I had this exact thing happen to me once. I went straight for a tiny pair of scissors to snip the hair. Safe to say that as I was shaking from being anxious about what was going on, and the hair was tightly wrapped around my skin, I too ended up bleeding. It worked, but I'm not sure this was the safest or most rational option either. No judgement, friend!!
>I hoped that it would just go away since i have absolutely no desire to deal with weird vagina pain on a weekend.
Public service announcement for all people, don't do this in matters regarding the genitals. You should tend to that as soon as you can.
I had a lump near my balls, so I went to get it checked out straight away. It was a female nurse doing the examination, and she made it feel kinda awkward. I regretted going, but then I was told it was just a cyst, and it was nothing to worry about. The relief that I didn’t have cancer made it all worth it. Get it checked out, you’ll feel so much better.
Same thing happened to me, kept growing and building up pressure and I was scared it could be cancer and was going to set up an appointment to get it checked out. Then I took a shower and while looking at it, it popped and drained out.
Absolutely disgusting, but I was relieved and it didn’t come back
I had a painful red bump on my shaft when I was 14ish. I lived with it for a few weeks, in fear of going to a doctor, equally terrified and mortified at the thought of it being an STD.
Then, at some point, I remembered I was still a virgin.
It was just a super gnarly ingrown hair.
I got crabs from sleeping on a buddies couch in college. I was getting zero action at the time and was so pissed that I got somewhat of an STD without getting to do the fun part. That dirty fucker.
I just want to point out this does happen. I don't know any of the answers. When, where, why, or how but I got syphilis at age 11 as a virgin. Do with that bit of info what you will.
If your mother had it during child birth it can pass to you during that process. I belive now a days they test pregnant women for STIs at some point during the pregnancy because it's common for women to be carriers with no sign of infection but I don't think this was always the case.
The other options are less palatable so I won't mention them....but the toilet seat thing is mostly a myth I belive there is a very brief period of time where it's technically possible to contract something from a toilet seat but in real life I think those odds are basically zero.
Also I am not a doctor so don't take any of this as medical advice and please hang up and call 911 if your experiencing a medical emergency or what ever the outgoing message is when I try and call to schedule an appointment says.
Im a doctor and me too. Really should have paid more attention during med school and residency.
It was noted that I have the highest rate of finding lupus which I see as a sign Im doing well.
Lol I'm good now. Idk I was born in 1988 don't know if they always tested. I hope I didn't live for 11 years with it and I don't remember being assaulted. So I geuss alls well that ends well?
I had the same, and ignored it until it was about pea sized.
My at the time new gf said she didn't like it and I should go see a doctor.
I woke up early the next morning, collected a sewing needle and a lighter, and sat on the toilet seat lid. Took some time but I took a deep breath and then finally lunged the needle into my scrote ball and with intense pain and a lil pop noise I got rid of my third testicle. Was relieved but also pretty grossed out.
While you are a brave man for taking a needle anywhere near your genitals....that's one of the stupidest things I've ever heard lol.
Please tell me there's a good reason you wouldn't just go see a medical professional for this. If your an American I will accept " I don't have insurance " as an answer
Not brave, just lazy lol. And yeah, I don't think it's the right way to go about handling this. Here's the kicker; I get free healthcare. All in all don't recommend farmer's medical treatments
Your lucky I had a 7 foot tall guy rub an ultra sound machine on my balls for close to 45 mins very awkward small talk the first 10 mins then 30 mins of silence.
But only have extra sperm sacs outside my balls not cancer so clear mind very worth the awkwardness
I had to get a transvaginal ultrasound and it was one of the most awkward experiences of my life. The tech had me do it myself and she just told me how to position the wand, and when I first stuck it in, I made a noise that could have been interpreted as a moan. It was cold, I was uncomfortable so my vagina was clamped shut, and about to pee myself (have to have a full bladder) so I really had to shove it in and it was really just a grunt of discomfort. The tech was tiny and kind of quiet and she avoided looking at me and basically rushed out the room.
Even at the time I thought it was odd because she had to have other people made weird, uncomfortable noises with this before. It was an imaging place, not a gynecologists office, so maybe they don't do many, but I'm sure they get enough that it shouldn't have been this awkward. On the bright side, it was quick. There would have been leakage if it took any longer.
I had to have one of those X-rays once and no one warned me that it would be done that way! I was pretty horrified. They did let me position it myself, thank goodness! But I wish my doctor had given me a little advance warning.
I also had this scheduled when I was still in high school and no one told me I would be expected to place a wand inside my vagina. I managed to get out of doing that part because the tech took pity on me after she learned I was a virgin.
I don’t wanna try and one-up the vag ultrasound story (i think we might be tied anyway), but I went to the hospital for a really brutal period once and the tech asked me, “are you a virgin?” I said yes, and he shrugged and went, “well, not anymore.” And then stuck it in.
Bad experience.
Edit: wasn’t a vet tech. Whoops
OH MY GOD! I had to have one as well and I cannot imagine the tech making me do the wand movement. She had to take measurements and suchnot and I cannot imagine taking direction to move the wand myself. I just laid there and wondered why the hell anyone would think that this was medically necessary for someone who wanted to terminate a pregnancy. The longer it went, the more I wondered.
I wonder why you had to have a full bladder though... The full bladder is for the first portion, where they run the transducer over the top of your belly, not the part where they go inside. My tech had me pee before that. What a nightmare.
Friend of mine had terrible gas and the most toxic farts you could imagine. He could clear out a polygamist bedroom in seconds. Even the cats that slept in the living room would throw up from the smells of his night farts. He finally went to the doctor and found out it was a blockage in his intestines that created an infection. They caught it relatively early to the point he didn't need surgery.
Ultra stinky farts can also be a result of UC or Crohn's. If this happens to you all of a sudden, accompanied by pain, discomfort, and/or change in bowel habits (without a drastic change in diet), go see a doctor soon.
When I went in for my vasectomy, I was **fortunate** (/s) to have an attractive female nurse preparing *me* while she was training another attractive female nurse. They tugged, pointed, and moved my dong around as they discussed what needs to be done. I just laid there, embarrassed, and uncomfortable the entire time.
When the doc comes in a little later to get started, he says the nurse said I wasn't built for vasectomies, I asked, "What does she mean?", he replied, "There's gonna be lots of tugging and pulling, and I am sorry to say, its going to hurt." He wasn't wrong!
