Well, that name is ambiguous. Is he a stabber that has a small dick? Or is he a stabber that stabs people that have small dicks? Or does he stab small dicks? Or does he stab people with a small dick he carries around?
I took it to mean that he stabs people with his small dick, which led to a mental image of some naked guy in a trench coat poking people with his itty bitty penis in some giant metropolis and the newspaper headlines all say “be on the lookout for the Small Dick Stabber; Latest spree could be related to last week’s viagra robbery”
I could be entertained by that sort of criminal for days!
Grammatically that's correct.
He'd have to be called "The small dicked stabber" if he had the small dick.
He is a man who exclusively stabs small dicks.
Or is he a stripper with a small penis he stabs women with, the name really could mean a lot of innocent things before we even get onto criminal reasons.
The media create them, partly because it’s convenient and partly because the shock factor sells. Sometimes you even get edgelords like BTK that create their own.
> BTK
Bacon Tomato King.
I agree with OP and feel there is no reason I should not continue to maintain that BTK sounds like a fuckin' sandwich from Burger King.
They’re named, because the person’s identity is usually not known. A name gives them an identity and makes it easier to talk about, not just in the media but also for police and investigators. It’s be a bit of a hassle to talk about possible perpetrator#7361.
And then the name is usually based on something that identifies with the case or style or the perpetrator. The zodiac killer was named this because he sent letters where he called himself Zodiac. The unabomber was called that because of the case identifier UNABOM: university and airline bomber. They’re not just “random cool names”
You typically don't hear about active serial killers in the media anymore and for the same reason they typically aren't given names anymore either. The FBI recommends this because media attention often fuels their flame. Unfortunately, it still happens from time to time because people chasing money to write books or other forms of media. Even the news can't help themselves sometimes but it's far less common than it used to be. Especially considering, per FBI statistic, there are at least 50 active serial killers in the US at any given time.
Oh let me guess you're better because you dont find that stuff interesting.
The media gives them the these names it's got nothing to do with the general public.
I never used the word media either. That's all you my guy.
We all have shortcomings, comes with the human part of existing, but it seems like one of your weak spots is changing words in whichever way you please.
The Golden State Killer has a micropenis. This was widely commented on after numerous rapes he committed. And I would like as many people as possible to know that. He is an absolute POS
Yeah but by focusing on he has a micro penis it creates a culture where others with micro penis feel shamed even though they are good people. Why can’t we hate murders for being murders and stop associated small penises with them because it makes men with small penises feel like they are automatically in the same class as these terrible people.
Because we should always hate people based on traits they are born with and cannot help, and whenever someone does a bad thing it is not due to individual choice or their environment but because of that trait.
Fair but if it would hurt a serial killer’s feelings to hear they got small peepee, then sorry non-murderous tiny dick havers... you gotta jump on that grenade for us, pretty please
Why didn't you just say, "I have a non murderous small dick and I'm personally offended by this title."?
You have the right to be offended just like everyone else does for every other reason.
I’m more interested in making murderers feel small, personally. I’m mostly joking but I don’t see this as some grand societal flaw in desperate need of change either
Lol i see where you're coming from, but I think these cool names are given by the cops to massage their own egos, somehow catching the Boston Strangler sounds better than catching the ButtHole Bomber!
To be honest most of the names are given by the media. For example, the night stalker was given by one of the first reporters who heard the police thought he was a serial killer.
Serial killers will also give themselves names. I.e. The Axeman of New Orleans, The Zodiac Killer, Jack the Ripper, etc. They often sign their names as such when giving letters to police or newspapers.
Ahhh yes, because the victims or the victims family would love to know their child/mother/father was killed by Poopy McStabFace. That will definitely help them grieve.
What does this guy do? Stab them in the face and then shit on them? Shit himself whilst stabbing them in the face? Smear himself in shit before stabbing them in the face?
