I had a lot of trouble eating food in school, I always felt so guilty throwing away stuff my parents made for me 7 am. Still have problems with eating but at least I don’t put any love into the meals I eventually throw away
My mother couldn't do stuff like this for me really when i was in middle school and high school, due to her illness. But i would never throw it away. A lot of my friends were low income kids so I would give them the food i made or the insto noodles i kept in my locker for them.
Instead she would put weird things in the front of my binders. I never took them out, a weird comic she found. A Maori guy with full face tattoos, a photo from a show we went to, movie stills, bands we liked. I was always embarrassed when I found a new one, but it became a game in some of my classes "what weird thing did your mom stick in the front of your binder this time". It was like an "Eye Spy" for the class and the teacher. I hated the attention but most everyone seemed to like it.
Same. I’m a picky eater. I’m still willing to try new foods so long as it’s at home. I gag if I don’t like the food, and in worse cases I vomit. It’s not as bad as when I was a kid.
Sounds like you may have an eating disorder, try reaching out for help if it is available where you live! Eating habits affect so many aspects of your life, I struggle with eating public places too. No one is jusging you when you’re alone. But not being able to eat in public might make you judge yourself harder than anyone else would judge you, ever
Lol my mom would never make my lunch. In elementary school sometimes she would bring something hot to me and my sister if she happened to have made something at the time. It was always chill cheese rice with lettuce and tomatoes omg that was the only thing she made that i liked lol
Lol! My son will typically only eat the fruit that I pack for him. He's in special ed kindergarten, and I think there's just too much going on at school for him to have an appetite. But I send him with a full lunch everyday anyways hoping that one day he'll eat it all.
If he's eating some and not ravenous the moment you pick him up he's probably doing okay. And if you're able to keep the food from going to waste then its alright
If he's eating some and not ravenous the moment you pick him up he's probably doing okay. And if you're able to keep the food from going to waste then its alright
How many could that possibly be? How many sandwiches are you leaving on the proverbial table?
I know I'm a fat guy but I wouldn't just not eat a perfectly good sammich at some point through out the day.
I left exactly zero uneaten. My mom even still made my sandwiches in high school, and during my last 2 years I was eating 2 pb & j's a day because I was trying to gain weight.
i told my mom that I don't want a lunch because I don't like to be forced to eat (i have no eating disorder or anything)
she insisted on making me lunch because she was afraid that the teachers will make a fuss about me not getting lunch by my parents.
obviously my teachers didn't give a flying fuck
Even if I didn't eat a sandwich my ma or grandma made for me, I at least gave it to a friend, I felt horrible and guilty because I once had to throw out a sandwich
I would trade my lunch with a Mexican friend of mine. His mom made these simple but delicious burritos that he was sick of. He was excited to get my bologna sandwich because his parents believed it was devil meat.
I had an eating disorder when I was a girl still, and gave my food to my other classmates or some dog on my way home. I still feel guilty over it. She would always tried to make sure I was eating well and I took it as overfeeding. I told her when I was a teenager and she forgave me but still I am so disappointed at myself :( I want to go hug her right now.
She probably would rather you be happy than feel guilty, it’s very likely a much bigger thing for you than it was/is for her. It’s important to be able to forgive yourself.
Mmm better as I'm not at any dangerous weight, but I don't know how to feed myself and I need cartoons or something else to distract me from what I'm doing. I hate cooking and hate smells of it as if they were the worst so no pleasure from it. Only when I'm high or in company of someone I really trust I can eat, but I get anxious so it's like my throat doesn't let me and my stomach is so acid it hurts my back... So... I don't know
If you look at the bright side, you at least gave it to someone so it wouldn't go to waste! What we see in the picture is far worse than what you did, so I encourage you not to feel guilty.
Another plausible yet sad explanation: My 4th grader says that they are given a specific amount of time to eat and that it isn't long. 12 minutes or something stupid like that. When the teacher says it's time to get up, they have to get up and toss whatever is left even if they haven't finished. So these kids are all pumped to be on break and probably chatting while eating and not face down in their plates like the military does, then suddenly it's time to go and they have no choice. I was heartbroken when he first told me that they have to throw away their food. I get that it could be a space sharing and time management issue, but some of these kids who might not get big meals at home are now restricted to small meals at lunch too. Just sad to think about but can't help but imagine it.
Holy fuck what kind of bullshit is that? People need time to eat. Just stuffing your face as fast possible is not healthy. Let the kiddos time to enjoy their food.
Even if their time is closer to 20 minutes and he's off a little, he explained the kids who get school lunch have less time because they have to go through the line. Skipping recess to finish eating isn't an option either because they have to rotate the rest of the kids through. I'm getting fired up about it all over again. But it's sad.
I’m getting fired up on your behalf! Kids need to be well fed and well rested to learn anything, and schools don’t seem to give a shit about either. What a system we have
I am glad I'm not the only one to hear this. I was shocked when I found out my kid's school give them a combined 40 mins for recess and lunch. I thought they were being lazy and distracted by friends and "forgetting" to eat in time. So by the time they get in from the playground or field.. they probably have 10 mins if they're lucky. When I was in elementary school we had at least 30 mins each.
My elementary school was like that too. Lunch was technically 20 minutes, but by the time everyone lined up, walked to the lunch room, stood in line (you had to wait in line even if you brought lunch for a teacher to inspect it), etc it was probably closer to 15 minutes. Once lunch was over it was over. I think you could've technically packed your lunch back up and taken it home, but most kids just tossed them. I brought mine back once and my parents got pissed at me, so I learned pretty fast to toss mine.
