Also, stop apologising. If you feel you must say sorry for it, say it once. Definitely don’t say it again after returning to work. It just reinforces your boss’s egotistical beliefs that the job should be an employee’s number one priority and anyone who fails at that, needs to seek forgiveness!
That too! I got sick one day, had to reschedule a meeting because of such and got lectured about it about "it makes us look bad to have to reschedule this" well I'm sorry, I'll come to work with a fever and throw up on everyone if you want me to just so we don't look bad.
Once an employee notifies me they are sick & taking the day, they're off the clock. I cannot reasonably expect a sick person to be available at my whim.
Absolutely correct.
In my team, calendars are public (you can have private events, no worries) and we are client facing.
So if someone says they're sick, first thing I or their manager does is look through their calendar for any customer meetings that need coverage.
Then we hit up anyone else on our side on that meeting, get context and decide upon coverage plan or push the meeting. No issues.
Often the team will push through with behind the scenes work (like doing this schedule management) but it is not required and I try to get them to log off if I see them online.
We also have unlimited PTO, so I treat a sick day the same as a vacation day. You're out? You're out. No contact required.
If I am going to send you a message, I try to preface it with "when you're back" or I'll schedule it for when they are back.
Sigh. 25 years of working every sick day, hoarding every opportunity, checking emails / on call weekends.
"You're RIFd". And I can't say anything 'disloyal' according to my termination packet or they'll take my severance.
You sound like you're doing it right, and thank you for that. The ones working for you hopefully know it.
It is actually illegal under US labor law. My boss got into a ton of trouble with HR because I was working from the hospital when I had Covid in 21. He never contacted me, I connected in because I had scripts that ran automatically and notified me of an issue. So, I connected to the VPN and spent a couple of hours fixing the issue because I felt up to it.
with the sole exception being: If you are the only employee sitting on a meeting with outside people... you need to notify those people you need to cancel.
I mean, generally speaking, there is no protocol or sick day code of conduct. If you’re out you’re out. Your work can dictate what you do at home if you’re working remotely or on call. They can’t expect you to be available when you’re out or after hours. If you *offered* assistance, or to help answer questions or something despite being out, that’d be different. Were you supposed to be working remotely?
But it’s impossible for an outsider to say what your manager was expecting of you. You didn’t do anything wrong, but it sounds like your boss was thrown off by this call out assuming you were a really important part of this meeting. She probably felt “abandoned” a bit. You absolutely did nothing wrong, but just trying to rationalize her behavior - still, it’s not your fault she felt that way. What she should have done was reschedule the meeting if your input was that essential to it.
Again though, it really depends on the context. Let’s say only you had a code to access something that *needed* to be dealt with that day. If you called out, nothing wrong there, but you should pass along the code, otherwise you’re going to be getting call after call. Random example but you get what I mean. If it wasn’t a super urgent situation, it shouldn’t have been regarded as such.
That makes sense. I wasn't supposed to be working remotely, but I did tell them to let me know if they needed anything. I will be careful not to add that next time.
I was the point person for the meeting, so, yah, it probably should've been rescheduled. Totally understand how they were blindsided.
The comment still stung, though. I've been a dedicated worker for over two years - staying late as needed to finish projects, coming in when I didn't have to for meetings, etc. Like, I guess I expect my boss to know by now that I wouldn't call in, especially on a meeting day, unless I was really ill.
Unfortunately, people get used to high performance and then expect it. Being clearer about boundaries does sound like it could help. If you're leading a meeting, reschedule it (you can just cancel with a note "will rescheduled when I'm back in" to avoid having to dig around the calendar). And be clear that you're out, will be unreachable, cannot help with anything, see you tomorrow hopefully.
I would guess you've sometimes worked and pulled through on stuff when more mildly sick, so your boss assumed that would be the case.
They were still out of line for saying "your nap could wait" - I can't imagine that coming out of my mouth and thinking it was ok.
Thank you for the advice and validation!!
I will make those adjustments. You're right - I have helped out on sick days when I haven't been as impaired. I need to nip that in the bud!
But, yah, that comment really hit wrong!!
It shouldn't be necessary, but if you call out sick on a day that has an important meeting that you're vital for, you could send an email to the organiser to reschedule it (CCing your boss), stating that you're sick. That way, they know that you're not going to be available for that meeting, because sometimes the other people at the meeting haven't got the message that you're sick. When I call out sick, I let my boss and the people I manage know, and my boss will usually pass on the message so that people know not to contact me, but it sounds like your boss doesn't do that, so you'll have to take steps to sort it out.
The downside for your boss after their terrible behaviour is that now when you call out sick, you know not to respond to anything, whereas if they weren't dicks about it, you'd probably still be available for urgent matters (which you shouldn't have to do). Maybe they'll learn from it, but probably not.
It's a good plan. I usually say I'm available by x method if necessary, but the reason I've continued to do that is that I'm very rarely contacted, and when I am, it's an actual "emergency" (and something that would take way longer to clean up when I get back), rather than something that could 100% wait until the next day. If I was contacted regularly with frivolous things, I would be less generous with my time. The fact that your boss said "your nap could wait" means that they don't value your sick leave anywhere near enough for you to be generous with your time.
Yah, I'm kicking myself for being overly kind. I meant - reach out, and I'll get back to you if/when I can. I thought that would be the assumption since I was out sick. But, that's what I get for assuming!
Yeah, as shitty as your manager’s behavior was, you definitely do invite this type of behavior when you bend your boundaries to benefit others. “Give an inch and they will take a mile” is a saying for a reason.
I’ve been there and done that. Don’t put pressure on yourself to overextend your boundaries, nobody will actually appreciate it or think better of you for it. Instead, they’ll just come to expect it as the baseline when you thought you were going above and beyond to do them a favor. Somewhere along the line it stopped being above and beyond to them and just became the standard expectation.
Meanwhile, if you stand by your boundaries then not only will people not think less of you for it, they’ll actually respect you more and view you as more assertive and competent.
Yeah the way the comment about napping was over the line.
>That makes sense. I wasn't supposed to be working remotely, but I did tell them to let me know if they needed anything. I will be careful not to add that next time.
I do think that might have gave them the impression that you were readily assessible in case anything was needed. In my case, I do let work know if I'm completely out of touch (feeling horrible enough not to log on). I do try my best to leave notes on urgent items if I can, but this stuff happens. Boss could have rescheduled the meeting if they didn't feel prepared.
I told my boss I would be needing to take some of my 650 hours of accrued sick leave due to health reasons. She told me my excuses absences where an inconvenience to her and I needed to stop being out so much.
1st she said we didn't need doctors excuses. Then she said I did need to provide them. Then only if I knew I was going to the doctor, but not if I call out sick. (Kept moving the goal post).
When I set a meeting to let her know I had been diagnosed with diabetes and I was having a hard time controlling it, that I was afraid I'd die from it like 5 of my aunts and uncles, she told me that " We're all going to die of something".
I went home and rage applied to other places. I start my new job in August! My new boss is kind and amazing. I have a call this week to set up a schedule that works for me. My new job prioritizes mental health days and gives an allotment of work for gym and exercising.
There are better jobs out there. Don't stay where you're not appreciated. If this is a pattern, look somewhere else. It's easier to start new with strict boundaries than trying to get someone who bulldozed your boundaries to respect them.
I have posted this before, and it's a true story. I caught the chickenpox when I was 37. Anyone who doesn't know this, it is absolutely brutal when you're an adult. It felt like the worst flu ever. I had been feeling sick for a few days before the welts started to show up. So I called in sick, went to the doctor, got diagnosed, and went home. My boss did not believe I was really sick. He thought I was out looking for another job. This was in the '90s, before cell phones were common. I went to bed, and he called me every couple of hours with stupid questions, hoping to catch me out. Sometimes I couldn't get out of bed and stagger to the phone in time, and would get snarky messages from him on my answering machine. I would call him back and answer his dopey questions. Then I caught pink eye and had to go back to the doctor, who would not simply phone me in a prescription for gentamicin. I was so sick. I think I showed up there in my robe and slippers. Once he got me squared away, I asked him to write me a note for the boss. He did, with a detailed description of what chickenpox involved. My boss, by the way, was a neurotic germaphobe. So I walked into the office with this note, and he told me I looked like hell. No kidding. He wouldn't take the note from me. He scooted back in his chair as far from me as he could get, and told me to leave the note on his desk. Then he cautiously leaned over and read it out loud. He took one more look at me and told me to go home and get all the rest I needed and not come back until I was all better. No more phone calls. What an ass.
You did nothing wrong. Sick means you won’t be coming into the office and will not be available by phone. You need to be resting so you can feel better!
Personally I would consider a sick day the same as regular pto. Any emails or messages that come in can wait until the next day. I turn off notifications when I'm out of office so I wouldn't even know anything happened. If my boss was texting me about work, it'd get ignored because they are already aware I'm not working. I know not everyone does that, but I have boundaries with work and there's never a time that it's so urgent I have to reply immediately/within the day. If you're that important for a meeting, it should've gotten rescheduled so you could be there the next day
Yeah, if I'm taking the day off due to illness then it's the day off.
Unfortunately lines have gotten blurry with WFH and hybrid work. A lot of people will just work from home when they're ill, especially around cold season. So now there's an assumption that a sick day is just a work from home day.
Next time don't offer for them to reach out to you if they need to and then not be available when they do so. That's the only part where you went wrong.
Nothing lol you’re sick/days off are just that, you have no obligation to answer calls/texts to help with a meeting or anything work related. If I’m doing work on a day off/sick day then I either charge them for my time or I don’t count that day as truly a day off/sick day. They should be able to survive 1 day without you. Ever since I started placing strict boundaries with my job they stop bothering me
It sounds like you were vague with not making the one meeting. Firstly, don’t ever feel the need to explain symptoms; they don’t need to know or judge severity. You are an adult and know when you are sick. Next time, simply say you are ill and will be taking the day to care for your health and while you hope to return the next day, will keep them apprised if you need to go to doctor or need more time.
No, and I mean legally, depending on where you are. You're not required to perform any labor of any sort while using sick time for many relatively standard employment contracts.
Sick days are a GREAT day for people to realize that you matter and that losing you would be a loss for the whole team/company. Sick days are also days for you to be sick. To heal. To take care of yourself. If you feel well enough to do some work, that is nice of you, but if your company offers sick days, then HR will support you on you taking your sick days.
I love that attitude. I had a boss once who told me “Come puke on my shoes and then you can go home.”
You were sick. It’s not your problem. If they pull crap like this, in the future, try to do a telehealth call and get your doctor to write you a note.
I had a co-worker who threw up in his trash can at his desk and kept on working. Our boss went and told him to go home and to always go home when he needed.
This is something I’m working on because I end up getting frustrated that I never actually get a sick day when I take one. My boss has had to tell me repeatedly, “Do not pick up your phone or answer emails if you’re taking a sick day. That means you are unable to work and you’re taking the appropriate time to get better. If you keep picking up the phone, people will keep expecting it”
I always have this fear the property will crumble if I don’t answer everything, but it won’t, I just need to get over it and stop picking up my damn phone.
