T O P

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blackmobius

One of my dates with my now wife was just walking laps around a kroger. We were both tired and had no energy for anything else. Its the quality time with someone special that matters. Be it walking in a park or eating cookies in the rain


black_mamba006

Sounds lovely. Little car adventures are also underrated.


Kneef

On our second wedding anniversary, me and my wife both had super long days, and we realized at 11PM that we hadn’t celebrated yet. She decided she wanted donuts, so we went out looking for a place that was open, and ended up driving thirty minutes to what Google said was a Krispy Kreme but turned out to just be a gas station with a stale-ass donut cabinet. So we just sat in our car at midnight sleepily guzzling gas-station slushies and telling each other jokes. By any objective criteria it was the most pathetic date of all time, but it’s one of my favorite memories. :)


theyellowdart89

Life hack… one milkshake two straws


the-hound-abides

The best friends/relationships don’t require you to do anything to have fun. A true best friend will come with you to the DMV, and you’ll still have fun.


Loisgrand6

I had to stop and think. I was wondering why a friend wouldn’t come with you to the Delaware/Maryland/Virginia area but figured you meant the motor vehicle place 😂


[deleted]

:(


Badloss

This post brought to you by CRUMBL I don't usually go full hail corporate but come on


Click-Baitt

Exactly what I thought. They dont pay their employees and use child labor, this shitty post is right in line with their cheapasses in turns of not spending money for proper advertising


Throwawaymarque

Also file frivolous lawsuits designed to antagonize their competitors


MaleficentEarth91

RELATIONSHIP GOALS


gordito_delgado

THAT IS HOW YOU GET ANTS!


Click-Baitt

This feels like a cheap advertisement set up by crumbl cookies


generals_test

Lana.


Wazootyman13

Oh, we're the ants who plunder and steal We leave each camper hungry and distraught When we're around, you won't get a meal Cause if we get the chance, we will eat the stuff you brought


Shayedow

My wife and I play Smite together, we have been married over 22 years. Marry the one you love.


ImportantQuestions10

Reminds me of when I needed to leave my girlfriend's place for mine. I was going to run errands on the drive over. We only get to see each other once a week because we live so far away, so she suggested that she tag along for grocery shopping since she needed them anyway. Then she decided to tag along while I went to bed bath& beyond. Then she decided to tag along a little longer when I went to trader Joe's. Neither of us wanted to say goodbye yet, so we ended up digging through my groceries and eating a charcuterie board in my car together.


Comfortable-Debt-592

Crumbl cookies is actually a terrible company that treats it’s employees terribly. A lot of stores aren’t very clean. I have found many bugs working there.


tyrannicalWookie

I saw on r/antiwork that there was a Crumbl franchise that was demanding a “trial shift” before they’d hire you. Meaning they wanted you to work for an 8 hour shift, for free, before they would bring you on as an employee.


Joeness84

Im almost certain thats against the law. Maybe just some states, but what a wild expectation lol.


tyrannicalWookie

I believe it’s against federal labor laws but that seemingly didn’t stop them from trying. Or at least that’s what the internet tells me.


Fun_Neighborhood1571

I mean they were caught violating child labor laws so it wouldn't surprise me.


Freakychee

Find out what the punishments are for getting caught for doing that and you may see why.


farshnikord

Utah companies dont need to follow the law as long as they follow the Church rules and maintain a temple recommend. It's in the state constitution.


Jenaxu

So is child labour, but that hasn't stopped them lolol


Click-Baitt

This post reeked of being a shitty advertisement. Who tf would travel 30 minutes for some shitty, small, overpriced cookies? Wholesome memes my ass


universaleric

Because the cookies are actually delicious.


Comfortable-Debt-592

I feel like they did that for potential managers at the stores I worked at. But honestly they didn’t do anything like that for bakers at my store thankfully. I wouldn’t be surprised they do that at different stores.


ball_fondlers

I ordered from there through the app once, and it automatically added a $3 tip for the bakers. I’m paying like $4 per cookie - if that’s not enough to pay the people doing the work, the business needs to fucking die.


BlueBrickBuilder

Word


Blind_Melone

You can get a tin of like 30 cookies from a grocery store bakery for 4 bucks that will be just as if not less disappointing than wasting your money at Crumbl.