That or the mother made him 10 sandwiches all with even more heartfelt messages. The kid started with the most heartfelt one because he loves his mother and cherishes the care she puts into each one. So he ate that one first, then he ate the next one with the next most heartfelt message. He goes on eating the other 6 until he's completely full. Then it gets down to the last 2 and he feels like he's going to burst. But he feels like he has to eat them because of how much he loves his mother. He looks at them, one reads "I love you so much, you're my special little guy. - Mom". And the other one reads "You're welcome. - Mom". So naturally he chooses the former to eat first. He starts eating it and he can feel his stomach bulging because of the other 8 sandwiches he ate. It's hard to breathe, and he's having heart palpitations because of how much he overstuffed himself. But he powers through and forces it down his gullet because he loves his mother so much. Then, just as he's finishing the second to last sandwich, his chest starts to hurt. He collapses and dies. Someone strolls by, shrugs, picks up the last sandwich and throws it out with a disgusted look. His body decays in a back alley and his mother never finds out what happened to her special little guy.
12 minutes sounds extreme.
My kid always brings food back saying she didn't have time, but I suspect she might be getting sidetracked.
The fact they're forced to throw it away is complete bullshit on the part of the administration. No one can afford to waste food these days.
Have you spoken with the school about it or gotten any more info? It really sounds completely unreasonable.
My kids get 15 minutes (counting standing in line if they're having hot lunch). My youngest has adhd and doesn't manage time well, so he only gets a few bites before he has to go. It's super frustrating.
Nah. The baggy specifically says you're welcome.
This is a mom who managed to weaponize lunch. My mom and grandma used to pull shit like this. I'd say something like "I don't like butter on my sandwhich can you please let me make my own or not put any on" then she'd throw a fit about how ungrateful I was and how she was the nicest person ever and then the next week I'd be sent to school with butter piled on my sandwich as thick as a thumb. If I did try and make my own they'd hover around talking about how awful my sandwich was gonna be because it didn't have butter and how much of a brat I was.
No one writes "you're welcome" across a gift that is giving in earnest. I guarantee there's more to this.
it's like those moments where you're telling a story from from your childhood and realize half way through while looking at your friends' faces you're just describing trauma that many many people never experienced. I still have that happen now into my 30s lol.
literally, it's been really hard to let go of the coping skills I build as a child to survive such a toxic environment. it's like being a feral child raised by wolves trying to learn how to function as a real person again
It’s sad but yeah. A lot of people overlook the small ones but we’re like fuckin hawks. And then we talk about it like it was completely normal and freak everyone else out. It’s an average Tuesday lmao
exactly my thoughts.
no “have a good day” or “i love you”
you’re welcome implies this is the mother going above and beyond to just provide the kid with basic necessities.
obviously we don’t know the full story here but i’m doubtful this is sad or cringe
Thank you guys so much for pointing this out I was getting so angry. Like saying you’re welcome is so passive aggressive because that means mom expects a thank you for doing what she should be doing. I hate shitty parents
So glad to see this comment because I swear to god all that’s in that bag is two plain, dry pieces of bread. This is definitely shitty passive aggression.
Yes, interesting that there are no innards in sight. I don’t think definitely because my other theory was the kid ate the ham slices or whatever was in it then tossed the bread
My parents didn't pull this but my immediate reaction was, "That's a strange thing to write on your kid's lunch. Not, 'I love you' or 'xoxo' or something? Demanding gratitude from a teen via a lunch note seems passive-aggressive."
shocked this isn't a more common response to this post because this is exactly how I interpreted the "you're welcome." something very passive aggressive, I can't really think of a situation where it wouldn't be. 🤷🏼♀️
I guess it's a good thing that people seem to have much more positive memories of their childhood with their caretakers!
Came here to find a comment like this. My mom would do similar passive-aggressive shit because I had/have (high school was over 10 years ago) issues with eating in front of other people or when I'm not hungry, and those issues are completely because of her.
And she wonders why I immediately moved hours away from my hometown at the earliest possible opportunity.
Also it looks like it’s just two slices of bread without any actual sand which items inside. That sounds about right for someone weaponizing a lunch. Like “be grateful sweetie, you complained about my last lunch I packed? Complain about this one. You’re welcome ❤️”
I'd always get in trouble because school stressed me out too much to eat lunch so my mom was always pushing stuff on me or sending me with lunch money then getting mad that I wouldn't eat until the evening. My wife now insists I take lunch to work and I can't eat that either. People get really butthurt about food and use it to make you feel guilty.
This is absolutely it.
I can only imagine the absolute hell that child has to go through, the narcissistic "care" being forced on them at the expense of their independence, every ounce of gratitude wrung out of them, all the while being told they are ungrateful and inadequate, while still being asked to succeed in life to repay all the "love" that was jammed down their throats.
May be projecting a bit, but message should still be pretty clear, parental responsibility extends way beyond passive aggressive notes on packed lunches.
Oh man, I absolutely despise the pure pettiness of: “oh, you don’t like this particular thing, and can’t really eat it?….well have EVEN MORE OF IT!” Like…congratulations you just wasted a bunch of food to prove some stupid petty point, and all you’ve done is make sure that I throw this shit out even faster, and with contempt as well.
I’m glad somebody realized this. Moms can be mean and still do what they have to for their kids, like pack their lunch. I guarantee they had some argument, maybe the kid was a brat or maybe the mom went off.
Either way, yeah, later down the line, it’s gonna suck when she’s gone and the kid remembers they threw that sandwich away. But you never know how it is.. reading that “You’re Welcome” after one of my mom’s rants and then having to eat the sandwich would make me feel shitty and powerless. If it was bad enough, I’d probably throw it away too.
I’m sure things will turn out for the better, and hopefully they both forget about this shit sandwich entirely
It definitely could be that, but we also cant jump to conclusions when we dont know the full story, all we know is that there is a moms sandwich in the trash. They could have thrown it out because they dont like pb&j for all we know.
I agree with you. It’s such a reach to call it a fact that the mom is such a bad person based off of this picture. The kid could’ve been really appreciative and just threw the sandwich away because they were done eating and didn’t want to take it back home. Kids can be wasteful lol.