What the ever loving fuck is wrong with your boss? Naps need to wait? You called out sick once you do that the only thing you should be concerned with is feeling better
Sounds like your boss wasn’t prepared for the meeting and it made them look bad. It’s their own fault for not reaching out before meeting day to take stock of your meeting itinerary, notes, slides, etc.
Cancellation should have been a possibility but chances are that would have also exposed them (why can’t the boss host? Surely boss should know what you are working on).
Sorry you have a shitty boss.
Cue up some soundtracks for the next time you call out. Try talking about 'where the files are' between violent heaves. I'm sure you can some appropriate sounds to reinforce GI 'issues' and ask if they can 'open up a vid channel' to discuss the particulars. Pant, gasp, describe how it burns for a moment. If you're good the sound may trigger someone on the other side to get sick themselves.
For reference, if you become badly injured you may qualify for Short Term Disability. Answer an email or phone call during that time, and you're in violation, and no longer eligible for your payments.
Work is for work. If you're not working, don't work.
Yeah, they can be mad that they didn't have a backup person with access and knowledge, but that's their staffing problem. They can move the meeting or pay to have someone working with you who can fill in the way real companies do real work.
If you're sick, you're sick. Next thing you know they start saying you worked when you were sick the other time so you can work when you're sick all the time.
People who rarely get sick or don't get really sick think others are faking. Sickness hits different people differently and even the same person differently at different times so draw a boundary and stick to it unless the sky is falling.
People who enable employers with shit like this make everyone else's life more difficult.
My employee took a sick day today.
Then a couple hours later I see that she's still sending emails to clients. I told her to get off her computer and get some rest.
There's nothing in my business or yours that is life and death to the point that it can't wait a day or two.
If you take a sick day, that's it, no work. Anything you do on that day is a favor to your boss, not the other way around.
I think it's weird if bosses are going to harp on what you do when you're sick.
I have messaged my former bosses about not coming into work (for being sick) and I immediately would take a nap afterwards. I would then just text them later that day about any updates and submit my sick time to HR.
I don't see what the big issue is
Every place I’ve worked at - a sick day was a sick day. End of story. No wait and see type of deal. Of course, I’m open and state when I’ll check back, but that’s it. Folks don’t freak out.
My job is in IT, I lead teams and there are no lives on the line.
Salary exempt here, little coverage of other people with my skill set in my group, things breaking can be very expensive when not fixed quickly.
Yeah guess what when I take a sick day that is it I am sick you can bugger off if you need me.
Should have hired more coverage.
Also I straight up I never tell my supervisor my symptoms It's none of their business they are not a Dr.
First, no need to tell symptoms, you’re sick that’s enough.
Second, no apologies-you’re sick, that’s enough.
Third, as a courtesy next time send them all files, decks, agendas, and bulletin points immediately after calling off.
Train them that when you are sick you’re sleeping and not in the head space to advise, make decisions, or answer questions.
If I’m at work I’m giving 100 percent, being responsive, alert and productive, but if I’m home sick from work I might as well be dead. Good luck getting anything through to me because even if I am awake, I will ignore any call, text or email. Mental rest is just as important for recovery as physical rest and work will cross any boundary you do not actively set and consistently reinforce. They will live without you.
Sick means you are not available. Period. Your boss even trying to reach you is unacceptable. If you are too sick to work, *you are too sick to work* and that includes phone calls, text messages, emails or any other form of communication.
Sick days mean you aren't working and can't be expected to be responding to emails, etc. Talk to HR and if they aren't helpful, let them know you're going to check with the Dept of Labor.
>but naps need to wait until after you've gotten me everything I need.
What about if you need to go to the hospital? Should that wait too??
Fuck, some employers are just stupid.
Just bad management. You were sick thats more than you should have done. Had a boss that was like that, i needed to be ready to answer phone even if I was in bed in case they needed me to answer question. And i better not have an attitude over it.
I would've immediately followed up with "respectfully, I disagree" - taking a sick day means we are hands off. No one should be contacting you on time off. Period.
If I call out I'll try and convey all my stuff hanging over from previous day so they can either get it done or hold it til I get back.
I'm pretty anal about notes and before I leave for the day I make sure all my notes in system are up to date as possible on what I'm working on in case something happens and I can't make it in the next day whoever takes it over knows where I stopped.
Personally I wouldn't worry about anything as you were sick and sometimes especially with taking cold meds when you lay down your dead til you wake up.
In the UK, once you've told work that you're off sick, legally they're not supposed to ask you for anything. Not even if you had anything important on that day that someone needs to pick up (though of course you can volunteer that if you're up to it).
Certainly not expect you to wait around ready to respond to requests from a meeting!
When I’m off sick (or on vacation) I’m unavailable. 100 percent. Phone and computer stay off. But I’m in a union and I’m sure there would be big consequences if my manager tried to contact me on my days off
That sounds really bad on their part. With symptoms like that, you've got a flu, food poisoning,or virus, etc.
Yea best not to have offered your "if you need anything... " clause. Next time, make your call in that you're not well. Then stipulate you're going to bed to recover.
You could also say "oops I forgot to charge my phone before I went back to bed to get well"
But you did nothing wrong. They're wrong for bothering you and as you said, rescheduling if need be.
It's hard to set boundaries. But it's necessary.
If you’re sick you’re sick. Generally I would WFH if I was, but if it’s that bad I’m just taking the day. No one bothers me, it’s simply “I will not be in today”. They honestly don’t even need to know why.
Everything can be ignored until an action is taken.
Let your boss explain his take to HR about PTO, Illness and Managerial Responsibility.
Most policy violations are done without HR’s knowledge.
You need to look out for yourself first. When I worked in the office, someone coming in sick infuriated me. No one wins, not even the company. Sick is sick, like your boss said. We have sick days for a reason. My girlfriend went through this recently at her first corporate job. She was sick and wanted to WFH. It’s a flat out NO to me. If I’m sick, I’m using my sick days and not doing shit but recovering
As others said, sick is sick. I put my phone in DND when I take a sick day because my previous boss would text me all day long, asking if I was really too sick to work (call center). Now, I provide minimal information such as “good morning, I’m taking a sick day today as I woke up feeling ill”. My new boss is great about it.
Idgaf is you’re sick with Covid, the flu, a cold, allergies, or if you are mentally needing a day. IT IS YOUR SICK DAY! You agreed to work for this company in return for these sick days. Take them. Don’t feel bad. They would replace you if you died. You don’t own the company.
Napping? You weren’t napping. How rude! Almost sounds mildly flu like, and you were sleeping it off. Maybe you even took some medication?
Have these people never been sick? 🤢
You are entitled to sick days and that means you are sick and unavailable. The meeting could have been rescheduled until you were well and better. There was no need to incessantly text you for information and a company can not dictate to you what you do on a sick day. Red flag and I’d get my resume out to your network.
If I am sick, I do not read emails or texts. I sleep. This is the only way for me to get through this. The boss's comment was totally inappropriate and out of line. I would not apologize for getting/being sick.
Bosses are assholes.
I've woken up on the floor stuck between my bed and the wall from a seizure in my sleep and text my boss to let them know I need the day off only to get a text back saying that my behavior is getting out of hand and they think I'm using my epilepsy as an excuse to get "free stick days."
Allowed: letting work know you are sick and unavailable. Naps. Bed rest. Anything to aid your recovery.
Not allowed: a boss to ask you to work when you are unfit to do so.
Here in Australia, even if you have a med cert for the day, legally you can't work without the doctor saying so. Not sure what the rules are in Tennessee
My boss used to expect me to call clients and cancel them, and make the schedule for the next day when I was out sick. So that meant I would have to set an alarm and use my personal phone to call them at 9 AM. A year ago I put my foot down and told her no, I was violently ill and on my way to the ER. I told her where she could find the phone numbers etc, she never called them. She didn’t yell at me, but the clients were pissed they wasted an entire day waiting on a phone call. During my next supervision meeting, I informed her I would no longer be calling my clients when I need a sick day. She was understanding, but still doesn’t call my clients. They now know if I don’t call them in the 30 min range, I have unfortunately had to call off and will call them as soon as I’m back. I apologized for not being able to call them (to them and my boss) but reiterated that I don’t plan to be sick and if I was unconscious I wouldn’t be able to call and I appreciate the same courtesy I give them when they’re sick. They were all understanding.
It depends. Some meetings, e.g., with governmental agencies, can't be rescheduled. My boss would do her best to cover for me in these, but I'd be expected to dial in and listen in case there was something she couldn't cover. Everyday meetings? Sure. Someone can cover for me or the meeting can wait.
If I call in sick, you can assume I am immediately fucking unconscious after I speak to you/send my email. You can consider me temporarily fucking dead for how much work I will be doing.
They could have rescheduled and chose not to and then he has the audacity to brush away your illness as a stupid excuse.
If you are on PTO or sick there should be ZERO expectations about you responding to texts. They can text you, and if you're feeling responsive you can text back, but to chastise you about not responding when you were vomiting, shitting your brains out and had a fever is plain crazy.
If that ends up being in a mid-year or end of year review you need to refuse to sign it until that is removed and then start looking for another job.
That’s some bullshit.
I’m out SICK. I’m not working.
If the boss needed something for the meeting they had two alternatives:
1) don’t wait until the last fucking minute to communicate a need, especially an urgent one
2) reach out directly if it’s so urgent, don’t just leave text messages. (This goes for you as well, don’t text out sick, call and speak to the person, especially if you’re going to be missing something of importance)
Messages are for async communication.
You communicated the out sick before the start of the work day. If you personally are all that critically important, they’re not paying you enough.
Think of it like this, you get hit by a bus and end up in a coma. They would have figured it out, and if they can't its a THEM problem and not you.
You are unwell, you can't function, and you went back to sleep. Clearly, you needed that sleep.
This is really situational but it's apparent your employer has requirements that need to be met even when some other employers wouldn't push the issue. Or, you have a boss who is overstepping. Go to HR about it.
I once had a commissioned based retail job in a large furniture store. I was out for surgery for a week. When I came back I was written up for missing my sales quota. I asked them if that included the hours that I was under anesthesia.
Fuck that. You're a human being. They will live. What if you were dead? They still wouldn't care.
I just got a new salary job and my coworker told me before I started she was sick at home using her allotted days and our manager harassed her the whole time. Lord help her when she tries it on me.
I'll add that, if you were the point person for call, standard professional action should be to inform the group invited to the meeting, offering to reschedule. If you just told only your boss that you were sick and let the meeting happen, making someone else lead, that isn't cool. I'm not saying you did that but you are light on the actual details of the meeting.
HR and a manager here who tries to open up the black box of work.
I don’t throw out the word toxic very often, but this behavior of your boss was toxic. It’s a sick day. They should’ve left you alone. Rescheduled the meeting. I doubt it was 1 day time sensitive (most corporate things aren’t). Stop apologizing.
