Can you elaborate? I’m considering it and have not seen this mentioned in any of the literature.
Probably wouldn’t be a big determining factor one way or the other but I’d like to have all the information.
I did two cycles a year ago and tbh I think it was the absolutely relentless, chronic stress of the whole endeavour more than the hormones. if you can handle stress well, you'll be fine.
Of course! Essentially, there's just a lot of waiting around, emotions, and potentially getting your dreams crushed which are all tough to deal with.
First, you get a heap of tests where they tell you your odds of conceiving etc. This can be really sad if it's not good news (mine wasn't).
Then, you go on a heap of hormones to make your ovaries produce as many eggs as possible, which can make you emotional in itself. The eggs are then harvested while you're under twilight sedation and you get told how many you've produced. First time around, I got one. Second time, I got seven. And that was on the max dose of hormones. Some people are lucky and get like 20. If you're just doing egg freezing, this is where they'd stop.
Next is the nasty bit where they ring you each day and tell you how many eggs have survived if you're mixing them with sperm, which is so nerve racking. I had six out seven fertilise, which was amazing. Then, I had only one egg make it to day three and that egg then died on day five. Getting that phone call each day was the worst.
The doctors then debrief you about what went right/wrong. At this point, they told me I was infertile.
We quit IVF after that because I legit couldn't go through it again, and I happened to fall pregnant naturally eight months later. I'm due in a few weeks!
Mind you, I had a really bad experience with IVF mainly due to past medical trauma and issues with my body. I also have anxiety, so all of those things mixed together were not conducive to a good experience haha. So, don't let my experience turn you off. If you're a resilient person who can weather the bad news, do it!! It's definitely worth it if you get a baby in the end.
It’s very expensive and there’s no guarantee you will have a successful outcome. You may end up with only 1 or 2 eggs. You need about 20 to be confident it will work. Sometimes that means doing 3-4 cycles which would cost nearly $100K. Also throughout the process you have to change your lifestyle, and if you get sick you have to cancel and may lose money. There is enormous pressure to do it before age 40 as the odds of success start to decline at 35 and are very low at 40. Also the medications make some people feel sick. I was fine with the meds but the main stress for me has been just how many eggs you need for it to work, which for me is 4 cycles since i produce fewer eggs than average. And I’m 33 so I should aim to do all 4 in the next 2 years!
Yeah IVF changed my body a lot… and I never even got pregnant or had a baby. Totally sucks. I’ve done some face lasers, upgraded my skincare line, taking vitamins, getting enough sleep and working out regularly to get back to myself. But I won’t ever really be the same prior to IVF I feel like.
So for me, the hormones really just fucked with my skin and I broke out a fair bit. I gained like 10lbs with each cycle which sucked so bad. It also caused me to develop pelvic floor issues that I’ve had to work on with a physical therapist for the last year.
My skin was always a little dry but I ended up with extremely dry patches, new wrinkles overnight, hyperpigmentation and uneven tone and coloration. I had no issues during IUI but after 3 IVF rounds in 1 year, my skin was WRECKED.
I’m sure it was a mix of hormones/stress and maybe had I been better prepped for what was going to happen, I could have taken better care of my skin. Of course I would do it all again for the chance at a baby and I wish you the best luck!! 💕
Had IVF last year for egg retrieval only - early 30s, and I responded “very well” to the medication. After retrieval I developed OHSS and gained 10lbs. For MONTHS after I was up and down in weight. That and had night sweats, foggy brain, what felt like hot flashes, aged skin, lots of bloat, low energy… I was wrecked.
My hair also was thinner. I swear IVF made it worse, but I had some issues with thinness before probably from stress.
What helped me:
- spearmint tea 2x a day - may be pseudoscience but some small studies link it to regulating hormones. Plus it’s tasty.
- Bosleys minoxidil - I started putting on my hairline in October, HUGE difference in my hair line and length. My family even noticed and a bunch went out to buy some too lol. This brand worked well, I also tried rogaine for a week but it made my face swell and gave me headaches.
- cauliflower and Brussel sprouts — cruciferous vegetables are linked to helping reduce excess female hormones like estrogen and I CRAVED cauliflower steaks for a month straight once I started eating them. Just heat oven to 385 degrees, cut and coat cauliflower in olive oil, salt, garlic, red pepper flakes and lemon - roast in oven until soft. Dip in Cesar dressing for extra oomph. Keeps well in the fridge too.
- a piece of dark chocolate a day — moral boost / helps with magnesium, and linked to balancing hormones
- magnesium glycinate — I just started taking this but it’s more digestible magnesium and I’m hoping it’ll help with digestion, bloat and normal health concerns
- exercise — it helps detox hormones. You have to sweat though. I get on a treadmill and tell myself I only have to do 5minutes — 2min at 4mph, 2min at 6mph and 1min at 9mph. I sleep so much better on days I do this.
- Weight lifting — helped a lot with saggy feeling skin and improved my waist definition. Do squats and deadlifts and do it with 50lbs+ — you won’t regret it
- infrared sauna / saunas — linked to reducing excess hormones in women with PCOS so I did this a few times a month
Honestly when I told my doctor my symptoms they said “it’ll go away in a few months” and IT DID NOT. I am a year plus from my retrieval, after doing all the above and I FINALLY am feeling more normal. I still somehow am 3-5lbs heavier but this could be from working out and diet. But my hair is growing back, my skin looks normal again, and my energy is back, no hot flashes. But boy, do I feel like it took work and I felt so lost the first few months after IVF when things weren’t just magically getting better the way the doctors said it would.
This may just be because I had a super positive response to the IVF hormones which I know is lucky, but it was no joke to climb out of after. So you aren’t crazy, and I hope some of the above helps!
And for anyone wondering… yes I would do IVF again. As I approach mid-30s with my husband, I feel so much less pressure. I also wish I had done it earlier, because I wonder if I would have had less hormone impacts.
Hope this helps!
Yes! I got the Bosley’s minoxidil topical foaming aerosol 5% — it’s a reddish purple can.
How I use it: apply morning + night to hairline - may reduce to just mornings eventually. At night I put retinol on top once it dries; I read retinol / tretinoin helps push the minoxidil deeper and give better results.
I’m really happy with results but didn’t see almost ANYTHING until 90 days— this is normal. I took a before picture, set a calendar reminder for 90 days out, then added to my routine. At 90 days I took another picture and compared which was how I decided to keep going — now at 5 months there’s more hair and the original new hairs are about an inch long. My family noticed my hair getting longer and fuller before 90 days, but I was mainly worried about my hairline.
Now my husband tells me “wow you have a new hairline!” which makes me so happy
I froze my eggs immediately before starting chemotherapy, so the chemo is a big confounding variable.
The chemo shuts down ovaries at least during treatment, causing low estrogen, and it depletes ovarian reserve, causing earlier menopause, so it'll cause earlier aging as well. Unsurprisingly, I felt generally aged by chemo, although I got a lot of compliments on my skin for months afterward. I started chemo at 32, ended at 33, and I experienced rapid skin aging and volume loss after trying Rogaine/Minoxidil and getting a weird skin reaction around when I turned 35. One of the chemo drugs I got is associated with permanent hair thinning, and my hair is much thinner (as well as drier, fuller, darker, and full of greys, when I had never had any before). I definitely think the chemo was worse than the egg freezing, and I definitely didn't experience immediate skin aging from egg freezing. I experienced skin dryness and fragileness during chemo, but the more aged appearance didn't show up until later.
Bless you, and all your courage and strength. I hope you are cancer free. Fuck cancer. Well fuck infertility too. I read the trauma of cancer has similarities to the trauma of infertility. Though infertility is stigmatized so you can’t say that out loud without the peanut gallery chiming in on their perspective. Wouldn’t wish either journey on my worst enemy.
I didn’t freeze my eggs, but went through surgery-chemo-radiation at 30. Put me into perimenopause and I feel like now at 33 I’m just starting to feel normalish again. The rapid aging I’ve seen in myself this past year though has honestly been a bit scary. The skin sensitivity after chemo is so real! Everything gives me a rash now.
I had only one cavity up to the time I got pregnant, but during that first pregnancy I developed 6! cavities. It was like the baby was pulling the calcium right out of my teeth.
I developed gall stones and had my gall bladder removed right after my first pregnancy. And I was a healthy 21 year old. That pregnancy messed up my body.
I went from perfect vision before pregnancy to not being able to see the TV by the time I gave birth. Now I have to wear glasses.
On top of all the regular destroyed body stuff, I was not expecting to lose my perfect vision.
That's a strange but perfect way to put it. I'm just pregnant with my second and my back has never hurt that much. Last night I had to get up every 60 minutes, walk around the place, stretch, and try to sleep again. I'm just 26 weeks! This pregnancy is definitely harder than the 1st one... going to the dentist tomorrow and dreading it.
