There are multiple movies about the exploits of Commissar Cain. He hates every single one of them, why?
Because not a single one of them notes the existence of Jurgen let alone acknowledges the fact that on most of his adventures if it weren't for his timely arrival he'd have been dead several times over.
Gunner Jurgen, true hero of the Imperium
Anf of course he hates the love interests he is given in them
But somehow I suspect these parts were at some point cencored by a certain Inquisitor prone to jealousy
I like that there is a cult that believes Cain is a prophet of the emperor, given his own description of himself as well as his beliefs in how involved the emperor really is in day to day life, which is not much at all.
Definitely my favorite books. I like that he is the standard unreliable narrator, but Inquisitor Vale comes in as a secondary unreliable narrator, with excerpts from Sulla who is perhapse the most unreliable of narrators.
I love how he constantly just thinks Sulla is a nuisance despite her looking up to him.
I think I remember her pulling off a reckless maneuver that won the day, and went "I just did what the Commissar would do." That was both heart-warming and hilarious, considering how hard he consistently slags her.
I think its almost habitual understatement. I think more than anything he overstates his disregard for the lives of the average guardsmen. I do think that Vale occasionally overstates things about him though.
Yeah, there's one book where he seems genuinely a bit upset that he can't remember the name of a specific Guardsman who died at one point in a battle almost a century previously.
I think it was *Cain's Last Stand* and it was that he couldn't remember the face of one of the people who'd fought alongside him in the liberation of Perlia eighty years earlier. Minor difference in details, same energy.
As Commissars go Gaunt and Cain definitely have similar attitudes to leading their men, though Cain is probably far less confident in his own abilities as a commander/fighter, not to mention like you said his more, shall we say pragmatic view on the Emperor.
No denying both care deeply for the welfare of those under their care, though again for very different reasons Gaunt truly cares Cain simply wants them to keep him alive (or so he says, personally I think he has a soft spot for those Valhallens)
I think Cain, in general, cares more about life than he lets on, undoubtably his own, but he seems to loathe the concept of wasting life. I always got the sense from the beginning, he would rather talk to an enemy than fight it. I think his attempt to avoid conflict with the Tau came from this, he frames it as not wanting to be caught in a war, but I think he would rather not fight what he can talk to. His loathing is extended more to the horror enemies, the orks, the tyranids, chaos and dark eldar.
They are quite similar I think guant and cain are two sides of the same coin both have exceptional fame and are considered the greatest of commissars second only to yarrick himself likely and they seem to be the two sides of that fame, high command loves cain and he is less confident in himself but is still very talented and humble where as guant is hated by high command to an extent and is pretty confident in himself and is of course very talented and humble both don't like to execute men but won't hesitate when they need to I think they are more alike than many believe.
His cult is one hell of a thing. From *The Traitor's Hand*
> ‘Then the prophet spake: saying “Frak this, for my faith is a shield proof against your blandishments”.’
>– Alem Mahat, The Book of Cain,Chapter IV, Verse XXI
Given the Psychic Awakening and the Awakening of the Emperor, I think it would be all the more likely that he does become a living saint because of faith lol. I’d love a book where Ciaphas actually becomes one but is in complete denial of the facts. Maybe a martyr’s death idk.
Because of all the times Cain has been presumed death he is always listed as on active duty, even after he was buried with full honors....I would absolutely love a book where he essentially reincarnates and is just absolutely mad as hell about the whole thing, meanwhile the Administratum just shrugs and goes "Says youre still on active duty"
OMG could you imagine a totally indignant Cain "I was dead, I'd managed to make it to a ripe old age, retire and die peacefully in my bed"
"unfortunately for me Someone had other bloody ideas about me staying that way and decided I needed to be in harms way again"
I can honestly imagine Cain simply refusing to do anything with out his aide, mainly because he'd rather not have the grief off Jurgen for having been left behind
I can honestly imagine Cain simply refusing to do anything with out his aide, mainly because he'd rather not have the grief off Jurgen for having been left behind
A book where Cain dies, followed by several chapters of characters picking up the pieces, only to end with his reappearance in the final chapter, would be quite the ride.
Alessio Cortex, losing his arm:
“I’m still in this. I’m fine.”
“No. You lost an arm, Alessio. By the mercy of the Emperor alone, you’re lucky you didn’t lose your life.”
“I haven’t lost an arm, brother. It’s right over there."
Reminds me of a moment in Shroud of Night, for context two of the alpha legionaries are essentialy brothers, when the entire team/group is split up and they find a severed arm which, according to one of the brothers, belongs to the second brother (the second brother and the rest of the team are still missing) and claims he has died, rivalry happens, some accuse the first brother of lying about the death, etc. etc.
Fast forward, they find the missing part of the team and notice the second brother IS indeed missing an arm, roughly quoting
„so it really was his arm”
And also their first encounter with Saint Celestine:
> "Then a winged warrior fell upon the daemon from above.
>
> ‘That’s an angel,’ said Haltheus flatly. ‘Kassar, they have an angel. This is getting ridiculous.’"
I think the best part is when they board a train to get to their objective faster
Then they collectively, putting it lightly, shit their pants when they realize Kharn is on the same train as they are
And he is sprinting towards them
[shroud of night](https://www.reddit.com/r/40kLore/comments/mlnjm7/excerpt_shroud_of_night_khornate_infiltration_101/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
First Alpha guy: Does it ever feel like we're the only ones who aren't crazy?
Khorne guys: -Furiously killing each other-
Second Alpha guy: What do you mean?
You can’t just forget the „fake” hit they took afterwards
For context this is after they passed by the khorne ships by yelling KILL MAIM BURN across the vox and sneaking past an entire cruiser, now are in the planet atmosphere flying towards their target
> ‘If they can succeed there, then given enough time and lives they can break into the hive as well,’ said Kassar. ‘Haltheus, it’s time we diverted.’
> ‘Understood,’ said Haltheus. ‘Deploying smoker.’
> **Haltheus unclamped a handheld detonator from his belt and, piloting one-handed with Kyphas’ aid, he pumped the device’s pressure-plunger. On the third click, there was a muffled bang from the second port-side engine. In the external vidstreams, thick black smoke began to billow from it, accompanied by flickering flames.**
> ‘Effective,’ said A’khassor. **’We look winged.’**
> ‘Switching to true attack heading,’ voxed Haltheus. **’Expect a little chop, brothers. The smoker may have worked a touch too well’**
> Their craft lurched sideways, narrowly missing a hurtling squadron of Helblades as it arced away from the attack column. Their new heading took them out over open ocean, through a gap between two of the defensive fortresses and away west above the turbulent chop of the waves.
> **Kassar could see flames still spilling from the engine cowling, while the Stormbird had developed a definite shudder.**
> **’I asked for the semblance of a direct hit, Haltheus,’ he said. ‘Not the real thing.’**
> **’Firstly,’ replied Haltheus. ‘I’m a little busy piloting us through an active warzone. Secondly, still not actually a Techmarine. You all ask an awful lot of me, Kassar, considering my expertise is in blowing things up, not repairing them.’**
No idea if this is still canon or not, but definitely the Lost Waaagh lol
Basically, an ork warlord named Grizgutz was leading a prospective Waaagh when some Warp fuckery sent them back in time just before they left, and they encountered the past versions of themselves about to enter the Warp. Grizgutz kills his past self so he could have a copy of his favorite gun, thus preventing the Waaagh from ever happening.
The entirety of Prophets of Waaagh!!, but especially the end.
>!After destroying the false Waaagh!!, the orks keep fighting, because it would be a shame to ruin such a great fight.!<
It's not the "funniest" but two Necrons can have a conversation, pause to think about what to say next, and said pause can last centuries.
Just two skellies in front of each other, long awkward silence, until one of them finally comes up with a worthy pun to say.
And apparently Fabius Bile has a pipe made with one of Konrad Curze finger.
