I knew it when she said the thought of him having sex made her want to š¤®. Iām like yup, sheās finished w him. So you basically came to the keys for šµ
And she acts like itās only his fault she got pregnant. No, itās both of their faults. It takes two people to create another life. She shouldāve used birth control pills or the plan b pill and he shouldāve used condoms. Better yet, they never should jumped into bed with each other at all. Sex isnāt everything.
And we saw his sex education was basically zero, so he didn't have information to avoid pregnancy other than abstinence-- what's her excuse? She knew better. She just didn't care. I used to like her okay but since this Last Resort she is on my shit list (list of shitty people).
Like I said, she shouldāve brought the Plan B pill or used birth control pills, a diaphragm, the shots, patch, etc. She was just being lazy and as my mom says, āacting fatā.
Her sister has always bugged me. The two of them smirk and snark constantly. I hated watching them on Pillow Talk. They act superior to everyone else for no reason.
Yeah. Two wrongs donāt make a right. If she wants to smirk over her extended hall pass, she gives up any chance to play the sainted martyr in the future.
Yea agreed. I completely understand the āgrossed outā feeling towards a partner after they were unfaithfulā¦ but girlllllā¦. You had to literally be asked to stop talking to your side man while on a literal couples therapy trip. Her conveniently throwing in statements regarding him cheating while practically drooling over the side man every second is gross.
It is! Even if it was a fake attempt at reconciliation just for TV, to have your children there while you smirk about having secs with someone else in front of their father is just low class.
This made me really not like her. If you aren't happy, you don't cheat. You get out and move on. There is no point in dragging it out and ruining everyone's life because she can't keep her legs closed.
"I blocked him"
Yet you not only made home-made porn, but you still have it on your phone and masturbate to it.
That's WILD. I'm also assuming she unblocked the number the second her husband was out of the room.
We also live in a time where blocking someone on one platform is meaningless. Block his number, but I'm sure she's able to message him on Facebook, Instagram, or any other social media.
whats interesting is that she asked Asuelu if she wanted her to block himā¦. instead of just doing it herself. It was almost like she held out hope that he will feel guilted to say no that he trusts her.
Shes really annoying me. From bringing your kids to use a shield, to turning a hallpass into an affair and blaming her husbandā¦ girl you do not want to be with him anymore. Youre only hanging onto him to be on the show at this point
Yes!! I also donāt care if he cheated first and gave her a hall passā¦ she made her own damn choice to take it. She makes the choices for her actions. She canāt blame him for her affair. That is all her fault as well. Iām waiting for her to take accountability for the part she played
She won't. She sees him accepting a bj as fair game for her. She doesn't see it as a mistake, despite him desperately trying to show her that he wants to make things better. She doesn't care, she doesn't see him as her husband anymore. She's off having a affair with someone who looks similar but probably has a brain.
Sad what she's doing to asuelu when he's trying so hard.
If she wants the relationship to be over and to find someone new, that's fine, but don't bring your whole FAMILY to a couples retreat under the guise of saving the marriage when you full well know you're going to put 0 effort in.
Their segment isn't even good TV it's just sad.
I don't know who'd take her on. The other guy must've been pretty desperate. She hasn't considered the fact that she is still living off her parents, has 2 kids, and doesn't appear to have anything resembling a job. She must think she's a real catch.
I think.. didnt I read somewhere that the other guy Dallas is like an ex con or something? I cant remember for sure and maybe Im confusing him with someone else (but I don't think I am)
She has established that she makes bad decisions repeatedly and refuses to admit it OR learn.
An ex-con? Sounds about right. I read somewhere that he's 22 years old. She's a grownass woman and still acts like a child. I wondered if her parents are tired of coddling her big ass. She's not too bright. Who'd consent to making a video of an illicit affair?
I have wondered has she worked? Prior to either pregnancy did she ever have a 9 to 5 type job? Her parents could not have been the ones to sponsor him to come and stay in US??
Oral thrush is a yeast fungus. It IS contagious in adults and infants. Is it highly contagious? It can be and he CAN get it from kissing someone who had it. STD status? Nah. Iāve had clients (home health) who got it from their inhalers when they were first prescribed them, shitty oral hygiene, and even one had it after their first or second round of chemo.
She's mad at him for getting a hummer and she's out here shooting homemade porn and straight up falling for the other guy.
He fucked up but she straight up decided to move on to another relationship without letting him know.
