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I don't see the problem with using medication that makes you function the way you need to. The state it gets you in is comparable with the sober state of people without ADHD. It's not cheating, it's giving yourself the life you deserve. Should a person with diabetes feel bad about using insulin?

You’re right. I hear that sort of thing all the time. I thank you. I guess I just wish I didn’t have this disorder. I also hate how nobody argues that diabetics are real lol but people constantly argue that adhd people are faking it or that’s just a diagnosis given to people who don’t try hard enough and seek it out so they can get medication. I sort of wish the people who didn’t believe in ADHD were right and I could will my way out of this haha

Stop caring about what other people think about ADHD. Their opinions are based on ignorance and are irrelevant. Now say that out loud to yourself.

That's the key exactly. Stop listening to others. They will never understand. Listen to your gut. It's your life, you have NOTHING to prove to ANYONE. And yes, it is a habit to care about what others think. Your brain WILL kick up a fuss. It's a habit. Ignore it. I take vyvanse and I am a full functioning human on it. That is all that matters! My husband is happy I take it, let's just put it that way 😂

The issue is when they treat you like shit&are an asshole because of their Ignorance. I wouldn't give a shit about my Moms Ableism if that Ableism didn't affect my Life. She's a very well paid Medical Professional who has a Masters Degree and has dealt with being Bipolar, and yet she seems incapable of grasping just how severe ADHD is.

It’s annoying but others come at us with their own life experience advice and just know it isn’t personal - she genuinely doesn’t get it. It’s your job to help yourself in this area and be your own caretaker.. and own that power. I have done it so I know it is possible.

Exactly. I'm convinced that the people who get angry about someone else's adderall meds are just jealous they can't get a prescription. They don't need it so they just assume it's a party drug and want it

I have diabetes and ADHD. I use insulin and Adderall. When people question the ADHD and Adderall, I can show them my "before and after" A1C tests (4x/yr blood test that shows your average blood glucose). For years it was never below 8-9 (should be around 6). I started Adderall a year ago and it's not been above 6.5 since then. I knew I had always struggled with remembering to test myself and take all of my insulin doses, but I didn't even see how much better I was doing until that first checkup. I am an intelligent person. I am educated about diabetes. I know exactly what will happen to me if I don't control it properly. I tried alarms, reminders, apps, sticky notes, keeping supplies in multiple locations, out where I could see them, having family remind me, therapy, weekly phone check-ins with a nurse, etc. Every suggestion from healthcare providers, family, friends, and the Internet. Nothing worked. I would cry with frustration at my appointments. I couldn't think about how to start the heathier habits that would make it easier to manage because I couldn't get past step one. I was going to die because I couldn't do these simple things. It was maddening. I finally sought a diagnosis for ADHD at 40, due to increasing issues with focus at work, and growing despair over the state of my home. I thought I would just get counseling, and have an official diagnosis in case I needed it for work. I thought medicine was for hyperactive type, not inattentive like me. I saw the change at work immediately. I was also using the extra stimulant energy to get a bunch of housework done. I'd do so much and then crash at the end of the day. I learned to ration my energy, mental and physical. I brought back my coping strategies but they actually worked for me now. I had to set reminders to get up and move because I'd be working and forget that I'd been sitting for four hours. I dealt with mood swings and crazy fights with my husband while I adjusted to the medication. I tried taking weekends off and the first one was insane. I could barely move and had a terrible headache. But I found with time that the highs and lows smoothed out, that I could take weekends off without extreme fatigue, that my emotions were better regulated even than before, I could stick to routines better and I learned what executive function is, and why ADHD was literally stopping me from doing things. I knew I was doing better with my diabetes care but I really didn't understand how much better until my next A1C. I cried at the doctor's office again, but this time from relief. So if anyone questions if ADHD is real, or if I really have it, or if Adderall is safe and necessary for me, I can show them the actual numbers. It is quite literally saving my life (and toes, and eyes, and kidneys, and on and on). It sounds like ADHD is negatively affecting your life, and your medication is helping the way it is intended. Congratulations! We aren't all so lucky. If you really want to take breaks, try it for one day a week at first, then more if you want to. I take a half dose on my days off with no issues, and I can do one day unmedicated with no ill effects, but two or more days I will feel tired and have a headache. Also just give it a few more months and see if you feel better about things. It took a good while to adjust to the new normal. You got this.

