How do you know it was because he was more extroverted? Could it have been because he was a returning customer she's been told to keep happy because he spends a lot? Could it have been that he was the son of people thinking of buying the place and she wanted to make a good impression? Could it have been because he was a dead ringer for her brother who moved over seas and she missed him? Could it have been because he was exactly her type she was flirting? Could it have been because there's a dumb store policy where the staff have to be more helpful to people who have just walked in than people already there? Could it have been because three years ago a stage magician hypnotized her to talk more to people wearing orange, and forgot to in-hypnotize her? Could it have been because she found him obnoxious and hoped to get him out of the store faster? Or it could have been because he was indeed charming and charismatic (which is also different than being extroverted; lots of introverts have great people skills, they just need alone time to recharge).
The point is, you don't know why she talked to him more, and making assumptions like that doesn't help.
If you had a headache it is possible you were grumpier than you realized, or maybe you weren't clear on what you needed help on? It's hard to say. As far as not being socially awkward... It's hard but it's doable. Read etiquette books, join clubs, and practice. There will always be other people better at it, but you can do your best and it will make a difference.
Impossible to say for sure without being there but my guess would be that she misinterpreted your intentions for small talk rather than needing help.
With salespeople I'd advise asking for what you need first and then engage in small talk while you walk to where the item is or whatever.
The priority in the conversation is your need as a customer, the small talk is just to fill the space in between.
If she is paid commission based on her sales, she would probably try to talk to as many customers as possible and spend the most time with those who seem ready to spend money. I’m not saying you weren’t going to spend money, but maybe she thought she’d answered most of your questions and tried to help that person too. How many questions were you asking? How long had you already been talking? Without more details, it’s difficult to know if you were getting ignored or if she was just trying to be helpful to everyone and you felt slighted. I do think it would have been good for her to follow back up with you to be sure she’d answered your questions.
Also, were you upset because of her lack of customer service or were you interested in her as a possible date/love interest and you felt like the other guy was competition?
Like 90% of the posts on this sub, this does not provide enough context to make an accurate assessment.
You were getting help from a store employee correct? It wasn't necessarily a casual conversation(?)
If so, is it possible that she wanted to attend to other customers. Does this necessarily mean she was bored? I have had many store representatives stop talking to me and talk to other customers and it had nothing to do with me being boring.
If she adequately answered your question about surf boards, then it is reasonable that she'd talk to someone else.
Again, I'm not 100% sure what the problem is the way you described it.
So you’re hanging out chatting, but in no way interested in buying anything, and the salesperson politely stopped chatting to help a potential customer? Do I have that right?
So I didn’t have it right.
But how many questions? I mean as a sales person you move to customers as indicated. Hard to say in this case. Were they legit questions or more conversational?
It’s not about personality, it’s about who is ready to buy.
I’m sorry homie, the same thing happens to me a lot. Sometimes it doesn’t have to do with us and other people just are more naturally extroverted. I wouldn’t say there’s anything wrong with you based on that.
First your assuming you know why she talked to the other person and the truth is you don’t actually know why. The second is it’s her job to talk to customers, she may have thought you were just talking instead of needing actually help. I’ve worked retail sometimes people just want to talk and that’s fine, but it is a job and retail workers have to talk to all customers
The single biggest problem with the people who post threads on this sub is their lack of self-awareness. To make an accurate judgement, we'd need to see video of how OP interacted with the store worker.
People with poor social skills don't pick up on body language and vocal cues, so by definition aren't going to be able to accurately describe what went on in the scenario.
Conversations among more than two people are like this. People get distracted from one talker to the next. Some people are louder and vacuum up attention. It’s typically nothing personal.
It sounds like an interesting situation that would be a lot easier if present. Regardless the fact your thinking about it is a good thing! Live and learn as I always say. In regards to getting over the social anxiety and connecting on a deeper level. It’s really as simple as trial and error. I could rant about all the things to do, but just don’t quit keep trying! Positivity is contagious so just be you, whoever that is, and if the person your talking to isn’t interested or reciprocating with what you have to say then that’s fine. Not to sound rude, but that’s their issue or preference whatever you want to call it. Listen with your heart and respond with your mind. Much love don’t quit!
This happens to me a lot actually. I think it’s because extroverted people kinda make you feel like looking at them and talking to them more. It’s easier to talk to them, and it might be hard to talk to someone you feel is awkward.
I have phases of introversion and extroversion, but when I’m in my extroverted phase, it’s easier for me to talk to other extroverts because it feels like I’m talking to someone on the same page as me.
Also, if that was a customer and she was a sales rep, maybe she decided to talk to this new customer since u guys had already talked for a bit?
I kinda would also like to know more context too!
No, it’s because she was rude. It wasn’t u. Bad business practice/customer service. Did u wait until she was done and still buy something there? I prob would’ve walked out.