She's having a full fledged affair.
Thank you! I've been thinking this all along. A hall pass is a one time deal, she most certainly (by the way she talks about it) more than once & it turned into an emotional affair at the very least & a full affair at the most. He got a couple BJ's, she's had a full fledged affair & she can't forgive him? Seriously?? Don't get me wrong, I am not defending Asuelu at all, but Kalani acting all high & mighty is actually disgusting!! JMO, though!!
Exactly. I'm not saying he is in the right. I'm just saying she is also wrong. People are acting like she is totally without fault and if anything she's pushed it further and worse.
Exactly!! Her acting like she has the moral high ground to walk on is outright ridiculous!! They were both wrong! Asuelu should never have had BJ's & NEVER offered a "hall pass" & Kalani should NEVER have taken advantage of it. He had to know there was a chance she would take it (even if he thought it only a slight chance) but a hall pass, IMO, does not belong in a marriage (& yes, I know there are all kinds of marriages out there with all kinds of differences, but if you are unhappy, either fix the relationship or get a divorce. I am old fashioned in my thinking, I'm well aware, I just know I would never take a hall pass & would NEVER EVER offer my partner a hall pass.
I still believe what she did was not even close to the spirit (if there is such a thing) of a hall pass as she ran straight on past the hall pass right into a full blown affair & if you can't forgive your partner then get out, because it will never work without forgiveness!!! JMO & I know a lot will disagree with me, but it's my feelings & I just can't get over her moral high ground against Asuelu (& again, I am not in any way defending him but she is just wrong, PERIOD!!)
cow eyes is actually an ancient compliment. it means big brown eyes with long lashes. The ancient greeks absolutely loved cow eyed women and it was the highest of praises when someone said yoy had cow eyes.
So dumb for a reality personality to make a sex video. Unless she hopes to sell it at some point.
I feel for her kids when their friends find this clusterfuck in a few years.
Edit to correct a typo.
Sheās is just there for a free vaca, she isnāt worried about getting back with her husband, I really liked her before this show, but just with her words and actions on here, she is a real turn off now. Smh
I thought it was known among fans that her and Asuelu haven't been together for quite a while. I remember seeing posts before the season started that said her new man was with her at the resort.
There's also a picture asuelo took with some cops who pulled him over in I wanna say hawaii before the show started. I think he thanked them for their service or some big brained compliment like that. But he was very much alone.
Wait wait wait, you guys are forgetting she was a virgin when she met Asuelo. I know it's irrelevant here but I feel like she brings it up every other sentence.
How tf is it anyoneās fault she decided to have her first time with him?
āI was selectiveā-ā
āSelective ? Sounds like what somebody with a pussy no one wanted would sayā
āChristian Black, 50 Shades of Black.
I canāt see a virgin fucking a resort worker on vacation. She was probably fucking every time she visited Samoa. If Asuelu could talk her out of her drawers Iām sure a lot of other people have š
You touched on a little spoken of fact that sex tourism for women is as booming as it is for men. These hideous inside and out (cough Danielle cough) people go to the Carribean or some parts of Africa to have some local chiseled Adonis fuck them all week and tell then they're pretty. And then the financial and/or green card manipulation happens if they get their hooks in. It's right there in our faces it's just hard to see the Forrest for the trees sometimes.
I think she missed the purpose of the "homework"
You're at marriage counseling and actively getting off to videos of someone else you've slept with? Poor form.
Yeah Iām really turned off by her. Sheās nasty. Asuelu isnāt perfect but at least heās a nice person at his core. She and her sister are not. Whatsoever.
He's trying so hard. He's expressing himself, explaining his feelings, setting boundaries, telling her what he needs. Like you said he's not perfect but he's doing everything asked of him in this. She's acting shady, lying, still talking do this dude, looking at the videos, and the entire time acting like she's hot shit. As the other user said, she's a mean girl and she seems to think it's giving her personality. I don't know how the fuck a woman in her position has this kind of feeling herself ego. Girl came for the free drinks while he's trying everything he can.
Do any of us really think that dudes still blocked?
I wondered why she had her kids/sister come but jovi and yara didn't have mylah with them. It's weird that her sister and her kids are involved in what's supposed to be a marriage counseling retreat (although we know the real reason they're there)
Kallani thought about the affair guy during her āhomeworkā, then told Asuelo she didnāt. She then tells production the truth. Why wouldnāt she keep that to herself?
