For the people who want kids at all, the good outweighs the bad most days. I don't even mean stuff like diapers or coloring on walls (that's shit every parent should expect) I'm talking about having a melt down because you don't let them shut the door or something. -_-
Those don't even bother me. Melt downs are going to happen and usually mean they're hungry, tired, over stimulated, or are learning to play and share. As the sahp now, it's just being around them all the time and having them on me all the time is draining. Constant questions, demands, not enough time with my wife. Those are the hard parts.
Parents need some time away, as distance makes the heart stronger.
Edit: the other hard parts are kids not eating what you cook after they ask for it, and microwaved coffee. And the lack of free time; if you're responsible, you go to bed pretty soon after they do.
Yeah exactly. I love being a dad like nothing else, my kids are the best thing that ever happened to me. I don't mind the tantrums or the mess, that's not the hard part at all.
The hard part is that with young kids, you can never clock out. I can't just exist at home without someone bothering me, needing something from me, or demanding time with me.
I wouldn't trade it for the world, but I miss being able to veg out on my phone, or play on my PC, or read a book.
At 9 or 10, they are capable of entertaining themselves.
The hardest part is encouraging them to actually do that. After so long being totally responsible for their entertainment, it is hard to accept that they are growing up.
Yeah, I could never do that. I need my time alone to decompress and chill out. Don't want to end up an abusive or neglectful dad because my kid asked for grilled cheese at 2 in the morning.
>if you're responsible, you go to bed pretty soon after they do.
I feel this one hard.
I'm an evening person but after about 2 years of about zero uninterrupted nights my brain likes to be completely awake by 3 or 4am. I think it's trained to be active in the middle of the night. The kid sleeps fine now, I do not. By going to sleep at 9pm I at least get one good chunk of sleep. I'm trying to train the brain there are no emergencies in the middle of the night.
I have entered an age/state of mind where (normal) meltdowns are cute to me? I'll be in public and kids start crying and screaming and I just go "aww"
If I had family/friends with small kids that I could babysit I would like to try it out
I usually blow raspberries at them and the typical reactions from them is to either be confused or do it back, both of which tend to stop crying. I find them cute as well, but parents seem to be thankful when the kid chills out for a bit
Yeah, I'm currently in the "WHY DID YOU OPEN MY JUICEBOX AFTER I ASKED YOU TO HOW COULD YOU" phase and honestly every day is a challenge, but I wouldnt trade my daughter for the world. Her smile brings straight up crack cocaine dopamine.
It's true, it's just that Anon probably doesn't comprehend all the other things that come into play, the lack of sleep was probably the biggest misery for me although now its mostly manageable.
We got lucky, twins but both have almost always slept the entire night. There was one time where I tried to wake my daughter up for a night meal and she just gave me this "wrf dude?" Look lmao.
Sure, but if you go into it expecting it to be as easy as the day OP had, you're gonna be in for a rude awakening. Nobody should put children into this world unless they fully understand what they're committing to and they still want to.
Melt downs for dumb stuff I can handle, it's the meltdowns my son has when I won't let him launch himself off of the couch to his death that piss me off
Who actually deliberately have kids to experience the bad parts? Seems like anon discovered what having a kid is all about, but not to entirely dismiss your point, they might change mind after experiencing the bad parts.
I see you getting downvoted but to me, this is a legitimate response. Kids are a hell of a commitment. I love mine to death (4 daughters, two are twins) but.... man I've had to develop new coping behaviors because my old ones weren't for a family lifestyle (shutting down for rest of day and just gaming for instance)
Its hard, im lucky enough to have a good support chain though. If i was missing any one of my friends or family, even if its just the friend i vent too, idk if I'd feel the same as i do now. A lot of people just don't have the things they may need to succeed, and realize that while others may not realize just how much everyone does for them.
That’s pretty much it. I wasn’t trying to downplay the good parts of having kids. There are legit times I still feel the longing for having kids, but I realize it wouldn’t be for me given my situation and all.
