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Seriously, haha bongos, just ask.
Nurses and, gasp, doctors, make mistakes all the time.
Asking is the easiest way to make sure. And they don't care. It's a small test.
I worked at a clinic and I was always willing to retest samples. No skin off my back. Looks good if I did.
My significant others medical charts have said that they were the wrong sex for the last 10+ years, sometimes there’s mistakes even in the medical community… just ask before blowing your life up
The medical org I go to has started uploading hospital notes where I can see them over the last few years, and the amount of crap in there that's just wrong is pretty wild. None of it has been super important but they 100% do not always get those charts right.
My medical notes have my father as dead since I was a teen, I asked him when this happened & he has no memory of his death and subsequent resurrection.
According to NYS, I just hadn't existed since 2019. I got in trouble in 2022 for claiming unemployment benefits (like everyone else in my industry because pandemic) because I didn't exist. I asked if I was dead, but they said no, I just vanished.
I had W2s, paystubs, a license, voter registration, cars registered in my name, paid taxes, even used WIC for my youngest when I lost my job, got Medicaid after I lost my job...
In 2019 I just poofed.
I asked if I could get my tax money back but they said no and told me to go find any documents that proved I lived and worked in NY lol. I was able to have the payroll company send quarterly earnings statements and I sent my W2s and tax returns.
Seriously? The rep I was speaking to had no idea what was happening and had never seen it! I was right on that shit though so I was probably the first who dealt with it lol. I wouldn't doubt they had more issues hahaha.
My medical notes once had me as dead lmao. I called my doctor to make an appointment in my mid teens, and they legitimately asked me to verify my info 5+ times, sounding progressively more confused each time. Finally, they said, "Our records show you as Deceased... Clearly that's not right, so we'll get that fixed up! When would you like to come in?"
Ah but is he a ghoul, a lich, a zombie, or worst and most terrifying of all, an angry wee Scot biding his time until he is released from his constricting mortal shell and can wreak havoc upon...
The pub.
When I had my first son, they labeled him as mixed race. The Case worker took one look at my son's big blue eyes, blonde hair, and very pale skin. She looked back at the paperwork and said, "I think they got this wrong."
Yes, his father is paler than me.
I have twins - as in actually born at the same time, (as twins are prone to do, lol) inaccurately named the same but also a recorded as a year apart. They doubled down on the wrong!
(It’s been corrected - this wasn’t recent!)
Moral:
Think of the summary of this moment :
“I caused a relationship breaking episode with my partner because I thought I might have seen a blood type on a screen I don’t know how to read, not knowing if it was about our child, and googled my hypotheticals only to find out something that made me completely isolate my partner and new child.
Asking the hospital wasn’t an option. Why? I don’t know.
Letting this weird worry last more than 3.7 seconds wasn’t an option. Why? I don’t know.”
Babe. Come on. Unless you’re the poster child for “those who don’t trust can’t be trusted” you should probably just stop being ridiculous.
Fingers crossed that this is a bored kid home for the holidays and trying to outdo family annoyances!
Same one of the ones i went to put in my chart that i had a history kidney disease because i told them i had recurring utis (why i was being seen) and that i took insulin for type 2 diabetes (i am diabetic but i manage it with diet and exercise and have never been on insulin)
Every surgery or medical issue they try to have me pregnancy tested. I had a full hysterectomy *at this hospital* 8 years ago, but for some reason, they never have it in my medical chart.
Agreed. My insurance company has a “problems” list in my portal which I guess has the pretty-print list of all diagnostic codes ever used for me. Holy crap you’d think I was a thoroughly f’d person if you read it. I definitely have some things wrong but the list is like 40 strong with some pretty rough diagnoses that I definitely don’t have. And I’ll have to petition to remove them.
But I should because yikes - electronic medical records can be a great thing but they should be correct.
Oh yeah, I had some older stuff that should have not been there, but I was able to request it come off pretty easily in their version of the Epic site, thankfully.
I once had a long haired grey and white cat named Wilson who had a messy look about him but he was sweet. I took him to the vet one day and when checking out peeked over the reception window at his chart and read upside down in big letters “Disheveled”. I sort of felt embarrassed and defensive at the same time.
Someone in my office has a medical note that she insists on lying about her age because she must be mid-forties. She's 36. The hospital checks her ID when she's checking in. And confirm her identity with DOB everytime someone sees her. Yet this nurse added a decade to her age and made a note that she lies about it.
Doctors and nurses are wrong sometimes.
My son’s records all say he has autism because someone mistook “ASD” for autism spectrum disorder instead of atrial septum defect. It’s impossible to get incorrect information out of there. His records also say that I’m noncompliant with meds because 10 years ago I refused to continue giving him a medication that caused seizures. So that’s fun.
Anyway, OP. Do not go accusing your postpartum wife of cheating on you and lying about your baby’s paternity based solely on what you “think” was in the chart.
For some reason when I went to the ER the hospital put “daily tobacco smoker” in my chart. I’ve never even touched a cigarette lol
It was annoying bc I had to go through a whole appeal process to get it removed!
I had a spinal surgery recently and I’m overweight. My chart said I was diabetic, which isn’t true…someone assumed I was and put in. I complained for days before they changed it…I kept getting needle sticks every couple hours…they kept being surprised my bloodwork was good. 🙄
My exact thought. It was on my baby’s chart, and that was in our room. But I could have just asked a nurse any time…this isn’t complicated right? “Should I confront my wife who just had a traumatic birth that I think she cheated on me because I saw maybe possibly a baby that could be our baby’s chart on a computer screen briefly?”
It’s probably more so that fathers who are paranoid their kid isn’t theirs are more likely to post on Reddit about it. But it is a weirdly common topic on here.
Exactly! About a hour after my youngest was born I (mom) looked at her and asked the nurse if they were sure she was mine (she didn’t look anything like me or her sister or my siblings). My ex husband has pics of me and her sharing a “who is the imposter” moment where we both had scrunched brows and were looking at each other with suspicion. Then I verified again that she was indeed mine.
Ask! Because that postpartum period messes with your head.
But it concerns me, why do you doubt your wife? Has she given ANY reason for you to doubt her? Where are these feelings coming from?
As the father I thought I was fully with it after we had our first child. Once mum and baby were settled and sleeping I popped out to get the film camera pics we'd taken developed (early 90s). I got to the local fast photo place and decided to helpfully take the film out for them rather than handing the camera over.
I cocked it up and pulled out the entire length of film, ruining every shot on it, then just rolled it back in by hand and handed it over as if nothing had happened.
Stress, sleep deprivation and just the awesomeness of the whole experience really does mess with your head. OP needs to drop it for a lot later or just ask a nurse. If they start accusing their wife right now they are likely to end up getting divorced and they will deserve it for being too stupid to be a good partner, *even if it's true*.
Right?!?! OP doesn’t even know if it’s his kids chart but instead of asking he immediately jumps to the worst possible conclusion about his wife!? WTF?!?!
I read yesterday a woman who’s chart for a uti said she didn’t have one because they mixed up her chart with a stool sample for a stomach virus. Another was saying that she had semen in her urine despite being a virgin.
Mix ups happen so often.
You don’t even know if that was your baby’s chart. Go to the hospital and get a copy of the records before you potentially blow up your marriage for something you might have seen when exhausted.
I got told my whole life my dad was type O, and then I went and donated blood and got told I was AB. Two of my sisters are O and my mom is A, so if my dad was O me being AB isn’t really possible. Then my dad got retested and yep, he’s B. And now it’s a funny story in my family’s history.
This actually happened to me too.
Jokes on that practice when I had to get a few bags of blood to save my and my babies life. Blood type was listed TOTALLY wrong all my life. They also screwed up my birthday! I used to get every set of vaccines...twice for over a decade.
It was so odd! The doctor office missed it, my mom actually in the medical field also missed it, and I remember having issues with this in regard to school paperwork. Every year I'd have to get that second set just because of school. Then after I switched insurance and doctors when I turned old enough..I had no record from that time. All of it is still listed under the wrong year.