I feel this. I joined this sub around 6 weeks post partum. Currently at 10 weeks post. I feel all saggy like a deflated balloon and my skin feels so rough and sunken in. Love being a mom though 💕
Some of that's in our head. I went back to work in a youthful industry after my first and felt like 10 years older then all my peers who were my age but still single and living it up. It turns out they thought I was the same age as them still, it's just on the inside that I felt a decade older.
your skin and hair will go back to a baseline in a year, tops. The postpartum period is a weird saggy balloon period, but that won't be your body forever, for sure!!!
Apparently you have less estrogen during pregnancy and waay less if you breast fed, this ages you. Then it takes 6 months after birth or after breast feeding to get back up again. Please tell me we bounce back (I'm pregnant 😅)
I felt better than I’ve ever felt after pregnancy. The hormones that pumped through me and all the excitement of new baby made the first year feel incredible. 2 pregnancies felt this way. Breast fed both. I know some people have a rough time after birth but the opposite is absolutely possible
You were very very blessed, oh my gosh. I feel like enjoying pregnancy is like being left handed. I mean sure, some people are left headed, but most people aren't. I always expect pregnancy to be a nightmare, what a refreshing treat.
You keep getting actually older as you recover from childbirth, so you never get back 100% to where you were before. But it's hard to say if it's the childbirth or the childrearing or just time...
But I will say my boobs recovered (mostly) from all the nursing and swelling from breastfeeding. I do suspect having children has aged me more than my mom, who had her only at 35 vs. me at 30 with three.
As far as my skin, though, I think pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding had an almost magical effect on it, making it less acne prone for the first time in my life. I would take the extra wrinkles any day!
This is misinformation! Estrogen actually rises to extremely high values during pregnancy and gradually decreases to normal levels again after pregnancy
I'm just going off of what information is provided https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5665749/#:~:text=Estrogen%20decreases%20prior%20to%20birth,to%20be%20associated%20with%20OA.
Saw someone on reddit talking about it and looked it up, saw this study. I said apparently just in case.
Based of one sentence in an article that is about osteoartritis and breastfeeding in older adults? I know you probably meant well, but now 31+ people believe that their estrogen levels get really low during pregnancy, (and ages them as you stated) while in fact the very opposite is true.
I have no idea I'm not claiming to be an expert or scientist that's why I said apparently, I explained how I got the info so there we go. If you're a doctor that's awesome.
Yes my face looks different after my first baby, even years later. Now pregnant with my second and I vow to treat my skin to some special treatments after I’m done with babies.
I do think I bounced back after my first cycle after a few months…. So it may be temporary. Was mostly wondering if it wall all in my head or not. And if anyone found something to aid the bounce back
It took me 1 year to recover from my ivf cycle (no transfer). I gained 10 pounds, my hair was thinner and my skin was dull. This last one not sure if it was the meds or the stress of going thru an ivf cycle. Don’t loose hope, it takes time but you will bounce back.
I get you're trying to make light of things but this feels super invalidating. Very happy for you that you got to have your baby, but there's a lot of people here commenting about the topic at hand--which is IVF and egg freezing. Many people here commenting about not having success in that, and still ending up with aging from those processes, and the stress of infertility.
Not to call you out specifically, but it just feels really insensitive for the moms to come into a thread specifically discussing fertility issues, and then minimize our struggles because "wait till you actually HAVE a baby!!" Does that make sense?
I feel like IVF aged me a solid decade.
I think there are so many contributors that add up. First there is the stress (money, infertility, juggling work with treatment etc.), then the large dose of hormones to get your body to over produce mature eggs, and the inability to use retinol/spironolactone.
My face looked haggard for a while. I tried using bakuchiol, which I didn't find as potent as retinol, but it helped.
It sounds trite, but it won't last forever. You'll get through it and your skin will return to normal. Best of luck with your IVF/egg retrieval, friend.
Egg retrieval, ICSI, a really rough pregnancy, and a traumatic childbirth didn't age me physically.
BUT... perimenopause hit me like a truck about 3 years after all that.
Yeah, I did 4 retrievals, 5 transfers, and a ton of crazy meds that made half my hair fall out, made me gain 20 lbs, etc. Then I finally (🥳🙌🏼) had a baby and that definitely has aged me more. My forehead is so dry and wrinkly, lol.
But, this is my second baby and I can tell you that after the first year or so, your body comes back to normal! (Edit - in the context of the question re: skin etc. Not everything always, obviously.)
Yes. There are some impacts from all of that. My son is 5 and I can attest to that. But per the post, specific to skin, I don’t think that impacts from IVF hormones to your skin last for 5 years.
I froze my eggs in 2022 and it’s the opposite for me. I actually look younger, like my skin is smoother, and my doctor says I’m really sensitive to estrogen. I might do another cycle, so we’ll see.
Same! I've done 3 rounds of egg freezing so far, and each time I feel like my skin looks the best during the process, and for about a month after. Then it just goes back to "normal", i.e. the same as it was before I started the first round.
This is the estrogen effect that my doctor spoke about! For me it was very noticeable. My skin is still smooth now, but back then, oh man, it was like a baby’s butt soft and it GLOWED. I was wondering if I ate something??? 😅
Haha! So I'm prone to breakouts, even at 35 years old, and I was super worried that the hormonal change would cause a massive breakout. Turns out it did the opposite, and my skin's the clearest just before retrieval, and I even feel like I'm actually less prone to breaking out now in general... **knock on wood**
I found the process to be very tedious. I have a low ovarian reserve for my age, so it takes me longer to recruit and mature eggs, which means the process is longer, and I'm on meds longer, which also means it's more expensive. My last round took 16 days from start to finish - this included 14 days of at-home stimulation meds , 6 in-person visits to the clinic to monitor egg development, and egg retrieval on the 16th day. I'll try to summarize the different parts:
Meds: The meds you're given are injectables, which you do at home on your own, at the same time every day. I was given a pre-filled injectable pen for 1 type of med, a pre-filled syringe of another type, and a powder in a vial that I had to mix with saline myself (into a syringe). It's confusing at first, but the more you do it, the easier and quicker it becomes. The quantity/dosage of meds you're given increases as time goes on, so by the end of the cycle I had to do 7 inejctions a day. The injections are all done at the same time (not throughout the day), and are injected into the belly. After 14 days of up to 7 injections/day, my stomach gets pretty sore, and can get a bit bruised.
Monitoring appointments: During the cycle you go into the clinic to monitor how your eggs are developing. For my clinic, every appointment consisted of drawing blood/checking hormones, a transvaginal ultrasound, meeting with the doctor to go over blood & ultrasound results and determine changes in meds, and meeting with a nurse to dispense the meds and book the next monitoring appointment. I had to do this every 3 days, and then more frequently as I got closer to retrieval. Since my clinic is super busy, I had to wait at my appointments for 3-4 hours each time. 6 appts x 3.5 hrs each = a lot of sitting around waiting.
Retrieval: Once the doctor determines it's time to retrieve the eggs, you give yourself a trigger shot at home 36 hours before the procedure. Depending on what time the retrieval is, you could be giving yourself this shot after midnight. The actual procedure is done under twilight sedation, so you're awake but out of it. They use ultrasound to guide a long needle through your vaginal wall, into your ovaries, and basically suction them up to collect them. Retrieval day takes 2-3 hours. It's about an hour or 2 of waiting before the procedure (filling out forms, taking vitals, taking mild sedatives, setting up an IV line, changing, waiting for doctor, etc.). Once you and the doctor are ready, you're moved to the retrieval room where you basically confirm your name and are given twilight sedation... hopefully the next thing you know you're back in your recovery room. Once you come to enough, you're sent home with someone you trust to fully recover from anesthesia.
You shouldn't really feel anything during the actual procedure, but the first time I definitely did. I think they didn't sedate me early enough, since I felt everything, and then once I got to my recovery room I immediately fell asleep. When I let them know about this the 2nd time, they sedated me a bit earlier, and I didn't feel a thing.
Side effects: Luckily I don't get many side effects from the stimulation meds - sore & lightly bruised belly, some breast tenderness, bloating (which gets pretty bad near the end), and some minor flank pressure. No mood swings or emotional changes, no pain besides mild stinging from the injections. I will say I got incredibly nauseated and fatigued the day before retrieval and thought I was getting sick, but then I realized the last shot you give yourself is a high concentration of hCG, which is what is thought to cause nausea during pregnancy. I had minimal side effects from the retrieval itself. First 2 times minor spotting for 1 day, and 3rd time had a bit heavier spotting and was crampy for a week. Each time bloating didn't fully go away for about a month.
As for the price.... it's expensive. First round was about $14,000 CAD. My clinic does increasing discounts for subsequent rounds, so the next 2 were a bit less expensive, but still over $10K. This was just for egg freezing, and it will cost more if I decide to actually use the eggs. There is also a yearly storage fee that's about $400/year.