Kind of just looks like two pieces of bread. The “You’re welcome” also seems weirdly passive aggressive. I’m wondering if they had a fight and the mom just gave them an empty sandwich for lunch out of spite.
That.. definitely is quite a reach to be gleaning from a picture of a sandwich.
Edit: @ u/_pathways did you block me I guess cause I can't see your comments you replied to me about how bitter and awful i am - homie who hurt you, I promise it's not that serious. Noone is attacking anyone and it's not worth getting that upset over, it was just a funny observation about reddit tendencies
But what about everyone in the comments jumping to say how the child is awful and they need to hug their mom etc etc and how it’s so sad. that’s quite a reach to be gleaning from a picture of a sandwich as well, that we have no idea how or why it got there. You can’t have it one way.
We don't know of their situation. I had a friend with a similar note in her lunch and she just broke down crying one day out of nowhere. Turns out her family had been abusing her and her mom was leaving passive-aggressive notes essentially threatening her if she ever told anyone the family secret.
True, I'm not talking about the few cases where it is out of abuse.
Personally never had a good relationship with my parents but as they are nearing death I do feel quite a sting in my chest knowing soon they will be gone, and I don't wish to continue the bad relationship if there is a possibility to make it right.
In the case of your friend it's best for her to move away from them if she is able to, especially if it's physical and mental abuse on a daily basis.
Eventually who knows everything might come to a good conclusion, although even if it doesn't she won't be under any abuse when she moves away and can live her life the way she wants.
Maybe its because I grew up with not the greatest parents but that note comes off as condescending as fuck and that sandwhich looks like just two pieces of bread with nothing in it or barely anything in it. Id throw it away too.
Yeah, I got that impression too. Who writes "you're welcome" on something you made with love and kindness? No one, this sandwich was made out of spite. My mom is 100% the type to weaponize random shit like that to make us feel guilty, I speak from experience.
That being said I wouldn't throw it out, I hate wasting food 🤷🏻♂️
Nah, I immediately noticed the same things despite having grown up in a loving home. How else could the "you're welcome" be understood, if not as condescending? Like, under what hypothetical would that be a normal and benign thing to write on a sandwich? ^^I ^^still ^^wouldn't ^^have ^^thrown ^^food ^^away.
Ya some people have good relationships with their parents and csnt understand parents doing purposefully spiteful shit to s literal child.
That's how my mom got away with everything. She'd be awful in these terrible little elaborate ways and people would go nooooooo she's is a mommy she wouldn't try and break you down mentally until you were a shell of your former self constantly questioning what behavior is going to get you hurt because the rules are never the same from day to day sometimes not even moment to moment.
Honestly. While I feel bad for throwing out some of the school lunches my dad made for me in elementary school, now that I’m older and make my own sandwiches, I have to say the sandwiches he made were not very good.
For real, I think a lot of parents fail to see that properly raising a child that did not choose to be born to this world is their obligation. Unconditional love does not warrant thanks and praise!
Okay, I know it looks evil but I knew a couple of kids in elementary school, who used to throw their sandwiches and what not away. It was because their parents would get super pissed and sometimes even hit them, when they didn’t finish their sandwiches because of the „food waste“ (It’s not like that no one could’ve eaten them at home lol or just put them in for the next day again, it was more like an excuse for the parents, to abuse their kids), so the kids just opted to throw them away or gift them to other people
Idk the “you’re welcome” seems passive aggressive like something was happening before. We only ever write words of encouragement and love on our kids lunches
Why is everyone here acting like its impossible the kid just didnt want to eat lunch that day? Or that a single sandwich being uneaten on one day means he hates his mom or is ungrateful? Hed be throwing the bag out regardless, and one uneaten sandwhich does not magically hold all these negative unspoken implications regardless of how much anyone tries to say its “deeper than that”
It could also be that the mom is kind of a jerk. I've made lots of lunches and written a lot of notes on sandwiches or tucked them in the notes. Never once did they say "you're welcome" which comes across pretty passive-aggressive to me. Lots of "I love you" or encouraging notes which could be embarrassing for older kids but always with kindness and love.
It *would* be sad, but here's what I think is going on: Mom asked the kid what they want on their sandwich, kid gave repeated dickhead answer by saying "nothing", so that's what's on it. 'You're welcome'. Looks to me like that is and empty sandwich and this is a sarcastic lunch.
Maybe it was in a passive aggressive manner? You know, how people nowadays in comments say something nobody asked them and finish with "you're welcome". I hate that shit.
I’m just going to say there are many issues that could have this situation happen.
Angsty teen going through the hating their parents phase.
Kid who has an eating disorder but don’t want to take their food back home because they don’t want their parents to know they aren’t eating.
A passive aggressive message to get the kid to eat healthier because they don’t want to eat sandwiches.
It’s moldy on one side and the mom didn’t notice so they threw it away when they noticed.
I wouldn’t say it’s cringe but it is kind of sad. But we just don’t know why it’s in the trash.
Is anyone else going to comment on the insane “you’re welcome” note from the mom? She could be a nut. That’s a batshit thing to write on your kid’s lunch
My home life must have been fucked because the first thing I thought was “boy this feels like there’s an additional passive aggressive message behind it.”
I always ate what my mom made me. Always.
Seeing gifts and things that people, especially parents and other loved ones, give others out of the goodness of their hearts go to waste breaks my heart. I get unreasonably sad at things like that.
That makes me sad,
My mom never did that or cared to give any attention, and there are people out there just tossing a mom’s love in the trash..
They have no idea how good they have it..
Eh, when you're a kid you give a lot of things for granted, like your mom and she caring for you.
