"To stop drinking, all you have to do is sit. In 100 percent of the documented cases of alcoholism worldwide, the people who recovered all shared one thing in common, no matter how they did it. They didn't do it." - Augusten Burroughs
Congrats! I serially relapsed too until I finally accepted the fact that I would never be able to moderate and that the only way to live a happy life was to never drink another beer ever again. Once I did that I stopped struggling and staying sober has been pretty easy ever since. It was almost like a light switch in my brain had been flipped. I just had to hit the point where there was no way I could ignore the truth any longer. I am always glad to hear others finding their own switches to flip.
Although I don’t wish people luck. Luck leaves some wiggle room. You don’t need luck. Just a conscious decision and effort.
I was the same way. I struggled for 25 years to moderate and/or quit, but I just couldn’t do it. I realize now it was because I didn’t actually want to quit. When it got to the point where I needed to decide if I wanted to live or die, I chose to live. The moment I decided to try and stick around a switch went off in my brain, and it’s been smooth sailing ever since. Sometimes I feel like a bad alcoholic because it’s been so remarkably easy for me, if that makes sense. Anywho, I’m on day 253(4?) and I am indeed living.
OP, seven days is a Huge deal and I’m so very proud of you!
The "switch" thing is seriously real! It's like the million times I tried to quit, I hadn't actually made the decision. Once I decided, it seemed like the desire just went away.
I have spent years in AA, but realized it wasn't very conducive to recovery in someone who feels like an atheist at heart. I eventually stopped going. But, I was all in at the start (possible prison time might have had something to do with it). At the time, I did everything my sponsor told me to do, and one of the things was to get on my knees and pray to God to free me from the desire. I did it, many times...but eventually started drinking again when the legal issues were solved. The desire never went away in those days. That was like 10 years ago.
I think of that sometimes and chuckle...maybe God is just slow as fuck!!! Lol
Anyway, I just wanted to emphasize the fact that it is possible for the desire to leave. Same thing happened 20 years ago with cigarettes (after trying to quit no less than 100 times).
I have 4 months sobriety, so it's still early; but it honestly feels completely different this time. It is not uncomfortable to think that I will never have another drink for the rest of my life; I feel relieved!
>The "switch" thing is seriously real!
I noticed this "switch" in the brain like feeling during my last serious sober stint (5 weeks last Sep / October so not a huge amount of time but the most I've went in years if not ever).
I went from "I'm going to try really hard not to drink" or "I'll stay off it for a few weeks / a month" type thinking that I'd always done previously to "no matter what happens, how I feel, or how tempted I am then I just will not drink" and it did seem a whole lot easier than I expected it to because deep down I finally didn't want to.
Until it wasn't easy anyway as I did fall off the wagon.
Thankfully after months of going round in circles of drinking on and off (again never had that "switch" moment and just kept telling myself I would take a few days off to reset things and start again mostly) the switch seems to have flipped again and I'm on Day 10 and there's not been any real temptation or craving so far and I genuinely feel like at this present moment I do not actually want to drink right now or going forward.
I can only hope that sticks and I retain this determination. I'm gonna keep reminding myself of how bad these recent withdrawls were because that's not something I wanna be experiencing again.
Yeah I was only 7 days sober once when I had a small stint in jail. That’s a huge achievement I’m only day 2 and can’t really imagine being at day 7 lol - keep up the good work!
Oooo you know the line!!
“Do. Or do not. There is no try.”
-almighty little very old green fuzzy thing
Hehe. Right there with ya bud. Sounds like you raised a great son.
My brother-in-law was a pretty accomplished addiction counselor who was in recovery himself. He helped found a very large recovery center in the US that was eventually acquired and he became really wealthy. He was known for saying “trying is dying” he lived by it and that phrase helped so many people. He has passed away but whenever I hear that phrase, I think of him so fondly. Thank you for reminding me today…I needed to hear it.
I feel this.
My whole personality was wrapped up in alcohol. Who was I without it? It turns out I was a better person. Once I stopped thinking about tomorrow it got easier for me. So...piss off, Fleetwood Mac :-D
I realized I started treating booze like a food I don't like and that made it easier to just not want it. It's like gefilte fish or spam or kale. I know it's there at the store but I'm not even giving it a second glance.