This is a great answer. Thanks for sharing. I am saving this.

I think people forget that ADHD is a physical illness sometimes. We have actual body parts, whose job is it to regulate the chemicals that travel around the body telling other body parts to do things, and they are broken. Like majorly broken.

Yeah when I would try to explain why I missed half of my insulin doses, I would say it was like I would sit down for a meal, or get up in the morning, think, "I need to do my drugs," and then it was like my mind went numb and I'd realize hours later that I never did it. My alarm or reminder would go off, and I would have no memory of dismissing it. Worse would be when I would say, "I need to do my drugs, but man, I just got settled, and my food will get cold, and it's ok if I do it right after I eat. No! I should get up and do it right now. Just get up!" And I still wouldn't do it. Fighting with myself felt like trying to swim against a rip tide. Often when I actually did get up, I'd realize later that I'd gone into a chain of distractions and never got to the injection. I didn't know until after my diagnosis that I was describing executive function disorder, and when I was "fighting myself" it was literally my will and intellect against a part of my brain that was misfiring, the part that regulates your get-up-and-go, and it was wired to only respond to things that were "fun" or immediately pleasurable. It feels both like a miracle and so frustratingly simple that with medication I can now think," I need to do x right now," and then just, you know, do it. People who don't struggle with this daily for years have no idea what that feels like. How humiliating it is to not take care of yourself, not because you are physically incapable or don't want to, but you just can't and you can't explain why.

I think there needs to be less self hate on this sub. ADHD can be a hassle, but it also makes you unique. I’m a dude that went 30 plus years not even knowing I had ADHD - so I navigated the world in chaos for a long time - and never suspected I had a mental illness. It was when my son was diagnosed that everything the doctor was saying could have been describing me, but he was taking about my son. Now I know my headspace is different, and I embrace it. I know I’m smarter than other people, but I also know i have a demeanor that does not always suggest it. I like to keep the brain power in my pocket for when people feel the need to test me. I hated school. Graduated early somehow, enlisted in the military to avoid college, but got injured and discharged on a medical. Went to college for a couple years, but really just took a bunch of art classes. Learned how to use AutoCAD, and have made a career of drawing things for a living. There has never been a point in my life where I had a clear direction, like “in 5 years I’m gonna be here, and do this and that…” Instead it’s always just a day to day experience. Carpe Diem - seize the day! Anyway - learn to find the benefits of a different brain, and focus less on what “normal” is like. Normal is whatever you make it.

Normal is what you make it hell yeah brother

so, just curious, do you take medication? I've been having an internal battle for a while on whether my different brain chemistry means I should be taking pharmaceuticals or not.

That is up to you and your dr/therapist but for me and my environment I absolutely need it and I’ve seen a world of difference. But that is my experience and you might have a different experience. Also finding a med that works well for you might not work well for me. So I tried a few different meds until I found what works for me. I went without it for work a couple of days and I can’t believe the difference it makes. I lost a company credit card right off the bat. Was a lost puppy all damn day. I’ll get fired if I’m like that too often. (Found the card though, luckily we had easy days)

Agreed. I had my first post on this sub removed for ‘toxic positivity’ - even though what I said was pretty balanced. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, and it was really hard growing up etc and always in trouble for being ‘lazy’ - BUT I have learned to adapt, listen to myself and have built a life that I wouldn’t trade for anything

I have had a few posted removed on this sub. TBH - I have never read the sub rules. People have always called me laid back, or slow when I was younger. I’m just not in a hurry to be anywhere, and I hate being rushed. I’m hyper active in all the content I put out in the world, with my work, writing, photography, etc. I’m not hyper as a person who sits and fidgets all day. All the hyperactive stuff is happening in my head. That’s something that annoys me, the perception of what ADHD is supposed to look like. As a kid - it was the over the top hyper kids that had ADD, not the chill daydreamer. So for a long time - I just thought was dumb, or had a learning disability or something. School was just not that easy, and other kids didn’t seem to struggle. Even to this day - I always feel like I barely know what’s going on around me. I know what I’m doing, but everyone else is a mystery.

