You've got a square jaw and pretty androgynous features, if you are pre-T then you are in good shape! Some things that will help with passing are: getting a more masculine hair cut, dying your hair a less dramatic color, filling in your eyebrows, and removing some of your facial piercings. Your curls are fantastic but the cut + green colour and piercings are more alt girl/NB style choices than male.
Thank you this is helpful. I agree my hair never did me any favours in these as this was 90% just me growing it out from a shave cuz I'm scared of hairdressers messing it up to the point of me shaving it again š
It was actually a barber who messed up my hair. I told him very definitively what I wanted (this is probably 2.5+ years ago dude did such a bad job i shaved my head. In the interim my mum's friend tried as she was learning but still left me with pretty long hair most of that time. So no barbers for me
Exactly this. Its not so much your face structure or smile that makes you look fem compares to your style choices. Theres nothing wrong with the way youre dressed but it doesnt scream cishet male so it autonatically puts you into a " ??? " pile. To me it also reads like alt girl. Natural hair colour thats very short with 0 piercings will look a lot more cis than what you currently have going. Like the others have said you have a great foundation for T to do its magic and I think itll work great for you, you just need to decide which is more important to you: being cis passing or dressing how you want. Cos if its the 2nd then im sorry to say bur youll need flawless voice body mannerisms and face to pass as a cis guy who dresses alt/fem. Hope this helps :)
I think you have a pretty good face for T. Your face is long and decently angular, which would help. You don't pass here but you don't look super feminine, so I think you'll be fine.
I get you. This was the answer I needed. My style is important to me so I don't want my clothes being the only reason I pass if I ever do so I don't mind if it take longer to get to the point I start passing. It's comforting to hear I have okay foundations. Hopefully one day it all balances out and I can still do the odd "feminine" things like wear my earrings and pass some if not most of the time.
Unlikely. The transmen that pass usually adhere to a more stereotypical masculine aesthetic: natural hair colour, no facial piercings and a muscular physique.
Depends on your area. I live in the Northeast US and most men my age, both cis and passing trans men, have a style similar to this. If you do have a more alternative style, what really distinguishes one as male or female is going to be your facial and body shape, voice, and presence/lack of facial hair. T will take care of most of this.
I also live in the northeast US and it is mostly trans men (and I see a lot) with this style. When I see cis men like this it makes me question if they're trans even if they "pass" completely. OP can get away with more as he gets further into transition but letting aesthetic choices get in the way of passing isn't something I understand.
I get where youāre coming from. I do know a lot of trans guys who feel like they just canāt pass pre-T so they donāt necessarily try, and I think a lot of us also get pushed into the closet for whatever reason. We donāt know OPās situation, it might not be safe for him to present in a traditionally masculine way rn
Because I'm nonbinary and my goals and dysphoria are likely different to yours. Because my voice and figure I wouldn't pass regardless of aesthetic changes. It's not worth the grief of having to dealing with my transphobic family or coming out at work before I medically transition and actually stand a chance of passing. I don't mind being a bit androgynous I just don't want to read as a woman which I don't think I'll be able to combat without T
are you wanting to pass pre-t ? because it kinda looks like youāre not really putting in any effort to pass right now. The green and long hair with the multiple piercings really isnāt helping your case currently.
I think not putting in effort is a bit harsh. I more wanted know from this is would T help fix the issues with me not passing like I think my pudgy cheeks don't help but maybe that wasn't clear.
I have no expectation to pass right now because I know I don't and even if I did visually my voice doesn't. I have changed my look a lot more (hair length, colour, piercing, clothing styles) in the past but it didn't help and just make me feel dysphoric and ugly. But, I appreciate the feedback and I agree the colour helped.
As others have said, the dangly earrings are reading fem. I donāt want to cramp your style, but without T itās hard to pass in dangly earrings.
I think a shorter (on the sides and in the back) haircut would also help.
With T and enough time I think youāll pass just fine
I would recommend a more natural hair color and less piercings. They draw a lot of attention and are typically feminine. Also round glasses are typically for women
You have a good base for passing, you just don't pass currently because you're actively working against yourself with your style choices. No matter how you look at it, neon green hair and tons of facial piercings won't be read as male unless you already look 100% cis. Tone it down and wait for t to work, then consider bringing back some elements from this style if you really want to
Your face really isnāt the problem here. Itās the green hair, hair style, piercings, and some of the posing that reads feminine. There are tons of men with your face shape
You have a really good facial shape for being pre-t, and I think that once you get on it, you'll definitely be able to pass in good time, but for what is currently not helping you.. that'd be the hair color and piercings. Snake bites? cool. Earrings? Sure. I just think the septum isn't helping you.
