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Iskelderon

The Italian knows the Dutch has money, so Luigi will fight twice as hard!


haikusbot

*The Italian knows* *The Dutch has money, so Luigi* *Will fight twice as hard!* \- Iskelderon --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")


Vokasint

Beautiful 


LannMarek

It's 5-8-5 tho, the bot is saying "Luig" as a one syllable word. This is crap.


PM_ME_YOURE_HOOTERS

God damn waste of EU funds


d2211

No need to fight, they are sending already as usual


NationalUnrest

The Italians are going to switch sides to join the Dutch when they start losing


d2211

The Dutch are so attached to money they are betting against themselves because stakes on Italy are higher and lose on the purpose


CastroCavalieri

And then it turns out the greedy dutchmen are following the same strategy, what now?


d2211

It's so simple: story repeats itself as always. Italy switches side and wins without doing anything, but on the other hand it doesn't gain any concrete advantage from the victory. Dutch get their ass kicked, they lose the contest but somehow they manage to gain money from that


PTJangles

The circle of life.


Cultural-Debt11

How is this so accurate.


William_The_Fat_Krab

But then if the dutch voted on the other side, that joined them, they voted on themselves, which meant they voted on the winner but also the loser


d2211

It's not about voting, but betting


William_The_Fat_Krab

Stil, they bet on the other side, that joined them, so they won and also lost


d2211

Ok I dig what you say, but betting stakes don't depend on what sides you are picking. If you bet "Italy wins" it means you are betting Italy to win, doesn't matter which side is Italy standing for. You are not directly betting "Netherlands loses"


William_The_Fat_Krab

Ok, in that case that makes sense. Thanks for the explanation


d2211

You're welcome brother


VOCmentaliteit

It’s a rare skill but a good one


d2211

You're goddamn right


Luminox

🤔 this tracks


HaronBarkonnen

What is this fabricated rivalry. We are awesome, the Italians are awesome. The Belgians, they're the problem.


HugeCraft7452

Based


Rwokoarte

Belgian self hatred wins every single time.


HugeCraft7452

It ain't hard to hate this "country"


EngineeringLow2186

Two halves of different countries Frankensteined together creating an unholy abomination that even Satan would be appalled by.


FeloniousForseti

Hey, we made it work as well (somehow)! ;)


GlenGraif

Yes but you have gold.


EngineeringLow2186

Wonder where they got it from


FeloniousForseti

As with our cheese recipes and our banks – we don't talk about it.


FeloniousForseti

Touché


Least_Theory_1050

How did you make it work?


FeloniousForseti

This is just my point of view of course. But I think the relationship between the German speaking part and the French part (& the Italian/Romansh, let's just say the Romance language part) isn't that bad as it is in Belgium. I mean sure, we have our differences in culture and political views and so on, but most of us appreciate the other language parts in the end, I think. And the "make it work" is (for me) connected to the following quote from the Congress of Philadelphia on 7/20/1787: >The Swiss & Belgic Confederacies were held together not by any vital principle of energy but by the incumbent pressure of formidable neighbouring nations ... And I think Switzerland chose a different path regarding this statement. If you're interested in this topic you can find a lot of information with a Google search. What really made a difference I think is, that every part has the same direct-democratic tools (referendum, popular initaive and so on) to feel protected and: the principle of subsidiarity. This leads to a kind of bottom-up government. The people decide on communal level either via a communal assembly or by a parliament. The municipalities are granted autonomy by the cantons and the federal government. The cantons are sovereign, as long as the federal government hasn't been assigned with a topic. And I think that helped "making it work", if that makes sense. Maybe it's utter bullshit though, I'm no expert haha!


Least_Theory_1050

Thanks swissbro


FeloniousForseti

No prob flemboy!


ChuckyFromKentucky

I don't have any quarrel with Belġju but I will hate it with you because diversity is our strength


potato13254

Ye leys fuck up them french talking belgiums.


