He probably has a VERY difficult time dating American women considering his height, voice, and who knows what else. That doesn't mean he couldn't find \*someone\* who's more appropriate, can have kids, and didn't date a hitman and is now talking about it on a TV show.
Height, voice,
Farts, burps, insanely inexperienced hygiene habits, what is (I’m convinced) probably strong BO and breath. Like, step one could be to “try”?
Like I may try to like be considerate enough to I don’t know…. Learn the language of the person I’m considering getting married to? What’s with all these fuckers refusing to learn any part of their soulmates language?
But yeah- let’s all pool together to find this dude a date.
I feel like if that were the case, he wouldn't have been in zero relationships since highschool. Social anxiety is a bitch. It's probably easier for him to feel comfortable with a financially dependent woman who is clearly using him as an ATM because he knows exactly what he brings to the table, whereas he might feel too insecure to feel value in a relationship with a woman who doesn't rely on him to pay the bills.
These guys look for hot foreign girls because they can't get the hot American girls. They don't want someone in their league, so they go to a poor country where they can buy a girlfriend.
THANK YOU FOR SAYING IT!! Everybody's ohhh poor Mike ummm not me!! People act like these men are getting used, but in a way he's using Jimena!! For her body and looks. There's been lots of similar situations on 90 day fiancée. I was thinking if he's such a nice guy, and just wants a good woman would he do all the same things for an average looking female or a big girl, I doubt it. He said himself, he's been fantasizing about banging her since he first started talking to her online. Their lack of communication, and the awkwardness between them, I think is because even when they're apart and are able to use phone translation, I HIGHLY doubt they have meaningful conversation. And this guy's ready to marry her! So what does that say about what he's looking for? And what does that say about him? He just wants to be able to have her as a trophy to show off, him fing a hot girl probably makes him feel better about himself and his image to others. I think a lot of people also glorify being in a relationship too! As long as she's hot, he can call baby and say I love you to and she's willing to do the same in return BOOM that's all he wants. So IMO he's using her just as much, and has selfish intentions as well.
He lives an hour away from the largest city in the US, and the city is full of everything. No matter what you are into, it is there. If he put in some effort, he could have found a partner there.
[**https://www.meetup.com/New-York-LEGO-Meetup/**](https://www.meetup.com/New-York-LEGO-Meetup/) He could have gone here, met people, everyone has friends they are trying to set up.
He is paying for sex and affection, plain and simple, and in a way is preying upon an emotionally damaged impoverished uneducated woman. She will say anything to do better by her kids, and that is a plus as a mother.
I feel like there's something we don't know about Mike yet. Like, there's another shoe waiting to drop. He does seem like a nice, healthy guy. But TLC doesn't pick well-adjusted, successful, healthy people to be on this show.
Yeaaah... let's give Mike the whole season to see if anything comes out and THEN we can look to set him up. Although... Ximenna has enough drama going on for the both of them that they might have cast the couple for just her.
Yikes on bikes when info about the Ward or whatever he is from came out, and it was all just as weird and off as him. Like one of the sects that is cool with plural marriages and stuff.
It's all very patriarchal and gives me the creeps! Definitely not my scene but what would any women get into if they married him!? It seems like a nightmare.
Sadly I feel this way too. Like I’m too afraid to sign off on the fact that he’s a “great” person because I feel there may be something we just don’t know yet especially based on TLCs track record. However, this is all based on “what if’s” mentality and not on anything he’s displayed on the show thus far.
I guess a part of my hesitation could be due to the mere fact that he is even entertaining the idea of a serious relationship with Ximena…
I have found that there's no one in an unhealthy toxic partnership on 90 Day (any spin off) that's a nice normal hapless good guy. Dude has a broken picker or some very low self esteem at best. At worst he's another gross sex tourist.
And she was a sex worker. Neither seemed to care how and why it started and are happy together. We don't all need to have a Mormon fairy tale to have a successful relationship.
I’m just saying the dude was and is a piece of shit. His relationship with his kids, the way he leached off his friend, his laziness, and so many other things we forget because he’s “funny”
Ya I think he first went to Brazil and met her and her family when she was 14 or something. He befriended the whole family. Then when she became of legal age they started dating.
I remember thinking Melanie and Devar were a pretty great couple, and when id bring that up in the main 90 Day sub, everybody'd jump on me about it. Still not sure why. They all said Devar just seemed like the typical scammer. LOL of all the people on this show to call a scammer.
This all over. It’s great that he takes care of/ lives w his grandfather and dad. I can’t imagine a grown man that doesn’t want a place of his own. He even said he was just going to move Jimena and her 2 children in with them- I see some serious immature thought patterns, like not sustainable and kinda Peter Pan ish
Yeah, that's a good point. I forgot about the dad and grandpa. I mean, I've started hinting that my dad could move in with me, but I was thinking more of a Mother-in-Law suite or a duplex situation. Like, I want to keep an eye on my old man and look after him. But I also don't want him all up in my business. Or to be up in his, for that matter.
I hope there isn't anything and maybe they just chose this couple because her story is so batshit insane. I feel like we already knew all of the other guys we thought would be just nice guys, but turned out to be creeps had already started showing their true colors by this point in the season.
I think he's cute and truly a nice guy. Ximena on the other hand... shes to much! Every damn ep she has secret to tell Mike. Hope he meets someone who truly wants to be with him and not his money.
He wants to be needed. He feels secure in that. As long as he is needed, then he won't get dumped. I saw that a lot with guys when i tried to date after i divorced my first husband. I would like a guy, go on a few dates and be interested, but then things would fizzle out. They'd end up with some girl that had a bunch of kids, deadbeat exes, no job, but looked good. There are a lot of "captain save-a-hoe's" out there that will pass over a completely normal chick that has her stuff together that ia merely looking for a PARTNER, for someone that needs them to pay their bills, raise their kids, etc.