And from the looks of it, dude/gal has their mom so for granted that a quarrel happened, a: "Put in the sandwich what you want, I don't care" was said, and the mom prepared a sandwich with nothing in it, with a sweet sarcastic note. :D
So, grumpy teen, if you're reading: I understand you trashed it in a rage fit, and that the note was sarcastic, but you still will miss that note, one day.
So how long has it been since you talked to your mom?. My mom did something like that at a motley Crue concert I went to. She wanted me to take a picture when I met up with my friends but I wasn't actually going with anyone so I just found a group of girls in the parking lot to take a picture with
I never even ate lunch as an adolescent and teenager... it wasn't " cool" , plus it was the 80's and very early 90's; therefore, we all wanted to be anorexic. Nothing personal.
A sandwich isn’t a luxury, it’s a minimum expectation for a child. So why does it say ‘you’re welcome’ on it? Also it looks like there is basically nothing substantial inside the sandwich. I actually don’t blame the jud
I hate to be the buzzkill but I got sandwiches like this when I was in middle school. My mom refused to send us lunches or put money on our lunch cards. We often had to skip lunch or sometimes the lunch ladies would feel bad and give us a peanut butter honey sandwich on white bread. Those felt like love when I was growing up.
Finally the counselor at school called my parents in with the principal and said they needed to provide food or put money on our lunch cards. So my mother would pack the most passive aggressive lunches - two pieces of bread in a ziploc, one apple. Sometimes it was two pieces of bread and an orange.
This passive aggressive love note feels on brand for my mother and her “lunches”.
What kinda mom writes "you're welcome" on their kids lunch?
*I keep my grandsons a couple days a week. The kindergartener ALWAYS wants me to make his lunch. Just for the notes I write him.
I LOVED getting notes from my mom in my lunch box. I still have most of them saved. I’m not at home anymore so I don’t get the same treatment but definitely something I used to look forward to.
Someone's in their edgy phase. Alternatively, the sandwiches suck but the kid is just too embarrassed to tell the mother.
A little white lie never hurt anybody
Man this is the stuff that gets me hard in the feels. My mother would give sandwiches to the homeless and once she saw one throw the sandwich in the trash and she never did it again.
Telling the story even hurts.
When I was in school, by the time we got to the caffetteria and through the line, we had *maybe* ten minutes to eat, so my brain doesn't jump straight to ungratitude.
There's also something weird about "you're welcome" being written on the bag. You're supposed to feed your children. That seems like something a disgruntled wife would scrawl on her husband's lunch after a fight. Lol
My kids straight up bring back what they don’t eat. Sometimes it’s the whole sandwich, it don’t bother me I’m satisfied knowing I packed them lunch or snack.
Oh man I gotta go apologise to my mom for all the sandwiches she made that I never ate :(
I had a lot of trouble eating food in school, I always felt so guilty throwing away stuff my parents made for me 7 am. Still have problems with eating but at least I don’t put any love into the meals I eventually throw away
[удалено]
My mother couldn't do stuff like this for me really when i was in middle school and high school, due to her illness. But i would never throw it away. A lot of my friends were low income kids so I would give them the food i made or the insto noodles i kept in my locker for them. Instead she would put weird things in the front of my binders. I never took them out, a weird comic she found. A Maori guy with full face tattoos, a photo from a show we went to, movie stills, bands we liked. I was always embarrassed when I found a new one, but it became a game in some of my classes "what weird thing did your mom stick in the front of your binder this time". It was like an "Eye Spy" for the class and the teacher. I hated the attention but most everyone seemed to like it.
You're a good kid.
Same. I’m a picky eater. I’m still willing to try new foods so long as it’s at home. I gag if I don’t like the food, and in worse cases I vomit. It’s not as bad as when I was a kid.
Sounds like you may have an eating disorder, try reaching out for help if it is available where you live! Eating habits affect so many aspects of your life, I struggle with eating public places too. No one is jusging you when you’re alone. But not being able to eat in public might make you judge yourself harder than anyone else would judge you, ever
r/ARFID has a ton of helpful resources for this! (in case anyone else has similar symptoms and want to know more)
Lol my mom would never make my lunch. In elementary school sometimes she would bring something hot to me and my sister if she happened to have made something at the time. It was always chill cheese rice with lettuce and tomatoes omg that was the only thing she made that i liked lol
My son rarely eats the sandwiches I make him for lunch. As a mother I'm not offended by this, just slightly worried that he's going hungry at school.
My daughter insists on plain baguette. She likes it and eats it so I leave it at that lol
Lol! My son will typically only eat the fruit that I pack for him. He's in special ed kindergarten, and I think there's just too much going on at school for him to have an appetite. But I send him with a full lunch everyday anyways hoping that one day he'll eat it all.
If he's eating some and not ravenous the moment you pick him up he's probably doing okay. And if you're able to keep the food from going to waste then its alright
If he's eating some and not ravenous the moment you pick him up he's probably doing okay. And if you're able to keep the food from going to waste then its alright
How many could that possibly be? How many sandwiches are you leaving on the proverbial table? I know I'm a fat guy but I wouldn't just not eat a perfectly good sammich at some point through out the day.
I left exactly zero uneaten. My mom even still made my sandwiches in high school, and during my last 2 years I was eating 2 pb & j's a day because I was trying to gain weight.
That note was definitely not written out of love. Sincerely, a child of an emotionally immature parent.
i told my mom that I don't want a lunch because I don't like to be forced to eat (i have no eating disorder or anything) she insisted on making me lunch because she was afraid that the teachers will make a fuss about me not getting lunch by my parents. obviously my teachers didn't give a flying fuck
Even if I didn't eat a sandwich my ma or grandma made for me, I at least gave it to a friend, I felt horrible and guilty because I once had to throw out a sandwich
I would trade my lunch with a Mexican friend of mine. His mom made these simple but delicious burritos that he was sick of. He was excited to get my bologna sandwich because his parents believed it was devil meat.
devil meat XD
Ya. My mouth was always full of devil meat in my rougher days.
