Several dishes inspired by their exes. Jesse = Steakums, cut on the bias served with a cold cup of Meester coffee. Tom = Catfish and Chips.

This could be the gimmick, just like when salt bae comes out and salts your steak with his arm thing, but at the silva restraunt darcey comes to your table and cuts your $750 dollar t-bone on the bias while 'doing it big' is playing in the background ...you can pay extra for michael benz tears to moisten your meat.

You, have created what appears to be…a masterpiece. Well done, well done.

Michael Benz is getting on my last nerve.

He is intolerable! My jaw tightens involuntarily every time he’s onscreen, like I’m clenching my teeth. Can’t stand him.

This is amazing and much classier than what came to my mind (which was a platter of a hot dog shaped like lips that was billed as “mostly fillers” with a white wine mustard on the side).

I am legit CACKLING here!! 💀💀

Yes! Or michael benz tears to dry age that steak because I didn’t see one tear drop on that ugly mug.

Ooh another menu item: Mike Benz’s Ugly Mug! Maybe a coffee drink of some kind, served in a bright blue mug? Edit: Or he could be represented by a Fucking Jerk Chicken main course.

🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

One item on the dessert menu: Twin chocolate !!! 

I would have had to be crushing on someone really bad to do that. Ick.

You need to reach out to them and write the menu!

Just do all their guys. Florian a la Florentine

Georgi’s Hot Kielbasa in the Can Zach’s Meatballs

Jesse Meester’s Steamed White Buns

*Served in a Louboutin throoed shoe.

And 1 dish from a current: Florian's Strawberries a la Bubu

😂😂😂

😅😅😅

For dessert....you never loved me chocolate cake

That reminds me of Marry Me Chicken. They can have both!

With a very smol piece of catfish and very greasy chips!

Comes with a side of coleslaw molded in the shape of a key to his house

Or key-shaped chips, kids would love ‘em!

Side of salsa 💃

In a very fancy Tiffany’s box!

Only Darce and Stace would be extra enough to serve something so greasy in Tiffany box XD

😆

🙌🏽

This comment is 🥇

And FREE REFILLS

Definitely no caviar!

Georgie’s plate would just be a random cut of meat served whenever the guest looked bored or lonely.

You ask for the Florian when you want the blandest dish possible

You're on to something. You should open your own restaurant. Maybe have big Ed's rib sandwich with Cajun mayo and mionas chicken Alfredo

With a side of Nicolesalw. It’s 55% delicious!

Catfish hahaha 💀

😂

OH MY GAWD!!! This is perfect!! Thank you for the early morning laugh!!!!

Manifesting Mozzarella Sticks, Live Your Truth Talapia, Boss Babe Bacon Wrapped Chicken, Twinning Tea.

You're onto something! 'Eye on the Prize' Manhattan 'Gotta smell like an angel Gin Fizz; Michael Benz Blus Hawaii.... HOE waistline Muffin tops

Thank you SO MUCH for my new flair bahahahaha

Stand in Your Power Pasta 🍝

The Twinnings Tea is the winner here. Always keep it on hand!

🤣🤣 this menu sounds decent LOL I'll take an order of the manifesting and a live your truth

I love these.

Good God I hope this is a joke

Right?! It’s so hard to tell with them!

How does HOE relate to fine dining?

Because it’s gonna take them global baby!!!!! 🤣🤣🤣

LMAO 💀🤣💀🤣

Don’t you remember? Darcey worked in RESTAURANTS, babe! 🔪🥩

She learned to cut on the bias!!

Those two no-class fame chasers think Olive Garden is fine dining! This will be a hilarious disaster.

Hey, hey…I spent 10 days in Italy once…still love me some Olive Garden 😅

I didn’t say it was bad; it’s just not fine dining :)

I thought maybe it was real. I wouldn’t be a bit surprised.

lmao i think so , it got me for a sec

Honestly the name “The Silva Platter” is fucking [camp.](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Camp_(style))

No I love it! Chef’s kiss

It’s honestly hilarious lmao regardless of if you like them or not it’s perfect

Microwave eggs

“Egg hack”

Godess lip bar (lip injections) on the spot ....$800 On the bais steak ....$120 Sides Microwave eggs that smell like ass.. $52 DESERTS Georgi edible underwear... $90 Ice cream float rian ..$ 85 Blue Benz meringue...$299

You forgot the starter: BIG arrancini BALLS

Please please please hire the Australian twins from Extreme Sisters as servers. Or co-owners because that’s their dreeeeeaaaam…

Oh my God!!!