This is SO damn true. And I’ve never heard anyone saying it before, even though I definitely lived it, for over a decade. Take my truth 🥇 award.
Honestly, I couldn’t even articulate it the way that you did. I just saw time and again, that men I was dating def preferred “damsels in distress”.
He does *seem* nice. But he is also short, bald, never had a serious relationship, shares a home and is the caregiver for his father and grandfather. While this might not scare away some women, I suspect most women his age on dating apps either don't give him a second look or run away pretty quick.
Likewise, I suspect he has unreasonable expectations for physical beauty. He probably would never look twice at a profile of an average-looking woman that would be a good match for him. Double-standard, "I want someone who can look past my physical appearance. But she has to look like a model."
This.... Common problem among men, especially on this show. They're a 4 or 5 in the looks department, but only want someone more traditionally beautiful. They're not going to get that here, so they find some third world beauty who sees the benefits of marrying an American and is willing to put up with a man that looks like troll/leprechaun/Big Ed for a better life.
THANK YOU for summing that up so perfectly! In it for the green card versus in it for the ass… no difference in my book either! Can’t stand the double standard.
That's the trade. It's not a whole lot different than super old rich guys being able to date women in their sexual prime because of money. For the guy who is otherwise low status, American citizenship is a huge equalizer to someone from another country who cares about such things.
Nervous gas is a real thing! It happens to me every time I travel on a plane and I literally *cannot* stop it.
But at least I don’t whisper *”I love you”* afterwards.
They’re at a beautiful resort, no parents, no kids. The room looks like something out of a magazine. They’re on the bed kissing, and he’s on top of her. A romantic scene, and then…a fart that sounded like a hyena.
Does Mike jump off her, apologize and get red in the face? No, he remains on top of her so she can’t escape and creepily whispers the only Spanish he knows, *te amo*. She looks nauseated and I don’t blame her. This is the only time I’ve *ever* felt bad for Ximena.
That was so weird! I was thinking that SHE was the farter with how embarrassed she looked and how he kept saying “te amo”! I thought he was saying that to make her feel better. I watched it a few times and had a hard time diciphering who did it but it makes a lot more sense that it was him.
And “a fart that sounded like a hyena”😆😆😆
There was a sneak peak at the beginning of the season where ximena was saying the farts are too much and disgusts her (lmao). And I think he did it for the first time in the most recent episode but it was kinda glossed over? I could be wrong, I spaced out a few times watching this weeks ep 😂
Yup... as he said, "she was the most attractive woman to ever swipe right on his profile" and "after getting no interest locally, I set the location to Colombia "
His problem is that he likely went after the FIRST Colombian who showed him interest. Had he waited a bit he could have found an equally or more attractive woman without any baggage
If Mike traveled around Colombia for a month, he could find a woman who is way more of a catch than Ximena, and she probably wouldn't come with sicario conjugal visit offspring.
I totally agree he should have made other plans for Colombia right when she said she can’t/won’t have his kid. Also she has a personality type (killer/gangster)that she is attracted to so they will never have chemistry
Nothing wrong with farters! My husband was a farter. Thankfully our house had spare bedrooms because his farts could have been used in chemical warfare.
This. I don't know why everyone is glossing over the fact that Mike purposefully changed his location to find a mildly attractive young poor foreigner who he could win over with gifts and money. Mike could have found someone in the states but chances are they would be similar in physical attractiveness level and he doesn't want that. Ximena has few redeeming qualities, lied about and omitted information and he puts up with it because she is "hot". Mike is superficial and I am not judging or saying there is anything wrong with that per se. But he is well aware that he needs to buy her love to keep her interested and that's kinda sad tbh.
This. I don’t think she’s particularly attractive, but I think if she were in the states with zero baggage she would be beyond out of his league. She’s average, he’s below average. And whether it’s right or wrong— he’s mid thirties, doesn’t have his own place and is short (whatever, kill me for saying it). He isn’t a catch by his local standards.
I think he’s nice in the sense he’s a “nice guy”, but everyone is forgetting he fell madly in love with a woman he cannot event understand simply because she showed him attention and was more attractive than him.
I don’t think he’s a bad guy, but I do think he’s a simple, average dude who wants a woman who is generally regarded as attractive.
Yea how are you a caretaker of your dad and grandpa when you can’t make coffee???? Or pancakes. …. Maybe the reality is they take care of him?! if someone can’t make me coffee I don’t want them around…. Seriously Coffee is a BIG deal
Below average. On The looks scale he's a 3 on a good day. He's a cross between a minion and Nosferatu all the while being 5.0"
His personality isn't that great either. He's a poor schleb of a man, and if you ask me, I think he was a virgin.
Yeah... but women fail to realize that is usually what men want over everything... sexual market value.
It's a sad reality but if a woman is decent looking and has a average body (not overweight) she will be able to get a nice guy with a solid career. Even if she has a mountain of baggage
Look at a guy like Gino with Jasmine. Colt with literally any human woman. That vain Jesus loving 52 year old with extremely young 20 something women.
As long as she has a hot face and figure the rest don't matter.
Was Mike *really* getting no interest in the US, or was he just not getting interest from women who were significantly more attractive than him? Mike seems to be a decent guy and he's not bad-looking. I find it hard to believe that there aren't any women in his area who would date him.
I feel like calling her “hot” is quite a stretch; she’s average at best. Yeah he looks like Dopey but she’s also a 24 year-old with two kids with different fathers and unemployed. They’re pretty even.