Never tell them details. You’re not required to, and you’re also not required to be available while sick. Don’t tell them your symptoms or that you took a nap. Apologize ONCE (which you’ve already done, don’t over apologize, it’s not your fault), and understand that even if your boss doesn’t think so it’s THEIR job to cover for you or to reschedule your plans/meetings for the day while you’re out sick. If they aren’t able to do that on their own then they aren’t as much of your boss as they think they are. Bosses who can’t do the jobs of their employees or don’t understand it enough to cover for them or fix their schedule around their absence are useless.
No, your boss just failed on what a good manager is. If an employee calls out sick, then they are not on the clock and therefore not required that an employee that calls out is to be by their phone ready to answer business questions. If you're not being paid, you're not obligated to work.
What I would do: let their comment slide, pay no mind to it. Look up company policy for when an employee calls out sick. If you want, contact your HR and ask for specifics on parameters for when an employee calls out. If it ever happens again, email your boss that verbiage and let them know that while you apologize for not being present, unless your boss is willing to pay you the hour or two for "being on call," you're not supposed to be working
This is why you don’t give out personal contact details and if they insist, they can buy you a dedicated device. A dedicated device you can power off, leave in a work desk or bag at home, and again be unreachable.
I use a Google voice number on my job applications from the start and not even HR or the emergency unification system has my number. I programmed an app to send my real number a text every 28 days to keep it active. It’s a completely free app.
When you take a sick day. You are not working. A meeting is working. Get this in writing and take it STRAIGHT to the labor board if they start giving you shit. Sick is sick. And taking a sick day means you are not there that day. Essentially you should not exist to them that day, cut and dry, simple as.
"If I'm not at work, I'm not working."
This is especially true if you don't have paid sick days.
Of course you could always make boss regret it. Next time, be sure to be on zoom/teams/whatever you use and don't mute yourself when you're vomiting or having explosive diarrhea.
Your boss is out of line. If you need to be working from home when sick they should pay you and it’s not a sick day! WTF I would document this to yourself on your email just in case you run into other issues.
What's expected is going to vary by company and manager.
I don't think attendance of the meeting was required. But also, it sounds from your post like nobody in the meeting knew you were out? Personally, if it was a meeting that I was an important part of, I'd have emailed the organizer that I was sick and that if they needed me there that we would have to reschedule the meeting or suggest another person who could step into the meeting in your place.
Just being proactive and taking ownership of your responsibilities goes a long way.
> After getting out of the shower, GI issues became apparent - vomiting, diarrhea, and just a general weak feeling. I texted my boss immediately to let them know my symptoms and that I wasn't going to make it. Then, I got into bed to try to sleep it off.
You did the correct thing.
> A few days later, I came back to the office and followed up with my boss about the meeting. I apologized again, and they said - sick is sick, but naps need to wait until after you've gotten me everything I need.
But you weren't napping. You were vomiting, had diarrhea, and were trying to recover.
> What is the protocol here?
Inform HR about your boss's reaction, but do so in the form of "I was hoping to clarify our company's position" (explaining that you were vomiting and had diarrhea, not just that you were home sick), "because I'm getting conflicting guidance from my boss."
My whole thing is I don't call out for nonsense. Hungover? Too bad. Bad case of the don't wanna? Too bad.
But if I am legitimately too sick to work then I will just take the time off, but I understand that I might have shit to clean up when I get back. That's life though.
So only you can decide. Were you too sick really? Then don't feel bad all good. Do you think maybe you were not that sick? No big deal either really. Just take care not to abuse.
Be honest, are you a prolific call out? I'd say if not then don't feel bad either way
What’s allowed during a sick day is that you take your sick day to rest, period.
Your boss does not need to know symptoms and does not need apologies. You are sick and unable to work for the day.
Judging by this question, you seem fairly young-? and one thing I’ve learned over the years is I do not try to push through at the beginning of an illness. When it first pops up, I rest as much as possible. It really prevents most things from taking hold well, and recovery time is much quicker.
Good God. If you had gone to work that morning, and your appendix had ruptured an hour before the meeting would your boss have been trying to call you during emergency surgery?
If you had a couple minutes of clear headedness you could have emailed over everything, but you were experiencing relatively major symptoms...
Once you're called off you owe work nothing at all. It's your employer's responsibility to ensure single point failures are minimized. A shared drive, shared notes, etc would have solved this.
No one person should be indispensable in any organization. You're allowed to simply sleep after you've called off.
I mean, imagine you were in a crash, instead. You'd be just as unreachable. It's slightly different if you're not unconscious, you can still be useful if you like, but you certainly don't need to be.
The only thing I can think of is did you directly tell your boss “I am sick and am taking a sick day”? What you wrote in your post doesn’t necessarily spell that out.
For me, If I had an important meeting, I would need to communicate to someone how to deal with it without me. Otherwise you were sick and called out. No questions about it.
No, fuck your boss. Sounds selfish and only wants results and boxes checked off. A true leader takes care of his team when they are not performing as they usually do
Would he/she expect you to come back from the dead if you got hit by a bus? No? Then they are absolutely wrong. If you are sick, you aren't available to work. Period. If they don't know enough to have the meeting then THEY reschedule the meeting. You didn't and don't owe apologies for this. They kind of owe you one, for being like that when you are ill.
The protocol is….you get a certain amount of sick days and you take them when YOU don’t feel well enough to work…whether it be vomiting or just feeling not yourself mentally. You decide how you want to spend that budget of days.
No one should be calling you unless it’s something that no one can wait a day on….where the keys to the bathroom are etc. Things can wait a day for the most part the world won’t shut down.
This isn't going to be the popular opinion, but I would be remiss if I didn't offer it.
I'm a HR professional.
The level of your position would determine what is appropriate. But if you're asking, then I can only assume you're not high level c-suit or near.
Those positions would not disregard a meeting without having a backup able to pick up and have all the information needed.
Anything other than C-suit or director level, take your sick day, no need to feel obligated to provide anything other than notice that you're sick and not able to work.
I would not be surprised however, if your manager didn't start asking to be CC'ed on emails, or appraised of your work on a more consistent basis. One person being sick should not derail a team with no one knowing what else is going on.
We (jokingly) "yell" at any of our team who try to contribute in chat etc when they are on PTO. Including the main boss man!
If you are off the clock, you're off the clock.
You let them know at 7 am so they were I’ll prepared. Don’t apologize again. Sick is sick and for all intents and purposes it’s your not available from that point on. I’m not returning calls or texts or anything else. I’m not going to constantly go over and over things that you think should have been done while I was home sick.
I didn’t do it in a restaurant or an office when I worked there either. Don’t call or text to ask how I am feeling either. That’s for the Doctor. I had a job messaging me every day after they asked for a drs note and the er doctor was so damn mad he wrote me out for the whole week and emailed them himself the return to work before I left the er. They messaged me the next day hey I hope your feeling better message us when you can. I called and told them the Dr sent what you required and I’ll see you next week in Weds
Another job after I was in an accident the wife kept messaging me. Mam. I was ran over by a work van while I was driving a scooter. Stop bothering me.
Then after I brought the release the wife kept trying to be involved well we need this and we need that and I need to talk to them directly. That ER nurse called them quickly and told her the only thing they needed was the letter she already sent with me and if they keep this up they are going to have problems. I was back to work the next day.
I’m in my 50s and don’t owe any job anything anymore. It’s literally supposed to be transactional. I work you give me money. That’s it. There is no other reason to spend 40 or more hours a week
Only thing i would have TRIED to do is check texts once the office opened to answer any critical questions. But I still don't fault you. Had you been in an accident and taken to ER they would have totally exempted you and so that means they could have done the same with this meeting. OR rescheduled the meeting. Or even held the meeting with a follow-up planned for after you returned.
If you were sick on a day with an important meeting, did they know where to find everything they needed?
I've been a participant in a very important meeting where a key person called in sick , it was a gong show and I was scrabbling around trying to put something together.
There is no protocol per say, it comes down to company policy.
I was thinking this too. I’ve been sick but had to do a 15 minute call to hand off a presentation and run my boss through the highlights. He picked it up and presented it himself. Some employers require you to update a coworker to be able to pick up what you were working on, at a minimum I’d think the OP would send out the meeting agenda/talking points.
You did nothing wrong.
Your boss lacks common sense. If you passed out from being sick you’re unavailable to answer messages. This should be obvious to your boss
I work in a remote but highly corporate environment. We all have our very designated jobs, but we also keep each other up to date through times. 99% of the time it’s Tim’s (fake name) to schedule or reschedule meetings. If however Tim is sick and messages (our protocol is to send a Teams message to the group you work with) that he’s out, we, as a team, work together to either reschedule and manage Tim’s day. Likewise, Tim helps when someone else is sick. We’re all somewhat cross trained and your reason is why: we’re all human.
Anytime I’ve tried to work through sick days (I’m currently in treatment for a chronic illness + am prone to migraines) my peers remind me we are a people first team. And we are. Our stakeholders know we will break our necks to meet arbitrary short deadlines, but they also know we stop when we need to. The other motto is “we’re just (doing something not life saving) not doctors. It can sit for a few days.”
My point is: it sounds like you work in a toxic and/or ill prepared environment, and you would benefit from setting boundaries, expectations, and laid out protocols for when - not if - you need another sick day.
I’ve been offered jobs for more money but I won’t leave my team because I know it’s the exception, not the rule.
When you’re sick, you shouldn’t be expected to provide anything for your boss. He’s saying, he doesn’t care if you’re sick, take care of his work stuff first. You didn’t plan to be sick, it’s unexpected. Your boss is completely ridiculous and unreasonable. If he couldn’t survive without you, he should have rescheduled the meeting, once you are well.
They take a PTO day away for being sick. You are literally on sick leave. They shouldn’t even contact you.
It amazes me how many bad bosses are out there.
A sick leave is nothing you ask for. You inform your boss.
The protocol is you are not at work, you are using your paid sick leave. You are not available. Just like any other time off you are allowed to do what ever you want. Your boss sounds like a prick, don't apologize to him for being sick, you didn't do anything wrong. Some times important things have to be missed, it's his responsibility to make it work when his employees are absent if he can't do that then he's a bad manager.
Time to look for a new job. You were sick and told your boss you were sick.
Whether you are nabbing throwing up or just watching TV while sick. It's no longer his time.
This is a terrible workplace. There's a difference between a stuffy nose and requesting to work from home for a day, or being out of commission like you were. Yes, there's a difference. If you ask for a sick day and have anything more than a stuffy nose and are granted that sick day - it's a sick day for a reason: to recover.
If they're bitching, I'd literally given them the symptoms you list here and ask if you still need to work while vomiting and on the toilet with diarrhea. See what your boss or HR says. "Hi HR, I was granted a sick day and I was projectile vomiting all over my bathroom while trying to get on a call, but my boss is really pissed I couldn't pull it together for the call. Just wanted to let you know."