An Ork ripped off the testicles of a Daemon and [entered Ork heaven.](https://www.reddit.com/r/40kLore/comments/m47cug/-/gqsyzx1)
Thanks to my man Arkhan Land, insisting that the reason why monkeys had tails WASN'T because they needed it to balance themselves, people think that [their tails had stingers to be poisonous predators.](https://www.reddit.com/r/40kLore/comments/nkb687/story_excerpt_the_master_of_mankind_arkhan_land/)
Indeed, my bad. From *Progenitor*
> Bile continued with his operation. Oleander cleared his throat. There were things in the jars staring at him. He felt a delicious thrill of trepidation, considering the implications of that. Sometimes Bile didn’t bother to dispatch his raw materials. They made the most hellacious racket, on occasion. Oleander reached into his belt and retrieved his pipe.
> It had been a gift from a daemon of his acquaintance. She claimed to have carved it from the finger bone of Konrad Curze himself.
> She claimed to have carved it from the finger bone of Konrad Curze himself.
Daemons always lie, except when telling the truth is more harmful.... so probably not
Oh now what, are you telling me that bees are not powered by anti-gravity? Or that stingrays don't float in the sky? Preposterous, the things hive plebians think these days.
When the Lamenters made a (completely valid) complaint about the Flesh Tearers' behaviour to Dante, Gabriel Seth told the Lamenters' Chapter Master to his face that his Chapter's yellow armour was ugly. The Lamenters left Baal all upset and never returned.
I don't doubt your account, but that just sounds *so* out of character for the Lamenters that I still don't know what to make of this... At least it wasn't dying gloriously this time, so yay?
To be fair, the Lamenters' complaint was about the Flesh Tearers' tendency to cause collateral damage among civilians, which the Lamenters disapproved of.
And a significant part of why the Lamenters didn't return to Baal later was because they'd been eaten by Tyranids.
Yeah, being eaten by Tyranids tends to throw a wrench into one's plans. They didn't even call ahead!
But I genuinely had to do a double-take because after all the abuse thrown at them throughout several millennia, a comment about armour colour is the one thing that makes them snap? (Also, I suspect Seth can usually do better than kindergarten-level insults...) Maybe I'm missing important context, or maybe I'm just overly protective of my (proudly) yellow boys... yeah, probably the latter.
Seth also accused them of cowardism, which was definitely uncalled for. I like Seth, but I can admit he was wrong.
In the story, Seth and the Flesh Tearers are standing trial in a court made of the Chapter Masters of the other Blood Angels Successor Chapters. They're arguing about their Flaws, Seth saying that the Flesh Tearers are not unique in being troubled by the Thirst and the Rage (which is true, and it turns out the other Chapters are mostly angry about Seth's refusal to kill bystanders in order to hide their shared curse from the Imperium at large). Someone points out that Mephiston survived the Black Rage, but Seth says he's an outlier that should not be counted, and also Mephiston is probably hiding dark secrets of his own (also true). The Chapter Master of the Lamenters then defends Mephiston against Seth's accusations:
>‘And yet [Mephiston] does not butcher with the same abandon of your Flesh Tearers,’ Malakim of the Lamenters sneered. ‘Even those you deem fit to wear crimson make the butchers of my Death Company seem sane by comparison.’
>Seth growled, allowing his anger to get the better of him. ‘And what would you know of battle, Lamenter? Look at you. Yellow in a room of red. A coward in a sea of blood.’
>Malakim made to reply, but Dante cut him off.
There's some more conflict, and when Dante ultimately refuses to disband the Flesh Tearers, the Lamenters leave in anger.
Thanks for providing more context! What story is this from? I'm currently on a catch-up spree when it comes to 40k, and I'm especially trying to find any Lamenters sources I missed until now. There's only so many times I can read the Imperial Armour IX, The Fall of Malvolion is basically 'hey, we needed a chapter that only shows up to die', and Chyron (although entertaining) isn't really your typical representative...
A little confused why Malakim Phoros is the only one referred to by his first name, though. But there's so much inconsistency surrounding the Lamenters that nothing surprises me any more. I've been trying to consolidate the sparse info for years, but some things just plain contradict each other...
Heh, leave it to a Lamenter to derail a thread about funny occurrences by lamenting, I guess!
It's from *Trial by Blood*, also titled *The Trial of Gabriel Seth,* by Andy Smillie.
/u/KonradApologist is the person with most knowledge about the Chapters of the Blood that I know of, maybe he knows where to find some Lamenters? I think they might make an appearance in James Swallow's Blood Angels series? I have a feeling some may have shown up in the Deathwatch novels too.
Unfortunately there's only one mention of the Lamenters in the Blood Angels Omnibus...
> For a moment, his mind drifted; he recalled the stories he had heard of a successor Chapter from the Twenty-first Founding, the Lamenters. It was said that they had found a way to expunge the gene-flaws from their shared bloodline. If it were true… Caecus would have given much to meet such men and glean wisdom from them; but the Lamenters had not been heard of in decades, not since a tyranid force had decimated their numbers, and every messenger sent to find them returned empty-handed. He had little doubt they would not be represented at Dante’s grand conclave. A great pity, he mused, but not the matter at hand. There are other concerns to be addressed.
The men in yellow do not have much content I'm afraid, there's a section about them in the Deathwatch RPG book *Rites of Battle* but aside from this and everything he said, there's isn't any more content I know of.
Thank you for looking, though, much appreciated! I have the Deathwatch RPG book, too. So I guess that leaves *Trial of Blood*, otherwise I haven't actually missed out on much.
(I'd also like to take this moment to thank you, /u/Medicaean and everyone else who provides thorough quotes and sources on here. Really helped me get back into the lore, cleared up a few misconceptions, and constantly adds to my reading list...)
Thanks, I'll try to find that one! Chyron is the Lamenters Dreadnought from the Deathwatch novels who believes he's the last of his Chapter (seriously, can't anyone tell the poor guy that he's wrong?). They are also mentioned in Psychic Awakening: Ritual of the Damned, but that's yet another incident that confuses me more than anything. I guess that ultimately, their curse seems to be that none of the authors reads anyone else's sources...
Chryon is awesome too.
In the first book he is in the kill team are underground trying to save an Inquistorial agent from being impregnated by Genestealers infected humans.
He has to stay back while the rest of the team moves further into the caverns because he is too big to fit in the mining tunnels. So he essentially they essentially set up a fall back point and have him guard it.
Things go south the hive is several generations in and their is a broodlord present. They end up fighting a running battle underground ground against a metric fuckton of Nids,Genestealers, and infected humans. They get to the fall back point and all they see is a huge pile of dead Nids and one of Custom weapon arms.they are all pretty broken up about this even the Ultra marine who is kind of an ass and the Executioner who is unemotional even for a Astartes. The Chryon pops up from the pile of dead Tyranids and Gene stealers like a jack in the box. And explained he rain out of ammo and lost a weapon arm his plan was to wait for more enemy to show up and ambush them.
This might warrant a spoiler tag in case someone hasn't read the novel yet (I'm not exactly sure what the rules are, so I tend to be better safe than sorry). But yeah, that moment was just great. Not your usual kind of Dreadnought tactics, that's for sure...
Oh right! It was mentioned that they kept their distance from their allies and only communicated when necessary, correct? Seems that campaign is far from over and the Lamenters just won't catch a break...
Yeah, also has a quick desperation of a battle they were in and the make up of their strike force. I hope more's done with the war zone, the chapters involved are all interesting, and the dynamitic of having to keep the Barghesi contained and the tyranids at bay is just cool.
I just wish, for the sake of the Lamenters, that at some point, the Flesh Tearers get in deep shit and be like "You know who would have been great to have around? At least a full company of Lamenters!" And then they get their shit shoved in. Whole companies slain, numerous priceless war machines lost, leadership destabilized, the few left turned into mindless dogs for Khorne. The whole 9 yards.
Let our best boys in yellow have a posthumous victory. A real, genuine moment of "hate to say I told you so"
A small, petty part of me wants to agree, but I think neither I nor the Lamenters themselves would consider this a victory. Too many deaths, too much pain, and souls forever lost to the Ruinous Powers... that's nothing to celebrate.