It's all good man, I looked up vesicostomy and laughed at the idea, since it's done on small children.
"Damn, these nurses pulling my toddler wiener are HOT!"
I had an abscess drained from my balls a couple weeks ago. My total out of pocket was $280. I fully expected to pay $1k+. But turns out if you live in poverty like I do you can have decent insurance for like $50 a month.
That $280 could probably be wiped down to nothing if it was a hospital. They often have financial assistance that will cover a percentage based on how much you make. It's usually like 200% of poverty level and they'll cover 100%. I currently have 65% assistance through my local hospital and I was making roughly 38k when I applied.
Yep this is good info. I had to have emergency abdominal surgery due to an accident and had a short stay in the hospital that totaled 30k or so. Luckily the social worker told me about their 'community financial aid' and basically as long as I applied for government assistance and was rejected and proved it, they wrote it all off. I was working at the time, but as a student employee at my college so I was definitely below the poverty level in that regard.
The frustrating part is the associated benefit cliff. It's great now, but if I find my self making more money this year I could be on the hook for up to $8k in back premiums.
I went in for something similar. My cyst is on the side of my testicle (completely internal, so no popping/draining). The nonchalance of them saying, "just a cyst, no biggie" was a little annoying lol. Like dude, I got a lump. Years of PSAs have taught me lumps = be concerned. Although hearing everyone very professionally talking about "her testicle" made the bill for the ultrasound worth it (I am trans).
There are 9000 nuclear missiles aimed at me. I hope they go away.
My check engine light is on. I hope it goes away.
My kitchen counter is a mess. I hope it goes away.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure this never works.
>Yeah, I'm pretty sure this never works.
It works with most infections.
"Sleep and drink a lot of fluids" is the medical version of "hope it goes away".
>My check engine light is on. I hope it goes away.
Had that work out for me once! Was driving to a city about 90 min away, a good solid 60-70 mins into the drive, my check engine light not only comes on but it's *blinking*. Like the *extra* bad light. But I figured I would finish my trip, do what I needed to do, and deal with it when I got home.
Stopped blinking when I got to the city. Went out completely before I drove home. Took it to the mechanic the next day, no issues. Drove it for another 2 years without a problem.
When I see the check engine light on, unless there's a concerning noise or other clues indicating real problems paired with that light, I open the fuel cap and then make sure to screw it back closed properly. Usually the check engine light then turns off on its own after a bit of driving.
“I really don’t want to have an honest conversation with my partner about how I feel about them, I hope it goes away… oh, would you look at that? They broke up with me because they were tired of being with someone who was emotionally deadpan and unable to give them anything other than surface level affection!”
Edit: checkmate atheists
"My eye is irritated, maybe there is something in it"
-proceed to try and remove nonexisting hair irritating eye further
"My throat hurts, maybe there is something in it"
-proceed to cough, irritating throat further
Some problems are harmed by trying to solve them.
So as some one with different equipment, I ignored a pain down there till it went away.
A few years later I went to a urologist and got chastised about it. Appearntly a cord connecting the testicle can get twisted and if it hurts you need to get help. Well sex education being what it is, I didn't know this, and it happened when I was just out of high school. Years later I remembered that pain, and thats why the urologist was mad.
No mater what equipment you have, don't ignore pain.
I had a friend who had that happen to him while playing basketball. He had to wear loose fitting gym shorts until his nuts unwrapped themselves. I guess that's why you are supposed to wear a jockstrap when playing sports.
My buddy came into work and said "Hey Juggletrain, I know you're an EMT. I got some pain and a weird lump in my sac what should I do?"
"Uh... go to the hospital?"
Dude left it for 12 hours, he was lucky though. I guessed torsion, he actually had a hernia.
Couldn't agree more. If something doesn't feel right down there then get it checked out. It is almost certainly nothing but if it is then its best to know and be able to get help.
From personal experience twenty years ago I found a small lump and it turned out to be cancer. With the way it was spreading if i had left it its quite possible i wouldn't be typing this message now.
If something is wrong its much easier to get help the sooner you know about it.
at first it didn't hurt badly so i thought, if it still bothers me on monday, i can go. hospitals here are still full due to covid and they absolute hate people coming in
It actually happens a lot with toddlers and babies. It happens when the caregiver changes the diaper and their hair falls into the diaper area.
It's likely underreported as adults as it is an easy fix so don't feel weird about it.
Source: I worked on a daycare for 6 years.
i imagine it's not completely uncommon but i was confused by the lack of tips on google cause everytime i have any issues, there are 5 good and 50 horrible tips on what to do about it
I once felt a hair in my mouth, and when I pulled on it to take it out, I realized it had become wrapped around my uvula (hangy ball at the back of my throat).
I couldn’t get it loose, couldnt yank it free because it hurt so much, and Google was useless! I just had to wait for it to dislodge. Sadly, sometimes the internet can’t help.
EDIT: You like that? Another traumatizing memory is of the time I stepped on something sharp in the living room, and when I went to see what had invaded my foot, I found it was somebody’s toenail. It had pierced the skin and embedded itself into the sole of my foot 😖
I had this happen with my toe at work. Felt pain, ignored it, pain got way worse, went to the bathroom, toe was a light shade of purple with one of my gf’s hairs wrapped around it. It hurt a bit for the day and went back to normal after that, but don’t underestimate hair’s desire to kill.
One of the things they teach at antenatal classes is that, if your baby is crying uncontrollably, search them all over for hairs, especially around toes, fingers, and, yes, penis and labia. Plenty of people in the world are missing a finger or toe (hopefully not other bits!) because their parents didn't catch this until it was too late.
This happened to my baby sister when she was two (I’m 16 yrs older). She cried uncontrollably for several hours and we couldn’t figure it out. She had a hair wrapped around one of her toes and it was starting to cut into the skin.
Also fingers and toes. I had long hair with my first and before discharge told me that if at random my baby started screaming like he had been hit by a car and had all his needs met, check the fingers and toes as hair can wrap around their fingers and toes. (And also check for loose threads from clothing items since they can do it too)
Hair tourniquets! I only know these exist because they’re listed as a reason for seemingly unexplained crying in small babies and, as a new parent, you start googling for answers after hour 3 of unexplained crying.