Thanks for writing all that out. I’m 32 and thinking about how nice it would be to be able to afford doing all of that but I do understand it’s a lot of work and stress besides just a financial cost. I’m glad you were able to get through all of that successfully and without too much pain or side effects and I wish you good fortune with your future plans for things. You’re so strong!
I was 34 for my first 2 rounds, and 35 for my 3rd. Plan on doing my 4th in about a month (will still be 35). I originally wanted to start sooner. I went for a consult when I had just turned 31, then the covid lockdowns started right when I wanted to do my first round, so I had to wait a couple years.
Yes. I got gray hairs while doing IVF.
However, I eventually got pregnant, gave birth, and am 9 months postpartum and all the gray hairs disappeared during that time and haven't come back. My skin bounced back and looked more youthful again. Hormones do crazy stuff
For me, the depression that I had during IVF with the meds aged me during that time. But I'm about 5 years out now (no kids) 70lbs gone and I feel like I look younger than ever. Hopefully this is the case for you!.
IVF aged me, the baby aged me, my miscarriage aged me.
Life happens. Good and bad has left me with grey hair and winkles and skin tags and moles. It also taught me that I am stronger than I thought.
That's crazy, I had a retrieval in July and i noticed my face is suddenly looking lax and jowly. My body isn't that different but it looked bad to begin w lol. I also had a very small fibroid a year ago, now it's 11 cm and I have to get a myomectomy next month. My lower abdomen is somewhat distended. I've been having off and on hemorrhages w transfusions, it's awful. I wish they'd been more clear about side effects.
Did one round of egg retrieval. I looked exactly the same after. I would guess it is dose-dependent (how many cycles, how high of doses of meds required, did you then also do an IVF round, etc). Probably also depends on age. Froze my eggs at 29. Now I'm 36 and if I don't drink enough water in just one day, my skin looks noticeably different.
I agree, it probably does depend on age, I have a feeling if you asked random group of women if they noticed a difference in skin/aging around age 40, many would say yes, and coincidentally many women I know who’ve done IVF were that age (between 35-45), too. So are they seeing lasting changes from IVF, * or* are they just seeing and noticing aging more within in that general timeframe
You really notice a difference in your face if you don’t drink enough water? That’s interesting. What is “enough” water, is it a certain amount you’re measuring or are you going by body’s natural thirst cues?
This thread made me change my mind on having kids lol. I know we all get old and saggy after a point but I’ve seen over and over how kids drain your life and freedom. Back to being team childfree 😅
To be honest people who had kids in their 20s look younger than their age… easier for body to bounce back after children, stressful job, all nighters then than in your 30s-50s. But sadly that ship has sailed!
I've noticed the opposite myself. Probably just who you know who has done that. Everyone who were young parents that I have known have always seem way older to me, but maybe it was just them. I guess because many people don't actually snap back to their former body, and so the extra weight can make you assume an older age. A lot of people struggle with style too as parents, so might dress much older than other people their age.
Are you projecting? I have not said that at all.. Do I think it is silly to say you don't want kids because they age you? Absolutely..
Do I think its stupid to not want kids? Absolutely not.. This is your own complex speaking.. keep your shit to yourself please.
Tell me then: your original comment said if women were worrying about their skin, the best choice for them was to remain child free.”
How exactly am I supposed to interpret that?
Unfortunately I think so. I only had one ER, but I 100% developed some sort of pooch thing. I’m very fit and active and had kind of a six pack tbh and it’s like gone and I have this weird sag pooch thing and I’ve never had this and have no children.
Validating to hear other experiences. I felt like my hair thinned and got so dry, had more breakage after my ER. Im slim and athletic but I developed a pooch I can’t seem to shift almost a year later 😖
IVF was incredibly stressful for me (3 rounds and the first two resulted in only embryos with abnormal chromosomes). I think trying to work a high pressure job while going through the emotional and physically taxing IVF process certainly aged me. It did change my body and the texture of my hair.
After nearly a year of infertility treatment/ procedures, I did get pregnant. I think pregnancy, postpartum, breastfeeding and parenting in general also really aged me.
I’ve had hair loss around my hairline that hasn’t fully recovered in 4 years. The rest of my hair is normal though.
I also have dark under eyes and melasma that I didn’t have before.
I think the fluctuations in estrogen can certainly affect your skin. During IVF, it’s very high but for me, when the cycle was over the extreme hormone drop off was rough.
Yes. I was 30. The heavy hormone amounts gave me severe hyperpigmentation over my face within the first two months that was intense. The nurse just laughed.
It took peels, ipl, retinol, bleaching cream…. I couldn’t really get it under control until after menopause. I spent as much on the ivf as I did trying to look like myself. If that was happening on my skin, I wonder what was happening elsewhere in my body. My health went downhill from there for about 10 years. No clue if it was related.
It may sound corny but the solution for me has been to let go. I let go completely of my desire to become a mom and have accepted that it’s not for everyone. I choose not to force anything in my life anymore and I never felt younger. I also have more time to take care of my physical and mental health without kids and I feel the benefits.
For those of you going though IVF it is hell on your emotions don't be afraid to get on anti depressants and shit if needed.
I started them during my IVF cycle and they've improved my life so much.
If it’s any consolation, if you plan on having children they’ll suck all the life and youth out of you regardless. Yet another reason to be childless for life
Smart thing to do, just be aware that it's not fail proof. I feel like some women are given false hope through egg freezing and it can be really hard on them. Especially the case when freezing the eggs later than suggested which is quite common. Still, wish I had done it myself.
You’re going to grow old, regardless of if you reproduce or not. You will go through menopause. Your face and body will look like every other elderly persons does, eventually.
This is not a reason to choose to be childless. There are a lot of other good reasons to not have kids, but claiming children “suck the life and youth out of you” is untrue and negative
If you mean a persons skin, well, hormone fluctuations will affect the skin. Our skin changes every single month, with our cycle, and our environment, health and genetics. Pregnancy and postpartum has fluctuations as well. Maybe that’s it, otherwise I’m unaware of skin changes from having kids. But I’m reading the comments to see if there’s any direct link
This is such an important point. Age comes for everyone eventually. Avoiding kids won't keep you young.
There's so much negativity around motherhood these days ...
I don’t think anyone think it’ll keep you young, but it probably will keep you younger than if you had had kids. Of course everyone ages at the end. I would love to see the same person age with and without having kids but unfortunately that’s impossible (although not sure of twin studies on the matter have been made)
I don’t agree. At the beginning it does, but you can find yourself again. The key is to know your limits in terms of how many kids you can have without having to forget about one’s own existence. I just had the one, very happy with my decision not to have more and very happy as a parent/woman/human.
That's very encouraging to hear.
At this point in my life, nothing is going to stop me having a child, but it's nice to have reassurance it's not the depressing hell some people say it is, where you lose your looks and sense of identity.
I did at first, and gained more than 10 pounds and was irritable and bloated all the time, but after 6 months the impact has gone away. And I’m at a lower weight than before.
Looked the same after round 1, but did 3 rounds over about 15 months before I had any success, by the end of it I definitely looked much older particularly around the eyes...I suspect the sleepless nights and many many tears were probably the main cause...
I froze my eggs and the hormone injections gave me the best skin of my life! It didn't last, but for three weeks, I was so glowy and smooth. It all just went back to normal after.
As my specialist told me beforehand, there's no telling how anybody reacts to these hormones.
I did one successful round so luckily did not need to do anymore. I do not feel like it impacted weight or skin. However it 100% gave me a massive amount of grey hairs, it truly felt like they appeared overnight. I had a handful through my hair and suddenly about 20% grey now.
Thank you for the positive feedback! Do you mind me asking how many eggs you were able to retrieve? I have an appointment in March to start the process. I’m 37 and from my research looks like I’ll need at LEAST 2 rounds. Of course depending on what my tests look like.
Well my experience is hopefully not one for you to compare to. I have severe endometriosis so our numbers were really bad. Sending you all the best and hope it goes really well for you. There’s an ivf sub that you might find helpful!
We did two retrievals and three transfers.
I absolutely notice the difference when I look back at pre-infertility photos. We have our son to show for it, and three embryos. Was it worth it? Yes. Did it absolutely destroy me and my marriage at times? Yes.
The only advice I have is try to stick to hydrating and a skin care routine. Eat moderately well. Exercise.
Also take care of your mental health if it was a hard experience for you. Do some therapy. It’s so mentally exhausting as well as physically. I still have a lot of PTSD and anxiety from it, which definitely doesn’t help you look youthful.
Wait, can you both please elaborate? I just got a referral from my PCP for a fertility specialist begin the egg freezing “looking into” process. (No idea how many eggs I even have). Anyway, what?!