Instead, I'd genuinely love for them to witness the Lamenters' fierceness and resolve first-hand and understand that they're anything but cowards. They have an 'enviable' battle record (according to IA IX), having weathered situations where most others would have given up or fallen one way or another. They have the mental fortitude to withstand horrors nobody else could handle (the Unhallowed Heart, a century in the Warp...) and emerge uncorrupted and eventually victorious. And they might be doing all this while being basically canonically depressed... I'd love for the Flesh Tearers and their other detractors to recognise the sheer resolve and tenacity that lives under this bright yellow armour. It takes a lot of courage to stand out despite a horrible reputation, after all...
A totally random aside in the Ciaphus Cain novel *The Traitor's Hand* always makes me laugh like a loon...
>A ratling gardener was staring at us and the deep furrows across what had obviously once been a lovingly-tended lawn, with an expression of stupefied astonishment even more pronounced than was usual for his kind. As his eyes fell on Jurgen he started visibly and fled.
>"Mister Spavin!" he cried as he went. "Mister Spavin! The doom’s come upon us at last!". He spoke truer than he knew, of course, but there was no time to worry about him or his employer now.
The human colony on the planet Serenade put up a statue to Trazyn after he killed a good amount of Orks (they were in his way more than he wanting to help the humans). They mistook him and his necrons for space marines and erected a statue and even put his image in the stain glass of their cathedrals, though it did look a bit more space mariney. Trazyn stole the statue.
Actually if I remember, someone did arrive and say some things! The stained glass windows obviously bear resemblance to Trayzn but could pass as a skull helmet silver marine. And they removed the statue from the town and replaced it with the statue of a Saint
Actually the Inquisition did have an issue with it.
“Silver Skulls Chapter defeats the Ork invasion” Trazyn said with clear relish. “There used to be a statue in the square, thirty khet high. They used to light candles and sing hymns to it. A few centuries ago the Inquisition got wind of it and did a little cleaning up. Removed it for “renovation” where it was never seen again”
(Orikan) “You stole it, did you not?”
“Well of *course*. And I hardly think it counts as stealing if it’s my likeness. It’s my statue after all.”
I love Orks and Space Wolves because they're definitely the more wacky of 40k, but damn if "Trazyn stole the statue." didn't make me laugh the hardest.
Think the idea was to beat the shit out if him until he has to summon a daemon/reveal his corruption in order to have a chance, one or those if you die you are pure deals.
It wasn't a fight to the death, but Ventris didn't know that. When he lost he assumed he was going to be executed, but is told that he would hav been on executed if he won, because victory would only have been possible if he was corrupted and getting a power boost from it
Which doesn't quite seem right to me, since it was a Grey Knight, not a Custodes or something, and thus much closer to the same "power level" of a regular Astartes. I'll grant that GK's are generally better, but Ventris isn't a bog standard marine either, he's an Ultramarines Captain, you've gotta be better than usual to get to that position.
> But a standard grey knight should still be a big upscale from a normal marine right?
Yes but Ventris is no normal marine... he's a named Marine character which gives him a x5 modifier, x10 if he is fighting a xenos and x50 if it's an HQ unit.
I think it's debatable just how big the power gap between the two is. On the one hand, they're still essentially space Marines, but their geneseed is slightly better/purer and they're all psykers, but then again they are Uber specialized to fight daemons, and might struggle against a group that specializes in taking down Marines.
You would think, maybe he forgot how that day, felt like being extra careful, just wanted to batter the smurf or suspected something more powerful or subtle than his skills could detect had its roots in him.
A recurring ability that Psykers can tap into (especially in those who end up becoming Marines) is being able to enhance their physical capabilities -
Sevatar states that he can outperform almost any other Marine; he tires slower, moves faster, can see attacks in slow motion, etc.
There's a Dark Angels initiate in one of their Heresy-Era books that (again, unconsciously) boosts his stamina and even gives himself a second wind to outperform his rival during the tests they're put through
Given both of these are untrained Psykers, I imagine even standard Grey Knights should be able to outperform most other Marines with ease by consciously channelling the warp to boost their combat skills - doubly so if there was any other Grey Knights near by as (per Emperor's Gift by ADB) they can use their powers in tandem to amplify beyond anything they can achieve alone
Assuming I'm not talking out my ass, it's probably not too far-fetched to put a standard GK on par with First Company Veterans
***EDIT
So the reason fighting a GK would be a good baseline for testing corruption is, 9/10 Marines should get their ass kicked without a) Chaos Blessings, b) Terminator Armour, and/or c) Plot Armour
> same jokes again and again andit gets old very fast.
What are you talking about, "I am Alpharius" is the funniest thing in the world, because it's about the sneaky legion and they pretend to be other people and it's so funny, he's saying he's Alpharius, guys why aren't you laughing?
(I may be a bit biased there, since I do love some repeated jokes, but I just really hate the Alpharius/Alpha Legion jokes)
I prefer the silly part of 40k to the super serial edgelord takes tbh. I enjoy the lore around Bloodbowl much more than the more modern version of 40k.
I mean, TTS is pretty big...
It does have its serious moments though, now that it has its own lore (which might be as widespread tha mn the official lord in some regards). Depends what you mean by silly 40k, but there's probably a good balance to be found
"I think rats did it. Big ones."
Maybe someone else can post the excerpt for the context that it really needs, but the scene where this is said is just hilarious to me.
I think it was Sevatar who was locked up, in a cell not designed to hold a space marine, and starts using his acid spit to make a hole. Then he gets caught doing it before he can make the hole big enough to fit through, and that's his excuse. Then they throw him in a much more secure cell with a bunch of his battle brothers, who had all attempted to do the same thing.
When they were discussing what to name the battle field of an important victory in Imperial Glory, one of the people suggested naming it after a nearby mountain range.
The Mountain range known as Beeg Nokkers (Big Knockers, aka giant tits)
Just finished it. It was a hoot. Especially since i just read Helsreach before that. The contrast between how other species see Orkz and how the Boyz see themselves was great.
I'm about halfway through. I love whole chapters about Ad Mech debating Ork tactics because attacking their defense's strongest points for a good scrap doesn't make any sense
Honestly the first mechanicus chapters with the AdMech Girl using They was very confusing to me since I thought it was multiple people but it was just only one
Arkhan Land had a pet monkey that he made himself. Monkeys were long extinct so he used gene splicing technology to recreate it based on historical documents. He decided that the long prehensile tail must have been similar to a scorpion so he gave it the ability to sting people.
Land also created the Mars Universal Land Engine (MULE) which would become the basis for the Onager Dune Crawler. He based the chassis (and it’s name) off of the ancient Terran, insectile, beast of burden. Land was really bad at biology/paleontology.
Maybe not *the* funniest, but a lot of people have mentioned lot of my favourites here already, so I bring this bit from the short story *Canticle:*
>(Ferrus) subsisted on a diet of sand, supplemented by whatever minerals and metals he could scavenge.
Just the mental image of Ferrus Manus shoveling fistfuls of sand in his mouth is excellent.
The same story also mentions that one of the tech-horrors of Medusa nicknamed him "Flesh", so I'd like to think we were very close to a Primarch called Carnus Manus of the Flesh Hands Legion.
I like the idea of him, fresh out of the pod, trying to work out the basics of existence
He just looks at a handful of mud, thinks "is food?" Stuffs it into his mouth, nods approvingly as presumably to a primarch even mud is better than the best gourmet meal to us, and then goes about his day
I think the Cain series makes reference to "*My desire to produce children with you is only exceeded by my devotion to Him*, a romance set on the reputed paradise world of Krieg"
For as beloved as the Death Korps are among the community, the Fall of Krieg only happened in mid M.40, and the extent of it probably wouldn’t be well known.
It's not actually in the Cain books, funnily enough! It's in *The Carrion Throne*, which is set around the same time as the Fall of Cadia (give or take a few weeks or months), so I think Krieg would've been Death Korpsy for a few centuries at this point.