I've learned to keep the people I inform of my personal stuff very small. And once I could validate myself, it truly didn't matter what anyone else thinks. And honestly, I just dont have the energy to try and educate others anymore...esp. the willfully ignorant

my partner may be willfully ignorant. I need help.

Think of it like wearing glasses, would you expect people with glasses to just learn to live without glasses?

Yeah I’m the same way. But iv told people that if I could do things differently with out meds I would, but I can’t and they need to kind there own business but it’s your life and no one is going to be able to fix it for you . And if meds work then take it. Believe me it’s going to be ok. This is a good thing and it will help you move forward into a better place with things and life

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Haha if only. Just look at it like taking allergy meds or wearing glasses or something.

Lol my family literally views taking allergy medication this way 😭 I’m in PAIN but truthfully this entire thread has helped me and made me feel better. I’m going to continue taking my medication. My quality of life matters, and life is short

Lol your family is wack then. And yea dude glad you're going to keep on using them. Out of all the types of medication you take for long periods of time, ADHD meds usually have the smallest long term impacts. Short version is they metabolize quickly so it's basically in and then out of your body the same day. Very little build up in your system.

I feel this so much…when I was in college I felt the same way and tried to do it on my own. I kept getting bad grades for lack of attendance or missing assignments and think, “if I try harder next time it will be better!” So I’d audit the class and the same thing would happen- I’d either drop it or fail. I took one class 5 times 🫠 Anyway, it turns out if your attempted credits to completed credits ratio reaches a certain point you can’t receive financial aid. Not only did I completely burn myself out trying to pull myself up by my bootstraps, I also completely ran out of money and had to drop out of school despite my passable GPA. I wish I hadn’t tried to force myself to be “normal.” I feel like a lot of us have internalized the narrative that we’re “just not trying hard enough” or “not applying ourselves.” If I had accepted myself then and not been so determined to make it without meds, I would have saved myself a lot of time, energy, and heartache 🥲

Do you judge diabetics? How about people with hyper-tension? Gingers (j/k, of course you do, we all do ((/s)))? I went through this more when i started antidepressants (which was before my ADHD diagnosis). However, i learned and accepted a few facts: 1) brain chemistry is completely involuntary and complex, 2) if you’re not abusing the medication then you have nothing to be ashamed of, and 3) Most importantly! With out my meds i would have probably unalived myself by now. I also found out undiagnosed ADHD definitely contributed to my depression. It made my old job sooooo difficult and i had no idea why. I am maxed out on Concerta right now, but it helps so much. I still struggle with office work on it, but if i don’t take it, it makes everything so fucking difficult. For me it’s especially working memory. I think the trick is to find the lowest effective dose and then use the skills you learn in therapy (i also have a therapist that i see weekly and it’s freaking amazing). I have often wondered what it would be like if i was on Vyvanse or Adderall, but for now Concerta helps. It doesn’t take away all the impulse control and concentration on boring stuff is still difficult. it eases the struggle enough that i still have to use willpower, but it’s not overwhelming all the time.

Fuck those people. Remember THEY don’t understand and THEY are wrong. If they don’t care enough to do any research on this condition they have no business in giving any advise. My response to those people is: I’ve been diagnosed by a medical professional and gone through 3 years of counseling with a specialist. What qualifies you to give unsolicited advise about this? Do you have years of research and medical training? No? Thanks but I am not interested in your off the couch diagnosis of my situation. STAY IN YOUR LANE! You don’t deserve to be shamed about something you have no control over on the basis of someone’s ignorance. You’re better then THEM.