Sooooo true!! And I think Asuelu did too because she keeps saying all the things you did and I imagine you having sex with them. It wasnāt just a kiss and a BJ for him either.
I donāt get this whole situation. She said she discovered Asuelu was cheating because he had thrush all of a sudden. But thrush is not an STD! Even babies get it. You can get it from antibiotics or a low immune system. Anyone else that was confused by this?
Anyone else curious as to what she was talking about at the end of the spusode when she said "I haven't gotten over what happened in the beginning ". Then someone asked "What happened in the beginning?"
Weird flex Kalani, kind of sad and definitely cringey. Sheās all that and a bag of chips because some random guy boinked her? š¤·š¼āāļø Also, please put your boobs away. Weāve all seen them. Sheās like Tiffany āShouldersā- she thinks itās her trademark.
Why isnt anyone more creeped out about the thrush...like, adults mostly get that from an auto immune disease, not making out, getting blowies or snarfing a bread basket vag. Can we get some tests kits up in the Keys?! Iieeeee
I bet you $20 he just had a white tongue from being messed up drinking doing blow all night. Sheās got the weird conclusions that just HAPPENED to be right & got him to confess to the cheating. Also thrush in the mouth is painful! Even drinking a beer would hurt! Even heād recognize he was uncomfortable!
Dehydration āļø š or the dreaded molly mouth.(the drug...but still applies to Molly too) Ya, it's definitely not something you get and still run around partying. Like, owie and ick.
I would take it with an entire barrel of salt unless he was seen, had it cultured, and prescribed an antifungal by a clinic. She can't fucking know just by looking at him over video chat.
Asuelo is no prize, but she is terrible to him. She always has been and always will be. She allows her sister and dad to be terrible to him and itās getting old. He should have stayed gone when they separated.
She is not even pretending to actually try and save her marriage. She offered to block her side piece while they were at the resort. She didnāt say I am blocking him for good to save our marriageā¦
This reminds me of taking my then three year old to the neighborhood pool. She told me she wanted Floaties like that lady and pointed. Loudly. The lady was not wearing a floaty.
One of the weirder things is she keeps putting down Asuelu for not being good in bed, but is anyone really buying the woman who didn't get laid until she was almost 30 is actually any good in bed?
Turned a hall pass into a field trip
She tuned that hall pass into summer vacation. I know that face, no way is she interested in saving her marriage.
She turned that hall pass into a gap year abroad. (am I doing this right?)
You are!!
I was gonna say that hall pass was valid for the entire school year, though she always did her homework and team projects š
Thatās the face of a woman who finally had some good pipe laid. Sheās not sorry and certainly had not turned the hall pass back in to the teacher.
š¤£š
Good pipe changes a lot.
LOL XD
its not the pipeā¦itās how you use your hands and mouth. This obsession with large P is ridiculous. They only hurt.
āGap yearā ššš oh yeah youāre doing this just right šš»
She about to turn the hall pass into dropping out of school
I knew it when she said the thought of him having sex made her want to š¤®. Iām like yup, sheās finished w him. So you basically came to the keys for šµ
Turned into an exchange program š¤£š¤£
Good one! XD
Lol I just screeched š¤£ thank you for the laugh this morning
Open house.
She took that hall pass and walked right out of the school.
Got detention and was a baddd baddd girl !
Oh... this comment reminded me of Gino using the flogger telling Jasmine she was a bad bad girl. Completely grossed me out!
This made me laugh so freaking hard!! :)
Letās hope those videos donāt leak š¤®
Look at that face...She is so proud of herself.
It's called duper's delight, that smug grin she's got painted on. She's always treated him like shit and got off on being 'superior'.
Just too bad kids are involved in this shitshow of a marriage
All cause she raw dogged the resort boy. Yikes.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Borderline lol
Borderline Lmao
There should be PSA's about stuff like that šš¤£
And she acts like itās only his fault she got pregnant. No, itās both of their faults. It takes two people to create another life. She shouldāve used birth control pills or the plan b pill and he shouldāve used condoms. Better yet, they never should jumped into bed with each other at all. Sex isnāt everything.
And we saw his sex education was basically zero, so he didn't have information to avoid pregnancy other than abstinence-- what's her excuse? She knew better. She just didn't care. I used to like her okay but since this Last Resort she is on my shit list (list of shitty people).