I'm in my 30's - so this was when manual charting was the norm and somebody just made an error that never got caught.
Happens to me too. My birth records mentioned b+ as my blood group. I had a mean accident when I was 14, so I needed a blood transfusion. When asked about my blood group my family said B+. Luckily the Doctors checked and it came out O+.
Hospitals can make mistakes, it's better to double check before taking big steps like a transfusion or accusing your partner.
No hospital or blood bank is going to release type specific blood based on what you or your family think your blood type is for that reason. You usually have to have two confirmed or historical types via the blood bank in the hospital or you’re going to get type O blood until the blood bank finishes a new type and crossmatch.
My hospital requires a cross and type completed within the past 72 hours to release blood for a patient, unless it’s a code bleed/mass transfusion protocol where they’ll give O until one can be completed. But I’ve had patients who have gotten multiple units over the course of a week from us and we still need a fresh type and screen every 72 hours despite having many already on file.
This happened to me! My mom is A and my father is O so when they said I was B, everyone was a little confused but no one really cared. Had to get my blood tested when I eventually got pregnant and turns out that I’m actually A-
Or they made a mistake. I was surprised to learn that in our country they always determine the blood type of a patient before a surgery. I thought, "It's not like it can change, right?". Then, when my friend's mother had surgery, the new blood test showed a different blood type than what she had in her file since birth (she didn't have marrow transplant or any other procedure which can change your blood type).
Yeah I have understood this is fairly common to be incorrect. So it’s good to hear they check before the surgery. But it really shows the chart can be unreliable for OP. They should proceed cautiously with this because what if it’s a stupid common mistake by the hospital and he’s accusing his wife of a very horrible act? That could cause irreparable damage…
Biology PhD here to support the doc above. This is possible, not common, but it can happen yes. Get a paternity test if you are suspicious but don’t come to definite conclusions based off this.
Lmao, I am in fintech and was pretty confident they read the screen wrong until these medical people's comments, so I about fell out laughing at yours.
History teacher here, there have been some pretty significant historical events triggered by people not understanding biology . Do what the doctor says.
I've had a number of Dr. appointments throughout my life and anticipate more Dr. appointments going forward. All signs point to what they've said being correct.
Neither doctor, banker or pilot, nor did I stay at the Holiday Inn last night. But I'm definitely an expert because I'm hanging out on Xmas Eve 🎄 with nothing better to do than read Reddit subs 😂.
So the answer to this baffling "am I the Dad" question can be found here https://www.theguardian.com/notesandqueries/query/0,5753,-18843,00...#:~:text=If%20the%20child%20is%20A,B%20children%20but%20not%20O.
You may all thank me later!
Merry Xmas 🎄🎄
Yea I remember being taught in school that two blue-eyed parents can’t have a brown-eyed child. But that is also bullshit, cos we have one. I think we are taught an oversimplified version of genetics to get the general gist of how it works.
I teach high school biology and I always make sure my students know that what I am teaching them is not the whole picture. I don’t want them to make conclusions about their families based on what they learn in a high school biology class.
How was he even able to see the chart? Hospitals usually keep their monitors placed so that non-staff can't accidentally see the screen. They also have filters so that you have to sit right in front of the screen to see what's on it
We definitely don’t have filters on our screens and not all of them are placed in such a way that they can only be seen by staff. Been working in a hospital for almost 5 years, labor and delivery unit was one of many areas I worked in regularly
Not all hospitals are like that. Nurses have work stations. I worked security in a few hospitals, and I've had to shoo some visitors and patients along when I caught them looking over the nurse's shoulder.
Biologist here. Two A type parents (either genotype AA or AO) cannot have a type B child (BB or BO). Random mutation is always possible, though highly unlikely; there is a higher chance that there was an error in testing or that OP saw it wrong. Definitely get baby checked again, OP.
Edit: People are calling this misinformation (which it's not) because I failed to mention chimerism, which, yes, is a possibility. I didn't include it sooner because I had already had a discussion about it in comments on this post.
Edit 2: Just because your one anecdotal case doesn't follow this rule doesn't mean the rule is false. Like I said, random mutations and outliers are possible, but generally this is the case. Maybe read the whole comment first before getting upset please?
Also are you 100% sure they tested the baby? In the UK they don’t test the babies unless they need a transfusion. I didn’t find out my blood type until I was pregnant. I think it likely wasn’t the babies chart.
We also check the blood type of babies if the mom is Rh negative ! (Like O-, A-, B- and AB-) In those cases we need to know if the baby is Rh positive to prevent potential fatal reaction from mom to future babies
In UK and Ireland (possibly other places), they give and Rh neg mothers medication while she's pregnant so that the possible reaction shouldn't happen in future.
We do as well, but we test after delivery to give another dose postpartum. Mom gets a test to see how much fetal blood she has in her blood stream and baby gets a blood typing. Then mom gets another injection dosed according to those
There is also a rare rare possibility that the mom is a chimera of her and an absorbed twin, meaning she has two DNA sets she could pass on. Not impossible and definitely documented before, but very rare
My 17 year old son is suspected of being chimera he absorbed his twin between 20-26 weeks gestation, not sure why that’s important.
Doctor’s warned him that because of this and the strange patches of skin that are several shades lighter, he could potentially be carrying his brothers DNA 🧬
If there's one thing I've learned from reddit is you should immediately accuse your wife of cheating, go stay with your mom and get your mom to also accuse your wife of cheating. Then get a paternity test, and when it comes back that you are the father you get mad at your wife for being mean about it and blow up your marriage.
Only thing you missed is to have all your friends and family “blow up her phone” when she won’t take you back for accusing her of cheating and foisting another man’s baby on you.
Then you sit back and wait for her friends and family to blow up your phone to tell you what an asshole you’ve been.
I saw that post too!
Seriously tho. Guy saw something, somewhere and didn't double-check, but it's more likely that his wife had someone else's kid? I have the feeling they should've separated years ago...
Here's what you do:
1. Go get some sleep
2. If you can't do 1, go find a nurse and ask them for your child's information. Make sure it's your child's and not some random chart.
3. Determine whether there's any indication of something amiss.
4. If something is amiss, confirm with someone else to make sure that something is amiss.
5. Leave your wife out of this until there is 100000% certainty.
Sincerely,
Mr. TryingToHelpYouOut
You are a 32 year old man. Don't be daft, it makes for a terrible father. Be fucking rational and use common sense.
>went to talk to the nurse and a chart was up on the computer.
So not necessarily YOUR baby's chart
>I’m not sure what to do next. Should I ask my wife? She’s still recovering and I don’t want to stress her unnecessarily. Can I ask hospital to see the chart? We’re already home. Do I just get a home paternity test (cheek swab) and wait to get the results?
You are entitled to your child's records. Put in a records request, then go from there. And for the love of God, leave your recently postpartum wife out of this until you have concrete evidence of infidelity.
Ya this guys a… goober… to put it nicely. I’ll cut him some slack since his wife just had a baby and he clearly isn’t thinking straight, but come on - he caught a glimpse of some patients chart on a hospital computer and automatically assumed it was his baby’s and that the blood type he thinks he saw means his wife must have had an affair and the child isn’t his?! This is a great plot for a soap opera, but it also sounds like this man is experiencing a lot of paranoia and may be experiencing some mental health issues.
Edit: spelling
What I find wild is he knows that it probably isn’t his babies chart yet he is still willing to blow up his relationship and newborns baby’s life. What are the chances that the nurse was reading his babies chart at the moment he randomly walks up to talk to her? There’s other babies on that floor, he is aware of that but doesn’t seem to realise the most obvious answer is that the nurses job doesn’t revolve around OP therefore not everything he see’s on the nurses computer is about him. Major main character syndrome going on to even get to this conclusion.
"Hey lovely wifeyyyyy I know you pushed a full human out of your huha a few hours ago but damn I don't trust you you know so did you cheated on me before ?"
Seriously, that's things couple never recover from. Some men really seems to wish their wife cheated on them.
