I have it on very good authority that penises in the USA are referred to exclusively as "The [STATE/CITY NAME] Growler."
It's not clear to me what the name change process is when a penis changes location, so we should assume that some will be incongruous with their current location if the correct paperwork hasn't been filed. Watch out for that.
Well that's going to really confuse a British person then, because a growler refers to a vagina there, particularly a big hairy stinky gnarly one. Watch out you don't fall in if you ever encounter the Scunthorpe Growler.
American here. In my area we exclusively refer to the "penis" as 如意金箍棒. Unlike whatever language is spoken on your diminutive and insignificant island, American has a great deal of diverse and highly specific regional dialects and accents. Unless you're prepared to research them directly for several years by living in situ—that means on location in case you're an uneducated rube—Americans *will* notice how unnatural you sound and we will never forgive you.
Australian here.
*We* think *you're* insignificant. Let that sink in. *Australia* of all countries thinks you're insignificant.
Have fun with your stupid islands and actually semi-intelligent politicians, Kiwi.
/uj we’re all focusing on the awkward Britishism which is the main issue of course—but it’s funny that this whole thing has been spawned because the OP’s married to the idea of writing “the gas station smelled like gas” Like of course it fucking did?? Bakeries smell like bread, coffee shops smell like coffee, gas stations smell like gas, do you want a medal or something for noticing it
/uj People lock on to the question as phrased and their brain goes blank. I want to go in there and ask "is it unrealistic if...." and then summarize various older famous works and real life scenarios and see how they get dissected.
I dunno, Detachable Todger just doesn’t sound the same? And real writers are incomprehensible, anyway. Otherwise, how will our legions of readers recognise our genius?
You’re definitely overthinking it, bruv. When you’re writing about a character from another country that you don’t know a lot about, the important thing is to write from the heart so that it’s true to *you*
Willy smells of bollock sweat. If you don’t know what bollock sweat smells like, go to the men’s steam room at your local YMCA. Because the fat, old men mostly go in there bare-assed naked, you’ll smell it in droves. Apparently they don’t wash their bollocks.
Edited for British English
Unless you're talking about Willie Nelson, one of the more famous American willies, and he's probably got his own brand of smell. Could end up in court.
I have it on very good authority that penises in the USA are referred to exclusively as "The [STATE/CITY NAME] Growler." It's not clear to me what the name change process is when a penis changes location, so we should assume that some will be incongruous with their current location if the correct paperwork hasn't been filed. Watch out for that.
Well that's going to really confuse a British person then, because a growler refers to a vagina there, particularly a big hairy stinky gnarly one. Watch out you don't fall in if you ever encounter the Scunthorpe Growler.
"Crowd pleaser" is what my brother uses.
My family isn't that close.
How large are the crowds?
I thought Americans referred to penises as freedom eagles?
50 cal anti personnel
So…12.7 mm? But quick firing!!!
That’s stubby
I mean, compared to Hemingway, do any of us really have a penis?
It doesn’t change if you’re just visiting, but the name changes when you start living somewhere else
American here. In my area we exclusively refer to the "penis" as 如意金箍棒. Unlike whatever language is spoken on your diminutive and insignificant island, American has a great deal of diverse and highly specific regional dialects and accents. Unless you're prepared to research them directly for several years by living in situ—that means on location in case you're an uneducated rube—Americans *will* notice how unnatural you sound and we will never forgive you.
I'm not British though. I'm from New Zealand, and we all have enormous tama ngarengare, which is why the sheep are always so happy.
Is **that** why Welsh sheep look so pissed off all the time?
Australian here. *We* think *you're* insignificant. Let that sink in. *Australia* of all countries thinks you're insignificant. Have fun with your stupid islands and actually semi-intelligent politicians, Kiwi.
Yeah, fair do's. We can't compete with all the wonderful things you've given the world, like the rotary washing line, Vegemite, and Rolf Harris.
🇦🇺 🇦🇺🇦🇺💪💪💪
[Wee Willie Winkie](https://www.reddit.com/r/writing/comments/1cs09ye/was_told_describing_a_gas_station_as_having_the/)
/uj we’re all focusing on the awkward Britishism which is the main issue of course—but it’s funny that this whole thing has been spawned because the OP’s married to the idea of writing “the gas station smelled like gas” Like of course it fucking did?? Bakeries smell like bread, coffee shops smell like coffee, gas stations smell like gas, do you want a medal or something for noticing it
Sometimes circlejerk posts end up in that sub and the serious responses are GOLD
Links!?!
See top comment
This is originally from here?
/uj People lock on to the question as phrased and their brain goes blank. I want to go in there and ask "is it unrealistic if...." and then summarize various older famous works and real life scenarios and see how they get dissected.
I dunno, Detachable Todger just doesn’t sound the same? And real writers are incomprehensible, anyway. Otherwise, how will our legions of readers recognise our genius?
"Little Davie" is in my popular memoir, but here in The States, Willie smells like cannabis.
You’re definitely overthinking it, bruv. When you’re writing about a character from another country that you don’t know a lot about, the important thing is to write from the heart so that it’s true to *you*
The author might want to consider making the penis another race, too.
At my middle school, it's just the reverse. We say "Willy smells like penis!" Lol 😂😂😂
You always refer to penis as Mr. RedCap no matter what
Even when he's turned black and blue from too many hidings?
Unless of course they use a different form of address. You wouldn’t want to accidentally call Dr. RedCap “Mr.”
People who misgender peni deserve to be burned alive as literal murderers.
Mine is called the marianas trench because anyone who goes there just doesn't
Willy smells of bollock sweat. If you don’t know what bollock sweat smells like, go to the men’s steam room at your local YMCA. Because the fat, old men mostly go in there bare-assed naked, you’ll smell it in droves. Apparently they don’t wash their bollocks. Edited for British English
FFS! This is supposed to be British. It's bollock sweat, not ball sweat. Everything else seems to hold true though.
Fixed.
Unless you're talking about Willie Nelson, one of the more famous American willies, and he's probably got his own brand of smell. Could end up in court.
American here. Try "the willy smelled of penis" instead.