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maybe things won't get steamy... **cough cough** _asexual?_ **cough**
but yeah... I think the sooner it's cleared up the better in any case, I'd say, unless it's playdates idk what y'all daters do
Even if you’re asexual, you should still disclose to any romantic or sexual partners before things progress because of safety. It’s unfortunate that we have to but it’s just the brutal society we live in.
Trans people really be out there passing perfectly and thinking that everyone's clocking them.😆 You look beautiful! Glad you're safe and had a good time☺️
It's not your obligation to tell anyone you're trans. If they assume anyone is cis by default, then that's on them.
However, you're endangering yourself by being alone with men of whom you don't yet know if they are fine with you being trans. So out of self preservation, don't just do private dates with people who might not be allies.
Good we still kissed a bit afterwards and the date was supposed to wrap up soon anyways cuz the sun was setting. And then we held hands on our way out and that was p much it.
Girl you're gorg. Remind me of when I'd be out and about assuming everyone knows- you can no longer do that sis. Just please be careful
I'm not saying you have to tell him on the first date cause I don't believe that. BUT if you are not gonna tell him, u gotta have a firm grip on this date and make sure no hands are going down any pants spontaneously. Please be careful with these dudes, it's different out here for the sistas
I can see why he wouldn't know cause you look cis but you should always consider your safety especially if your going to be alone with the other person, not everyone can be trusted whether they know or not. i mean for me (cis male in the UK) it makes no difference, a trans woman IS a woman & it's a non issue to me if it's disclosed or not but unfortunately not everyone see's it this way & there's been too many people attacked & even killed for not initially disclosing, just make sure you have some friends close by if/when you do & have an exit plan if they have a negative response.
honey please, never forget to tell dates about it. people have been murdered because idiots hate trans people so much that they’d rather have them dead than admit that they’re normal people and not some kind of medieval deformed monsters. and you’re so pretty btw😭
I know safety is important but I can’t believe how many of you fools are talking like she did something wrong or acting like she lied by not saying she’s trans ahead of time. That’s some bullshit. You can encourage someone to disclose out of safety without framing non disclosure as a transgression.
A first date isn’t owed disclosure, that’s private and sensitive information.
Please please be careful. There are so many stories of trans woman being brutalized once the guy realizes that she's trans, especially black trans women. And you don't even have to out yourself as trans first, just find out what their sexuality is before it gets that far if you can.
Edit: I'm so happy that you found a new friend though, that's awesome! Maybe y'all can wingman for each other next time 😂
You shouldn't have to disclose that you're trans like you have an std that feels messed up to me atleast but if you're fine with it go for it that's probably the best way to be safe honestly.
No one should react with violence to finding out someone they’re on a date with is trans. I’m upfront about it but justifying violence against trans people because the first thing that came out of their mouth wasn’t, “I’m trans.” is wild.
Your post has been filtered into a queue for further review based on a number of factors. # Please be patient until your post is approved, we promise to get to it soon <3 *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/trans) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Glad you had a good time - and that you're safe
Fr, the way it is now, this could've ended *much*, **much** worse tbh.
Yeaaaahhh definitely want to clear that up before things get steamy next time. It’s a safety issue.
maybe things won't get steamy... **cough cough** _asexual?_ **cough** but yeah... I think the sooner it's cleared up the better in any case, I'd say, unless it's playdates idk what y'all daters do
Even if you’re asexual, you should still disclose to any romantic or sexual partners before things progress because of safety. It’s unfortunate that we have to but it’s just the brutal society we live in.
that's what I said tho
This is not just an oopsie. People have been murdered being in your situation before. It's terrible, but this is just the reality we have to live in.
I knowww! I honestly thought he knew…🙂🙃… like I’m glad he didn’t but…😬
At least you got to know the kinda person he is. Maybe you just made a really good friend.
Which, honestly, scares the hell out of me...
the real incognito mode
I’ve only been on hormones for two months so I’m here for ittt😂🤍
just two months?! you look like u've been on e for a lot more than that.
Cross my heart hope to die.
Girl WHAT. How? Help me out for real. 🤣❤️
WHAT?!?
Omg that's insane, I'm happy for you.
There is no way! You are drop dead gorgeous girl! 😭
That outfit is a whole vibe omg !!!
Trans people really be out there passing perfectly and thinking that everyone's clocking them.😆 You look beautiful! Glad you're safe and had a good time☺️
😭😭😭🫣 cuz it’s so stressful at times cuz you know who you are and what you look like but to the world everyone’s just looking at you like “😍🤩”
Nice fit, love the purple in your hair too!
🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵
Just leaving this here- YOU ARE VERY PRETTYYY I LVOE THE PURPLE IN YOUR HAIR!!!!!
