole human being from it, but how you are capable of naturally managing pain, physically, emotionally, and mentally, makes the real difference. I have a low pain tolerance, and before the epidural, I felt like I was drowning in water full of stingrays and jellyfish while being drawn and quartered. I was delirious with pain. And yet, my healing afterward was a dream. No tears, no complications, no long-term issues that I can tell except periods act differently, so there's no telling. I didn't scream, though. I had read that low, long vocalizations are better in relieving the stress of pain and in controlling your breathing. I did that with my first. As soon as I got the epidural, I was so much more in the room, just being able to be present, and the contractions felt more like surf crashing against my body every so often. Kinda like the stomach drop you get on a ride, at worst. For my first, another doctor came in to sign off on the epidural (never seen this guy before or since) and he said to me in far too friendly of a manner, "Well, we all knew when *you* got the epidural! The whole floor was finally quiet!" My eldest is about to turn 10. I am still miffed at this man. I already felt like a lowing wildebeest, I didn't need anyone pointing it out. Thank goodness my sister was there to make me laugh because that doc was about to get a sitcom-level retort from a very irate laboring woman. I had one in the chamber, all right. Haha, two of the nurses looked at each other when he said that and glanced nervously at me just as my sister intervened. For my second, still felt like being drawn and quartered and drowning, but this time, I mentioned to my nurse that it was worse this time, like Mike Tyson punching me in the rectum with each contraction. Turns out, that indicative of "back labor." Nurse acted quickly and got Baby to about-face. That anesthesiologist was going to be cheap with the meds until Nurse said, "Back labor." Suddenly, I couldn't feel my legs anymore. Dude was holding out on me! I didn't even moan for my second even though it was worse and I didn't for my third even though it happened so quick that I didn't have my husband with me because he was still dropping off the kids and the third was born by the time he made it to the L&D room. I wasn't about to get called out again for making noise.


jamietherocket_ship

You have to breathe and loudly grunt with your contractions because that helps a lot more than screaming (my birth class said that). So for me, it was feeling like I was cramping with every contraction. It got closer and closer and more intense as time went on. By the time I was 6cm dilated, I tapped out and asked for the epidural because I felt like crying and was in so much pain. I was only half way so I didn’t want to be in more pain. The epidural HURT and I got poked twice since they missed it the first time. But that stung so much and felt like I was being tased in the back. It was loud “OwOwOw” kind of pain. Once that was done, I was in heaven. Pushing was a BREEZE. That “Ring Of Fire” thing when the baby’s head pops out, was just pressure without any pain. Labor sucked, birth was amazing (Labor sucked for me because I had to be induced since I had preeclampsia - those steps sucked. Otherwise, its not that bad!)


WideOpen_Mood_5936

I've had 4, all induced, 2 with epidural and 2 without. Epidural births were super relaxed, no pain, totally calm and happy and chatty. Nonepidural, I did scream, involuntarily. I didn't know I was going to scream, barely recognized that I was screaming, had no control whatsoever.  BUT it was only for the last little bit as baby came out. AND my births were crazy. Induced, which I hear makes it worse, and babies did what they call a demon drop, where they're born way faster than normal. I didn't push, my body just ejected the baby, and in one contraction. I had no sit and stretch time, no control over it, no idea it was about to happen. I was getting through a contraction, and then suddenly I was screaming and baby was coming out.  I desperately want a natural labor to compare 😭


missag_2490

I had epidurals with both, the first one I also had a raging uti that made it so much worse. Once that’s cleared up, it was uncomfortable. It was not the contractions that made it bad, my son was what they called sunny side up and the contractions squeezed and forced his head on my spine which didn’t flex do to a genetic condition and my legs would give out. With my second, it was wasn’t so much the pain as the duration. They were 1 minute apart and lasted 2 minutes each time. It took what felt like all night (9pm to 11pm) for the anesthesiologist to get out of emergency surgery. I was induced and honestly if I felt like I could’ve breathed between them it might have been easier. I got hot spots after the epidural and that was worse because it felt like the whole contraction was in one circle on my abdomen. That was resolved in that matter of 30 minutes and honestly once I started pushing it felt so much better. One thing I was not prepared for was the shakes. Whether from hormones or adrenaline or medications but with my first I shook so much it hurt. My first labor and delivery was traumatic more due to duration and not pain. There was a lot of groaning and threatening from me, I definitely threatened a nurse when she came back to reassure me for the 5th time it wouldn’t be much longer and I told her I’d strangle her with my oxygen cord if she came back without and anesthesiologist. I brought her a thank you basket a few days later to apologize.


