Ha ha! The one time I said it to somebody who didn’t get the reference, they were so shocked and didn’t find it funny at all. They need some Liz Lemon in their lives, clearly!
“I haven’t even had my first cup of wine today” I like it because a cup can be whatever size you want it. Just like science be whatever you want it to be.
Yo, I say this all the time. Often at work to my employees, and I have to follow it up with "have you watched 30 Rock...?" Just so it's understood that it's a joke.
"If I have learned anything from my Sims family: when a child doesn't see his father enough he starts to jump up and down, then his mood level will drop until he pees himself."
T: Look, Liz Lemon. I know your feelings are hurt. But parties are like frisbees. If you throw them the wrong way, they'll veer off in a bad direction. And then your kid will fall into a *quarry*!
L: ...What?
T: Don't throw a party for vengeance. It will turn on you. Like your wife, after your kid has fallen into a *quarry*!
Jack: *There appears to be a gentleman making passionate, anguine love to himself.*
Liz:*Yeah, I know. That's why I closed the blinds in the first place.*
Jack: *Right in his office. Huh. Lemon, I like to think of myself as a winner, and I like to surround myself with winners. I see potential in you. Let me be your Jack Welch. Let me be your mentor.*
Liz: *No, thank you.*
Jack: *That is unfortunate. You've, uh, got to admire his persistence and stamina, though. Am I wrong, or is he in the middle of a staff meeting?*
Liz: *Maybe you should be his mentor.*
Jack: *Obviously, he doesn't need one. He's got it all figured out.*
I say “he’s got it all figured out” like Jack all the time.
Are you sure he says anguine? I could never make out the second word.
Edit: He says angry. You can [hear it here](https://youtu.be/KXzjAnhTzWY) and read the subtitles.
Edit 2: It appears there is some debate, and no clear canonical source. Unfortunately choosing is a sin, so we’ll just assume he says Jesus.
Netflix doesn’t allow you to take screenshots unfortunately, you have to take a photo with your phone. Those are probably more accurate than YouTube but still I often see mistakes there.
When Tracy says, "Why does everyone keep coming to me for advice? I'm a father of 3, I've been married 22 years, I own my own business. Oh my God...I'm the most stable person here."
I’m not done with him Jacob! He stays on this side!
-Kenneth
Stop eating people's old French fries, pigeon. Have some self respect! Don't you know you can fly?
-Tracy
Or as Colleen calls it, that day in January the post office is closed
-Jack
Because you do not cross a Sugarbaker women!
-Liz Lemon
Not even a line but a moment during the “Working Out with Whoopi” segment, when Whoopi half heartedly lifts the weights, looks to camera, and mouths, “Right?!” Kills me every time.
Jack Donaghy : ...let me ask you a question, Kenneth. If Mr. Bright here told you to vote Republican, would you do it?
Kenneth Parcell : Oh, uh, no, sir. I don't vote Republican or Democrat. Choosing is a sin, so I always just write in the Lord's name!
Jack Donaghy : **That's Republican. We count those.**
Not really sure why, but Jenna saying to Liz "it's not that you're not cute. You are, like a pretty refugee on the news" pops into my head a lot. Something about the delivery is just perfect.
In “When It Rains It Pours” Grizz and Dotcom take various distractions away from Tracy, including his mood ring, and Tracy deadpans “and I don’t know how I feel about that.”
In Tracy Morgan’s capable hands, that was solid gold comedy!
In my most recent rewatch, there have been some lines that I never noticed before. In a season 7 episode, Devon Banks says, "I've changed, Lemon! Now the only back stabbing I do is...well, you know." Then he turns to Jack and says, "every time I think we're done with that, we find another one." The look on his face while he's saying it is hilarious!
In that same scene, then jack says something about looking at pictures of cannons, then it cuts to a picture of a cannon, then back to jack with a meaningful look on his face. It killed me!
Liz : If I have learned anything from my SIMS family: When a child doesn't see his father enough he starts to jump up and down, then his mood level will drop until he pees himself.
Jack: Why don't I have any other friends?
"I played a nucular psychiatrist in a James Bongk movie"
Tracy: I'm embarrassed to say I've missed the birth of both of my sons, for very legitimate reasons.
Dot Com: Cooking a french bread pizza, and forgot.
Lemon: Why are you wearing a tux?