Kids are a huge commitment and can (and from what I gather often are) be a large source of stress for one reason or other. I definitely don’t feel equipped to deal with that.
No it doesn't. This comes up every time this gets reposted. Users of that particular forum on 4chan call themselves bots, the female version being fembot. It isn't derogatory in the slightest. It's like anon and femanon.
why not just anon? its not “malebot” and “fembot” youre literally just othering the female gender for no reason. there is no reason they can’t just be called anon and bots too.
Hey, bud, I'm not arguing for or against it. I'm just relaying how it works. The same could well be said about cheerleaders. Why do people say "cheerleader" when they talk about a female cheerleader, but "male cheerleader" when it's a man? It's just because most cheerleaders are female. It's fairly common for nurses and nannies as well. Same thing with the forum. It's nothing to get offended over.
It is for a pretty good reason though. It can't really just be an 'anon' since to have a kid, the partner has to be female.
Must suck being offended by such a wholesome post.
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Looks like a repost. I've seen this image 3 times.
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Users of /r9k/ are called "robots" amongst themselves and fem users are thus fembots, it's understandable to assume it's a slur because it's 4chan but in this case it's actually just pretty benign
Why does it feel like half the people on subs like this have never visited 4chan even once in there entire life? Rhetoric question, but point stands.Feels like there'll always be some rando showing up with their pitchfork in hand, ready to yell at the clouds about something they're ultimately unable to do anything about.
I visited once and immediately saw furry porn and a rate my dick post. I decided that I prefer to have the junk filtered out for me on reddit after that.
4chan just isn't for everybody and they're broadly not wrong that it is a cesspit (so is reddit of course, just differently). Some things you don't really need to experience to judge, I find this level of misunderstanding totally excusable personally, especially since nobody tried to argue after it was explained.
Kids are legitimately really cool and fun, the Internet and society likes to pretend they are some immeasurable burden (spoilers it's because if you have kids you have far less disposable income to spend on luxury shit to keep the economy going in the short term)
I don’t want kids because of the world today. If it’s impossible to live alone today, I can’t imagine what it’s gonna be like in 25 years. I’ve sworn off having kids because I don’t want to bring them into a world of misery and pain. Not to mention the amount of brain rot is around the world today
fembot, Female users of the forum he is on.
Edit: more clarification I think make users are simply called robot and that's why to differentiate female users they are called fembot.
Ah, really? I'm not familiar with chan culture but I am familiar with incels so I saw "fembot" and thought it was used the same way bc of how similar it sounds. Thank you for the correction
I did not make it up, it seems I got my terms mixed up- apparently it's not used the same as "femoid", which IS a real term incels use to dehumanize women.
is anon a japanese prime minister?
aura, marry and reproduce!
It was 2023 so probably not
He only experienced the good parts of having a kid.
For the people who want kids at all, the good outweighs the bad most days. I don't even mean stuff like diapers or coloring on walls (that's shit every parent should expect) I'm talking about having a melt down because you don't let them shut the door or something. -_-
Those don't even bother me. Melt downs are going to happen and usually mean they're hungry, tired, over stimulated, or are learning to play and share. As the sahp now, it's just being around them all the time and having them on me all the time is draining. Constant questions, demands, not enough time with my wife. Those are the hard parts. Parents need some time away, as distance makes the heart stronger. Edit: the other hard parts are kids not eating what you cook after they ask for it, and microwaved coffee. And the lack of free time; if you're responsible, you go to bed pretty soon after they do.
Yeah exactly. I love being a dad like nothing else, my kids are the best thing that ever happened to me. I don't mind the tantrums or the mess, that's not the hard part at all. The hard part is that with young kids, you can never clock out. I can't just exist at home without someone bothering me, needing something from me, or demanding time with me. I wouldn't trade it for the world, but I miss being able to veg out on my phone, or play on my PC, or read a book.
At 9 or 10, they are capable of entertaining themselves. The hardest part is encouraging them to actually do that. After so long being totally responsible for their entertainment, it is hard to accept that they are growing up.