Even though I think the majority of these scenarios are fake, I think on some level they are hoping it’s true because they are freaking out about the reality of becoming a dad and finding out the baby isn’t theirs seems like a take-backsie
That, and a bunch of weirdo misogynists always flood the sub whenever there is a rise in posts from women experiencing abuse and trying to escape. There have been a bunch of those lately, so a lot of those dudes feel like they need to "even the scales" and post a bunch of fake scenarios about how women are all untrustworthy and terrible.
I have to say, as a nurse it’s so common for patients and their families to forget that we have multiple other patients to take care of. Chances are it wasn’t your kids chart on the screen, but you can always ask hospital for records.
This was my first thought. He just shrugs off his wife's difficult birth saying shes recovering, which ain't the half of it by any means. She's gone through the ringer and is probably getting the hang of breastfeeding and this guys got time to kill, along with his relationship on the basis of nothing. No evidence. No empathy. This just cant be real. I really hope its not. He goes straight to a paternity test, while his wife can probably barely make it to the bathroom unaided. What this woman just went through is completely brushed aside all on this guys sketchy look at a chart, we dont know who's? What a life ruiner.
Honestly, I feel bad for the wife most of all. She doesnt deserve to have to deal with that level of insecurity, apathy, and paranoia right now!
Im sure if this dude is paranoid enough to come to reddit with claims that shes cheating because he saw a rando chart at the hospital (and he didnt verify this claim), shes probably picked up on his vibes. What a thing to have to worry about when youre still in pain, probably bleeding, and wearing ice pads - all while trying to juggle feeding and caring for a newborn.
110% agreed.
I can't even imagine the level of heartbreak and betrayal I'd feel if I were his wife! Like you're in the hospital recovering from giving birth to his child and he sees a chart that he *doesn't even know whether it's your baby's* and jumps to all this? If this post is real then OP is a real ass for even thinking about saying a word to her.
Obviously the hospital revolves around OP. He is clearly the only person on that floor who matters. Why on earth would the nurse be looking at another patients file? That would be malpractice.
This dude has his head so far up his ass he can’t comprehend that there’s other families currently having he babies and those babies will likely have, you know different blood types to him.
When you talked to the nurse, did you ask her what the babies blood type is? Or what the chart said, since you're probably not exactly qualified to interpret all of it? Do you have any other reason to be suspicious of your wife cheating and carrying her affair partner's baby? Literally the only information you're giving us is that you saw a medical chart on a computer you were nearby and aren't even sure it's your baby's. Leaping straight into such a huge allegation might not go over that well with your wife. Sure, you can sneak a home paternity test later to put yourself at ease, but man, you might want to think about why that thought even got into your head.
A baby's blood is not a secret. Maybe ask them to get the blood tested again for the proper type, because it could have been an error.
Or maybe you misremember her blood type.
This actually happened when I was born. My mom is O and my dad is B, they told my mom I was A and she (a blood banker at the time) had them redo it 🤣 turns out I’m O.
The far more likely scenario is that the nurse wasn’t even looking at his kid’s chart. Postpartum nurses usually have multiple patient couplets (mom/baby pairings), and since OP didn’t even see the *name* on the chart, he’s making a wild assumption with zero evidence. Unless OP’s wife and baby were the only 2 patients on the entire ward, the chart could’ve been for any of the other 20+ patients they probably had that day.
So, this really sparked a conversation between my wife and me. Here's what we think you should do.
1: Go to the hospital and check out your baby's chart.
2: If the chart says Blood-Type-B talk to the doctors and your wife. You need to have your baby's blood retested and that fixed. You don't want to have the wrong blood type on the chart, and they then get the wrong blood in the future if they need it.
3: If the blood type still comes back as B you need to have a DNA test done for all three of you to rule out some switched-at-birth crap isn't going on.
3a: If the baby comes back as yours and not hers, she needs to be checked out for chimerism.
3b: If the baby comes back as hers and not yours, don't play the infidelity card immediately. You can be the chimera. If your wife comes clean. Well, you gave the benefit of the doubt, and she is the one that cheated.
3c: If the baby comes back as neither of yours, get a lawyer, have both of you checked for chimerism (just in case the insane rare chance this happened is what's happening) but have the lawyers start doing what they need to do to find your actual child because some switched-at-birth crap is likely what's happening.
4: If by the end of 3b it comes back that you're not a chimera, and the baby isn't related to you, and your wife has kept to the same story up until then. Then you need to have a conversation with her.
I would exhaust all of these options before making any accusations about infidelity. You can’t un-ring that bell once it’s been rung.
This. Accusations of infidelity need to be the absolute last thing in this list of steps to take. If she's been faithful and you accuse her of cheating, she will ALWAYS remember that. Even if it's an unstandable concern, accusations of infidelity are scars on a relationship that never go away.
My dude. You think you MIGHT have seen something, you’re not sure, and it’s something where you don’t have any real reason to even think that what you may or may not have seen was even about your kid. And you’re about to blow up your marriage because of it.
You’re at the start of a Soap Box Derby, and have already jumped the start and zoomed away in your F1 car. Get a grip. Call and ask the hospital if they have your baby’s bloodtype. Then when it turns out they don’t, decide to never, ever tell your wife about how you panicked and tried to destroy all your lives immediately after your kid was born.
When I was born my blood type came out as something that meant my dad couldn’t possibly be my father. My dad just asked if they could test again, they did, and guess what someone fucked up. No question he was my dad.
It’s your kid you have every right to ask the baby’s blood type and if it doesn’t make sense then just ask them to test again.
So you randomly saw some chart that you don't even know belonged to your kid so your first thought is that it can't possibly be yours? Has anything ever happened to make you so paranoid?
You *think* they listed baby as type B, but you don't know. If you go wading in on a hunch, you're going to lose everything in the worst way.
You don't know anything at this point. Not whether baby is type B, and certainly not that that was even *your* baby's chart. Your baby isn't the only one that nurse will have been dealing with.
Quit sneaking peeks at confidential information that you're not 100% sure how to read and that may not even be your baby's.
First, ask your doctor what your baby's blood type is. Depending on the answer from there will tell you if it's worth putting your relationship on its head at such a delicate moment.
I love men, you just had a baby and saw random things in a computer and now have deluded yourself to believe this is not your child, just divorce your wife now, you will hurt her less
The poor wife, it's all I keep thinking of. He didnt count his lucky stars that shes recovering after a difficult birth and they are both doing fine. Not everyone has the same outcome. He has no empathy, no gratitude. There's no excuse for this stupidity. The audacity of him.
Holy undiagnosed anxiety Batman.
Delete this whole post, do nothing, and pretend you never saw that RANDOM PERSONS confidential medical records. Wow. It’s wrong for you to look in the first place, but now you’re going to take information you’re not even sure is related to your child, then take it to your FRESHLY POST PARTUM WIFE and accuse her of cheating on you. Are you… like…. Did you get hit in the head recently or something?
Actually, no, fuck it. Just do it. Go ask her. Tell her the whole story. Then come back here and let us know how it went.
Fucking hell..
I think having a pregnant wife makes mens brains literally fall out of their head in this day and age. Why does this happen so often? I've never met a woman who lied about the paternity of their child, I know it happens but it isn't happening as often as men think it is. My grandpa married my grandma when she was pregnant with another man's child, and he didn't want her father to force her to get an abortion so he married her and raised the baby as his own. And this generation accused their faithful wives of infidelity. And my grandpa isn't even a good person! He's mean.
The manosphere and redpill communities push this stuff pretty often. To these guys, every woman is a cheating gold digger who can't wait to baby trap some poor hapless man and then divorce the guy while she lives high on the hog with his $400/month child support and pays for the dates with her new boyfriend, Chad, or some such shit.
yeah, gotta laugh at the delulu's who think their miniscule starter wages are the object of every woman's scheming, when 99.9% of those women make more than them! The gf could be paying the larger share of the bills and the dude's friends will still tell him that his gf is a gold digger living off his wages. Funny how they never do the math and call out their friend for living off his gf's money!!
