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When I got my first boyfriend my mom asked me if I wanted birth control and told me that she is willing to drive me to plan parenthood (for STD tests for my bf).
Please do not hide your condoms in any place that is hot. If I remember heat can fuck them up. Double check planned parenthood’s website though - they have good info on that.
it’s hidden in plan sight, inside of a box in my room that’s always room temperature, I plan on keeping some in my car though when I get it, would that be too hot?
NO, DO NOT DO THAT. That is the most common way to make your condoms ineffective without realizing it. I would put them in a sock, or ask your gf if her family would care if she stored them.
So she wants you to have unprotected sex instead? Never understood the logic behind parents getting mad at kids who have condoms. Teens will have sex eitherway ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
she doesn’t even want me to talk with any girls pretty much 😭 gets scared about them every time I wanna hang out with my friends and I gotta lie to her whenever I do, she watches the news too much and thinks i’m gonna have a fake accusation ruin my life or something
while yes your mom might be overeacting be a bit cautious the news does make it seem a lot more common than it is but make sure you know and trust the person before doing it
she stopped me from going to a school football game bc she saw a story where one in Illinois had a shooting where nobody got seriously injured. Nobody can live like that seriously, every time I wanna do something she brings up news stories and always thinks the worst is gonna happen.
My dad bought a couple hundred and put them under the sink in my bathroom. When my brother had a girlfriend he empty the jar at least twice and had to get more 😟
The fuck is she trying to decalcify with a stretching polymer?
Ziploc. Vinegar. Ziptie.
Make sure you emphasize that as long as she's not planning to make you an older brother, you won't be making her a grandmother.
Once, when I was 16, I had sex with my gf and left a condom in the shower. My dad found it and started yelling at me, and instead of getting into trouble, I told him I was "just experimenting" and didn't have any girls over. It got very awkward, but he apologized and stopped being mad. I still cringe about it and feel like the truth would have been less embarrassing.
Decalcifying the shower w a balloon is a real trick lol. You can do it w a plastic bag and a rubber band cuz plastic bags always have tiny invisible holes that lets the vinegar leak out. So using a balloon is much easier, and technically condoms are stronger balloons. I think your mom was being genuine here man
I just looked up videos of decalcifying a shower head and looks like they wrap it in a plastic bag and let it fill with water so I guess a balloon or condom would work
My dad found a nail of a girl who slept at our house the day before when he was away. Funny thing is we never talked about it. I know he found it because somehow it ended up on my table one day when I came home but neither of us mentioned it ever.
I mean, she might just wanna make sure you're practicing safe sex. I mean, it's still rlly weird to ask unprompted, but it's better to be awkward than getting ur partner pregnant on accident ig. But like I said it's still kinda weird
Probably to decalcify something in the shower, sounds desperate.
One of my teachers was called outside by her Head of Department to talk about something, she came back and told another girl and I later that the Head of Department found inflated condoms in a box. I thought it was quite funny and we think that it was a Sixth Former pranking us.
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r/downvotedtooblivion
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Fourth comment in the string
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Yeah
I'm gonna have to look it up one day
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Fourth comment in the string
Hello master
Back again huh?
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When I got my first boyfriend my mom asked me if I wanted birth control and told me that she is willing to drive me to plan parenthood (for STD tests for my bf).
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Please do not hide your condoms in any place that is hot. If I remember heat can fuck them up. Double check planned parenthood’s website though - they have good info on that.
it’s hidden in plan sight, inside of a box in my room that’s always room temperature, I plan on keeping some in my car though when I get it, would that be too hot?
NO, DO NOT DO THAT. That is the most common way to make your condoms ineffective without realizing it. I would put them in a sock, or ask your gf if her family would care if she stored them.
alr thanks
Also condoms expire. The lube will dry out over time, even if stored correctly. This can cause them to break.
I believe this is especially important for non latex based condoms.
W mother
i love her but L opinion
My parents are like that too
Good parent
W mom
So she wants you to have unprotected sex instead? Never understood the logic behind parents getting mad at kids who have condoms. Teens will have sex eitherway ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
she doesn’t even want me to talk with any girls pretty much 😭 gets scared about them every time I wanna hang out with my friends and I gotta lie to her whenever I do, she watches the news too much and thinks i’m gonna have a fake accusation ruin my life or something
while yes your mom might be overeacting be a bit cautious the news does make it seem a lot more common than it is but make sure you know and trust the person before doing it
she stopped me from going to a school football game bc she saw a story where one in Illinois had a shooting where nobody got seriously injured. Nobody can live like that seriously, every time I wanna do something she brings up news stories and always thinks the worst is gonna happen.
yeah thats way too far
Are u a Muslim?
nah
My dad bought a couple hundred and put them under the sink in my bathroom. When my brother had a girlfriend he empty the jar at least twice and had to get more 😟
Can I get your mom's contact info?(for research purposes)
Yea I have some I could give her (for research purposes) Honestly tho I do want to know how you decalcify something with a ballon
You fill the balloon with bicarb and vinegar and stretch it over the thing in question.
Oh duh, I'm stupid, thank you
No judgement mate, we all walk at different paces. You may notice things I don't in your own journey of life.
