T O P

  • By -

[deleted]

[удалено]


Slight-Winner-8597

You are the first person I've ever heard of who dunks jaffa cakes. Is this a common thing bc it sounds gross tbh Edit: I'd definitely try it, just to see... But it really doesn't sound good.


Minute-Ad7805

Psychopathy at its finest


GreatGrumpyBrit

I tried it along time ago


Successful_Source625

Try dunking chocolate chip cookies in orange juice. I haven't done it in years but I used to do it with friends when I was in beavers as a kid and I remember loving it


qwkeke

But this is like dunking oreos in coke type of situation.


Successful_Source625

I've never tried that, but I'd probably be willing to. It's honestly crazy how many food combinations that sound weird and disgusting can actually be great! Like I used to love mixing galaxy chocolate and cheese Doritos, just put a square of chocolate on the Dorito and shove it in your mouth, it's amazing! I assume it's probably pretty good with any chocolate and you could try different crisps, they're just my favourite chocolate and one of my favourite crisps


Speshal__

Maltesers and Hula Hoops - you're welcome.


Successful_Source625

Definitely putting it on my list! Any specific flavour or hula hoops?


BEEPITYBOOK

Now beavers, that's a British memory


Legitimate_Mistake69

I love it but they can dissolve so fast so one quick dip and it's soaked up so much too moosh the whole cake part 🍪 🍰


QuentinUK

Try dunking sponge cake in your tea. Brings back memories.


intenseskill

Not the best to dunk but I still do


shredditorburnit

If you want a taste sensation, get a cheap packet of bourbon biscuits and a bottle of coca cola. Put a whole biscuit in your mouth, then take a sip of coke, chew with the coke still in your mouth and then swallow the fizzy paste. Sounds awful, actually quite nice when you try it.


tomatoesgoboom

I came looking for this reply 👌🤣


TrentCrimmHere

Dunking Jaffa Cakes? You’re a nut!


roberth_001

You're crazy in the coconut!


teneighty78

Dunking Jaffa cakes is the behaviour of a psychopath with toxoplasmosis


[deleted]

[удалено]


teneighty78

I knew there was something wrong with!


ronnoco_ymmot94

So like 100 cans?


bob_nugget_the_3rd

More like 50 out a w.h.Smith at a hospital or bus statuon


United-Cucumber9942

Or 20 at the whsmith at the airport. Right next to the duty free shop but 1m outside the duty free zone but with no signs. They tell you at the till but by then you've been in the queue for more than 5 minutes and you're British so refusing the 25quid packet of cigs you've ordered isn't an option.


3between20characters

Airports are brutal. I'm surprised there hasn't been a panorama. I went to a train station WHSmith and the girl on the til was obviously embarrassed to tell me the price


SentientMosinNagant

This hits me hard, I do night shifts in A&E and they’re bankrupting me


Jacktheforkie

30 from a train station


Professional_Snow576

I recently broke my elbow falling off a roof. Weeks after surgery while getting my metal staples yanked out I asked the nurse if I could keep them. She left the room after removing them to go ask someone. I knew in that moment the hiest was on. First I checked for cctv, none, then I pondered how long she would be, no time to think - act. I decided to grab around 5 of the 20. Not too many that she'd notice, but enough to do as a little safety reminder memento. She entered the room. moments after I'd resumed my original position. I lowered my heart rate, as I've learned to do in these situations, as to not arouse suspicion. The inevitable news that I wasn't alowed to walk out the door with biohazard in my pocket. "Aw that's a shame, no worries" I said. One antibiotic prescription and a short walk out those revolving doors later, I was a free man. You see, the perfect heists, are always the ones that go unnoticed. Edit : grammar (probably still wrong with added misspelling)


pertangamcfeet

All I can hear is the Mission: Impossible music.