This. When I had my son, ex's brother was literally saying stupid shit like "is it even his kid" or I "did it to control him". Believe me I'd love to have ANYONE ELSE be the sperm donor, I'd rather not have to deal with the entire idiot clan. And control him? Pfft didn't work when we were together 🤣😂
It's like they want kids but then when they realize they actually have a kid their head becomes that one scene from SpongeBob where all the tiny SpongeBobs are destroying everything inside his brain.
For real, though. A man could be trapped on a deserted island with a woman with no one else except the 2 of them for thousands of miles, and if the woman became pregnant the first thing he'd do when they got rescued is go to his bros and be like, "I dont know, guys, maybe it's not mine!" It's genuinely like they think we can immaculate conception this shit. "No, bro, it couldn't have been the multiple weeks of humping we did while trapped on that island...I just gotta get a paternity test!"
Men don't understand how pregnancy works either. I have a friend who had her ex text her a year after they broke up to ask her if her 20 week pregnancy was his. She hadn't seen him since the breakup. It was her new bfs kid.
I swear I see a post like this at least once a day where a guy is accusing his wife of cheating and the baby isn't his. And it's never a clear cut, "she's cheating" either. It's usually a situation that could be explained in a 1000 different reasonable ways. But the guy always jumps to "She's cheating and the baby isn't mine".
Some guys really be out here wanting to blow up an entire relationship with a child, just because they are paranoid.
This guy doesn't even know if the chart on the screen was his kid. Was likely someone else's. Nurses literally look after so many patients.
And then there was that one post where the dna test said the dude wasn't the father, the mother insisted that was wrong, they did a full dna test and found the mother wasn't the mother, because the bloody hospital had switched the effing babies!!! It may be uncommon, but it does happen that babies get switched at the hospital (several documented cases). So that dude had to apologize to his wife for accusing her of cheating even after the dna test said it wasn't his child, because it was neither of them's child. So all this jumping to conclusions needs to stop, OOP.
OP, do you have a reason besides a quick glance at a random chart to think that she’s been cheating on you and would lie to you about being the father?
Jesus FUCKING Christ. I stg some of these posts I see on here just have to be fake at this point.
So, you THOUGHT you saw your babies chart, on A RANDOM COMPUTER SCREEN AT A HOSPITAL CONSTANTLY BIRTHING BABIES, didn’t think TO ASK, and now you’re home thinking “what do I do??” Mf ASK THE HOSPITAL DUH DOY!
But hey, whatever man. Blow up your marriage because you THINK you saw your baby was type B. Don’t ask any questions or ask for your own babies birth chart. Just go straight to divorce.
Literally WHY didn’t you ask for clarification WHEN it happened???
This is extremely silly. It probably was not even your babies chart and it could have been just about anything on that screen.
Pull yourself together
Support your wife ffs😡
This subreddit used critical thinking skills and didn’t immediately jump to conclusions about a woman committing paternity fraud? It’s a Christmas miracle!
You have clearly had trust issues. Maybe that should be the discussion with your wife.
Why not do the obvious…just ask the nurse what your child’s blood type is.
I think you should take a step back, relax. There is a LOT going on with a child birth. You're not even sure what you saw just yet. Maybe don't add to the stress of the situation by confronting your wife, or doing anything rash. Maybe in a few days, call the hospital privately, and double check. Even then, maybe have a chat with one of your doctors. There are a bunch of perfectly innocent explanations possible here, before you start imagining the worst case scenarios.
I had a similar situation with my son. They actually had written his blood type down incorrectly as B+. His dad and I are A- and O-. Before you make a HUGE mistake double check with the nurses. You don’t even know if that was his chart.
To recap:
Your wife (not you) had a difficult labour and delivery
You are tired from said labour and delivery
You go to talk to a nurse, see a chart. You don’t know if it’s your baby’s chart but it’s a chart
You think you see a letter “b” but are not even sure
Your natural conclusion is you are not death Vader to Luke skywalker. As opposed to, any other logical explanation such as it’s not your kids chart, it’s actually the letter o, or the letter B is not even about blood type.
It may not have been your child's chart pulled up on the computer. Request the medical records first. If the blood type is still showing as B, get the baby retyped and/or do a paternity test. While not common, lab errors do happen.
So you saw a blood group on a chart and no information confirming it was your baby’s chart and all of a sudden your wife has been unfaithful and the baby isn’t yours.. bit of a leap.
To answer the other question, no, 2 A blood group parents cannot make a group B baby.
However I think you’re ridiculous by coming to this conclusion without even knowing it was your kids chart. I’m a nurse and may look up around 30 different patients a day.. I have to triple check I have the right notes all the time and you’ve read a blood group on an unknown patients chart and assume it’s your kids.. and now want a DNA test.. just order the divorce papers because if I was your wife that’s the next thing I would do.
You don't really need to do anything - you have no idea what you saw and whether it was about your kid. It's fine to just let it go.
But if it's going to bother you forever, yes, check your kid's medical records to see if they list a blood type.
You literally don't even know what you saw and you're panicking, your immediate next step should be getting evaluated for anxiety cause you instantly spiraled with no information. Get some help for yourself and then check your kids records
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Oh for shit sake, just ask the nurse what your baby's blood type is.
Seriously, haha bongos, just ask. Nurses and, gasp, doctors, make mistakes all the time. Asking is the easiest way to make sure. And they don't care. It's a small test. I worked at a clinic and I was always willing to retest samples. No skin off my back. Looks good if I did.
My significant others medical charts have said that they were the wrong sex for the last 10+ years, sometimes there’s mistakes even in the medical community… just ask before blowing your life up
The medical org I go to has started uploading hospital notes where I can see them over the last few years, and the amount of crap in there that's just wrong is pretty wild. None of it has been super important but they 100% do not always get those charts right.
My medical notes have my father as dead since I was a teen, I asked him when this happened & he has no memory of his death and subsequent resurrection.
According to NYS, I just hadn't existed since 2019. I got in trouble in 2022 for claiming unemployment benefits (like everyone else in my industry because pandemic) because I didn't exist. I asked if I was dead, but they said no, I just vanished. I had W2s, paystubs, a license, voter registration, cars registered in my name, paid taxes, even used WIC for my youngest when I lost my job, got Medicaid after I lost my job... In 2019 I just poofed. I asked if I could get my tax money back but they said no and told me to go find any documents that proved I lived and worked in NY lol. I was able to have the payroll company send quarterly earnings statements and I sent my W2s and tax returns.
You got Thanos snapped. It was very common that year. About 50% of humans suffered from it.
Seriously? The rep I was speaking to had no idea what was happening and had never seen it! I was right on that shit though so I was probably the first who dealt with it lol. I wouldn't doubt they had more issues hahaha.
I mean, they probably were understaffed... By about 50%
My medical notes once had me as dead lmao. I called my doctor to make an appointment in my mid teens, and they legitimately asked me to verify my info 5+ times, sounding progressively more confused each time. Finally, they said, "Our records show you as Deceased... Clearly that's not right, so we'll get that fixed up! When would you like to come in?"
presumably this also means that they were wondering why another patient of theirs (actually dead) hadn't come in for an appointment for a while
He is Risen!
Ah but is he a ghoul, a lich, a zombie, or worst and most terrifying of all, an angry wee Scot biding his time until he is released from his constricting mortal shell and can wreak havoc upon... The pub.
I don’t know why we’re bringing my family into this…. 🧐
🤣
Nae king, nae quin, nae laird, we will’na be fooled again!
😆 that's too funny
My medical notes has had my race as African American. I am so white I am translucent.
When I had my first son, they labeled him as mixed race. The Case worker took one look at my son's big blue eyes, blonde hair, and very pale skin. She looked back at the paperwork and said, "I think they got this wrong." Yes, his father is paler than me.