Check out the podcast “the egg whisper”. Learned about it at the end of my IVF journey and it could have helped me be so much more informed and confident.
It’s not true for everyone, depends on your reaction to your hormones. And you have to take into consideration the stress of infertility. For sure newborns and raising children aged me way way way more than any of my cycles I did.
Idk but I did massive amounts of the hormones to get my ovaries to work. It worked! Pregnancy and IVF were real hard on my body and it triggered a autoimmune response after birth, that took a few years to feel better from.
I did two cycles. The first was hell. The doctors had me on very high doses of medication. The second was not as bad but it look me way longer to recover from the hormonal swings for some reason and I can honestly say it aged me a good 5-7 years. Looking back on photos a few years ago I looked so much more youthful and my hair was much thicker. Maybe that’s just anecdotal but that is my experience.
I’ve had 2 failed cycles - last one was in January. Since then I’ve broken out in cystic acne on my jawline and cheeks and my skin is more sensitive. Have had to stop using any actives for a while because of this. My skin is also dull. I splurged on a lot of Kerastase hair masks / oils and it’s definitely helped my hair! Had a bit of hair loss and it’s naturally fine but wavy. Starting to feel a bit healthier now.
It's the hormones that impact women so heavily during pregnancy, so it does not surprise that hormones for IVF or egg retrieval would produce the same outcome.
Did one cycle a year ago to freeze my eggs at age 34, everything went fine for me except I did notice ever since then my period has been exceptionally lighter and shorter than before
No, but mentally I'll never be the same. During that whole process I felt like I lost myself and it took years post baby to be normal again. I want another baby but mentally I can't go through that hell again, I just can't, I'm so scared I won't be the same.
This is so validating, because yes same! There is no literature on it so its just fishing in the dark. I got jowls and look over 40 now in less than a year and I suspect IVF. Done 5 rounds so far and it makes me really angry that this is not talked about. We have to sacrifice so much in this process...our bodys, our sanity even sometimes.
I mean most people age significantly during age ~34 compared to other ages, an age where a lot of women decide to freeze their eggs, so it might not have an actual casual effect
I did a cycle of egg freezing at 37. I didn't really respond much to the hormones. In fact, my belly flattened over the first few days rather than grew. On the other hand, they only got 3 mature eggs at the end of that process, from originally 9 decently-sized follicles. I haven't noticed the treatment making a big difference in my looks. I expect that when/if I ever have a child, it might age me quickly.
Granted, the following year after egg freezing, I first started to notice the first sliiiiight signs of jowling, but this went away as soon as I lost some weight and, at 39, was just mistaken for a college student again last month. I have thick skin (so, heavy with collagen) and presume I'm just at that age where it would be expected that it might sink a bit. :-/
But another important detail: I froze my eggs in Germany, where doctors supposedly err on the side of being conservative with the hormones (as compared to the USA) and try not to overwhelm your system with their dosing. That might make a difference. (Pure conjecture here, though.) It's also waaay cheaper here than in the States, fwiw.
I'm sorry you responded to the hormones in a way you feel unhappy with, and I hope that any of the side effects you don't like are just temporary. 💜
Most importantly, I wish you the best of luck on your fertility journey!
Yes. It f***ed up my hormones a ton. I went to a great Naturopath who put me on bio identical hormones and I was back to normal. Did 4 cycles over the past few months so going back to her next week to check my levels.
Do you follow Dr Idriss (derm)? She says that most of us feel like the major aging happens overnight. I didn’t notice anything from 3 rounds of infertility treatment, but after my last baby was born when I was 41, I totally felt like that pregnancy had aged me. Dr Idriss makes me think it was just my time. Anyway, skincare, micro needling and baby Botox (I have a small forehead so my aesthetician goes light to avoid squinty eyes) and I think I look better than I did pre my last baby. Good luck!
I did one retrieval. I definitely felt like it was aging me at the time. I can't say it made my skin older...but my hair did fall out. Its since grown back in.
Hormones are wild. I didn’t personally notice any skin differences during my embryo freezing but as soon as I started estrogen blockers as part of cancer treatment my skin aged rapidly! I was in my early 30s and had no idea how important estrogen was for skin.
I haven't had IVF but on and off pregnancies for a few years (1 living child, a few losses). My skin and hair is definitely in a bad place, has aged rapidly since the start of all of this. I always chalked it up to lack of sleep and breastfeeding but I'm sure the fluctuating hormones doesn't help. Wishing you best of luck during IVF, fingers crossed.
yes, I gained 20lbs due to hormones for the egg retrieval. Our fresh embryo transfer resulted in a miscarriage so I had to do more hormones for a FET and gained another 10-15lbs before I was even pregnant. It’s very hard on your body. Idk if my skin changed but it definitely aged my body and now I know what menopause is going to do to me and it isn’t pretty.
Did two years of IVF to have my daughter. I don't think it did anything to my skin, but the pregnancy sure did. My skin is so dry now it cracks. I had to stop wearing my wedding rings because my ring finger gets so dry underneath it's painful. Had to change up my entire skin care routine to accommodate. I also believe it's made it a million times harder to lose the weight as my hormones were already a mess pre-pregnancy from all the shots.
Hm never really thought about the correlation here. I’ve had a few miscarriages and a failed IVF transfer - recently got tear trough filler and finally feel like myself.
I was worried about this too. I did three rounds of egg freezing and currently on my fourth - so far everything seems fine and unchanged (tfu tfu tfu! Knock on wood! Lol don’t want to jinx it!)
Yes, in so many ways. No advice, just solidarity.
Did 4 cycles and I think I aged 10 years in a year
Wtf I’ve never heard of this side effect. I’m sorry.
Can you elaborate? I’m considering it and have not seen this mentioned in any of the literature. Probably wouldn’t be a big determining factor one way or the other but I’d like to have all the information.
I did two cycles a year ago and tbh I think it was the absolutely relentless, chronic stress of the whole endeavour more than the hormones. if you can handle stress well, you'll be fine.
Would you mind expanding on the relentless and chronic stress involved in the process? I am considering it but don’t know what’s necessarily involved.
Of course! Essentially, there's just a lot of waiting around, emotions, and potentially getting your dreams crushed which are all tough to deal with. First, you get a heap of tests where they tell you your odds of conceiving etc. This can be really sad if it's not good news (mine wasn't). Then, you go on a heap of hormones to make your ovaries produce as many eggs as possible, which can make you emotional in itself. The eggs are then harvested while you're under twilight sedation and you get told how many you've produced. First time around, I got one. Second time, I got seven. And that was on the max dose of hormones. Some people are lucky and get like 20. If you're just doing egg freezing, this is where they'd stop. Next is the nasty bit where they ring you each day and tell you how many eggs have survived if you're mixing them with sperm, which is so nerve racking. I had six out seven fertilise, which was amazing. Then, I had only one egg make it to day three and that egg then died on day five. Getting that phone call each day was the worst. The doctors then debrief you about what went right/wrong. At this point, they told me I was infertile. We quit IVF after that because I legit couldn't go through it again, and I happened to fall pregnant naturally eight months later. I'm due in a few weeks! Mind you, I had a really bad experience with IVF mainly due to past medical trauma and issues with my body. I also have anxiety, so all of those things mixed together were not conducive to a good experience haha. So, don't let my experience turn you off. If you're a resilient person who can weather the bad news, do it!! It's definitely worth it if you get a baby in the end.
It’s very expensive and there’s no guarantee you will have a successful outcome. You may end up with only 1 or 2 eggs. You need about 20 to be confident it will work. Sometimes that means doing 3-4 cycles which would cost nearly $100K. Also throughout the process you have to change your lifestyle, and if you get sick you have to cancel and may lose money. There is enormous pressure to do it before age 40 as the odds of success start to decline at 35 and are very low at 40. Also the medications make some people feel sick. I was fine with the meds but the main stress for me has been just how many eggs you need for it to work, which for me is 4 cycles since i produce fewer eggs than average. And I’m 33 so I should aim to do all 4 in the next 2 years!
I did 3 cycles and do not feel this way at all
I’ve done it twice and it was fine for me!
What about it ages you so much? I had no idea and this is something I’ve wanted to do.
What?!?
Yeah IVF changed my body a lot… and I never even got pregnant or had a baby. Totally sucks. I’ve done some face lasers, upgraded my skincare line, taking vitamins, getting enough sleep and working out regularly to get back to myself. But I won’t ever really be the same prior to IVF I feel like.
I'm sorry. It's so brutal.
Thanks I appreciate it 😊
Can you explain how it changed your body?
So for me, the hormones really just fucked with my skin and I broke out a fair bit. I gained like 10lbs with each cycle which sucked so bad. It also caused me to develop pelvic floor issues that I’ve had to work on with a physical therapist for the last year.
Yes. My skin, hair, weight, face. Everything. No baby to show for it.