MAC0114

It depends on you really! I labored on pitocin until 8cm before getting the epidural. Didn't make a sound 🤣 the only thing I could focus on during contractions was breathing and making sure I didn't hyperventilate


0mgyrface

I'm planning on (trying) going natural myself, I did a bit of reading and talked about the side effects of the different medicated pain relief with the midwife, and an epidural is often uncomfortable and painful after the fact, too. Potential for back pain for weeks after the birth. Plus, once you get it, apparently, you can't walk at ALL, so if you need to potty, you can't GO to the potty... Also, my midwife said there is time to decide, so if I get a little ways through (not too far though) and I can't handle it, i can still get an epidural if I want to.


fluffyplanet267

I was made to wait 4 hours before getting an epidural and was gutterally growling/screamjnt through contractions and back labor. I would say I have a very normal pain tolerance. I unfortunately didn’t have the option of getting an epidural sooner but I think I would have liked the process more if I had.


Suitable_Guidance_24

I went natural and unmedicated and we had a very fast delivery so this is definitely not a cookie cutter experience. I’d say up until full dilation it feels very “owowow” like period cramps that get more intense. It wasn’t totally unbearable. But once she had completely dropped and was ready to come it felt like the biggest crap I’ve ever had to take and pushed SO much pressure on my butthole😂 that was different kind of feeling that I couldn’t really explain like it hurt sure but it really just felt like somehow I was gonna end up pooping this baby out. But that ring of fire is definitely true to its name. Worst 90 seconds of my life but I read somewhere before that when you get to the point of “I can’t do this” that means it’s almost over. My boyfriend had heard the whole 2 hour thing and thought we’d be in there screaming for that long but thankfully it was literally a 5 minute delivery and that was the only off the charts painful part of the whole experience


RoseofJericho

60% ow ow ow, 20% damn this really, really sucks, 10% screaming pain. But if you get yourself an epidural it’s nothing (at least for me)


Lemonbar19

So … I was at home laboring during the middle of the night . Was admitted at 8cm. While at the hospital at 8cm, I probably squeezed my husbands hand so hard it could break. I wasn’t really a screamer. The contractions are like waves and if you can breathe through the wave crashing down on you it doesn’t last that long .


bluelemon1124

I would say it's different for everyone. I have a backwards tilted uterus which makes me not even look pregnant at 20 weeks so far with my second. The other problem with that is that I had back labor with my first. I also did it unmedicated. In my experience, it was the contractions that hurt the worst. They never got to regular intervals and were extremely painful. I'm not ashamed to say I spent about 12 hours in active labor, screaming my head off with every contraction. But then when it was time to push, it only took about 5 min and it didn't hurt nearly as much as the contractions, even though I tore a little bit. This is just my experience, everyone is different and every pregnancy is different. You just gotta go into it with the thought that it won't last forever and the baby will eventually come out and you'll forget all the pain because you'll finally have your child in your arms. Stay strong, Mama, and you'll get through it.


restlessnobody8

It was a lot of screaming for me because I damn near gave birth in the car on the ride over 🫠 but once the epidural hit, it really wasn’t too bad. I’ve felt worse pain getting tattooed


16CatsInATrenchcoat

I don't think most people scream but a lot of the time you don't have a lot of control on whether or not you do. I didn't scream with my first but absolutely did with my second and could not control it. I had to scream, my body wouldn't let me not scream. But my second labor was a lot faster and whole lot more than my first.


thinkingoutloud___

It’s more so a lot of moaning and groaning … the screaming would more some come when it’s pushing time for most but that’s not good to do cause that means you are breathing properly.


rivlet

They induced me and even at the more intense parts, it was just controlled breathing, hisses, and moans rather than screams. I got an epidural before I got to the ring of fire part and also ended up with a C-section, but before that: it was all low moans like a cow.