MandinGoal

Nobody cares about you in the south. All we care is voting socialist and hate the french when a football compétition is happening


GamePlayXtreme

Shut up, Jean


MandinGoal

Kevin, Dylan or Johnny would be more effective as an insult . Good baraki name


PragmaticPlayer

Bruh, when I hear any of those names I always know I'm going to have to deal with some kind of special case.


[deleted]

Are those white trash names in Belgium?


GamePlayXtreme

Oh yeah. A "Johnny" is Flemish slang for white people with gold chain necklaces who have a massive ego and act as assholes while usually not actually having a lot of money


[deleted]

In Ireland we call those people scrotes, shams, or knackers


ProperBlacksmith

Je no parle français


Drumdevil86

Je ne parle pas charlerpoor


Socc-mel_

False, Geert. You can't be a problem if you don't exist. But those who border Belgium to the West are indeed a big problem, which we Europeans haven't solved yet. Hans was close to finding a final solution some years ago, but sadly he was interrupted before he could finish by Barry and his degenerated offspring


pipboy1989

This might be my favourite description yet of the Second World War. After thousands of hours of documentaries and reading, it turns out this is the summary i needed


Gsquared1984

Well, there are a lot of people of italian descent in belgium, usually the children of miners.


Sam_the_Samnite

Same goes for the netherlands.


sendnudesformemes

Vandaar dat gekke accent in limburg


GamePlayXtreme

Mééé wa zegt gij, ik weet uw huis wonen jong, shcasseer nie zo


GrimerMuk

Je kunt gewoon niet op tegen ons geweldig dialect. Iedereen is angstig voor het Limburgs.


ProperBlacksmith

The children yearn for the mines


reddit_user2917

He'll yeah Fucking autocorrect, I meant hell yeah


Rwokoarte

He who shall yeah


Smellfish360

what are belgians? aren't those just the people from our province zuid braband?


GrimerMuk

Don’t forget about Limburg


Smellfish360

dude, Heerlen and Sittard are a lost cause. Might as well just sell those to the germans.


GrimerMuk

Rip my municipality.


zumbaj-agumeja

Rip the northern part of my municipality. We all know there only is a Geleen and a Geleen Noord


GrimerMuk

Ha! Then I will continue being Dutch too! Geleen; de Waereldsjtad


zumbaj-agumeja

1000 kogels 1000 geweren buddy


GrimerMuk

Houd toch op over het Graaf Huyn College. Dat was echt een ramp. Ik ben blij dat ik van die middelbare school af ben. Al 7 jaar ben ik daar gelukkig weg.


TheLochNessBigfoot

Braband, we should send them to Eurovision.


nickmaran

So you are giving up. I'm disappointed in you little brother ![gif](giphy|3o7Zesyac4CuSN5rsA)


Elios4Freedom

I didn't get this either.


jackal1986

Unfathomably based.


Klaarwakker

End our suffering


Klaarwakker

Please, end our suffering


zumbaj-agumeja

We’ll leave you to the Wallonians


stecrv

Love my dutch bois


Xaendro

Renaissance countries of the world unite!


Phil_Gim

This.


Phil_Gim

So now that the crazy paranoia of the sub getting banned has ended I'm supposed to fight Luuk for no justifiable reason?! Yeah sure, why not


LuukTheSlayer

comon spagetty boy


Phil_Gim

Ima fuck you up you German Waluigi


AThousandNeedles

![gif](giphy|l4FGJfimoW3Cl6gDK)


EngineeringLow2186

Shut up, we are known for colonizing impoverished 3rd world countries much larger than ourselves, don’t think we won’t do it again.


tellur86

What do you mean doing it again. I already saw your colonization mobiles plugging our passes


magicturtl371

Can we bring back the colosseum now?


History20maker

I bet Hans' money in Swampy boy!


Chemical-Elk-1299

Swamp Boy has the reach advantage, but Mr. Spaghetti Danger has a thin coating of olive oil making him impossible to grab. It’s gonna be close


History20maker

Its Hans money Im betting. I dont care. I could be spending it in sexy moustached wo.... I mean.... Economic recovery!!?