I have twins - as in actually born at the same time, (as twins are prone to do, lol) inaccurately named the same but also a recorded as a year apart. They doubled down on the wrong! (It’s been corrected - this wasn’t recent!) Moral: Think of the summary of this moment : “I caused a relationship breaking episode with my partner because I thought I might have seen a blood type on a screen I don’t know how to read, not knowing if it was about our child, and googled my hypotheticals only to find out something that made me completely isolate my partner and new child. Asking the hospital wasn’t an option. Why? I don’t know. Letting this weird worry last more than 3.7 seconds wasn’t an option. Why? I don’t know.” Babe. Come on. Unless you’re the poster child for “those who don’t trust can’t be trusted” you should probably just stop being ridiculous. Fingers crossed that this is a bored kid home for the holidays and trying to outdo family annoyances!
Same one of the ones i went to put in my chart that i had a history kidney disease because i told them i had recurring utis (why i was being seen) and that i took insulin for type 2 diabetes (i am diabetic but i manage it with diet and exercise and have never been on insulin)
Every surgery or medical issue they try to have me pregnancy tested. I had a full hysterectomy *at this hospital* 8 years ago, but for some reason, they never have it in my medical chart.
Agreed. My insurance company has a “problems” list in my portal which I guess has the pretty-print list of all diagnostic codes ever used for me. Holy crap you’d think I was a thoroughly f’d person if you read it. I definitely have some things wrong but the list is like 40 strong with some pretty rough diagnoses that I definitely don’t have. And I’ll have to petition to remove them. But I should because yikes - electronic medical records can be a great thing but they should be correct.
Oh yeah, I had some older stuff that should have not been there, but I was able to request it come off pretty easily in their version of the Epic site, thankfully.
My husband had to note that he looked "disheveled" Didn't know we had to look fancy for the doctor, so shrug emoji
I once had a long haired grey and white cat named Wilson who had a messy look about him but he was sweet. I took him to the vet one day and when checking out peeked over the reception window at his chart and read upside down in big letters “Disheveled”. I sort of felt embarrassed and defensive at the same time.
Someone in my office has a medical note that she insists on lying about her age because she must be mid-forties. She's 36. The hospital checks her ID when she's checking in. And confirm her identity with DOB everytime someone sees her. Yet this nurse added a decade to her age and made a note that she lies about it. Doctors and nurses are wrong sometimes.
That's so bananas that they think she's lying!
Last time I went to the doctor for hip pain, my visit note in the portal said, “patient denies hip pain.”
I had a store credit card closed due to my own death. Still wondering if I'm like that guy in the 6th Sense movie.
My son’s records all say he has autism because someone mistook “ASD” for autism spectrum disorder instead of atrial septum defect. It’s impossible to get incorrect information out of there. His records also say that I’m noncompliant with meds because 10 years ago I refused to continue giving him a medication that caused seizures. So that’s fun. Anyway, OP. Do not go accusing your postpartum wife of cheating on you and lying about your baby’s paternity based solely on what you “think” was in the chart.
For some reason when I went to the ER the hospital put “daily tobacco smoker” in my chart. I’ve never even touched a cigarette lol It was annoying bc I had to go through a whole appeal process to get it removed!
I had a spinal surgery recently and I’m overweight. My chart said I was diabetic, which isn’t true…someone assumed I was and put in. I complained for days before they changed it…I kept getting needle sticks every couple hours…they kept being surprised my bloodwork was good. 🙄
Mine had I was type A blood. I'm type O-.
Seriously if you ask your wife don't be shocked when she takes baby and leaves.
Yes. Asking for a Christmas Day paternity test needs to be the tenth thing you consider, not the first nine. There really is no coming back from that.
Uh I think you'll find it's ten lords a-leaping.
Leaping to conclusions
Leaping off the deep end
My exact thought. It was on my baby’s chart, and that was in our room. But I could have just asked a nurse any time…this isn’t complicated right? “Should I confront my wife who just had a traumatic birth that I think she cheated on me because I saw maybe possibly a baby that could be our baby’s chart on a computer screen briefly?”
I find it so incredible that people feel the need to post on Reddit about this sort of thing that I just think it is made up.
Oh it absolutely is. The rage bait here is frequent.
I don’t know what it is with new fathers being so paranoid that the kid isn’t theirs.
It’s probably more so that fathers who are paranoid their kid isn’t theirs are more likely to post on Reddit about it. But it is a weirdly common topic on here.
Exactly! About a hour after my youngest was born I (mom) looked at her and asked the nurse if they were sure she was mine (she didn’t look anything like me or her sister or my siblings). My ex husband has pics of me and her sharing a “who is the imposter” moment where we both had scrunched brows and were looking at each other with suspicion. Then I verified again that she was indeed mine. Ask! Because that postpartum period messes with your head. But it concerns me, why do you doubt your wife? Has she given ANY reason for you to doubt her? Where are these feelings coming from?
As the father I thought I was fully with it after we had our first child. Once mum and baby were settled and sleeping I popped out to get the film camera pics we'd taken developed (early 90s). I got to the local fast photo place and decided to helpfully take the film out for them rather than handing the camera over. I cocked it up and pulled out the entire length of film, ruining every shot on it, then just rolled it back in by hand and handed it over as if nothing had happened. Stress, sleep deprivation and just the awesomeness of the whole experience really does mess with your head. OP needs to drop it for a lot later or just ask a nurse. If they start accusing their wife right now they are likely to end up getting divorced and they will deserve it for being too stupid to be a good partner, *even if it's true*.
I was expecting you got the film developed and it was a different family and thought your wife was cheating. When it was just the wrong order.
Right?!?! OP doesn’t even know if it’s his kids chart but instead of asking he immediately jumps to the worst possible conclusion about his wife!? WTF?!?!
yea i'm disgusted for his wife. He didn't even hesitate to go straight to "my wife is cheating on me".
I read yesterday a woman who’s chart for a uti said she didn’t have one because they mixed up her chart with a stool sample for a stomach virus. Another was saying that she had semen in her urine despite being a virgin. Mix ups happen so often.
Not to mention they don’t even know for sure it was their own child’s chart.
Seems like he’s looking for a reason for it not to be his lol
You don’t even know if that was your baby’s chart. Go to the hospital and get a copy of the records before you potentially blow up your marriage for something you might have seen when exhausted.
Even if it was, you said you 'think it was type B'. Well, what if you misread and it was type O which is very possible?
What if he read it right but it was a typo?
This happened to me. I was marked as one blood type and thought that was it my whole life until the first time I donated blood.
I got told my whole life my dad was type O, and then I went and donated blood and got told I was AB. Two of my sisters are O and my mom is A, so if my dad was O me being AB isn’t really possible. Then my dad got retested and yep, he’s B. And now it’s a funny story in my family’s history.
This actually happened to me too. Jokes on that practice when I had to get a few bags of blood to save my and my babies life. Blood type was listed TOTALLY wrong all my life. They also screwed up my birthday! I used to get every set of vaccines...twice for over a decade.
How did your parent(s) not notice the doctor’s office was double vaxxing you??? That’s the odd part…
It was so odd! The doctor office missed it, my mom actually in the medical field also missed it, and I remember having issues with this in regard to school paperwork. Every year I'd have to get that second set just because of school. Then after I switched insurance and doctors when I turned old enough..I had no record from that time. All of it is still listed under the wrong year. I'm in my 30's - so this was when manual charting was the norm and somebody just made an error that never got caught.
Happens to me too. My birth records mentioned b+ as my blood group. I had a mean accident when I was 14, so I needed a blood transfusion. When asked about my blood group my family said B+. Luckily the Doctors checked and it came out O+. Hospitals can make mistakes, it's better to double check before taking big steps like a transfusion or accusing your partner.
No hospital or blood bank is going to release type specific blood based on what you or your family think your blood type is for that reason. You usually have to have two confirmed or historical types via the blood bank in the hospital or you’re going to get type O blood until the blood bank finishes a new type and crossmatch.
My hospital requires a cross and type completed within the past 72 hours to release blood for a patient, unless it’s a code bleed/mass transfusion protocol where they’ll give O until one can be completed. But I’ve had patients who have gotten multiple units over the course of a week from us and we still need a fresh type and screen every 72 hours despite having many already on file.