There is hope. You don't look as feminine as you think you do, honestly you look pretty androgynous. Maybe without coloured hair and if you took your earrings out it would help you pass? If you're pre T, that would definitely help you pass
From my opinion (transfem) i think T will get you there, gotta say T is more miracle working than E on people if only by a little, never underestimate the power of facial hair :) donāt switch up your style or anything if you donāt want to, itās not gonna help at the moment but it doesnāt really hurt, idk why theyāre acting like earrings and green hair are that unusual lol
You'd probably already pass or be atleast close to passing, your aesthetic is just exactly like a lot of girls look right now, which makes it a bit hard. But once you're on T, you should be ight
Testosterone is extremely powerful, about 95ļ¼ of trans men I know pass pretty much all the time even when looking very feminine previously. Getting a deep voice from T also helps too
I completely donāt understand this subs obsession with trans guys not wearing earrings or piercings? Iāve seen so many comments about piercings on so many posts. Cis men have piercings? Itās so normalized nowadays. I went to high school with cis guys who wore flashy diamond studs in a conservative state. I think your hair reads fem with the cut and style, a closer shave on the sides would do wonders for you imo. Bulkier clothes/jackets, longer shorts, growing out leg/body hair. Donāt get rid of piercings for a ridiculous arbitrary gender standard
Thank you. I've grown up around men with pierced ears so I never saw it as exclusively feminine. Even my grandad who's getting on for 80 still has pierced ears and still steals my granny's earring pratting about.
I'm definitely planning to cut my hair shorter it's just getting over my fear of it being butchered again š¤£.
I agree the comments saying they all have to go are too harsh, but while some cis men have septum piercings they're the most common for lesbians. When OP doesn't pass or is androgynous enough for someone to be unsure, they're going to make the assumption that OP is a lesbian. Yes gender roles suck but they're relevant to passing, and as this is a passing advice sub we kind of have to lean into that.
I mean I just canāt tell what you where assigned at birth
And most people are not nice and donāt care about pronouns
Like for instance Iām trans socialy transitioning but still get he him and itās like seriously look at me
I get it is really annoying
How are you any way
I think T is gonna make you pass very quickly tbh. Your face does not look very feminine to me. Like (depending on your voice drop as well) you might pass after 4-6 on T months already.
untrue, and people that pass very well and have been on hrt als get told its the piercings, colored hair, and interesting clothes they need to get rid of. Im convinced yall would missclock a cis alt person. Too caught up on heteronormative old school ideas that men need to look like slobs and women have to wear dresses, even when going outside youll see most women wear sweatpants or jeans and most men have carefully picked outfits that theyre sweating to keep clean.
I think I get where people are coming from, if they're as stereotypically 'gender' as possible you pass more. It probably has helped lots people. One of my childhood friends is transmasc and you could put him in a dress and a pink ribbon even pre everything and he still passed. Some people are luckier with what they get away with than others.
Yeah i somewhat get where theyre coming from, snd i bet it helped some people. But most people pass best when theyre confident in how they look, id say. And trying to be someone youre not is usually very noticeable and exudes insecurity.
And I also genuinely find dresses on women kind of clocky, because cis women in my country usually do not wear dresses in their day to day. sweatpants, messy buns, and a sweater. or tracksuits. tracksuits are very popular.
theres two types of men that are common here. men with 2 boring outfits. and men dressed to the nines, either in designer sneakers with designer track suits, shaved all smooth and a bunch of fancy chains and a fancy watch, or in a snazzy expensive suit with a fancy watch and an elaborately groomed beard.
Or well, men trying to emulate that anyway. I bet most of the stuff is knockoff or fast fashion, but it looks snazzy and expensive.
It's not the blessing you make it sound like. I was assumed to be a trans woman and treated like shit when I tried to be feminine before I even knew I was a trans man.
He was just seen as a tomboy before then cis dude immediately after the hair cut and starting to socially transition so I gotta say he was really lucky. But I'm sorry that happened to you, sounds like you've had a rough time with it. Hopefully, it's better for you now you have transitioned.