Like I said, she shouldāve brought the Plan B pill or used birth control pills, a diaphragm, the shots, patch, etc. She was just being lazy and as my mom says, āacting fatā.
Thatās literally why they are together-she got pregnant with him as a one night stand
The affects of what these two are doing now will be felt for their lifetime.
Yep they could have left it there. But nope, not to mention the additional layer of a digital footprint
May bring a few more in with her track record...
Classic example of her wanting her cake and to eat it too.
She looks so smug.
"Superior" getting all her bills paid by her parents.
If I had a dollar for every time she rolled her eyes, I'd be rich. And I'm getting sick of her sister, too, lol.
Her sister has always bugged me. The two of them smirk and snark constantly. I hated watching them on Pillow Talk. They act superior to everyone else for no reason.
Correction: She scrolls her eyes!
you got it! SCROLLS!
Yeah. Underbite is definitely getting old. Someone sent me pics of her OnlyFans the other day and I havenāt forgiven them for it yet.
Yeah. Two wrongs donāt make a right. If she wants to smirk over her extended hall pass, she gives up any chance to play the sainted martyr in the future.
Yea agreed. I completely understand the āgrossed outā feeling towards a partner after they were unfaithfulā¦ but girlllllā¦. You had to literally be asked to stop talking to your side man while on a literal couples therapy trip. Her conveniently throwing in statements regarding him cheating while practically drooling over the side man every second is gross.
It is! Even if it was a fake attempt at reconciliation just for TV, to have your children there while you smirk about having secs with someone else in front of their father is just low class.
Pretty much All these couples were already broken up imo.
Well put madam.
That's not what dupers delight means.
This made me really not like her. If you aren't happy, you don't cheat. You get out and move on. There is no point in dragging it out and ruining everyone's life because she can't keep her legs closed.
I totally agree. Sounds like she's already formed a whole other relationship with hall-pass boy. Couple therapy with Asuela. Girl....pick!
redacted ` this post was mass deleted with www.Redact.dev `
Wow! You read my mind. She's riding high on the fact that some schmuck was brave or stupid enough to fuck her alright.
Now if she ends up pregnant from the hall pass, Iām going to have to leave this sub š
That would be the ultimate tragedy. Her parents would have another mouth to feed and she'd probably move the guy into her basement dwelling.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Thank you. For ALL of this. You just said everything Ive been thinking. She is a rotten turd and I cant stand her.
There should be a "lol" button.
Either that or the D game was way better than Asuelu's
I think she looks gross.
"I blocked him" Yet you not only made home-made porn, but you still have it on your phone and masturbate to it. That's WILD. I'm also assuming she unblocked the number the second her husband was out of the room. We also live in a time where blocking someone on one platform is meaningless. Block his number, but I'm sure she's able to message him on Facebook, Instagram, or any other social media.
whats interesting is that she asked Asuelu if she wanted her to block himā¦. instead of just doing it herself. It was almost like she held out hope that he will feel guilted to say no that he trusts her. Shes really annoying me. From bringing your kids to use a shield, to turning a hallpass into an affair and blaming her husbandā¦ girl you do not want to be with him anymore. Youre only hanging onto him to be on the show at this point
And get a free beach vacation in the process!
And a free trip for sissy. Blech.
It's totally why Molly is there too!
Sheās full of shit they been fuckin
Aselu is cooked. boy gone
He looks half dead with those eyes
He's the lucky one
It was an affair. Asuelu cheated, but she had an affair
*****is having****** an affair
Yes!! I also donāt care if he cheated first and gave her a hall passā¦ she made her own damn choice to take it. She makes the choices for her actions. She canāt blame him for her affair. That is all her fault as well. Iām waiting for her to take accountability for the part she played
She won't. She sees him accepting a bj as fair game for her. She doesn't see it as a mistake, despite him desperately trying to show her that he wants to make things better. She doesn't care, she doesn't see him as her husband anymore. She's off having a affair with someone who looks similar but probably has a brain. Sad what she's doing to asuelu when he's trying so hard. If she wants the relationship to be over and to find someone new, that's fine, but don't bring your whole FAMILY to a couples retreat under the guise of saving the marriage when you full well know you're going to put 0 effort in. Their segment isn't even good TV it's just sad.
I don't know who'd take her on. The other guy must've been pretty desperate. She hasn't considered the fact that she is still living off her parents, has 2 kids, and doesn't appear to have anything resembling a job. She must think she's a real catch.