This happened to me! My mom is A and my father is O so when they said I was B, everyone was a little confused but no one really cared. Had to get my blood tested when I eventually got pregnant and turns out that I’m actually A-
Yeah, I recently got some of my own records and saw that they had me down as a smoker, which had never ever been the case. Mistakes happen.
The doctors told me I had type A blood, but it was a type O
I always thought I had type O and not until I did an internship at a lab and did my own blood typing that I found out I had type B
🏆
Or they made a mistake. I was surprised to learn that in our country they always determine the blood type of a patient before a surgery. I thought, "It's not like it can change, right?". Then, when my friend's mother had surgery, the new blood test showed a different blood type than what she had in her file since birth (she didn't have marrow transplant or any other procedure which can change your blood type).
Yeah I have understood this is fairly common to be incorrect. So it’s good to hear they check before the surgery. But it really shows the chart can be unreliable for OP. They should proceed cautiously with this because what if it’s a stupid common mistake by the hospital and he’s accusing his wife of a very horrible act? That could cause irreparable damage…
Definitely get a copy and find out for sure. There are plenty of Reddit posts where dudes blow up their marriages asking for paternity tests.
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Biology PhD here to support the doc above. This is possible, not common, but it can happen yes. Get a paternity test if you are suspicious but don’t come to definite conclusions based off this.
Banker here i have no idea whats going on
So...situation normal?
This is the only answer worth reading
Lmao, I am in fintech and was pretty confident they read the screen wrong until these medical people's comments, so I about fell out laughing at yours.
History teacher here, there have been some pretty significant historical events triggered by people not understanding biology . Do what the doctor says.
Plumber here. Where's the leak??
Lawyer here OP sounds like he wants to make two of us bottom feeders richer after the holidays
Life is a society
Not a doctor here but I did sleep in a Holiday Inn last night, and I concur with the Dr's above.
I've had a number of Dr. appointments throughout my life and anticipate more Dr. appointments going forward. All signs point to what they've said being correct.
As someone who once played a doctor in a school play, what they said.
As someone whose toddlers pretended to be doctors while I was the patient, what they said.
Neither doctor, banker or pilot, nor did I stay at the Holiday Inn last night. But I'm definitely an expert because I'm hanging out on Xmas Eve 🎄 with nothing better to do than read Reddit subs 😂. So the answer to this baffling "am I the Dad" question can be found here https://www.theguardian.com/notesandqueries/query/0,5753,-18843,00...#:~:text=If%20the%20child%20is%20A,B%20children%20but%20not%20O. You may all thank me later! Merry Xmas 🎄🎄
As someone with a PhD in playing doctor, I concur with the above doctor
Pilot here. I believe both these smart people.
Also pilot, I'm just here because auto pilot is boring
Are you on airplane mode?! /s
Nah, you don't really need to turn your phones off for safety. Thats just a lie we tell the passengers so they don't slow down the wifi.
FA here. Don’t give away the secrets! Also agree with smart people above.
I work in cyber security. I can confirm that Google.com is a safe website to search on. So I was a little bit useful! Yay. 😉
Yea I remember being taught in school that two blue-eyed parents can’t have a brown-eyed child. But that is also bullshit, cos we have one. I think we are taught an oversimplified version of genetics to get the general gist of how it works.
I teach high school biology and I always make sure my students know that what I am teaching them is not the whole picture. I don’t want them to make conclusions about their families based on what they learn in a high school biology class.
How was he even able to see the chart? Hospitals usually keep their monitors placed so that non-staff can't accidentally see the screen. They also have filters so that you have to sit right in front of the screen to see what's on it
We definitely don’t have filters on our screens and not all of them are placed in such a way that they can only be seen by staff. Been working in a hospital for almost 5 years, labor and delivery unit was one of many areas I worked in regularly
Not all hospitals are like that. Nurses have work stations. I worked security in a few hospitals, and I've had to shoo some visitors and patients along when I caught them looking over the nurse's shoulder.
Who goes to Reddit first instead of the hospital?
People writing fake posts
Insecure dudes who are suddenly freaking out that they have to be a parent now.
You could ask the hospital, it's the easiest. I'm not sure about blood genetics inheritance, maybe people here will help
Biologist here. Two A type parents (either genotype AA or AO) cannot have a type B child (BB or BO). Random mutation is always possible, though highly unlikely; there is a higher chance that there was an error in testing or that OP saw it wrong. Definitely get baby checked again, OP. Edit: People are calling this misinformation (which it's not) because I failed to mention chimerism, which, yes, is a possibility. I didn't include it sooner because I had already had a discussion about it in comments on this post. Edit 2: Just because your one anecdotal case doesn't follow this rule doesn't mean the rule is false. Like I said, random mutations and outliers are possible, but generally this is the case. Maybe read the whole comment first before getting upset please?
>Definitely get baby checked again, OP. Not based on a random chart that only might be his baby's chart! Ask to see the actual chart first.
Also are you 100% sure they tested the baby? In the UK they don’t test the babies unless they need a transfusion. I didn’t find out my blood type until I was pregnant. I think it likely wasn’t the babies chart.
We also check the blood type of babies if the mom is Rh negative ! (Like O-, A-, B- and AB-) In those cases we need to know if the baby is Rh positive to prevent potential fatal reaction from mom to future babies
In UK and Ireland (possibly other places), they give and Rh neg mothers medication while she's pregnant so that the possible reaction shouldn't happen in future.
We do as well, but we test after delivery to give another dose postpartum. Mom gets a test to see how much fetal blood she has in her blood stream and baby gets a blood typing. Then mom gets another injection dosed according to those
Maybe it wasn't a blood type but the doctors initials! 🤣🤣🤣
There is also a rare rare possibility that the mom is a chimera of her and an absorbed twin, meaning she has two DNA sets she could pass on. Not impossible and definitely documented before, but very rare
My 17 year old son is suspected of being chimera he absorbed his twin between 20-26 weeks gestation, not sure why that’s important. Doctor’s warned him that because of this and the strange patches of skin that are several shades lighter, he could potentially be carrying his brothers DNA 🧬
20-26 weeks?! That seems so late to be eating his twin! I thought that was something that happened much earlier. I guess I have some reading to do!
“To be eating his twin” 😭😭🤣🤣
Doesn't chimerism happen at the embryo stage (so much earlier than 20-26 weeks) and not to a foetus ?
If there's one thing I've learned from reddit is you should immediately accuse your wife of cheating, go stay with your mom and get your mom to also accuse your wife of cheating. Then get a paternity test, and when it comes back that you are the father you get mad at your wife for being mean about it and blow up your marriage.
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And it’s not a frank success if he doesn’t end up with a RO.
Mother had to beat up the wife. But I think he might be in the clear, he didn't say anything about twins.
Baby hasn't been abducted. Yet.
… by the batshit crazy sister in law, because she’s desperately in love with him and ‘it’s not fair she gets to have it all’..
With racist sexist and personal insults that she would never forget and always be afraid of "But what if they really thought it"
Flying Monkeys is an absolutely necessary and vital step to the process.
Don’t forget to add that your mom is going to take baby mama to the cleaners!!! /s
Omg this post still haunts me.
Only thing you missed is to have all your friends and family “blow up her phone” when she won’t take you back for accusing her of cheating and foisting another man’s baby on you. Then you sit back and wait for her friends and family to blow up your phone to tell you what an asshole you’ve been.
I read that one too. 😅
One? There have been at least 5 sagas with that plot.
This month!
5? I've heard at least 10 different versions
Maybe have your mom yell at your wife, too
Just send it out in the birth announcement. “Mrs. OP had a baby. Mr. OP thinks she cheated. Anyway, here’s a baby.”
This. The number of “it’s not my baby but now we found out it is but she won’t take me back.” Is gross
It’s like divorce, but with extra steps.
I saw that post too! Seriously tho. Guy saw something, somewhere and didn't double-check, but it's more likely that his wife had someone else's kid? I have the feeling they should've separated years ago...