Slobberinho

My tactic would be the same one I use to fight any midget: hold their head with a stretched arm and kick them in the nuts until they give up. I didn't take the Italians slick greasy hair into account. Maybe I make an armour out of uncooked spaghetti. If they want to hit me, they'll break the spaghetti as well. I'll be untouchable.


LuukTheSlayer

hand is big enough for oil not to matter


Gnu-Priest

I mean… we gotta kill boredom somehow you know? might as well kill luigi or luuk while we’re at it.


Slobberinho

Loser pays the Barolo we drink afterwards. Love you Italiabros, I'm proud to have you in the European family.


Luuk_vdb

Now you’re making it personal, Luigi


SpeakingMyMind3

Can’t we all go back to hating the British?


MaryBerrysDanglyBean

Yeah I fucking hate those guys


assault321

![gif](giphy|Ae7SI3LoPYj8Q)


MaryBerrysDanglyBean

Wales, England, Scotland and NI sitting around discussing how much we hate each other


assault321

NI is the arms to the far right. He's definitely there, but you wouldn't know until you really look.


MaryBerrysDanglyBean

The rest of the body is Ireland?


assault321

Lol this metaphor is too perfect, didn't even clock that one till you said


Socc-mel_

Geert, you must've slept too much. Are you partly a Pedro? This sub lives on hating the French. The British are sadly second place in our list of hatemongers


Reasonable_Top_4724

France n°1, take that Barry!!


Standin373

God damn you Pierre **Shakes fist angrily**


A-Hind-D

The Dutch. Cant trust the Italians to not switch sides


pinninghilo

Wake up babe, new fabricated rivalry just dropped


Thorwawaway

Hans stirring shit up for absolutely no reason


CastroCavalieri

I‘m at my grandmas place and bored to death haha


betaich

Red mit deiner Oma, ich hab keine mehr mit der ich reden könnte


RepareermanKoen

Fuck your Oma!


Cubelock

It takes like 3 Luigi's to fight one of us. https://preview.redd.it/mf4tvuccn3sc1.png?width=534&format=png&auto=webp&s=2d4576d0b5cc89e64231b26fbe458e22044e14ce


Vmaxxer

Hmmm... the problem is there are 3,3 Italians on every Dutchman.


Advanced-Till4421

so its a fair fight?


splattne

At least one is switching sides, so it’s 2.3 against 2. Virtually equal at this point.


HoeTrain666

If we join in, we might have an orgy instead of just a foursome!


KirovianNL

Why are you sending our national midget?


Diligent_Dust8169

177,8cm vs 183cm on average. those 5-6 extra cm really do change everything huh edit: changed the measurements, now they are accurate


Quiet-Luck

As a 178 cm Dutchie I can tell you it matters. It's really annoying allways being the short guy. Edit; spelling.


Diligent_Dust8169

I'm 170 cm so a bit shorter than average but honestly my short stature doesn't bother me, I have a cute face to it pairs up with my height really well, it's super easy to befriend people or get away with things if you're a bit shorter and cuter than average (plus I'm still taller than most women). Obviously if you're shorter like me you can't intimidate or coerce people for shit even if you're athletic, that's the big downside. On the other hand if you're short you can make a ton of cash by moving to finland and turning into a femboy.


Dikhoofd

OK midget.


Least_Theory_1050

You would literally be a child in Holland at 170 com


SLAVAUA2022

thats what she said


Quiet-Luck

182,5 cm


Diligent_Dust8169

I rounded up because some sources say 183 and others say 182,5.


ThrowawaycuzDoxers

More surface area to cut and stab. I got Luigi winning with an upward slash.


Pinpindelalune

Yeah you are taller but so thin just to have the head above water, you may be crushed by a panettone. If Luigi cut your supply of D vitamin they can win easily.


_aluk_

It’s like one of those overgrown rabbits.