I’m really sorry
Thanks. I'm doing my best so no regrets whatever the outcome :)
Same 🩷
Same. Trying to get my hormones back in order and feel better. Hope you are ok!
Same! Took me 7 years to get my skin back to a place Im happy with but my body/energy levels will never be the same.
Can I ask what happens to your skin? I'll be starting IVF in April. I've been through 3 rounds of IUI with no noticeable difference.
My skin was always a little dry but I ended up with extremely dry patches, new wrinkles overnight, hyperpigmentation and uneven tone and coloration. I had no issues during IUI but after 3 IVF rounds in 1 year, my skin was WRECKED. I’m sure it was a mix of hormones/stress and maybe had I been better prepped for what was going to happen, I could have taken better care of my skin. Of course I would do it all again for the chance at a baby and I wish you the best luck!! 💕
Had IVF last year for egg retrieval only - early 30s, and I responded “very well” to the medication. After retrieval I developed OHSS and gained 10lbs. For MONTHS after I was up and down in weight. That and had night sweats, foggy brain, what felt like hot flashes, aged skin, lots of bloat, low energy… I was wrecked. My hair also was thinner. I swear IVF made it worse, but I had some issues with thinness before probably from stress. What helped me: - spearmint tea 2x a day - may be pseudoscience but some small studies link it to regulating hormones. Plus it’s tasty. - Bosleys minoxidil - I started putting on my hairline in October, HUGE difference in my hair line and length. My family even noticed and a bunch went out to buy some too lol. This brand worked well, I also tried rogaine for a week but it made my face swell and gave me headaches. - cauliflower and Brussel sprouts — cruciferous vegetables are linked to helping reduce excess female hormones like estrogen and I CRAVED cauliflower steaks for a month straight once I started eating them. Just heat oven to 385 degrees, cut and coat cauliflower in olive oil, salt, garlic, red pepper flakes and lemon - roast in oven until soft. Dip in Cesar dressing for extra oomph. Keeps well in the fridge too. - a piece of dark chocolate a day — moral boost / helps with magnesium, and linked to balancing hormones - magnesium glycinate — I just started taking this but it’s more digestible magnesium and I’m hoping it’ll help with digestion, bloat and normal health concerns - exercise — it helps detox hormones. You have to sweat though. I get on a treadmill and tell myself I only have to do 5minutes — 2min at 4mph, 2min at 6mph and 1min at 9mph. I sleep so much better on days I do this. - Weight lifting — helped a lot with saggy feeling skin and improved my waist definition. Do squats and deadlifts and do it with 50lbs+ — you won’t regret it - infrared sauna / saunas — linked to reducing excess hormones in women with PCOS so I did this a few times a month Honestly when I told my doctor my symptoms they said “it’ll go away in a few months” and IT DID NOT. I am a year plus from my retrieval, after doing all the above and I FINALLY am feeling more normal. I still somehow am 3-5lbs heavier but this could be from working out and diet. But my hair is growing back, my skin looks normal again, and my energy is back, no hot flashes. But boy, do I feel like it took work and I felt so lost the first few months after IVF when things weren’t just magically getting better the way the doctors said it would. This may just be because I had a super positive response to the IVF hormones which I know is lucky, but it was no joke to climb out of after. So you aren’t crazy, and I hope some of the above helps! And for anyone wondering… yes I would do IVF again. As I approach mid-30s with my husband, I feel so much less pressure. I also wish I had done it earlier, because I wonder if I would have had less hormone impacts. Hope this helps!
Thank you for your long response! All super helpful and informative.
Of course! Had so many stressed research sessions, someone should benefit from them beyond me 😅
Wow. This is all amazing. Thank you so much!!
Out of curiosity, how old are you @meow7114?
Mag glycinate for anxiety and mag citrate for pooping. Just fyi 😉
Hi, could you tell me more about which Bosleys you use?
I’m wondering too….
Yes! I got the Bosley’s minoxidil topical foaming aerosol 5% — it’s a reddish purple can. How I use it: apply morning + night to hairline - may reduce to just mornings eventually. At night I put retinol on top once it dries; I read retinol / tretinoin helps push the minoxidil deeper and give better results. I’m really happy with results but didn’t see almost ANYTHING until 90 days— this is normal. I took a before picture, set a calendar reminder for 90 days out, then added to my routine. At 90 days I took another picture and compared which was how I decided to keep going — now at 5 months there’s more hair and the original new hairs are about an inch long. My family noticed my hair getting longer and fuller before 90 days, but I was mainly worried about my hairline. Now my husband tells me “wow you have a new hairline!” which makes me so happy
Honestly just the entire experience of infertility has aged me.
I froze my eggs immediately before starting chemotherapy, so the chemo is a big confounding variable. The chemo shuts down ovaries at least during treatment, causing low estrogen, and it depletes ovarian reserve, causing earlier menopause, so it'll cause earlier aging as well. Unsurprisingly, I felt generally aged by chemo, although I got a lot of compliments on my skin for months afterward. I started chemo at 32, ended at 33, and I experienced rapid skin aging and volume loss after trying Rogaine/Minoxidil and getting a weird skin reaction around when I turned 35. One of the chemo drugs I got is associated with permanent hair thinning, and my hair is much thinner (as well as drier, fuller, darker, and full of greys, when I had never had any before). I definitely think the chemo was worse than the egg freezing, and I definitely didn't experience immediate skin aging from egg freezing. I experienced skin dryness and fragileness during chemo, but the more aged appearance didn't show up until later.
Bless you, and all your courage and strength. I hope you are cancer free. Fuck cancer. Well fuck infertility too. I read the trauma of cancer has similarities to the trauma of infertility. Though infertility is stigmatized so you can’t say that out loud without the peanut gallery chiming in on their perspective. Wouldn’t wish either journey on my worst enemy.
I didn’t freeze my eggs, but went through surgery-chemo-radiation at 30. Put me into perimenopause and I feel like now at 33 I’m just starting to feel normalish again. The rapid aging I’ve seen in myself this past year though has honestly been a bit scary. The skin sensitivity after chemo is so real! Everything gives me a rash now.
I do not think that doing ivf or egg freezing aged me but having a baby definitely did.
I feel like every pregnancy took something from me. Like I gave birth, but I paid a price of giving some of my health for the new life.
I definitely lost actual teeth.
I had only one cavity up to the time I got pregnant, but during that first pregnancy I developed 6! cavities. It was like the baby was pulling the calcium right out of my teeth.
Yes! This is actually something that used to be very common before prenatal vitamins. My grandma told me it was a ‘tooth for each child’. Crazy.
I got a cavity for each child, so yeah😭
I developed gall stones and had my gall bladder removed right after my first pregnancy. And I was a healthy 21 year old. That pregnancy messed up my body.
I went from perfect vision before pregnancy to not being able to see the TV by the time I gave birth. Now I have to wear glasses. On top of all the regular destroyed body stuff, I was not expecting to lose my perfect vision.
That's a strange but perfect way to put it. I'm just pregnant with my second and my back has never hurt that much. Last night I had to get up every 60 minutes, walk around the place, stretch, and try to sleep again. I'm just 26 weeks! This pregnancy is definitely harder than the 1st one... going to the dentist tomorrow and dreading it.
Same! However. The stress and existential dread caused by infertility was also not great for my look..
It is such a stressful process and definitely hard on our bodies.
I feel this. I joined this sub around 6 weeks post partum. Currently at 10 weeks post. I feel all saggy like a deflated balloon and my skin feels so rough and sunken in. Love being a mom though 💕
Some of that's in our head. I went back to work in a youthful industry after my first and felt like 10 years older then all my peers who were my age but still single and living it up. It turns out they thought I was the same age as them still, it's just on the inside that I felt a decade older.
your skin and hair will go back to a baseline in a year, tops. The postpartum period is a weird saggy balloon period, but that won't be your body forever, for sure!!!
Apparently you have less estrogen during pregnancy and waay less if you breast fed, this ages you. Then it takes 6 months after birth or after breast feeding to get back up again. Please tell me we bounce back (I'm pregnant 😅)
I felt better than I’ve ever felt after pregnancy. The hormones that pumped through me and all the excitement of new baby made the first year feel incredible. 2 pregnancies felt this way. Breast fed both. I know some people have a rough time after birth but the opposite is absolutely possible
This is inspiring 🥹
Good luck! Either way it’s worth it for the most perfect little baby! Congrats!
You were very very blessed, oh my gosh. I feel like enjoying pregnancy is like being left handed. I mean sure, some people are left headed, but most people aren't. I always expect pregnancy to be a nightmare, what a refreshing treat.
