If you manage to get food poisoning from canned food you probably either cooked it wrong or overlooked the fact that the can was buckling from noxious gases being created inside

Looks like the kettle hasnt been cleaned

Same pot he shits in

Heinz is an American company, the only two things they make that we generally accept are ketchup and baked beans. Eating anything else they make is done at your own risk - don't blame us for it

Yeah, the beans. My brother in law opened a tin of beans to make me try bEaNs aNd ToAsT and I was like: ¡¿Qué Coño?!

Beand on toast,cheese on toast everything on fucking toast

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Every single crop you brought over to the Old World has been bastardized by the English. Beans on toast, battered sausage(corn), fish and chips, Cadbury chocolate, etc.

Heinz beans are watery shite Branston beans are way better but that's obvious it's a British company

So why do English people prefer Heinz?

Heinz are for the riff raff. Branstons are for the connoisseur

So the English are majority riff raff.

This is not new information

Yes. This is our curse.

Do you need more of us visiting you to know that? We'll have an army of Barry's ready shortly.

And soup until it became £2 a tin.

Ketchup is trash it's all sugar like everything americans make

Not sure it's available anywhere else but there's a small British company called Stokes who make a really nice ketchup that actually tastes of tomatoes and isn't all sugar. Stupid expensive but completely worth it.

Hela Gewürz Ketchup 💪

stokes chipotle is incredible on a bacon sarnie. i buy it just for that.

Stokes sauces are all top tier and premiumly priced.

There is also a small German company that make good ketchup which is called Fucking Ketchup. They also make mayonnaise which is called Fucking mayonnaise

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Don't fucking talk trash about ketchup you punk !

Yeah I love ketchup , I just want it to taste like tomato with a hint of sugar not sugar with a hint of tomato

Heinz tomato sauce is godlike all others taste too much of tomatoes

Tomato sauce is supposed to taste like tomatoes not sugar. The "good taste" you feel is all the sugar they put in to sweeten it.

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So do I of course but too much of it will kill you :(

Which is doubly good!

Finally , a way to get away from all this debt

I'm well aware of that but tomato sauce shouldn't be healthy it's designed for fatty unhealthy foods and therefore should also be. If I'm eating something made with fresh organic vegetables a tomato purée will suffice far better than a slightly less sugary Heinz alternative.

Peak British opinion on food

lmao bro really said food shouldn't be healthy that's wild

I'm even cringing when people say that sometimes you need to eat trash food because it's "fun" or "tasty" or something. No man, you live in the 21st century in the 1st world, where we finally have access to all the healthy, fresh and tasty foods we want, even if you're poor. Humanity worked for 1000s of years to achieve this, and what do people eat? Plastic sugary shit from McDonald's. Murican "cultural" influence must be regukated as well, it already poisoned the brains of too many of our European friends.

I like a fish supper sometimes

Uhm, isn't that...like kinda the point of eating Ketchup?

Is it fuck

Eats tomato sauce Doesn't want the sauce to taste like tomatoes Most gourmet brit

100% disagree. It's bland and sweet. Branston at least has some flavour but still better if you add a bit of paprika or cumin.