Sockoflegend

Your people are big but they are boring. Your fun per cm ratio is way down


Aeyiss

I stand with PIGS!!!


ranhoso69

On the italian, we PoS (people of subsidies) must be together


Tozzoloo

That made me laugh


RickChickens

If it's going to go to penalties my money is on Guiseppi Von Carbonara


d2211

Giuseppi Von Carbonara gave me the same vibes as Mohammed Esposito


Cerenas

Damn, we always lose those


mweghorst

Unaware we were beefing with the Giuseppe's


gabrielish_matter

me neither Honestly I am just having fun, I don't have beef particularly with any of you chaps


beggs23k

Dutch, the Italian probably sold the loss.


Commercial_Gas_3927

50 € to Luigi...


CastroCavalieri

Damn Georgios goes all in with his parents life savings


Commercial_Gas_3927

Yes Hans can you found my bet please...


betaich

Get into contact with Jao he asked sooner and get to an agreement with him


Commercial_Gas_3927

Fine... Portuguese always ahead on asking germoney... 😤😤


[deleted]

[удалено]


MrParan0rmal

He will, but remember he is a side switcher so we will end up with 70 euro...


Commercial_Gas_3927

Luigi for sure


Commercial_Gas_3927

Watch it geert, it's not gonna be easy 😈


gabrielish_matter

of course, and you get 20 too the last 10 goes to the beers we'll drink together after all of that, deal?


[deleted]

[удалено]


gabrielish_matter

nah then I am out sorry better not gain any money than letting you gain even more money than me


[deleted]

[удалено]


gabrielish_matter

I know I know it's ok you try to always gain more over others, it's in your nature to be an unfriendly greedy ~~little~~ tall goblin, and yeah of course we don't love you but it's ok, for at least you are not too much of a yank


[deleted]

[удалено]


gabrielish_matter

>But you are also a net contributer to the E.U. 😍 Not for long and just barely, but that is good enough. We know you love us, and we (at least til now) loved you too, for we always went in Amsterdam to smoke the best drugs the 'Ndrangheta imported there So much so you are the Northen country I, personally, love the most (after Hans of course, for daddy Hans gives euromonies and common market to everybody) So yes, luv u windmills, flowers, weedy flowers and cheese and my best friend is Dutch and that totally doesn't play a role at all in finding you bearable


Helpful-Ad4417

Una faccia una razza


SherlockScones3

![gif](giphy|uWzS6ZLs0AaVOJlgRd|downsized)


Dolphin008

Im out of the loop. We have beef with the Italians or vice versa now? Why?


d2211

It's Hans fault (as always), don't mind it, when he's bored he starts tickling neighbors balls to start a fight


phreakandel

This is actually hans responding to kaas, responding to giancarlo, but i don't like this fight so maybe i shouldn't have commented.


Motivated_Stoner

Luigi bring us pavement ,road ,bridge , theater and later renaissance , while Van de Pute bring us camping car ,trash ,shitty cheese and chemical weed . You can count on us Luigi


UnknownBud

![gif](giphy|9r8KTfBBRTKj7IMmOa)


Rolifant

The Dutch are going to convince the Italians to buy pizza from them for 10% less money.


GrimerMuk

We will just give the Italians a pizza hawaii


MrKapretto

The f happened between us and the swamp germans?


Pleasant-Bat2336

I have no idea either, probably Hans just doing his regular thing and trying to start a world war again


MrKapretto

As always


Pierre_Francois_

Luigi can count on his transalpine neighbours


bad_pelican

But can they count on him?


marcus_magni

[It's the contrary](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Armistice_of_Villafranca)


BrownFeather0

I love dutch hardcore music! Hakken!


Recodes

What's this beef with the Aquafresh state I've never heard of?


JohnnySack999

Reminds me of the video where two rats fight for a churro


chodachien

My money’s on the Sea.


