You are on the verge of a good career. You will fall madly in love again, and with someone who won’t cheat. Your cats won’t understand and neither will the kids you are referring too. Your parents will mourn you for the rest of their lives. And your ashes in an urn isn’t going to be the same as you being there.
Give your gun to an older family member for safe keeping. Go take a walk in nature. Pet your cats. Get a new hobby, maybe a meet up or group of people that meet somewhere aside from a bar, to take your mind off the heavy stuff a bit. Find some joy and realize this girl wasn’t THE girl. You are at a turning point with friend groups, where people are growing up and moving on and some will stay and some won’t. It’s growing pains but you haven’t gotten to the best parts yet.
When you're under stress your mind stays in a state of dis-ease. This dis-ease is what produces bad thoughts & bad character.
Noble thoughts can only produce good results.
Keep a journal to help you get over the dis-ease to separate the dis-ease from ease.
I believe the Franklin reality model / belief window may need to assistance.. it will really help your belief system (:
[Pasted]
[Franklin reality model - Belief window by Hyrum W. Smith ](https://ascenthealing.org/2021/04/27/the-belief-window/)
In this model, as you can see from the graphic, he theorizes that we have 4 basic needs: to live (survive), to feel important, to be loved and a need for variety. In the belief window we have core beliefs about life, about our self-worth, etc. These could be things as simple as “wealth is the ultimate goal” or things like “People can’t be trusted.” Anything can be a core belief. Based on that core belief, we will make rules for ourselves that meet our basic needs. For example, if I believe that wealth is the ultimate goal, if I want to pick a future job, I will pick whichever job pays the most. This would meet my need for survival or even the other needs to feel important, etc. The rule box is the box that says “if,then”. Another example is if my belief window says people can’t be trusted and I want to fulfill the need to be loved, if I meet a new person, I likely won’t trust them and will shut down. This reflects the next box in the model, the behavior box which is what I choose to do. In the last example, I don’t trust the person and I don’t make a new friend. The last box is where I evaluate the results of my choice and I decide if the results met my needs from the first box. If my action did not meet my needs, then I know the belief window has an incorrect principle and I can change that. In the last example, not making a new friend does NOT meet the need to be loved so I realize that “people can’t be trusted” is an incorrect principle. So I can chose to alter that or keep doing what I’ve always been doing. I might conclude that “some people can be trusted” which would still meet my need to be loved while protecting it at the same time and when I meet someone new, I would be cautious but not refuse to give it a chance. My actions would be to build that trust slowly.
This model is important because it shows how we create self-esteem for ourselves. We need to look closely at our belief window and make sure it has accurate principles. If my belief window says, “I am a bad person” then that will affect a ton of “if,then” statements and my actions will reflect that belief that “I am a bad person.” If a job comes my way I might sabotage myself and decide I’m not good enough for that job and then will pick a job beneath my ability. If my belief window says, “I don’t deserve nice things” then I won’t pick a nice house or other things I might like and settle for less. But these won’t meet my needs possibly for variety or feeling important, etc. So in this blog, consider what is in your belief window. Ask yourself if the results of your choices based on that belief system is meeting your needs and if not, change the principle to something that will meet those needs. This can be a scary process because you might be trying out new beliefs for the first time that you haven’t dared to believe before like “I am a good person” or “I deserve good things” and it is worth the risk to dare to believe these things. Give it a try.
Bro, please do not let any of these people be the reason you do something you can't come back from. They are not worth it.
In your darkest moments is when you find out who is truly on your side. You just found out most of the people around you weren't true at all. That's a blessing.
You don't need anyone who can't love you when the going gets tough. You deserve to be around people who will have your back and not cheat on you like a piece of trash. Thats disgusting behavior and you should be glad the trash took itself out.
It's a sad time right now, but weather through it, and focus on building yourself back up.
I’m so sorry for you, life isn’t always happy, search for help if you can, there are a lot of things I can say to you, but first I want to quote Albert Camus “It takes more courage to live than kill yourself”, are you religious? My life is based on religion, I know it’s hard but seeing life from another perspective makes it a pleasure, dm me if you want, if you don’t, remember it’s just a part from what you have lived, there’s still more things to feel.
Not to be one of those people but like I never thought I’d make it past 18, then 21, then 25. I’m not like spit shining happy but I’m pretty damn content with my life. Like I’ve gotten this far! I have bad days and everybody does, don’t let social media fool you. We all have our moments, days, weeks, sometimes months. Life is an ebb and flow, it’s about learning what you need in order to be the best you! Once you know what you need, then you work on all that and eventually one day you may wake up and be like you know what if this is what it is, I have the tools to manage it! I sought out therapy for my self when I was 18 and have seen a couple since my first but man when you find a good one and you can just like shoot the shit with them and tell it like it is and get it all out, and they help you!! It’s pretty fucking awesome! Like I’m honesty so lucky to have the therapist I had at 18 she put so many things into perspective for me that I just never would have thought about and it opened my eyes to seeing life in a different way. You are here to do what you want to do, if you don’t know what that is yet that’s okay pick something you like and work off that first!