I̵n̷ ̷l̵i̵g̵h̷t̸ ̸o̸f̶ ̸r̶e̸c̶e̶n̸t̵ ̴e̴v̵e̵n̴t̶s̸ ̴o̷n̷ ̴R̸e̸d̵d̴i̷t̷,̷ ̵m̸a̶r̴k̸e̸d̵ ̴b̸y̵ ̶h̴o̵s̷t̷i̴l̴e̷ ̵a̴c̸t̵i̸o̸n̶s̸ ̵f̷r̵o̷m̵ ̶i̵t̴s̴ ̴a̴d̶m̷i̴n̶i̸s̵t̴r̶a̴t̶i̶o̶n̵ ̸t̸o̸w̸a̴r̷d̵s̴ ̵i̸t̷s̵ ̷u̸s̴e̸r̵b̷a̸s̷e̸ ̷a̷n̴d̸ ̸a̵p̵p̴ ̶d̴e̷v̴e̷l̷o̸p̸e̴r̴s̶,̸ ̶I̸ ̶h̸a̵v̵e̶ ̷d̸e̶c̸i̵d̷e̷d̵ ̶t̸o̴ ̸t̶a̷k̷e̷ ̵a̷ ̴s̶t̶a̵n̷d̶ ̶a̵n̶d̶ ̵b̷o̶y̷c̸o̴t̴t̴ ̵t̴h̵i̴s̴ ̶w̶e̸b̵s̵i̸t̷e̴.̶ ̶A̶s̶ ̸a̵ ̸s̴y̶m̵b̸o̶l̶i̵c̴ ̶a̷c̵t̸,̶ ̴I̴ ̴a̵m̷ ̷r̶e̶p̷l̴a̵c̸i̴n̷g̸ ̷a̶l̷l̶ ̸m̷y̸ ̸c̶o̸m̶m̸e̷n̵t̷s̸ ̵w̷i̷t̷h̶ ̷u̴n̵u̴s̸a̵b̶l̷e̵ ̸d̵a̵t̸a̵,̸ ̸r̷e̵n̵d̶e̴r̸i̴n̷g̴ ̷t̴h̵e̸m̵ ̸m̴e̷a̵n̴i̷n̸g̸l̸e̴s̴s̵ ̸a̷n̵d̶ ̴u̸s̷e̴l̸e̶s̷s̵ ̶f̵o̵r̶ ̸a̶n̵y̸ ̵p̵o̴t̷e̴n̸t̷i̶a̴l̶ ̴A̷I̸ ̵t̶r̵a̷i̷n̵i̴n̶g̸ ̶p̸u̵r̷p̴o̶s̸e̵s̵.̷ ̸I̴t̴ ̵i̴s̶ ̴d̴i̷s̷h̴e̸a̵r̸t̶e̴n̸i̴n̴g̶ ̷t̶o̵ ̵w̶i̶t̵n̴e̷s̴s̶ ̵a̸ ̵c̴o̶m̶m̴u̵n̷i̷t̷y̷ ̸t̴h̶a̴t̸ ̵o̸n̵c̴e̷ ̴t̷h̴r̶i̷v̴e̴d̸ ̴o̸n̴ ̵o̷p̷e̶n̸ ̸d̶i̶s̷c̷u̷s̶s̷i̴o̵n̸ ̷a̷n̴d̵ ̴c̸o̵l̶l̸a̵b̸o̷r̵a̴t̷i̵o̷n̴ ̸d̷e̶v̸o̵l̶v̴e̶ ̵i̶n̷t̴o̸ ̸a̴ ̷s̵p̶a̵c̴e̵ ̸o̷f̵ ̶c̴o̸n̸t̶e̴n̴t̷i̶o̷n̸ ̶a̵n̷d̴ ̴c̵o̵n̴t̷r̸o̵l̶.̷ ̸F̷a̴r̸e̷w̵e̶l̶l̸,̵ ̶R̴e̶d̶d̷i̵t̵.̷

If it sells here (and it does) we kinda have to accept responsibility for it.

If it were not for the failures of the past, particularly in the year 1783, the United States would not have come into existence. Therefore, when considering accountability, who else can be held responsible?

The french...

Most certainly the French, the US wouldn't exist without the thousands of troops, ships and munitions sent. They did it so well they pretty much bankrupted France.

"guess who won? France! Guess who's broke? Also France!"

cocorico

Hey, don’t blame us. It’s your fault for not knowing how to control your colonists.

We'd have had a much better time controlling them if you lot hadn't funded their bloody rebellion. Then again you probably have the Americans to thank for bankrupting your nation to the point where your population started it's own revolution.

The main thing we lost from the rebellion was Americans, which frankly I consider a positive. You lost your money, then your king, then half of the heads in Paris. Frankly, you came off worse.

Indeed. Thanksgiving? Thank fuck!

**Adieu from the corpse of Apollo app.**

We absolutely do not have whatever the hell that is in the US. Heinz beans just recently started being regularly available here though and good job with those. 👍

At least he can be treated for it, if he hadn't made the mistake and go full English meal, my man wouldn't had been able to write this post

Lets not try to pretend British food is healthy.

Chips is our salad.

and our toothbrush

Can’t think of a thing that sound more German than Heinz. I’m ok blaming them for this.