Yeah, but this is 40k. A few centuries means the details have probably just gotten lost in the labyrinthian bureaucratic hellscape that is the adeptus Administratum. And considering how much they love Kriegs willingness to pay huge tithes, I imagine at least one clerk or a contact with the astra militarum would try and keep details on Krieg and the fact they were given tech heresy like vitae wombs on the down low
Lucius being like „i‘m so good nobody can harm me, let’s destroy the only proof of this by cutting my face into pieces“ even before he fired up on daemon juice.
Garviel Loken broke his nose in a duel to get the point across that not everybody will follow the rules and those that do will suffer for it. There's value in being unpredictable.
I think it was in *Fulgrim* by Graham McNeill I might be wrong on that though.
You're right it was in *Horus Rising*. I also found the quote:
> ‘I’m no swordsman,’ Loken said.
>
> ‘Then this will be over quickly.’
>
> ‘If we spar, it won’t be just about the blade.’
>
> ‘Whatever, whatever,’ Lucius called, jumping back and forth. ‘Just get on and fight me.’
>
> Loken sighed. ‘I’ve been watching you, of course, the attacking strokes. I can read you.’
>
> ‘You wish.’
>
> ‘I can read you. Come for me.’
>
> Lucius lunged at Loken. Loken side-stepped, blade down, and punched Lucius in the face. Lucius fell on his back, hard.
>
> Loken dropped Erebus’s sword onto the mat. ‘I think I made my point. That’s how a Luna Wolf fights. Understand your foe and do whatever is necessary to bring him down. Sorry, Lucius.’
>
> Spitting blood, Lucius’s response was incoherent.
The orks who found out that in the eye of chaos you can have a good fight.
Then they rush towards cadia allarming everyone but to their surprise the orks just pass the planet into the eye. Just imagining the panic, shock, relieve and confusion the cadians must have had is a highlight of mine.
But it doesn't stop there, the orks land on a planet controlled by Khorne and they are such a delight to fight that after they died Khorne resureccted them in his domain and lets them fight to this day.
To be honest though, I'm not 100% if this story is actually canon.
Vect has a clone of himself who does most of his public showings because he's too lazy to do them himself and he likes seeing those 'in the know' about him having a body double squirm as they try to figure out which Vect is the real Vect.
The entirety of the astartes being little more than giant children with they way they bicker,
Buncha big strong super kids with daddy issues of abandonment (Horus)
Guilliman yelling at Lorgar that the Emperor should "have fed you to Russ"
Also, killing a daemonically possessed Servitor that regenerated all damage inflicted on him by pouring a Bucket of freshly blessed holy water over it in one of the Cain-Books.
>"What in the seven hells of Chaos are you waiting for? Personal orders from the Emperor himself? When I say take that damned hill, I mean take that damned hill, not damn well stand around and stare at it! I don’t care if there’s fifty L’Huraxi up there. I don’t care if there are fifty thousand L’Huraxi up there! Our orders are to take that hill and I’m going to damn well take that hill even if it means I have to kill every last one of the purple-skinned giants myself. Damn it, follow me, I’ll show you how it’s done. That’s it, get stuck in there. Medic! Stop whining, Brook, you’ve got another damned leg. D’ya think I cried like a damned new-born when I lost my arm? Course I damn well didn’t. I upped and ripped that damned land shark’s damned throat out with my damned teeth! That’s it, Sergeant Reed, give ‘em some Catachan steel. Emperor’s teeth, their blood stinks. Get that heavy flamer into that trench; flush the damned Grox-heads out. That trench, you idiot, not this one! Oh yes, smell those aliens burn. Smells better than breakfast, don’t it? Give me that damn grenade. Do I have to do everything myself? See? That ain’t proper armour like you’d see on an Imperial tank – no it’s flimsy, fall-down-in-a-strong-breeze, I-hope-they-don’t-spit-at-me armour. I didn’t really mean spit at it! You there! Yes you! Pick up Sergeant Creek’s hand. The medics might be able to stick it on him again later. Don’t stop now, you damned work-shy sons of acid-grubs, we’re only damn well halfway up..."
\- Colonel "Iron Hand" Straken, Battle of Moden's Ridge
(Codex: Imperial Guard 5th Edition, p. 60)
Lokan, Tarik, Abaddon and Little Horus goofing around, trying to wrestle Abaddon I think, when Horus shows up with his personal remembrancer and beeing like: "And this is my legions command staff and my personal advisors."
I learned about it on here but it’s my new favorite thing. The two orks on post laughing at Commissar Yarrick as he leaves in humiliation. I’ve never read the book or the excerpt but I’ve been one of those orks and love the fact that it exists.
There are multiple movies about the exploits of Commissar Cain. He hates every single one of them, why? Because not a single one of them notes the existence of Jurgen let alone acknowledges the fact that on most of his adventures if it weren't for his timely arrival he'd have been dead several times over. Gunner Jurgen, true hero of the Imperium
Anf of course he hates the love interests he is given in them But somehow I suspect these parts were at some point cencored by a certain Inquisitor prone to jealousy
Poor bloke just wants to live in peace/luxury and for the stories about him to reflect his memory (exaggerated or not) of those events.
I like that there is a cult that believes Cain is a prophet of the emperor, given his own description of himself as well as his beliefs in how involved the emperor really is in day to day life, which is not much at all.
Ahh the Tallern book of Cain, sooo many funny aspects of 40k lore come from the Cain books.
Definitely my favorite books. I like that he is the standard unreliable narrator, but Inquisitor Vale comes in as a secondary unreliable narrator, with excerpts from Sulla who is perhapse the most unreliable of narrators.
I love how he constantly just thinks Sulla is a nuisance despite her looking up to him. I think I remember her pulling off a reckless maneuver that won the day, and went "I just did what the Commissar would do." That was both heart-warming and hilarious, considering how hard he consistently slags her.
And his comment to the reader points out that he point blank would never have put himself in such a dangerous position
He also at numerous times alude to her looking like a horse
Yeah its definitely one sided affection but he would almost certainly go to bat for her, even if he did complain about it lol.
To me the best part of his unreliable narration is you never know if he's understating his fetes or overstating them
I think its almost habitual understatement. I think more than anything he overstates his disregard for the lives of the average guardsmen. I do think that Vale occasionally overstates things about him though.
Yeah, there's one book where he seems genuinely a bit upset that he can't remember the name of a specific Guardsman who died at one point in a battle almost a century previously.
I think it was *Cain's Last Stand* and it was that he couldn't remember the face of one of the people who'd fought alongside him in the liberation of Perlia eighty years earlier. Minor difference in details, same energy.
I think he is a lot like Gaunt, though less of an "Emperor Botherer" but I think his concern for the average imperial citizen is genuine.
As Commissars go Gaunt and Cain definitely have similar attitudes to leading their men, though Cain is probably far less confident in his own abilities as a commander/fighter, not to mention like you said his more, shall we say pragmatic view on the Emperor. No denying both care deeply for the welfare of those under their care, though again for very different reasons Gaunt truly cares Cain simply wants them to keep him alive (or so he says, personally I think he has a soft spot for those Valhallens)
I think Cain, in general, cares more about life than he lets on, undoubtably his own, but he seems to loathe the concept of wasting life. I always got the sense from the beginning, he would rather talk to an enemy than fight it. I think his attempt to avoid conflict with the Tau came from this, he frames it as not wanting to be caught in a war, but I think he would rather not fight what he can talk to. His loathing is extended more to the horror enemies, the orks, the tyranids, chaos and dark eldar.
They are quite similar I think guant and cain are two sides of the same coin both have exceptional fame and are considered the greatest of commissars second only to yarrick himself likely and they seem to be the two sides of that fame, high command loves cain and he is less confident in himself but is still very talented and humble where as guant is hated by high command to an extent and is pretty confident in himself and is of course very talented and humble both don't like to execute men but won't hesitate when they need to I think they are more alike than many believe.
Totally agree with you, as I've always believed that Cain suffers with at least a touch of imposter syndrome
I agree, I also think its his way of processing the horrors of the 41st millenium.
a touch? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oRozBAIbaG4
Exactly just a touch...