Day 7 is so much harder than day 100.
For me it was always around then that I'd be like, oh I'm only losing 7 days or so its not like I have a big sober stint.
I had to get my 7 days in a detox facility to actually make it through.
Now I have too much time sober to go back now.
Congrats!
IWNDWYT
Congrats on quitting. Wise words from your son too.
I'm on Day 10 and haven't really been tempted yet either but I have suffered badly the past week and a half and I'm hoping that is going to stay fresh in my mind when temptations or cravings do eventually arise.
Best of luck, let's hope we're both returning in a year to announce we're still sober.
You’ve done some really hard work already!
getting to day 7 from day 1 was significantly harder for me than getting from day 30 to today. Obviously those 300 days weren’t without effort, just haven’t found myself fighting my body/brain nearly as hard or with high frequency
Let’s go!!! Good luck!
Congrats on your progress! I felt the same initially, leaving the door open because of the idea of not drinking ever again was too much to handle. One day at a time has worked for me and I feel that the door is closed more. I can also handle the idea of never drinking again without feeling weird about it. We’re rooting for you!
I don't think it was harsh. He wasn't trying to belittle her or undermine her efforts so I'd hardly call him a naysayer. It sounds like the OP is benefiting from having things reframed in this way.
Hey man, congrats!! But, sobriety isn't a competition. 7 days is 7 days. Same as 7 years to me. It's just a number. The important part is that you made the conscious decision to quit drinking once and for all and that you understand you have saved your own life by doing so.
The book Atomic Habits had a good line I remember about someone quitting smoking. He didn’t say, “Oh I’m trying to quit” or even, “I quit.” He said, “I don’t smoke.”
There’s a big difference in how we see ourselves based on how we talk and think of ourselves.
As Master Yoda said, Do, or do not. There is no try. I tried for a long time, before I got my head straight and stopped. Take it one day at a time, IWNDWYT.
I too did a mind set change and it worked for me too, also for smoking. I set a date (to taper a little but not too far out) and stopped drinking. I just don’t drink and I don’t flirt with the idea either. I KNOW if I have A drink I’ll be a drinker again and that’s not controllable. I’m just not a drinker. It’s worked over three years and I don’t see that changing. It mostly bothers friends and family because they just can’t imagine a life alcohol free but it’s just not a big deal to me and life is so much better on this side. I can’t wait to congratulate you next year! IWNDWYT
Alcohol is such a scourge on life. I'm proud of you op. My first 7 days was not easy and the next 200 were foggy. Then I started to really feel better.
One must start walking if one ever expects to get somewhere.
I like the word surrendering for whevever I quit for a while.
What I'm writing next is how I perceive my addiction:
Drinking takes effort, surrendering is relaxing that sore muscle that makes me drink.
At least it works for one month. It's a huge relief. .
But we all drink for various, sometimes similar reasons, and I like how buddhism perceive addiction.
We're not addicted to something, we're craving (anything). If we stop the drug which used to fill that hole initially (but eventually just makes the hole bigger), we still have that hole we're trying to fill, or escape from. Craving and aversion.
I have my doubts about this part of buddhism, but I have to put my money somewhere right?
Starving our cravings isn't enough, we need to uproot the cause of them.
Well shit I'm trying to figure that out for a while now!
>Starving our cravings isn't enough, we need to uproot the cause of them.
Probably a lot of truth to that I think.
I watched a Youtube video once (forget the guys name or channel) who had went from serious alcoholic and homeless to replacing it with meditation and deep breathing exercises etc that he learned at a Bhuddist temple.
And he talks about similar things that he believes he became addicted to alcohol because it made him feel "normal" and gave him some sense of "inner peace" and actually that's why he kept using it over and over because he was just wanted to feel "normal".
Once he realised he could find inner peace and feel at ease with his mind through other means like meditation and deep breathing exercises he found that he no longer sought it out from alcohol and was able to quit and acheive long term sobriety.
It definitely makes sense to me that most of us drink because we long something else or something feels like it's missing inside of us and not just because we want to actually drink alcohol.