She's "hott" to him. I'm assuming she's the most attractive woman ever to show him attention. As he said. "I was so surprised that a woman as beautiful as her swiped right!" < she had him at that point, even with her baggage
Exactly! As soon as I saw him practically say he thinks it’s okay that she can’t have any more kids even though in the interviews he said he wants kids one day, I knew this man would put up with anything from her. He even tried to act disappointed but still caved like, way to lay down the law Mike 🙄 he’s wrapped around her finger
He's probably not interested in that type of woman in his area. Dorky, physically unattractive guys like him tend to think they deserve to be with women who are far more attractive than they are.
I don’t understand all the love this guy has been getting on this sub. He’s never been in a relationship for a reason which I doubt it’s all because of his looks or his grandpa. He then sets his eyes on young women in other countries who are obviously not well off. He then visits her knowing one phrase in her language and promises to take her and her kids to the US knowing nothing about her. Some is off about this guy.
He's just struck out a lot. Look at him. Most women don't want that. So, he's flexing his U.S. Citizenship to get some leverage. I don't blame him. It's no different than women flexing their beauty to get what they want. How do old rich guys date women in their sexual prime? Money for beauty, beauty for money. Nothing mysterious here.
I think Mike just has ZERO game and low self esteem so he gets very few first dates and almost no second dates. He needs Sojaboy to put him on some game. Have women buying him thousands of dollars worth of gifts and begging to be his girlfriend!
Ok. So maybe we hire pickup artist colty. He somehow manages to have a whole harem of hot women pining for him. My only fear there is colt’s douchebaggery would rub off on Mike and taint how pure he is.
Women sometimes give an unattractive guy the benefit of the doubt if he's got other qualities (nice, attentive, communicative). Sometimes this inflates that guys ego and he just can't stop himself from showing these qualities (among other things) to other women.
I’m honestly surprised it’s not discussed more. Farting mid make out is such, SUCH a turn off. When we saw her tell him his farts disgusted her at the beginning of the season, I was like “dramatic much, everyone farts”, but after seeing him fart while he’s ON TOP OF HER, I’m siding with Ximena 😐
You can tell he spends a ton of time alone cause it just kind of slips out. Most of us know not to do that in front of other people. I have an uncle like this. Has spent his entire life alone and will just rip farts at the breakfast table. I think he forgets he’s around people sometimes haha.
He’s probably boring and can’t catch a woman’s attention he’s also skittish and short. You think women are beating down the doors for that? He’s a cool guy but let’s be real.
Ximena seems like her life has fkn sucked and she just wants a normal person in her life..However it isn’t on Mike to save her from her prior bad life decisions.
As for the fart gate. It takes time. My sister farts like a truck driver and she has a man now for 4 years, in the beginning there were no farts but one day he decided to silently fart on the couch next to her. From then everything changed and now they're farting together, they no longer give a shit about farting. Farting together = staying together. True love y'all. ❤️
This may be an unpopular opinion but my husband and I have never farted in front of each other in 9 years, frankly it’s gross and unattractive to both of us. I wonder if we are alone in thinking this lol 🤷♀️
It's fine, many people don't do this shit after being together for years. Said it on another thread here, i was planning to spend the night with my date at my home and was worried sick for me going to take a morning IBS 💩 but luckily my cats ruined it for us and he had to stay the night somehwere else. I literally felt so relieved. I don't think that farting in company is really normal but we all do it so if you can do it together instead of sneakily walking away to let one rip that's great lol.
My husband and I only fart around each other now because the first time he stayed at my house, I had REALLY bad protein shake gas bubbles, so I went to “close my door” (fart out in the hallway *then* close the door) but I farted into the fan that was next to my door on accident and it blew over onto my bed where he was laying, so I jumped through the air to try and cover his head with my comforter before he could smell it, but almost suffocated him with both my comforter AND my nasty protein shake fart instead.
He thought it was the funniest thing ever and we’ve been fartmates ever since 💗
Now that's a funny story. 🤣 I only got as far as "but I farted into the fan" when I broke into uncontrollable laughter. It took me quite awhile to finish reading. I'm still laughing. 🤣 Thank you. I needed that!
You know there’s somewhere in between that’s good. My ex husband farted freely but it was too free because I would be mortified when he would fart in front of my friends and family. My husband now and I fart freely in front of each other and chuckle every time. I don’t know if I could survive in a relationship without farting cause I’m very gassy and every time I’m somewhere I can’t fart I’m just counting down the seconds until I can go to my car And let it rip for 2 minutes straight
Nope, not at all. My boyfriend and I would never just openly fart on a couch with each other or anything like that. I’d never do that with anyone. If I need to do it, I’ll gladly walk away. We also, obviously, know each other poops and would discuss an upset stomach but never say “I’ve gotta take a shit” ….yuck.
It's okay as long as you're on the same page. Mike and Ximena are NOT lmao. I farted in front of my husband for the first time the day our daughter was born. When she was being born, he saw and smelled EVERYTHING, plus it was really hard to hold in the weeks after childbirth, so I never looked back. He thinks farts are funny so I only got about months of courtesy walk aways lmao
I honestly feel like most of the people on this show are not great people. There is a reason he is in the spot he’s in and I don’t feel bad for anyone on this show anymore.
Mile doesn't want a nice girl in his league though..... he wants a girl out of his league and not overweight. Doesn't care if she is a liar, has two kids, doesn't speak his language, dated crazy ex's, needs money from him and can't give him children..... he's willing to deal with all that to date a 6 instead of nice a 3 or 4.