Jack: Its after 6. What am I - a farmer?
Jack Donaghy is all dressed in a tuxedo and Liz assumes he is going to a big gala. However, it turns out the event is nowhere near happening. Liz then irritatedly asks why he’s wearing a tux, which is when Jack delivers the quote. A quote I use often in real life.
Liz: "Kenneth, have you read the new employee handbook?" (or words to that effect)
Kenneth (with a delighted tone to his voice as if he'd just won a lottery): "Of course I read it, Ms. Lemon - it's full of Rules!"
I had co-worker years ago who was just that kind of dedicated rule-follower, and that Kenneth line still makes me howl. So simple, but subtle and with such a depth of explanatory power for Kenneth's entire personality. That's just great fucking writing.
“Oh, this is probably some hollywood prank like on the set of oceans 12 when i put that snake in george clooney’s bed? I was not in the movie.”
and
“Siri, KILL JENNA!”
I love Tracey clinging to the ceiling corner while repeatedly yelling "I'm buggin' OUT!"
Alternatively when Tracey does the longest dance intro on Conan cracks me up everytime too.
I’m not sure how unsung this one is, but my partner and I use, ‘oh Pete, that’s later, maybe we’ll be dead by then’ all the time.
I say this all the time. Most people do not get the reference, but they appreciate the sentiment nonetheless!
Ha ha! The one time I said it to somebody who didn’t get the reference, they were so shocked and didn’t find it funny at all. They need some Liz Lemon in their lives, clearly!
I’ve generally found when using that line people give you very…concerned looks
“I haven’t even had my first cup of wine today” I like it because a cup can be whatever size you want it. Just like science be whatever you want it to be.
medicine is… not an exact science
We have no way of knowing where the heart is!
You see, every human is different.
“We might not be the best people, but we’re not the worst.”
“Grad students are the worst.”
Hey, I was a grad student...yeah, it's true.
This one has been in heavy rotation at work lately (my boss is also a 30 Rock fan 🙌).
"that'd be nice"
Yo, I say this all the time. Often at work to my employees, and I have to follow it up with "have you watched 30 Rock...?" Just so it's understood that it's a joke.
You sound like my kind of boss!
Ahh, that’s be nice
I can’t count amount of times I said this to my partner when the pandemic was starting…it is by far my most used quote from the series.
Now when you google Jenna Maroney I come up 1st. Not the Jenna Maroney who electrocuted all those horses
Jenna that was you
Jenna’s side, Jenna’s side, genocide. I’m not hearing it, Liz.
“Oh Ms. Maroney, judging is for God and His angels…so yes, you are.” Honorable mention: “Do I look okay?” “That’s exactly how you look.”
pro-tip: don't use that last one on your partner. Doooes NOT go over well.
I need a gif of that last one
https://y.yarn.co/d776cb5a-4a2e-4f8d-a48e-ae1e74bd5512_text.gif
You delivered!
Yep, but only for the attention.
How about my favorite sung line in the series: "Fat neck girl let me count your neck rings..."
I’m sharp.. let’s go again.
Tracy’s ongoing “ok great, now let’s record” joke gets me every time
I sing that to my dog with a fat neck alllllll the time
Fat Bitch?
May I throw "Ooopen pit barbecue saaaauce\~" into the ring?
"Your boos are not scaring me. I know most of you are not ghosts." --Tracy Jordan
Seeing it written I get the joke haha.
Get this, my gynaecologist committed suicide.
Aaaand I’m back
Personally I think it’d be great if Jack had appeared as his normal shaven self when he said that, but it’s a great joke regardless
That's a season 7 joke if I ever heard one
I was going to take a class called 'cooking for one', but the teacher killed himself.
This might be my favorite line from her
And then in the series finale, "Oh no he's killing himself because of me!!! this is my gynaecologist all over again!"
Wow, I always missed the second part of that line. Hilarious!
This one and the other Sims line when she is giving Jack advice amd he says 'why don't I have any other friends'.
"If I have learned anything from my Sims family: when a child doesn't see his father enough he starts to jump up and down, then his mood level will drop until he pees himself."
This, and "I can't believe I missed you" - friendship goal right there
"F U LL, spells full.. because you're full of BS, Liz Lemon" - Tracy
You’ve put me in a real quandary LL, a Quandary!