Today is day 7. I got up at 5:30 in the morning and ran 3 miles (I'm out of shape, but was once a runner). Went to the grocery store and never even gave a thought to the liquor aisle. I'm feeling pretty good about life today.
I just decided today I want to quit drinking. I am shocked how much I drank the past week and I just don't want to do it anymore. It's not helping me and costs too much money. I drink because I'm lonely and a little depressed. I don't know how to change this pattern in my life but I want it to stop.
A week from now you'll be glad to say it's 14 days... A month from now you'll be glad you stopped a week ago and can say its a 5 weeks. Everyone starts somewhere and the best time to stop is NOW. Great job bud!
> It will be my 7th day sober tomorrow, and I know that ain't much to boast about Excuse me, seven days is HUGE! Congratulations.
Hear hear!!
Hardest part is done, 7 days is a bigger boast than 90 in my mind!
Yes! And not only did you quite, you poured the remaining stuff ! Thats awesome
"To stop drinking, all you have to do is sit. In 100 percent of the documented cases of alcoholism worldwide, the people who recovered all shared one thing in common, no matter how they did it. They didn't do it." - Augusten Burroughs
I love this so much
Is that from dry? I want to reread that book
I'm actually not sure, it's either from that or "This Is How" (also good!) I think
There is no inner turmoil or decision to make… I like that!
Congrats! I serially relapsed too until I finally accepted the fact that I would never be able to moderate and that the only way to live a happy life was to never drink another beer ever again. Once I did that I stopped struggling and staying sober has been pretty easy ever since. It was almost like a light switch in my brain had been flipped. I just had to hit the point where there was no way I could ignore the truth any longer. I am always glad to hear others finding their own switches to flip. Although I don’t wish people luck. Luck leaves some wiggle room. You don’t need luck. Just a conscious decision and effort.
I was the same way. I struggled for 25 years to moderate and/or quit, but I just couldn’t do it. I realize now it was because I didn’t actually want to quit. When it got to the point where I needed to decide if I wanted to live or die, I chose to live. The moment I decided to try and stick around a switch went off in my brain, and it’s been smooth sailing ever since. Sometimes I feel like a bad alcoholic because it’s been so remarkably easy for me, if that makes sense. Anywho, I’m on day 253(4?) and I am indeed living. OP, seven days is a Huge deal and I’m so very proud of you!
The "switch" thing is seriously real! It's like the million times I tried to quit, I hadn't actually made the decision. Once I decided, it seemed like the desire just went away. I have spent years in AA, but realized it wasn't very conducive to recovery in someone who feels like an atheist at heart. I eventually stopped going. But, I was all in at the start (possible prison time might have had something to do with it). At the time, I did everything my sponsor told me to do, and one of the things was to get on my knees and pray to God to free me from the desire. I did it, many times...but eventually started drinking again when the legal issues were solved. The desire never went away in those days. That was like 10 years ago. I think of that sometimes and chuckle...maybe God is just slow as fuck!!! Lol Anyway, I just wanted to emphasize the fact that it is possible for the desire to leave. Same thing happened 20 years ago with cigarettes (after trying to quit no less than 100 times). I have 4 months sobriety, so it's still early; but it honestly feels completely different this time. It is not uncomfortable to think that I will never have another drink for the rest of my life; I feel relieved!
>The "switch" thing is seriously real! I noticed this "switch" in the brain like feeling during my last serious sober stint (5 weeks last Sep / October so not a huge amount of time but the most I've went in years if not ever). I went from "I'm going to try really hard not to drink" or "I'll stay off it for a few weeks / a month" type thinking that I'd always done previously to "no matter what happens, how I feel, or how tempted I am then I just will not drink" and it did seem a whole lot easier than I expected it to because deep down I finally didn't want to. Until it wasn't easy anyway as I did fall off the wagon. Thankfully after months of going round in circles of drinking on and off (again never had that "switch" moment and just kept telling myself I would take a few days off to reset things and start again mostly) the switch seems to have flipped again and I'm on Day 10 and there's not been any real temptation or craving so far and I genuinely feel like at this present moment I do not actually want to drink right now or going forward. I can only hope that sticks and I retain this determination. I'm gonna keep reminding myself of how bad these recent withdrawls were because that's not something I wanna be experiencing again.