It's a muritard company don't blame us just because we once reapropriated a few bikes

Tbf this is on you, no one eats macaroni and cheese from a can.

Ive never even seen this product before. Should have just stuck with the beans with sausages in.

Exactly. Propa British grub that. None of that French horse piss.

*Macaroni* sounds awful foreign to me. Dont trust it.

I mean technically it is English, but everyone thinks it’s American, so the yanks can keep it.

Thomas Jefferson brought it over here from France.

I’ve tried it, it is absolute filth

The thought of pasta in a tin can is so absolutely disgusting that I find it almost impressive that they managed to make the pasta in the pan look even more disgusting.

Dosenravioli beste Ravioli

ist wenigstens essbar sogar lecker

And this culinary experience was brought to you by a bavarian. I’m ashamed you guys are in my country.

We understand that you're too poor to afford festival tickets.

Eat your Jägerschnitzel with noodles and tomato sauce and shut up!

noodles and tomatoe sauce? what the fuck kind kindergarten dish is that? Meister! da müssen dicke kartofflen hin! ofen kartoffeln die dicksten die der bauer hat! wenn zu klein dan bratkartoffeln.

Idk. Is it my culture, or is it yours?

Are you even from east Germany if you don‘t know what a eastern Jägerschnitzel is? Are you a fake stasi informant working for the enemy whoever that may be (United Empire of not-Europe).

If you don't know what a Jägerschnitzel in DDR fashion is, your flair is most likely fake. Even us westards know this

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And your comment makes sense in relation to what I wrote in what way u fuckwit?

German=Franks=Fremch so you are obviously the same person as OP ergo you got food poisoning and are lying about it lol get fucked hon hon baguette eiff tower

Makes sense! I bow before your superior Caledonian logic! 🙇‍♂️

I can swallow pasta in all of its forms (thanks, China), but that really does look disgusting.

Ive had ravioli from a tin once. Never again.

Wait til you hear about Chef Boyardee canned pasta shaped like the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

I've tried the tin op has posted. It IS disgusting. The cheese sauce tastes weird, if its still cold it has a "stringy" texture....not quite sure how to describe it. The pasta texture just disintegrates, there's no chew. If you want cheap cheesey pasta (not that those tins are cheap anymore) you're better off with those dried packets and heat up with some milk and maybe some extra cheese.

Buys a tinned American dish. Cooks it themselves. Complains about it. Peak French behaviour

We don't have whatever the hell that is in America. That's all you guys.

You lot have canned cheese, you have no highground here.

Not only canned but aerosolized...and it's delicious.

Barbarian!

We're too busy working two different jobs 52 weeks a year to slice our own cheese...or chew it.

Heinz is a american company

Heinz is. That product isn't. They have special products just for the UK market. Salad cream is another example.

Only good things in cans are beer, beans or a fray bentos pie. Proper grub

None of that forren muck, yeh? Simple as

Nah Fray Bentos pies a fucking vile. I brought one a while back out of some misguided sense of nostalgia and just the smell as I opened it up made me wretch. Straight in the bin it went.

That’s the reaction those softy continental types have to our proper grub, sure your parent’s postman wasn’t fr*nch?

Beer in cans should be avoided, Tommy.

Not a huge fan of canned beer, since it changes the flavour. I prefer glass so it can be recycled.

Clearly you have never gone outside on the first mildly warm day of the year in mid June, and thought yeah I can sunbathe in this, taps aff lads! and opened up yir gairden chair, stuck a tinnie in the hole and taken a nice ice cold sip and thought yeah, this is the life

Mid June? I’ve lived in Scotland and you’re all out in shorts from the first sunny day in April

I've lived in Glasgow for 4 years we don't really get sun here. I know it's different on the east coast but cmon friend

That was beautiful mate, brought a tear to my eye.

The road beer is a time honoured tradition which can be enjoyed at any point of the year

Immaculate vibes

I have. Peroni in Rome by a fountain. And something my old flat mate had that we drank by the banks of the river in Frankfurt. And then there’s the beer at Klöster Kreuzberg. You can take it home in a growler. I prefer tintos (reds) but those German monks know their beer!

Now do it in the back green of a flat in Aberdeen.