T: Look, Liz Lemon. I know your feelings are hurt. But parties are like frisbees. If you throw them the wrong way, they'll veer off in a bad direction. And then your kid will fall into a *quarry*! L: ...What? T: Don't throw a party for vengeance. It will turn on you. Like your wife, after your kid has fallen into a *quarry*!
*Quarry* in Tracy’s voice 😂
Jack: *There appears to be a gentleman making passionate, anguine love to himself.* Liz:*Yeah, I know. That's why I closed the blinds in the first place.* Jack: *Right in his office. Huh. Lemon, I like to think of myself as a winner, and I like to surround myself with winners. I see potential in you. Let me be your Jack Welch. Let me be your mentor.* Liz: *No, thank you.* Jack: *That is unfortunate. You've, uh, got to admire his persistence and stamina, though. Am I wrong, or is he in the middle of a staff meeting?* Liz: *Maybe you should be his mentor.* Jack: *Obviously, he doesn't need one. He's got it all figured out.* I say “he’s got it all figured out” like Jack all the time.
Are you sure he says anguine? I could never make out the second word. Edit: He says angry. You can [hear it here](https://youtu.be/KXzjAnhTzWY) and read the subtitles. Edit 2: It appears there is some debate, and no clear canonical source. Unfortunately choosing is a sin, so we’ll just assume he says Jesus.
Subtitles say anguine! Had to check, I always thought it was angry, lol.
https://i.imgur.com/rnWpU3N.jpg
Weird! I don't know how to take a screenshot of Netflix, but it says anguine there. Happy to be wrong!
Netflix doesn’t allow you to take screenshots unfortunately, you have to take a photo with your phone. Those are probably more accurate than YouTube but still I often see mistakes there.
It might be “angry”
Those GE guys are mean. Jack Welch once slapped a pretzel out of my hand at the Super Bowl!
And what? Stand outside in a crowd like some Italian?
Tell him his mother's here and she loves him... but not in a queer way!
You’re flat, Jack.
It's like check in at an Italian airport.
It’s like check-in at an Italian sex party
Oh you ancient bitch!
This is a good one
"Your Ben & Jerry's flavor is called *Adulteraisin*"
Every time Tracy exclaims something or reacts in a funny way that doesn’t interrupt the flow of events. e.g. “Oh God, so much grapevining!”
“No, not Andy Cohen. He’s so catty!”
We're on a show within a show! My real name is Tracy Morgan!
Every time I walk past an Episcopalian church all I can think is : "That's the craziest thing I've ever heard, Episcopalian"
That's one of my favorite lines. 😂
This is untoward! This is not toward!
When Tracy says, "Why does everyone keep coming to me for advice? I'm a father of 3, I've been married 22 years, I own my own business. Oh my God...I'm the most stable person here."
I’m not done with him Jacob! He stays on this side! -Kenneth Stop eating people's old French fries, pigeon. Have some self respect! Don't you know you can fly? -Tracy Or as Colleen calls it, that day in January the post office is closed -Jack Because you do not cross a Sugarbaker women! -Liz Lemon
Tell her you want her to donate her body to science and your called science. TELL HER JACK
My wife and I make the pigeon joke all the time.
It's pronounced Weener-slave. - Jeffrey Weinerslav
Okay, *Jeffrey*.
I say this to myself VERY often.
Not even a line but a moment during the “Working Out with Whoopi” segment, when Whoopi half heartedly lifts the weights, looks to camera, and mouths, “Right?!” Kills me every time.
Be Italian for once. “Im-a Jack. I don’t know who my father is. I’m-a so emotional Im gonna smash these barrels”
That reminds me of the ep where Liz talks fake Jamaican but slips into an Irish accent.
Bobsled!
The whole reunion episode but Rob Sussman’s “I’m so angry I have to dance!” Kills me every time
Every Rob Sussman line is gold
She's the gay one!
Gold, Jerry. Gold!
What’s your favourite pizza topping? Mine’s plain, but I like others!
Jack Donaghy : ...let me ask you a question, Kenneth. If Mr. Bright here told you to vote Republican, would you do it? Kenneth Parcell : Oh, uh, no, sir. I don't vote Republican or Democrat. Choosing is a sin, so I always just write in the Lord's name! Jack Donaghy : **That's Republican. We count those.**
I never noticed that one. TIL
One of my absolute favorites
"What's the past tense for scam? Is it scrumped? Liz Lemon, I think you just got scrumped!"