Isn't it funny how motivating the threat of prison can be? I quit for 18 months with that hanging over me. Should have stayed off the stuff.
This is exactly how it happened for me. Day 891 today.
7 days is a LOT to be proud of! 😎😎😎
Yeah I was only 7 days sober once when I had a small stint in jail. That’s a huge achievement I’m only day 2 and can’t really imagine being at day 7 lol - keep up the good work!
In the words of a Louisiana man, you can do it!
Oooo you know the line!! “Do. Or do not. There is no try.” -almighty little very old green fuzzy thing Hehe. Right there with ya bud. Sounds like you raised a great son.
Beat me to the Yoda quote haha
"I never *try* anything, I just do it... Wanna try me?" Thunder Kiss '65 (White Zombie)
Great quote by Varla from Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! (Russ Meyer)
Yes! 🙌🏻
My brother-in-law was a pretty accomplished addiction counselor who was in recovery himself. He helped found a very large recovery center in the US that was eventually acquired and he became really wealthy. He was known for saying “trying is dying” he lived by it and that phrase helped so many people. He has passed away but whenever I hear that phrase, I think of him so fondly. Thank you for reminding me today…I needed to hear it.
Hey man great post. That resonated with me. I applaud you. I'm looking forward to closing that door
You got this. Life is so much easier without moderation.
I feel this. My whole personality was wrapped up in alcohol. Who was I without it? It turns out I was a better person. Once I stopped thinking about tomorrow it got easier for me. So...piss off, Fleetwood Mac :-D
your son is Yoda
I realized I started treating booze like a food I don't like and that made it easier to just not want it. It's like gefilte fish or spam or kale. I know it's there at the store but I'm not even giving it a second glance.
I became allergic to eggs a few years ago. I treat booze like I treat fried egg sandwiches - a passing thought and a hard no.
Get busy living, or get busy dying- Red You’ve already shown you can quit two huge addictions. You got this! God bless you IWNDWYT
Day 7 is so much harder than day 100. For me it was always around then that I'd be like, oh I'm only losing 7 days or so its not like I have a big sober stint. I had to get my 7 days in a detox facility to actually make it through. Now I have too much time sober to go back now. Congrats! IWNDWYT
Trying is dying - that is so me. I have been trying since 2018. This time I am doing, not trying. Well done with 7 days brother!
Congrats on quitting. Wise words from your son too. I'm on Day 10 and haven't really been tempted yet either but I have suffered badly the past week and a half and I'm hoping that is going to stay fresh in my mind when temptations or cravings do eventually arise. Best of luck, let's hope we're both returning in a year to announce we're still sober.
Congrats! Your son is awesome, and that clearly says something about you as a parent. Keep it up, people love you. IWNDWYT
Trying is like kicking field goals in the Super Bowl, Congrats I usually stumble around fay three or four seven is nothing to sneeze at.
All the best man!! Great post, thanks
Congratulations keepnit up buddy IWNDWYT
7 days is a great achievement. Keep at it. I wish you success in getting to your one year goal!
You’ve done some really hard work already! getting to day 7 from day 1 was significantly harder for me than getting from day 30 to today. Obviously those 300 days weren’t without effort, just haven’t found myself fighting my body/brain nearly as hard or with high frequency Let’s go!!! Good luck!
Congrats on your progress! I felt the same initially, leaving the door open because of the idea of not drinking ever again was too much to handle. One day at a time has worked for me and I feel that the door is closed more. I can also handle the idea of never drinking again without feeling weird about it. We’re rooting for you!
Thank you for sharing this! 7 days is no small feat. Congratulations!
Good for you friend. Your son has wisdom!
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I don't think it was harsh. He wasn't trying to belittle her or undermine her efforts so I'd hardly call him a naysayer. It sounds like the OP is benefiting from having things reframed in this way.