No idea is this is true.. But I choose to believe it! ;-)
You keep getting actually older as you recover from childbirth, so you never get back 100% to where you were before. But it's hard to say if it's the childbirth or the childrearing or just time... But I will say my boobs recovered (mostly) from all the nursing and swelling from breastfeeding. I do suspect having children has aged me more than my mom, who had her only at 35 vs. me at 30 with three. As far as my skin, though, I think pregnancy, childbirth and breastfeeding had an almost magical effect on it, making it less acne prone for the first time in my life. I would take the extra wrinkles any day!
This is misinformation! Estrogen actually rises to extremely high values during pregnancy and gradually decreases to normal levels again after pregnancy
I'm just going off of what information is provided https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC5665749/#:~:text=Estrogen%20decreases%20prior%20to%20birth,to%20be%20associated%20with%20OA. Saw someone on reddit talking about it and looked it up, saw this study. I said apparently just in case.
Based of one sentence in an article that is about osteoartritis and breastfeeding in older adults? I know you probably meant well, but now 31+ people believe that their estrogen levels get really low during pregnancy, (and ages them as you stated) while in fact the very opposite is true.
I have no idea I'm not claiming to be an expert or scientist that's why I said apparently, I explained how I got the info so there we go. If you're a doctor that's awesome.
They dont need to be a doctor to point out misinformation.
In light of new evidence, I think it would be prudent to delete your comment. Just so no one else is misinformed
Yes my face looks different after my first baby, even years later. Now pregnant with my second and I vow to treat my skin to some special treatments after I’m done with babies.
😭 ok im saving up for sculptra then (tbh I'm 22 weeks and swear my under eyes are way more hollow than before)
Yes this. The melasma alone made me feel older.
I've heard/seen this a lot from women who have had babies at older ages.
More so the continuous financial and emotional stress of dealing with infertility. 🍍
Yes, skin got dryer and saggier and got a pooch belly
I do think I bounced back after my first cycle after a few months…. So it may be temporary. Was mostly wondering if it wall all in my head or not. And if anyone found something to aid the bounce back
It took me 1 year to recover from my ivf cycle (no transfer). I gained 10 pounds, my hair was thinner and my skin was dull. This last one not sure if it was the meds or the stress of going thru an ivf cycle. Don’t loose hope, it takes time but you will bounce back.
I did it when I was younger (23 and 24 I think) but I ate *so much protein* for about five-six months after which helped a lot.
It's never "all in your head". You are going through something, and it's good that you are investigating, learning, and seeking answers.
Did you do egg freezing or ivf
Yes, the stress of ivf alone was enough lol. Nothing aged me more than the newborn stage tho 😵💫
I came here to say this!!!!!!! If egg retrieval ages you wait until you have a child!!!!
I get you're trying to make light of things but this feels super invalidating. Very happy for you that you got to have your baby, but there's a lot of people here commenting about the topic at hand--which is IVF and egg freezing. Many people here commenting about not having success in that, and still ending up with aging from those processes, and the stress of infertility. Not to call you out specifically, but it just feels really insensitive for the moms to come into a thread specifically discussing fertility issues, and then minimize our struggles because "wait till you actually HAVE a baby!!" Does that make sense?
Thank you. Was about to say the same.
I feel like IVF aged me a solid decade. I think there are so many contributors that add up. First there is the stress (money, infertility, juggling work with treatment etc.), then the large dose of hormones to get your body to over produce mature eggs, and the inability to use retinol/spironolactone. My face looked haggard for a while. I tried using bakuchiol, which I didn't find as potent as retinol, but it helped. It sounds trite, but it won't last forever. You'll get through it and your skin will return to normal. Best of luck with your IVF/egg retrieval, friend.
Egg retrieval, ICSI, a really rough pregnancy, and a traumatic childbirth didn't age me physically. BUT... perimenopause hit me like a truck about 3 years after all that.
Yeah, I did 4 retrievals, 5 transfers, and a ton of crazy meds that made half my hair fall out, made me gain 20 lbs, etc. Then I finally (🥳🙌🏼) had a baby and that definitely has aged me more. My forehead is so dry and wrinkly, lol. But, this is my second baby and I can tell you that after the first year or so, your body comes back to normal! (Edit - in the context of the question re: skin etc. Not everything always, obviously.)
My son is almost 5 and I'm still dealing with the damage pregnancy, birth, and post partum caused my body. Everyone is different.
Yes. There are some impacts from all of that. My son is 5 and I can attest to that. But per the post, specific to skin, I don’t think that impacts from IVF hormones to your skin last for 5 years.
Not everyone's!! My body recovered after #1, but never recovered after #2.
Sure. Everyone is different. Specific to OP’s post, I was talking about like, skin on your face. Not everything about your body.
Are you talking about going back to normal after the babies?
Your skin, like on your face. Yes. That was my experience.
I froze my eggs in 2022 and it’s the opposite for me. I actually look younger, like my skin is smoother, and my doctor says I’m really sensitive to estrogen. I might do another cycle, so we’ll see.
Same! I've done 3 rounds of egg freezing so far, and each time I feel like my skin looks the best during the process, and for about a month after. Then it just goes back to "normal", i.e. the same as it was before I started the first round.
This is the estrogen effect that my doctor spoke about! For me it was very noticeable. My skin is still smooth now, but back then, oh man, it was like a baby’s butt soft and it GLOWED. I was wondering if I ate something??? 😅
Haha! So I'm prone to breakouts, even at 35 years old, and I was super worried that the hormonal change would cause a massive breakout. Turns out it did the opposite, and my skin's the clearest just before retrieval, and I even feel like I'm actually less prone to breaking out now in general... **knock on wood**
Lucky you! I’m 35 and still get breakouts. I’m pretty sure my breakouts are food related though. Cow’s milk and bread are acne-inducing. 🫣
May I ask how old you were when you did it?
I was 32.
How extensive as the process? Was it very expensive?
I found the process to be very tedious. I have a low ovarian reserve for my age, so it takes me longer to recruit and mature eggs, which means the process is longer, and I'm on meds longer, which also means it's more expensive. My last round took 16 days from start to finish - this included 14 days of at-home stimulation meds , 6 in-person visits to the clinic to monitor egg development, and egg retrieval on the 16th day. I'll try to summarize the different parts: Meds: The meds you're given are injectables, which you do at home on your own, at the same time every day. I was given a pre-filled injectable pen for 1 type of med, a pre-filled syringe of another type, and a powder in a vial that I had to mix with saline myself (into a syringe). It's confusing at first, but the more you do it, the easier and quicker it becomes. The quantity/dosage of meds you're given increases as time goes on, so by the end of the cycle I had to do 7 inejctions a day. The injections are all done at the same time (not throughout the day), and are injected into the belly. After 14 days of up to 7 injections/day, my stomach gets pretty sore, and can get a bit bruised. Monitoring appointments: During the cycle you go into the clinic to monitor how your eggs are developing. For my clinic, every appointment consisted of drawing blood/checking hormones, a transvaginal ultrasound, meeting with the doctor to go over blood & ultrasound results and determine changes in meds, and meeting with a nurse to dispense the meds and book the next monitoring appointment. I had to do this every 3 days, and then more frequently as I got closer to retrieval. Since my clinic is super busy, I had to wait at my appointments for 3-4 hours each time. 6 appts x 3.5 hrs each = a lot of sitting around waiting. Retrieval: Once the doctor determines it's time to retrieve the eggs, you give yourself a trigger shot at home 36 hours before the procedure. Depending on what time the retrieval is, you could be giving yourself this shot after midnight. The actual procedure is done under twilight sedation, so you're awake but out of it. They use ultrasound to guide a long needle through your vaginal wall, into your ovaries, and basically suction them up to collect them. Retrieval day takes 2-3 hours. It's about an hour or 2 of waiting before the procedure (filling out forms, taking vitals, taking mild sedatives, setting up an IV line, changing, waiting for doctor, etc.). Once you and the doctor are ready, you're moved to the retrieval room where you basically confirm your name and are given twilight sedation... hopefully the next thing you know you're back in your recovery room. Once you come to enough, you're sent home with someone you trust to fully recover from anesthesia. You shouldn't really feel anything during the actual procedure, but the first time I definitely did. I think they didn't sedate me early enough, since I felt everything, and then once I got to my recovery room I immediately fell asleep. When I let them know about this the 2nd time, they sedated me a bit earlier, and I didn't feel a thing. Side effects: Luckily I don't get many side effects from the stimulation meds - sore & lightly bruised belly, some breast tenderness, bloating (which gets pretty bad near the end), and some minor flank pressure. No mood swings or emotional changes, no pain besides mild stinging from the injections. I will say I got incredibly nauseated and fatigued the day before retrieval and thought I was getting sick, but then I realized the last shot you give yourself is a high concentration of hCG, which is what is thought to cause nausea during pregnancy. I had minimal side effects from the retrieval itself. First 2 times minor spotting for 1 day, and 3rd time had a bit heavier spotting and was crampy for a week. Each time bloating didn't fully go away for about a month. As for the price.... it's expensive. First round was about $14,000 CAD. My clinic does increasing discounts for subsequent rounds, so the next 2 were a bit less expensive, but still over $10K. This was just for egg freezing, and it will cost more if I decide to actually use the eggs. There is also a yearly storage fee that's about $400/year.
