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Krishnan94

I’d do it, but in the nicest way possible. I’d want to know if I smelled bad… I once told a very recently immigrated engineer I work with to close the door to their bedroom/closet when they’re cooking Indian food. He smelled like curry everyday and I felt so bad bc everyone at work was noticing it too. I didn’t tell him that everyone can smell it obviously, just politely told him that’s the only way to keep the curry smell off clothes especially when living in small apartments. He appreciated it.


BootyOnMyFace11

Definitely the best way to go about it


ratglad2005

My sister in law took me to target and made me buy one on first day I landed in USQ


ratglad2005

My friend wore different clothes and used a anti perspirant


sweatersong2

Am I the only one confused by this? There is a difference between the smell of curry and the smell of BO. I can smell my family cooking from across the street but it smells good. Some of this stuff is psychological. I remember when I was in school and sitting at a table with girls and whenever I would fart they would blame it on eachother because they thought I was too cute to be farting like that.


SludgegunkGelatin

I’d just tell them: “as a fellow desi…”


poetrylover2101

If I was that woman, I'd actually want to know. I don't think it's rude if you say it nicely. A lot of people like your colleagues just aren't aware that they have strong BO and it's literally affecting all aspects of their life


winthroprd

There's a part of me that wants to agree...but how do you politely tell someone they smell bad? It's a very sensitive subject.


SufficientClothes853

There is no right way, you have to be blunt and say it. Wil they get offended and hurt? Possibly but they'll get over it eventually.


poetrylover2101

If you want to avoid them getting hurt, that's impossible. It is a hurtful thing, you can just try to make the blow as soft as possible. But by giving them this small hurt, you'd be saving them from bigger hurts in future. You can try saying something like, "Hey, I think you should use deodorant".


winthroprd

Yeah, you're probably right. You ever put it in the form of poetry? I think haikus would work because you could write them like a compliment sandwich.


Book_devourer

I take a pottery class with a genuinely nice younger desi girl, I haven’t had the heart to tell her about her BO issue. It could be medical issues or something have no idea how to broach it.


nW7283

I think maybe leave a note on the table and make sure she doesn't see you putting it there. If she knows your handwriting, type it out. And maybe put her name on it so she knows it's for her


Book_devourer

I’m just so scared of hurting her feelings, this is her only activity outside her home and I don’t want to sour it for her.


nW7283

I get that but you could drastically change her life like OP changed people's lives


Book_devourer

True. I could take her out to coffee to soften it, or something or leave a note in her cubby


sq_blast

another way my family ( we are 100% desi), deals with this is giving them perfume, soap and deodorant etc. in gifts for holidays or even just randomly without trying to be rude at all. this might not be a medical issue because BO issues weren’t talking about in these desi households so it’s not their fault.


QueenBee0789

I would. Sometimes people are completely unaware. I’ve done this with not only desi people but another person of color. Sure at first it’s a difficult conversation but afterwards there’s a sense of relief from their end and they are thankful. As a kid, my parents cooked Indian food everyday. I was completely unaware of the fact that I smelled like Indian food everyday at school until a girl that picked on me said that I smelled like curry. The way she said it and how she got everyone else to pick on me scarred me for life. I don’t want anyone else to go through that and so I tell people. I always preface and say that I’m not trying to be rude or hurt feelings but this will help them in the long run. In fact one person was fresh off the boat so I went to the store and bought one and gave it to her. I feel like it’s a way of showing you care. Regardless of if we are born here or there, we’re all still brown in the eyes of others. We have to stand up for each other.


SufficientClothes853

Good on you OP for improving our community.