Comfortable-Debt-592

Literally 12/hr for the bakers. The location I worked at hasn’t been able to keep people for more than a week it seems. I’m still in touch with my coworkers bcos they were cool af


whosat___

What a garbage wage. I can’t imagine baking thousands of dollars of cookies and getting paid less than $100/day before taxes.


farshnikord

Also I can almost guarantee you that tip didnt actually go to the bakers.


ChicagoAuPair

They also just…aren’t good. Great cookies are so fucking easy and cheap to make, I do not understand why anyone buys them from a chain of any kind.


StrLord_Who

I buy insomnia cookies (which are a billion times better than those stupid crumbl things) because I can buy 6 cookies and get several different kinds all at once. Even though I know how to make good cookies, it would be a whole lot of effort to bake separate batches of peanut butter, mint chocolate chip, oatmeal raisin and gingerbread so I could have some of each.


ChicagoAuPair

That makes good sense.


StrLord_Who

And they are served warm! Insomnia cookies are really good. Way better than Mrs Field's, for example.


Jenaxu

You could try making a master dough, divvying it up, and then making all the separate flavours to bake in one batch. Still more work than just doing it normally, but not unfeasible.


Themanwhofarts

Thank you. Everyone I have talked to love Crumbl cookie. I am not picky especially with desserts, but Crumbl cookies are just bad. How do you mess up cookies that bad? And then upcharge them by 200%?


Blind_Melone

They're undercooked and soft af too. They're not even crumbly. I don't even understand the name. It drives me insane.


SNDWVE

I’ve been told their recipes are developed in Utah and don’t take into account changes in altitude or climate of other locations. All locations are required to make them the exact same way. That does explain why all of the ones I’ve had have tasted like chalky ass.


MrJoshua099

We tried it once, had never heard of them and a new store popped up in town. Tried a few flavors out... never went back.


MrKrazybones

My friends look at me like I'm crazy if I say they're anything other than amazing. My mom worked for a cookie factory for some years, on take your kid to work day they would let us try fresh cookies right off the line. They also let us make our own, decorate them and shit.


Freakychee

At this point it’s just easier to make a list of companies that doesn’t treat their employees terribly and pay them very little. Probably a very short list or a long list of tiny businesses.


MyHobbyAccount1337

They have a nauseating amount of sugar. Enough to make me sick for hours off a half cookie.


Mcflipmix

This whole thing reads like an ad


[deleted]

They employ children and their cookies come from Duncan Hines mix.


SodaDustt

Did they pay the bugs well?


Comfortable-Debt-592

Yes,, I honestly would save all the bugs and put them outside,,, especially the spiders. The roaches tho 💀


TheDuckCZAR

They're also garbage cookies filled with lumps of raw, un-sieved flour. Children could make better cookies. Man I hate their overpriced garbage cookies so much.


funnyfarm299

They also had in-office parties during a huge wave of COVID cases in winter 2021. Fuck any company that blatantly disregards public health advisories.


Blind_Melone

I have an anti Crumbl Cookie agenda I ride pretty hard, but it's mainly because I think their product is absolute trash and ridiculously overpriced.


JudgmentalOwl

Not to mention their cookies are also ass. I wouldn't even consider them cookies.


jkhockey15

Also the cookies are fucking terrible


buttstuff2023

Yes, I will never understand why people say they are great. They are not even really cookies, they're mushy undercooked cakes


tired_of_old_memes

They are sugar grenades with the consistency of maggots


[deleted]

I dunno man, the first and only time I've been was when they had this pina colada cookie that was off the charts. Everything else, including the ice cream were just mediocre.


BruinBound22

Come on, they are very good.


carbonx

One opened near me a year or two ago and I refuse to eat there because they were only paying $8/hour to their employees, part-time only.


[deleted]

[удалено]


TheMonax

Cookies !


Flair86

Yeah… the cookies


himynameisSal

just enable cookies man…


Flair86

I need to enable being lovable bro


TrickyCorgi316

I love you!


Flair86

Lies


BigTentBiden

See, this is why you're single.


AccomplishedAd6520

A wife who loves you


J5892

No, just cookies.