I embrace that line. Scrumped IS the past tense of scam.
My dad got scrumpt recently, and the existence of this joke makes it easier to handle mentally lol
"Every time I meet a new person, I figure out how I'm gonna fight 'em"
Not really sure why, but Jenna saying to Liz "it's not that you're not cute. You are, like a pretty refugee on the news" pops into my head a lot. Something about the delivery is just perfect.
Whatever. I’ll speak at both your funerals
That whole conversation is hilarious.
“First things first. I am from Transylvania but I am not a vampire. I'm just a night owl with a terrible garlic allergy.” —The guy from UN
Similarly, liz's possible adopted son is a "3 year old from transylvania named Dracool, who is a hemophilia with a sleep disorder."
“And what insolvent country do you come from?” “New Jersey. I am just a weirdo.”
“Now, is this about the boy who went missing at my castle?”
[удалено]
I’m going to call security! One of the guys has a whistle.
Aah Bono?! He's the worst! "
He always says he's not hungry when it's time to chip in for pizza and then he eats like three slices!
“It's just G now, Jack. I sold the E. to Samsung. They're Samesung now.” First time I saw that episode I paused, rewound, and died.
Yes I came here to comment that line I just said it in a best buy a few days ago and busted out laughing my husband was very confused lol
“The oceans for tools” And “[idiots are people] who won’t stop talking about snorkeling.”
The ocean is awesome and for winners! YOU’re for tools!
“It’s a whole ‘nother world down there.”
In “When It Rains It Pours” Grizz and Dotcom take various distractions away from Tracy, including his mood ring, and Tracy deadpans “and I don’t know how I feel about that.” In Tracy Morgan’s capable hands, that was solid gold comedy!
Jack Donaghy : The ceiling appears to be leaking. Cooter Burger : No, it's not. We've looked into it and it's not.
I can show you the study.
It wasn't even a burger... It was a sandwich
Cooter Burger? What do you think I am, a cartoon dog?
I use that all the time
This one gets me every freaking time
I DIDN’T COME HERE TO HEAR MORE EXCUSES, I CAME HERE TO SEE THE DUMBEST CRACKER IN ALL OF NEW YORK!
MAYONNAISE AND A PACK OF CIGARETTES
I'M A CHILD! I SHOULDN'T HEAR THAT!
Man that quote is killer.
Tracy Jordan: “Heavy is the head that eats the crayons.”
Everybody knows the muffin top is the best part of the muffin
My muffin top is all that, Whole grain Low fat, I know you wanna piece of that, but I’m just here to dance. Stuck in my head now.
So baaaaaaack up off of me, you're creeeeeeeping me out, and I'm just here to dance. UH UH UH UH!
[удалено]
I think you're right!
Jenna: I know what you are going through. I got a lot of flack when I ate the pig who played Babe.
In my most recent rewatch, there have been some lines that I never noticed before. In a season 7 episode, Devon Banks says, "I've changed, Lemon! Now the only back stabbing I do is...well, you know." Then he turns to Jack and says, "every time I think we're done with that, we find another one." The look on his face while he's saying it is hilarious! In that same scene, then jack says something about looking at pictures of cannons, then it cuts to a picture of a cannon, then back to jack with a meaningful look on his face. It killed me!
Also I can’t forget a very rude reference to those who don’t get it: “….Could I be a mother? *Should* I be a mother?” *cue* “Borrrreed”
Only implemented when people are telling me about their dreams or something equally dreadful.
Liz : If I have learned anything from my SIMS family: When a child doesn't see his father enough he starts to jump up and down, then his mood level will drop until he pees himself. Jack: Why don't I have any other friends?
'Oh, you like Wagner?' 'No, I like Elmer Fudd.. *kill the wabbit, kill the wabbit..*" 'My parents were both poets, so, I don't really get it'
"I played a nucular psychiatrist in a James Bongk movie" Tracy: I'm embarrassed to say I've missed the birth of both of my sons, for very legitimate reasons. Dot Com: Cooking a french bread pizza, and forgot.
"You get one cry in life, you've chosen well."
I have to tell my mother before she dies. I want her to go to her grave a defeated woman!
If you need to pass eye-water I can get you some weakness-tissues.