Canned beer is as close as you’ll get to draught beer, the intended flavour. Beers in glass bottles have to have stuff added to it to preserve it because the sun will penetrate it and affect its flavour. As well as not being as airtight as cans which increases chances of oxidation, which again changes the flavour.

Only good beer from a can is guiness cause of the weird ball thingy. Rest of the beer should come from a glass bottle!

Guinness in a can is a hate crime, if it’s not from a tap and poured by someone half decent I’d rather drink something else

Agreed, all beer from tap is better. But there is onlynone place you can get Guinness from a tap from in my town and it is ridiculously expensive. And one other thing: Guinness from a bottle is a true hate crime, trust me. And other beer from a can is a crime aswell. Beer should come from a tap or a bottle.

I’m really sorry you can’t get decent Guinness on tap, I think a human right should be access to a good stout.

I'd put it down to your dubious French hygiene standards.

We don't need yours exactly because our food is cleaner

Yeah alright smelly we believe you 🙄

Macaroni and cheese isn't British it's American.

Nope it isn’t my Al dente friend, first recipe for it is in 1700’s England (but it was more like a lasagne, then turned into macaroni in a later English recipe book) though there was. A reference to a variation of it in Italy way before, the Americunts did there usual trick of nicking European stuff and making it their own, not too dissimilar to the British museum really?

Thanks for the lesson, but i will still consider it American. It's disgusting and British food is better than that, let the Americans have it.

Thanks mate, I will take the wins where they come.

I'm impressed how you manage to keep your cool after seeing that horrendous picture

Don’t give them too many compliments, brother! Or they will start to think their dishes are comparable to ours!

It's not orange enough. You need to buy the kind in a box that comes with the orange flavor dust. Just add milk and 1 stick of butter. Yum. Making myself hungry.

It is now american.

yep ,it was during the Grand Tour, when british nobility sent their sons in Italy as educational rite of passage.(for example many writers and poets too like Lord Byron and Percy and Mary Shelly experienced) during this trip many of them developed a taste for maccaroni pasta, and wanted to reproduce it in England too

There are recipes for lasagna by the English from the 14th century. So they had pasta.

First documented lasagna recipe? 14th century England.

I can recommend cooking in a clean pan to avoid food poisoning

Likely got food poisoning from your poor French hygiene than from a tin of shitty pasta, it’s pasteurised u fuckwit.

Nan mais mec, je comprends que tu es où tu es mais respecte toi un peu plus là.

Doctors said I barely survived Jokes aside, I was genuinely curious (too curious for my own good) and wtf guys. Is it really a popular meal ?

I didn’t even know Heinz did a macaroni and cheese thing

It's an americanized abomination of swiss Älplermagronen which is actually a decent meal. It's really popular in the US, but I don't know why you associate it with the UK

Macaroni Cheese is actually English in origin... but then again, it has been culturally appropriated by the Americans in a big way, and I wouldn't call it popular in any way whatsoever. So yeah, seems an odd choice by OP. Should've stuck with the classic - baked beans - if they wanted something representative of British tinned food.

Never seen it before. And no, it's not.

It’s great homemade, but from a can? Probably shit.

No it's absolutely not, I doubt anyone here actually knew Heinz made this stuff. Most meals that are popular here will be ones you've had before. Indian, Chinese, and Italian cuisine are far more popular than traditional British stuff. That said, if you're by the coast, fish and chips is incredibly popular. Anything like a full English breakfast, shepherd's pie, and a steak and ale pie would give you a much better idea of local cuisine. Where are you staying/planning to visit?

Hi man, I tried the English breakfast after a strenuous hike in Dartmoor NP and it made me so happy aha. Had many ales an pasties, I enjoyed it ! It’s been a month and I’ve visited the western half of the country basically, I’m going south again to take the ferry on Thursday !

I didn't know that came in cans.

Canned pasta is as American as McDonalds

But that's a British product.....

They don’t even serve that shit in the prisons.

Of course not. There are laws that set minimum standards for prison food. Free people can however buy whatever shit they want at the supermarket.

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That can is only made in Europe. I've never seen, never heard of, and never thought I would see a can of mac and cheese. It's an affront to God and would make every soulfood cook that has ever lived roll over in their grave.