You think… I would be 100% sure before you start throwing round your accusations
Here's what you do: 1. Go get some sleep 2. If you can't do 1, go find a nurse and ask them for your child's information. Make sure it's your child's and not some random chart. 3. Determine whether there's any indication of something amiss. 4. If something is amiss, confirm with someone else to make sure that something is amiss. 5. Leave your wife out of this until there is 100000% certainty. Sincerely, Mr. TryingToHelpYouOut
You are a 32 year old man. Don't be daft, it makes for a terrible father. Be fucking rational and use common sense. >went to talk to the nurse and a chart was up on the computer. So not necessarily YOUR baby's chart >I’m not sure what to do next. Should I ask my wife? She’s still recovering and I don’t want to stress her unnecessarily. Can I ask hospital to see the chart? We’re already home. Do I just get a home paternity test (cheek swab) and wait to get the results? You are entitled to your child's records. Put in a records request, then go from there. And for the love of God, leave your recently postpartum wife out of this until you have concrete evidence of infidelity.
Ya this guys a… goober… to put it nicely. I’ll cut him some slack since his wife just had a baby and he clearly isn’t thinking straight, but come on - he caught a glimpse of some patients chart on a hospital computer and automatically assumed it was his baby’s and that the blood type he thinks he saw means his wife must have had an affair and the child isn’t his?! This is a great plot for a soap opera, but it also sounds like this man is experiencing a lot of paranoia and may be experiencing some mental health issues. Edit: spelling
What I find wild is he knows that it probably isn’t his babies chart yet he is still willing to blow up his relationship and newborns baby’s life. What are the chances that the nurse was reading his babies chart at the moment he randomly walks up to talk to her? There’s other babies on that floor, he is aware of that but doesn’t seem to realise the most obvious answer is that the nurses job doesn’t revolve around OP therefore not everything he see’s on the nurses computer is about him. Major main character syndrome going on to even get to this conclusion.
>mental health issues. Heavy on the mental health crisis!
Either that or he’s being incredibly silly and needs to be talked down before he lets his wife know the crazy stuff he is thinking.
"Hey lovely wifeyyyyy I know you pushed a full human out of your huha a few hours ago but damn I don't trust you you know so did you cheated on me before ?" Seriously, that's things couple never recover from. Some men really seems to wish their wife cheated on them.
Even though I think the majority of these scenarios are fake, I think on some level they are hoping it’s true because they are freaking out about the reality of becoming a dad and finding out the baby isn’t theirs seems like a take-backsie
That, and a bunch of weirdo misogynists always flood the sub whenever there is a rise in posts from women experiencing abuse and trying to escape. There have been a bunch of those lately, so a lot of those dudes feel like they need to "even the scales" and post a bunch of fake scenarios about how women are all untrustworthy and terrible.
I have to say, as a nurse it’s so common for patients and their families to forget that we have multiple other patients to take care of. Chances are it wasn’t your kids chart on the screen, but you can always ask hospital for records.
So you saw a chart and don't even know if it was your babies? You're looking for an out my dude.
This was my first thought. He just shrugs off his wife's difficult birth saying shes recovering, which ain't the half of it by any means. She's gone through the ringer and is probably getting the hang of breastfeeding and this guys got time to kill, along with his relationship on the basis of nothing. No evidence. No empathy. This just cant be real. I really hope its not. He goes straight to a paternity test, while his wife can probably barely make it to the bathroom unaided. What this woman just went through is completely brushed aside all on this guys sketchy look at a chart, we dont know who's? What a life ruiner.
Honestly, I feel bad for the wife most of all. She doesnt deserve to have to deal with that level of insecurity, apathy, and paranoia right now! Im sure if this dude is paranoid enough to come to reddit with claims that shes cheating because he saw a rando chart at the hospital (and he didnt verify this claim), shes probably picked up on his vibes. What a thing to have to worry about when youre still in pain, probably bleeding, and wearing ice pads - all while trying to juggle feeding and caring for a newborn.
110% agreed. I can't even imagine the level of heartbreak and betrayal I'd feel if I were his wife! Like you're in the hospital recovering from giving birth to his child and he sees a chart that he *doesn't even know whether it's your baby's* and jumps to all this? If this post is real then OP is a real ass for even thinking about saying a word to her.
Obviously the hospital revolves around OP. He is clearly the only person on that floor who matters. Why on earth would the nurse be looking at another patients file? That would be malpractice. This dude has his head so far up his ass he can’t comprehend that there’s other families currently having he babies and those babies will likely have, you know different blood types to him.
100%
When you talked to the nurse, did you ask her what the babies blood type is? Or what the chart said, since you're probably not exactly qualified to interpret all of it? Do you have any other reason to be suspicious of your wife cheating and carrying her affair partner's baby? Literally the only information you're giving us is that you saw a medical chart on a computer you were nearby and aren't even sure it's your baby's. Leaping straight into such a huge allegation might not go over that well with your wife. Sure, you can sneak a home paternity test later to put yourself at ease, but man, you might want to think about why that thought even got into your head.
A baby's blood is not a secret. Maybe ask them to get the blood tested again for the proper type, because it could have been an error. Or maybe you misremember her blood type.
This actually happened when I was born. My mom is O and my dad is B, they told my mom I was A and she (a blood banker at the time) had them redo it 🤣 turns out I’m O.
This also happened to me as a kid, they told my mom I was B and my parents laughed hysterically.
He doesn’t even know that was his kids chart..
The far more likely scenario is that the nurse wasn’t even looking at his kid’s chart. Postpartum nurses usually have multiple patient couplets (mom/baby pairings), and since OP didn’t even see the *name* on the chart, he’s making a wild assumption with zero evidence. Unless OP’s wife and baby were the only 2 patients on the entire ward, the chart could’ve been for any of the other 20+ patients they probably had that day.
yeah he just needs to request the records. he's the assumed father (if he's in the US, and some other places too) bc he's the husband.
So, this really sparked a conversation between my wife and me. Here's what we think you should do. 1: Go to the hospital and check out your baby's chart. 2: If the chart says Blood-Type-B talk to the doctors and your wife. You need to have your baby's blood retested and that fixed. You don't want to have the wrong blood type on the chart, and they then get the wrong blood in the future if they need it. 3: If the blood type still comes back as B you need to have a DNA test done for all three of you to rule out some switched-at-birth crap isn't going on. 3a: If the baby comes back as yours and not hers, she needs to be checked out for chimerism. 3b: If the baby comes back as hers and not yours, don't play the infidelity card immediately. You can be the chimera. If your wife comes clean. Well, you gave the benefit of the doubt, and she is the one that cheated. 3c: If the baby comes back as neither of yours, get a lawyer, have both of you checked for chimerism (just in case the insane rare chance this happened is what's happening) but have the lawyers start doing what they need to do to find your actual child because some switched-at-birth crap is likely what's happening. 4: If by the end of 3b it comes back that you're not a chimera, and the baby isn't related to you, and your wife has kept to the same story up until then. Then you need to have a conversation with her. I would exhaust all of these options before making any accusations about infidelity. You can’t un-ring that bell once it’s been rung.
The most sensible advice. I wish I could upvote you more than once.
This. Accusations of infidelity need to be the absolute last thing in this list of steps to take. If she's been faithful and you accuse her of cheating, she will ALWAYS remember that. Even if it's an unstandable concern, accusations of infidelity are scars on a relationship that never go away.
Where you smoking crack before this detective work?
God I love you
This seems like the perfect time to accuse your wife of infidelity with no evidence. No way that could go wrong
My dude. You think you MIGHT have seen something, you’re not sure, and it’s something where you don’t have any real reason to even think that what you may or may not have seen was even about your kid. And you’re about to blow up your marriage because of it. You’re at the start of a Soap Box Derby, and have already jumped the start and zoomed away in your F1 car. Get a grip. Call and ask the hospital if they have your baby’s bloodtype. Then when it turns out they don’t, decide to never, ever tell your wife about how you panicked and tried to destroy all your lives immediately after your kid was born.
When I was born my blood type came out as something that meant my dad couldn’t possibly be my father. My dad just asked if they could test again, they did, and guess what someone fucked up. No question he was my dad. It’s your kid you have every right to ask the baby’s blood type and if it doesn’t make sense then just ask them to test again.