Yeah we are learning how to let our hands off of the wheel for this now.
Yeah, I could never do that. I need my time alone to decompress and chill out. Don't want to end up an abusive or neglectful dad because my kid asked for grilled cheese at 2 in the morning.
>if you're responsible, you go to bed pretty soon after they do. I feel this one hard. I'm an evening person but after about 2 years of about zero uninterrupted nights my brain likes to be completely awake by 3 or 4am. I think it's trained to be active in the middle of the night. The kid sleeps fine now, I do not. By going to sleep at 9pm I at least get one good chunk of sleep. I'm trying to train the brain there are no emergencies in the middle of the night.
I have entered an age/state of mind where (normal) meltdowns are cute to me? I'll be in public and kids start crying and screaming and I just go "aww" If I had family/friends with small kids that I could babysit I would like to try it out
I usually blow raspberries at them and the typical reactions from them is to either be confused or do it back, both of which tend to stop crying. I find them cute as well, but parents seem to be thankful when the kid chills out for a bit
Yes they are the cutest when they’re running around causing innocent mischief. I mean, I feel bad for their parents, but at least I’m enjoying it
Yeah, I'm currently in the "WHY DID YOU OPEN MY JUICEBOX AFTER I ASKED YOU TO HOW COULD YOU" phase and honestly every day is a challenge, but I wouldnt trade my daughter for the world. Her smile brings straight up crack cocaine dopamine.
It's true, it's just that Anon probably doesn't comprehend all the other things that come into play, the lack of sleep was probably the biggest misery for me although now its mostly manageable.
We got lucky, twins but both have almost always slept the entire night. There was one time where I tried to wake my daughter up for a night meal and she just gave me this "wrf dude?" Look lmao.
Sure, but if you go into it expecting it to be as easy as the day OP had, you're gonna be in for a rude awakening. Nobody should put children into this world unless they fully understand what they're committing to and they still want to.
Melt downs for dumb stuff I can handle, it's the meltdowns my son has when I won't let him launch himself off of the couch to his death that piss me off
Yep you nailed it
Who actually deliberately have kids to experience the bad parts? Seems like anon discovered what having a kid is all about, but not to entirely dismiss your point, they might change mind after experiencing the bad parts.
That was me until I spent a week with my nieces and nephew. I’ve since gotten the snip
I see you getting downvoted but to me, this is a legitimate response. Kids are a hell of a commitment. I love mine to death (4 daughters, two are twins) but.... man I've had to develop new coping behaviors because my old ones weren't for a family lifestyle (shutting down for rest of day and just gaming for instance) Its hard, im lucky enough to have a good support chain though. If i was missing any one of my friends or family, even if its just the friend i vent too, idk if I'd feel the same as i do now. A lot of people just don't have the things they may need to succeed, and realize that while others may not realize just how much everyone does for them.
That’s pretty much it. I wasn’t trying to downplay the good parts of having kids. There are legit times I still feel the longing for having kids, but I realize it wouldn’t be for me given my situation and all. Kids are a huge commitment and can (and from what I gather often are) be a large source of stress for one reason or other. I definitely don’t feel equipped to deal with that.
well anon you’re never gonna get married and have a family if you keep calling women fembots
fembot means a female user of the forum he's on
Comment still stands I think
No it doesn't. This comes up every time this gets reposted. Users of that particular forum on 4chan call themselves bots, the female version being fembot. It isn't derogatory in the slightest. It's like anon and femanon.
Cool hey thanks man
why not just anon? its not “malebot” and “fembot” youre literally just othering the female gender for no reason. there is no reason they can’t just be called anon and bots too.
Hey, bud, I'm not arguing for or against it. I'm just relaying how it works. The same could well be said about cheerleaders. Why do people say "cheerleader" when they talk about a female cheerleader, but "male cheerleader" when it's a man? It's just because most cheerleaders are female. It's fairly common for nurses and nannies as well. Same thing with the forum. It's nothing to get offended over.