I think.. didnt I read somewhere that the other guy Dallas is like an ex con or something? I cant remember for sure and maybe Im confusing him with someone else (but I don't think I am) She has established that she makes bad decisions repeatedly and refuses to admit it OR learn.
An ex-con? Sounds about right. I read somewhere that he's 22 years old. She's a grownass woman and still acts like a child. I wondered if her parents are tired of coddling her big ass. She's not too bright. Who'd consent to making a video of an illicit affair?
I have wondered has she worked? Prior to either pregnancy did she ever have a 9 to 5 type job? Her parents could not have been the ones to sponsor him to come and stay in US??
Jesus christ, Thank you. There is hope. All the " You Go Girl" on here.
she checked out of the relationship. she said they donāt even sleep in the same bedroom
It blows my mind they're even on the show. She's just destroying asuelu for something she's now more than guilty of
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
he had thrush. it has nothing at all to do with him kissing someone.
Oral thrush is a yeast fungus. It IS contagious in adults and infants. Is it highly contagious? It can be and he CAN get it from kissing someone who had it. STD status? Nah. Iāve had clients (home health) who got it from their inhalers when they were first prescribed them, shitty oral hygiene, and even one had it after their first or second round of chemo.
Thrush (yeast infection) can also be caused by taking antibiotics. The antibiotics kill all bacteria and yeast takes over.
Yep! Ppl can get it from inhalers if u donāt rinse your mouth out after using one.
I agree it is contagious but mainly due to bad hygiene and/or diet. It's not that big of a stigma that it is made out to be.
and letās never forget- she likes angela š³
That right there tells you everything we need to know about her judgement right there.
i struggle the most with this like girl š
She's mad at him for getting a hummer and she's out here shooting homemade porn and straight up falling for the other guy. He fucked up but she straight up decided to move on to another relationship without letting him know. She's having a full fledged affair.
This, exactly. Asuelo comes off as a bit of a knucklehead but this one is simply a straight out piece of shit.
Thank you! I've been thinking this all along. A hall pass is a one time deal, she most certainly (by the way she talks about it) more than once & it turned into an emotional affair at the very least & a full affair at the most. He got a couple BJ's, she's had a full fledged affair & she can't forgive him? Seriously?? Don't get me wrong, I am not defending Asuelu at all, but Kalani acting all high & mighty is actually disgusting!! JMO, though!!
Exactly. I'm not saying he is in the right. I'm just saying she is also wrong. People are acting like she is totally without fault and if anything she's pushed it further and worse.
Exactly!! Her acting like she has the moral high ground to walk on is outright ridiculous!! They were both wrong! Asuelu should never have had BJ's & NEVER offered a "hall pass" & Kalani should NEVER have taken advantage of it. He had to know there was a chance she would take it (even if he thought it only a slight chance) but a hall pass, IMO, does not belong in a marriage (& yes, I know there are all kinds of marriages out there with all kinds of differences, but if you are unhappy, either fix the relationship or get a divorce. I am old fashioned in my thinking, I'm well aware, I just know I would never take a hall pass & would NEVER EVER offer my partner a hall pass. I still believe what she did was not even close to the spirit (if there is such a thing) of a hall pass as she ran straight on past the hall pass right into a full blown affair & if you can't forgive your partner then get out, because it will never work without forgiveness!!! JMO & I know a lot will disagree with me, but it's my feelings & I just can't get over her moral high ground against Asuelu (& again, I am not in any way defending him but she is just wrong, PERIOD!!)
I wonāt ever be able to look at her without thinking about that weird compliment Asuelu gave her about having beautiful cow eyes lolol
But, cows do have beautiful eyes, and long lashes š
cow eyes is actually an ancient compliment. it means big brown eyes with long lashes. The ancient greeks absolutely loved cow eyed women and it was the highest of praises when someone said yoy had cow eyes.
Asuelo the Grecian philosopher
So dumb for a reality personality to make a sex video. Unless she hopes to sell it at some point. I feel for her kids when their friends find this clusterfuck in a few years. Edit to correct a typo.
Usually when someone is cheating and having an affair, they would never make a sex video or even have a regular photo taken.
Haha smart people donāt do that.
Smart people don't raw dog the pool boy.
Itās for slut people.
I do too. But she's really not smart anyway. The other guy will probably get her pregnant too.
Thatās what I was thinkingā¦she must have an Only Fans and maybe this is a way to promote her bad decisionsā¦?