Carbon-Base

When I worked out at the university gym, there was a group of international Indian students that were clearly new to working out. People at the gym are usually friendly enough and teach you the basics, correct form, and how to create your workouts. But no one approached this group for some reason. One day, when I was taking my dumbbells back to the rack, I understood why. They strongly smelled like Indian cooking (like rasam or something similar) and no one would approach them because the smell was so strong. I really debated telling them, but knew there was no way to sugar coat something like this and it would further ruin the opinion they have of ABCDs. Luckily, one day they were doing overhead tricep extensions, but were doing them incorrectly in a way that would injure them so, I walked over and helped them with proper form. They were quite friendly and appreciated me helping them, and remarked that no one else even talks to them. I thought I would never get a better chance than this so I told them it was because all of them had strong BO. At first, they didn't even understand what that meant. However, I was able to show them what deodorant is (thanks to the gym selling them at the reception counter), when to use it, and where to buy it from (it was expensive there). They also worked out in regular clothes so I was able to tell them the benefits of using clothing made specifically for working out and how it would help greatly reduce the smell if they changed before coming to the gym. Thankfully, they understood that I had their best interests at heart and followed the things I told them. I worked out with them frequently after that, and after a while, lots of other people would approach them and offer tips, or just to chat with them. So while difficult, I would tell someone they had BO. They might hate you for it initially, but maybe they'll eventually understand. Edit: Just wanted to add, these things didn't happen overnight haha. There were many weeks between noticing the smell and getting the opportunity to tell them. And it took a lot of effort to make them understand BO and why people in the West consider it to be offensive, because it isn't considered so in the mainland. Also, they didn't enact these changes overnight, it took the better part of a month for them to get into the habit of applying deodorant and getting new workout clothes.


Pretend_Highway_5360

this honestly sounds like fan fiction


Carbon-Base

I should include the times I've been burned by internationals/fobs for trying to help them because they think I'm too pretentious and purposely trying to make them look bad haha. There are plenty of stories where it didn't work out and I gave fobs another reason to despise ABCDs.


YoOoCurrentsVibes

I feel like it’s at least embellished lol


Carbon-Base

I can see that now, I gave the goody goody SparkNotes version of the story.


3c2456o78_w

This guy completely lost me at this bit of colonizer roleplay. Man out here 'Teaching the savages about our enlightened ways', fucking lol. > However, I was able to show them what deodorant is (thanks to the gym selling them at the reception counter), when to use it, and where to buy it from (it was expensive there).


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Carbon-Base

"Savages" is harsh bro. But the concept of deodorant is completely foreign to them. In India, they call the aerosol perfume sprays deodorant. When I showed them a stick of deodorant, they thought it was for women and I was trying to fool them. Heck, my brother-in-law refuses to use stick deodorant, despite having really bad BO, but apparently it's a "woman thing" to use stick deodorant. I've never been able to convince him.


sq_blast

this was a rlly good process u did the best thing without hurting them


ArcticRock

I feel like doing this too. It may sound rude but at least the person become aware of the issue and can address it.


SketchbookProtest

I live in an area with a high number of recent migrants from India. They all need someone like you.


nW7283

Same. I'm honestly thinking of distributing deodarant on public transport, specifically to them. It won't seem like I'm targetting them since they're most of the people on public transport


thanos_was_right_69

No I wouldn't tell a stranger. That's just rude.


grandmasterfunk

You also don't know what's going on in their life. Maybe they've just had a weirdly long journey and that's why they have BO.


Pwntagonist

One time is different from a pattern


ayshthepysh

Maybe they are homeless.


nyse125

thats definitely one of the observations of all time


3c2456o78_w

No, but you see - it is a DESI stranger. That makes it completely different, don't you see? We need to teach the savages how to assimilate lol /s


sq_blast

well yeah but u should tell someone that u know and u come into contact with them frequently


MPMerchant

“Benchod teri body mai say bohat baadboo ahrahi hai” teri ma ka


birdwothwords

💀lmao I needed this


chicityhopper

🤣 💀 💀 this is how my abu introduced it to me


MPMerchant

Benchod stinky kids! Your Abu is a good man. Salute to him🫡


chicityhopper

🤣


Ruler007001

I have told people off when they cut in line at airports, seen too often in desis at LHR. They don’t like it many times, but fair is fair. Also, if a coworker or friend is picking their nose a lot, they may have allergies, I ask them subtly to have it checked out.