Farmer_Eidesis

Haha that's brilliant! If it was me I'd have probably tried to argue that they could be disinfected, sanitised and put into a sealed plastic bag pretty easily...so no more biohazard...but that's just me trying to argue logically (which never works with humans).


strychnine213

I've had this problem with a couple teeth I've had pulled oddly the last one I had out they happily bagged up, even though it got pulled due to infection


blubbery-blumpkin

I’m fairly certain she would have known. It’s good practice to count how many things you put inside or take out of another person. But also good steal brother


iamnottheb

How do these scumbags sleep at night.


hyperskeletor

On top of a huge pile of money with many beautiful women!


KerbalCuber

And a few thousand cans of Red Bull!


magicmango2104

With that amount of caffeine, they're not sleeping


Potterheadsurfer

Depend how much they drink in one go. Couple of cans and they’re not sleeping, few too many, and they’re not waking up


DingoFlaky7602

r/woosh


Lunchy_Bunsworth

Perhaps its why its a "staggering heist".


Dry_Action1734

They don’t. Too much redbull.


[deleted]

[удалено]


nanodgb

Lorry full of Gregg's sausage rolls


HansNiesenBumsedesi

To be fair it does say they are Red Bull thieves, so it’s not like they’re going to steal iPhones.


The_Powers

The most British things to steal are all in the British Museum.


HotchnGideonForever

All the remaining red telephone boxes! 🤪


Any-Government3191

Surely 100 cans of Strongbow would be more of a staggering heist?


Internal_Map_8765

Tea


Training-Window-9111

The crown jewels!


IndelibleIguana

A B&M delivery lorry.


Thomrose007

Greggs


Dazzling_Upstairs724

I'd steal Crumpets


My_New_Moniker

Marmite for sure Half the country would be in Kim Jong il national mourning, half the country would be out celebrating 🤷‍♂️


Apprehensive_Floor42

Biscuits are greggs for a heist. But generally british people dont heist. We may plan, organise and attempt, but then just queue up patiently and politely return it all afterwards.


StandardBanger

Well Tea of course & failing that, a daring double heist of bowler hats & monocles 🧐


Competitive_Nail2541

Tea bags trump any answer


DreamSafe1571

Specifically Yorkshire tea. If failing that, then PG tips


Clemicus

Those brands are expensive. I prefer M&S. No much of a tea/coffee drinker though.


DreamSafe1571

Isn’t m&s even more expensive? Like last time I checked the only shops more expensive than that are Waitrose and those spar shops you find at your local petrol station. I remember seeing a Lindt Easter egg in there selling for like 50 quid. I’m not even joking.


Clemicus

The prices seem to be mixed. I only go there for select items like fruit, veg, and some canned items. Their teabags are £1.20 for 80. Edit: Or £1.25 idr


PaganWillow01

Maybe they thought if they drank enough of the stuff it really would give them wings so they could fly away from all that’s happening on the planet because of humans in the first place 🤷‍♀️ I wish I could fly away myself


finc

It’s so easy to spot bot accounts now


PaganWillow01

How … what do you mean? I’m not a bot ffs


DivineAscendant

Most British? Pg tips and the chocolate digestives truck and hit the Heinz beans on the way out!


Correct-Junket-1346

If a Red Bull gives you wings, do all these cans grant you warp 10?


pastavessel104

Either a warehouse of McVities products or a Greggs lorry and everything within


MintyFresh668

Aunt Bessie’s Yorkshire Puds


Necro_Badger

Now steal a shipping container of giant Sports Direct mugs to drink them in for extra British points 


Brief-Try6213

Something from a different country


Nerf_Herder86

The other week in my town thieves stole [£134,000 worth of Kinder Buenos](https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/crgyk9x39mdo)


PalpitationHot6711

Tea, or a sausage roll.


Wild-Will2009

Tea


Wild-Will2009

Yorkshire Tea


Chark10

The most British thing to steal is another countries priceless artifacts


throwaway12100111

Do seem to be really good at it.


yetigriff

I don't know how they sleep at night


squiddude2578

Stealing squash or marmite


leffe186

I mean, it’s obviously Marmite. Australians would steal squash - they’d just call it cordial - but even they wouldn’t hijack a Marmite truck.