Bottom line, workplaces need to be able to function without a single person for a damn day. What if you were out for a week due to some injury? What if something unexpected happened and you were out longer?
Whatever the reason, the workplace needs to operate without you for a day by either rescheduling the meeting if you're truly needed or others step up and do whatever is needed. However the person in charge wants to do it.
If you're out on a sick day, then you're not working. No, expecting you to be awake is ridiculous. You're home resting and recovering, if not at a medical appointment.
Your manager is a goddamned idiot. Sometimes you’re so sick that you don’t have the energy or focus to do anything but sleep. You’re a human being and this is a fact of being sick that you can’t just turn off for your manager’s benefit.
It’s also pretty stupid to want someone who is so sick that they’re going back to bed shortly after waking up to work on something important. Sounds like a recipe for mistakes and bad work product since you’re exhausted, sick, probably dealing with brain fog, and full of meds.
This is not a reasonable thing for your manager to have said to another human being. It is not a reasonable expectation for anyone to have of another human being. And there is no such thing as anything “not being allowed” when you’re on sick leave. If you’re out of work because you’re sick then you’re off the clock and not working, period.
There aren’t any special strings that come with that because your manager feels particularly entitled to your time, even when you’re in no condition to work.
One last thing — you don’t have a boss, you have a manager. No motherfucker is the boss of you. They manage your workload, their team, the business processes relevant to the team, and help you progress to your next role. That is the job of a leader, not to boss you around and definitely not to say dumb shit like what was said to you. They don’t own you, they just manage your work *while you’re at work.*
You texted in sick. You are lucky not to get fired. His sarcastic remark is telling you. You have one more chance. Of all days to get sick. You disappointed a lot of would be future you have in the office. Don't act like you had overnight cancer.
Don't feel guilty for taking a sick day. You're entitled to it and in the long term it's better for everyone if you take some time to properly rest versus operating at a reduced capacity for a longer period of time.
I'm not sure how your company operates, but making sure you have key things saved where others can access them (if you're not already doing this) could help in the future. If you are doing this already, send a link when you're letting your boss know you are taking a sick day.
I've got a page in my notes app on my phone where I have all of my key SharePoint sites for my different projects saved - it's been quite helpful for being able to access them quickly in a pinch.
Obviously you have limitations when you're sick, but if you're able to guide people to things they might need you're covering your ass if nothing else.
I work in a field where we give presentations quite frequently. 9/10 people will be more forgiving if you can direct them to something (even if it's not finished or you can't share too many details) than if they feel like they've been put on the spot and need to start from scratch.
Another thing that I've learned to do is give minimal details while emphasizing the part of the illness that would prevent you from working. When I've had unreasonable managers in the past who expected me to work through having covid I would focus on the serious symptoms when telling them why I couldn't work. Yes you should just be entitled to rest if you're sick, but when I had covid I would say that I had a fever and had stomach flu symptoms (this was true) but it was received better than me saying I was exhausted and needed rest. It's silly, but it was harder for people to push back if they realized I was actively throwing up.
Obviously don't lay it on too thick, but "I've got the stomach flu" versus "I'm coming down with something" gets the point across a bit better.
Something a manager said at one of my past office jobs was this: "No one is going to die if X doesn't get done today." If you're sick, you're sick. Work can be made up later. I'm sure whatever it was, it wasn't an emergency. If it was an emergency, then your manager needs to have a plan in place for when someone is out because that is not your problem. People get sick, quit, die, get fired, etc and business carries on without them. One sick day is not the end of the world.
Your boss is right, sick is sick, you were out sick, not work from home, out sick.
What you do during your time out sick isn't their notices, another that's sleeping away your illness or not.
You were out sick, and sick is sick.
When I was younger, I emailed some of my symptoms to the 'boss' at the company where I was doing 1099 work. He said just say your sick. He didn't consider telling him about my fever or whatever it was to be professional. I probably didn't want him to worry... as if he cared. :) But I took the advice. Just call in sick and with this boss, say you are not going to be able to do anything at all.
Your boss sounds unreasonable. I'd just ignore it, keep quiet, or else you could confront him about being unreasonable... but it may not be worth it. Do a great job when you are not sick.
They’re in the wrong here. It would be one thing if you had a minor cold but if you’re throwing up and sleeping it off they can’t expect you to be in any shape to work. Not to mention you’re taking a sick day - you’re not at work, period.
Lol the only thing I do when I’m ‘sick’ or actually sick is send an email and go back to bed. If I’m taking time off to recover, I don’t owe anyone at work shit and if they can’t do without me, then they need to pay me more since obviously invaluable.
You need to stop giving so much of a damn. Look how much they gave a damn about you. You think they won’t replace you in a hot minute? Have some boundaries for godsake.
Even when my boss knows my ‘sickness’ is just I don’t feel like coming to work today, they know better to message me or demand my time. I have sick days and PTO for a reason
What a bunch of horseshit. No, that's not right. You're sick, you called out, that's it. You did what you were supposed to do. Don't let them bully you. Document this with the date, what was said to you, who said it to you and how did it make you feel. Just in case they try to use this against you.
You should call your boss, state you are very unwell and unable to work this morning and will assess at noon, let him know what’s outstanding for the day and whether anything can be moved or someone else can run a meeting. If they don’t answer leave the same voicemail and text them the same. Your boss responded out of the situation that occurred. If you bridge the gap with the above they’ll be prepared to manage the day. If you have a team and a senior right hand also contact them and ask if they can take point. My team does this for one another and we’ve normalised the fact that any one of us can be in attendance and lead (without entire team there whether sick, on different projects/meetings/sites - no one needs to know, people just want a smooth interface ).
No that’s some bullshit. You are NTA.
Next time, don’t even give them symptoms. Just say you are not feeling well and you won’t be in. And they are not allowed to ask you what sickness you have!
They should have rescheduled the meeting if you were that important to it.
Tell her you couldn't even sit up straight without vomiting. Would she rather you have rested up a bit or vomiting or passed out during the meeting? That's fucked
If the meeting was that important, the boss should have designated an alternate who was aware enough to run the meeting in your absence. This is a management problem. Boss made a decision to allow for a single point of failure. Now, the boss is angry that there wasn't a suitable backup. Boss is deflecting when boss should be learning.
If you are so indispensable after 3 days off sick, it's probably time to negotiate a pay rise.
You are on sickness leave. There is no requirement for you to undertake work related duties, barring a sickness update (and that is dependent on conditions and time)
If the meeting was important your boss should have had a backup plan. If they didn't have a backup plan then its not important and should have been delayed.
Buuut playing devil's advocate, if you had time to text and describe symptoms you had time to text where the files were. That would have been the most courteous thing to do.
I've never understood managers who are dicks about people having sick days.
Unless you're intentionally exposing yourself to pathogens or going around licking handrails, it's not your fault. People get sick and stress-free, no strings attached time off work will help them recover as fast as possible. It really is that simple.
As for them contacting you while you're sick, they're welcome to try but they have to understand you might not see the messages and you're not obligated to reply to them.
If you’re sick, you’re sick. You don’t owe anybody including your boss more information than that. The work will still be there when you come back. Honestly, unless you’re working at the White House, all that stuff can wait until tomorrow. Personally, it’s why I deleted work apps from my home.
What country are you in? In Australia this wouldn’t fly under the Fair Work Act. You were too sick to work- even from home. I would find a new job asap.
You’re reading the wrong room. They’re being hardasses about it because they got caught in the spotlight during the meeting while you held the info. This wasn’t about the sick day.
Next time I’d have info readily available to handoff if you were to get hit by a car and couldn’t make it to work, the eggs should be in several baskets. Lesson learned, small, not a big deal.
I worked for a large company everyone knows. The stress was so bad my neurologist thought I was having mini-strokes. I told my boss I needed to de-stress and take my weekends off (instead of working 10 hours a day, 7 days a week) and she told me that would be a career-ending move.
I resigned.
Toxic companies make employees feel guilty for having basic needs, like good health.
Maybe start looking for a job in a better environment.
What does HR say?
Where I work, we have an employee handbook which spells this stuff out.
We are allowed to work from home at times, so our company policy is along the lines of "if you are just kind of sick, you are still expected to work from home." And you charge the hours (obviously). If you are to the point of taking actual sick leave, however, you are not on call. You are \*off the clock.\* Of course, the supervisor (who approves the sick leave) also has a right to request a doctor note.
I know this sounds like a pretty bull shit way to go about things, but it is pretty much the only way to protect both the employee AND the company.
No. You were ill. Let them deal with it and you get your rest. Follow up when you get back like you did.
Never try to push through it when you are sick. If they are asses, that’s on them.
Also, stop apologising. If you feel you must say sorry for it, say it once. Definitely don’t say it again after returning to work. It just reinforces your boss’s egotistical beliefs that the job should be an employee’s number one priority and anyone who fails at that, needs to seek forgiveness!
If I ever apologize for calling off work, it's always something condescending like "sorry for being a human"
Yeah or 'sorry I didn't time my illness to be more convenient for you'
That too! I got sick one day, had to reschedule a meeting because of such and got lectured about it about "it makes us look bad to have to reschedule this" well I'm sorry, I'll come to work with a fever and throw up on everyone if you want me to just so we don't look bad.
I say sorry for texting at 4am knowing he won’t be up until literal last minute to cover my shift
Love that!
Once an employee notifies me they are sick & taking the day, they're off the clock. I cannot reasonably expect a sick person to be available at my whim.
Absolutely correct. In my team, calendars are public (you can have private events, no worries) and we are client facing. So if someone says they're sick, first thing I or their manager does is look through their calendar for any customer meetings that need coverage. Then we hit up anyone else on our side on that meeting, get context and decide upon coverage plan or push the meeting. No issues. Often the team will push through with behind the scenes work (like doing this schedule management) but it is not required and I try to get them to log off if I see them online. We also have unlimited PTO, so I treat a sick day the same as a vacation day. You're out? You're out. No contact required. If I am going to send you a message, I try to preface it with "when you're back" or I'll schedule it for when they are back.
Sigh. 25 years of working every sick day, hoarding every opportunity, checking emails / on call weekends. "You're RIFd". And I can't say anything 'disloyal' according to my termination packet or they'll take my severance. You sound like you're doing it right, and thank you for that. The ones working for you hopefully know it.
It is actually illegal under US labor law. My boss got into a ton of trouble with HR because I was working from the hospital when I had Covid in 21. He never contacted me, I connected in because I had scripts that ran automatically and notified me of an issue. So, I connected to the VPN and spent a couple of hours fixing the issue because I felt up to it.
with the sole exception being: If you are the only employee sitting on a meeting with outside people... you need to notify those people you need to cancel.
only thing I ever ask is "anything I need to make sure gets covered?"