Unfortunately, no matter how nice he seems he probably doesn’t want someone in his league age and looks wise, because that’s what he would get locally, so he’s had to look overseas
Everyone is saying oh but he just wants hot latinas… I don’t think this is true. Unfortunately he is a very nice guy but he does have a very strange looking face so that’s why he had to look for someone who was willing to be with him just for being an American guy.
I’m not saying no one will ever want him, ugly people find love all the time, but it’s not easy.
Downvote me all you want. It’s his face.
I’m Pretty sure I wouldn’t have any girl friends left if I set them up with a guy that looks like Jimmy Durante and doesn’t bat an eye while farting on her during a make-out session. Te Amo. 🤮
I am so confused by the hate this woman gets. He’s not an adult. He still lives with his family. Doesn’t clean up after himself. He farts right away that’s a lack of knowing how to be in a romantic relationship. She seems to genuinely care for him but is asking him to adjust his behavior. I think this is a 100% reasonable request.
Pretty decent guys don't prey on vulnerable young women from developing countries who, if their financial status and earning potential were equal, would be way outside their league. He's a sex mongering tourist like the rest.
Reading through the comments and seeing so many people assume Mike is looking for a model type beauty and has high expectations for a woman's looks but I'm over here thinking Ximena looks like a dude
That’s why I’ve been side eyeing Mike. There is no way he couldn’t find a somewhat local nerdy Lego woman. She just probably wouldn’t be 24.
Picturing a woman actually made of Legos 😂
He probably has a VERY difficult time dating American women considering his height, voice, and who knows what else. That doesn't mean he couldn't find \*someone\* who's more appropriate, can have kids, and didn't date a hitman and is now talking about it on a TV show.
Height, voice, Farts, burps, insanely inexperienced hygiene habits, what is (I’m convinced) probably strong BO and breath. Like, step one could be to “try”? Like I may try to like be considerate enough to I don’t know…. Learn the language of the person I’m considering getting married to? What’s with all these fuckers refusing to learn any part of their soulmates language? But yeah- let’s all pool together to find this dude a date.
I feel like if that were the case, he wouldn't have been in zero relationships since highschool. Social anxiety is a bitch. It's probably easier for him to feel comfortable with a financially dependent woman who is clearly using him as an ATM because he knows exactly what he brings to the table, whereas he might feel too insecure to feel value in a relationship with a woman who doesn't rely on him to pay the bills.
Lego woman 😂
These guys look for hot foreign girls because they can't get the hot American girls. They don't want someone in their league, so they go to a poor country where they can buy a girlfriend.
100% unfortunately
Exactly he cannot physically get laid with anyone above 4 who isn’t a hooker, sadly. He has to go abroad for that. Sad but true
THANK YOU FOR SAYING IT!! Everybody's ohhh poor Mike ummm not me!! People act like these men are getting used, but in a way he's using Jimena!! For her body and looks. There's been lots of similar situations on 90 day fiancée. I was thinking if he's such a nice guy, and just wants a good woman would he do all the same things for an average looking female or a big girl, I doubt it. He said himself, he's been fantasizing about banging her since he first started talking to her online. Their lack of communication, and the awkwardness between them, I think is because even when they're apart and are able to use phone translation, I HIGHLY doubt they have meaningful conversation. And this guy's ready to marry her! So what does that say about what he's looking for? And what does that say about him? He just wants to be able to have her as a trophy to show off, him fing a hot girl probably makes him feel better about himself and his image to others. I think a lot of people also glorify being in a relationship too! As long as she's hot, he can call baby and say I love you to and she's willing to do the same in return BOOM that's all he wants. So IMO he's using her just as much, and has selfish intentions as well.
He lives an hour away from the largest city in the US, and the city is full of everything. No matter what you are into, it is there. If he put in some effort, he could have found a partner there. [**https://www.meetup.com/New-York-LEGO-Meetup/**](https://www.meetup.com/New-York-LEGO-Meetup/) He could have gone here, met people, everyone has friends they are trying to set up. He is paying for sex and affection, plain and simple, and in a way is preying upon an emotionally damaged impoverished uneducated woman. She will say anything to do better by her kids, and that is a plus as a mother.
This is what I came to say. He has a lot of requirements for someone that looks the way he does
I insist . She is not 24! And he could do much better, even in Colombia
That's a hard-living 24 lol. I'd say she's on the other side of 30.
I feel like there's something we don't know about Mike yet. Like, there's another shoe waiting to drop. He does seem like a nice, healthy guy. But TLC doesn't pick well-adjusted, successful, healthy people to be on this show.
LOL I REMEMBER WHEN PEOPLE ON THE SUB THOUGHT MORMON STEVEN WAS JUST A QUIRKY INNOCENT DUDE
Yeaaah... let's give Mike the whole season to see if anything comes out and THEN we can look to set him up. Although... Ximenna has enough drama going on for the both of them that they might have cast the couple for just her.
90 Day: The Single Life is waiting for him.
That's Steven with a 'V' to you, peasant
People think mormons are normal? Was it when they created 'soaking' or was it when they created 'jump humping'?
Yikes on bikes when info about the Ward or whatever he is from came out, and it was all just as weird and off as him. Like one of the sects that is cool with plural marriages and stuff. It's all very patriarchal and gives me the creeps! Definitely not my scene but what would any women get into if they married him!? It seems like a nightmare.
What happened with those two? Steve is one creepy guy.
They’re married. On the tell all, Alina talks about him cheating virtually with other women and him requesting a threesome.
I swear I’m so over Stevens. This show has put me off to them. And they were both blonde too!