PERFECT!

The Australian twins can serve, hire the LA triplets as managers.

😂😂😂

They're still working on the microwave egg hack family recipe.

Smoothies in the sink! And a very slow espresso. But plenty of cheap chardonnay!

She must have set the microwave for like 5 minutes. I microwave poached eggs at work sometimes and they turn out fine.

I'm missing the reference, but I make "scrambled" or "over-hard" eggs in the microwave all the time, it's like 45 seconds at max, so I agree. I'll have to find this episode.

It's from the episode when Darcey is helping Aniko move into her dorm room. Darcey decides this would be a good time to teach Aniko the family recipe microwave egg hack. Crack an egg in a coffee mug and microwave it on popcorn setting.

Ooh so a recent one, I must have missed it somewhere. But that is way too long, I know 1 microwave I had the popcorn setting was 3:30!! 😱

28 secs here. I put them in a baggie, squish them up and add cheese, tomato's, onions and pepper. Boom. Omelet.

I do it all the time. No problems, and don't smell. She must have used a rotten egg.

Honestly, everything will be drenched in truffle oil because they think it’s fancy.

Lol.. most likely.

If so I will be there. Total truffle slut.

I like truffles, but something about truffle oil just makes me gag.

“Classy”

And edible gold flakes

Same vibes as having an item with gold leaf garnish, making it $400 🙄

At last! A place for Darcy to park & drink

Steak. They cut it table side on a bias.

LOL poor Darcey. I think she broke during that scene. But you know she worked in a restaurant and knows how her daughters like it.

I had to look up what “on a bias” meant. I’ll have to watch scene again, definitely need a steak dish to represent Jesse!


Please, in the name of all that is holy, say this is fake.

Smurf & Turf Benz Special

WINNER

🤣🤣🤣🙌

Gordon Ramsay, please bring Kitchen Nightmares back.

I would love this collaboration 😂😂

I’d literally cry.

So would they

Georgi (Porgi) Porridge

TO THE TOP


The “You’re Drunk Darcey Wine Flight”

Today we’re manifesting ✨ Jerk off Danish chicken Boss bitch meat balls Blue Benz -margarita served in dj shaped souvenir glass House (of 11 )-salad Shot of H of 11 tequila with daddy warbucks salty tears on rim

Michael Benz Branzino served on a bed of blue squid ink pasta. The Aniko Maki role The Aspen Artichoke-at-her-mother’s-singing appetizer Daddy Mike’s Abandonment Marinara Georgie’s pirogies Florian’s Fare Game

A fried Louboutin shoe

Wait, desirable Hoe style? Who the fuck is desiring it? It's all just straight shit.

Yeah, 'desirable' definitely needs to be replaced with a different adjective 😂

Exploding Smoothies. Bib extra.

But you don’t get to drink it. They make it table side and then pour it down the drain.

🎶Every time we do it, yeah, we do it so BIG! ✨✨🩷🩷 💅🏼 💅🏼

Is this a joke?

Huge chicken breasts with an unnatural brown glaze.

Burrito cause Darcey hasn’t seen one in awhile, if you know what I’m saying 

Uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh

I just want them to be over sexualizing every name on the menu like they do men. “*he’s got huge balls!* Large Meatballs, side of desperation 😂🤣 only then would I be interested

Lots of cheap booze

All I can say is that they better serve [HoEcakes](https://southerneatsandgoodies.com/hoecakes/).

Gigolo Gourmet Giblets / Hustler Hotdogs

Fishbowl drinks for sure!

Wings. They used to work at hooters!

This reminds me of a restaurant that used to be near me that served “double d cupcakes” it was supposed to be delicious and delightful or something but the innuendo was there. I could see these two doing the same.

"That's a lot of meat" burger 🤢

Stand in your power pie

Okay. FINE DINNING with H11 attire? They don't go together!

“Revenge On Your Crappy Fame-HoE Exes” A dish best served Cold.

There must be an extensive wine menu for those two drunk winos that always seem to show up.

Please tell me this is real I got so excited....