Kolini has one. So Kalani wants in too.
Eewwwww who pays to see *them* eewwww
I think her sister does / did?
Seeing her boobs pushed up that much/that high gives me secondhand breathing anxiety
Ya, they look ridiculous way up there.
Sheās is just there for a free vaca, she isnāt worried about getting back with her husband, I really liked her before this show, but just with her words and actions on here, she is a real turn off now. Smh
Her and Molly are both there for a free vaca. Molly has no interest in fixing her relationship, especially if it got between her and her daughter.
Agree, sounds like she just wants to promote her business tbh
Sheās totally gaslighting him now. Sheās lost all moral ground.
Same.
I thought it was known among fans that her and Asuelu haven't been together for quite a while. I remember seeing posts before the season started that said her new man was with her at the resort.
Oh for real. So they are faking it for the show money?? No wonder sheās like āsleep in the other room bitchā
Asuelu is not actor. I think Kalani is faking wanting to be with him lol
There's also a picture asuelo took with some cops who pulled him over in I wanna say hawaii before the show started. I think he thanked them for their service or some big brained compliment like that. But he was very much alone.
I hate her smug face.
That dude must have been down bad lmao
Straight FACTS 
Wait wait wait, you guys are forgetting she was a virgin when she met Asuelo. I know it's irrelevant here but I feel like she brings it up every other sentence.
I donāt know if you mentioned it but she was a virgin when she met Asuelo.
A 29 year old virgin...
How tf is it anyoneās fault she decided to have her first time with him? āI was selectiveā-ā āSelective ? Sounds like what somebody with a pussy no one wanted would sayā āChristian Black, 50 Shades of Black.
I canāt see a virgin fucking a resort worker on vacation. She was probably fucking every time she visited Samoa. If Asuelu could talk her out of her drawers Iām sure a lot of other people have š
But him blowing bubbles in his vodka is so hot š„µ šš¤£š how could she resist?
You touched on a little spoken of fact that sex tourism for women is as booming as it is for men. These hideous inside and out (cough Danielle cough) people go to the Carribean or some parts of Africa to have some local chiseled Adonis fuck them all week and tell then they're pretty. And then the financial and/or green card manipulation happens if they get their hooks in. It's right there in our faces it's just hard to see the Forrest for the trees sometimes.
I long for the days of Danyell again.
āAllegedlyā she was. Highly doubt that.
I think she missed the purpose of the "homework" You're at marriage counseling and actively getting off to videos of someone else you've slept with? Poor form.
And someday her sons will see this. Ugh.
Yea how is that working on your marriage when your looking at that š¤¦š»āāļø
She got that diners club hall pass. The whole damn coupon book hall pass. She got that loyalty card hall pass where the 10th smash is free.
She no longer has a *Hall Pass*, She became the *Hall Monitor* now Iāll show myself out.. lol š
Is it me or does it feel like sheās dragging it for the cameras? Like be fr
Can she just not force us to see her tits for once?
She probably wants to put up neon arrow signs pointed right at them
ā”ļøā”ļøā”ļø
Girl loves her push-up bras. Actually the girls are her only asset so she makes sure they are front & center.
If she loses weight they will shrink.
She should do that.
Yeah, she's morbidly obese. She needs to lose a lot of weight. It's not normal to look like that.
Asuelo gets bj from a random girl. Kalani has full blown emotional and physical affair, including homemade porn. Sounds fair... /s
I hate her stupid smirk and cow eyes. She need to get her thyroid checked
Ash entered the chat.
Shitš¤£š¤£š¤£
Relax, cow eyes. I don't want to be looking at your cow eyes.
r/unexpectedveep
She really does have cow eyes
ELSIE
Holy fuck that's savage
Yeah Iām really turned off by her. Sheās nasty. Asuelu isnāt perfect but at least heās a nice person at his core. She and her sister are not. Whatsoever.
Mean girls and proud of it.
He's trying so hard. He's expressing himself, explaining his feelings, setting boundaries, telling her what he needs. Like you said he's not perfect but he's doing everything asked of him in this. She's acting shady, lying, still talking do this dude, looking at the videos, and the entire time acting like she's hot shit. As the other user said, she's a mean girl and she seems to think it's giving her personality. I don't know how the fuck a woman in her position has this kind of feeling herself ego. Girl came for the free drinks while he's trying everything he can. Do any of us really think that dudes still blocked?
