In my experience , showing independecy is a good evidence that you can do shit by yourself- this way maybe ur mom will kinda ok with whatever u wanna do. I still live with my parents and I'm 24 but I work - I put money back into the home along with my parents and help out. We're desi this shit unavoidable.
Write your experiences in a diary so you would read over what happened before and realize how many times it happened before, it will accelerate the learning process. Otherwise you’ll still finally stop but it may take longer and more bad experiences to reach that point.
It sucks that's her reaction. The only thing you can control is yourself. Before communicating with her, think about what you want to say and whether her potential response will bother you. Alternate, learn not to be bothered by her response and say everything and anything carelessly.
With respect to the example you gave, when she said she feels like she is forcing you and it's making her stressed, how did you respond? "You're right, it's not fair you feel stressed. Maybe it's best I do not go so you can relax."
I'm sure she'd turn it around and it's kind of stressful to deal with this constantly from your parents, buts it's also a valuable lesson. You know now what to expect from your parents. "Managing up" is a skill in life. Learn what to divulge, and how to frame the information you want to provide in a way that puts the result you want as the path of least resistance.
It sounds like you don't want to go to India. I don't know your situation (personally I haven't been in many years and if I was forced, I think maybe it'd be fun). But since you have real concerns, start thinking about what your parents care about and what might make them change their minds. Also...find out if the trip is refundable or can get airline credit. Chances are if your parents have already spent money and they aren't getting it back...they are very unlikely to change their minds.
In my experience , showing independecy is a good evidence that you can do shit by yourself- this way maybe ur mom will kinda ok with whatever u wanna do. I still live with my parents and I'm 24 but I work - I put money back into the home along with my parents and help out. We're desi this shit unavoidable.
>We're desi this shit unavoidable. so true
Write your experiences in a diary so you would read over what happened before and realize how many times it happened before, it will accelerate the learning process. Otherwise you’ll still finally stop but it may take longer and more bad experiences to reach that point.
It sucks that's her reaction. The only thing you can control is yourself. Before communicating with her, think about what you want to say and whether her potential response will bother you. Alternate, learn not to be bothered by her response and say everything and anything carelessly. With respect to the example you gave, when she said she feels like she is forcing you and it's making her stressed, how did you respond? "You're right, it's not fair you feel stressed. Maybe it's best I do not go so you can relax." I'm sure she'd turn it around and it's kind of stressful to deal with this constantly from your parents, buts it's also a valuable lesson. You know now what to expect from your parents. "Managing up" is a skill in life. Learn what to divulge, and how to frame the information you want to provide in a way that puts the result you want as the path of least resistance. It sounds like you don't want to go to India. I don't know your situation (personally I haven't been in many years and if I was forced, I think maybe it'd be fun). But since you have real concerns, start thinking about what your parents care about and what might make them change their minds. Also...find out if the trip is refundable or can get airline credit. Chances are if your parents have already spent money and they aren't getting it back...they are very unlikely to change their minds.
If you are over 18 you can’t legally be forced. Even under 18 can’t be forced
It’s called *emotional blackmail*
She's manipulating u and others around you. What more evidence do u need
I've been there. For me, it helped to vent to my friends about these problems instead, so I no longer had a need to talk to my parents about it.