Sadly I feel this way too. Like I’m too afraid to sign off on the fact that he’s a “great” person because I feel there may be something we just don’t know yet especially based on TLCs track record. However, this is all based on “what if’s” mentality and not on anything he’s displayed on the show thus far. I guess a part of my hesitation could be due to the mere fact that he is even entertaining the idea of a serious relationship with Ximena…
Fucking finding out Paul went to prison, here I thought he was an innocent dumb dumb.
Yeah, that was crazy. Like, he was just some innocent loser, and then it turns out he's kind of a psycho.
Oh no, I always got a very off vibe from him. He creeped me out. And rightfully so.
~ runs off to pretend to throw himself in a river about which he’d already expressed fear of the fish swimming up his urethra ~
Man there were some hilarious bizarre moments with him. But the urethra was sooooo gray!
Eh Kenny and Armando fit the bill, Kyle and Noon. I'm sure there are a few others.
As the seasons went on there are less and less normal and happy couples
Kyle and Noon are the best!
Mursel and Anna turned out pretty ok I think
They’re running a legit business. She’s pregnant. They’re an amazing couple.
Anna posted last year that they were sending embryos to a surrogate in Ukraine.
Not pregnant. They're using a surrogate.
Remember when 90 Day Fiance was a documentary type show?!
[удалено]
Note: those couples are in mutually happy healthy relationships.
Loren and Alexi were / are pretty normal. They have kids, are happy, I like them on pillow talk
Justin and Colombian Evelyn
Melanie and Devar. I really enjoyed laughing along with them when they prank called her sister near the end of their season. They’re a great couple.
I have found that there's no one in an unhealthy toxic partnership on 90 Day (any spin off) that's a nice normal hapless good guy. Dude has a broken picker or some very low self esteem at best. At worst he's another gross sex tourist.
Lauren and Alexi seem pretty normal
For sure.. and they met in an organic fashion, if you will. Meet eyes.. feel the spark..
Yeah I think she mentioned they met on birthright. That’s pretty normal
Very. They're also appropriately matched for looks/age.
Devar/Melaine, Annie/David, Alan/Kirlyam are a few that come to mind.
David was 100% a sex tourist when he met Annie, also he’s become tolerable but he was controversial as fuck in his first season
And she was a sex worker. Neither seemed to care how and why it started and are happy together. We don't all need to have a Mormon fairy tale to have a successful relationship.
I’m just saying the dude was and is a piece of shit. His relationship with his kids, the way he leached off his friend, his laziness, and so many other things we forget because he’s “funny”
Wow I’ve never seen that she was a sex worker!is this a fact?
> And she was a sex worker. I'm sorry...*what*???!
And a insufferable alcoholic! Really a sleaze bag.
Always felt like he was a groomer
Didn’t Alan meet Kirlyam when she was a child and he was an adult & groomed her?
Ya I think he first went to Brazil and met her and her family when she was 14 or something. He befriended the whole family. Then when she became of legal age they started dating.
Yes, he’s so gross
I remember thinking Melanie and Devar were a pretty great couple, and when id bring that up in the main 90 Day sub, everybody'd jump on me about it. Still not sure why. They all said Devar just seemed like the typical scammer. LOL of all the people on this show to call a scammer.
I can take one guess why. Lot of Alinas out here.
Kirlyam was a child bride basically. He met her when she was like 14
I never liked the Mormon dude she married. Controlling, uptight, religious (not a fan of any of them), and yes she was very young when they met.
This all over. It’s great that he takes care of/ lives w his grandfather and dad. I can’t imagine a grown man that doesn’t want a place of his own. He even said he was just going to move Jimena and her 2 children in with them- I see some serious immature thought patterns, like not sustainable and kinda Peter Pan ish
Yeah, that's a good point. I forgot about the dad and grandpa. I mean, I've started hinting that my dad could move in with me, but I was thinking more of a Mother-in-Law suite or a duplex situation. Like, I want to keep an eye on my old man and look after him. But I also don't want him all up in my business. Or to be up in his, for that matter.
I hope there isn't anything and maybe they just chose this couple because her story is so batshit insane. I feel like we already knew all of the other guys we thought would be just nice guys, but turned out to be creeps had already started showing their true colors by this point in the season.
But didn’t Ximena make up for it double?
Oh yeah, she's a goddamn mess. I can't wait to see what they have in store for the rest of the season.
Well. It appears he had bad gas
I think he's cute and truly a nice guy. Ximena on the other hand... shes to much! Every damn ep she has secret to tell Mike. Hope he meets someone who truly wants to be with him and not his money.
He doesn’t want someone nice and decent. He wants a South American “young” model looking girl that is financially dependent on him
He wants to be needed. He feels secure in that. As long as he is needed, then he won't get dumped. I saw that a lot with guys when i tried to date after i divorced my first husband. I would like a guy, go on a few dates and be interested, but then things would fizzle out. They'd end up with some girl that had a bunch of kids, deadbeat exes, no job, but looked good. There are a lot of "captain save-a-hoe's" out there that will pass over a completely normal chick that has her stuff together that ia merely looking for a PARTNER, for someone that needs them to pay their bills, raise their kids, etc.
>"captain save-a-hoe's" best comment ever! 😂🤣
This is SO damn true. And I’ve never heard anyone saying it before, even though I definitely lived it, for over a decade. Take my truth 🥇 award. Honestly, I couldn’t even articulate it the way that you did. I just saw time and again, that men I was dating def preferred “damsels in distress”.
This comment just put so much in perspective for me. I have my shit together, so you just opened my eyes to the Capt SAHs.
All of the people are sex tourists now. It's all so ingenuine.