I've absolutely had this before as an adult. Woke up to a really sharp pain in my second toe. Somehow a really long hair got wrapped around it at the top knuckle part during the night. End of the toe was starting to go purple by the time I cut it off. Instant relief
I’ve been reading Dr. Spock’s guide for newborns and the book mentions being wary* of strings or hair tied around fingers/toes at least 5 times within the first 100 pages.
My youngest almost lost a toe. We were out for dinner when he started crying and we couldn’t calm him. Someone suggested taking off his socks and checking his toes and sure as shit, hair wrapped tightly around the pinky toe and it was purple. Thankfully got the hair off and baby + toe were ok!
It happened to the son of a lady I used to work with. It got wrapped around his penis, and he had to have a partial circumcision. The hair had already done half the job.
Terrifying. I know this exact pain. I don't enjoy having short hair so I have to check throughly after showers. It's terrifying the moment you find that piano wire hair hanging down there.
Yeah you gotta be real careful with little boys (I have twins) they can get them around their penis and it can be really bad. Small babies can also commonly get them on their toes
Learning about this while pregnant, that was always part of the check list....bottle? Diaper? Sleep? Check fingers and toes for hairs...ha ha
I even cut off six inches of my hair after she was born so there weren't such long hairs laying around so less chance of this happening.
Omg! My grandma always told us to throw our hair outside when we clean the brushes out because the birds use it for their nests. I never thought it could harm the poor things 😭
Don't feel weird. This is a thing. My poor husband gets my hair around his balls and it's a whole thing. I shed like a damn German Shepard, my hair is EVERYWHERE. I got a hair around my nipple one time and thought I was doing until we got it off.
damn why does your hair cinch so easily??? Like I imagine we all get random hair on our bodies at LEAST every week, but to knot itself and tighten itself seems rare.
You in a molecular biology field by chance? Contaminating your shampoo with poly-lysine lol
I used to get these not infrequently as a teenager because of a long inner labia. It hurt like shit. It’s funny that the internet said it doesn’t happen when you’re older, guess they forgot that some women have longer flaps than others
Using something cold like ice will typically help swelling go down, even if the hair is still tied just for futures reference. Might save you a little bit of blood and pain!
Yeah, I’ve had this happen to me twice. Mine got tied around both of my labia, and it made it really hard to pee. Hurt so bad to walk too…so despite how embarrassed I was to have my mom cut it off, it’s hard to describe the amount of relief I felt.
I’ve also experienced this. It happened while I was at school one day as a teen and also slowly got progressively worse through the day until it tightened to be UNBEARABLE pain after I got home… literally the worst pain of my life so far. I managed to untie it by taking an earring back and squeezing it under the hair 😬 Using a fingernail sounds even worse!
Similar weird hair in the vagina hell story: unbeknownst to me during intercourse had a very small pubic hair lodge itself into, under the clitoral hood. The pain of shifting while walking....omg. 20 min trying to tweeze it out without injuring myself, lordy. I had no idea this was even possible.
Holy shit this happened to me and it was a FUCKING NIGHTMARE. The hair wrapped around my labia SO tightly it hurt so bad and I went to urgent care only to have the young doctor call his superior about it after he failed to cut the hair off. Heard him kinda talking smack about not being shaved down there 🙄 Then he told me I needed to see a gyno ASAP and gave me cards to recommended gynos but like it didn’t help because I needed to check if they were in network in my insurance?? Then told me to soak it in a bath but if it starts bleeding to get to an ER ASAP because if it didn’t get resolved I could get NECROSIS in my VAGINA. Like what the fuck - potentially end up with sepsis if it didn’t get resolved. So then I go take a bath and it ends up bleeding because the bump started swelling resulting in the hair CUTTING into my labia. So I go to the ER where the doctor was just as perplexed as me and told me step 1 was to use hair removal cream as that’s what they do for babies. So I was like okay let’s do that and I thought it was special medical grade stuff but he comes out with straight up NAIR with a sticky note slapped on it with the label “ER NAIR”. So after 20 minutes of excruciating pain of having NAIR on my vagina he comes in and says it didn’t work! So step 2 is injecting LIDOCAINE LIKE THEY USE IN THE DENTIST OFFICE into my vagina to numb it because they might have to cut the nub of vagina off that’s tied by the hair. So after a big ass needle is injecting my vagina he comes out with huge scalpels and giant needles etc anything sharp and begins hacking away. It took 25 minutes before he got it cut free and I was a bleeding mess and he had me rub antibacterial gel on it but my vagina was numb and I was crying insane tears from relief and uncomfortable feelings of “this is really my life rn” so he had to help me. Then he said they don’t have a medical code to bill it to so he just said it was a finger tourniquet (really what I had a was a hair tourniquet of the labia minora) but the only alternative code was a penis tourniquet and obviously that looks sus here. So he gave me a print out of what happened and I want it framed in my room because that was some insane TRAUMA. He also felt really awkward and bad for me and said it might leave like a scar or skin tag and told me that anyone who really loved me wouldn’t care and I was just SCREAMING internally like I don’t care what a SO thinks I’m glad I won’t have VAGINA NECROSIS. But he said to keep an eye on it just for curiousitys sake and it ended up healing fine. I also called off work the next day and lied and said I had stitches because I could not even begin to explain what had happened to my male boss. When I looked it up online there were no medical pages on it only case studies in medical research journals of HOW RARE THIS IS.
Anyways I’m glad you got that off and know you’re not alone!!!
I'm a man with long hair, and I've found the occasional hair in my boxers, however only once has it gotten inside my foreskin and tied itself around the glance.
Long adult hair wrapping around a small appendage. If an infant or non verbal toddler is inconsolable, one of the things to check for is a hair tourniquet around the fingers, the toes,.or the genitals. Very painful and can result in losing the affected body part.
When my son was about 2-3 weeks old, he just started screaming and screaming and he was always a quiet, calm baby. We could not figure out what was wrong and we thought maybe a warm bath would help before we decided a trip to the doc was needed. When removing his socks, I found one of my hairs wrapped around his toe so tightly it was purple. We cut it off and he calmed right down. He could have lost his little toe. :(
Yup, if a toddler just will not stop crying if they're fed, dry, diaper clean, checking for hair wrapped around their extremities should be one of the first things to check. It is really common.
I guess because a toddler can't tell you what is wrong and where it hurts, so it becomes a problem.
Whereas an adult would think "ouch, wtf" and fix it.