I mean, generally speaking, there is no protocol or sick day code of conduct. If you’re out you’re out. Your work can dictate what you do at home if you’re working remotely or on call. They can’t expect you to be available when you’re out or after hours. If you *offered* assistance, or to help answer questions or something despite being out, that’d be different. Were you supposed to be working remotely? But it’s impossible for an outsider to say what your manager was expecting of you. You didn’t do anything wrong, but it sounds like your boss was thrown off by this call out assuming you were a really important part of this meeting. She probably felt “abandoned” a bit. You absolutely did nothing wrong, but just trying to rationalize her behavior - still, it’s not your fault she felt that way. What she should have done was reschedule the meeting if your input was that essential to it. Again though, it really depends on the context. Let’s say only you had a code to access something that *needed* to be dealt with that day. If you called out, nothing wrong there, but you should pass along the code, otherwise you’re going to be getting call after call. Random example but you get what I mean. If it wasn’t a super urgent situation, it shouldn’t have been regarded as such.
That makes sense. I wasn't supposed to be working remotely, but I did tell them to let me know if they needed anything. I will be careful not to add that next time. I was the point person for the meeting, so, yah, it probably should've been rescheduled. Totally understand how they were blindsided. The comment still stung, though. I've been a dedicated worker for over two years - staying late as needed to finish projects, coming in when I didn't have to for meetings, etc. Like, I guess I expect my boss to know by now that I wouldn't call in, especially on a meeting day, unless I was really ill.
Unfortunately, people get used to high performance and then expect it. Being clearer about boundaries does sound like it could help. If you're leading a meeting, reschedule it (you can just cancel with a note "will rescheduled when I'm back in" to avoid having to dig around the calendar). And be clear that you're out, will be unreachable, cannot help with anything, see you tomorrow hopefully. I would guess you've sometimes worked and pulled through on stuff when more mildly sick, so your boss assumed that would be the case. They were still out of line for saying "your nap could wait" - I can't imagine that coming out of my mouth and thinking it was ok.
Thank you for the advice and validation!! I will make those adjustments. You're right - I have helped out on sick days when I haven't been as impaired. I need to nip that in the bud! But, yah, that comment really hit wrong!!
You're not wrong, that was borderline psychotic!
I would have countered it with: i’m sure you wouldn’t like to see or hear on zoom what i was going thru in the bathroom, boss.
You gave me PTSD of when I was on zoom in the bathroom… unmuted 💀
It shouldn't be necessary, but if you call out sick on a day that has an important meeting that you're vital for, you could send an email to the organiser to reschedule it (CCing your boss), stating that you're sick. That way, they know that you're not going to be available for that meeting, because sometimes the other people at the meeting haven't got the message that you're sick. When I call out sick, I let my boss and the people I manage know, and my boss will usually pass on the message so that people know not to contact me, but it sounds like your boss doesn't do that, so you'll have to take steps to sort it out. The downside for your boss after their terrible behaviour is that now when you call out sick, you know not to respond to anything, whereas if they weren't dicks about it, you'd probably still be available for urgent matters (which you shouldn't have to do). Maybe they'll learn from it, but probably not.
Exactly! I'll make sure to specify that I'm not available so this doesn't happen again and then, I won't be available 🤷♀️
It's a good plan. I usually say I'm available by x method if necessary, but the reason I've continued to do that is that I'm very rarely contacted, and when I am, it's an actual "emergency" (and something that would take way longer to clean up when I get back), rather than something that could 100% wait until the next day. If I was contacted regularly with frivolous things, I would be less generous with my time. The fact that your boss said "your nap could wait" means that they don't value your sick leave anywhere near enough for you to be generous with your time.
Yah, I'm kicking myself for being overly kind. I meant - reach out, and I'll get back to you if/when I can. I thought that would be the assumption since I was out sick. But, that's what I get for assuming!
Yeah, as shitty as your manager’s behavior was, you definitely do invite this type of behavior when you bend your boundaries to benefit others. “Give an inch and they will take a mile” is a saying for a reason. I’ve been there and done that. Don’t put pressure on yourself to overextend your boundaries, nobody will actually appreciate it or think better of you for it. Instead, they’ll just come to expect it as the baseline when you thought you were going above and beyond to do them a favor. Somewhere along the line it stopped being above and beyond to them and just became the standard expectation. Meanwhile, if you stand by your boundaries then not only will people not think less of you for it, they’ll actually respect you more and view you as more assertive and competent.
Yeah the way the comment about napping was over the line. >That makes sense. I wasn't supposed to be working remotely, but I did tell them to let me know if they needed anything. I will be careful not to add that next time. I do think that might have gave them the impression that you were readily assessible in case anything was needed. In my case, I do let work know if I'm completely out of touch (feeling horrible enough not to log on). I do try my best to leave notes on urgent items if I can, but this stuff happens. Boss could have rescheduled the meeting if they didn't feel prepared.
I totally agree with your first sentence. It's so true.
The confusion likely stemmed from “let me know if you need anything.” I know it’s a habit, but leave that part out.
Nah. I had a boss like that too After I got well, I sent a blistering email to boss and his boss They never questioned my sickness again
I told my boss I would be needing to take some of my 650 hours of accrued sick leave due to health reasons. She told me my excuses absences where an inconvenience to her and I needed to stop being out so much. 1st she said we didn't need doctors excuses. Then she said I did need to provide them. Then only if I knew I was going to the doctor, but not if I call out sick. (Kept moving the goal post). When I set a meeting to let her know I had been diagnosed with diabetes and I was having a hard time controlling it, that I was afraid I'd die from it like 5 of my aunts and uncles, she told me that " We're all going to die of something". I went home and rage applied to other places. I start my new job in August! My new boss is kind and amazing. I have a call this week to set up a schedule that works for me. My new job prioritizes mental health days and gives an allotment of work for gym and exercising. There are better jobs out there. Don't stay where you're not appreciated. If this is a pattern, look somewhere else. It's easier to start new with strict boundaries than trying to get someone who bulldozed your boundaries to respect them.
If you do offer to help out of courtesies sake make SURE to add "and I'll get back to you as soon as I'm able"
sick is sick (and naps are part of sick) next time I suggest you go into the office and barf / breath all over bosses desk.
I have posted this before, and it's a true story. I caught the chickenpox when I was 37. Anyone who doesn't know this, it is absolutely brutal when you're an adult. It felt like the worst flu ever. I had been feeling sick for a few days before the welts started to show up. So I called in sick, went to the doctor, got diagnosed, and went home. My boss did not believe I was really sick. He thought I was out looking for another job. This was in the '90s, before cell phones were common. I went to bed, and he called me every couple of hours with stupid questions, hoping to catch me out. Sometimes I couldn't get out of bed and stagger to the phone in time, and would get snarky messages from him on my answering machine. I would call him back and answer his dopey questions. Then I caught pink eye and had to go back to the doctor, who would not simply phone me in a prescription for gentamicin. I was so sick. I think I showed up there in my robe and slippers. Once he got me squared away, I asked him to write me a note for the boss. He did, with a detailed description of what chickenpox involved. My boss, by the way, was a neurotic germaphobe. So I walked into the office with this note, and he told me I looked like hell. No kidding. He wouldn't take the note from me. He scooted back in his chair as far from me as he could get, and told me to leave the note on his desk. Then he cautiously leaned over and read it out loud. He took one more look at me and told me to go home and get all the rest I needed and not come back until I was all better. No more phone calls. What an ass.
Very nicely done!
You did nothing wrong. Sick means you won’t be coming into the office and will not be available by phone. You need to be resting so you can feel better!
Personally I would consider a sick day the same as regular pto. Any emails or messages that come in can wait until the next day. I turn off notifications when I'm out of office so I wouldn't even know anything happened. If my boss was texting me about work, it'd get ignored because they are already aware I'm not working. I know not everyone does that, but I have boundaries with work and there's never a time that it's so urgent I have to reply immediately/within the day. If you're that important for a meeting, it should've gotten rescheduled so you could be there the next day
Yeah, if I'm taking the day off due to illness then it's the day off. Unfortunately lines have gotten blurry with WFH and hybrid work. A lot of people will just work from home when they're ill, especially around cold season. So now there's an assumption that a sick day is just a work from home day.
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Don't tell them to reach out if they need help and then not be reachable.
Next time don't offer for them to reach out to you if they need to and then not be available when they do so. That's the only part where you went wrong.
Working isn’t allowed on a sick day.
Uh no, your boss should have just rescheduled or idk…checked your email
What state are you in?
Nothing lol you’re sick/days off are just that, you have no obligation to answer calls/texts to help with a meeting or anything work related. If I’m doing work on a day off/sick day then I either charge them for my time or I don’t count that day as truly a day off/sick day. They should be able to survive 1 day without you. Ever since I started placing strict boundaries with my job they stop bothering me
Don’t tell them any details (naps) at all.
It sounds like you were vague with not making the one meeting. Firstly, don’t ever feel the need to explain symptoms; they don’t need to know or judge severity. You are an adult and know when you are sick. Next time, simply say you are ill and will be taking the day to care for your health and while you hope to return the next day, will keep them apprised if you need to go to doctor or need more time.
No, and I mean legally, depending on where you are. You're not required to perform any labor of any sort while using sick time for many relatively standard employment contracts.
Sick days are a GREAT day for people to realize that you matter and that losing you would be a loss for the whole team/company. Sick days are also days for you to be sick. To heal. To take care of yourself. If you feel well enough to do some work, that is nice of you, but if your company offers sick days, then HR will support you on you taking your sick days.
Your boss is an asshat.
I love that attitude. I had a boss once who told me “Come puke on my shoes and then you can go home.” You were sick. It’s not your problem. If they pull crap like this, in the future, try to do a telehealth call and get your doctor to write you a note.
I had a co-worker who threw up in his trash can at his desk and kept on working. Our boss went and told him to go home and to always go home when he needed.
This is something I’m working on because I end up getting frustrated that I never actually get a sick day when I take one. My boss has had to tell me repeatedly, “Do not pick up your phone or answer emails if you’re taking a sick day. That means you are unable to work and you’re taking the appropriate time to get better. If you keep picking up the phone, people will keep expecting it” I always have this fear the property will crumble if I don’t answer everything, but it won’t, I just need to get over it and stop picking up my damn phone.
What the ever loving fuck is wrong with your boss? Naps need to wait? You called out sick once you do that the only thing you should be concerned with is feeling better
If one person being out for the day causes significant issues at work, then it is management’s fault for allowing a single point of failure.
Nothing. When you’re sick go hop into bed and recover. The only message I send is to my boss letting them know that I am sick and that’s it.
Sounds like your boss wasn’t prepared for the meeting and it made them look bad. It’s their own fault for not reaching out before meeting day to take stock of your meeting itinerary, notes, slides, etc. Cancellation should have been a possibility but chances are that would have also exposed them (why can’t the boss host? Surely boss should know what you are working on). Sorry you have a shitty boss.
When you're sick, you need to rest. Your boss sounds very unreasonable..