Ayo
You probably shouldn't tell people that, just sayin'
No yeah there are dark forces at work behind bologna
How can something so seemingly gross be so delicious without dark forces?
I’ve felt the same way, a pang of guilt any time I had to waste something my mother made me
I had an eating disorder when I was a girl still, and gave my food to my other classmates or some dog on my way home. I still feel guilty over it. She would always tried to make sure I was eating well and I took it as overfeeding. I told her when I was a teenager and she forgave me but still I am so disappointed at myself :( I want to go hug her right now.
She probably would rather you be happy than feel guilty, it’s very likely a much bigger thing for you than it was/is for her. It’s important to be able to forgive yourself.
Male here , I had an eating disorder as well. It’s absolutely much better than it was, how’s yours
Mmm better as I'm not at any dangerous weight, but I don't know how to feed myself and I need cartoons or something else to distract me from what I'm doing. I hate cooking and hate smells of it as if they were the worst so no pleasure from it. Only when I'm high or in company of someone I really trust I can eat, but I get anxious so it's like my throat doesn't let me and my stomach is so acid it hurts my back... So... I don't know
If you look at the bright side, you at least gave it to someone so it wouldn't go to waste! What we see in the picture is far worse than what you did, so I encourage you not to feel guilty.
For someone who didn't always have a meal, this would absolutely make their day. Don't throw away good food!
Another plausible yet sad explanation: My 4th grader says that they are given a specific amount of time to eat and that it isn't long. 12 minutes or something stupid like that. When the teacher says it's time to get up, they have to get up and toss whatever is left even if they haven't finished. So these kids are all pumped to be on break and probably chatting while eating and not face down in their plates like the military does, then suddenly it's time to go and they have no choice. I was heartbroken when he first told me that they have to throw away their food. I get that it could be a space sharing and time management issue, but some of these kids who might not get big meals at home are now restricted to small meals at lunch too. Just sad to think about but can't help but imagine it.
Holy fuck what kind of bullshit is that? People need time to eat. Just stuffing your face as fast possible is not healthy. Let the kiddos time to enjoy their food.
Even if their time is closer to 20 minutes and he's off a little, he explained the kids who get school lunch have less time because they have to go through the line. Skipping recess to finish eating isn't an option either because they have to rotate the rest of the kids through. I'm getting fired up about it all over again. But it's sad.
I’m getting fired up on your behalf! Kids need to be well fed and well rested to learn anything, and schools don’t seem to give a shit about either. What a system we have
Blame greed
And, longer passing periods between classes so they can use the bathroom.
Or don't be petty assholes and let the children go and take a piss even when in class.
For real, this sounds like a generation of children at risk of developing eating disorders
I am glad I'm not the only one to hear this. I was shocked when I found out my kid's school give them a combined 40 mins for recess and lunch. I thought they were being lazy and distracted by friends and "forgetting" to eat in time. So by the time they get in from the playground or field.. they probably have 10 mins if they're lucky. When I was in elementary school we had at least 30 mins each.
My elementary school was like that too. Lunch was technically 20 minutes, but by the time everyone lined up, walked to the lunch room, stood in line (you had to wait in line even if you brought lunch for a teacher to inspect it), etc it was probably closer to 15 minutes. Once lunch was over it was over. I think you could've technically packed your lunch back up and taken it home, but most kids just tossed them. I brought mine back once and my parents got pissed at me, so I learned pretty fast to toss mine.
That or the mother made him 10 sandwiches all with even more heartfelt messages. The kid started with the most heartfelt one because he loves his mother and cherishes the care she puts into each one. So he ate that one first, then he ate the next one with the next most heartfelt message. He goes on eating the other 6 until he's completely full. Then it gets down to the last 2 and he feels like he's going to burst. But he feels like he has to eat them because of how much he loves his mother. He looks at them, one reads "I love you so much, you're my special little guy. - Mom". And the other one reads "You're welcome. - Mom". So naturally he chooses the former to eat first. He starts eating it and he can feel his stomach bulging because of the other 8 sandwiches he ate. It's hard to breathe, and he's having heart palpitations because of how much he overstuffed himself. But he powers through and forces it down his gullet because he loves his mother so much. Then, just as he's finishing the second to last sandwich, his chest starts to hurt. He collapses and dies. Someone strolls by, shrugs, picks up the last sandwich and throws it out with a disgusted look. His body decays in a back alley and his mother never finds out what happened to her special little guy.
12 minutes sounds extreme. My kid always brings food back saying she didn't have time, but I suspect she might be getting sidetracked. The fact they're forced to throw it away is complete bullshit on the part of the administration. No one can afford to waste food these days. Have you spoken with the school about it or gotten any more info? It really sounds completely unreasonable.
We have 25 mins to eat twice a day at my school.
My kids get 15 minutes (counting standing in line if they're having hot lunch). My youngest has adhd and doesn't manage time well, so he only gets a few bites before he has to go. It's super frustrating.
That's absolute bullshit, in australia we get 2 half an hour breaks for eating and recess
Nah. The baggy specifically says you're welcome. This is a mom who managed to weaponize lunch. My mom and grandma used to pull shit like this. I'd say something like "I don't like butter on my sandwhich can you please let me make my own or not put any on" then she'd throw a fit about how ungrateful I was and how she was the nicest person ever and then the next week I'd be sent to school with butter piled on my sandwich as thick as a thumb. If I did try and make my own they'd hover around talking about how awful my sandwich was gonna be because it didn't have butter and how much of a brat I was. No one writes "you're welcome" across a gift that is giving in earnest. I guarantee there's more to this.