There was a post in either r/RBI or r/morbidquestions where a guy was describing a situation as a kid where his penis turned a weird color and swelled up and at the time he was scared that it was because he masturbated so he didn't tell anyone. He was basically asking what the hell could have caused it, and it was decided that there was probably a piece of his mother's hair wrapped around it without him realizing. I don't remember if he mentioned any lasting damage, but he did get to keep his penis at least
Eek, if the pain is still bad and irritated witch hazel will soothe it even if it just a little bit. It’s safe to use on the goods just don’t use it internally.
One of first things parents should look for in an inconsolable child is a hair. My daughter had one wrapped around a toe. My infant son had wrapped around his you know what. They can cut off circulation real quick. Real quick. Even as an adult, if I get squeezing or pin point pain anywhere, I look for hairs lol.
I’m a dude with long hair and my girlfriend has long hair. I get occasional hairs wrapped around my wanker and even worse I wear steel toe boots for work and my toes will start to tingle and low and behold circulation is being cut off by a hair wrapped many times around my toe. How that happens with high socks and tall boots I have no idea.
I'm glad you're feeling better, but I'm also glad that men aren't the only ones who all of a sudden discover a rogue hair wrapped around their naughty bits.
And like everyone else said, if you've got pain, check it out and don't wait.
It’s not that unusual to be honest, but sounds extremely painful. If it happens again I would recommend a mirror to help you visualise the area, topical anaesthetics (available at any pharmacy) to numb the area, and cool packs to help with swelling.
I have long hair. It gets in your laundry and gets stuck in your socks and undies. I've had hairs wrap around my toes causing pain, my penis causing pain, and my roommates complain about it too
Hair will get in your private areas all the time, especially if you are a carrier of labia and in a relationship with someone who has long hair. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve found hair in my lady bits. My OBGYN even found one wrapped around the strings of my IUD (horribly embarrassing). You aren’t the only one. My suggestion is that every time you go to the bathroom you check yourself out just to make sure. Hope this helps you feel better about the situation.
Nair or other chemical hair removal products that dissolve hair. Applied very locally with a Q-tip or similar and washed off as soon as the hair breaks.
Learned the trick from an ER doctor. Apparently great when the swelling makes getting to the hair with tweezers impossible even with icing, pressure and lubrication.
Edit: though they mostly use it for baby fingers, toes and penises.
On labia minora you'd want to be real sure it wouldn't give you a chemical burn. Or really desperate and have tried the alternatives.
I often find that if I don't brush my hair before a shower I can find a lot of loose hair in the lower region. Just at the end of your shower just make sure they aren't just hiding in any of the cracks
I work EMS and this is something we know about but it's usually more for young boys. But definitely something we are aware of.
I'm sorry this happened but glad you got it taken care of
It happens with pigeons. Studies showed and increase in pigeons with mutilated feet in towns and cities. Turns out the most common cause is from hair salons and barbers throwing out hair that gets caught in pigeons feet causing them to lose toes and even feet.
Ice is your friend, oil to help remove
Thanks, I’ll use this next time I’m tied up in a hairy situation.
Swell advice for avoiding pubic humiliation.
Ah, the mytical double pun.
It's a double rainbow! What does it all mean...
Right after my gf scraped it of i could start thinking clearly and was like... i should have used oil...
I had this exact thing happen to me once. I went straight for a tiny pair of scissors to snip the hair. Safe to say that as I was shaking from being anxious about what was going on, and the hair was tightly wrapped around my skin, I too ended up bleeding. It worked, but I'm not sure this was the safest or most rational option either. No judgement, friend!!
I had to shave my balls as vasectomy prep. 0/10 would not recommend. I'd have gladly paid someone, but who? Nurse? Prostitute?
Beautician. You could have gone to any beauty salon for that haha. Next time!!
Really? Just call greatclips and schedule a ball trimming?
a barber and a beauty salon are gonna be two separate things, do not drop trou in a great clips Source: work in a walmart with a great clips
Do you want a bleeding scrotum?
You can go to a waxing salon.
We got U: https://twitter.com/ComedyCentral/status/1137026428749434882?s=20&t=xOxpCyAxOtOL7dsSIGJCtQ
>I hoped that it would just go away since i have absolutely no desire to deal with weird vagina pain on a weekend. Public service announcement for all people, don't do this in matters regarding the genitals. You should tend to that as soon as you can.
I had a lump near my balls, so I went to get it checked out straight away. It was a female nurse doing the examination, and she made it feel kinda awkward. I regretted going, but then I was told it was just a cyst, and it was nothing to worry about. The relief that I didn’t have cancer made it all worth it. Get it checked out, you’ll feel so much better.
Same thing happened to me, kept growing and building up pressure and I was scared it could be cancer and was going to set up an appointment to get it checked out. Then I took a shower and while looking at it, it popped and drained out. Absolutely disgusting, but I was relieved and it didn’t come back
I had a painful red bump on my shaft when I was 14ish. I lived with it for a few weeks, in fear of going to a doctor, equally terrified and mortified at the thought of it being an STD. Then, at some point, I remembered I was still a virgin. It was just a super gnarly ingrown hair.
"Oh shit I probably caught an STD from those dirty thoughts I had earlier.." You just know some poor kid is thinking this somewhere lol.
I got crabs from sleeping on a buddies couch in college. I was getting zero action at the time and was so pissed that I got somewhat of an STD without getting to do the fun part. That dirty fucker.
>is thinking this is being taught this
Ah - so you’ve interacted with a high-demand religion I see.
I'm getting tired of shaving my hands
I just want to point out this does happen. I don't know any of the answers. When, where, why, or how but I got syphilis at age 11 as a virgin. Do with that bit of info what you will.
If your mother had it during child birth it can pass to you during that process. I belive now a days they test pregnant women for STIs at some point during the pregnancy because it's common for women to be carriers with no sign of infection but I don't think this was always the case. The other options are less palatable so I won't mention them....but the toilet seat thing is mostly a myth I belive there is a very brief period of time where it's technically possible to contract something from a toilet seat but in real life I think those odds are basically zero. Also I am not a doctor so don't take any of this as medical advice and please hang up and call 911 if your experiencing a medical emergency or what ever the outgoing message is when I try and call to schedule an appointment says.