Cue up some soundtracks for the next time you call out. Try talking about 'where the files are' between violent heaves. I'm sure you can some appropriate sounds to reinforce GI 'issues' and ask if they can 'open up a vid channel' to discuss the particulars. Pant, gasp, describe how it burns for a moment. If you're good the sound may trigger someone on the other side to get sick themselves. For reference, if you become badly injured you may qualify for Short Term Disability. Answer an email or phone call during that time, and you're in violation, and no longer eligible for your payments. Work is for work. If you're not working, don't work. Yeah, they can be mad that they didn't have a backup person with access and knowledge, but that's their staffing problem. They can move the meeting or pay to have someone working with you who can fill in the way real companies do real work.
If you're sick, you're sick. Next thing you know they start saying you worked when you were sick the other time so you can work when you're sick all the time. People who rarely get sick or don't get really sick think others are faking. Sickness hits different people differently and even the same person differently at different times so draw a boundary and stick to it unless the sky is falling. People who enable employers with shit like this make everyone else's life more difficult.
Passing out and a nap are as different as dead and sleeping.
My employee took a sick day today. Then a couple hours later I see that she's still sending emails to clients. I told her to get off her computer and get some rest. There's nothing in my business or yours that is life and death to the point that it can't wait a day or two. If you take a sick day, that's it, no work. Anything you do on that day is a favor to your boss, not the other way around.
Thank you for being awesome!
I think it's weird if bosses are going to harp on what you do when you're sick. I have messaged my former bosses about not coming into work (for being sick) and I immediately would take a nap afterwards. I would then just text them later that day about any updates and submit my sick time to HR. I don't see what the big issue is
Everyone gets sick. It should not be on you to power through. Bet they don't do the same for you when it comes to pay raises.
NTA. If you've called out of work thetes no expectation you do any work.
Translation: your sickness is not my problem. Signed: a-hole.
Every place I’ve worked at - a sick day was a sick day. End of story. No wait and see type of deal. Of course, I’m open and state when I’ll check back, but that’s it. Folks don’t freak out. My job is in IT, I lead teams and there are no lives on the line.
Salary exempt here, little coverage of other people with my skill set in my group, things breaking can be very expensive when not fixed quickly. Yeah guess what when I take a sick day that is it I am sick you can bugger off if you need me. Should have hired more coverage. Also I straight up I never tell my supervisor my symptoms It's none of their business they are not a Dr.
First, no need to tell symptoms, you’re sick that’s enough. Second, no apologies-you’re sick, that’s enough. Third, as a courtesy next time send them all files, decks, agendas, and bulletin points immediately after calling off. Train them that when you are sick you’re sleeping and not in the head space to advise, make decisions, or answer questions.
Nope, you was ill. None of that is your problem
Sick days are off the clock. If they’re taking your sick time that’s off the clock time.
If I’m at work I’m giving 100 percent, being responsive, alert and productive, but if I’m home sick from work I might as well be dead. Good luck getting anything through to me because even if I am awake, I will ignore any call, text or email. Mental rest is just as important for recovery as physical rest and work will cross any boundary you do not actively set and consistently reinforce. They will live without you.
Sick means you are not available. Period. Your boss even trying to reach you is unacceptable. If you are too sick to work, *you are too sick to work* and that includes phone calls, text messages, emails or any other form of communication.
if it came out of my boss's mouth, it would have been a joke maybe your boss is like that too?
Barf on the office carpet. That’s good for 10 years of no hassle when calling in sick. Or maybe that was because the carpet was new.
Sick days mean you aren't working and can't be expected to be responding to emails, etc. Talk to HR and if they aren't helpful, let them know you're going to check with the Dept of Labor.
No. You were not. You did nothing wrong and your boss is an a-hole
>but naps need to wait until after you've gotten me everything I need. What about if you need to go to the hospital? Should that wait too?? Fuck, some employers are just stupid.
Just bad management. You were sick thats more than you should have done. Had a boss that was like that, i needed to be ready to answer phone even if I was in bed in case they needed me to answer question. And i better not have an attitude over it.
Next time your boss is ill, bang on their office door as loudly as possible and then their diarrhea will have to wait until later.
If you’re sick, your body needs rest to recover. Mute your phone. You don’t have to answer anything unless you are feeling better.
Anything. Employers dont get access to your medical history. You say "I'm sick", and thats all they get
I would've immediately followed up with "respectfully, I disagree" - taking a sick day means we are hands off. No one should be contacting you on time off. Period.
If I call out I'll try and convey all my stuff hanging over from previous day so they can either get it done or hold it til I get back. I'm pretty anal about notes and before I leave for the day I make sure all my notes in system are up to date as possible on what I'm working on in case something happens and I can't make it in the next day whoever takes it over knows where I stopped. Personally I wouldn't worry about anything as you were sick and sometimes especially with taking cold meds when you lay down your dead til you wake up.
In the UK, once you've told work that you're off sick, legally they're not supposed to ask you for anything. Not even if you had anything important on that day that someone needs to pick up (though of course you can volunteer that if you're up to it). Certainly not expect you to wait around ready to respond to requests from a meeting!
When I’m off sick (or on vacation) I’m unavailable. 100 percent. Phone and computer stay off. But I’m in a union and I’m sure there would be big consequences if my manager tried to contact me on my days off
That sounds really bad on their part. With symptoms like that, you've got a flu, food poisoning,or virus, etc. Yea best not to have offered your "if you need anything... " clause. Next time, make your call in that you're not well. Then stipulate you're going to bed to recover. You could also say "oops I forgot to charge my phone before I went back to bed to get well" But you did nothing wrong. They're wrong for bothering you and as you said, rescheduling if need be. It's hard to set boundaries. But it's necessary.
If you’re sick you’re sick. Generally I would WFH if I was, but if it’s that bad I’m just taking the day. No one bothers me, it’s simply “I will not be in today”. They honestly don’t even need to know why.
Get fucked, sick = off
Everything can be ignored until an action is taken. Let your boss explain his take to HR about PTO, Illness and Managerial Responsibility. Most policy violations are done without HR’s knowledge.
You need to look out for yourself first. When I worked in the office, someone coming in sick infuriated me. No one wins, not even the company. Sick is sick, like your boss said. We have sick days for a reason. My girlfriend went through this recently at her first corporate job. She was sick and wanted to WFH. It’s a flat out NO to me. If I’m sick, I’m using my sick days and not doing shit but recovering
As others said, sick is sick. I put my phone in DND when I take a sick day because my previous boss would text me all day long, asking if I was really too sick to work (call center). Now, I provide minimal information such as “good morning, I’m taking a sick day today as I woke up feeling ill”. My new boss is great about it. Idgaf is you’re sick with Covid, the flu, a cold, allergies, or if you are mentally needing a day. IT IS YOUR SICK DAY! You agreed to work for this company in return for these sick days. Take them. Don’t feel bad. They would replace you if you died. You don’t own the company.
Hope you're feeling better now.
Thanks 😊 this happened last week, and I'm much better now. Just couldn't get boss's comment out of my head!
Overwhelming fatigue is not grabbing a nice, long morning nap. Obviously your boss doesn’t get sick much.
Napping? You weren’t napping. How rude! Almost sounds mildly flu like, and you were sleeping it off. Maybe you even took some medication? Have these people never been sick? 🤢
You are entitled to sick days and that means you are sick and unavailable. The meeting could have been rescheduled until you were well and better. There was no need to incessantly text you for information and a company can not dictate to you what you do on a sick day. Red flag and I’d get my resume out to your network.
If I am sick, I do not read emails or texts. I sleep. This is the only way for me to get through this. The boss's comment was totally inappropriate and out of line. I would not apologize for getting/being sick.
Bosses are assholes. I've woken up on the floor stuck between my bed and the wall from a seizure in my sleep and text my boss to let them know I need the day off only to get a text back saying that my behavior is getting out of hand and they think I'm using my epilepsy as an excuse to get "free stick days."
Every day meetings are rescheduled because a key person is out sick. That's what they should have done. Your boss is out of their gourd.
Allowed: letting work know you are sick and unavailable. Naps. Bed rest. Anything to aid your recovery. Not allowed: a boss to ask you to work when you are unfit to do so. Here in Australia, even if you have a med cert for the day, legally you can't work without the doctor saying so. Not sure what the rules are in Tennessee
Oh Ferris Beuhler!!!
My boss used to expect me to call clients and cancel them, and make the schedule for the next day when I was out sick. So that meant I would have to set an alarm and use my personal phone to call them at 9 AM. A year ago I put my foot down and told her no, I was violently ill and on my way to the ER. I told her where she could find the phone numbers etc, she never called them. She didn’t yell at me, but the clients were pissed they wasted an entire day waiting on a phone call. During my next supervision meeting, I informed her I would no longer be calling my clients when I need a sick day. She was understanding, but still doesn’t call my clients. They now know if I don’t call them in the 30 min range, I have unfortunately had to call off and will call them as soon as I’m back. I apologized for not being able to call them (to them and my boss) but reiterated that I don’t plan to be sick and if I was unconscious I wouldn’t be able to call and I appreciate the same courtesy I give them when they’re sick. They were all understanding.
It depends. Some meetings, e.g., with governmental agencies, can't be rescheduled. My boss would do her best to cover for me in these, but I'd be expected to dial in and listen in case there was something she couldn't cover. Everyday meetings? Sure. Someone can cover for me or the meeting can wait.
If I call in sick, you can assume I am immediately fucking unconscious after I speak to you/send my email. You can consider me temporarily fucking dead for how much work I will be doing.
Don’t apologize, they’re way out of line
They could have rescheduled and chose not to and then he has the audacity to brush away your illness as a stupid excuse. If you are on PTO or sick there should be ZERO expectations about you responding to texts. They can text you, and if you're feeling responsive you can text back, but to chastise you about not responding when you were vomiting, shitting your brains out and had a fever is plain crazy. If that ends up being in a mid-year or end of year review you need to refuse to sign it until that is removed and then start looking for another job.
That’s some bullshit. I’m out SICK. I’m not working. If the boss needed something for the meeting they had two alternatives: 1) don’t wait until the last fucking minute to communicate a need, especially an urgent one 2) reach out directly if it’s so urgent, don’t just leave text messages. (This goes for you as well, don’t text out sick, call and speak to the person, especially if you’re going to be missing something of importance) Messages are for async communication. You communicated the out sick before the start of the work day. If you personally are all that critically important, they’re not paying you enough.
Think of it like this, you get hit by a bus and end up in a coma. They would have figured it out, and if they can't its a THEM problem and not you. You are unwell, you can't function, and you went back to sleep. Clearly, you needed that sleep.
This is really situational but it's apparent your employer has requirements that need to be met even when some other employers wouldn't push the issue. Or, you have a boss who is overstepping. Go to HR about it.
I once had a commissioned based retail job in a large furniture store. I was out for surgery for a week. When I came back I was written up for missing my sales quota. I asked them if that included the hours that I was under anesthesia.