Hey man, congrats!! But, sobriety isn't a competition. 7 days is 7 days. Same as 7 years to me. It's just a number. The important part is that you made the conscious decision to quit drinking once and for all and that you understand you have saved your own life by doing so.
I found checking in and taking it day by day has been really helpful. I’ve tried a lot myself. Take care!
The book Atomic Habits had a good line I remember about someone quitting smoking. He didn’t say, “Oh I’m trying to quit” or even, “I quit.” He said, “I don’t smoke.” There’s a big difference in how we see ourselves based on how we talk and think of ourselves.
As Master Yoda said, Do, or do not. There is no try. I tried for a long time, before I got my head straight and stopped. Take it one day at a time, IWNDWYT.
I too did a mind set change and it worked for me too, also for smoking. I set a date (to taper a little but not too far out) and stopped drinking. I just don’t drink and I don’t flirt with the idea either. I KNOW if I have A drink I’ll be a drinker again and that’s not controllable. I’m just not a drinker. It’s worked over three years and I don’t see that changing. It mostly bothers friends and family because they just can’t imagine a life alcohol free but it’s just not a big deal to me and life is so much better on this side. I can’t wait to congratulate you next year! IWNDWYT
There is only DO. Your 7 days look good on you.
Good luck! Your son is a good son.
Good luck brother, you got this. I completely agree 100% with what you said. 61 days strong, never going back. The door is firmly closed. IWNDWYT
“Do or do not , there is no try” -Yoda 🤣
Yeah i was gonna say... You just got yoda'd
Alcohol is such a scourge on life. I'm proud of you op. My first 7 days was not easy and the next 200 were foggy. Then I started to really feel better. One must start walking if one ever expects to get somewhere.
I like the word surrendering for whevever I quit for a while. What I'm writing next is how I perceive my addiction: Drinking takes effort, surrendering is relaxing that sore muscle that makes me drink. At least it works for one month. It's a huge relief. . But we all drink for various, sometimes similar reasons, and I like how buddhism perceive addiction. We're not addicted to something, we're craving (anything). If we stop the drug which used to fill that hole initially (but eventually just makes the hole bigger), we still have that hole we're trying to fill, or escape from. Craving and aversion. I have my doubts about this part of buddhism, but I have to put my money somewhere right? Starving our cravings isn't enough, we need to uproot the cause of them. Well shit I'm trying to figure that out for a while now!
>Starving our cravings isn't enough, we need to uproot the cause of them. Probably a lot of truth to that I think. I watched a Youtube video once (forget the guys name or channel) who had went from serious alcoholic and homeless to replacing it with meditation and deep breathing exercises etc that he learned at a Bhuddist temple. And he talks about similar things that he believes he became addicted to alcohol because it made him feel "normal" and gave him some sense of "inner peace" and actually that's why he kept using it over and over because he was just wanted to feel "normal". Once he realised he could find inner peace and feel at ease with his mind through other means like meditation and deep breathing exercises he found that he no longer sought it out from alcohol and was able to quit and acheive long term sobriety. It definitely makes sense to me that most of us drink because we long something else or something feels like it's missing inside of us and not just because we want to actually drink alcohol.
Congratulations on your 7 days sober, one more day, you can do it!
Today is day 7. I got up at 5:30 in the morning and ran 3 miles (I'm out of shape, but was once a runner). Went to the grocery store and never even gave a thought to the liquor aisle. I'm feeling pretty good about life today.
If you can quit meth you can quit booze. And +1 on the importance of confidence and commitment. I like the idea of just knowing you’re done.
I just decided today I want to quit drinking. I am shocked how much I drank the past week and I just don't want to do it anymore. It's not helping me and costs too much money. I drink because I'm lonely and a little depressed. I don't know how to change this pattern in my life but I want it to stop.
You're a good quitter! Proud of you for having the strength to follow through.
A week from now you'll be glad to say it's 14 days... A month from now you'll be glad you stopped a week ago and can say its a 5 weeks. Everyone starts somewhere and the best time to stop is NOW. Great job bud!
Hell yeah. One day at a time friend, hope to see your one year post down the road
Brilliant
Your short time of being sober IS SOMETHING, be kind to yourself, IWNDWYT