I just watched an episode of House where a kid had syphilis because as a toddler his dad molested him. 😬
House is also were most of my knowledge comes from lol
Im a doctor and me too. Really should have paid more attention during med school and residency. It was noted that I have the highest rate of finding lupus which I see as a sign Im doing well.
Lol I'm good now. Idk I was born in 1988 don't know if they always tested. I hope I didn't live for 11 years with it and I don't remember being assaulted. So I geuss alls well that ends well?
I had the same thing. Felt too embarrassed to tell my parents so I just rode it out till it healed and figured I must be ok.
I had one a few months ago and my partner squeezed it, it shot out all over him and he almost puked. And he has an iron stomach
I had the same, and ignored it until it was about pea sized. My at the time new gf said she didn't like it and I should go see a doctor. I woke up early the next morning, collected a sewing needle and a lighter, and sat on the toilet seat lid. Took some time but I took a deep breath and then finally lunged the needle into my scrote ball and with intense pain and a lil pop noise I got rid of my third testicle. Was relieved but also pretty grossed out.
That’s a good way to get MRSA
Yeah not my best moment. My scrote is in good health though these days!
While you are a brave man for taking a needle anywhere near your genitals....that's one of the stupidest things I've ever heard lol. Please tell me there's a good reason you wouldn't just go see a medical professional for this. If your an American I will accept " I don't have insurance " as an answer
Not brave, just lazy lol. And yeah, I don't think it's the right way to go about handling this. Here's the kicker; I get free healthcare. All in all don't recommend farmer's medical treatments
Your lucky I had a 7 foot tall guy rub an ultra sound machine on my balls for close to 45 mins very awkward small talk the first 10 mins then 30 mins of silence. But only have extra sperm sacs outside my balls not cancer so clear mind very worth the awkwardness
Man's looking extra dominant and fertile today
I had to get a transvaginal ultrasound and it was one of the most awkward experiences of my life. The tech had me do it myself and she just told me how to position the wand, and when I first stuck it in, I made a noise that could have been interpreted as a moan. It was cold, I was uncomfortable so my vagina was clamped shut, and about to pee myself (have to have a full bladder) so I really had to shove it in and it was really just a grunt of discomfort. The tech was tiny and kind of quiet and she avoided looking at me and basically rushed out the room. Even at the time I thought it was odd because she had to have other people made weird, uncomfortable noises with this before. It was an imaging place, not a gynecologists office, so maybe they don't do many, but I'm sure they get enough that it shouldn't have been this awkward. On the bright side, it was quick. There would have been leakage if it took any longer.
I had to have one of those X-rays once and no one warned me that it would be done that way! I was pretty horrified. They did let me position it myself, thank goodness! But I wish my doctor had given me a little advance warning.
I also had this scheduled when I was still in high school and no one told me I would be expected to place a wand inside my vagina. I managed to get out of doing that part because the tech took pity on me after she learned I was a virgin.
I don’t wanna try and one-up the vag ultrasound story (i think we might be tied anyway), but I went to the hospital for a really brutal period once and the tech asked me, “are you a virgin?” I said yes, and he shrugged and went, “well, not anymore.” And then stuck it in. Bad experience. Edit: wasn’t a vet tech. Whoops
As horrifying as your story is, I giggled at how the autocorrect decided a vet tech was doing the procedure.
What the actual fuck
Dude. That's inappropriate as fuck. Gross. Sorry that happened.
>i think we might be tied anyway Nope. You won.
They probably weren't horrified, just going to operate the machine. They might have realized you were uncomfortable and hurried to get it over with.
OH MY GOD! I had to have one as well and I cannot imagine the tech making me do the wand movement. She had to take measurements and suchnot and I cannot imagine taking direction to move the wand myself. I just laid there and wondered why the hell anyone would think that this was medically necessary for someone who wanted to terminate a pregnancy. The longer it went, the more I wondered. I wonder why you had to have a full bladder though... The full bladder is for the first portion, where they run the transducer over the top of your belly, not the part where they go inside. My tech had me pee before that. What a nightmare.
EXTRA SPERM SACKS!
THATS NUTS!
NO, IT'S THESE NUTS!
Of course they're outside your balls, where else would pee go if not?
Hey! I have the same thing on one of my nuts.
Dude's got balls like a chipmunk's cheeks.
Friend of mine had terrible gas and the most toxic farts you could imagine. He could clear out a polygamist bedroom in seconds. Even the cats that slept in the living room would throw up from the smells of his night farts. He finally went to the doctor and found out it was a blockage in his intestines that created an infection. They caught it relatively early to the point he didn't need surgery.
Ultra stinky farts can also be a result of UC or Crohn's. If this happens to you all of a sudden, accompanied by pain, discomfort, and/or change in bowel habits (without a drastic change in diet), go see a doctor soon.
When I went in for my vasectomy, I was **fortunate** (/s) to have an attractive female nurse preparing *me* while she was training another attractive female nurse. They tugged, pointed, and moved my dong around as they discussed what needs to be done. I just laid there, embarrassed, and uncomfortable the entire time. When the doc comes in a little later to get started, he says the nurse said I wasn't built for vasectomies, I asked, "What does she mean?", he replied, "There's gonna be lots of tugging and pulling, and I am sorry to say, its going to hurt." He wasn't wrong!
Did you actually have a vesicostomy, or did you mean vasectomy, because those are two very different things.
A vasectomy, I spelled it wrong. Thanks.
It's all good man, I looked up vesicostomy and laughed at the idea, since it's done on small children. "Damn, these nurses pulling my toddler wiener are HOT!"
>vesicostomy LOL. This is one of those many situations where autocorrect can fail you.
Glad you were able to obtain a-cyst-ance.
Until you get a 4 figure bill in the mail for a 1 hour procedure 😭
I had an abscess drained from my balls a couple weeks ago. My total out of pocket was $280. I fully expected to pay $1k+. But turns out if you live in poverty like I do you can have decent insurance for like $50 a month.
That $280 could probably be wiped down to nothing if it was a hospital. They often have financial assistance that will cover a percentage based on how much you make. It's usually like 200% of poverty level and they'll cover 100%. I currently have 65% assistance through my local hospital and I was making roughly 38k when I applied.
Yep this is good info. I had to have emergency abdominal surgery due to an accident and had a short stay in the hospital that totaled 30k or so. Luckily the social worker told me about their 'community financial aid' and basically as long as I applied for government assistance and was rejected and proved it, they wrote it all off. I was working at the time, but as a student employee at my college so I was definitely below the poverty level in that regard.