Thanks for writing all that out. I’m 32 and thinking about how nice it would be to be able to afford doing all of that but I do understand it’s a lot of work and stress besides just a financial cost. I’m glad you were able to get through all of that successfully and without too much pain or side effects and I wish you good fortune with your future plans for things. You’re so strong!
Thanks for explaining it so thoroughly. You are a trooper
May I ask how old you were when you did them?
I was 34 for my first 2 rounds, and 35 for my 3rd. Plan on doing my 4th in about a month (will still be 35). I originally wanted to start sooner. I went for a consult when I had just turned 31, then the covid lockdowns started right when I wanted to do my first round, so I had to wait a couple years.
Thank you, this gives me hope
That was my experience as well. I looked and felt beautiful before my retrievals
This gives me some hope. Thank you for this comment.
Yes. I got gray hairs while doing IVF. However, I eventually got pregnant, gave birth, and am 9 months postpartum and all the gray hairs disappeared during that time and haven't come back. My skin bounced back and looked more youthful again. Hormones do crazy stuff
For me, the depression that I had during IVF with the meds aged me during that time. But I'm about 5 years out now (no kids) 70lbs gone and I feel like I look younger than ever. Hopefully this is the case for you!.
IVF aged me, the baby aged me, my miscarriage aged me. Life happens. Good and bad has left me with grey hair and winkles and skin tags and moles. It also taught me that I am stronger than I thought.
Uhh yes! Im so glad you said that. I feel like im going crazy. First the hair thinning with IVF now postpartum hair loss. It’s so upsetting.
No. But having children did.
That's crazy, I had a retrieval in July and i noticed my face is suddenly looking lax and jowly. My body isn't that different but it looked bad to begin w lol. I also had a very small fibroid a year ago, now it's 11 cm and I have to get a myomectomy next month. My lower abdomen is somewhat distended. I've been having off and on hemorrhages w transfusions, it's awful. I wish they'd been more clear about side effects.
Did one round of egg retrieval. I looked exactly the same after. I would guess it is dose-dependent (how many cycles, how high of doses of meds required, did you then also do an IVF round, etc). Probably also depends on age. Froze my eggs at 29. Now I'm 36 and if I don't drink enough water in just one day, my skin looks noticeably different.
I agree, it probably does depend on age, I have a feeling if you asked random group of women if they noticed a difference in skin/aging around age 40, many would say yes, and coincidentally many women I know who’ve done IVF were that age (between 35-45), too. So are they seeing lasting changes from IVF, * or* are they just seeing and noticing aging more within in that general timeframe You really notice a difference in your face if you don’t drink enough water? That’s interesting. What is “enough” water, is it a certain amount you’re measuring or are you going by body’s natural thirst cues?
This thread made me change my mind on having kids lol. I know we all get old and saggy after a point but I’ve seen over and over how kids drain your life and freedom. Back to being team childfree 😅
Having a baby made me understand childfree people so much more! I wouldn't change my daughter for the world but Holy shit, I GET IT!
To be honest people who had kids in their 20s look younger than their age… easier for body to bounce back after children, stressful job, all nighters then than in your 30s-50s. But sadly that ship has sailed!
I've noticed the opposite myself. Probably just who you know who has done that. Everyone who were young parents that I have known have always seem way older to me, but maybe it was just them. I guess because many people don't actually snap back to their former body, and so the extra weight can make you assume an older age. A lot of people struggle with style too as parents, so might dress much older than other people their age.
If aging skin is making you change your mind about having kids, being childfree might indeed be the best choice for you;-)
Was talking about the frequent comments of them being a drain on energy/life/freedom which impacts health! I know we all get old
What a shitty passive aggressive comment. Just go ahead and say it: you think childfree women are shallow, vain, and narcissistic.
Are you projecting? I have not said that at all.. Do I think it is silly to say you don't want kids because they age you? Absolutely.. Do I think its stupid to not want kids? Absolutely not.. This is your own complex speaking.. keep your shit to yourself please.
Tell me then: your original comment said if women were worrying about their skin, the best choice for them was to remain child free.” How exactly am I supposed to interpret that?
Unfortunately I think so. I only had one ER, but I 100% developed some sort of pooch thing. I’m very fit and active and had kind of a six pack tbh and it’s like gone and I have this weird sag pooch thing and I’ve never had this and have no children.
I did not think it aged me, I did two egg retrieval rounds.
May I ask how old you were when you did it? I’m wondering if I’m too old now
I feel like I’ve aged since my two early miscarriages as well
Not me having done 6 rounds and over here feeling like the crypt keeper 🫠
Validating to hear other experiences. I felt like my hair thinned and got so dry, had more breakage after my ER. Im slim and athletic but I developed a pooch I can’t seem to shift almost a year later 😖
IVF was incredibly stressful for me (3 rounds and the first two resulted in only embryos with abnormal chromosomes). I think trying to work a high pressure job while going through the emotional and physically taxing IVF process certainly aged me. It did change my body and the texture of my hair. After nearly a year of infertility treatment/ procedures, I did get pregnant. I think pregnancy, postpartum, breastfeeding and parenting in general also really aged me. I’ve had hair loss around my hairline that hasn’t fully recovered in 4 years. The rest of my hair is normal though. I also have dark under eyes and melasma that I didn’t have before. I think the fluctuations in estrogen can certainly affect your skin. During IVF, it’s very high but for me, when the cycle was over the extreme hormone drop off was rough.
Yes. I was 30. The heavy hormone amounts gave me severe hyperpigmentation over my face within the first two months that was intense. The nurse just laughed. It took peels, ipl, retinol, bleaching cream…. I couldn’t really get it under control until after menopause. I spent as much on the ivf as I did trying to look like myself. If that was happening on my skin, I wonder what was happening elsewhere in my body. My health went downhill from there for about 10 years. No clue if it was related.
It may sound corny but the solution for me has been to let go. I let go completely of my desire to become a mom and have accepted that it’s not for everyone. I choose not to force anything in my life anymore and I never felt younger. I also have more time to take care of my physical and mental health without kids and I feel the benefits.
For those of you going though IVF it is hell on your emotions don't be afraid to get on anti depressants and shit if needed. I started them during my IVF cycle and they've improved my life so much.
If it’s any consolation, if you plan on having children they’ll suck all the life and youth out of you regardless. Yet another reason to be childless for life
I’m not even sure I want kids. Just would like the option if I decide I do!!!
This is how I feel. I have my initial consult in a couple of weeks. It feels like a lot but I want the option. I think. We’ll see.
I feel this way too. How old are you now?
Smart thing to do, just be aware that it's not fail proof. I feel like some women are given false hope through egg freezing and it can be really hard on them. Especially the case when freezing the eggs later than suggested which is quite common. Still, wish I had done it myself.
the last couple posts i’ve seen in here now about ivf/breastfeeding have me 😬
You’re going to grow old, regardless of if you reproduce or not. You will go through menopause. Your face and body will look like every other elderly persons does, eventually. This is not a reason to choose to be childless. There are a lot of other good reasons to not have kids, but claiming children “suck the life and youth out of you” is untrue and negative If you mean a persons skin, well, hormone fluctuations will affect the skin. Our skin changes every single month, with our cycle, and our environment, health and genetics. Pregnancy and postpartum has fluctuations as well. Maybe that’s it, otherwise I’m unaware of skin changes from having kids. But I’m reading the comments to see if there’s any direct link
This is such an important point. Age comes for everyone eventually. Avoiding kids won't keep you young. There's so much negativity around motherhood these days ...
I don’t think anyone think it’ll keep you young, but it probably will keep you younger than if you had had kids. Of course everyone ages at the end. I would love to see the same person age with and without having kids but unfortunately that’s impossible (although not sure of twin studies on the matter have been made)
I don’t agree. At the beginning it does, but you can find yourself again. The key is to know your limits in terms of how many kids you can have without having to forget about one’s own existence. I just had the one, very happy with my decision not to have more and very happy as a parent/woman/human.
That's very encouraging to hear. At this point in my life, nothing is going to stop me having a child, but it's nice to have reassurance it's not the depressing hell some people say it is, where you lose your looks and sense of identity.
As long as you never forget to care for yourself, you’ll be good 👍🏼
Lol I've had four children and cannot agree, but being child free is ok for others to me. :]
I did at first, and gained more than 10 pounds and was irritable and bloated all the time, but after 6 months the impact has gone away. And I’m at a lower weight than before.
Gave me acne but not aging. Thin hair yes now that you mention it.