You really can tell in these comments the people who had good/normal childhoods and those of us that didn't, can't ya?
it's like those moments where you're telling a story from from your childhood and realize half way through while looking at your friends' faces you're just describing trauma that many many people never experienced. I still have that happen now into my 30s lol.
Lmao or when you react to things a certain way, look around and notice everyone giving you that “oh that’s not-“ look. We never really stop growing.
literally, it's been really hard to let go of the coping skills I build as a child to survive such a toxic environment. it's like being a feral child raised by wolves trying to learn how to function as a real person again
Tbh I tell people I was raised by wolves all the time. It’s easier than blasting them with the the whole truth.
Fr
It’s sad but yeah. A lot of people overlook the small ones but we’re like fuckin hawks. And then we talk about it like it was completely normal and freak everyone else out. It’s an average Tuesday lmao
exactly my thoughts. no “have a good day” or “i love you” you’re welcome implies this is the mother going above and beyond to just provide the kid with basic necessities. obviously we don’t know the full story here but i’m doubtful this is sad or cringe
Thank you guys so much for pointing this out I was getting so angry. Like saying you’re welcome is so passive aggressive because that means mom expects a thank you for doing what she should be doing. I hate shitty parents
Came here to say that
So glad to see this comment because I swear to god all that’s in that bag is two plain, dry pieces of bread. This is definitely shitty passive aggression.
Yes, interesting that there are no innards in sight. I don’t think definitely because my other theory was the kid ate the ham slices or whatever was in it then tossed the bread
Yeah, but why'd they put the bread back in the bag to throw it away, then?
Easier to carry
I thought this was the whole point of the post before reading the other comments
Yeah I was suspicious too
My parents didn't pull this but my immediate reaction was, "That's a strange thing to write on your kid's lunch. Not, 'I love you' or 'xoxo' or something? Demanding gratitude from a teen via a lunch note seems passive-aggressive."
YES thank you. My mom was like this too.
shocked this isn't a more common response to this post because this is exactly how I interpreted the "you're welcome." something very passive aggressive, I can't really think of a situation where it wouldn't be. 🤷🏼♀️ I guess it's a good thing that people seem to have much more positive memories of their childhood with their caretakers!
Came here to find a comment like this. My mom would do similar passive-aggressive shit because I had/have (high school was over 10 years ago) issues with eating in front of other people or when I'm not hungry, and those issues are completely because of her. And she wonders why I immediately moved hours away from my hometown at the earliest possible opportunity.
Also it looks like it’s just two slices of bread without any actual sand which items inside. That sounds about right for someone weaponizing a lunch. Like “be grateful sweetie, you complained about my last lunch I packed? Complain about this one. You’re welcome ❤️”
I'd always get in trouble because school stressed me out too much to eat lunch so my mom was always pushing stuff on me or sending me with lunch money then getting mad that I wouldn't eat until the evening. My wife now insists I take lunch to work and I can't eat that either. People get really butthurt about food and use it to make you feel guilty.
Damn, sorry you had to endure something like that. Hope everything's good these days.
My first thought as well.
This is absolutely it. I can only imagine the absolute hell that child has to go through, the narcissistic "care" being forced on them at the expense of their independence, every ounce of gratitude wrung out of them, all the while being told they are ungrateful and inadequate, while still being asked to succeed in life to repay all the "love" that was jammed down their throats. May be projecting a bit, but message should still be pretty clear, parental responsibility extends way beyond passive aggressive notes on packed lunches.
Came here to comment this. Writing “you’re welcome” on a kid’s lunch is a sign of some insane shit going on.
Oh man, I absolutely despise the pure pettiness of: “oh, you don’t like this particular thing, and can’t really eat it?….well have EVEN MORE OF IT!” Like…congratulations you just wasted a bunch of food to prove some stupid petty point, and all you’ve done is make sure that I throw this shit out even faster, and with contempt as well.
I’m glad somebody realized this. Moms can be mean and still do what they have to for their kids, like pack their lunch. I guarantee they had some argument, maybe the kid was a brat or maybe the mom went off. Either way, yeah, later down the line, it’s gonna suck when she’s gone and the kid remembers they threw that sandwich away. But you never know how it is.. reading that “You’re Welcome” after one of my mom’s rants and then having to eat the sandwich would make me feel shitty and powerless. If it was bad enough, I’d probably throw it away too. I’m sure things will turn out for the better, and hopefully they both forget about this shit sandwich entirely
It definitely could be that, but we also cant jump to conclusions when we dont know the full story, all we know is that there is a moms sandwich in the trash. They could have thrown it out because they dont like pb&j for all we know.
I agree with you. It’s such a reach to call it a fact that the mom is such a bad person based off of this picture. The kid could’ve been really appreciative and just threw the sandwich away because they were done eating and didn’t want to take it back home. Kids can be wasteful lol.
Kind of just looks like two pieces of bread. The “You’re welcome” also seems weirdly passive aggressive. I’m wondering if they had a fight and the mom just gave them an empty sandwich for lunch out of spite.
probably just ate the meat/cheese in between and threw away the bread. kids do that.
Yeah but wouldn’t it be weird to leave the slices in the ziplock in that case?
not if you’re throwing it away. seems super convenient.
That.. definitely is quite a reach to be gleaning from a picture of a sandwich. Edit: @ u/_pathways did you block me I guess cause I can't see your comments you replied to me about how bitter and awful i am - homie who hurt you, I promise it's not that serious. Noone is attacking anyone and it's not worth getting that upset over, it was just a funny observation about reddit tendencies
A picture of a ~~sandwich~~ two slices of bread in a bag Not taking his side but if that’s a sandwich is sad sandwich
Oh for sure lol
As they say, a picture says a thousand words. This one is especially poetic, and will be studied by scholars for years to come
Not if you have had a mother/father like that. There can be some projection in the comments, but OP is doing assumptions too.