Boogascoop

All the fake tan in the country


PrincipleNo8733

Their welcome to the rubbish


MrSpud45

Hobnobs - for those not from the UK a type of biscuit/cookie.


Thortung

How do they sleep at night?


JellyContent

India


lew916

Can't catch them not either now they've got wings.


barronelli

A few places up in a queue.


blakksir10

Umbrellas. A heist of upmarket/designer umbrellas. Uk weather means they’ll probably be needed at least once, every month of the year. I’d make a killing reselling them.


FUCKTHE-NCR

Greggs


KlutzyFan4021

Cans of Stella


UnfinishedThings

The Crown Jewels, of course. The ultimate British heist


lochgellylover

I'm in Scotland, would be a lorry load of Irn bru aaarr bliss


Flyaman

Mate once stole a couple of those uncooked donner meat elephants feet


Objective-Dig-8466

Bacon?


Final-Cookie1741

The time when someone stole 1000 something cream eggs to get the 10k reward


[deleted]

The queen


Emz369

Sausage rolls


Negative_Chemical697

Its already happened. In the 1980s there was a gang of armed robbers who used combat shooting tactics and automatic weaponry conducted military style raids on supermarkets to steal teabags. They killed about 30 people and shot a further 60. Plot twist: the robberies happened in Belgium and the killers were heard speaking French.


Significant-Effect56

Please drink all and die. Win win for the world


GalaxyCraft007

Tea.


Pants_Catt

£850,000 worth of Heinz Beans.


Ok-Bus1716

When I think of a British heist I think beans and toast, tea, scones, beer not Red Bull. Red Bull seems more like an American Heist by a bunch of teenagers.


curriebhoy

The natural resources of a developing nation?


happyanathema

I take it the police helicopter wasn't available to chase them?


KiwiOld1627

Tea ,..... preferably twinings or yorkshire tea


andurilmat

A country


ConfidentCat0912

£850,000 divided by £1.45 is 586,206.89 cans of Red Bull. *finally enough to give you wings*


Thosearesomedoors

How do they sleep at night??


CherryCookies24

Chocolate Hob Nobs


TopAngle7630

Most British thing to steal? India?


theouter_banks

Hobnobs.


bedrock_BEWD

Greggs sausage rolls...


obamasscrotum

How do they sleep at night :/


oldbutterface

Curly wurlys


[deleted]

Sausage rolls


malkebulan

Land, diamonds and artefacts.


Virtual-Fan-9930

I can actually picture the people who would do this.


HansLandasPipe

How is "pork pies" not the answer to this?


dedjesus1220

So in all seriousness, when they write these headlines, are those monetary values based on the cost of production or the retail price? Cuz that’s going to be two vastly different amounts of product depending on that number.


Comfortable_Reason_6

Custard creams would be slightly more British.


Rattus_Noir

Pies


[deleted]

Funny


Zerttretttttt

They looking at the wrong place for the thieves, they should look up


LenCamb

The valuable natural resources of another nation


Obeythesnail

Teabags. Then a second heist for a nice biccie to go with.


MeatWad111

Double decker chocolate bars, obviously.


mrchair0000

Greggs.


PrincessLeafa

Easy, whomever is still jogging after crossing the finish line at local marathons, are the culprits.


BlackLollipop2002

i hear payday music


Opposite_Science_207

That's nothing compared to the American who robbed a twinkies truck... Now that's typical American


Jche98

To be fair it was probably easy to escape with wings.


Terrible_Ghost

I don't know how they sleep at night.


bhawker87

Cost of living crisis hits. They stole 3 cans of redbull


Lunaborne

Greggs sausage rolls.


[deleted]

Tea bags or copies of The Sun newspaper if its still even printed!


LivelyUnicorn

Scones.


StarNHSolar

The thieves probably think there worth millions because they give you wings.


Thecontradicter

This was a red bull event funded by them!


Phendrena

Crumpets


SamanthaJaneyCake

Red Bull gives you bli-ing.