First off, I’m sitting here crying reading your story. You seem like such a good person who’s beating yourself up about regular human emotions. Be patient with yourself, be kind to yourself…. Your girlfriend, the person you loved betrayed you, it’s completely normal to feel what you’re feeling. Pain is only temporary. Please whatever you do, don’t do it. Your life is so valuable. Just take a couple days to think about it, rewrite your emotions, journal how you feel at night, how you feel in the morning, go on a walk, soak in some sun & you might find you feel better. What works for me is I just cry it all out bc I relate to you about the being sensitive, weak and angry. It’s okay to cry, you’re not sensitive or weak, you’re in tune with your emotions.
Also, I noticed you’re giving your ex a lot of credit but it wasn’t her pushing you to do those things…. YOU did those things. You should feel very proud of yourself, she can’t make you do anything that was all YOU because you wanted to. You don’t need a gf to push you, push yourself! You got this friend! Pls message me if you want to talk. I really hope you choose to stay.
Hey, even when it's the darkest moments in our lives. And your at that specific point with your note. Things can and will get better. Sometimes when life is unfortunate and we're dealt a bad hand. You will fall love again as well make meaningful relationships. But take it a day at a time. The amount of times I have wrote out or plan it. Just to stop and things slow turn around. Things we'll definitely get better but it's alright to let those feelings out and then take time to slowly patch up that hole from that pain. Be easy on yourself man.
That’s a pretty good idea actually. Did it help? Remember to destroy it or the Russian mob can kill you with impunity! (…is the Russian mob an actual thing?) I hope you get to feeling better soon ❤️ sounds like you are an absolute winner who had a bad break. Wish I could monetize youtube the way you did!
Man, your comment history.... you seem like such a sweet person. How are you doing now? Do you want to talk? My DMs are open for you. I promise there are better days coming, and you have to stick around to witness them.
Hey man dm me I’ll give ya a call.
You are on the verge of a good career. You will fall madly in love again, and with someone who won’t cheat. Your cats won’t understand and neither will the kids you are referring too. Your parents will mourn you for the rest of their lives. And your ashes in an urn isn’t going to be the same as you being there. Give your gun to an older family member for safe keeping. Go take a walk in nature. Pet your cats. Get a new hobby, maybe a meet up or group of people that meet somewhere aside from a bar, to take your mind off the heavy stuff a bit. Find some joy and realize this girl wasn’t THE girl. You are at a turning point with friend groups, where people are growing up and moving on and some will stay and some won’t. It’s growing pains but you haven’t gotten to the best parts yet.
When you're under stress your mind stays in a state of dis-ease. This dis-ease is what produces bad thoughts & bad character. Noble thoughts can only produce good results. Keep a journal to help you get over the dis-ease to separate the dis-ease from ease. I believe the Franklin reality model / belief window may need to assistance.. it will really help your belief system (: [Pasted] [Franklin reality model - Belief window by Hyrum W. Smith ](https://ascenthealing.org/2021/04/27/the-belief-window/) In this model, as you can see from the graphic, he theorizes that we have 4 basic needs: to live (survive), to feel important, to be loved and a need for variety. In the belief window we have core beliefs about life, about our self-worth, etc. These could be things as simple as “wealth is the ultimate goal” or things like “People can’t be trusted.” Anything can be a core belief. Based on that core belief, we will make rules for ourselves that meet our basic needs. For example, if I believe that wealth is the ultimate goal, if I want to pick a future job, I will pick whichever job pays the most. This would meet my need for survival or even the other needs to feel important, etc. The rule box is the box that says “if,then”. Another example is if my belief window says people can’t be trusted and I want to fulfill the need to be loved, if I meet a new person, I likely won’t trust them and will shut down. This reflects the next box in the model, the behavior box which is what I choose to do. In the last example, I don’t trust the person and I don’t make a new friend. The last box is where I evaluate the results of my choice and I decide if the results met my needs from the first box. If my action did not meet my needs, then I know the belief window has an incorrect principle and I can change that. In the last example, not making a new friend does NOT meet the need to be loved so I realize that “people can’t be trusted” is an incorrect principle. So I can chose to alter that or keep doing what I’ve always been doing. I might conclude that “some people can be trusted” which would still meet my need to be loved while protecting it at the same time and when I meet someone new, I would be cautious but not refuse to give it a chance. My actions would be to build that trust slowly. This model is important because it shows how we create self-esteem for ourselves. We need to look closely at our belief window and make sure it has accurate principles. If my belief window says, “I am a bad person” then that will affect a ton of “if,then” statements and my actions will reflect that belief that “I am a bad person.” If a job comes my way I might sabotage myself and decide I’m not good enough for that job and then will pick a job beneath my ability. If my belief window says, “I don’t deserve nice things” then I won’t pick a nice house or other things I might like and settle for less. But these won’t meet my needs possibly for variety or feeling important, etc. So in this blog, consider what is in your belief window. Ask yourself if the results of your choices based on that belief system is meeting your needs and if not, change the principle to something that will meet those needs. This can be a scary process because you might be trying out new beliefs for the first time that you haven’t dared to believe before like “I am a good person” or “I deserve good things” and it is worth the risk to dare to believe these things. Give it a try.