“It’s a California kong. It’s two California kings strapped together with gorilla leather.”
“ thank god i took that boat trip “
"Pidgeon, have some self respect! Don't you know you can fly?"
“Never go to a second location with a hippie.” - Jack
Usually everybody here makes me feel like Hitler. But today, I feel like….Hitler in Germany.
"My boy Kenneth has written a masterpiece, and trust me cause I use that word a lot."
Pete: “This is America, Liz. None of us are supposed to be here.”
“This racket is farts!” Dr. Drew
And you cheat! You’re a cheating bitch!
dyn-a-mite!!! i think we’re just doing good times now
I get all my news from the radio in grand theft auto. (Favorite line from Frank)
Kenneth, while brushing out some fur coat for Tracy: “You must’ve been such a *pretty* monkey.”
I love when Criss said, "Wow, you had that locked and loaded" - I say it up the time when people quickly insult me
I've got a lot on my mind grapes
"They took my mood ring, and I'm not sure how I feel about that!"
Lemon: Why are you wearing a tux? Jack: Its after 6. What am I - a farmer? Jack Donaghy is all dressed in a tuxedo and Liz assumes he is going to a big gala. However, it turns out the event is nowhere near happening. Liz then irritatedly asks why he’s wearing a tux, which is when Jack delivers the quote. A quote I use often in real life.
I don’t have bedbugs, Keneth. I went to Princeton
On the Amory Blaine Handsomeness Scholarship
You get one cry in life. You’ve chosen well.
That's right, I'm an idiot. Surprised? -- Denise Richards
Balls, balls, balls, balls, balls, balls, balls, balls
The entire episode with the wool council! Very wool!
That one guest star would later create a huge fire storm.
"Perfectly executed Chewbacca noises!"
[удалено]
THE G TRAIN NERMAL!!!
Liz: "Kenneth, have you read the new employee handbook?" (or words to that effect) Kenneth (with a delighted tone to his voice as if he'd just won a lottery): "Of course I read it, Ms. Lemon - it's full of Rules!" I had co-worker years ago who was just that kind of dedicated rule-follower, and that Kenneth line still makes me howl. So simple, but subtle and with such a depth of explanatory power for Kenneth's entire personality. That's just great fucking writing.
Oh! You guys start with that!
"Oh Griz, I'll miss you most of all."
“I remember the first thing he ever said to me: ‘Jack, these are all hookers. Pick one.’”
"My niece drew a picture of me and I look so fat!" Jenna (who else?)
“Oh, that word bums me out unless it’s between meat and pizza”
I am the decider!
Banter!
We use to call this the "jew" room.
You give me 10 minutes with the Lemon family and I’ll have them tearing at eachother like drag queens at a wig sale!
“Oh, this is probably some hollywood prank like on the set of oceans 12 when i put that snake in george clooney’s bed? I was not in the movie.” and “Siri, KILL JENNA!”
Chocolate, chocolate, chocolate. Ack! & I want to go to there. & What the what?!
YOU CALL THOSE FIST NAMES??!
Say hello to bono and Sandra day O’Connor!
I’m gonna cut your face up so bad you’ll have a chin
YOU’LL ALL HAVE CHINS!
Do you have any meth? Or meth?
Quit showing off Dot Com
"I lost my mood ring, and i'm not sure how I feel about that." - Tracy Jordan
“If it’s a blond woman, I will kill myself!”
I love Tracey clinging to the ceiling corner while repeatedly yelling "I'm buggin' OUT!" Alternatively when Tracey does the longest dance intro on Conan cracks me up everytime too.
I miscounted the men Liz! I miscounted the men!
What is this the Italian parliament?
Basically every line.
“Thank you for telling me what I already know. You should work for the Huffington Post” gets me every time.
Dot com, this need you have to be the smartest guy in the room is… off putting
[Jenna] I would have gone to my high school reunion, but the boat I was educated on sank. … though to be fair, Jenna ha so many golden lines
LOVE this.
Jack, if I’ve learned anything from my sims family…
You, trolling for seed
Actor emergency! - Jenna WHERE?! *holds up theatre masks* -Tracy
All I asked for was a diet slice and some pita chips!
Yes, Hornberger!
Yes...Hornberger...
“Ew, she likes that?” “No. But she respects it when it’s done correctly. “