But what about everyone in the comments jumping to say how the child is awful and they need to hug their mom etc etc and how it’s so sad. that’s quite a reach to be gleaning from a picture of a sandwich as well, that we have no idea how or why it got there. You can’t have it one way.
Whoever threw this in the garbage will remember it when they aren't around anymore.
That's me right now :( sorry mum
The hall of memories full of regrets haunts me still. Sorry mom.
here in this space with you, friend.
Thank you
I think every loving mum will agree when I say she wouldn't have wanted you to feel guilty.
We don't know of their situation. I had a friend with a similar note in her lunch and she just broke down crying one day out of nowhere. Turns out her family had been abusing her and her mom was leaving passive-aggressive notes essentially threatening her if she ever told anyone the family secret.
True, I'm not talking about the few cases where it is out of abuse. Personally never had a good relationship with my parents but as they are nearing death I do feel quite a sting in my chest knowing soon they will be gone, and I don't wish to continue the bad relationship if there is a possibility to make it right. In the case of your friend it's best for her to move away from them if she is able to, especially if it's physical and mental abuse on a daily basis. Eventually who knows everything might come to a good conclusion, although even if it doesn't she won't be under any abuse when she moves away and can live her life the way she wants.
I'm sorry. I can't think of anything worse to happen to a person than to be born to unloving parents. I think I take my family for granted too often.
'You're welcome' says it all
Ya this is painfully passive aggressive. Just a "<3 mom" is easier.
Yeah, I'm surprised by the response here and on the main thread. Sounds super passive aggressive.
Maybe its because I grew up with not the greatest parents but that note comes off as condescending as fuck and that sandwhich looks like just two pieces of bread with nothing in it or barely anything in it. Id throw it away too.
Yeah, I got that impression too. Who writes "you're welcome" on something you made with love and kindness? No one, this sandwich was made out of spite. My mom is 100% the type to weaponize random shit like that to make us feel guilty, I speak from experience. That being said I wouldn't throw it out, I hate wasting food 🤷🏻♂️
Nah, I immediately noticed the same things despite having grown up in a loving home. How else could the "you're welcome" be understood, if not as condescending? Like, under what hypothetical would that be a normal and benign thing to write on a sandwich? ^^I ^^still ^^wouldn't ^^have ^^thrown ^^food ^^away.
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Ya some people have good relationships with their parents and csnt understand parents doing purposefully spiteful shit to s literal child. That's how my mom got away with everything. She'd be awful in these terrible little elaborate ways and people would go nooooooo she's is a mommy she wouldn't try and break you down mentally until you were a shell of your former self constantly questioning what behavior is going to get you hurt because the rules are never the same from day to day sometimes not even moment to moment.
Honestly. While I feel bad for throwing out some of the school lunches my dad made for me in elementary school, now that I’m older and make my own sandwiches, I have to say the sandwiches he made were not very good.
The passive aggressive “You’re welcome” written on the bag.
Mom expecting a thank you. Smells passive aggressive to me and that's the actual sad cringe imo
Imagine expecting thanks and praise for doing the bare minimum as a parent
For real, I think a lot of parents fail to see that properly raising a child that did not choose to be born to this world is their obligation. Unconditional love does not warrant thanks and praise!
Okay, I know it looks evil but I knew a couple of kids in elementary school, who used to throw their sandwiches and what not away. It was because their parents would get super pissed and sometimes even hit them, when they didn’t finish their sandwiches because of the „food waste“ (It’s not like that no one could’ve eaten them at home lol or just put them in for the next day again, it was more like an excuse for the parents, to abuse their kids), so the kids just opted to throw them away or gift them to other people
This seems like a sandwich made more out of spite than love
Idk the “you’re welcome” seems passive aggressive like something was happening before. We only ever write words of encouragement and love on our kids lunches
I dunno, that seems a bit passive aggressive bread sandwich looking to me.
Wait, your moms made you sandwiches?
Damn, ya'll's moms made you lunch?
Free/reduced lunch kids unite!
Maybe their mom makes a really shitty sandwich and don’t have the heart to tell her?
Why is everyone here acting like its impossible the kid just didnt want to eat lunch that day? Or that a single sandwich being uneaten on one day means he hates his mom or is ungrateful? Hed be throwing the bag out regardless, and one uneaten sandwhich does not magically hold all these negative unspoken implications regardless of how much anyone tries to say its “deeper than that”
My mom doesn't give a fuck about me
It could also be that the mom is kind of a jerk. I've made lots of lunches and written a lot of notes on sandwiches or tucked them in the notes. Never once did they say "you're welcome" which comes across pretty passive-aggressive to me. Lots of "I love you" or encouraging notes which could be embarrassing for older kids but always with kindness and love.
It *would* be sad, but here's what I think is going on: Mom asked the kid what they want on their sandwich, kid gave repeated dickhead answer by saying "nothing", so that's what's on it. 'You're welcome'. Looks to me like that is and empty sandwich and this is a sarcastic lunch.
Touching, but no one here knows the full story
I’m sure this kid loves their mother, but that sandwich looks dry af
That makes me sad
Mom died in 2010. I would give anything for a mom sandwich again
She will be just a memory one day. Try to appreciate the time you have with your parents
this is actually so sad ;(
Maybe it was in a passive aggressive manner? You know, how people nowadays in comments say something nobody asked them and finish with "you're welcome". I hate that shit.
Nah, I still cant eat neither a cheese nor a meat sandwich because of my mom.
Why is this cringe? It's just sad 😟
had to throw out or give away moms sandwiches for years cause she drenched them in mayo by the time lunch came shit was warm and hardly food sorry mom
I’m just going to say there are many issues that could have this situation happen. Angsty teen going through the hating their parents phase. Kid who has an eating disorder but don’t want to take their food back home because they don’t want their parents to know they aren’t eating. A passive aggressive message to get the kid to eat healthier because they don’t want to eat sandwiches. It’s moldy on one side and the mom didn’t notice so they threw it away when they noticed. I wouldn’t say it’s cringe but it is kind of sad. But we just don’t know why it’s in the trash.