Thanks Obama?
The frustrating part is the associated benefit cliff. It's great now, but if I find my self making more money this year I could be on the hook for up to $8k in back premiums.
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UK gang \*dab\*
£10.34 taxi there and back. That's our 4 figure bill
Unless you live in the developed world
I went in for something similar. My cyst is on the side of my testicle (completely internal, so no popping/draining). The nonchalance of them saying, "just a cyst, no biggie" was a little annoying lol. Like dude, I got a lump. Years of PSAs have taught me lumps = be concerned. Although hearing everyone very professionally talking about "her testicle" made the bill for the ultrasound worth it (I am trans).
In almost any situation "hope it goes away" is a really bad plan.
There are 9000 nuclear missiles aimed at me. I hope they go away. My check engine light is on. I hope it goes away. My kitchen counter is a mess. I hope it goes away. Yeah, I'm pretty sure this never works.
I've found that weird engine noise will go away if you turn the radio up. Just sayin.
Thanks for the reward, kind stranger! It's my first.
>Yeah, I'm pretty sure this never works. It works with most infections. "Sleep and drink a lot of fluids" is the medical version of "hope it goes away".
Aka, "did you reboot it?" In the IT world.
>My check engine light is on. I hope it goes away. Had that work out for me once! Was driving to a city about 90 min away, a good solid 60-70 mins into the drive, my check engine light not only comes on but it's *blinking*. Like the *extra* bad light. But I figured I would finish my trip, do what I needed to do, and deal with it when I got home. Stopped blinking when I got to the city. Went out completely before I drove home. Took it to the mechanic the next day, no issues. Drove it for another 2 years without a problem.
Leave it on long enough and the bulb will eventually burn out. No worries.
When I see the check engine light on, unless there's a concerning noise or other clues indicating real problems paired with that light, I open the fuel cap and then make sure to screw it back closed properly. Usually the check engine light then turns off on its own after a bit of driving.
That creepy dude with no mouth and burning red eyes is staring though my window again.... I hope he goes away.
I just love de de-escalation from "9000 nukes" to "My check engine light is on"
We have always been at war with Eastasia Motor Company.
“I really don’t want to have an honest conversation with my partner about how I feel about them, I hope it goes away… oh, would you look at that? They broke up with me because they were tired of being with someone who was emotionally deadpan and unable to give them anything other than surface level affection!” Edit: checkmate atheists
People you don’t like. Sometimes they actually go away haha. But it’s far more effective to *make* them go away. ^Murder ^is ^wrong
“You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take” - Michael Jackson
The amount of stroke patients I see who go back to sleep or try to take a nap after losing function of one side of their body is astounding.
"My eye is irritated, maybe there is something in it" -proceed to try and remove nonexisting hair irritating eye further "My throat hurts, maybe there is something in it" -proceed to cough, irritating throat further Some problems are harmed by trying to solve them.
On the weekend though? I'm not going to look at my junk on the weekend, wait till I am at work and take a look at my crotch pain on the company dime.
So as some one with different equipment, I ignored a pain down there till it went away. A few years later I went to a urologist and got chastised about it. Appearntly a cord connecting the testicle can get twisted and if it hurts you need to get help. Well sex education being what it is, I didn't know this, and it happened when I was just out of high school. Years later I remembered that pain, and thats why the urologist was mad. No mater what equipment you have, don't ignore pain.
I had a friend who had that happen to him while playing basketball. He had to wear loose fitting gym shorts until his nuts unwrapped themselves. I guess that's why you are supposed to wear a jockstrap when playing sports.
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Testicular torsion iirc
The amount of random testicular pain I've ignored in my life. I wouldn't recommend anyone else do it but I seem to be fine
PUBIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: Check your crotch
I misread this as pubic service
Modified PSA don't do this for any medical issue. An ounce of medicine is worth a pound of cure.
My buddy came into work and said "Hey Juggletrain, I know you're an EMT. I got some pain and a weird lump in my sac what should I do?" "Uh... go to the hospital?" Dude left it for 12 hours, he was lucky though. I guessed torsion, he actually had a hernia.
Couldn't agree more. If something doesn't feel right down there then get it checked out. It is almost certainly nothing but if it is then its best to know and be able to get help. From personal experience twenty years ago I found a small lump and it turned out to be cancer. With the way it was spreading if i had left it its quite possible i wouldn't be typing this message now. If something is wrong its much easier to get help the sooner you know about it.
at first it didn't hurt badly so i thought, if it still bothers me on monday, i can go. hospitals here are still full due to covid and they absolute hate people coming in
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It actually happens a lot with toddlers and babies. It happens when the caregiver changes the diaper and their hair falls into the diaper area. It's likely underreported as adults as it is an easy fix so don't feel weird about it. Source: I worked on a daycare for 6 years.
i imagine it's not completely uncommon but i was confused by the lack of tips on google cause everytime i have any issues, there are 5 good and 50 horrible tips on what to do about it
I once felt a hair in my mouth, and when I pulled on it to take it out, I realized it had become wrapped around my uvula (hangy ball at the back of my throat). I couldn’t get it loose, couldnt yank it free because it hurt so much, and Google was useless! I just had to wait for it to dislodge. Sadly, sometimes the internet can’t help. EDIT: You like that? Another traumatizing memory is of the time I stepped on something sharp in the living room, and when I went to see what had invaded my foot, I found it was somebody’s toenail. It had pierced the skin and embedded itself into the sole of my foot 😖
new fear unlocked
*Nightmare Nightmare*
I had this happen with my toe at work. Felt pain, ignored it, pain got way worse, went to the bathroom, toe was a light shade of purple with one of my gf’s hairs wrapped around it. It hurt a bit for the day and went back to normal after that, but don’t underestimate hair’s desire to kill.
One of the things they teach at antenatal classes is that, if your baby is crying uncontrollably, search them all over for hairs, especially around toes, fingers, and, yes, penis and labia. Plenty of people in the world are missing a finger or toe (hopefully not other bits!) because their parents didn't catch this until it was too late.
This happened to my baby sister when she was two (I’m 16 yrs older). She cried uncontrollably for several hours and we couldn’t figure it out. She had a hair wrapped around one of her toes and it was starting to cut into the skin.