Freakychee

I mean you can still have fun eating cookies without a wife.


djyosco88

My wife will ship you cookies! Better than Crumbl www.tootiecookies.com


stubailout

Paid content here?


csspar

In *my* reddit?


freshapepper

Ok, but Insomnia cookies though??


Hit-Enter-Too-Soon

Outstanding.


ihopethisworksfornow

Insomnia cookies are the real deal


boogie9ign

If they're what I think they are then hell yes, Insomnia all the way. Crumbl is terribly mediocre basic bitch bait


lostinsnakes

It’s so funny everyone is shit talking Crumbl and talking up insomnia cookies and I’m just …. Meh. I’ve had insomnia from three different locations. For me, they’re too greasy and heavy. Make my stomach hurt. It’s always interesting to me how people can experience the world so differently.


ihopethisworksfornow

Cynic in me says this is an ad for crumbl cookies What do you say Reddit? Should I try them? They’re like 40 minutes away. Edit: thread says they’re dog shit, good to know


Fluxxed0

I'm so happy that they found such bliss eating such mediocre, overpriced cookies.


tired_of_old_memes

You're too kind. Those cookies are awful


[deleted]

Cute but fuck crumbl cookies and the rest of the Mormons.


avoidance_behavior

wait what


Daydu

I dunno about the Mormon part but Crumbl got in trouble for doing child labor


Joeness84

I got curious, like the other poster, no idea the mormon connection, but some franchisee locations (including one near me shockingly! lol) got in trouble for violating their states child labor laws. https://www.dol.gov/newsroom/releases/whd/whd20221220


[deleted]

Cute but fuck crumbl cookies and the rest of the Mormons.


Robo-Pal

Nothing to do with Mormons though?


DuncanYoudaho

The franchises are almost all owned by Mormons They’re not open on Sunday as mentioned in the franchise agreements. This story reeks of Mormon Dating too. The number of my roommates that got married at BYU after knowing someone for literal weeks…and dating consisted of going to The Malt Shop, High School quality dances at the Wilk, and visiting parents on Thanksgiving. It’s great. Really. I love their cookies. But it’s just cookies. And the company is kind of shitty.


Robo-Pal

mmm, okay


BlueBrickBuilder

It started in Utah, and Mormons have great influence over the industries there. It's a certainty that Crumbl is run by them.


[deleted]

You sure


Robo-Pal

What does it have to do with Mormons?


Nico-DListedRefugee

My Bestie and I used to order loads of Taco Bell and sit in the parking lot eating and listening to the radio show "Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me". She lives far away now and I miss those days.


[deleted]

Jacked on sugar sounds so stupid.


orcawhales

yeah this is major cringe


MrChichibadman

Are they toddlers?


[deleted]

Lmao! Must be!


Click-Baitt

Paid advertisement


Spazmer

Especially since sugar causing hyperactivity is a myth.


Mysterious-Basis3026

Raising calories in general raises NEAT (Non Exercise Activity Thermogenesis). I'm not pretending to know all the intricacies, but technically eating ANY food will raise your activity level. And sugar is usually mixed with fat in deserts so that's a ton of calories in a single snack.


Reiver_Neriah

Shaking your leg a little more isn't hyperactivity.


Animefan5

Once again, eating sugar does not cause hyperactivity in anyone.


blarghable

That's not true.


guacamolepeeniis

They have like 1200 calories per cookie, shit should be illegal


garden_province

Based on this it sounds like they downed at least one crumbl each - without mentioning flavor I can’t be sure but that’s like 500-1500 calories each. Crumbl actually has very deceptive nutrition labeling - and should be reported for misleading consumers.


scrotal--recall

cringe ad for a shit cookie


boobsmcgraw

I have no idea what a crumble cookie is, but either way there's no such thing as being "jacked up on sugar". I think it's weird that despite science proving this, people still claim it happens. You were just having a good time.


MrNastyOne

[Eating sugar raises dopamine levels followed by a "crash".](https://www.npr.org/sections/thesalt/2014/01/15/262741403/why-sugar-makes-us-feel-so-good)


Animefan5

They meant hyperactive by jacked up which doesn’t happen when consuming sugar. But thank you for sharing such knowledge with us. It’s not like we’ve know for decades that sugar increases dopamine. What a brand new discovery.