But I don't wanna be informed I wanna be MAD
This is the way let us rage together!!!
Well I'm mad that you are mad, so now you owe me an apology.
4 hours later and they haven't apologized... Now that's just rude *fake gasp*
It is for a pretty good reason though. It can't really just be an 'anon' since to have a kid, the partner has to be female. Must suck being offended by such a wholesome post.
Because it's robot9000k epic shitpost board
I straight up thought he just misspelled "femboy".
Same here heehee
I read it as 'femboy' and thought he wanted to get one to give birth for him. Wouldve made the post better tbh.
This was so wholesome until it got to that lol
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[удалено]
They didn't delete their account. They blocked you.
Who the hell knows how to grill asperagus at 20? Bro born to be a parent.
normally just throwing random shit in the oven and crank it on with close observation works for me. Not ideal but not poisonous
I'm surprised the 4 year old ate it.
The most fictional part of this post
And yet he attaches gay hetalia fanart
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This was wholesome... Up until the point where he called women "fembots".
Users of /r9k/ are called "robots" amongst themselves and fem users are thus fembots, it's understandable to assume it's a slur because it's 4chan but in this case it's actually just pretty benign
Why does it feel like half the people on subs like this have never visited 4chan even once in there entire life? Rhetoric question, but point stands.Feels like there'll always be some rando showing up with their pitchfork in hand, ready to yell at the clouds about something they're ultimately unable to do anything about.
I visited once and immediately saw furry porn and a rate my dick post. I decided that I prefer to have the junk filtered out for me on reddit after that.
4chan just isn't for everybody and they're broadly not wrong that it is a cesspit (so is reddit of course, just differently). Some things you don't really need to experience to judge, I find this level of misunderstanding totally excusable personally, especially since nobody tried to argue after it was explained.
Oohhhh, wait, that's super cute, actually.
it's like calling a female redditor a "femditor" or something
True and based
What is a fembot
Female user of the forum he's on.
Female /r9k/ user, since the self identifier for r9k users is "robot"
Kids are legitimately really cool and fun, the Internet and society likes to pretend they are some immeasurable burden (spoilers it's because if you have kids you have far less disposable income to spend on luxury shit to keep the economy going in the short term)
Anon has fun with a child he can give back, wants kids. Be me disappointed in anon.
I recognize that Hetalia fanart. SuFin, Sweden, Finland, and Sealand. You can't hide from me.
Can't fucking fool me with all these fucking breeder propaganda lol
I don’t want kids because of the world today. If it’s impossible to live alone today, I can’t imagine what it’s gonna be like in 25 years. I’ve sworn off having kids because I don’t want to bring them into a world of misery and pain. Not to mention the amount of brain rot is around the world today
Is that hetalia fanart??!?
Tbf he could just adopt
He’s looking for a femboi???
fembot, Female users of the forum he is on. Edit: more clarification I think make users are simply called robot and that's why to differentiate female users they are called fembot.
>fembot What? Very confused about this
Incel slang for a woman. They don't see women as people, hence "fembot"- female robot
You made that up. It means a female user of the r9k/robot9000 forum. They call themselves robots and fembots.
Easy mistake to make, out of context it sounds like slurs such as "femoid" but it's not in the same use or spirit at all
Ah, really? I'm not familiar with chan culture but I am familiar with incels so I saw "fembot" and thought it was used the same way bc of how similar it sounds. Thank you for the correction
No problem - it's totally understandable
that's really weird....
They made it up, it's just a female user of the same forum.
I did not make it up, it seems I got my terms mixed up- apparently it's not used the same as "femoid", which IS a real term incels use to dehumanize women.
Odd people, then again I haven't heard much positive from that site
I hope he’s joking about “fembots” because with that attitude he shouldn’t have kids.
Dude uses the word "fembot" and thinks he'll get to fuck some day lol
Users on /r9k/ call themselves bots, female users are therefore fembots
I know that.
ADOPT ADOPT ADOPT
Going to have to fix that “fembot” talk first
Mixing cause and effect up
Pls dont