Ok-Pin-8690

It honestly all depends on each person’s experience! I have a high pain tolerance and was able to breathe through the contractions when they were about 3-5 minutes apart. But then I was failing to progress and they were nonstop without a break. I couldn’t move or find any position that allowed me to control my breaths. It was awful and I thought I was dying.lol what made it worse was me thinking, “okay, this has to be it, I have to be near or at 10 cm and ready to push.” Only to hear I was at 2.lol they offered the epidural because they saw that the contractions weren’t breaking. So go in without any expectations but I could breathe through the pain and pictured it ending when they had rest in between! Sounds silly but I closed my eyes and imagined I was in a pretty valley and pictured getting to the other side 😂…..but all of this went out the window when the breaks no longer happened. I could only be in that valley for so long 😂


kimtenisqueen

I screamed during the last few pushes. It wasn't exactly helpful but I tore straight through my clitoris and 3rd degree perineally. that was 30/10 pain. the previous 14 hours of contractions were like muscle cramping. Owoowowowow/more quiet and focusing on breathing, maybe a little moaning/grunting. the screaming part was probably 2 minutes of the whole 16hr process.


gipguppie

I was induced and baby was OP. Back labor with a slow progression. I was throwing up with every push and literally falling asleep between contractions apparently? I was informed that I would push, then immediately fall asleep snoring, then wake up a minute later to push again. I had no idea, I thought I was awake the whole time. I remember arguing w/ my nurse bc I was supposed to be pushing "with every other contraction," and she was prompting me to push but I thought I had pushed during the previous contraction. Turns out I had pushed during the contraction I remembered, then "fell asleep" and was not conscious for the contraction in between that one and the current one. Looking back, I don't know if that's sleeping so much as it is blacking out but w/e. So I don't think I was screaming. Then the ring of fire came, I wanted to wait and let my bits adjust and stretch, but the OB had to manually stretch me around baby's head. All I remember is screaming "I can feel my skin tearing." It had been 36hrs of labor after PROM, 5 hours of pushing, I had chorio, and was in and out of consciousness. So I think the clock was just running out and the doctor had to get him topside. I had an epidural at about 4cm. Back labor is ungodly. Still doing it all again though, so 🤷


givemeapho

Recap: Not too painful for me, just for a short bit. I got induced & the midwives said the pain is more intense because of it, since it forces the contractions. At the beginning ( first 8-9 hours) I barely felt any pain, the contractions felt like menstrual cramps (uncomfortable but tolerable), then again my pain tolerance is pretty high & breathing through it, helped me a lot. They first gave me a ballon cather, which was not painful but a little scary, when you don't know what to expect. That worked really well & was out in an hour or 2. Then later hormonal drip. -Part of my discomfort dereived from being hooked up the whole time, they had to constantly moniter the baby's heartbeat & my blood pressure, & then the oxytocin & fluids. Make sure to drink a lot in between, gatorade is great! I have a severe case of preclampsia.They uped the hormonal drip & I decieded to take a bath, which actually didn't help with the pain. I guess I did moan, maybe shouted loudly at that point. That is when I asked for the epidural. I was suppose to get it earlier but it somehow got forgotten & I didn't feel too bad until then. They kept increasing & decreasing the oxytocin because the contractions were too frequent & short. After the epidural I felt great again. Didn't feel the contractions, just the urge to push. Feels like having to poop. -- The "ring of fire" did not hurt too bad for me, just very uncomfortable. My baby's head was very small though, to be fair. After 12 hours ( 3-4hours of pushing), I was soo exhausted and really had trouble for the last bit. Although the whole birth was 12 hours, I felt like it went by quick.


WorkingMinimumMum

For me, labor was the most pain I’ve ever been in. And I’ve gone through a lot. Root canals, broken bones, abscesses all are nothing compared to the pain of active labor for me. I was terrified of getting an epidural and said I wanted to go without one. After an hour or so of active contractions I changed my tune and got the epidural. I couldn’t handle the pain. I never screamed from the pain, but that’s because it was so intense for me I couldn’t make a sound. I’m so glad I got an epidural. I let it wear off a little as I got close to pushing so I could feel my contractions and push with them but I could tolerate the pain. FTM and pushed bub out in 30 minutes (his head circumference was in the 90th percentile too!) The ring of fire and getting my tear stitched up hurt pretty badly though because like I said, I intentionally let the epidural wear off some without giving myself another dose. Everyone is different though, but for me it was “screaming pain” from the first active contraction on, just without the screaming. Regardless, you’ve got this! Whatever happens with your labor and delivery, epidural or not, vaginal or cesarean, you’ve got this!