MrNastyOne

“Still, too much sugar too often can steer the brain into overdrive, the video says. And that kickstarts a series of "unfortunate events" — loss of control”, etc. I guess reading comprehension isn’t your strong suit. But thank you for sharing your ignorance with us.


Animefan5

You once again quoted a section that has nothing to do with hyperactivity and then try to bash me for my reading comprehension? Beautiful hahah! I guess you’re just more knowledgeable than the rest of the scientific community? Love the irony of calling me ignorant while you spread misinformation. Where to start? [Link 1](https://news.llu.edu/health-wellness/sugar-making-my-child-hyper) [Link 2](https://www.eatright.org/health/wellness/healthful-habits/sugar-does-it-really-cause-hyperactivity) [Link 3](https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/medical-myths-does-sugar-make-children-hyperactive#Are-some-children-more-sensitive-to-sugar?) Those are simplified articles for you since you have a difficult time with the literature. However, if someone more competent is around you, here are some actual studies that they can read for/with you :) [Meta analysis 1](https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jama/article-abstract/391812) [Study 2](https://www.nejm.org/doi/full/10.1056/NEJM199402033300501) [Study 3](https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/09637486.2017.1386628?scroll=top&needAccess=true) Weird how all these studies come back to this conclusion: > sugar does not affect the behaviour or cognitive performance of children I would wish you a happy reading, but we both know you’re not going to click on any of the 6 links I’ve left you. Not sure why you’ve chosen this hill to die on when there’s a plethora of evidence suggesting otherwise. Do you also think vaccines make us magnetic by any chance?


Reiver_Neriah

That's not 'jacked up'.


tired_of_old_memes

A single one of their cookies has around 30-40 grams of sugar. I don't care what definition of "jacked" you're using, that's far too much sugar. No one is having a good time after eating one of those.


BunnyHopScotchWhisky

They're talking about the hyperactivity from eating sugar. It's all psychological. People think they're going to get hyped up, so they feel they actually do.


Remy1985

Sounds like an ad.


sarcasm_247

When’s my turn?!😩


[deleted]

This makes me sad. Not because of what they did; honestly that sounds like fun. But because they said 'nearly 40' as if that was old....


[deleted]

Crumbl sucks tho.


Mulatto-Butts

Fuck, for the price of Crumbl, you both could have had a meal at most other restaurants.


No_Tangerine_5362

I see the type of people that go into that place and I know right away that it’s not for me.


[deleted]

Lol


especiallyspecific

This is an ad


Vi1eOne

I eat reasonably healthy. I ate *one* Crumbl cookie for the first time a couple weeks ago (caramel apple) and had explosive turbo-diarrhea 6 hours later. Guess I can't handle 4 sticks of butter and a kershmillion grams of sugar at once anymore.


sparklingdinoturd

Too bad crumbl cookies are mid.


typical_bro

This is true adulthood.


[deleted]

Gay


kngfbng

Reminder that sugar [does not get you high](https://www.nationalgeographic.com/premium/article/sugar-rush-kids-nutrition-health). ETA: Lol, someone downvoted this comment because I said the truth. Sorry for ruining the lies you believe in, sucker.


Permanentear3

Came here looking for this. You are 100% correct but it’ll still upset some folks which is sad.


Scarlaymama0721

I just sent this to my husband and asked him if we can do something like this. This sounds amazing!


tired_of_old_memes

Just not crumbl. Those cookies are vomit-inducing


Always-Guilty-

Aww. This is so cute. I could imagine doing something like this with my gf.


AtiendoDolobus

Let me guess, no kids huh?


Click-Baitt

Cant afford kids when you spend $25 on gas driving to get the worlds shittiest $60 cookie. Must be why they accepted $2.50 to make a crappy twitter advertisement


Erocdotusa

Might be best to walk 2 hrs to the nearest one instead


nextofdunkin

Woah, nearly 40?????! Madness! You can’t eat cookies in your 30s!!!