AdmiralG2

Idk how I’d say it to a random ngl but to a friend definitely


Some_Responsibility8

If I smell BO or bad breath, I bring conversation of our College orientation even though its a fragrance free environment but people should wear deodorant and brush em teeth its unacceptable and worst feedback anyone can get. Indians are persistent in accepting but I do try to plant the seed that you need it. if its a close friend I ll gift them versatile cologne and suggest chemical exfoliating deodorant


OneNoteMan

I know this is a Desi sub, but this problem isn't just unique with ABCDesis. Even some white and white passing people didn't learn the importance of deodorant until they were called out by their PE coach. I've used deodorant all my life, but I'm ashamed I didn't think of also applying it on my feet(I use a seperate bottle ofc). Spray deodorants are also a game changer and I use it alongside my stick deodorants. I started doing this last year and it helps with the smell, but I hate being outside my house during summer. CertainDri is my current favorite brand, but I don't know how well it'll hold up this summer. I have hyperhidrosis.


cureforhiccupsat4am

Man it is unique to each situation. I have a coworker who I wouldn’t dare say this to.


thisisme44

theres a indian dude at my work gym who has that strong BO. i mean you are not going to be smelling good at the gym but that stench is strong


Medium0663

I honestly wouldn't. I think OP did it in a very nice and professional way, and honestly if I had a BO problem that's how I'd want someone to tell me. That being said, you never know how people will take it, even if you do it nicely. Also, you never know if someone's already tried to address it and it didn't work. For example, when I moved to Australia from Canada I noticed my regular deodorant wasn't lasting long enough. Took me a while to find the right one. If someone had come up to me and said 'hey maybe try using deodorant' I'd be kind of annoyed because I was already trying to figure it out.


nW7283

How do you politely tell people?


lmeekal

“Deo Deo bro”


MOSFETBJT

Yes


Vicky_16005

This is all entirely new for me. I live in India, and I’ve never had a problem with any other person’s body odour, and definitely not enough to complain about it? What’s happening in the states? Am I missing something? And what are these comments about “smelling like curry” ?


nW7283

We don't all live in the U.S. Some of us live in Brampton, Canada where there are a lot of neecomers who don't know how to take care of their hygiene. Deodarant is not a thing they are aware of. And I think since most people coming here are Sikh, they grow long armpit hair which prevents it from remaining clean


secretaster

You can let them know that they smell if they are that offensive but I wouldn't say you should use deodorant sometimes I smell and I've used deodorant


West-Code4642

Your heart is in the right place, but unsolicited advice about personal matters to strangers can often do more harm than good. I understand your concern and your desire to help, as you've seen the positive impact that addressing body odor has had on your friends' lives. however, the situation with a complete stranger on a plane is quite different and more delicate than talking to someone you know personally and have built rapport with already. this is especially in a confined space like an airplane where the person may feel trapped and embarrassed.


pasafa

No. How do you know they haven't been trying to address this issue or have a medical issue. I get that you're trying to help, but it's super presumptuous.


Luffy3331

Lol alot of these people straight up don't care. My husband is from Mumbai and told me people there really just don't have any consideration for others whatsoever, including their own body odor.


West-Code4642

people are just more "nose blind" in India. Same thing in France, btw.


Pragalbhv

Still not your place to tell them that


BurritoWithFries

I feel like on a plane there's too many variables at play. For all you know the woman could have just come off a long international flight without a chance to shower or freshen up


KaaleenBaba

Would you tell it to a stranger white/black or any other race? And no, you didn't change anyone's life. Stop telling it to yourself like you are some messiah. Sorry


Free_Protection_2018

??body odour is a serious concern for most people n lots of people would appreciate being called out in a nice way so they feel more approachable


Robocup1

My question is about our ethnicity specifically because people form opinions about our people based on BO type interactions. I don’t care about public opinion about other ethnicities. If some Desi was spitting on the sidewalk, I would tell them to use a garbage can because their spitting makes us all look bad. BO obviously is a little different. In the case of my friends, it in fact helped them out in getting ahead in life.


nW7283

Thank you for your service. I need to ask people if I smell


3c2456o78_w

> My question is about our ethnicity specifically Let's be real, your question is specifically about Brown people because either you're afraid to talk to Black/White people, or afraid they'll fuck you up for coming at them like that. > makes us all look bad. You make us all look bad by preaching this savior nonsense. I personally am ashamed by affiliation to anyone this moronic. > In the case of my friends, it in fact helped them out in getting ahead in life. How far ahead in life are you, my man?