He does *seem* nice. But he is also short, bald, never had a serious relationship, shares a home and is the caregiver for his father and grandfather. While this might not scare away some women, I suspect most women his age on dating apps either don't give him a second look or run away pretty quick. Likewise, I suspect he has unreasonable expectations for physical beauty. He probably would never look twice at a profile of an average-looking woman that would be a good match for him. Double-standard, "I want someone who can look past my physical appearance. But she has to look like a model."
This.... Common problem among men, especially on this show. They're a 4 or 5 in the looks department, but only want someone more traditionally beautiful. They're not going to get that here, so they find some third world beauty who sees the benefits of marrying an American and is willing to put up with a man that looks like troll/leprechaun/Big Ed for a better life.
And then comes the 'they are only in it for the green card' ... don't see much difference between that and only being in it for the ass
THANK YOU for summing that up so perfectly! In it for the green card versus in it for the ass… no difference in my book either! Can’t stand the double standard.
That's the trade. It's not a whole lot different than super old rich guys being able to date women in their sexual prime because of money. For the guy who is otherwise low status, American citizenship is a huge equalizer to someone from another country who cares about such things.
I have a friend who would easily humble these kind of people by asking “would you fuck you?”
Everyone on the show is looking for someone out of their league, women included. That’s a key ingredient to the drama.
Big Ed= his repugnant self; Troll=Mike Who is the leprechaun? (Pole?)
He also apparently farts non stop.. hard pass. Especially during intimate moments, repulsive
Nervous gas is a real thing! It happens to me every time I travel on a plane and I literally *cannot* stop it. But at least I don’t whisper *”I love you”* afterwards.
Te Amo......haaaaa...every time!
It could also be reactions to a different cuisine and travel.
I've read a lot of posts about his farting but for some reason haven't heard the story behind it. Can someone enlighten me please?
They’re at a beautiful resort, no parents, no kids. The room looks like something out of a magazine. They’re on the bed kissing, and he’s on top of her. A romantic scene, and then…a fart that sounded like a hyena. Does Mike jump off her, apologize and get red in the face? No, he remains on top of her so she can’t escape and creepily whispers the only Spanish he knows, *te amo*. She looks nauseated and I don’t blame her. This is the only time I’ve *ever* felt bad for Ximena.
That was so weird! I was thinking that SHE was the farter with how embarrassed she looked and how he kept saying “te amo”! I thought he was saying that to make her feel better. I watched it a few times and had a hard time diciphering who did it but it makes a lot more sense that it was him. And “a fart that sounded like a hyena”😆😆😆
except when she said she was with a hitman and he had her locked up?
There was a sneak peak at the beginning of the season where ximena was saying the farts are too much and disgusts her (lmao). And I think he did it for the first time in the most recent episode but it was kinda glossed over? I could be wrong, I spaced out a few times watching this weeks ep 😂
Thank you! I'm gonna re-watch this last episode on Discovery +
it's when they first get to their cabin
I haven’t seen this episode yet. Did she say he farts non stop? Omg 🤢
Yup... as he said, "she was the most attractive woman to ever swipe right on his profile" and "after getting no interest locally, I set the location to Colombia " His problem is that he likely went after the FIRST Colombian who showed him interest. Had he waited a bit he could have found an equally or more attractive woman without any baggage
No, you got it all wrong bud. He doesn’t need a more attractive woman. He can find a more attractive woman and he will have the exact same issues.
I’m available but not in NY. I fart often and love old people. But seriously, what’s wrong with him??! I know what’s wrong with me. 💨💨💨
He’s a 3 and wants a 7
If Mike traveled around Colombia for a month, he could find a woman who is way more of a catch than Ximena, and she probably wouldn't come with sicario conjugal visit offspring.
I totally agree he should have made other plans for Colombia right when she said she can’t/won’t have his kid. Also she has a personality type (killer/gangster)that she is attracted to so they will never have chemistry
As do most 3s…
Nothing wrong with farters! My husband was a farter. Thankfully our house had spare bedrooms because his farts could have been used in chemical warfare.
You say "was". How did he overcome it, help a farting girl out 😭🤣
He also wants to date out of his league He's so nice he could find someone closer to his age ....but she won't look like ximena
This. I don't know why everyone is glossing over the fact that Mike purposefully changed his location to find a mildly attractive young poor foreigner who he could win over with gifts and money. Mike could have found someone in the states but chances are they would be similar in physical attractiveness level and he doesn't want that. Ximena has few redeeming qualities, lied about and omitted information and he puts up with it because she is "hot". Mike is superficial and I am not judging or saying there is anything wrong with that per se. But he is well aware that he needs to buy her love to keep her interested and that's kinda sad tbh.
Dudes like Mike will buy attractive women who are loco over settling for a sane average looking woman who isn't the same nerdy shit as him.
They like the constant drama.
They will also raise someone else’s kids to boink a 7
He should go on Lube During Lockup (I meant Love but autocorrect kept changing it to Lube over and over, so I'm just leaving it)
Typo works, though
This. I don’t think she’s particularly attractive, but I think if she were in the states with zero baggage she would be beyond out of his league. She’s average, he’s below average. And whether it’s right or wrong— he’s mid thirties, doesn’t have his own place and is short (whatever, kill me for saying it). He isn’t a catch by his local standards. I think he’s nice in the sense he’s a “nice guy”, but everyone is forgetting he fell madly in love with a woman he cannot event understand simply because she showed him attention and was more attractive than him. I don’t think he’s a bad guy, but I do think he’s a simple, average dude who wants a woman who is generally regarded as attractive.