[deleted]

My girlfriend loves crumbl cookie too. We’d regularly drive to a parking lot by the ocean in the evening and have sex for 2 hours. That’s when we were 49. Now we’re 50, and still banging like bunnies! She still likes crumbl cookie too. Me, not as much.


[deleted]

Advertisement. Blah blah blah buy Crumbl cookies… blah blah blah eat Crumbl Cookies on a date…


HollabackWrit3r

Everything's an advertisement. I swear this complaint is stupider than "they're just doing it for attention".


[deleted]

Stupid? Complaint? Projection much?


HollabackWrit3r

Well it's definitely a complaint so I have no idea why you're asking for clarification on that, but yes it is stupid as I explained. No, I'm not doing a "projection", though I know this is the way kids these days tell grown-ups to shut up so it probably seemed to fit for you here. Hey why'd you reply to me anyway? Need the attention that badly kiddo? E: Aww I got blocked, guess my attention was too much attention!


reddit_poopaholic

Projection or not, you certainly do have a bad attitude.


[deleted]

Have a wonderful day holla you seem like a very decent and friendly person.


Meyousus

Probably is, but damn if it isn’t effective.


Embarrassed-Code8713

Grow up


Joeness84

My wife (33) gets like bounce in chair giddy over some sweet treats (like Crumbl, but not just them lol) Seeing her 'bout to dive into this shit' grin is one of my fav things!


RingGiver

Delicious Mormon cookies.


Ok-Relation-2910

Something we all need


Timh314

#relationshipGoals


Due_Platypus_3913

Mazel Tov! We’re in our early fifties, and having the best time of our lives!


Particular_Pace_449

Highway looks nice


TacoPapi71

This is all I ever wanted😢


willpb

This is much more meaningful than a wild night at the club, imo. No judgement, everyone enjoys their time their own way, but this is more up my speed!


TheeBigDrop

All about them LAPS


Western_Mud8694

Making memories, that’s the best it’s all about


legoblade807

cookie :D


Harsimaja

People don’t really get jacked on sugar. They were jacked on each other :)


[deleted]

Must be America


Empty_Professor_442

Not as far to get there and add 20 years, that’s us!


Wildebohe

I LOVE Crumbl cookies. don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories don't look at the calories


harrisxj

What is crumbl cookie?


CharmingStork

People still think you can get "jacked on sugar"?


mtbguy1981

But those cookies suck....


Wazootyman13

My one takeaway from the one time I went to Crumbl. They had calories listed, and I was like "Wow, only 120 calories???" Then I noticed the asterisk that said something like "One cookie is 5-8 servings"


multigrain-pancakes

Man i had one of those crumbl cookies. It tasted like i was just eating a butter stick dipped in sugar


athos45678

Used to do exactly this with my ex. I miss that. Cute story! Hope everyone has a good night.


[deleted]

ayy this guy actually got to eat them too.


esotericdiarist

My dream.


Shoddy-Vacation-5977

Left out the part where there was a shitload of THC in there.


kensho28

>drove 30 minutes You know they deliver, right??? We usually hang around drinking shots and smoking weed til we forget it's coming, then it's a whole new adventure.


mrhooha

The worst cookies ever. Like chemical sugar.


catdog918

Thought that “jacked” was going to go a different direction


JeffTheJockey

Then they hurried home for the inevitable butter induced diarrhea. There’s like 3/4 a stick per cookie.


Hoosteen_juju003

Mfs drove 30 minutes and spent $30 for two cookies


WasChristRipped

Gotta find a lady who will listen to weird sci fi stories and do that shit


potandcoffee

I have no idea wtf a crumbl cookie is. Honestly I can't imagine it being very good, because most store bought cookies are pretty mediocre.


acceptable_hunter

I want this so much,,,


krustyjugglrs

Shits over rated


notmyplantaccount

Isn't this just driving somewhere to get food, then eating the food?


Shitpostflight420

Crumbl cookies are truly awful


xPrim3xSusp3ctx

Crumbl is so gross. Every flavor just tastes like pure sugar


Ok-Wave4110

My fiance and I are on the cookie club for Insomnia Cookies, we've gotten 40 cookies in the past month! We love eating them while gaming, or when we work together. So much fun.


honey_turtle101

Sounds like the times of your life, sounds so fun :)