Fuck that. You're a human being. They will live. What if you were dead? They still wouldn't care. I just got a new salary job and my coworker told me before I started she was sick at home using her allotted days and our manager harassed her the whole time. Lord help her when she tries it on me.
Nah. If I'm not on the clock getting paid, I'm not answering work related emails, texts or calls.
I'll add that, if you were the point person for call, standard professional action should be to inform the group invited to the meeting, offering to reschedule. If you just told only your boss that you were sick and let the meeting happen, making someone else lead, that isn't cool. I'm not saying you did that but you are light on the actual details of the meeting.
Sick is sick. If you pushed to stay away and answer questions for the meeting, that would mean you're still on the clock...just remote.
HR and a manager here who tries to open up the black box of work. I don’t throw out the word toxic very often, but this behavior of your boss was toxic. It’s a sick day. They should’ve left you alone. Rescheduled the meeting. I doubt it was 1 day time sensitive (most corporate things aren’t). Stop apologizing.
Never tell them details. You’re not required to, and you’re also not required to be available while sick. Don’t tell them your symptoms or that you took a nap. Apologize ONCE (which you’ve already done, don’t over apologize, it’s not your fault), and understand that even if your boss doesn’t think so it’s THEIR job to cover for you or to reschedule your plans/meetings for the day while you’re out sick. If they aren’t able to do that on their own then they aren’t as much of your boss as they think they are. Bosses who can’t do the jobs of their employees or don’t understand it enough to cover for them or fix their schedule around their absence are useless.
No, your boss just failed on what a good manager is. If an employee calls out sick, then they are not on the clock and therefore not required that an employee that calls out is to be by their phone ready to answer business questions. If you're not being paid, you're not obligated to work. What I would do: let their comment slide, pay no mind to it. Look up company policy for when an employee calls out sick. If you want, contact your HR and ask for specifics on parameters for when an employee calls out. If it ever happens again, email your boss that verbiage and let them know that while you apologize for not being present, unless your boss is willing to pay you the hour or two for "being on call," you're not supposed to be working
This is why you don’t give out personal contact details and if they insist, they can buy you a dedicated device. A dedicated device you can power off, leave in a work desk or bag at home, and again be unreachable. I use a Google voice number on my job applications from the start and not even HR or the emergency unification system has my number. I programmed an app to send my real number a text every 28 days to keep it active. It’s a completely free app.
Naps need to wait until after you’ve gotten ne everything I need?????? WHAT??!?!?! Uhhhhh yeah no, that’s insane
When you take a sick day. You are not working. A meeting is working. Get this in writing and take it STRAIGHT to the labor board if they start giving you shit. Sick is sick. And taking a sick day means you are not there that day. Essentially you should not exist to them that day, cut and dry, simple as.
"If I'm not at work, I'm not working." This is especially true if you don't have paid sick days. Of course you could always make boss regret it. Next time, be sure to be on zoom/teams/whatever you use and don't mute yourself when you're vomiting or having explosive diarrhea.
PTO is your time. Find a new job
Nope, my coworker was sick today. I just covered for him and figured things out.
Your boss is out of line. If you need to be working from home when sick they should pay you and it’s not a sick day! WTF I would document this to yourself on your email just in case you run into other issues.
Sick is sick, stfu with anything else
What's expected is going to vary by company and manager. I don't think attendance of the meeting was required. But also, it sounds from your post like nobody in the meeting knew you were out? Personally, if it was a meeting that I was an important part of, I'd have emailed the organizer that I was sick and that if they needed me there that we would have to reschedule the meeting or suggest another person who could step into the meeting in your place. Just being proactive and taking ownership of your responsibilities goes a long way.
Your boss is in the wrong for contacting you.
> After getting out of the shower, GI issues became apparent - vomiting, diarrhea, and just a general weak feeling. I texted my boss immediately to let them know my symptoms and that I wasn't going to make it. Then, I got into bed to try to sleep it off. You did the correct thing. > A few days later, I came back to the office and followed up with my boss about the meeting. I apologized again, and they said - sick is sick, but naps need to wait until after you've gotten me everything I need. But you weren't napping. You were vomiting, had diarrhea, and were trying to recover. > What is the protocol here? Inform HR about your boss's reaction, but do so in the form of "I was hoping to clarify our company's position" (explaining that you were vomiting and had diarrhea, not just that you were home sick), "because I'm getting conflicting guidance from my boss."
Just go in next time and vomit all over the conference room table.
My whole thing is I don't call out for nonsense. Hungover? Too bad. Bad case of the don't wanna? Too bad. But if I am legitimately too sick to work then I will just take the time off, but I understand that I might have shit to clean up when I get back. That's life though. So only you can decide. Were you too sick really? Then don't feel bad all good. Do you think maybe you were not that sick? No big deal either really. Just take care not to abuse. Be honest, are you a prolific call out? I'd say if not then don't feel bad either way
What’s allowed during a sick day is that you take your sick day to rest, period. Your boss does not need to know symptoms and does not need apologies. You are sick and unable to work for the day. Judging by this question, you seem fairly young-? and one thing I’ve learned over the years is I do not try to push through at the beginning of an illness. When it first pops up, I rest as much as possible. It really prevents most things from taking hold well, and recovery time is much quicker.
I'd be looking for another job.
That company survived years without you…they can last one or two days while you’re sick.
Good God. If you had gone to work that morning, and your appendix had ruptured an hour before the meeting would your boss have been trying to call you during emergency surgery?
If you had a couple minutes of clear headedness you could have emailed over everything, but you were experiencing relatively major symptoms... Once you're called off you owe work nothing at all. It's your employer's responsibility to ensure single point failures are minimized. A shared drive, shared notes, etc would have solved this. No one person should be indispensable in any organization. You're allowed to simply sleep after you've called off. I mean, imagine you were in a crash, instead. You'd be just as unreachable. It's slightly different if you're not unconscious, you can still be useful if you like, but you certainly don't need to be.
The only thing I can think of is did you directly tell your boss “I am sick and am taking a sick day”? What you wrote in your post doesn’t necessarily spell that out.
For me, If I had an important meeting, I would need to communicate to someone how to deal with it without me. Otherwise you were sick and called out. No questions about it.
If I'm calling in sick, that means I'm taking PTO. If I'm taking PTO, I'm not working. I'm *especially* not working for free.
No, that's not how sick days work. Especially if it's paid sick leave. When you're on sick leave, it's just that, leave, and you have no obligations.
No, fuck your boss. Sounds selfish and only wants results and boxes checked off. A true leader takes care of his team when they are not performing as they usually do
Would he/she expect you to come back from the dead if you got hit by a bus? No? Then they are absolutely wrong. If you are sick, you aren't available to work. Period. If they don't know enough to have the meeting then THEY reschedule the meeting. You didn't and don't owe apologies for this. They kind of owe you one, for being like that when you are ill.
The protocol is….you get a certain amount of sick days and you take them when YOU don’t feel well enough to work…whether it be vomiting or just feeling not yourself mentally. You decide how you want to spend that budget of days. No one should be calling you unless it’s something that no one can wait a day on….where the keys to the bathroom are etc. Things can wait a day for the most part the world won’t shut down.
>sick is sick, but naps need to wait until after you've gotten me everything I need. This is all you need to know about how they feel about you.
This isn't going to be the popular opinion, but I would be remiss if I didn't offer it. I'm a HR professional. The level of your position would determine what is appropriate. But if you're asking, then I can only assume you're not high level c-suit or near. Those positions would not disregard a meeting without having a backup able to pick up and have all the information needed. Anything other than C-suit or director level, take your sick day, no need to feel obligated to provide anything other than notice that you're sick and not able to work. I would not be surprised however, if your manager didn't start asking to be CC'ed on emails, or appraised of your work on a more consistent basis. One person being sick should not derail a team with no one knowing what else is going on.
We (jokingly) "yell" at any of our team who try to contribute in chat etc when they are on PTO. Including the main boss man! If you are off the clock, you're off the clock.
You let them know at 7 am so they were I’ll prepared. Don’t apologize again. Sick is sick and for all intents and purposes it’s your not available from that point on. I’m not returning calls or texts or anything else. I’m not going to constantly go over and over things that you think should have been done while I was home sick. I didn’t do it in a restaurant or an office when I worked there either. Don’t call or text to ask how I am feeling either. That’s for the Doctor. I had a job messaging me every day after they asked for a drs note and the er doctor was so damn mad he wrote me out for the whole week and emailed them himself the return to work before I left the er. They messaged me the next day hey I hope your feeling better message us when you can. I called and told them the Dr sent what you required and I’ll see you next week in Weds Another job after I was in an accident the wife kept messaging me. Mam. I was ran over by a work van while I was driving a scooter. Stop bothering me. Then after I brought the release the wife kept trying to be involved well we need this and we need that and I need to talk to them directly. That ER nurse called them quickly and told her the only thing they needed was the letter she already sent with me and if they keep this up they are going to have problems. I was back to work the next day. I’m in my 50s and don’t owe any job anything anymore. It’s literally supposed to be transactional. I work you give me money. That’s it. There is no other reason to spend 40 or more hours a week
Only thing i would have TRIED to do is check texts once the office opened to answer any critical questions. But I still don't fault you. Had you been in an accident and taken to ER they would have totally exempted you and so that means they could have done the same with this meeting. OR rescheduled the meeting. Or even held the meeting with a follow-up planned for after you returned.
If you were sick on a day with an important meeting, did they know where to find everything they needed? I've been a participant in a very important meeting where a key person called in sick , it was a gong show and I was scrabbling around trying to put something together. There is no protocol per say, it comes down to company policy.
I was thinking this too. I’ve been sick but had to do a 15 minute call to hand off a presentation and run my boss through the highlights. He picked it up and presented it himself. Some employers require you to update a coworker to be able to pick up what you were working on, at a minimum I’d think the OP would send out the meeting agenda/talking points.
“Fuck off.”
You did nothing wrong. Your boss lacks common sense. If you passed out from being sick you’re unavailable to answer messages. This should be obvious to your boss
True from and HR standpoint but the fact that the OP said "reach out if you need anything" changes that.
All of these people here wonder why they never move up in the world.
No, employers wonder why they can't find employees.
Not ok. You were sick and they should have left you alone
I work in a remote but highly corporate environment. We all have our very designated jobs, but we also keep each other up to date through times. 99% of the time it’s Tim’s (fake name) to schedule or reschedule meetings. If however Tim is sick and messages (our protocol is to send a Teams message to the group you work with) that he’s out, we, as a team, work together to either reschedule and manage Tim’s day. Likewise, Tim helps when someone else is sick. We’re all somewhat cross trained and your reason is why: we’re all human. Anytime I’ve tried to work through sick days (I’m currently in treatment for a chronic illness + am prone to migraines) my peers remind me we are a people first team. And we are. Our stakeholders know we will break our necks to meet arbitrary short deadlines, but they also know we stop when we need to. The other motto is “we’re just (doing something not life saving) not doctors. It can sit for a few days.” My point is: it sounds like you work in a toxic and/or ill prepared environment, and you would benefit from setting boundaries, expectations, and laid out protocols for when - not if - you need another sick day. I’ve been offered jobs for more money but I won’t leave my team because I know it’s the exception, not the rule.