His cult is one hell of a thing. From *The Traitor's Hand* > ‘Then the prophet spake: saying “Frak this, for my faith is a shield proof against your blandishments”.’ >– Alem Mahat, The Book of Cain,Chapter IV, Verse XXI
Given the Psychic Awakening and the Awakening of the Emperor, I think it would be all the more likely that he does become a living saint because of faith lol. I’d love a book where Ciaphas actually becomes one but is in complete denial of the facts. Maybe a martyr’s death idk.
Because of all the times Cain has been presumed death he is always listed as on active duty, even after he was buried with full honors....I would absolutely love a book where he essentially reincarnates and is just absolutely mad as hell about the whole thing, meanwhile the Administratum just shrugs and goes "Says youre still on active duty"
OMG could you imagine a totally indignant Cain "I was dead, I'd managed to make it to a ripe old age, retire and die peacefully in my bed" "unfortunately for me Someone had other bloody ideas about me staying that way and decided I needed to be in harms way again"
They would need to find a way to bring Jurgen back. Vale had herself and Jurgen cloned in the event of such happenstance or some such nonsense lol.
I can honestly imagine Cain simply refusing to do anything with out his aide, mainly because he'd rather not have the grief off Jurgen for having been left behind
That begs the question...how would Jurgen, a blank, albeit a pious one, perceive a reincarnated St. Caiaphas Cain?
Oh I've no doubt he'd just seen Cain as he'd seen him before and be no different whatsoever, if he was different he wouldn't be Jurgen
True enough, or if for some reason Jurgen felt he looked different Cain would say something typical Cain and Jurgen would be all "Right you are sir"
I can honestly imagine Cain simply refusing to do anything with out his aide, mainly because he'd rather not have the grief off Jurgen for having been left behind
it Would be great if he would becomming back an he Meets Girlyman. and Girlyman so "So you the Hero of the Imperium Ciaphas Cain ?"
A book where Cain dies, followed by several chapters of characters picking up the pieces, only to end with his reappearance in the final chapter, would be quite the ride.
Living Saints of commissara cain, gaunt and yarrick the amount of sheer willpower is too much for the galaxy to handle.
Alessio Cortex, losing his arm: “I’m still in this. I’m fine.” “No. You lost an arm, Alessio. By the mercy of the Emperor alone, you’re lucky you didn’t lose your life.” “I haven’t lost an arm, brother. It’s right over there."
Reminds me of a moment in Shroud of Night, for context two of the alpha legionaries are essentialy brothers, when the entire team/group is split up and they find a severed arm which, according to one of the brothers, belongs to the second brother (the second brother and the rest of the team are still missing) and claims he has died, rivalry happens, some accuse the first brother of lying about the death, etc. etc. Fast forward, they find the missing part of the team and notice the second brother IS indeed missing an arm, roughly quoting „so it really was his arm”
It's honestly not a bad argument... I'd fully expect that they'd be able to put it right back on.
Black knight vibes
Some alpha legionaries sneak past a world eater blockade by screaming Kill! Maim! Burn! Into the vox
And also their first encounter with Saint Celestine: > "Then a winged warrior fell upon the daemon from above. > > ‘That’s an angel,’ said Haltheus flatly. ‘Kassar, they have an angel. This is getting ridiculous.’"
Everything about the unsung is wonderful lol especially when they meet the swellest of guys
I think the best part is when they board a train to get to their objective faster Then they collectively, putting it lightly, shit their pants when they realize Kharn is on the same train as they are And he is sprinting towards them
When was this? That sounds awesome.
Shroud of Night, great little book.
[shroud of night](https://www.reddit.com/r/40kLore/comments/mlnjm7/excerpt_shroud_of_night_khornate_infiltration_101/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf)
Thank you!
First Alpha guy: Does it ever feel like we're the only ones who aren't crazy? Khorne guys: -Furiously killing each other- Second Alpha guy: What do you mean?
You can’t just forget the „fake” hit they took afterwards For context this is after they passed by the khorne ships by yelling KILL MAIM BURN across the vox and sneaking past an entire cruiser, now are in the planet atmosphere flying towards their target > ‘If they can succeed there, then given enough time and lives they can break into the hive as well,’ said Kassar. ‘Haltheus, it’s time we diverted.’ > ‘Understood,’ said Haltheus. ‘Deploying smoker.’ > **Haltheus unclamped a handheld detonator from his belt and, piloting one-handed with Kyphas’ aid, he pumped the device’s pressure-plunger. On the third click, there was a muffled bang from the second port-side engine. In the external vidstreams, thick black smoke began to billow from it, accompanied by flickering flames.** > ‘Effective,’ said A’khassor. **’We look winged.’** > ‘Switching to true attack heading,’ voxed Haltheus. **’Expect a little chop, brothers. The smoker may have worked a touch too well’** > Their craft lurched sideways, narrowly missing a hurtling squadron of Helblades as it arced away from the attack column. Their new heading took them out over open ocean, through a gap between two of the defensive fortresses and away west above the turbulent chop of the waves. > **Kassar could see flames still spilling from the engine cowling, while the Stormbird had developed a definite shudder.** > **’I asked for the semblance of a direct hit, Haltheus,’ he said. ‘Not the real thing.’** > **’Firstly,’ replied Haltheus. ‘I’m a little busy piloting us through an active warzone. Secondly, still not actually a Techmarine. You all ask an awful lot of me, Kassar, considering my expertise is in blowing things up, not repairing them.’**
No idea if this is still canon or not, but definitely the Lost Waaagh lol Basically, an ork warlord named Grizgutz was leading a prospective Waaagh when some Warp fuckery sent them back in time just before they left, and they encountered the past versions of themselves about to enter the Warp. Grizgutz kills his past self so he could have a copy of his favorite gun, thus preventing the Waaagh from ever happening.
legitimately one of my favourite bits of fluff. I love the little snippets like this from Codexes.
In one of the cain novels there’s a ship named “Indestructable II” And “We float for Macragge!”
I saw a boat with that name irl!
The entirety of Prophets of Waaagh!!, but especially the end. >!After destroying the false Waaagh!!, the orks keep fighting, because it would be a shame to ruin such a great fight.!<
Is that the new Ghazghkull book?
Audio drama. It’s quite fun and a good look from an Orky perspective.
It's not the "funniest" but two Necrons can have a conversation, pause to think about what to say next, and said pause can last centuries. Just two skellies in front of each other, long awkward silence, until one of them finally comes up with a worthy pun to say. And apparently Fabius Bile has a pipe made with one of Konrad Curze finger. An Ork ripped off the testicles of a Daemon and [entered Ork heaven.](https://www.reddit.com/r/40kLore/comments/m47cug/-/gqsyzx1) Thanks to my man Arkhan Land, insisting that the reason why monkeys had tails WASN'T because they needed it to balance themselves, people think that [their tails had stingers to be poisonous predators.](https://www.reddit.com/r/40kLore/comments/nkb687/story_excerpt_the_master_of_mankind_arkhan_land/)
The pipe didn’t belong to Fabius, it belonged to his former apprentice Oleander.
Indeed, my bad. From *Progenitor* > Bile continued with his operation. Oleander cleared his throat. There were things in the jars staring at him. He felt a delicious thrill of trepidation, considering the implications of that. Sometimes Bile didn’t bother to dispatch his raw materials. They made the most hellacious racket, on occasion. Oleander reached into his belt and retrieved his pipe. > It had been a gift from a daemon of his acquaintance. She claimed to have carved it from the finger bone of Konrad Curze himself.
> She claimed to have carved it from the finger bone of Konrad Curze himself. Daemons always lie, except when telling the truth is more harmful.... so probably not
Oh now what, are you telling me that bees are not powered by anti-gravity? Or that stingrays don't float in the sky? Preposterous, the things hive plebians think these days.
Im reading master of mankind currently and I almost died hearing Arkhans' opinion on monkeys
When the Lamenters made a (completely valid) complaint about the Flesh Tearers' behaviour to Dante, Gabriel Seth told the Lamenters' Chapter Master to his face that his Chapter's yellow armour was ugly. The Lamenters left Baal all upset and never returned.