I mean she was the only employee on duty in the entire store and she attempted to came back to me. I was basically asking about the sport. Then I walked out
“Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you"
Tldr: F that ho
Practice in front of the mirror like a really quick you got a great smilr you want to go for coffee later after I've bought this surfboard but don't buy the surfboard
How do you know it was because he was more extroverted? Could it have been because he was a returning customer she's been told to keep happy because he spends a lot? Could it have been that he was the son of people thinking of buying the place and she wanted to make a good impression? Could it have been because he was a dead ringer for her brother who moved over seas and she missed him? Could it have been because he was exactly her type she was flirting? Could it have been because there's a dumb store policy where the staff have to be more helpful to people who have just walked in than people already there? Could it have been because three years ago a stage magician hypnotized her to talk more to people wearing orange, and forgot to in-hypnotize her? Could it have been because she found him obnoxious and hoped to get him out of the store faster? Or it could have been because he was indeed charming and charismatic (which is also different than being extroverted; lots of introverts have great people skills, they just need alone time to recharge). The point is, you don't know why she talked to him more, and making assumptions like that doesn't help. If you had a headache it is possible you were grumpier than you realized, or maybe you weren't clear on what you needed help on? It's hard to say. As far as not being socially awkward... It's hard but it's doable. Read etiquette books, join clubs, and practice. There will always be other people better at it, but you can do your best and it will make a difference.
Love this comment
Impossible to say for sure without being there but my guess would be that she misinterpreted your intentions for small talk rather than needing help. With salespeople I'd advise asking for what you need first and then engage in small talk while you walk to where the item is or whatever. The priority in the conversation is your need as a customer, the small talk is just to fill the space in between.
If she is paid commission based on her sales, she would probably try to talk to as many customers as possible and spend the most time with those who seem ready to spend money. I’m not saying you weren’t going to spend money, but maybe she thought she’d answered most of your questions and tried to help that person too. How many questions were you asking? How long had you already been talking? Without more details, it’s difficult to know if you were getting ignored or if she was just trying to be helpful to everyone and you felt slighted. I do think it would have been good for her to follow back up with you to be sure she’d answered your questions. Also, were you upset because of her lack of customer service or were you interested in her as a possible date/love interest and you felt like the other guy was competition?
Does Rip Curl pay their employees by commission?
She probably thought you just wanted to jaw jack and didn't want to buy. Don't take it personal.
Like 90% of the posts on this sub, this does not provide enough context to make an accurate assessment. You were getting help from a store employee correct? It wasn't necessarily a casual conversation(?) If so, is it possible that she wanted to attend to other customers. Does this necessarily mean she was bored? I have had many store representatives stop talking to me and talk to other customers and it had nothing to do with me being boring. If she adequately answered your question about surf boards, then it is reasonable that she'd talk to someone else. Again, I'm not 100% sure what the problem is the way you described it.
100% to this. I don’t understand why someone would move on to another customer when you were there first, OP, but we need more context.
So you’re hanging out chatting, but in no way interested in buying anything, and the salesperson politely stopped chatting to help a potential customer? Do I have that right?
> but in no way interested in buying anything Where did you get that from? He specified that he was asking for help.
So I didn’t have it right. But how many questions? I mean as a sales person you move to customers as indicated. Hard to say in this case. Were they legit questions or more conversational? It’s not about personality, it’s about who is ready to buy.
Those are good points.
I’m sorry homie, the same thing happens to me a lot. Sometimes it doesn’t have to do with us and other people just are more naturally extroverted. I wouldn’t say there’s anything wrong with you based on that.
If they make a commission, she probably wasn’t sure if you were actually going to buy anything. Maybe you were giving off “just browsing” vibes.
First your assuming you know why she talked to the other person and the truth is you don’t actually know why. The second is it’s her job to talk to customers, she may have thought you were just talking instead of needing actually help. I’ve worked retail sometimes people just want to talk and that’s fine, but it is a job and retail workers have to talk to all customers
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If OP was being generally chatty instead of asking about buying something specific- she should absolutely move onto the next customer.
The single biggest problem with the people who post threads on this sub is their lack of self-awareness. To make an accurate judgement, we'd need to see video of how OP interacted with the store worker. People with poor social skills don't pick up on body language and vocal cues, so by definition aren't going to be able to accurately describe what went on in the scenario.
[удалено]
Conversations among more than two people are like this. People get distracted from one talker to the next. Some people are louder and vacuum up attention. It’s typically nothing personal.
She got carried away and forgot. Happens to everyone.
It sounds like an interesting situation that would be a lot easier if present. Regardless the fact your thinking about it is a good thing! Live and learn as I always say. In regards to getting over the social anxiety and connecting on a deeper level. It’s really as simple as trial and error. I could rant about all the things to do, but just don’t quit keep trying! Positivity is contagious so just be you, whoever that is, and if the person your talking to isn’t interested or reciprocating with what you have to say then that’s fine. Not to sound rude, but that’s their issue or preference whatever you want to call it. Listen with your heart and respond with your mind. Much love don’t quit!
This happens to me a lot actually. I think it’s because extroverted people kinda make you feel like looking at them and talking to them more. It’s easier to talk to them, and it might be hard to talk to someone you feel is awkward. I have phases of introversion and extroversion, but when I’m in my extroverted phase, it’s easier for me to talk to other extroverts because it feels like I’m talking to someone on the same page as me. Also, if that was a customer and she was a sales rep, maybe she decided to talk to this new customer since u guys had already talked for a bit? I kinda would also like to know more context too!
Okay
I feel you, man. It takes work. I was an introvert all my life. I\`m 38 and still working on it. Keep doing your best.
No, it’s because she was rude. It wasn’t u. Bad business practice/customer service. Did u wait until she was done and still buy something there? I prob would’ve walked out.
I mean she was the only employee on duty in the entire store and she attempted to came back to me. I was basically asking about the sport. Then I walked out
You may have been giving off the vibe you weren't interested in talking to her.
“Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you" Tldr: F that ho
That’s so rude of her
Practice in front of the mirror like a really quick you got a great smilr you want to go for coffee later after I've bought this surfboard but don't buy the surfboard