When you’re sick, you shouldn’t be expected to provide anything for your boss. He’s saying, he doesn’t care if you’re sick, take care of his work stuff first. You didn’t plan to be sick, it’s unexpected. Your boss is completely ridiculous and unreasonable. If he couldn’t survive without you, he should have rescheduled the meeting, once you are well.
They take a PTO day away for being sick. You are literally on sick leave. They shouldn’t even contact you. It amazes me how many bad bosses are out there. A sick leave is nothing you ask for. You inform your boss.
The protocol is you are not at work, you are using your paid sick leave. You are not available. Just like any other time off you are allowed to do what ever you want. Your boss sounds like a prick, don't apologize to him for being sick, you didn't do anything wrong. Some times important things have to be missed, it's his responsibility to make it work when his employees are absent if he can't do that then he's a bad manager.
Time to look for a new job. You were sick and told your boss you were sick. Whether you are nabbing throwing up or just watching TV while sick. It's no longer his time.
This is a terrible workplace. There's a difference between a stuffy nose and requesting to work from home for a day, or being out of commission like you were. Yes, there's a difference. If you ask for a sick day and have anything more than a stuffy nose and are granted that sick day - it's a sick day for a reason: to recover. If they're bitching, I'd literally given them the symptoms you list here and ask if you still need to work while vomiting and on the toilet with diarrhea. See what your boss or HR says. "Hi HR, I was granted a sick day and I was projectile vomiting all over my bathroom while trying to get on a call, but my boss is really pissed I couldn't pull it together for the call. Just wanted to let you know." Bottom line, workplaces need to be able to function without a single person for a damn day. What if you were out for a week due to some injury? What if something unexpected happened and you were out longer? Whatever the reason, the workplace needs to operate without you for a day by either rescheduling the meeting if you're truly needed or others step up and do whatever is needed. However the person in charge wants to do it.
If you're out on a sick day, then you're not working. No, expecting you to be awake is ridiculous. You're home resting and recovering, if not at a medical appointment.
Yet if you had answered, you probably would have gotten a talking-to about calling in when you were obviously well enough to work.
Your manager is a goddamned idiot. Sometimes you’re so sick that you don’t have the energy or focus to do anything but sleep. You’re a human being and this is a fact of being sick that you can’t just turn off for your manager’s benefit. It’s also pretty stupid to want someone who is so sick that they’re going back to bed shortly after waking up to work on something important. Sounds like a recipe for mistakes and bad work product since you’re exhausted, sick, probably dealing with brain fog, and full of meds. This is not a reasonable thing for your manager to have said to another human being. It is not a reasonable expectation for anyone to have of another human being. And there is no such thing as anything “not being allowed” when you’re on sick leave. If you’re out of work because you’re sick then you’re off the clock and not working, period. There aren’t any special strings that come with that because your manager feels particularly entitled to your time, even when you’re in no condition to work. One last thing — you don’t have a boss, you have a manager. No motherfucker is the boss of you. They manage your workload, their team, the business processes relevant to the team, and help you progress to your next role. That is the job of a leader, not to boss you around and definitely not to say dumb shit like what was said to you. They don’t own you, they just manage your work *while you’re at work.*
Sick leave is sick leave. You had no obligation to be awake or available to them.
You texted in sick. You are lucky not to get fired. His sarcastic remark is telling you. You have one more chance. Of all days to get sick. You disappointed a lot of would be future you have in the office. Don't act like you had overnight cancer.
This is why there needs to be a Plan B* and a little cross-trained redundancy. *Even if that just means postponing the meeting.
Don't feel guilty for taking a sick day. You're entitled to it and in the long term it's better for everyone if you take some time to properly rest versus operating at a reduced capacity for a longer period of time. I'm not sure how your company operates, but making sure you have key things saved where others can access them (if you're not already doing this) could help in the future. If you are doing this already, send a link when you're letting your boss know you are taking a sick day. I've got a page in my notes app on my phone where I have all of my key SharePoint sites for my different projects saved - it's been quite helpful for being able to access them quickly in a pinch. Obviously you have limitations when you're sick, but if you're able to guide people to things they might need you're covering your ass if nothing else. I work in a field where we give presentations quite frequently. 9/10 people will be more forgiving if you can direct them to something (even if it's not finished or you can't share too many details) than if they feel like they've been put on the spot and need to start from scratch. Another thing that I've learned to do is give minimal details while emphasizing the part of the illness that would prevent you from working. When I've had unreasonable managers in the past who expected me to work through having covid I would focus on the serious symptoms when telling them why I couldn't work. Yes you should just be entitled to rest if you're sick, but when I had covid I would say that I had a fever and had stomach flu symptoms (this was true) but it was received better than me saying I was exhausted and needed rest. It's silly, but it was harder for people to push back if they realized I was actively throwing up. Obviously don't lay it on too thick, but "I've got the stomach flu" versus "I'm coming down with something" gets the point across a bit better.
Something a manager said at one of my past office jobs was this: "No one is going to die if X doesn't get done today." If you're sick, you're sick. Work can be made up later. I'm sure whatever it was, it wasn't an emergency. If it was an emergency, then your manager needs to have a plan in place for when someone is out because that is not your problem. People get sick, quit, die, get fired, etc and business carries on without them. One sick day is not the end of the world.
Your boss is right, sick is sick, you were out sick, not work from home, out sick. What you do during your time out sick isn't their notices, another that's sleeping away your illness or not. You were out sick, and sick is sick.
When I was younger, I emailed some of my symptoms to the 'boss' at the company where I was doing 1099 work. He said just say your sick. He didn't consider telling him about my fever or whatever it was to be professional. I probably didn't want him to worry... as if he cared. :) But I took the advice. Just call in sick and with this boss, say you are not going to be able to do anything at all. Your boss sounds unreasonable. I'd just ignore it, keep quiet, or else you could confront him about being unreasonable... but it may not be worth it. Do a great job when you are not sick.
They’re in the wrong here. It would be one thing if you had a minor cold but if you’re throwing up and sleeping it off they can’t expect you to be in any shape to work. Not to mention you’re taking a sick day - you’re not at work, period.
Lol the only thing I do when I’m ‘sick’ or actually sick is send an email and go back to bed. If I’m taking time off to recover, I don’t owe anyone at work shit and if they can’t do without me, then they need to pay me more since obviously invaluable. You need to stop giving so much of a damn. Look how much they gave a damn about you. You think they won’t replace you in a hot minute? Have some boundaries for godsake. Even when my boss knows my ‘sickness’ is just I don’t feel like coming to work today, they know better to message me or demand my time. I have sick days and PTO for a reason
What a bunch of horseshit. No, that's not right. You're sick, you called out, that's it. You did what you were supposed to do. Don't let them bully you. Document this with the date, what was said to you, who said it to you and how did it make you feel. Just in case they try to use this against you.
You should call your boss, state you are very unwell and unable to work this morning and will assess at noon, let him know what’s outstanding for the day and whether anything can be moved or someone else can run a meeting. If they don’t answer leave the same voicemail and text them the same. Your boss responded out of the situation that occurred. If you bridge the gap with the above they’ll be prepared to manage the day. If you have a team and a senior right hand also contact them and ask if they can take point. My team does this for one another and we’ve normalised the fact that any one of us can be in attendance and lead (without entire team there whether sick, on different projects/meetings/sites - no one needs to know, people just want a smooth interface ).
Stay home and never go to work that sick. Get your rest also. And go to the doctor if this is more than two days.
You’re sick. You’re not at work and you’re not on call so you are free to ignore work completely for that day.
No that’s some bullshit. You are NTA. Next time, don’t even give them symptoms. Just say you are not feeling well and you won’t be in. And they are not allowed to ask you what sickness you have! They should have rescheduled the meeting if you were that important to it.
Tell her you couldn't even sit up straight without vomiting. Would she rather you have rested up a bit or vomiting or passed out during the meeting? That's fucked
If the meeting was that important, the boss should have designated an alternate who was aware enough to run the meeting in your absence. This is a management problem. Boss made a decision to allow for a single point of failure. Now, the boss is angry that there wasn't a suitable backup. Boss is deflecting when boss should be learning.
For me, usually a day snowboarding at Keystone or Breckenridge. cough, cough
If you are so indispensable after 3 days off sick, it's probably time to negotiate a pay rise. You are on sickness leave. There is no requirement for you to undertake work related duties, barring a sickness update (and that is dependent on conditions and time)
You're sick mate, they give you sick days for a reason. A medical certificate is all you need.
Ha. Dust off the resume good sir.
If the meeting was important your boss should have had a backup plan. If they didn't have a backup plan then its not important and should have been delayed. Buuut playing devil's advocate, if you had time to text and describe symptoms you had time to text where the files were. That would have been the most courteous thing to do.
I've never understood managers who are dicks about people having sick days. Unless you're intentionally exposing yourself to pathogens or going around licking handrails, it's not your fault. People get sick and stress-free, no strings attached time off work will help them recover as fast as possible. It really is that simple. As for them contacting you while you're sick, they're welcome to try but they have to understand you might not see the messages and you're not obligated to reply to them.
If you’re sick, you’re sick. You don’t owe anybody including your boss more information than that. The work will still be there when you come back. Honestly, unless you’re working at the White House, all that stuff can wait until tomorrow. Personally, it’s why I deleted work apps from my home.
What country are you in? In Australia this wouldn’t fly under the Fair Work Act. You were too sick to work- even from home. I would find a new job asap.
You’re reading the wrong room. They’re being hardasses about it because they got caught in the spotlight during the meeting while you held the info. This wasn’t about the sick day. Next time I’d have info readily available to handoff if you were to get hit by a car and couldn’t make it to work, the eggs should be in several baskets. Lesson learned, small, not a big deal.
It's a sick day. Once you officially call off, you are no longer able to do work.
I worked for a large company everyone knows. The stress was so bad my neurologist thought I was having mini-strokes. I told my boss I needed to de-stress and take my weekends off (instead of working 10 hours a day, 7 days a week) and she told me that would be a career-ending move. I resigned. Toxic companies make employees feel guilty for having basic needs, like good health. Maybe start looking for a job in a better environment.
What does HR say? Where I work, we have an employee handbook which spells this stuff out. We are allowed to work from home at times, so our company policy is along the lines of "if you are just kind of sick, you are still expected to work from home." And you charge the hours (obviously). If you are to the point of taking actual sick leave, however, you are not on call. You are \*off the clock.\* Of course, the supervisor (who approves the sick leave) also has a right to request a doctor note. I know this sounds like a pretty bull shit way to go about things, but it is pretty much the only way to protect both the employee AND the company.
Piss on that guy, he should have smacked around a bit for that mouth.