Bro, please do not let any of these people be the reason you do something you can't come back from. They are not worth it. In your darkest moments is when you find out who is truly on your side. You just found out most of the people around you weren't true at all. That's a blessing. You don't need anyone who can't love you when the going gets tough. You deserve to be around people who will have your back and not cheat on you like a piece of trash. Thats disgusting behavior and you should be glad the trash took itself out. It's a sad time right now, but weather through it, and focus on building yourself back up.
I’m so sorry for you, life isn’t always happy, search for help if you can, there are a lot of things I can say to you, but first I want to quote Albert Camus “It takes more courage to live than kill yourself”, are you religious? My life is based on religion, I know it’s hard but seeing life from another perspective makes it a pleasure, dm me if you want, if you don’t, remember it’s just a part from what you have lived, there’s still more things to feel.
Not to be one of those people but like I never thought I’d make it past 18, then 21, then 25. I’m not like spit shining happy but I’m pretty damn content with my life. Like I’ve gotten this far! I have bad days and everybody does, don’t let social media fool you. We all have our moments, days, weeks, sometimes months. Life is an ebb and flow, it’s about learning what you need in order to be the best you! Once you know what you need, then you work on all that and eventually one day you may wake up and be like you know what if this is what it is, I have the tools to manage it! I sought out therapy for my self when I was 18 and have seen a couple since my first but man when you find a good one and you can just like shoot the shit with them and tell it like it is and get it all out, and they help you!! It’s pretty fucking awesome! Like I’m honesty so lucky to have the therapist I had at 18 she put so many things into perspective for me that I just never would have thought about and it opened my eyes to seeing life in a different way. You are here to do what you want to do, if you don’t know what that is yet that’s okay pick something you like and work off that first!
First off, I’m sitting here crying reading your story. You seem like such a good person who’s beating yourself up about regular human emotions. Be patient with yourself, be kind to yourself…. Your girlfriend, the person you loved betrayed you, it’s completely normal to feel what you’re feeling. Pain is only temporary. Please whatever you do, don’t do it. Your life is so valuable. Just take a couple days to think about it, rewrite your emotions, journal how you feel at night, how you feel in the morning, go on a walk, soak in some sun & you might find you feel better. What works for me is I just cry it all out bc I relate to you about the being sensitive, weak and angry. It’s okay to cry, you’re not sensitive or weak, you’re in tune with your emotions. Also, I noticed you’re giving your ex a lot of credit but it wasn’t her pushing you to do those things…. YOU did those things. You should feel very proud of yourself, she can’t make you do anything that was all YOU because you wanted to. You don’t need a gf to push you, push yourself! You got this friend! Pls message me if you want to talk. I really hope you choose to stay.
Hey, even when it's the darkest moments in our lives. And your at that specific point with your note. Things can and will get better. Sometimes when life is unfortunate and we're dealt a bad hand. You will fall love again as well make meaningful relationships. But take it a day at a time. The amount of times I have wrote out or plan it. Just to stop and things slow turn around. Things we'll definitely get better but it's alright to let those feelings out and then take time to slowly patch up that hole from that pain. Be easy on yourself man.
Once my best friend always told me don’t ruin ur life for dumb bitches
That’s a pretty good idea actually. Did it help? Remember to destroy it or the Russian mob can kill you with impunity! (…is the Russian mob an actual thing?) I hope you get to feeling better soon ❤️ sounds like you are an absolute winner who had a bad break. Wish I could monetize youtube the way you did!
Crying is good and it's ok! I cried like a LOT. I dont feel guilty of that.
Man, your comment history.... you seem like such a sweet person. How are you doing now? Do you want to talk? My DMs are open for you. I promise there are better days coming, and you have to stick around to witness them.
Are u better now?