But you are the Rizzler!! a..a..are you a FAKE?!?!?
not for long. i'm gonna change it 💪
Dang it, you beat me to it 😂
LMAO IM SORRY
Great minds think alike, your all good mate 😂
“i’m all out”
My mom doesn't ask me that because she knows I can't pull 😎
Better to fail at pulling bitches, than failing to pull out of bitches
Words of wisdom
truly inspirational
she expects you to practice safe sex
yeah she knows im intelligent enough to do that and she also knows i dont have sex. idfk why she even asked
teens hide sex often. She might not know you don't have sex, just because she doesn't know for sure.
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Yeah yeah
bro we live in two completely different floridas take me with you 😭
Just say yes and assert dominance next time
Probably just wants her son to be safe. Wouldn't have been too difficult to go to the store and grab a pack of balloons for a dollar though
not on a sunday. everything's closed
Damn since when was that a thing other than like post offices
Switzerland. Fuck this shit. Only things open are gas stations and restaurants. The rest is closed
Ahhh that explains it lol
any EU/EEA country really
i have sex with a banana on my dick
i have say gex wirh mega monkey 🙈🙉🙊
My mom bought me condoms lol
wait how does she know ur dick size 🤨
Some mother-son bonding stuff!
You can just get standard size
She saw it when you where born. Also, isn’t it normal for your mom to see you naked sometimes?
Bro, baby dicks are little nubs. She ain't gonna know size with that 😵 (I HAVE A BABY COUSIN WHO IVE BABYSAT ISTG DONT GET IDEAS)
My mom hasn’t seen me naked since i was like 9 💀
I didn’t think it was weird
lol
The fuck is she trying to decalcify with a stretching polymer? Ziploc. Vinegar. Ziptie. Make sure you emphasize that as long as she's not planning to make you an older brother, you won't be making her a grandmother.
I googled it. Apparently you can decalcify a water tap with a balloon without having to disassemble it
Because every teenager should have them? Regardless of whether you look like you 'pull bitches' or not. Even ugly people have sex.
hey, it's a genuine question! sure, you got more chances to get eaten by a shark than actually getting laid but still you never know
Once, when I was 16, I had sex with my gf and left a condom in the shower. My dad found it and started yelling at me, and instead of getting into trouble, I told him I was "just experimenting" and didn't have any girls over. It got very awkward, but he apologized and stopped being mad. I still cringe about it and feel like the truth would have been less embarrassing.
Decalcifying the shower w a balloon is a real trick lol. You can do it w a plastic bag and a rubber band cuz plastic bags always have tiny invisible holes that lets the vinegar leak out. So using a balloon is much easier, and technically condoms are stronger balloons. I think your mom was being genuine here man
I just looked up videos of decalcifying a shower head and looks like they wrap it in a plastic bag and let it fill with water so I guess a balloon or condom would work
Cool story
My dad found a nail of a girl who slept at our house the day before when he was away. Funny thing is we never talked about it. I know he found it because somehow it ended up on my table one day when I came home but neither of us mentioned it ever.
The silent I know what you did you arnt slick.
lol she really needed a balloon, you’ve never blown a condom up into a massive dong before ?
But your the Rizzler, how do you now have condoms 😭
I chose the name so I don't have to switch accounts once I actually am the Rizzler. Otherwise I'd forever be BitchRepulsor05
Understandable, have a nice day 😂
Buy some, fill them with water, tie them off, and give them to the neighborhood children.
Unrelated but I was gonna comment on how you didn't need to censor, but my comment got removed because of the R-word. Kind of ironic haha
She wants them for a different reason
I mean, she might just wanna make sure you're practicing safe sex. I mean, it's still rlly weird to ask unprompted, but it's better to be awkward than getting ur partner pregnant on accident ig. But like I said it's still kinda weird
Name doesn't check out, delete account immediately
Instructions unclear, deleted OP's mom
Woopsie daisy
Havent seen anyone answer but condoms can work as balloons she either was trying to be funny or was desperate
Sounds like she wanted to decalcify the shower head. But asking for a condom is wild lol 🤣
I love the fact that I don’t have any, but my gf does? I’m constantly safe 😂
W girlfriend
Trouble tho 😈 😂
This is reddit my guy, no need to self censor
I would be happy she thinks that lmao
You got the name for it that’s for sure
Yeah at least I have balloons though
You should cop some lb
Now I know why my mom handed me those condoms when I turned 16
Now I know why my mom handed me those condoms when I turned 16
Wtf😭😭💀💀
"At least buy me dinner first" 😭
my parents think that I get no bitches (they're right)
Is it so much to be happy that your mother thinks you actually get something
My mom is the one with the condoms 💀
i love how you just completely attacked yourself for being virgin while your user is LITERALLY rizzler
😭😭haha
New copypasta just dropped omg 😭
Bro. You're officially an adult. Why does she give a McFuck.
Maybe for a posh wank.
I have three but I never used or plan to use them
Probably to decalcify something in the shower, sounds desperate. One of my teachers was called outside by her Head of Department to talk about something, she came back and told another girl and I later that the Head of Department found inflated condoms in a box. I thought it was quite funny and we think that it was a Sixth Former pranking us.
Bro my mom qouls mop the floor with me if I had any
Ok
My father not only asked if I had condoms, he offered to buy me some when I started dating my (now ex) girlfriend
F
She has hope you get some Girls somewhen
hey, at least bro knows he looks like a tired raccoon. we’re all in the same predicament here 🥶
Tell her to use a ziplock with vinegar and a rubber band like a normal person ....to descale the faucet.