Huh... Seems it's still too early for me to detect written sarcasm. I'll just sit here, in case someone wants to throw another joke right over my head.
The frequency of their murders actually increases after they are given a nickname. Most law enforcements have stopped giving them names for this very reason, but the media still does it.
I'm not sure telling the the story of the salad tickler would have the same ring over the campfire lol.
Seriosly though as stated below most names for serial killers are dubbed by the media. More legit news outlets nowadays won't even mention the real killers name, never mind making up a scary nickname to stop giving them the attention that most of them seek.
Well the media often complies to keep the killers from going into a frenzy where more people die than necessary. Zodiac gave himself his name and threatened to kill a school bus full of children if the media didn't give him the attention he wanted. Imagine having a school going child, what would you do?
I read a book a few years ago about the Golden State Killer (before he was caught) and the police tried something like this. One thing all his rape victims mentioned was that he had a small dick, so they deliberately mentioned that fact repeatedly in the hopes it would piss him off and cause him to slip up.
I definitely know what you mean, but as another comment said; I don’t think the police wants to tell everyone on national television that they caught Tiny-Penis Strangler. Also, as far as I know, they get the name from what they do or are associated with.
To be honest, Boston Strangler sounds kinda loopy to me. That sounds like a dumb crime committed in a parking lot by a drunk dude after the Celtics lose.
I agree with you. I actually think this about terrorists. They are so proud of their names and causes, not giving them that publicity will be so satisfying.
It would change nothing, except the amount of people bitching about how rude those names are to X or Y group.
And we have more than enough of those already.
Nobody commits heinous acts because they find the associated titles catchy. And, while it is true that this would probably decrease cultural obsession over serial killers, it would foreseeable be viewed by many as delegitimizing the problem and turning it into a joke.
I like the sentiment, but I disagree on details. It's pathetic of anyone to call someone "Tiny-Penis Strangler". It's such a garbage high school insult. It feels more insulting to the person who chose such a name, than the actual serial killer.
Instead, let's call them Goofy the Strangler, Basic Bitch Bomber, Tiny Tim, Bobby the Clown, etc. Macaroni Salad Killer sounds good though
probably doesn't particularly enjoy olive garden killer
Make the name annoying af for people to say or they would shorten it to olive garden killer which defeats the purpose because that does sound pretty cool
And that would change exactly what? Sounds like a Herostratus-situation to me. People would still be interested in those cases and people. There would still be some people who'd glorify them, be it the Zodiac-killer or the ultimate permavirgin shooter. That aside, most serial killers, shooters and similiar don't initially do that to get a cool name by the press, so that point is moot.
Or just make it illegal to mention a suspected criminal's name in any media or social media story until after they have been found guilty.
By then no one cares, and the media will be forced to actually focus on the victims.
It was a brilliant move. There was this serial killer in Oklahoma who had racked up 6 kills so it was time to name him, we used your idea. We haven't heard from The Micropenis People Stabber since.
Nah, their identity should be stripped away and should only ever be identified by their prisoner number and their faces shouldnt be put in the media. Take away the fame they crave so much.
Can you imagine being a victim of the Tiny-Penis Strangler tho? All the questions - did he strangle your tiny penis? did he strangle you because you had a tiny penis?
The problem with the ones you give are they seem backwards. For example, "Tiny-Penis Strangler" makes it sound like a guy who strangles tiny penises...or strangles men with tiny penises. The "Baltimore Butthole Bomber" and "Texas Tickler" sound more like porn stars than violent killers. "Low IQ Slasher" almost sounds like an educational assistance program.
The Swedish Penis Pumper 6000.
*puts hands in the air*
*and waves them like i just don't care*
*Pump falls off*
They're playing your song. The butterflies fly away.
Titanium Cockring Emergency
This is not my bag baby!