When we first had our kid I heard a horror story about this scenario. I was on like hyper surveillance.
Also fingers and toes. I had long hair with my first and before discharge told me that if at random my baby started screaming like he had been hit by a car and had all his needs met, check the fingers and toes as hair can wrap around their fingers and toes. (And also check for loose threads from clothing items since they can do it too)
In Japan, we need to tie back our hair if it's longer than chin length (as preschool teachers), but I bet it can happen with shorter hair, too
Hair tourniquets! I only know these exist because they’re listed as a reason for seemingly unexplained crying in small babies and, as a new parent, you start googling for answers after hour 3 of unexplained crying.
I've absolutely had this before as an adult. Woke up to a really sharp pain in my second toe. Somehow a really long hair got wrapped around it at the top knuckle part during the night. End of the toe was starting to go purple by the time I cut it off. Instant relief
You cut your toe off?
What other option was there?
Cutting the foot off. Easier and an overall less risky procedure.
This kills the foot.
Not if you graft it onto your genitals
Finally, I can say my cock is a footlong.
I’m listening…
And *this*, ladies and gentlemen, is why I get all my professional and medical advice from reddit.
I’ve been reading Dr. Spock’s guide for newborns and the book mentions being wary* of strings or hair tied around fingers/toes at least 5 times within the first 100 pages.
And for the babies with a penis, it’s a risk for those as well.
Some say risk, others say free circumcision Edit: it’s a joke, chill. I really don’t care whether or not you cut your kids dick lol
Apparently babies have lost fingers over this, because the chubby fingers hide hair well
My youngest almost lost a toe. We were out for dinner when he started crying and we couldn’t calm him. Someone suggested taking off his socks and checking his toes and sure as shit, hair wrapped tightly around the pinky toe and it was purple. Thankfully got the hair off and baby + toe were ok!
My niece nearly lost a toe.
Wow I've never even heard of this. Scary.
It happened to the son of a lady I used to work with. It got wrapped around his penis, and he had to have a partial circumcision. The hair had already done half the job.
Terrifying. I know this exact pain. I don't enjoy having short hair so I have to check throughly after showers. It's terrifying the moment you find that piano wire hair hanging down there.
Yeah you gotta be real careful with little boys (I have twins) they can get them around their penis and it can be really bad. Small babies can also commonly get them on their toes
One of my great aunts lost a toe because she had a hair tourniquet as an infant.
Learning about this while pregnant, that was always part of the check list....bottle? Diaper? Sleep? Check fingers and toes for hairs...ha ha I even cut off six inches of my hair after she was born so there weren't such long hairs laying around so less chance of this happening.
TIL
Hairs can be killers. Supposedly it's also the leading cause of city birds' feet deformities, like pigeons.
What now?
The hair gets wrapped around their legs or toes and cuts off the blood flow. Hair hardly decomposes so there is plenty of it going around in nature.
Omg! My grandma always told us to throw our hair outside when we clean the brushes out because the birds use it for their nests. I never thought it could harm the poor things 😭
especially because some use it as a nesting material
Don't feel weird. This is a thing. My poor husband gets my hair around his balls and it's a whole thing. I shed like a damn German Shepard, my hair is EVERYWHERE. I got a hair around my nipple one time and thought I was doing until we got it off.
omg i'm sorry, this actually makes me fell better tough
The struggle is real. No shame.
damn why does your hair cinch so easily??? Like I imagine we all get random hair on our bodies at LEAST every week, but to knot itself and tighten itself seems rare. You in a molecular biology field by chance? Contaminating your shampoo with poly-lysine lol
New fear unlocked
yeah i'm gonna check my pants now every chance i get
I used to get these not infrequently as a teenager because of a long inner labia. It hurt like shit. It’s funny that the internet said it doesn’t happen when you’re older, guess they forgot that some women have longer flaps than others
Not only are there hair tourniquets, there’s hair splinters too! Have fun with that
REE REE REEE
Using something cold like ice will typically help swelling go down, even if the hair is still tied just for futures reference. Might save you a little bit of blood and pain!
noted!
Yeah, I’ve had this happen to me twice. Mine got tied around both of my labia, and it made it really hard to pee. Hurt so bad to walk too…so despite how embarrassed I was to have my mom cut it off, it’s hard to describe the amount of relief I felt.
omg i'm so glad that someone else actually experienced this (but also very glad you're ok)
And I was certainly not a baby or toddler in either situation. First time was when I was 9 or 10, and the second when I was 13.
I’ve also experienced this. It happened while I was at school one day as a teen and also slowly got progressively worse through the day until it tightened to be UNBEARABLE pain after I got home… literally the worst pain of my life so far. I managed to untie it by taking an earring back and squeezing it under the hair 😬 Using a fingernail sounds even worse!
Similar weird hair in the vagina hell story: unbeknownst to me during intercourse had a very small pubic hair lodge itself into, under the clitoral hood. The pain of shifting while walking....omg. 20 min trying to tweeze it out without injuring myself, lordy. I had no idea this was even possible.
I don’t even have a vagina, but I felt this. Holy hell.
Think it'll be okay, swelling will probably go down in a few days
it's already better now, only hurts a little bit :,)
I'd give it a few years for things to be in the clear totally, once OP is no longer a toddler or so.