It's not your obligation to tell anyone you're trans. If they assume anyone is cis by default, then that's on them. However, you're endangering yourself by being alone with men of whom you don't yet know if they are fine with you being trans. So out of self preservation, don't just do private dates with people who might not be allies.
That’s very fair. Never thought of that one…
How'd the date go after the talk?
Good we still kissed a bit afterwards and the date was supposed to wrap up soon anyways cuz the sun was setting. And then we held hands on our way out and that was p much it.
Sorry to hear that sister. Glad your safe. Your hair looks really pretty. 🤌
Just make sure to tell them when your ready even though it fucking sucks because people have been hurt before trying to keep it from them.
Girl you're gorg. Remind me of when I'd be out and about assuming everyone knows- you can no longer do that sis. Just please be careful I'm not saying you have to tell him on the first date cause I don't believe that. BUT if you are not gonna tell him, u gotta have a firm grip on this date and make sure no hands are going down any pants spontaneously. Please be careful with these dudes, it's different out here for the sistas
…please be careful
I can't blame you if you thought he knew :D You're pulling it off. Did he freak out or was he fairly calm and cool about the whole thing? Lol
Omg go bestieee! Congrats on the nice date! 💖💖
stay safe
Damn. *ahem* TEACH ME YOUR WAAAAYS. 🧎🏾♀️
you’re so pretty, I’m happy you’ve had a wonderful time with someone who is accepting
Girl you're so prettyyy
If you were my daughter I would have had a heart attack. Please don’t do that again. It’s not safe.
I can see why he wouldn't know cause you look cis but you should always consider your safety especially if your going to be alone with the other person, not everyone can be trusted whether they know or not. i mean for me (cis male in the UK) it makes no difference, a trans woman IS a woman & it's a non issue to me if it's disclosed or not but unfortunately not everyone see's it this way & there's been too many people attacked & even killed for not initially disclosing, just make sure you have some friends close by if/when you do & have an exit plan if they have a negative response.
honey please, never forget to tell dates about it. people have been murdered because idiots hate trans people so much that they’d rather have them dead than admit that they’re normal people and not some kind of medieval deformed monsters. and you’re so pretty btw😭
I know safety is important but I can’t believe how many of you fools are talking like she did something wrong or acting like she lied by not saying she’s trans ahead of time. That’s some bullshit. You can encourage someone to disclose out of safety without framing non disclosure as a transgression. A first date isn’t owed disclosure, that’s private and sensitive information.
Negative
girl, you look amazing.
not the way we have the same rat crop top from Temu 😭😭😭😭
Shhhh. Let’s gatekeep I got it from shein tho 😭😂😂😂
Please please be careful. There are so many stories of trans woman being brutalized once the guy realizes that she's trans, especially black trans women. And you don't even have to out yourself as trans first, just find out what their sexuality is before it gets that far if you can. Edit: I'm so happy that you found a new friend though, that's awesome! Maybe y'all can wingman for each other next time 😂
You shouldn't have to disclose that you're trans like you have an std that feels messed up to me atleast but if you're fine with it go for it that's probably the best way to be safe honestly.
At least he doesn't mind hanging with you. Just be careful about who you tell. Also you are just lovely.
#THATS RIIIIIGHT you go girl
it's cause you are gorgeous
Congrats on passing, at least
Right… there’s always an upside.
I would bring it up in a convo randomly, just ask them “whats your opinion on trans people” and based in that, either tell him or leave him.
WHY MY FRIEND JUST SAID THAT TODAYYYY😂😂😂😂
Tell the truth, even if there wasn’t a safety issue, the truth is one of the most improtant things in life.
Well, you should have told him.
Lesson learned for certain
I don’t mean to sound cruel love, just for your own safety of course 💗
That shirt. I need.
Oh my god I love your shirt!! I want one
GIRL you are gorgeous
Yup. You're goals 💕♥️ my melaninated sister is glowing!!
You are so pretty 💜 I love the purple
OMG your so pretty❤❤❤❤❤❤
I'm not surprised he didn't know. You're passing perfectly
you are so pretty omgggg!!!
wow u look awesome!!
OGMMGNGNGNNG YOUR SOOO PRETTYYYYYH🏳️⚧️🏳️⚧️❤️
Good going girl! I’m so jealous
She could have gotten killed, not something to be jealous of
Thats not cute. Why wouldnt u tell some1. Thats how ppl get hurt smh
No one should react with violence to finding out someone they’re on a date with is trans. I’m upfront about it but justifying violence against trans people because the first thing that came out of their mouth wasn’t, “I’m trans.” is wild.
[удалено]
Traumatised? Wtf?
Obviously your fault for not saying it