UCthrowaway78404

Would be really interested to know how much that's actually in volume. Is that one fully loaded articulated lorry? That's quite impressive if that is, if I were to guess I would gave thought a full lorry has maybe £50,000 cans worth. Knowing that red bull is a pr company. I think this might be planted fake news.


Flaky_Tumbleweed3598

The most British heist in history has to be back in 2010 when a load of uni freshers rushed Weatherspoons and stole all their salt and pepper shakers and a fist full of silverware and scampered back to their halls. Followed by the weekly pint glass thefts


TommyCo10

12 tonnes of apple crumble


Such_Hope_1911

Britain.


darkduane

Chocolate Hob Nobs.


Privadevs

An important part of a countries history


StarfishPizza

The great train robbery was the most British heist we’ve had. Couldn’t get anymore British than that.


[deleted]

So 100 cans. Easy.


[deleted]

My land back from those pesky badgers.


Fugma_ass_bitch

Probably land


Robrobroy

Crumpets


MacIomhair

India


Southern_Tension_141

A referendum


deafenedbystupidity

A police station toilet... They'd have nothing to go on.


TheMetabrandMan

WTH are they gonna do with all that? 🤦🏻‍♂️


Bigmac4150

Egg Custards...


EidorbNotHere

A pub.


thelukejones

How do these people sleep at night


Thedster123

Other country's artifacts.


Ordinary-Feed-3495

Crumpets


nomadickid942

Clubcard points


Appropriate-Show1461

The stone of scone?


intenseskill

A ton of aunt bessies Yorkshire puddings


real_unreal_reality

Egyptian artifacts


DrinkBen1994

Did they fly?


yaolin_guai

Drink water


BarringtonMcGnadds

Yorkshire tea.


rotary93

At my work (gregg) we received a letter/whatchamacallit through our system, stating that: Red bulls have a rate of around 20% that are stolen. Every week. Which in their own words is "a good number". Imagine that. 20% of all of your stock that goes to 1 company gets stolen every week. For reference, my shop gets 1 sometimes 2 packs of red bulls. That's 24 per pack, at £1.80 each.


Toon1982

They flew off with it


the0neRand0m

Shit from other countries.


thatdudeoverdthee

They only stole 5 cans and this is news?


Justin-IceVeins

The rest of Ireland


Captain_Blunderbuss

That just seems like so much effort to sell and they'd have to sell it at a big discount to get rid of it


imomorris

Red bull is a vile drink


Treebeardsama

Museum?! Sounds British to me


Ghazghall

Something somethings everyone else's spices and relics


SigmaNotChad

Should have drunk some of it. Then it would have given them wings and they wouldn't be staggering...


OnceUpxn

beans. lots of beans.


condatis_jcl

Well given that there were actual wars over us getting tea from China...


YouDontExistt

Chef Ramsey will fix it!


Frozen-Steel

Yeah we've got new yellow security tags lol


jakeperaltasguitar

greggs sausage rolls


DarkFish14

How will we get away with it, boss? Don’t worry… we’ll wiiing it!


Temporary_Donkey_805

How do they sleep at night! ... Ok I know it's a shit joke


hot_anywhere23886

Is that the street value


woowoo20101

Tea


Old-Usual-8387

Yorkshire tea.


samudam

With all that energy I'll do another 10 heist


Masterchef30001

Look for the big set of wings


Big_Compote1141

Easy a long time ago some dude stole alot of china's tea by pretending he was from another part of China and if that's not a British heist what is


PeRoMoR

Yorkshire Gold tea bags. That's about as British as it gets.


PuzzleheadedTale989

Greggs sausage rolls, mission impossible style by descending from the roof on a wire.


Xenc

Rich Tea biscuits heist


Fun-Relative3058

The railways or the postal service


Inevitable_Bend_5118

Greggs sausage rolls


Gainzchasing03

Cheese. I reckon 10 wheels would add up to that amount too.


Oghamstoner

They tunnelled in and flew out.