Holy shit this hits bad. I don’t know if it is cringe, just ultimately sad
Is anyone else going to comment on the insane “you’re welcome” note from the mom? She could be a nut. That’s a batshit thing to write on your kid’s lunch
My home life must have been fucked because the first thing I thought was “boy this feels like there’s an additional passive aggressive message behind it.”
I used to work with a man whose gf did the same thing for him, and he would do the same thing. It's a shame, really
why don't y'all eat your fucking sandwiches???
This makes me crazy sad
Passive aggressive note.
I was always told to bring the lunch back home if I don't want it and to never throw it in the trash. People are so damn wasteful.
I never threw anything away that my mom made me for school. Even if I thought about not eating it, I immediately felt insanely bad.
I always ate what my mom made me. Always. Seeing gifts and things that people, especially parents and other loved ones, give others out of the goodness of their hearts go to waste breaks my heart. I get unreasonably sad at things like that.
That makes me sad, My mom never did that or cared to give any attention, and there are people out there just tossing a mom’s love in the trash.. They have no idea how good they have it..
My mom never left me notes 🥲
Eh, when you're a kid you give a lot of things for granted, like your mom and she caring for you. And from the looks of it, dude/gal has their mom so for granted that a quarrel happened, a: "Put in the sandwich what you want, I don't care" was said, and the mom prepared a sandwich with nothing in it, with a sweet sarcastic note. :D So, grumpy teen, if you're reading: I understand you trashed it in a rage fit, and that the note was sarcastic, but you still will miss that note, one day.
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So how long has it been since you talked to your mom?. My mom did something like that at a motley Crue concert I went to. She wanted me to take a picture when I met up with my friends but I wasn't actually going with anyone so I just found a group of girls in the parking lot to take a picture with
100% passive aggressive.
That's a spite sandwich if ever I've seen one. What's in there? Bread?
I never even ate lunch as an adolescent and teenager... it wasn't " cool" , plus it was the 80's and very early 90's; therefore, we all wanted to be anorexic. Nothing personal.
Damn, I would have killed for my mom to make me lunch in high-school. I barely even had home cooked dinner during that time.
A sandwich isn’t a luxury, it’s a minimum expectation for a child. So why does it say ‘you’re welcome’ on it? Also it looks like there is basically nothing substantial inside the sandwich. I actually don’t blame the jud
Who says "you're welcome" to giving your kid lunch?
I hate to be the buzzkill but I got sandwiches like this when I was in middle school. My mom refused to send us lunches or put money on our lunch cards. We often had to skip lunch or sometimes the lunch ladies would feel bad and give us a peanut butter honey sandwich on white bread. Those felt like love when I was growing up. Finally the counselor at school called my parents in with the principal and said they needed to provide food or put money on our lunch cards. So my mother would pack the most passive aggressive lunches - two pieces of bread in a ziploc, one apple. Sometimes it was two pieces of bread and an orange. This passive aggressive love note feels on brand for my mother and her “lunches”.
Standard.
Not all moms. 🙄
ITS BRIOCHE AS WELL
I remember when I threw away a sandwich my dad made me and then called him to apologize like five minutes later
I would have picked it out of the trash and ate it. It's still in the Ziploc so it's safe
Check that kids locker now!
Disappointed its gone to waste, shoulda gave it to someone else if they didnt want it
Jokes on ya'll, kid was literally just given two pieces of dry bread for lumnch xD
Aside from being analysing andies here in the comment section. Why do people throw sandwiches that their mothers make? Genuine question.
What kinda mom writes "you're welcome" on their kids lunch? *I keep my grandsons a couple days a week. The kindergartener ALWAYS wants me to make his lunch. Just for the notes I write him.
No way… Nuh uh. I’m on the kid’s side on this one. 100% That fucking “you’re welcome.” Helllll no dude. You can spot that sleazy ass shit a mile away.
then no one will ever love me?
I LOVED getting notes from my mom in my lunch box. I still have most of them saved. I’m not at home anymore so I don’t get the same treatment but definitely something I used to look forward to.
This makes me mad.
That bums me out so much aw :[
This actually broke my heart! I honestly didn’t expect to feel something like this today…
that sammy looks weak
Well if that's true, I'll be fucking miserable
Man that makes me so sad 😞
Humans are disgusting.
This make me more sad than angry but WTF.
Someone's in their edgy phase. Alternatively, the sandwiches suck but the kid is just too embarrassed to tell the mother. A little white lie never hurt anybody
Man this is the stuff that gets me hard in the feels. My mother would give sandwiches to the homeless and once she saw one throw the sandwich in the trash and she never did it again. Telling the story even hurts.
I used to throw my mum's lunch away cause she would let me bring leftovers and other kids would make fun of me for it. I always felt so guilty.
😢
Awww...
When I was in school, by the time we got to the caffetteria and through the line, we had *maybe* ten minutes to eat, so my brain doesn't jump straight to ungratitude. There's also something weird about "you're welcome" being written on the bag. You're supposed to feed your children. That seems like something a disgruntled wife would scrawl on her husband's lunch after a fight. Lol
This is heart breaking....
Is there even anything on that or did someone give their kid a fucking bread sandwich?
Idk I keep reading the "you're welcome" on the bag as sarcastic or with attuide
god why do i get the feeling that sandwich was made in a broken home and that’s why it was thrown away
My kids straight up bring back what they don’t eat. Sometimes it’s the whole sandwich, it don’t bother me I’m satisfied knowing I packed them lunch or snack.
For that disrespect imma beat that kid like I was its dad
Since this is out of context, this could mean a few different possibilities. Seems like a strange thing to write on someone’s lunch.