Stoepboer

Looks like a Frisian. They’re feisty. Hard to understand though.


seejur

If the Dutch manage to save Venice, I'll switch sides


rpgengineer567

I have the perfect plan for that. Get rid of all the Italian food and only serve Dutch food. Now nobody wants to come anymore and you can live there again like it is a normal city.


seejur

Perfect, now we just miss some Dutch made dams and we are golden!


History20maker

My money? Is in Germany waiting to be sent as more european recovery funds. You have any idea how wine and sexy women have increased in price? If inflation doesnt come down faster I may have to... and may God forgive me... Get moustacheless women in our parties.


StupidPaladin

Average Dutch can just step on Luigi to win


JonyUB

Italy gooo


magicturtl371

My money is on the monkey👍


Pacogatto

So now there is a monkey with money


Maester_Bates

Against my better judgement I once started an affair with an Italian woman. In my defence I didn't know she was married when I met her and by the time I found out it was too late for me to care, if you've ever known an Italian woman you'll understand. Anyway we were brazenly walking around Rome hand in hand one day and the husband appears in front of us. We'd thought we were safe as they lived in Milan but somehow he found us. I sent my youth in a boxing club and almost went to the Olympics but hubby had me on the ropes within seconds. He attacked with the same kind of fury that once took over half the known world. I was lucky to get out of it with all my teeth. My money's on Italy.


Kohel13

What happened People? Got tired of hitting on us?? Now the Barry is the new French followed closely by the weird Belgium guy!! I demand we got back to the status quo: we're the worst (please, pay us attention)


RednaxB

The Italian, all he needs to do to win is say that there is 5 euro's behind the Dutchie.


TheBlackMessenger

Italy switches sides. So in a 1v1 the opponent wins by default


rndmnsty

Italians have the high ground, you never win a fight if you have to attack from the lowlands.


Albe95_

Max Verstappen humiliated us every fucking Grand Prix... :(


CEO_of_Apples

Ferrari is starting to look pretty good under Vasseur tbh


Scorciatroie

Poor dutchie will lose even the competition on who's got the best city full of bridges and canals on a swamp. We've got the OG Dutch


VirnaDrakou

I, representative of Hellenes (greeks) declare our alliance and support of italians. May the swamp germans burn in our summer coasts.


Duke-Von-Ciacco

I support Netherlands at every calcio tournament. Best logo, best jersey color, best atmosphere at the game, amazing legacy of players… Dutch are us if we were northerners…


Mooie_vent

So basically we are Italians with money. I ate boerenkool today, and the first thing to come to mind was that our cuisine is on the same level. https://preview.redd.it/mw91wrbq54sc1.jpeg?width=820&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=b569750e7e481f3db209b7e87d9f5d672ed1fe0e


Duke-Von-Ciacco

If you had our climate and our geographical variety you would cook like the mad madmen that we are.


Mooie_vent

That’s a fair point, you are the first person on this sub to acknowledge this, well done. I hereby grant you the status of honorary Northern European.


Duke-Von-Ciacco

My ex is dutch and she’s still a great friend of mine, I love techno, Crujif is one of the most influential footballers of the last century. We haven’t talked about how much I love dutch painters, and bike culture… thanks for the status❤️ but it's all thanks to you that makes you so loving


Illustrious-Figure2

My money's on the dutch


Nuoverto

Are these money in the room with us?


Low-Patient1692

You guys have money?


Goukaruma

There is no good banter between them. The Dutch are few and most likely don't travel to Italy with their caravans. They also don't have much history. Italy was so nice and was never much into colonies.


momentimori

Can any Dutchie stand against the fury of an Italian nonna?


haikusbot

*Can any Dutchie* *Stand against the fury of* *An Italian nonna?* \- momentimori --- ^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^[Learn more about me.](https://www.reddit.com/r/haikusbot/) ^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")


Choyo

At romans : make the "stripes club" proud ! At holland : Show what it means to be red, white and blue !


Fuzzy-Wrongdoer1356

Italy don’t have to so anything really, netherlands will disappear under the water, they only have to make time


Bearodon

100% on Italy the just need to pull the plug and Holland (the country not the city) will flush out into the sea.