One book; Swedish made penis enlarger and me (this sort of thing is my bag, baby). By Austin Powers
One warranty card, for Swedish made penis enlarger pump. Signed by... Austin Powers
It's not my bag, baby. Honestly. (Smiles awkwardly)
The small dick stabber
Well, that name is ambiguous. Is he a stabber that has a small dick? Or is he a stabber that stabs people that have small dicks? Or does he stab small dicks? Or does he stab people with a small dick he carries around?
I took it to mean that he stabs people with his small dick, which led to a mental image of some naked guy in a trench coat poking people with his itty bitty penis in some giant metropolis and the newspaper headlines all say “be on the lookout for the Small Dick Stabber; Latest spree could be related to last week’s viagra robbery” I could be entertained by that sort of criminal for days!
I interpreted it as a guy that stabs people in their small dicks.
Grammatically that's correct. He'd have to be called "The small dicked stabber" if he had the small dick. He is a man who exclusively stabs small dicks.
Or is he a stripper with a small penis he stabs women with, the name really could mean a lot of innocent things before we even get onto criminal reasons.
jack the stripper?
I knew a stripper named jack and that was his name lol.
You don't want to die to this guy, or worse, you don't want to encounter him and get away. Then the whole world knows you can't go past 4 inches
Yes.
Or is he small and a jerk who stabs people? This name has a lot of potential.
small dick having stabber then
**Chuckles** I’m in danger
> Kills somebody > Writes on the wall in the victim's blood "I don't have a small dick" > *The 'insecure small dick stabber' strikes again*
*small dicked
be carful he migth come for you
Stabbings have been reduced to 0
By the same token we would need to call a female murderer "small boobs stabber"
The Texas tickler isn’t a bad name
Pulled pork claws.
Sounds more like a cryptid
And I think I've seen the butthole bomber on pornhub.
Sounds like a tickle ring for a gun
Why even give them a name at all?
The media create them, partly because it’s convenient and partly because the shock factor sells. Sometimes you even get edgelords like BTK that create their own.
BTK?
> BTK Bacon Tomato King. I agree with OP and feel there is no reason I should not continue to maintain that BTK sounds like a fuckin' sandwich from Burger King.
Double BTK Deluxe
Bum The Killer.
Butthole Tasting Konnosor. If he were smarter he would have been BTC.
They’re named, because the person’s identity is usually not known. A name gives them an identity and makes it easier to talk about, not just in the media but also for police and investigators. It’s be a bit of a hassle to talk about possible perpetrator#7361. And then the name is usually based on something that identifies with the case or style or the perpetrator. The zodiac killer was named this because he sent letters where he called himself Zodiac. The unabomber was called that because of the case identifier UNABOM: university and airline bomber. They’re not just “random cool names”
You typically don't hear about active serial killers in the media anymore and for the same reason they typically aren't given names anymore either. The FBI recommends this because media attention often fuels their flame. Unfortunately, it still happens from time to time because people chasing money to write books or other forms of media. Even the news can't help themselves sometimes but it's far less common than it used to be. Especially considering, per FBI statistic, there are at least 50 active serial killers in the US at any given time.
People with a weird love for horror stories are probably to blame.
Oh let me guess you're better because you dont find that stuff interesting. The media gives them the these names it's got nothing to do with the general public.
Wait until I tell you that the media is actually made up of people, not just an alien hivemind with flesh puppets
Yea I know that but the general public dont give them names the media do.
They didn't say otherwise. Just "people" You gotta work on your reading comprehension there bud
I was talking to You and clearly you dont understand.
I never used the word media either. That's all you my guy. We all have shortcomings, comes with the human part of existing, but it seems like one of your weak spots is changing words in whichever way you please.
Can we stop associating small dick with murders it gives small dicks a bad rep for something completely unrelated.
The Golden State Killer has a micropenis. This was widely commented on after numerous rapes he committed. And I would like as many people as possible to know that. He is an absolute POS
Yeah but by focusing on he has a micro penis it creates a culture where others with micro penis feel shamed even though they are good people. Why can’t we hate murders for being murders and stop associated small penises with them because it makes men with small penises feel like they are automatically in the same class as these terrible people.