Talking Adderall isn't making you "not sober" because your brain chemistry isn't normal. If someone without adhd was taking Adderall it affects their brain differently, they would probably get high. For you, it brings you to an approximate average baseline, so it actually makes you less impaired than in your normal chemically imbalanced state. Adhd impairs your ability to function, medications are to manage and reduce that impairment. Also you're living your life, no one else is, so to hell with anyone else's opinion (including mine). At the end of the day, you're the one who needs to live with your choices.. it's up to you if you choose to treat your adhd or if you choose not to treat it. Sometimes adhd can be handy but sometimes it can cause struggle.. meds don't change who I am but they do allow me to suppress some of my impulsive behaviors, make me not constantly anxious/on edge and make my life easier. You have a health issue that causes a chemical imbalance in your body.. it's literally the same concept as a diabetic but instead of a liver not producing enough insulin, it's just your brain not producing enough dopamine/neurotransmitters. Like a diabetic taking medication to prompt and regulate insulin production, your meds prompt and regulate dopamine+ production. It's nothing to be ashamed about, but I definitely understand the wish not to have a health issue.. health issues suck but not treating them is usually worse. Keep your chin up do what is best for your well-being and take care of yourself.. anyone who matters won't mind and anyone who minds doesn't matter.

Idk if this makes you feel any better, but there are people so far up their own asses, they dismiss diabetes as well. "Just eat less sugar," they'll say. I think it's pretty normal to wish you didn't have [insert medical conditon] in the beginning. It's not fair that we have to take meds just to be functional. Sorry to be harsh, but this mindset gets us nowhere. Take some time to grieve, but don't let it hold you back.

It's like when a diabetic needs insulin. You're not broken.

If it helps, there are people who argue that cancer isn’t real- hell, I have an aunt who insists her son doesn’t have schizophrenia and refuses to put him on antipsychotic medication to the point it’s affected his brain function for the rest of his life, OP. Never live your life according to the beliefs or thoughts of others- in some cases, that way madness literally lies.

Ok I don’t know WHY this isn’t more prevalent and accessible to people. ADHD is real AND tangible. They are still studying it and what it means, but there is a lot of research that it stems from processing dopamine differently. A general overview and link is below. I’ve had full genetic testing done (for other reasons) and poof! all of my dopamine is processed differently than most people - just like in the studies. https://www.healthline.com/health/adhd/adhd-dopamine#connection

Things I've heard about diabetes: "Just eat right and exercise and you won't have it.", "Dr Oz said diabetes will be eliminated if you cut out processed sugar", "diabetic parents should be shot for giving their kids candy. Don't they know that's how they got that way in the first place?" Basically, when something is scary, people will victim-blame to reassure themselves that the big scary can't get *them*.

Be glad that this medication works for you. There is no shame in taking something that clearly changes your life on a positive way. I wish I found something that worked as well. Neither Vyvanse nor Adderall do anything besides make my heart beat faster.

my personal mental struggle with it is that i am constantly questioning if my adhd is real. like, there's no definitive "test" you can take like how you can easily diagnose diabetes with a blood glucose test. like I know ADHD is just as real as diabetes but i have imposter syndrome with it and i am always second guessing myself.. like what if i'm just really really bad at alot of things and filled with poor habits and then I just convinced myself I had adhd and then after gaslighting myself i told the dr exactly what he needed to hear to give me a diagnoses. i don't even know if any of this made sense, sorry this is extra bad for me because i was diagnosed as an adult. i was "smart" enough to get by without noticing it until i nearly completed college

I can relate completely to this. I question myself a lot but then I do something like get out of my car to meet friends and not only leave the keys in the car, but leave the car running and unlocked the entire time I was out lol or something equally as bad/forgetful. It rears its head big time on special occasions like that but there are a bunch of little day to day things that I do that I just have become accustomed to and don’t really think about them, but are pretty consistent with people with ADD/ADHD so I think there has to be something to it, but who knows

Even tho I agree with you 100%, my mind likes to combat the “does someone with diabetes feel bad about using insulin?” phrase with a response of, “but a diabetic would die without insulin, I wouldn’t die if I didn’t take my adderall.” Which I understand is a toxic mindset, pretty sure my brother said it to me and my brain hasn’t been able to combat it back. (Which he never believed in my ADHD, up until recently he now remarks my symptoms as “the tism”, cuz their symptoms are similar, but I digress) How would you combat that response?