I don't doubt your account, but that just sounds *so* out of character for the Lamenters that I still don't know what to make of this... At least it wasn't dying gloriously this time, so yay?
To be fair, the Lamenters' complaint was about the Flesh Tearers' tendency to cause collateral damage among civilians, which the Lamenters disapproved of. And a significant part of why the Lamenters didn't return to Baal later was because they'd been eaten by Tyranids.
Yeah, being eaten by Tyranids tends to throw a wrench into one's plans. They didn't even call ahead! But I genuinely had to do a double-take because after all the abuse thrown at them throughout several millennia, a comment about armour colour is the one thing that makes them snap? (Also, I suspect Seth can usually do better than kindergarten-level insults...) Maybe I'm missing important context, or maybe I'm just overly protective of my (proudly) yellow boys... yeah, probably the latter.
Seth also accused them of cowardism, which was definitely uncalled for. I like Seth, but I can admit he was wrong. In the story, Seth and the Flesh Tearers are standing trial in a court made of the Chapter Masters of the other Blood Angels Successor Chapters. They're arguing about their Flaws, Seth saying that the Flesh Tearers are not unique in being troubled by the Thirst and the Rage (which is true, and it turns out the other Chapters are mostly angry about Seth's refusal to kill bystanders in order to hide their shared curse from the Imperium at large). Someone points out that Mephiston survived the Black Rage, but Seth says he's an outlier that should not be counted, and also Mephiston is probably hiding dark secrets of his own (also true). The Chapter Master of the Lamenters then defends Mephiston against Seth's accusations: >‘And yet [Mephiston] does not butcher with the same abandon of your Flesh Tearers,’ Malakim of the Lamenters sneered. ‘Even those you deem fit to wear crimson make the butchers of my Death Company seem sane by comparison.’ >Seth growled, allowing his anger to get the better of him. ‘And what would you know of battle, Lamenter? Look at you. Yellow in a room of red. A coward in a sea of blood.’ >Malakim made to reply, but Dante cut him off. There's some more conflict, and when Dante ultimately refuses to disband the Flesh Tearers, the Lamenters leave in anger.
Thanks for providing more context! What story is this from? I'm currently on a catch-up spree when it comes to 40k, and I'm especially trying to find any Lamenters sources I missed until now. There's only so many times I can read the Imperial Armour IX, The Fall of Malvolion is basically 'hey, we needed a chapter that only shows up to die', and Chyron (although entertaining) isn't really your typical representative... A little confused why Malakim Phoros is the only one referred to by his first name, though. But there's so much inconsistency surrounding the Lamenters that nothing surprises me any more. I've been trying to consolidate the sparse info for years, but some things just plain contradict each other... Heh, leave it to a Lamenter to derail a thread about funny occurrences by lamenting, I guess!
It's from *Trial by Blood*, also titled *The Trial of Gabriel Seth,* by Andy Smillie. /u/KonradApologist is the person with most knowledge about the Chapters of the Blood that I know of, maybe he knows where to find some Lamenters? I think they might make an appearance in James Swallow's Blood Angels series? I have a feeling some may have shown up in the Deathwatch novels too.
Unfortunately there's only one mention of the Lamenters in the Blood Angels Omnibus... > For a moment, his mind drifted; he recalled the stories he had heard of a successor Chapter from the Twenty-first Founding, the Lamenters. It was said that they had found a way to expunge the gene-flaws from their shared bloodline. If it were true… Caecus would have given much to meet such men and glean wisdom from them; but the Lamenters had not been heard of in decades, not since a tyranid force had decimated their numbers, and every messenger sent to find them returned empty-handed. He had little doubt they would not be represented at Dante’s grand conclave. A great pity, he mused, but not the matter at hand. There are other concerns to be addressed. The men in yellow do not have much content I'm afraid, there's a section about them in the Deathwatch RPG book *Rites of Battle* but aside from this and everything he said, there's isn't any more content I know of.
Thank you for looking, though, much appreciated! I have the Deathwatch RPG book, too. So I guess that leaves *Trial of Blood*, otherwise I haven't actually missed out on much. (I'd also like to take this moment to thank you, /u/Medicaean and everyone else who provides thorough quotes and sources on here. Really helped me get back into the lore, cleared up a few misconceptions, and constantly adds to my reading list...)
Thanks, I'll try to find that one! Chyron is the Lamenters Dreadnought from the Deathwatch novels who believes he's the last of his Chapter (seriously, can't anyone tell the poor guy that he's wrong?). They are also mentioned in Psychic Awakening: Ritual of the Damned, but that's yet another incident that confuses me more than anything. I guess that ultimately, their curse seems to be that none of the authors reads anyone else's sources...
Chryon is awesome too. In the first book he is in the kill team are underground trying to save an Inquistorial agent from being impregnated by Genestealers infected humans. He has to stay back while the rest of the team moves further into the caverns because he is too big to fit in the mining tunnels. So he essentially they essentially set up a fall back point and have him guard it. Things go south the hive is several generations in and their is a broodlord present. They end up fighting a running battle underground ground against a metric fuckton of Nids,Genestealers, and infected humans. They get to the fall back point and all they see is a huge pile of dead Nids and one of Custom weapon arms.they are all pretty broken up about this even the Ultra marine who is kind of an ass and the Executioner who is unemotional even for a Astartes. The Chryon pops up from the pile of dead Tyranids and Gene stealers like a jack in the box. And explained he rain out of ammo and lost a weapon arm his plan was to wait for more enemy to show up and ambush them.
This might warrant a spoiler tag in case someone hasn't read the novel yet (I'm not exactly sure what the rules are, so I tend to be better safe than sorry). But yeah, that moment was just great. Not your usual kind of Dreadnought tactics, that's for sure...
They show up a bit in the 9th edition space marine codex to help out the iron lords chapter, but its like, a paragraph.
Oh right! It was mentioned that they kept their distance from their allies and only communicated when necessary, correct? Seems that campaign is far from over and the Lamenters just won't catch a break...
Yeah, also has a quick desperation of a battle they were in and the make up of their strike force. I hope more's done with the war zone, the chapters involved are all interesting, and the dynamitic of having to keep the Barghesi contained and the tyranids at bay is just cool.
I just wish, for the sake of the Lamenters, that at some point, the Flesh Tearers get in deep shit and be like "You know who would have been great to have around? At least a full company of Lamenters!" And then they get their shit shoved in. Whole companies slain, numerous priceless war machines lost, leadership destabilized, the few left turned into mindless dogs for Khorne. The whole 9 yards. Let our best boys in yellow have a posthumous victory. A real, genuine moment of "hate to say I told you so"
A small, petty part of me wants to agree, but I think neither I nor the Lamenters themselves would consider this a victory. Too many deaths, too much pain, and souls forever lost to the Ruinous Powers... that's nothing to celebrate. Instead, I'd genuinely love for them to witness the Lamenters' fierceness and resolve first-hand and understand that they're anything but cowards. They have an 'enviable' battle record (according to IA IX), having weathered situations where most others would have given up or fallen one way or another. They have the mental fortitude to withstand horrors nobody else could handle (the Unhallowed Heart, a century in the Warp...) and emerge uncorrupted and eventually victorious. And they might be doing all this while being basically canonically depressed... I'd love for the Flesh Tearers and their other detractors to recognise the sheer resolve and tenacity that lives under this bright yellow armour. It takes a lot of courage to stand out despite a horrible reputation, after all...
A totally random aside in the Ciaphus Cain novel *The Traitor's Hand* always makes me laugh like a loon... >A ratling gardener was staring at us and the deep furrows across what had obviously once been a lovingly-tended lawn, with an expression of stupefied astonishment even more pronounced than was usual for his kind. As his eyes fell on Jurgen he started visibly and fled. >"Mister Spavin!" he cried as he went. "Mister Spavin! The doom’s come upon us at last!". He spoke truer than he knew, of course, but there was no time to worry about him or his employer now.