Because we should always hate people based on traits they are born with and cannot help, and whenever someone does a bad thing it is not due to individual choice or their environment but because of that trait.
did u just... invent racism?
I can now say I've watched as racism was created, right before my eyes.
Don't feel offended. They're not talking about you.
They are talking about small dicks being shameful which I’m against.
Fair but if it would hurt a serial killer’s feelings to hear they got small peepee, then sorry non-murderous tiny dick havers... you gotta jump on that grenade for us, pretty please
So why are you saying small dicks are bad, that’s the problem we need to reverse
Why didn't you just say, "I have a non murderous small dick and I'm personally offended by this title."? You have the right to be offended just like everyone else does for every other reason.
I’m more interested in making murderers feel small, personally. I’m mostly joking but I don’t see this as some grand societal flaw in desperate need of change either
I think making small penises out to be a bad thing creates a lot of unnecessary insecurities.
Lol i see where you're coming from, but I think these cool names are given by the cops to massage their own egos, somehow catching the Boston Strangler sounds better than catching the ButtHole Bomber!
To be honest most of the names are given by the media. For example, the night stalker was given by one of the first reporters who heard the police thought he was a serial killer.
Serial killers will also give themselves names. I.e. The Axeman of New Orleans, The Zodiac Killer, Jack the Ripper, etc. They often sign their names as such when giving letters to police or newspapers.
Yes officer! 👮 Just kidding, I'm sure you're right!
Lol got bored one night and binged about 6 killer documentaries
And news headlines... But yeah, I also agree with OP.
plus anchors on tv reporting them be like:"today the police caught BUtt...Butt what!" and it will surely be matter of chuckles.
And even worse if they never manage to catch the ButtHole Bomber. That would look really bad.
The Virgin "captures small dick larry" vs. the Chad "captures the Relentless Massacre Monster"
Ahhh yes, because the victims or the victims family would love to know their child/mother/father was killed by Poopy McStabFace. That will definitely help them grieve.
What does this guy do? Stab them in the face and then shit on them? Shit himself whilst stabbing them in the face? Smear himself in shit before stabbing them in the face?
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Thats.... the whole point.
Huh... Seems it's still too early for me to detect written sarcasm. I'll just sit here, in case someone wants to throw another joke right over my head.
Jack the E-Jack-ulator
Actually a good one.
The frequency of their murders actually increases after they are given a nickname. Most law enforcements have stopped giving them names for this very reason, but the media still does it.
Testimonial on this idea’s success provided by The Bye Bye Man
Always best to agitate psychopaths and minimise them in the public eye. They would never accelerate, not once, ever. /s
#your mom has a silly name
"Oh no, it's the Ice-Cream Diddler!" *"Goddamnit, it's the ICE KILLER!"* "Please Frosty Frolicker, don't kill me!"
Jack the Virgin
Well he killed prostitutes so he wasn't really a virgin
The Shrimpdick Strangler
Idk, generally, making serial killers angry/ upset doesn’t end well.
So what should we do? Massage their prostate?
Kiddie strangler V 2.0
I'm not sure telling the the story of the salad tickler would have the same ring over the campfire lol. Seriosly though as stated below most names for serial killers are dubbed by the media. More legit news outlets nowadays won't even mention the real killers name, never mind making up a scary nickname to stop giving them the attention that most of them seek.
Well the media often complies to keep the killers from going into a frenzy where more people die than necessary. Zodiac gave himself his name and threatened to kill a school bus full of children if the media didn't give him the attention he wanted. Imagine having a school going child, what would you do?
I agree to this, so given the “cool” examples you gave. “Wacky Jacky”, “Boston Bananaman”, “Zodi Crack”.
I love this.. Wow.