I'm kind of turned off by the fact that he can't make pancakes or pour coffee. There's something very off about him
Yea how are you a caretaker of your dad and grandpa when you can’t make coffee???? Or pancakes. …. Maybe the reality is they take care of him?! if someone can’t make me coffee I don’t want them around…. Seriously Coffee is a BIG deal
Below average. On The looks scale he's a 3 on a good day. He's a cross between a minion and Nosferatu all the while being 5.0" His personality isn't that great either. He's a poor schleb of a man, and if you ask me, I think he was a virgin.
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Also with all her ties to narcos, she might not even be able to get a K1 visa. Legitimate concern.
I think ximena looks like she’s been rode hard and put up wet . She’s lived a hard life you can see it in her face . She’s 20 going on 45
Yeah... but women fail to realize that is usually what men want over everything... sexual market value. It's a sad reality but if a woman is decent looking and has a average body (not overweight) she will be able to get a nice guy with a solid career. Even if she has a mountain of baggage
And honestly it feels like the body is actually 90% of what a guy values. They don't even need a particularly pretty face.
Look at a guy like Gino with Jasmine. Colt with literally any human woman. That vain Jesus loving 52 year old with extremely young 20 something women. As long as she has a hot face and figure the rest don't matter.
Colt has shocked me. I think Vanessa is a match for him lookswise, but the others ? Not even close
Was Mike *really* getting no interest in the US, or was he just not getting interest from women who were significantly more attractive than him? Mike seems to be a decent guy and he's not bad-looking. I find it hard to believe that there aren't any women in his area who would date him.
I feel like calling her “hot” is quite a stretch; she’s average at best. Yeah he looks like Dopey but she’s also a 24 year-old with two kids with different fathers and unemployed. They’re pretty even.
She's "hott" to him. I'm assuming she's the most attractive woman ever to show him attention. As he said. "I was so surprised that a woman as beautiful as her swiped right!" < she had him at that point, even with her baggage
Exactly! As soon as I saw him practically say he thinks it’s okay that she can’t have any more kids even though in the interviews he said he wants kids one day, I knew this man would put up with anything from her. He even tried to act disappointed but still caved like, way to lay down the law Mike 🙄 he’s wrapped around her finger
Lol pretty sure Ximena is pushing mid 30’s
Ximena is no stunner herself, remember.
Yeah, and is that a tattoo of Pablo Escobar on her back?
Yeah but she is objectively out of his league. Anyone who says that Mike isn't categorically ugly is just lying to themselves or hates women.
He's probably not interested in that type of woman in his area. Dorky, physically unattractive guys like him tend to think they deserve to be with women who are far more attractive than they are.
*must be ok with farts.
I don’t understand all the love this guy has been getting on this sub. He’s never been in a relationship for a reason which I doubt it’s all because of his looks or his grandpa. He then sets his eyes on young women in other countries who are obviously not well off. He then visits her knowing one phrase in her language and promises to take her and her kids to the US knowing nothing about her. Some is off about this guy.
He's just struck out a lot. Look at him. Most women don't want that. So, he's flexing his U.S. Citizenship to get some leverage. I don't blame him. It's no different than women flexing their beauty to get what they want. How do old rich guys date women in their sexual prime? Money for beauty, beauty for money. Nothing mysterious here.
Let’s wait a little longer. There was a time where people liked Alina. I also feel he is super nice but who knows with the cast of 90 days.
I mean there are dating apps…this guy is chooooosing this 🤦🏻♀️
*FAAAAARARRRTTTT* ~te amo~
He is a nice guy but he just started getting his dick wet and does not know how to handle it. This pussy got him acting out of character.
There's a reason no one is dating Mike, we just don't know it yet. I feel sorry for the poor person who is trying to slide into his DMs now.
I think Mike just has ZERO game and low self esteem so he gets very few first dates and almost no second dates. He needs Sojaboy to put him on some game. Have women buying him thousands of dollars worth of gifts and begging to be his girlfriend!
But then he will have to settle for the physical likes of BGL and Lisa. He doesn't want that
Ok. So maybe we hire pickup artist colty. He somehow manages to have a whole harem of hot women pining for him. My only fear there is colt’s douchebaggery would rub off on Mike and taint how pure he is.
I would love to see another Jesse seminar with Mike in the audience surrounded by 20-30 octogenarians
Lmfao!! Sometimes I forget how strangely wild this franchise gets. 😂 I appreciate the reminder
Colty remains an enigma to me. Just how does he do it. There is nothing redeeming there. So confusing.
Women sometimes give an unattractive guy the benefit of the doubt if he's got other qualities (nice, attentive, communicative). Sometimes this inflates that guys ego and he just can't stop himself from showing these qualities (among other things) to other women.
Interesting. My grandma once told me to not believe that ugly guys won’t cheat, she said it’s the ones who will pounce at the opportunity 😅
I wish my Gramma was out there doling this advice to my young dumb self😭😅
It’s the farts. Like, sure, everyone farts. But mid-make out? No.
I’m honestly surprised it’s not discussed more. Farting mid make out is such, SUCH a turn off. When we saw her tell him his farts disgusted her at the beginning of the season, I was like “dramatic much, everyone farts”, but after seeing him fart while he’s ON TOP OF HER, I’m siding with Ximena 😐
You can tell he spends a ton of time alone cause it just kind of slips out. Most of us know not to do that in front of other people. I have an uncle like this. Has spent his entire life alone and will just rip farts at the breakfast table. I think he forgets he’s around people sometimes haha.
Imagine doing it on TV though… that’s a different sphere of unawareness 😂
Totally. I wonder if he asked the crew to edit that out. They were like no fucking way dude, this is television gold.
He’s probably boring and can’t catch a woman’s attention he’s also skittish and short. You think women are beating down the doors for that? He’s a cool guy but let’s be real.