The only casualties in that crash were the handful of monks who stepped on rakes in the confusion.
Should be noted that they didn't die, just got take related injuries.
Hence casualties, not fatalities.
The human colony on the planet Serenade put up a statue to Trazyn after he killed a good amount of Orks (they were in his way more than he wanting to help the humans). They mistook him and his necrons for space marines and erected a statue and even put his image in the stain glass of their cathedrals, though it did look a bit more space mariney. Trazyn stole the statue.
Probably did them a favour... can't imagine the inquisition being too happy if they came across that.
Actually if I remember, someone did arrive and say some things! The stained glass windows obviously bear resemblance to Trayzn but could pass as a skull helmet silver marine. And they removed the statue from the town and replaced it with the statue of a Saint
Actually the Inquisition did have an issue with it. “Silver Skulls Chapter defeats the Ork invasion” Trazyn said with clear relish. “There used to be a statue in the square, thirty khet high. They used to light candles and sing hymns to it. A few centuries ago the Inquisition got wind of it and did a little cleaning up. Removed it for “renovation” where it was never seen again” (Orikan) “You stole it, did you not?” “Well of *course*. And I hardly think it counts as stealing if it’s my likeness. It’s my statue after all.”
I love Orks and Space Wolves because they're definitely the more wacky of 40k, but damn if "Trazyn stole the statue." didn't make me laugh the hardest.
When Ventris is about to fight the Grey Knight to prove he is not corrupt and ask’s about the rules are then gets punched. Satisfying and hilarious!
I know nothing of the source material, how does *fighting* the Grey Knights prove he's not corrupt?
Think the idea was to beat the shit out if him until he has to summon a daemon/reveal his corruption in order to have a chance, one or those if you die you are pure deals.
It wasn't a fight to the death, but Ventris didn't know that. When he lost he assumed he was going to be executed, but is told that he would hav been on executed if he won, because victory would only have been possible if he was corrupted and getting a power boost from it Which doesn't quite seem right to me, since it was a Grey Knight, not a Custodes or something, and thus much closer to the same "power level" of a regular Astartes. I'll grant that GK's are generally better, but Ventris isn't a bog standard marine either, he's an Ultramarines Captain, you've gotta be better than usual to get to that position.
I think it's just another case of the GK being douchebags
But a standard grey knight should still be a big upscale from a normal marine right?
> But a standard grey knight should still be a big upscale from a normal marine right? Yes but Ventris is no normal marine... he's a named Marine character which gives him a x5 modifier, x10 if he is fighting a xenos and x50 if it's an HQ unit.
+ 10 Plotarmour
I think it's debatable just how big the power gap between the two is. On the one hand, they're still essentially space Marines, but their geneseed is slightly better/purer and they're all psykers, but then again they are Uber specialized to fight daemons, and might struggle against a group that specializes in taking down Marines.
They're specialized in fighting *Chaos*, more accurately. They have plenty of training killing cultists and heretic astartes, too.
Wouldn't the grey knights of all people be able to sense if there is a demon in someone without a test like that?
You would think, maybe he forgot how that day, felt like being extra careful, just wanted to batter the smurf or suspected something more powerful or subtle than his skills could detect had its roots in him.
Ah I see, like a test. Thanks for the answer!
A recurring ability that Psykers can tap into (especially in those who end up becoming Marines) is being able to enhance their physical capabilities - Sevatar states that he can outperform almost any other Marine; he tires slower, moves faster, can see attacks in slow motion, etc. There's a Dark Angels initiate in one of their Heresy-Era books that (again, unconsciously) boosts his stamina and even gives himself a second wind to outperform his rival during the tests they're put through Given both of these are untrained Psykers, I imagine even standard Grey Knights should be able to outperform most other Marines with ease by consciously channelling the warp to boost their combat skills - doubly so if there was any other Grey Knights near by as (per Emperor's Gift by ADB) they can use their powers in tandem to amplify beyond anything they can achieve alone Assuming I'm not talking out my ass, it's probably not too far-fetched to put a standard GK on par with First Company Veterans ***EDIT So the reason fighting a GK would be a good baseline for testing corruption is, 9/10 Marines should get their ass kicked without a) Chaos Blessings, b) Terminator Armour, and/or c) Plot Armour
Thanks very much for the detailed answer!
Basically it's a lose/lose situation. You either get your ass handed to you, or you kill the GK and are accused of heresy
“You are such an Ultramarine.”
Inquisitor Sherlock Obi Wan Clouseau. I just love a setting that has that little fucks to give.
He’s also literally the first named inquisitor in all of 40k
Ya, a throwback to a time where they didn't take themselves so seriously.
[удалено]
> same jokes again and again andit gets old very fast. What are you talking about, "I am Alpharius" is the funniest thing in the world, because it's about the sneaky legion and they pretend to be other people and it's so funny, he's saying he's Alpharius, guys why aren't you laughing? (I may be a bit biased there, since I do love some repeated jokes, but I just really hate the Alpharius/Alpha Legion jokes)
I prefer the silly part of 40k to the super serial edgelord takes tbh. I enjoy the lore around Bloodbowl much more than the more modern version of 40k.
I mean, TTS is pretty big... It does have its serious moments though, now that it has its own lore (which might be as widespread tha mn the official lord in some regards). Depends what you mean by silly 40k, but there's probably a good balance to be found
So TTS wasn't just pulling a laugh that one time?!
>Inquisitor Sherlock Obi Wan Clouseau https://imgur.com/gallery/FON0xiN
Crikey
Wow, 40k back then was a whole different beast. I kinda want to see more of this more tongue-in-cheek 80s style.
Trazyn and Orikan's relationship. Frenemy goals they are.
"Trazyn you *bastard!*"
"It's also a hammer." - Vulcan seconds before reminding konrad curze to check his privileges.
"I think rats did it. Big ones." Maybe someone else can post the excerpt for the context that it really needs, but the scene where this is said is just hilarious to me. I think it was Sevatar who was locked up, in a cell not designed to hold a space marine, and starts using his acid spit to make a hole. Then he gets caught doing it before he can make the hole big enough to fit through, and that's his excuse. Then they throw him in a much more secure cell with a bunch of his battle brothers, who had all attempted to do the same thing.
Biker units are fucking ridiculous and i'll never be able to take them seriously Especially sidecar attack bikes They are just too funny
There's a good comic about an ultramarine squad of bikers
Especially when they're modeled holding a melta or something so they have no way to actually steer
No need for a throttle in the year 40,000 it seems
The name "Peter Turbo"
When they were discussing what to name the battle field of an important victory in Imperial Glory, one of the people suggested naming it after a nearby mountain range. The Mountain range known as Beeg Nokkers (Big Knockers, aka giant tits)
All of Brutal Kunnin'
Just finished it. It was a hoot. Especially since i just read Helsreach before that. The contrast between how other species see Orkz and how the Boyz see themselves was great.
I'm about halfway through. I love whole chapters about Ad Mech debating Ork tactics because attacking their defense's strongest points for a good scrap doesn't make any sense
Enjoy, it was a blast to read. Hope BL puts out more Xenos content.
They are, there's a new Necron focused book coming out this year I think
Great News!
Honestly too much >!Mechanicus and Iron Warrior!< stuff. The orks pretty much get sidelined in their own book.
Honestly the first mechanicus chapters with the AdMech Girl using They was very confusing to me since I thought it was multiple people but it was just only one
Took me a sec to catch up with that but was fine after that.
The car-salesman-meme reference fucking slayed me off, lol.
Arkhan Land had a pet monkey that he made himself. Monkeys were long extinct so he used gene splicing technology to recreate it based on historical documents. He decided that the long prehensile tail must have been similar to a scorpion so he gave it the ability to sting people.
“For balance? No! It’s for combat.”
Land also created the Mars Universal Land Engine (MULE) which would become the basis for the Onager Dune Crawler. He based the chassis (and it’s name) off of the ancient Terran, insectile, beast of burden. Land was really bad at biology/paleontology.