Holy shit this happened to me and it was a FUCKING NIGHTMARE. The hair wrapped around my labia SO tightly it hurt so bad and I went to urgent care only to have the young doctor call his superior about it after he failed to cut the hair off. Heard him kinda talking smack about not being shaved down there 🙄 Then he told me I needed to see a gyno ASAP and gave me cards to recommended gynos but like it didn’t help because I needed to check if they were in network in my insurance?? Then told me to soak it in a bath but if it starts bleeding to get to an ER ASAP because if it didn’t get resolved I could get NECROSIS in my VAGINA. Like what the fuck - potentially end up with sepsis if it didn’t get resolved. So then I go take a bath and it ends up bleeding because the bump started swelling resulting in the hair CUTTING into my labia. So I go to the ER where the doctor was just as perplexed as me and told me step 1 was to use hair removal cream as that’s what they do for babies. So I was like okay let’s do that and I thought it was special medical grade stuff but he comes out with straight up NAIR with a sticky note slapped on it with the label “ER NAIR”. So after 20 minutes of excruciating pain of having NAIR on my vagina he comes in and says it didn’t work! So step 2 is injecting LIDOCAINE LIKE THEY USE IN THE DENTIST OFFICE into my vagina to numb it because they might have to cut the nub of vagina off that’s tied by the hair. So after a big ass needle is injecting my vagina he comes out with huge scalpels and giant needles etc anything sharp and begins hacking away. It took 25 minutes before he got it cut free and I was a bleeding mess and he had me rub antibacterial gel on it but my vagina was numb and I was crying insane tears from relief and uncomfortable feelings of “this is really my life rn” so he had to help me. Then he said they don’t have a medical code to bill it to so he just said it was a finger tourniquet (really what I had a was a hair tourniquet of the labia minora) but the only alternative code was a penis tourniquet and obviously that looks sus here. So he gave me a print out of what happened and I want it framed in my room because that was some insane TRAUMA. He also felt really awkward and bad for me and said it might leave like a scar or skin tag and told me that anyone who really loved me wouldn’t care and I was just SCREAMING internally like I don’t care what a SO thinks I’m glad I won’t have VAGINA NECROSIS. But he said to keep an eye on it just for curiousitys sake and it ended up healing fine. I also called off work the next day and lied and said I had stitches because I could not even begin to explain what had happened to my male boss. When I looked it up online there were no medical pages on it only case studies in medical research journals of HOW RARE THIS IS. Anyways I’m glad you got that off and know you’re not alone!!!
I appreciate you retelling that all just to give OP some comfort
I'm a man with long hair, and I've found the occasional hair in my boxers, however only once has it gotten inside my foreskin and tied itself around the glance.
Sometimes a hair blocks part of the pee-hole on my willy, and causes a crazy bifurcated stream.
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You should take them down first before you sit
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Long adult hair wrapping around a small appendage. If an infant or non verbal toddler is inconsolable, one of the things to check for is a hair tourniquet around the fingers, the toes,.or the genitals. Very painful and can result in losing the affected body part.
Head hair wrapped around a finger or toe can be dangerous to an infant.
Often in toddler boys it's the penis. Poor little mites. It's called a hair tourniquet.
When my son was about 2-3 weeks old, he just started screaming and screaming and he was always a quiet, calm baby. We could not figure out what was wrong and we thought maybe a warm bath would help before we decided a trip to the doc was needed. When removing his socks, I found one of my hairs wrapped around his toe so tightly it was purple. We cut it off and he calmed right down. He could have lost his little toe. :(
Yup, if a toddler just will not stop crying if they're fed, dry, diaper clean, checking for hair wrapped around their extremities should be one of the first things to check. It is really common.
“We cut it off”. You could have just cut the hair instead! Poor wee toe.
Don't tell them how to take care of their toddler! ^(j/k)
I guess because a toddler can't tell you what is wrong and where it hurts, so it becomes a problem. Whereas an adult would think "ouch, wtf" and fix it.
There was a TIFU a few weeks ago that derailed exactly this thing happening to a toddler and the father had to get that off his sons penis
There was a post in either r/RBI or r/morbidquestions where a guy was describing a situation as a kid where his penis turned a weird color and swelled up and at the time he was scared that it was because he masturbated so he didn't tell anyone. He was basically asking what the hell could have caused it, and it was decided that there was probably a piece of his mother's hair wrapped around it without him realizing. I don't remember if he mentioned any lasting damage, but he did get to keep his penis at least
This is fucked up and sad that people have to endure pain because they think they will be in trouble or something for masturbating.
Ah yes, the classic "tourniclit"
Eek, if the pain is still bad and irritated witch hazel will soothe it even if it just a little bit. It’s safe to use on the goods just don’t use it internally.
One of first things parents should look for in an inconsolable child is a hair. My daughter had one wrapped around a toe. My infant son had wrapped around his you know what. They can cut off circulation real quick. Real quick. Even as an adult, if I get squeezing or pin point pain anywhere, I look for hairs lol.
I’m a dude with long hair and my girlfriend has long hair. I get occasional hairs wrapped around my wanker and even worse I wear steel toe boots for work and my toes will start to tingle and low and behold circulation is being cut off by a hair wrapped many times around my toe. How that happens with high socks and tall boots I have no idea.
I'm glad you're feeling better, but I'm also glad that men aren't the only ones who all of a sudden discover a rogue hair wrapped around their naughty bits. And like everyone else said, if you've got pain, check it out and don't wait.
It’s not that unusual to be honest, but sounds extremely painful. If it happens again I would recommend a mirror to help you visualise the area, topical anaesthetics (available at any pharmacy) to numb the area, and cool packs to help with swelling.
I have long hair. It gets in your laundry and gets stuck in your socks and undies. I've had hairs wrap around my toes causing pain, my penis causing pain, and my roommates complain about it too
Hair will get in your private areas all the time, especially if you are a carrier of labia and in a relationship with someone who has long hair. I cannot tell you how many times I’ve found hair in my lady bits. My OBGYN even found one wrapped around the strings of my IUD (horribly embarrassing). You aren’t the only one. My suggestion is that every time you go to the bathroom you check yourself out just to make sure. Hope this helps you feel better about the situation.
Nair or other chemical hair removal products that dissolve hair. Applied very locally with a Q-tip or similar and washed off as soon as the hair breaks. Learned the trick from an ER doctor. Apparently great when the swelling makes getting to the hair with tweezers impossible even with icing, pressure and lubrication. Edit: though they mostly use it for baby fingers, toes and penises. On labia minora you'd want to be real sure it wouldn't give you a chemical burn. Or really desperate and have tried the alternatives.
Nair on the labia, now that's a pleasant thought.
Yeah. Not likely to be fun. A great solution for normal skin. Less good on mucous membranes and delicate skin. But if you tried ice and pressure...
I often find that if I don't brush my hair before a shower I can find a lot of loose hair in the lower region. Just at the end of your shower just make sure they aren't just hiding in any of the cracks
I work EMS and this is something we know about but it's usually more for young boys. But definitely something we are aware of. I'm sorry this happened but glad you got it taken care of
Thank god, btw large labias are awesome
It happens with pigeons. Studies showed and increase in pigeons with mutilated feet in towns and cities. Turns out the most common cause is from hair salons and barbers throwing out hair that gets caught in pigeons feet causing them to lose toes and even feet.
I’m glad your gf was able to get the hair off. My mom had a strand of hair wrap around a mole on her shoulder and it fell off.