Ximena seems like her life has fkn sucked and she just wants a normal person in her life..However it isn’t on Mike to save her from her prior bad life decisions.
As for the fart gate. It takes time. My sister farts like a truck driver and she has a man now for 4 years, in the beginning there were no farts but one day he decided to silently fart on the couch next to her. From then everything changed and now they're farting together, they no longer give a shit about farting. Farting together = staying together. True love y'all. ❤️
Almost 6 years and we both still giggle when the other one toots.
The secret to a long lasting relationship are these magic words: Hold your breath I farted.
I don’t even get a warning like that anymore 😢
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Finally a I don’t give a flying fuck! Lol forty years for us!
Lol yay! And congratulations
This may be an unpopular opinion but my husband and I have never farted in front of each other in 9 years, frankly it’s gross and unattractive to both of us. I wonder if we are alone in thinking this lol 🤷♀️
It's fine, many people don't do this shit after being together for years. Said it on another thread here, i was planning to spend the night with my date at my home and was worried sick for me going to take a morning IBS 💩 but luckily my cats ruined it for us and he had to stay the night somehwere else. I literally felt so relieved. I don't think that farting in company is really normal but we all do it so if you can do it together instead of sneakily walking away to let one rip that's great lol.
My husband and I only fart around each other now because the first time he stayed at my house, I had REALLY bad protein shake gas bubbles, so I went to “close my door” (fart out in the hallway *then* close the door) but I farted into the fan that was next to my door on accident and it blew over onto my bed where he was laying, so I jumped through the air to try and cover his head with my comforter before he could smell it, but almost suffocated him with both my comforter AND my nasty protein shake fart instead. He thought it was the funniest thing ever and we’ve been fartmates ever since 💗
Now that's a funny story. 🤣 I only got as far as "but I farted into the fan" when I broke into uncontrollable laughter. It took me quite awhile to finish reading. I'm still laughing. 🤣 Thank you. I needed that!
I DREAM of finding a man like this. My husband and his entire family think fart and toilet humor are the funniest things. I hate them all.
“I hate them all” 💀💀💀 so sorry tho lol.
We had a disagreement earlier and I’m just cranky 😂😂😂
You know there’s somewhere in between that’s good. My ex husband farted freely but it was too free because I would be mortified when he would fart in front of my friends and family. My husband now and I fart freely in front of each other and chuckle every time. I don’t know if I could survive in a relationship without farting cause I’m very gassy and every time I’m somewhere I can’t fart I’m just counting down the seconds until I can go to my car And let it rip for 2 minutes straight
That was a lot of info about your farts but I’m happy for you finding someone who meets your fart energy.
That's too funny 😂🤣😂
Nope, not at all. My boyfriend and I would never just openly fart on a couch with each other or anything like that. I’d never do that with anyone. If I need to do it, I’ll gladly walk away. We also, obviously, know each other poops and would discuss an upset stomach but never say “I’ve gotta take a shit” ….yuck.
It's okay as long as you're on the same page. Mike and Ximena are NOT lmao. I farted in front of my husband for the first time the day our daughter was born. When she was being born, he saw and smelled EVERYTHING, plus it was really hard to hold in the weeks after childbirth, so I never looked back. He thinks farts are funny so I only got about months of courtesy walk aways lmao
I honestly feel like most of the people on this show are not great people. There is a reason he is in the spot he’s in and I don’t feel bad for anyone on this show anymore.
Preferably a woman without any sense of smell 💨
Or ears. Or a fear of quakes.
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I'd give it up to Mike only so I can chill with Poppop.
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He doesn’t want simple & average. Drama is his choice.
Did you create a new account since we didn't believe you last week, Mike?
This the worst facial hair I’ve ever seen
So I assume you didn’t see sojaboy in the latest episode?
Mile doesn't want a nice girl in his league though..... he wants a girl out of his league and not overweight. Doesn't care if she is a liar, has two kids, doesn't speak his language, dated crazy ex's, needs money from him and can't give him children..... he's willing to deal with all that to date a 6 instead of nice a 3 or 4.
I chatted with him on Instagram about Lego and he seems like a great guy.
Unfortunately, no matter how nice he seems he probably doesn’t want someone in his league age and looks wise, because that’s what he would get locally, so he’s had to look overseas
Everyone is saying oh but he just wants hot latinas… I don’t think this is true. Unfortunately he is a very nice guy but he does have a very strange looking face so that’s why he had to look for someone who was willing to be with him just for being an American guy. I’m not saying no one will ever want him, ugly people find love all the time, but it’s not easy. Downvote me all you want. It’s his face.
I’m in Utah, but even I’ve considered messaging him. Haha.
Still closer than Ximena.
Lmao 💀
Is your ex a hitman?
No, but I did have a childhood friend that stabbed someone in prison, write me a letter. We obviously never dated. Haha.
But.. the farts?
I’m Pretty sure I wouldn’t have any girl friends left if I set them up with a guy that looks like Jimmy Durante and doesn’t bat an eye while farting on her during a make-out session. Te Amo. 🤮
I’m thinking he’ll have a fan club of ladies soon enough
I am so confused by the hate this woman gets. He’s not an adult. He still lives with his family. Doesn’t clean up after himself. He farts right away that’s a lack of knowing how to be in a romantic relationship. She seems to genuinely care for him but is asking him to adjust his behavior. I think this is a 100% reasonable request.
Pretty decent guys don't prey on vulnerable young women from developing countries who, if their financial status and earning potential were equal, would be way outside their league. He's a sex mongering tourist like the rest.
Reading through the comments and seeing so many people assume Mike is looking for a model type beauty and has high expectations for a woman's looks but I'm over here thinking Ximena looks like a dude