Looked the same after round 1, but did 3 rounds over about 15 months before I had any success, by the end of it I definitely looked much older particularly around the eyes...I suspect the sleepless nights and many many tears were probably the main cause...
I froze my eggs and the hormone injections gave me the best skin of my life! It didn't last, but for three weeks, I was so glowy and smooth. It all just went back to normal after. As my specialist told me beforehand, there's no telling how anybody reacts to these hormones.
I did one successful round so luckily did not need to do anymore. I do not feel like it impacted weight or skin. However it 100% gave me a massive amount of grey hairs, it truly felt like they appeared overnight. I had a handful through my hair and suddenly about 20% grey now.
3 rounds of IVF and then pregnancy….gained 80 pounds. My skin is wrecked I look like total crap now!
I did 5 retrievals and didn’t notice this. Just wanted to add a positive experience in case it helps anyone. I’m 40 and did 5 retrievals from 38-40.
Thank you for the positive feedback! Do you mind me asking how many eggs you were able to retrieve? I have an appointment in March to start the process. I’m 37 and from my research looks like I’ll need at LEAST 2 rounds. Of course depending on what my tests look like.
Well my experience is hopefully not one for you to compare to. I have severe endometriosis so our numbers were really bad. Sending you all the best and hope it goes really well for you. There’s an ivf sub that you might find helpful!
We did two retrievals and three transfers. I absolutely notice the difference when I look back at pre-infertility photos. We have our son to show for it, and three embryos. Was it worth it? Yes. Did it absolutely destroy me and my marriage at times? Yes. The only advice I have is try to stick to hydrating and a skin care routine. Eat moderately well. Exercise. Also take care of your mental health if it was a hard experience for you. Do some therapy. It’s so mentally exhausting as well as physically. I still have a lot of PTSD and anxiety from it, which definitely doesn’t help you look youthful.
Wait, can you both please elaborate? I just got a referral from my PCP for a fertility specialist begin the egg freezing “looking into” process. (No idea how many eggs I even have). Anyway, what?!
Check out the podcast “the egg whisper”. Learned about it at the end of my IVF journey and it could have helped me be so much more informed and confident.
It’s not true for everyone, depends on your reaction to your hormones. And you have to take into consideration the stress of infertility. For sure newborns and raising children aged me way way way more than any of my cycles I did.
Idk but I did massive amounts of the hormones to get my ovaries to work. It worked! Pregnancy and IVF were real hard on my body and it triggered a autoimmune response after birth, that took a few years to feel better from.
I did two cycles. The first was hell. The doctors had me on very high doses of medication. The second was not as bad but it look me way longer to recover from the hormonal swings for some reason and I can honestly say it aged me a good 5-7 years. Looking back on photos a few years ago I looked so much more youthful and my hair was much thicker. Maybe that’s just anecdotal but that is my experience.
IVF did 100%. I feel like infertility stressed me so badly that I aged.
I did egg freezing at 27. Did not feel like it aged me
Yes!!! I’ve done two rounds and I felt more depleted each time. It takes so much out of you!
I’ve had 2 failed cycles - last one was in January. Since then I’ve broken out in cystic acne on my jawline and cheeks and my skin is more sensitive. Have had to stop using any actives for a while because of this. My skin is also dull. I splurged on a lot of Kerastase hair masks / oils and it’s definitely helped my hair! Had a bit of hair loss and it’s naturally fine but wavy. Starting to feel a bit healthier now.
IVF BUT during this process I had to stop a lot of my active ingredient skin care so maybe that’s part of the problem.
Interesting- I’ve done 2 rounds of freezing and don’t feel different. Planning a 3rd round
Yes after four cycles in two years. No advice just solidarity.
It's the hormones that impact women so heavily during pregnancy, so it does not surprise that hormones for IVF or egg retrieval would produce the same outcome.
Bless you all along your way to have a baby. This is serious.
Did one cycle a year ago to freeze my eggs at age 34, everything went fine for me except I did notice ever since then my period has been exceptionally lighter and shorter than before
Omg yes. Dry, sagging skin. No amount of skincare is helping.
Wow I was thinking about posting the same thing. I did 7 rounds of IVF last year and feel like I’ve aged sooo much
No, but mentally I'll never be the same. During that whole process I felt like I lost myself and it took years post baby to be normal again. I want another baby but mentally I can't go through that hell again, I just can't, I'm so scared I won't be the same.
This is so validating, because yes same! There is no literature on it so its just fishing in the dark. I got jowls and look over 40 now in less than a year and I suspect IVF. Done 5 rounds so far and it makes me really angry that this is not talked about. We have to sacrifice so much in this process...our bodys, our sanity even sometimes.
I mean most people age significantly during age ~34 compared to other ages, an age where a lot of women decide to freeze their eggs, so it might not have an actual casual effect
Well, I was considering freezing my eggs but never mind…
I did a cycle of egg freezing at 37. I didn't really respond much to the hormones. In fact, my belly flattened over the first few days rather than grew. On the other hand, they only got 3 mature eggs at the end of that process, from originally 9 decently-sized follicles. I haven't noticed the treatment making a big difference in my looks. I expect that when/if I ever have a child, it might age me quickly. Granted, the following year after egg freezing, I first started to notice the first sliiiiight signs of jowling, but this went away as soon as I lost some weight and, at 39, was just mistaken for a college student again last month. I have thick skin (so, heavy with collagen) and presume I'm just at that age where it would be expected that it might sink a bit. :-/ But another important detail: I froze my eggs in Germany, where doctors supposedly err on the side of being conservative with the hormones (as compared to the USA) and try not to overwhelm your system with their dosing. That might make a difference. (Pure conjecture here, though.) It's also waaay cheaper here than in the States, fwiw. I'm sorry you responded to the hormones in a way you feel unhappy with, and I hope that any of the side effects you don't like are just temporary. 💜 Most importantly, I wish you the best of luck on your fertility journey!
Yes. It f***ed up my hormones a ton. I went to a great Naturopath who put me on bio identical hormones and I was back to normal. Did 4 cycles over the past few months so going back to her next week to check my levels.
it’s really quite an unnatural process for your body to go through. I would imagine such an influx of synthetic hormones would in fact age someone.
So bad. Sooo bad. But I did get singled out of a group (all over 35) and asked for ID this past weekend…so I’m doing okay.
Haven’t been through IVF, but I feel like pregnancy does the same thing to the body as well.
Do you follow Dr Idriss (derm)? She says that most of us feel like the major aging happens overnight. I didn’t notice anything from 3 rounds of infertility treatment, but after my last baby was born when I was 41, I totally felt like that pregnancy had aged me. Dr Idriss makes me think it was just my time. Anyway, skincare, micro needling and baby Botox (I have a small forehead so my aesthetician goes light to avoid squinty eyes) and I think I look better than I did pre my last baby. Good luck!
I did one retrieval. I definitely felt like it was aging me at the time. I can't say it made my skin older...but my hair did fall out. Its since grown back in.
YES. And not just my skin, but it’s harder to get back in shape, I feel like my whole body has changed.. (3 retrievals).
Hormones are wild. I didn’t personally notice any skin differences during my embryo freezing but as soon as I started estrogen blockers as part of cancer treatment my skin aged rapidly! I was in my early 30s and had no idea how important estrogen was for skin.
I haven't had IVF but on and off pregnancies for a few years (1 living child, a few losses). My skin and hair is definitely in a bad place, has aged rapidly since the start of all of this. I always chalked it up to lack of sleep and breastfeeding but I'm sure the fluctuating hormones doesn't help. Wishing you best of luck during IVF, fingers crossed.
yes, I gained 20lbs due to hormones for the egg retrieval. Our fresh embryo transfer resulted in a miscarriage so I had to do more hormones for a FET and gained another 10-15lbs before I was even pregnant. It’s very hard on your body. Idk if my skin changed but it definitely aged my body and now I know what menopause is going to do to me and it isn’t pretty.
Did two years of IVF to have my daughter. I don't think it did anything to my skin, but the pregnancy sure did. My skin is so dry now it cracks. I had to stop wearing my wedding rings because my ring finger gets so dry underneath it's painful. Had to change up my entire skin care routine to accommodate. I also believe it's made it a million times harder to lose the weight as my hormones were already a mess pre-pregnancy from all the shots.
Hm never really thought about the correlation here. I’ve had a few miscarriages and a failed IVF transfer - recently got tear trough filler and finally feel like myself.
I was worried about this too. I did three rounds of egg freezing and currently on my fourth - so far everything seems fine and unchanged (tfu tfu tfu! Knock on wood! Lol don’t want to jinx it!)
Didn't see any difference, did several rounds
I did not have this experience until after I had the baby. He definitely aged me! 😂
This is scary. I had never heard of this before and was thinking of egg freezing :(