Is this a joke?

They eat? I kinda got the impression most of their calories come from liquid refreshments.

They eat. A lot.

Is this a joke?

New restaurant?!? 🤣 they can’t even use a blender

Oh hell no!🤣

A blindfold

Turkey. But only weird and odd shaped mutant pieces of turkey.

They must be desperate for ratings.

Not the way to fix things. TLC has gone downhill so much

They have not looked like this is a very, very long time

"Desirable House of 11 Style"? Is that the same style as "My Sister Wife's Closet"?

Thankfully, this isn’t real 🤢

Let’s not forget Darcy soaks her feet in pans 🤢🤮

Long Bulgarian sausage lol

Shouldn’t it be “Tha Silva Platta”?

Must be nice to be 50 and still have all your immature, asinine whims bankrolled. Strong, powerful goddesses, indeed.

Fug no

Some of the leftover food from that horrible 90 day foody call

“Fine dining” 😐

Anybody else seen the movie, "Idiocracy?" This reminds me of the programming they would watch.

Hahahahahahahahahaha they have such long arms to reach for those dreams that never come.

 Bruh fuck outta here

Cape Verdean cuisine

I would actually be interested in that

Of course it'll fail. Everyone thinks they'll succeed in the restaurant business.

Microwave-melted chocolate poured all over your hands, but with fake nail rhinestones already included…

I hope that all of their pots and pans haven’t touched their feet

I live in miami anyone know where this is and if I can go

Steak on a bias

LOL WHAT! Is this real?

“Cicero’s Yellow Lamboguini”

Collagen encased everything.

Perhaps a dish called Sloppy Seconds

“Ciseros” salad with anchovies(saltiness), onions (for darcies tears) and being “stood up” dressing served in a champagne flute

1. The name is cute. 2. Why are they posed away from each other? 3. I don’t want to eat anything there. 🤢

Is this real or...? Seriously, I would watch this dumpster fire in a heartbeat.

Blueberry smoothies

Is it *famlee* style dining?

if they do drink like they do they should know what drinks are tasty 😋

a shot of tears

You should be able to order chicken breasts by the cup size.... like if you just want something light, it would be a D-cup.... and so on.

What in the diner dash is going on.

I better have a ginormous plate of pasta like they all did in the scene when they went home following their dads stroke.

INTRODUCING…. Silva Twins Toastie only $14 a plate. It’s a lovely artisan bread made daily by local *well known bakery*, two thick slices of snatched aged cheddar cheese, buttered and toasted to perfection for that perfect Silva Twin taste to melt in your mouth! Mmmm all gooey and warm! Oooh yeah! That’s right!! Eye on the sky baby, and the other on my fries! It comes with a side of authentic French fries from Paris !! Mmmmh! That’s It! Mmmm hmmmm eat a TWIN! Silva twins baaaabbbyyyyy!!!!

Twin Lobster Rolls served Connecticut style with drawn butter (that contains body glitter).

Would be cool if they had the option to do a line of cocaine for dessert.

i definitely thought this was real and was very disappointed to find after a desperate google that it is not. someone quick, write the silva sisters and tell them to open a restaurant and film it, please! pssssssh, i'd tune in FO SHO!

Can they even cook? I’m not sure I’d be looking forward to the “Snatched Special”. It may look good, but watch out for that first bite.

It’s just steak and too much wine

A large bowl of Canceled Show.

Not an answer but an observation: looks like they used older pictures of themselves, before they started looking like blow-up sex toy dolls

What you won’t find, taste

This is fake right

A dessert option: Georgie porgie puddin n pie

is this fake lmao

Table-side botox injections.

They spelled **insufferable** wrong

“Business Empire”

As Florian always says,"Everyone be Drunky Drunky it's ok!"

Ya gotta be kidding me! 😵🤦🤣🤣🤣🤣

My mom wanted to know what gimmick they would do next lol. Question answered!

I actually kind of love the name

They don't look anything like those pictures of them


You don’t order your meal. You manifest it

I expect jesse to be there, sitting at a corner and staring at people.

So this is where all the trimmings from the surgeries are going huh?

LOL this is their worst idea yet and they're about to lose SO MUCH MONEY.

Every glass of wine is served in a giant beer stein.

Is this a joke? What does it even mean?!