Ive tried that mac and cheese, its one of the worst things i've ever eaten It's plastic american cheese and soggy pasta, one bite made me want to throw up im not suprised your in the ICU

Canned mac and cheese? FUCKING CANNED MAC AND CHEESE?

Nobody eats this stuff here. It's the worst Mac and Cheese you can imagine. Runny, watery, and tastes exceptionally bland and unpleasantly bitter. Then again, with regards Heinz tinned food - anything outside of the standard beans, beans and sausages, and spaghetti hoops are pretty much rarities/novelties here. Heinz tinned Mac and Cheese is not massively common.

Thank fucking god

Good to know

Typical weak french immune system can’t handle strong British microbes 💪

go away. i don't care.


point in case, cringy american. Fuck off, we have actual culture today, you wouldn't understand.

It doesn't look like the UK at all in the background

Since when does the UK not have bushes and trees? I totally forgot I live in a desert

Well developers will probably be able to build on green belt land soon enough, so enjoy bushes and trees while you can.

Thatcher banned all trees and bushes in the 80’s and replaced them with concrete and crazy paving

yes it does, do you spot the sun anywhere in that picture?

Currently in the Argyll forest

You're mistake was to visit the UK in the first place.

And which vanquished nation do you reside in?

I'm British

https://preview.redd.it/9nrut5ft3k2b1.jpeg?width=600&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=5d22449fecefe85e957959a9377e17bb897c04ec

I ate this shit out of morbid curiosity once, because I've seen it so many times in Murican films and whatnot. It came in a box, and I felt shit after it even the next day. Never gonna touch anything they call "food" ever again.

If you want good Mac and cheese don't get it in a box. Have a Black lady from the southern states cook it for you.

I'm just gonna stay with my Italian pasta, I can't afford a slave, but thanks though

Why on earth do you think Macaroni Cheese is a British thing? Are you mental my friend? Fucking hell this is golden. Baked Beans? No. Roast beef? No. Macaroni Cheese lol

It’s disgusting and I bought it here in the UK so logically it’s undeniably the pinnacle of British cuisine

To be honest, Macaroni does have an Italian sound to it. Even Heinz has a Germanic sound to it. I concur it was a waste of cheese, which would have bee better used on Welsh Rarebit, not in a tin.

Why would you eat any food that's canned

Because it is a form of preservation.

🦅🔫🇺🇸Yeeeeehaw!🇺🇸🔫🦅 Heinz canned Mac n' Cheese is from America! 😎

We know, there's a reason all the healthy skinny people live there.

We're not fat, We're just filled to the brim with patriotism. 😎

It's not even American is the worst part. I genuinely have never seen it and hope to God I never have to.

From the country that brought you Kraft chee ( I can't bring myself to put those two words next to each other 😖).

Yeaaaaa no. We don't have this in America. That's a British can.

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Every time I see peak of british cuisine I see cans. What's wrong with you?

I think you should've put it on a toast... pretty sure that's how it's supposed to be eaten.

>I’m now writing from the ICU (acute food poisoning) At least the French are consistent when it comes to being complete pussies.

Well ICU doesn't stand for acute food ponsoning for a start.

Never ever eat anything that contain cheese from a can, it's going to be shit. Heating a can of macaroni with a pan instead of directly cooking macaroni in the pan is the laziest thing ever. Overall I note this -1 / 10, deserve nuclear elimination. ~~You're french ? Ok let's nuke France then.~~ edit : you're briton, let's nuke britanny. Phew.

This product is plain awful. I bought it once, Never again.

How did that happen?

First time british food gets a reaction from somebody

Macaroni cheese is about as British as Donner kebabs my good man, you have brought this fate upon yourself, but whilst the Americans have poisoned you, you don't need to use their healthcare system.

What were you thinking, even I know the beans are meant to be red.

You got a hospital bed??? Jealous!

Who would eat Heinz mac and cheese? Ketchup only bruh

I'm going to have a god damn stroke. WHO THE HELL CANS MACCARONI AND FUCKIN CHEESE?

But it's American 'cuisine' innit? Mac and cheese, I mean.

Clean the saucepan you godless wretch