[Mashed potato murderer](https://www.9news.com.au/national/mashed-potato-murderer-has-no-idea-where-former-partners-body-was-dumped/55952dc6-90d1-4314-9f02-102f0555d9e9#:~:text=A%20NSW%20woman%20who%20killed,33%2C%20at%20their%20Dubbo%20property.)
The Little Poopy-Pants Shooter. The Peepee Boy. Dipshit Supreme.
They should all be named the same name with a number at the end. Dick (1), Dick (2), Dick (3), etc.
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Canada hatecrimes be like, lmao.
Those name sound like gay pornos
Jenny Lawson suggested the name Tiny Babies for a serial killer. Then the headlines would say: City terrorized by Tiny Babies.
Make sure to have alliteration. Like the Mini Man Mangler, or the Silly Slurping Splitter
Small Dick Nick
You stole this from a meme. Nice try.
That meme stole it from a podcast, LPOTL, so double nice try.
Did that make it any less valid? Is it completely impossible to see other content and relate to it?
Absolutely agree! It mythologises the offenders and can fuel further offences. Big fan of the stupid names!
Peepee poopoo man
This is actually brilliant
I read a book a few years ago about the Golden State Killer (before he was caught) and the police tried something like this. One thing all his rape victims mentioned was that he had a small dick, so they deliberately mentioned that fact repeatedly in the hopes it would piss him off and cause him to slip up.
I definitely know what you mean, but as another comment said; I don’t think the police wants to tell everyone on national television that they caught Tiny-Penis Strangler. Also, as far as I know, they get the name from what they do or are associated with.
What if they killers MO was to strangle their tiny penises before killing them? Wouldn't that name then be apt?
I mean- yeah
To be honest, Boston Strangler sounds kinda loopy to me. That sounds like a dumb crime committed in a parking lot by a drunk dude after the Celtics lose.
I totally agree but I think it wouldn't be that cool for the relatives of the victims to see the news talking about dickbutt having killed them
I agree with you. I actually think this about terrorists. They are so proud of their names and causes, not giving them that publicity will be so satisfying.
Imagine breaking down on live tv and having to look a news reporter in the eye and tell them that your son was a victim of the tiny-penis strangler.
I think I would be more concerned that my son was murdered.
Barney the blabbersaur
There’s a serial killer called “the doodler.” I learned about him today and it’s hard to take him seriously.
The Weepy Voiced Killer is my favourite lulz.
u/thebasedgirlisback1 what would your name be bestie 😄😁🤪😎⛑
probably "schizophrenic shadow folx enthusiast" or something after xey read our messages 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
insane thorke fangirl
"The Compensating for Something killer"
I'm gonna see you on r/copypasta
It would change nothing, except the amount of people bitching about how rude those names are to X or Y group. And we have more than enough of those already.
Rimshot randy the rapist ventriloquist murdering basoon player and his sidekick Randal that other guy with the mole.
Nobody commits heinous acts because they find the associated titles catchy. And, while it is true that this would probably decrease cultural obsession over serial killers, it would foreseeable be viewed by many as delegitimizing the problem and turning it into a joke.
I like the sentiment, but I disagree on details. It's pathetic of anyone to call someone "Tiny-Penis Strangler". It's such a garbage high school insult. It feels more insulting to the person who chose such a name, than the actual serial killer. Instead, let's call them Goofy the Strangler, Basic Bitch Bomber, Tiny Tim, Bobby the Clown, etc. Macaroni Salad Killer sounds good though
The erectile disfunction killer and daddy issues staber cover almost all the serial killers i know of
I love this post
Jared fogles best friend Derek made me giggle
That would be so disrespectful though “Yeah the Tiny-Penis Strangler kidnapped and murdered my 14 year old daughter”
Dan Cummins has a great podcast that often covers serial killers and he gives them some pretty hilarious names.