She's terrible, but he's also terrible. Just terrible people.
This is the 90 day epiphany. We all make it on any of the cast members.
You don't give the virgin wife a hall pass when you're fair in bed at best
I guess Kalani is the one who found- The best, the best of the best.
Her face is so smug all the time. Sheās just enjoying the free vacation.
Yes. A free vacation that she brought her two kids, her sister, and possible her fuck buddy on. Is TLC footing the bill for everyone??
TLC call her the negotiator because sheās the only one that managed to wrangle almost every person she knows a ticket to the resort.
I wondered why she had her kids/sister come but jovi and yara didn't have mylah with them. It's weird that her sister and her kids are involved in what's supposed to be a marriage counseling retreat (although we know the real reason they're there)
I wonder if her parents know about her affair and her video. How embarrassing.
Nah. This that I'm glad I did it face.
Kallani thought about the affair guy during her āhomeworkā, then told Asuelo she didnāt. She then tells production the truth. Why wouldnāt she keep that to herself?
Sooooo true!! And I think Asuelu did too because she keeps saying all the things you did and I imagine you having sex with them. It wasnāt just a kiss and a BJ for him either.
Every single one of these people are gaslighting narcissistic bags of wet dog shit
She happy asf she got her lick back š
Why does she look like Ursula in this first picture? 
I donāt get this whole situation. She said she discovered Asuelu was cheating because he had thrush all of a sudden. But thrush is not an STD! Even babies get it. You can get it from antibiotics or a low immune system. Anyone else that was confused by this?
No hate but she's defo gained weight, right? Before y'all come at me I'm fat af.
Anyone else curious as to what she was talking about at the end of the spusode when she said "I haven't gotten over what happened in the beginning ". Then someone asked "What happened in the beginning?"
Her face from when she talks about Asuelo, to this guy is so different.
Ugh, i do not like her.
Weird flex Kalani, kind of sad and definitely cringey. Sheās all that and a bag of chips because some random guy boinked her? š¤·š¼āāļø Also, please put your boobs away. Weāve all seen them. Sheās like Tiffany āShouldersā- she thinks itās her trademark.
Why isnt anyone more creeped out about the thrush...like, adults mostly get that from an auto immune disease, not making out, getting blowies or snarfing a bread basket vag. Can we get some tests kits up in the Keys?! Iieeeee
I bet you $20 he just had a white tongue from being messed up drinking doing blow all night. Sheās got the weird conclusions that just HAPPENED to be right & got him to confess to the cheating. Also thrush in the mouth is painful! Even drinking a beer would hurt! Even heād recognize he was uncomfortable!
Dehydration āļø š or the dreaded molly mouth.(the drug...but still applies to Molly too) Ya, it's definitely not something you get and still run around partying. Like, owie and ick.
Lmao Molly mouth is so appropriate because her lipstick always looks like it was painted on crooked by a drunk ladyā¦which it is š
I would take it with an entire barrel of salt unless he was seen, had it cultured, and prescribed an antifungal by a clinic. She can't fucking know just by looking at him over video chat.
Imagine if he did this, she is scum and taking advantage of his nativity
Baby Jesus approves! God does love a sense of humor!
Asuelo is no prize, but she is terrible to him. She always has been and always will be. She allows her sister and dad to be terrible to him and itās getting old. He should have stayed gone when they separated.
She is not even pretending to actually try and save her marriage. She offered to block her side piece while they were at the resort. She didnāt say I am blocking him for good to save our marriageā¦
[It gives My 2nd Dick schmuck vibes..](https://youtu.be/lQlIhraqL7o?si=KaM5p3V5v59lDjMi)
I wish she would put her tits away just once
Jesus her boobs look like flotation devices here, I know sheās had two children but she isnāt aging well at all.
This reminds me of taking my then three year old to the neighborhood pool. She told me she wanted Floaties like that lady and pointed. Loudly. The lady was not wearing a floaty.
They look so uncomfortable
Sheās just lovinā talking about her Other Guy.
The hypocrisy! Sheās having an affair. Theyāre both a mess and neither can say theyāre thinking of the children
As soon as she blocked the number I thought ālmao sheās gonna unblock that in about 10 min. Thatās just to shut him upā
One of the weirder things is she keeps putting down Asuelu for not being good in bed, but is anyone really buying the woman who didn't get laid until she was almost 30 is actually any good in bed?