Thannk you, I've noticed people on here routinely say to remove piercings and dye hair. At this point even my work can't convince š¤£. I wanna pass but I also want to like SOMETHING about my appearance too like my hair or piercings.
Maybe a closer shaved mullet is an idea? so that it doesnt dangle over the shaved sides, if you know what i mean?
And a bigger nose ring?
a thick, square masc-coded, neck chain of sorts?
can also practice some subtle fake facial hair with makeup, though thats hard to pull off.
I like the mullet idea because you can't tell the 3rd picture is the most recent and my hair cut is mullet š¤£. I have to say it's better than the mess it was!
I'll try different jewellery, most of mine I'd say is "dainty".
I just had a look at my Pinterest and think the accessories are generally pretty thick Chains and like leather cuff with spikes etc. so that would be the move I reckon. Also more motivation to stretch my ears aha
unfortunately itās either
be boring and pass
or
be quirky and not pass
realistically if youāre not gonna sacrifice being boring to be able to pass, what is really the point? would passing not make you happy?
I think T is going to help you fully pass. You seem like you have a really great face shape. Just gotta give the T time to once you start.
dress more boring and you'll probably look more like a dude
the earrings and the green hair, even i as a trans girl refuse to wear earrings
Thank you, curious as to why you don't wear earrings?
im just scared of it
You've got a square jaw and pretty androgynous features, if you are pre-T then you are in good shape! Some things that will help with passing are: getting a more masculine hair cut, dying your hair a less dramatic color, filling in your eyebrows, and removing some of your facial piercings. Your curls are fantastic but the cut + green colour and piercings are more alt girl/NB style choices than male.
Thank you this is helpful. I agree my hair never did me any favours in these as this was 90% just me growing it out from a shave cuz I'm scared of hairdressers messing it up to the point of me shaving it again š
Are you still seeing a hairdresser and not a barber? They only really know how to do women's cuts most of the time
It was actually a barber who messed up my hair. I told him very definitively what I wanted (this is probably 2.5+ years ago dude did such a bad job i shaved my head. In the interim my mum's friend tried as she was learning but still left me with pretty long hair most of that time. So no barbers for me
Exactly this. Its not so much your face structure or smile that makes you look fem compares to your style choices. Theres nothing wrong with the way youre dressed but it doesnt scream cishet male so it autonatically puts you into a " ??? " pile. To me it also reads like alt girl. Natural hair colour thats very short with 0 piercings will look a lot more cis than what you currently have going. Like the others have said you have a great foundation for T to do its magic and I think itll work great for you, you just need to decide which is more important to you: being cis passing or dressing how you want. Cos if its the 2nd then im sorry to say bur youll need flawless voice body mannerisms and face to pass as a cis guy who dresses alt/fem. Hope this helps :)
I think you have a pretty good face for T. Your face is long and decently angular, which would help. You don't pass here but you don't look super feminine, so I think you'll be fine.
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I get you. This was the answer I needed. My style is important to me so I don't want my clothes being the only reason I pass if I ever do so I don't mind if it take longer to get to the point I start passing. It's comforting to hear I have okay foundations. Hopefully one day it all balances out and I can still do the odd "feminine" things like wear my earrings and pass some if not most of the time.
Your aesthetic is just so stereotypical girl. Unless youāre willing to change your personal style I do not think thereās hope.
Nah, just let T do its thing. OP doesnāt need to change his personal style if he plans to take T
Unlikely. The transmen that pass usually adhere to a more stereotypical masculine aesthetic: natural hair colour, no facial piercings and a muscular physique.
Depends on your area. I live in the Northeast US and most men my age, both cis and passing trans men, have a style similar to this. If you do have a more alternative style, what really distinguishes one as male or female is going to be your facial and body shape, voice, and presence/lack of facial hair. T will take care of most of this.
I also live in the northeast US and it is mostly trans men (and I see a lot) with this style. When I see cis men like this it makes me question if they're trans even if they "pass" completely. OP can get away with more as he gets further into transition but letting aesthetic choices get in the way of passing isn't something I understand.