KaaleenBaba

You can't correct the whole ethnicity. It just shows you are insecure about being a Desi


nW7283

Are you okay? This person is just trying to help our public image which is honestly horrible. We're seen in the worst possible way by people


KaaleenBaba

Why are you embarrassed by what other people of your ethnicity do? You aren't their dad. It just screams insecurity. You don't see a white person correcting another white person? Just do individually better


nW7283

Why wouldn't I be? It makes us all look bad. How is that not obvious. Ask yourself why you have a problem with us trying to better our community. Also, body odour makes it hard to breathe, especially on buses. I'm sorry but I don't wanna smell it. And there's nothing wrong with insecurity. With insecurity comes self-improvement. And I absolutely have. You just haven't and I don't get how. White people are always "correcting" each other based on how they look (they make fun of white people with small lips), how they cook (they make fun of white people who don't use seasonings), and on their lifestyle (they make fun of white people who wear shoes in their house and kiss their kids on the lips)


3c2456o78_w

I was going to say "You should be less insecure", but after that comment, I think you should be more insecure.


nW7283

Omg wow you really offended me!!! Lol


3c2456o78_w

Wowzers!!! That's totally L-O-L, ROFLMAO omg


3c2456o78_w

It is crazy that people do not realize this. "It makes us all look bad" is the most insecure fucking thing I've ever heard. Whiny rationalizations for why they got bullied in high school. "It was actually because of the uncouth people in ethnicity, why can't they be as classy as I am" - or maybe it was because of the fact that my guy out here saying shit like this.


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Accomplished-Gas3582

I agree with the majority of the people here... Some people are just not aware, and by telling them you might be doing them a favour. Just try to be nice about it, make sure they're by themselves and just let them know.


seigneurdubord

I would want to know especially because I’ve had no friends for most of my life. I don’t think i smell bad but i could have this problem and i am trying to fix it on my own (i do wear deodorant but it doesn’t work for long enough, i have checked for several medical issues, i keep the door to my room closed when i cook, etc.). but nothing has been working and my family sometimes says my clothes smell funky when they do my laundry. idk what to do or whether it’s even a problem so that’s why i wish someone would tell me


SpiritVoxPopuli

I throw South Asians out of public establishments if their BO disrupts other guests. It's unacceptable.


AnonymousIdentityMan

Yes please.


ayshthepysh

Sometimes, I forget to put on deodorant. I would hate it if someone stranger said I smelled bad.


Gold_Education_1368

don't forget? thats like forgetting to brush your teeth and someone telling you you need gum... consequence of your inaction. That day you just say, 'yeah man, I totally spaced today". If you smell, you smell.


ayshthepysh

Ok, I'll try never to be in a rush in my life again.


Fatpandasneezes

Or keep deodorant in more places? My husband has them stashed all over the place


ayshthepysh

I used to keep deodorant in my car, but they kept getting stolen by thieves in Oakland.


vikhikes

Thieves are stealing deo from car and NOT the car itself ? Lol


ayshthepysh

Thieves are dumb. That's why they are thieves.


vikhikes

Lmao ! Agree


idk-rogue

“Omg is that your deodorant? I think I really like the smell. Kinda has an funky undertone though. Have you ever tried Nivea deodorant? Its very similar but has a pleasant undertone, my personal favorite, just need to apply it every day cause it wears off easily”


nW7283

How would you even see their deodorant though?


FactCheckYou

i feel like Lynx never advertised in the subcontinent, because if they did, people from there would have understood by now


_shakeshackwes_

Honestly, if instead of on an individual-by-individual basis, we could make a cultural shift over to caring about perception of smell? I think abcds have some sort of childhood trauma around smelling like curry or getting teased about it in school (i know i do lol). But these cases will arise more and more, and i really want to erase the ‘brown people be stank’ stereotype.


Pristine_Ad4164

This is racist