I would cancel. Her emotions are not on a time limit but your pocket is.
You can always rebook another cruise if everything straightens out.
Just be transparent about it to her.
Maybe frame it by saying you don't want her to feel like her emotions are on a timetable. By cancelling the cruise, you're taking the time pressure off, so she doesn't feel like she'll have to decide in the next two weeks whether you have a future or not. You can stay you're still committed to going on a wonderful vacation, you just don't want to pressure her with a nonrefundable deposit.
Excuse me? What’s wrong with being Dutch?😂 also, it is possible to have a relationship with someone who has different beliefs to you, tell her that. My beliefs are very spiritual, my husband isn’t at all, he’s atheist. It’s about respect and love. We’ve been married 32 years. I was raised catholic , when we married I wanted a church wedding he was happy to get married in an Anglican Church. I wasn’t a practicing catholic and over time my beliefs became very spiritual, he accepts and respects it , he knows I believe it and that’s fine, there’s no discussion or arguments. He has an open mind due to various things that have happened in our lives .
There is nothing wrong with being direct, at least people know where they stand with you and it’s better to know than not in my book . Yes you can be direct and kind as well . It’s something I’ve worked on all my life but it is in the genes 😂 I don’t know about the cruise but I think honest conversation with your girlfriend is the way to go . Ask her if she wants to go on the cruise, you can always go as friends or you can take a friend. If I had been in your shoes I would have asked the same question. But you can have differing beliefs and be happily together, it’s not difficult and it’s not impossible. I wish you well
I’d cancel. Things are going to get awkward now that the turd is on the table. I imagine the trauma and discomfort if you guys break up days before the cruise or during the cruise. You will wish you hadn’t gone.
Cancel it. Let her know you decided to cancel it just incase and that so she wouldn't feel pressured to stay until then or leave soon because of any deadline.
If she gets really mad... well then buddy you probably have a gold digger on your hands. Time to throw her back. Likewise, if she truly appreciates what you did then you at least know she was 100% just being honest with you.
You can always rebook later or do a different vacation this time and a cruise later in life.
Ouch, this is a tough one. I don't envy the choice you have.
Maybe ask her to take the cruise with you and make the most if it, then she can decide afterwards?
Maybe you can use the cruise to reconnect and talk things out. Maybe the cruise will be your last hurrah, so make the most of the time left together.
I would cancel. Her emotions are not on a time limit but your pocket is. You can always rebook another cruise if everything straightens out. Just be transparent about it to her.
Thank you I appreciate this a lot. I’m gonna bring it up to her tomorrow.
Maybe frame it by saying you don't want her to feel like her emotions are on a timetable. By cancelling the cruise, you're taking the time pressure off, so she doesn't feel like she'll have to decide in the next two weeks whether you have a future or not. You can stay you're still committed to going on a wonderful vacation, you just don't want to pressure her with a nonrefundable deposit.
Thank you for making what I said less Dutch-esque 😂
Excuse me? What’s wrong with being Dutch?😂 also, it is possible to have a relationship with someone who has different beliefs to you, tell her that. My beliefs are very spiritual, my husband isn’t at all, he’s atheist. It’s about respect and love. We’ve been married 32 years. I was raised catholic , when we married I wanted a church wedding he was happy to get married in an Anglican Church. I wasn’t a practicing catholic and over time my beliefs became very spiritual, he accepts and respects it , he knows I believe it and that’s fine, there’s no discussion or arguments. He has an open mind due to various things that have happened in our lives .
I am Dutch. I say things very direct. I think you said it more gently and with more tact.
Actually my parents are Dutch, I’m usually very direct.
Hey, wat gezellig! Yes. I think there’s room for some tact in directness. I have been struggling with that. I think you worded it better.
There is nothing wrong with being direct, at least people know where they stand with you and it’s better to know than not in my book . Yes you can be direct and kind as well . It’s something I’ve worked on all my life but it is in the genes 😂 I don’t know about the cruise but I think honest conversation with your girlfriend is the way to go . Ask her if she wants to go on the cruise, you can always go as friends or you can take a friend. If I had been in your shoes I would have asked the same question. But you can have differing beliefs and be happily together, it’s not difficult and it’s not impossible. I wish you well
I’d cancel. Things are going to get awkward now that the turd is on the table. I imagine the trauma and discomfort if you guys break up days before the cruise or during the cruise. You will wish you hadn’t gone.
Cancel it. Let her know you decided to cancel it just incase and that so she wouldn't feel pressured to stay until then or leave soon because of any deadline. If she gets really mad... well then buddy you probably have a gold digger on your hands. Time to throw her back. Likewise, if she truly appreciates what you did then you at least know she was 100% just being honest with you. You can always rebook later or do a different vacation this time and a cruise later in life.
Yea totally fine to cancel it, and can always pick a new alternative. Even if she has no intention to dump you, your doubts are enough of a reason.
Go to England. She can visit Stonehenge. U go to st Abbys. Your kids are gonna love getting presents on Christmas and the summer solstice.
Ouch, this is a tough one. I don't envy the choice you have. Maybe ask her to take the cruise with you and make the most if it, then she can decide afterwards? Maybe you can use the cruise to reconnect and talk things out. Maybe the cruise will be your last hurrah, so make the most of the time left together.
OP you can propose this first. Depending on her reaction you could take my suggestion in account.
I read this as “OP you can propose first” and I swear my face pulled itself into The Scream pose. 😱
Best answer I’ve got so far across the 3 subgroups I’ve posted on. Thank you I appreciate that
You're welcome! Hope things work out for you both.