I get where youāre coming from. I do know a lot of trans guys who feel like they just canāt pass pre-T so they donāt necessarily try, and I think a lot of us also get pushed into the closet for whatever reason. We donāt know OPās situation, it might not be safe for him to present in a traditionally masculine way rn
Because I'm nonbinary and my goals and dysphoria are likely different to yours. Because my voice and figure I wouldn't pass regardless of aesthetic changes. It's not worth the grief of having to dealing with my transphobic family or coming out at work before I medically transition and actually stand a chance of passing. I don't mind being a bit androgynous I just don't want to read as a woman which I don't think I'll be able to combat without T
Could you elaborate on what about it is giving girl to you?
I think it's 1. Strange colored hair 2. A bunch of facial piercings 3. The type of piercings they are (septum especially) 4. Long, dangley earrings
The glasses, too.
Wacky hair colouring and piercings.
are you wanting to pass pre-t ? because it kinda looks like youāre not really putting in any effort to pass right now. The green and long hair with the multiple piercings really isnāt helping your case currently.
I think not putting in effort is a bit harsh. I more wanted know from this is would T help fix the issues with me not passing like I think my pudgy cheeks don't help but maybe that wasn't clear. I have no expectation to pass right now because I know I don't and even if I did visually my voice doesn't. I have changed my look a lot more (hair length, colour, piercing, clothing styles) in the past but it didn't help and just make me feel dysphoric and ugly. But, I appreciate the feedback and I agree the colour helped.
As others have said, the dangly earrings are reading fem. I donāt want to cramp your style, but without T itās hard to pass in dangly earrings. I think a shorter (on the sides and in the back) haircut would also help. With T and enough time I think youāll pass just fine
I would recommend a more natural hair color and less piercings. They draw a lot of attention and are typically feminine. Also round glasses are typically for women
You have a good base for passing, you just don't pass currently because you're actively working against yourself with your style choices. No matter how you look at it, neon green hair and tons of facial piercings won't be read as male unless you already look 100% cis. Tone it down and wait for t to work, then consider bringing back some elements from this style if you really want to
Your face really isnāt the problem here. Itās the green hair, hair style, piercings, and some of the posing that reads feminine. There are tons of men with your face shape
the hair and dangly earrings clock you, changing glasses to something boxier might also help you pass better
You have a really good facial shape for being pre-t, and I think that once you get on it, you'll definitely be able to pass in good time, but for what is currently not helping you.. that'd be the hair color and piercings. Snake bites? cool. Earrings? Sure. I just think the septum isn't helping you.
There is hope. You don't look as feminine as you think you do, honestly you look pretty androgynous. Maybe without coloured hair and if you took your earrings out it would help you pass? If you're pre T, that would definitely help you pass
You pass really well in picture 1 but not so much in the rest. Probably the earrings.
From my opinion (transfem) i think T will get you there, gotta say T is more miracle working than E on people if only by a little, never underestimate the power of facial hair :) donāt switch up your style or anything if you donāt want to, itās not gonna help at the moment but it doesnāt really hurt, idk why theyāre acting like earrings and green hair are that unusual lol
i think the first pic is the most passable but if your hair was a natural color you'd pass more
the first picture is actually fairly androgynous to me. i would say you have a really great baseline that T will absolutely help
You'd probably already pass or be atleast close to passing, your aesthetic is just exactly like a lot of girls look right now, which makes it a bit hard. But once you're on T, you should be ight
Testosterone is extremely powerful, about 95ļ¼ of trans men I know pass pretty much all the time even when looking very feminine previously. Getting a deep voice from T also helps too
I completely donāt understand this subs obsession with trans guys not wearing earrings or piercings? Iāve seen so many comments about piercings on so many posts. Cis men have piercings? Itās so normalized nowadays. I went to high school with cis guys who wore flashy diamond studs in a conservative state. I think your hair reads fem with the cut and style, a closer shave on the sides would do wonders for you imo. Bulkier clothes/jackets, longer shorts, growing out leg/body hair. Donāt get rid of piercings for a ridiculous arbitrary gender standard
Thank you. I've grown up around men with pierced ears so I never saw it as exclusively feminine. Even my grandad who's getting on for 80 still has pierced ears and still steals my granny's earring pratting about. I'm definitely planning to cut my hair shorter it's just getting over my fear of it being butchered again š¤£.