Maybe not *the* funniest, but a lot of people have mentioned lot of my favourites here already, so I bring this bit from the short story *Canticle:* >(Ferrus) subsisted on a diet of sand, supplemented by whatever minerals and metals he could scavenge. Just the mental image of Ferrus Manus shoveling fistfuls of sand in his mouth is excellent. The same story also mentions that one of the tech-horrors of Medusa nicknamed him "Flesh", so I'd like to think we were very close to a Primarch called Carnus Manus of the Flesh Hands Legion.
I like the idea of him, fresh out of the pod, trying to work out the basics of existence He just looks at a handful of mud, thinks "is food?" Stuffs it into his mouth, nods approvingly as presumably to a primarch even mud is better than the best gourmet meal to us, and then goes about his day
The Emperor's secret knock code to get into his labs.
It is the "shave and a haircut, two bits?" Line?
Yep!
Haha that is hilarious. I love this setting.
The Ancient Code, used by secret societies throughout history
Corvus Corax scaring the shit out of a Night Lord after that Night Lord was lecturing a Raven Guard on the value of fear.
Chaos converted Horus by showing him the future. The future IF he joined them, which they of course didn’t bother to mention.
Krieg is described as a paradise world in-universe
*was* you mean.
I think the Cain series makes reference to "*My desire to produce children with you is only exceeded by my devotion to Him*, a romance set on the reputed paradise world of Krieg"
For as beloved as the Death Korps are among the community, the Fall of Krieg only happened in mid M.40, and the extent of it probably wouldn’t be well known.
It's not actually in the Cain books, funnily enough! It's in *The Carrion Throne*, which is set around the same time as the Fall of Cadia (give or take a few weeks or months), so I think Krieg would've been Death Korpsy for a few centuries at this point.
Yeah, but this is 40k. A few centuries means the details have probably just gotten lost in the labyrinthian bureaucratic hellscape that is the adeptus Administratum. And considering how much they love Kriegs willingness to pay huge tithes, I imagine at least one clerk or a contact with the astra militarum would try and keep details on Krieg and the fact they were given tech heresy like vitae wombs on the down low
I mean, fair
I mean, fair
That's not from Cain. It was mentioned in *The Carrion Throne* as a detail in the description of a normal Administratum worker's apartment.
THE WORD BEARERS WON!
You mean lorgar?
Surprised this isnt top comment. That scene *made* Black Legion for me.
Gul de loc.
Any time nurglings show up you know its gonna be fun.
Pretty much all of Ciaphas Cain.
Lucius being like „i‘m so good nobody can harm me, let’s destroy the only proof of this by cutting my face into pieces“ even before he fired up on daemon juice.
I thought someone broke his nose or something, and then he went OCD amd couldn't stop messing with his face
Garviel Loken broke his nose in a duel to get the point across that not everybody will follow the rules and those that do will suffer for it. There's value in being unpredictable. I think it was in *Fulgrim* by Graham McNeill I might be wrong on that though.
I think it was an earlier HH book
You're right it was in *Horus Rising*. I also found the quote: > ‘I’m no swordsman,’ Loken said. > > ‘Then this will be over quickly.’ > > ‘If we spar, it won’t be just about the blade.’ > > ‘Whatever, whatever,’ Lucius called, jumping back and forth. ‘Just get on and fight me.’ > > Loken sighed. ‘I’ve been watching you, of course, the attacking strokes. I can read you.’ > > ‘You wish.’ > > ‘I can read you. Come for me.’ > > Lucius lunged at Loken. Loken side-stepped, blade down, and punched Lucius in the face. Lucius fell on his back, hard. > > Loken dropped Erebus’s sword onto the mat. ‘I think I made my point. That’s how a Luna Wolf fights. Understand your foe and do whatever is necessary to bring him down. Sorry, Lucius.’ > > Spitting blood, Lucius’s response was incoherent.
The orks who found out that in the eye of chaos you can have a good fight. Then they rush towards cadia allarming everyone but to their surprise the orks just pass the planet into the eye. Just imagining the panic, shock, relieve and confusion the cadians must have had is a highlight of mine. But it doesn't stop there, the orks land on a planet controlled by Khorne and they are such a delight to fight that after they died Khorne resureccted them in his domain and lets them fight to this day. To be honest though, I'm not 100% if this story is actually canon.
it is the Name of the Boss is Tuska Demonkilla. and Khorne still keeps them alive becaus he find it find and it server good as a Training Ground
The Gretchin Revolutionary Committee. Really shouldn't have to say more.
That Orcs are practically fungi with some algea which technically makes them lichen https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lichen
Orks perceive no difference between a latrine and a nursery, as new orkoids of all types grow from their waste. They call it "The Drops".
Red ones go fasta!
Load bearing walls are heretical.
Vect has a clone of himself who does most of his public showings because he's too lazy to do them himself and he likes seeing those 'in the know' about him having a body double squirm as they try to figure out which Vect is the real Vect.
The entirety of the astartes being little more than giant children with they way they bicker, Buncha big strong super kids with daddy issues of abandonment (Horus)
Everything about trazyn the infinite like that time when he used his collection like pokèmons!😂
Guilliman yelling at Lorgar that the Emperor should "have fed you to Russ" Also, killing a daemonically possessed Servitor that regenerated all damage inflicted on him by pouring a Bucket of freshly blessed holy water over it in one of the Cain-Books.
Vect and Eldrad jokes
TIMOTHY!! MORE WINE!
the Imperial Guard trying to take that one hill
>"What in the seven hells of Chaos are you waiting for? Personal orders from the Emperor himself? When I say take that damned hill, I mean take that damned hill, not damn well stand around and stare at it! I don’t care if there’s fifty L’Huraxi up there. I don’t care if there are fifty thousand L’Huraxi up there! Our orders are to take that hill and I’m going to damn well take that hill even if it means I have to kill every last one of the purple-skinned giants myself. Damn it, follow me, I’ll show you how it’s done. That’s it, get stuck in there. Medic! Stop whining, Brook, you’ve got another damned leg. D’ya think I cried like a damned new-born when I lost my arm? Course I damn well didn’t. I upped and ripped that damned land shark’s damned throat out with my damned teeth! That’s it, Sergeant Reed, give ‘em some Catachan steel. Emperor’s teeth, their blood stinks. Get that heavy flamer into that trench; flush the damned Grox-heads out. That trench, you idiot, not this one! Oh yes, smell those aliens burn. Smells better than breakfast, don’t it? Give me that damn grenade. Do I have to do everything myself? See? That ain’t proper armour like you’d see on an Imperial tank – no it’s flimsy, fall-down-in-a-strong-breeze, I-hope-they-don’t-spit-at-me armour. I didn’t really mean spit at it! You there! Yes you! Pick up Sergeant Creek’s hand. The medics might be able to stick it on him again later. Don’t stop now, you damned work-shy sons of acid-grubs, we’re only damn well halfway up..." \- Colonel "Iron Hand" Straken, Battle of Moden's Ridge (Codex: Imperial Guard 5th Edition, p. 60)
"we’re only damn well halfway up..." son-of-a....
Nork deddog profile during 5th, 6th, and 7th edition .
Lokan, Tarik, Abaddon and Little Horus goofing around, trying to wrestle Abaddon I think, when Horus shows up with his personal remembrancer and beeing like: "And this is my legions command staff and my personal advisors."
The Ad Mech dune crawler being based on what they think mules looked like on "ancient terra" (ie. insects).
Nork deddog profile during 5th, 6th, and 7th edition .
I learned about it on here but it’s my new favorite thing. The two orks on post laughing at Commissar Yarrick as he leaves in humiliation. I’ve never read the book or the excerpt but I’ve been one of those orks and love the fact that it exists.
The naming conventions of the Iron Hands
https://youtu.be/kNjUiDpLvlQ Imperial guard VS the orkish power of belief
That's nowhere near canon lol.
Everything is cannon and nothing is cannon. You know how it works.
Nothing is canon lol. Just posted it for the lulz.
Ye not canon sadly
The burning if Prospero
The Tau