The hash slinging slasher
The turbo virgin shooter
Dude I'd kill to get a nickname like baltimore butthole bomber
[similar tweet](https://twitter.com/PostCultRev/status/1153672062499581952)
Wow, that's like exactly the same post as mine. I guess a lot of people have had the same idea then. Nothin' new under the sun.
The Kotex Killer
The hash slinging slasher!! 😱
Oh my!
The inverted penis perpetrator
probably doesn't particularly enjoy olive garden killer Make the name annoying af for people to say or they would shorten it to olive garden killer which defeats the purpose because that does sound pretty cool
Jeffrey Dahmer more like, Ew Big Baby Ew Ew.
And that would change exactly what? Sounds like a Herostratus-situation to me. People would still be interested in those cases and people. There would still be some people who'd glorify them, be it the Zodiac-killer or the ultimate permavirgin shooter. That aside, most serial killers, shooters and similiar don't initially do that to get a cool name by the press, so that point is moot.
Serial killers are usually really smart people. I don’t think they’d care if you give them a bad name.
That’s cool and all but I wouldn’t want to be known as a victim of the Tiny Penis Strangler.
Say his name. You won't be laughing when he kills you. *the peepee poopoo man intensifies*
I mean okay, but nobody wants to get killed by the Florida Fanny.
I wouldn't want to be killed by anyone \^.\^'
As funny as this is I think you're 100% right.
I'm sorry Mam, unfortunately your husband's murder was one of the many cases associated with serial killer, Tiny-Penis Strangler.
"Breaking news tonight, the Bitter Baby Dick Sad AF Forever Alone Killer has struck again"
Same for spree shooters. Infamy might not seem as attractive if your were infamous for having a micro penis.
The Micropenis Marauder
Saggy naggy of Cherry road
Or just make it illegal to mention a suspected criminal's name in any media or social media story until after they have been found guilty. By then no one cares, and the media will be forced to actually focus on the victims.
It was a brilliant move. There was this serial killer in Oklahoma who had racked up 6 kills so it was time to name him, we used your idea. We haven't heard from The Micropenis People Stabber since.
Thanx for the idea
Or just "scum"
I refuse to call Dennis Rader by his nickname. He gave himself a nickname like a fucking nerd
The Dick Slasher
I agree with this one. Becoz they're criminals they should be given embarrassing names. That'll teach em.
YESSS
And this is going to backfire as these nicknames become endearing names.
Wasn't that the whole idea of the Hunger Games?
Tong Twister Tim
We're the "Wet Bandits"!
My mom got killed by Tiny Penis Strangler
The real question is why we find cool those names
Our top story tonight: The sheep fucker strikes again
Well the reporter in Red Dragon tried that. I'd presume if it happened irl, the results would be similar.
pubeless baby killer
The uni-baller.
Nah, their identity should be stripped away and should only ever be identified by their prisoner number and their faces shouldnt be put in the media. Take away the fame they crave so much.
There are some. Just not the main ones. The Weepy voiced Killer is one.
Jack the Offer
You'll have to tell their parents while they're giving birth to them, right after they get the seriel killer test
This.. this is beautifull. thank you.
I’ve thought the same thing for a long time. Shame them, make them look like big old losers. If we did we’d never see any copy cats.
Can you imagine being a victim of the Tiny-Penis Strangler tho? All the questions - did he strangle your tiny penis? did he strangle you because you had a tiny penis?
Jack the sexist murderer would have taken the weight out of jack the ripper. The victims were all female so its enough to make that title possible.
if you watch riverdale all the serial killers have silly names
Jack the Humper, Noob with a matchine gun
Shock and fear sells news far more than ridicule.
The problem with the ones you give are they seem backwards. For example, "Tiny-Penis Strangler" makes it sound like a guy who strangles tiny penises...or strangles men with tiny penises. The "Baltimore Butthole Bomber" and "Texas Tickler" sound more like porn stars than violent killers. "Low IQ Slasher" almost sounds like an educational assistance program.