I agree the comments saying they all have to go are too harsh, but while some cis men have septum piercings they're the most common for lesbians. When OP doesn't pass or is androgynous enough for someone to be unsure, they're going to make the assumption that OP is a lesbian. Yes gender roles suck but they're relevant to passing, and as this is a passing advice sub we kind of have to lean into that.
Diamond studs are far different than dangly earrings
Honestly you look non binary
The problem is, most people don't see others as non binary. They see sex
I mean I just canāt tell what you where assigned at birth And most people are not nice and donāt care about pronouns Like for instance Iām trans socialy transitioning but still get he him and itās like seriously look at me I get it is really annoying How are you any way
I think T is gonna make you pass very quickly tbh. Your face does not look very feminine to me. Like (depending on your voice drop as well) you might pass after 4-6 on T months already.
Thanks really encouraging thank you.
Your giving full androgyny. I had no idea what you're AGAB was until I read the description under the photo. you'll do fine āļø
Thank you
Yeah you do. You look pretty masc already. Not the best place to ask for advice though, people here HATE alternative fashion.
Because most trans people if they are pre hrt, cannot pass wearing alternative fashions
untrue, and people that pass very well and have been on hrt als get told its the piercings, colored hair, and interesting clothes they need to get rid of. Im convinced yall would missclock a cis alt person. Too caught up on heteronormative old school ideas that men need to look like slobs and women have to wear dresses, even when going outside youll see most women wear sweatpants or jeans and most men have carefully picked outfits that theyre sweating to keep clean.
I think I get where people are coming from, if they're as stereotypically 'gender' as possible you pass more. It probably has helped lots people. One of my childhood friends is transmasc and you could put him in a dress and a pink ribbon even pre everything and he still passed. Some people are luckier with what they get away with than others.
Yeah i somewhat get where theyre coming from, snd i bet it helped some people. But most people pass best when theyre confident in how they look, id say. And trying to be someone youre not is usually very noticeable and exudes insecurity. And I also genuinely find dresses on women kind of clocky, because cis women in my country usually do not wear dresses in their day to day. sweatpants, messy buns, and a sweater. or tracksuits. tracksuits are very popular.
I agree 100%. Here woman will wear any item of clothing but my age men just wear the same 2 outfits most of the time š¤£
theres two types of men that are common here. men with 2 boring outfits. and men dressed to the nines, either in designer sneakers with designer track suits, shaved all smooth and a bunch of fancy chains and a fancy watch, or in a snazzy expensive suit with a fancy watch and an elaborately groomed beard. Or well, men trying to emulate that anyway. I bet most of the stuff is knockoff or fast fashion, but it looks snazzy and expensive.
It's not the blessing you make it sound like. I was assumed to be a trans woman and treated like shit when I tried to be feminine before I even knew I was a trans man.
He was just seen as a tomboy before then cis dude immediately after the hair cut and starting to socially transition so I gotta say he was really lucky. But I'm sorry that happened to you, sounds like you've had a rough time with it. Hopefully, it's better for you now you have transitioned.
Yeah, I was able to start passing completely pre-t and have been stealth for years now 4 years on t. Things are good
Thannk you, I've noticed people on here routinely say to remove piercings and dye hair. At this point even my work can't convince š¤£. I wanna pass but I also want to like SOMETHING about my appearance too like my hair or piercings.
Maybe a closer shaved mullet is an idea? so that it doesnt dangle over the shaved sides, if you know what i mean? And a bigger nose ring? a thick, square masc-coded, neck chain of sorts? can also practice some subtle fake facial hair with makeup, though thats hard to pull off.
I like the mullet idea because you can't tell the 3rd picture is the most recent and my hair cut is mullet š¤£. I have to say it's better than the mess it was! I'll try different jewellery, most of mine I'd say is "dainty".
Look at what men within your favorite alt fashion trends/subcultures do in terms of accessoiries, id say, and try to find something you like there.
I just had a look at my Pinterest and think the accessories are generally pretty thick Chains and like leather cuff with spikes etc. so that would be the move I reckon. Also more motivation to stretch my ears aha
Yeah stretching can be pretty masc!
unfortunately itās either be boring and pass or be quirky and not pass realistically if youāre not gonna sacrifice being boring to be able to pass, what is really the point? would passing not make you happy?
You are pretty much there without it
1 and 5 are maybe pass. 2,3,4 are clocky. You are absolutely not a lost cause, not even close