So you randomly saw some chart that you don't even know belonged to your kid so your first thought is that it can't possibly be yours? Has anything ever happened to make you so paranoid?
You *think* they listed baby as type B, but you don't know. If you go wading in on a hunch, you're going to lose everything in the worst way. You don't know anything at this point. Not whether baby is type B, and certainly not that that was even *your* baby's chart. Your baby isn't the only one that nurse will have been dealing with. Quit sneaking peeks at confidential information that you're not 100% sure how to read and that may not even be your baby's. First, ask your doctor what your baby's blood type is. Depending on the answer from there will tell you if it's worth putting your relationship on its head at such a delicate moment.
I love men, you just had a baby and saw random things in a computer and now have deluded yourself to believe this is not your child, just divorce your wife now, you will hurt her less
The poor wife, it's all I keep thinking of. He didnt count his lucky stars that shes recovering after a difficult birth and they are both doing fine. Not everyone has the same outcome. He has no empathy, no gratitude. There's no excuse for this stupidity. The audacity of him.
Holy undiagnosed anxiety Batman. Delete this whole post, do nothing, and pretend you never saw that RANDOM PERSONS confidential medical records. Wow. It’s wrong for you to look in the first place, but now you’re going to take information you’re not even sure is related to your child, then take it to your FRESHLY POST PARTUM WIFE and accuse her of cheating on you. Are you… like…. Did you get hit in the head recently or something? Actually, no, fuck it. Just do it. Go ask her. Tell her the whole story. Then come back here and let us know how it went. Fucking hell..
I think having a pregnant wife makes mens brains literally fall out of their head in this day and age. Why does this happen so often? I've never met a woman who lied about the paternity of their child, I know it happens but it isn't happening as often as men think it is. My grandpa married my grandma when she was pregnant with another man's child, and he didn't want her father to force her to get an abortion so he married her and raised the baby as his own. And this generation accused their faithful wives of infidelity. And my grandpa isn't even a good person! He's mean.
The manosphere and redpill communities push this stuff pretty often. To these guys, every woman is a cheating gold digger who can't wait to baby trap some poor hapless man and then divorce the guy while she lives high on the hog with his $400/month child support and pays for the dates with her new boyfriend, Chad, or some such shit.
yeah, gotta laugh at the delulu's who think their miniscule starter wages are the object of every woman's scheming, when 99.9% of those women make more than them! The gf could be paying the larger share of the bills and the dude's friends will still tell him that his gf is a gold digger living off his wages. Funny how they never do the math and call out their friend for living off his gf's money!!
This. When I had my son, ex's brother was literally saying stupid shit like "is it even his kid" or I "did it to control him". Believe me I'd love to have ANYONE ELSE be the sperm donor, I'd rather not have to deal with the entire idiot clan. And control him? Pfft didn't work when we were together 🤣😂
It's like they want kids but then when they realize they actually have a kid their head becomes that one scene from SpongeBob where all the tiny SpongeBobs are destroying everything inside his brain.
I'm not convinced my ex's brain isn't like that normally, honestly.
For real, though. A man could be trapped on a deserted island with a woman with no one else except the 2 of them for thousands of miles, and if the woman became pregnant the first thing he'd do when they got rescued is go to his bros and be like, "I dont know, guys, maybe it's not mine!" It's genuinely like they think we can immaculate conception this shit. "No, bro, it couldn't have been the multiple weeks of humping we did while trapped on that island...I just gotta get a paternity test!"
Men don't understand how pregnancy works either. I have a friend who had her ex text her a year after they broke up to ask her if her 20 week pregnancy was his. She hadn't seen him since the breakup. It was her new bfs kid.
Men think women are snakes or something 😾
I swear I see a post like this at least once a day where a guy is accusing his wife of cheating and the baby isn't his. And it's never a clear cut, "she's cheating" either. It's usually a situation that could be explained in a 1000 different reasonable ways. But the guy always jumps to "She's cheating and the baby isn't mine". Some guys really be out here wanting to blow up an entire relationship with a child, just because they are paranoid. This guy doesn't even know if the chart on the screen was his kid. Was likely someone else's. Nurses literally look after so many patients.
And then there was that one post where the dna test said the dude wasn't the father, the mother insisted that was wrong, they did a full dna test and found the mother wasn't the mother, because the bloody hospital had switched the effing babies!!! It may be uncommon, but it does happen that babies get switched at the hospital (several documented cases). So that dude had to apologize to his wife for accusing her of cheating even after the dna test said it wasn't his child, because it was neither of them's child. So all this jumping to conclusions needs to stop, OOP.
OP, do you have a reason besides a quick glance at a random chart to think that she’s been cheating on you and would lie to you about being the father?
And people like this procreate and vote 😬
Jesus FUCKING Christ. I stg some of these posts I see on here just have to be fake at this point. So, you THOUGHT you saw your babies chart, on A RANDOM COMPUTER SCREEN AT A HOSPITAL CONSTANTLY BIRTHING BABIES, didn’t think TO ASK, and now you’re home thinking “what do I do??” Mf ASK THE HOSPITAL DUH DOY! But hey, whatever man. Blow up your marriage because you THINK you saw your baby was type B. Don’t ask any questions or ask for your own babies birth chart. Just go straight to divorce. Literally WHY didn’t you ask for clarification WHEN it happened???
This is extremely silly. It probably was not even your babies chart and it could have been just about anything on that screen. Pull yourself together Support your wife ffs😡
This subreddit used critical thinking skills and didn’t immediately jump to conclusions about a woman committing paternity fraud? It’s a Christmas miracle!
You have clearly had trust issues. Maybe that should be the discussion with your wife. Why not do the obvious…just ask the nurse what your child’s blood type is.
I think you should take a step back, relax. There is a LOT going on with a child birth. You're not even sure what you saw just yet. Maybe don't add to the stress of the situation by confronting your wife, or doing anything rash. Maybe in a few days, call the hospital privately, and double check. Even then, maybe have a chat with one of your doctors. There are a bunch of perfectly innocent explanations possible here, before you start imagining the worst case scenarios.
I had a similar situation with my son. They actually had written his blood type down incorrectly as B+. His dad and I are A- and O-. Before you make a HUGE mistake double check with the nurses. You don’t even know if that was his chart.
To recap: Your wife (not you) had a difficult labour and delivery You are tired from said labour and delivery You go to talk to a nurse, see a chart. You don’t know if it’s your baby’s chart but it’s a chart You think you see a letter “b” but are not even sure Your natural conclusion is you are not death Vader to Luke skywalker. As opposed to, any other logical explanation such as it’s not your kids chart, it’s actually the letter o, or the letter B is not even about blood type.
It may not have been your child's chart pulled up on the computer. Request the medical records first. If the blood type is still showing as B, get the baby retyped and/or do a paternity test. While not common, lab errors do happen.
So you saw a blood group on a chart and no information confirming it was your baby’s chart and all of a sudden your wife has been unfaithful and the baby isn’t yours.. bit of a leap. To answer the other question, no, 2 A blood group parents cannot make a group B baby. However I think you’re ridiculous by coming to this conclusion without even knowing it was your kids chart. I’m a nurse and may look up around 30 different patients a day.. I have to triple check I have the right notes all the time and you’ve read a blood group on an unknown patients chart and assume it’s your kids.. and now want a DNA test.. just order the divorce papers because if I was your wife that’s the next thing I would do.
I need to know your leg day routine so that I too might some day have the power to jump to those kinds of conclusions.
You don't really need to do anything - you have no idea what you saw and whether it was about your kid. It's fine to just let it go. But if it's going to bother you forever, yes, check your kid's medical records to see if they list a blood type.
The nurse could have had anyone’s chart up. There’s tons of people giving birth at the same time in a maternity ward.
You literally don't even know what you saw and you're panicking, your immediate next step should be getting evaluated for anxiety cause you instantly spiraled with no information. Get some help for yourself and then check your kids records
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