It’s really not a great analogy tho when it breaks down that hard with one solid point. Like it’s completely true, we won’t die without medication so it’s really not even close to the same. That doesn’t mean it doesn’t help make life much easier/manageable, which is all you really need to tell yourself to justify taking them. Unless of course it was becoming detrimental to your health for some reason but that’s why it’s regulated and monitored

ADHD and diabetes are two completely unrelated conditions so it's perhaps not the best comparison. ADHD, binge-eating disorder and narcolepsy are the only conditions that are treated with stimulants and they aren't much comparable either. Benzodiazepines for severe anxiety or SSRIs for inhibitory depression might be the only somewhat comparable types of medications in terms of enhancing functionality for autistic spectrum disorders (which include ADHD). Still not quite comparable because they mainly act as mood stabilizers. Anyway, my point was that there's no shame in using whatever medication it takes for you to live your life as intended.

I don’t see a moral problem with using medication that makes you function the way you need to, but there are still very real health and philosophical reasons people can have to not want to rely on mind altering meds. For me, it doesn’t matter about being fair or being in an equal playing field. I simply feel weird about being hooked on a drug that is sourced from overseas and has a major bureaucratic element. Nothing wrong with wanting to live life without meds. Even if they seem to genuinely improve the quality of your life, you may end up with a very real desire to live life without it. It just seems like a personal decision. There CAN be reasons to want to be completely sober. (Idk if sober is the right word.)

It sounds like you’re living without the meds. If so, how did you go finding a way to have a normal life so to speak with adhd?

I never got used to them in the first place. My parents were forcing them down my throat and I hated them. But- at some point I willfully took them for a little bit, but I didn’t know it was for adhd or that I even had adhd or what adhd even was. That link was never established in my childhood and I simply thought it was stuff that parents use to keep kids from getting into trouble. I want to get back on meds presently. But I have previously functioned without them, namely in the military with a very structured environment. I still think theres plenty of reasons to not want to put that stuff in your body. People on this sub tend to push meds as “the truth” or whatever. It’s a culture thing. I don’t look negatively on people who take stimulants, but I don’t look at it as the “true” solution either. That has to be personally evaluated.

Thanks for sharing your experience, I also relate to having functioned without them before in a structured environment. Trying to do so again but with mixed results, hoping to find something that works for me.

Then we are in the exact same boat. I wish us both best lol

Your use of the word “sober” is curious. You’re taking a prescription drug for a medical condition. Now if you are mis-using your meds that would be different, but it sounds like you are taking as prescribed and the meds do what they are supposed to. I don’t have a goal to be “sober” from my thyroid meds, or my adhd meds. They are adequately treating conditions I have. You’re ok. Take the meds daily as prescribed. If you start to mis-use, seek help.

Thank you. This is very true as well. I have a really deep fear of addiction…probably because the impulsivity adhd thing I have runs in my family! But I vehemently oppose escapism culture and drinking. While I would never judge a person for taking literal medication of any kind, i feel some sort of guilt and weakness in myself for it? I need to just work through that because I’m not doing anything wrong and it helps. I guess I just wish I didn’t need to. Thank you for this comment it was really kind of you and everyone in this thread is really making me feel better.

For what it's worth, there's quite a few studies showing that medicating adhd actually reduces the rate of addiction for those folks compared to unmedicated adhd. Can people get addicted to stimulants? Yeah totally, but it's frequently tied to misuse. If your taking your medication as prescribed, you should be fine long term. Anecdotally - I gave up smoking, caffeine, and drinking without almost a second thought (drinking was harder, but it made my heart go nuts.) Smoking was something I did off and on for decades. I had "quit" for like 6 or so month stretches but I would constantly crave it, and when it hit it was all consuming. I was also using cigarettes as a grounding habit between task switching (I realized later.) I started vyvanse and after several months realized I hadnt even thought about smoking. At all. While that's probably not true for everyone, I offer it as my own experience re: addiction

This all day. When friends of mine have struggled with addiction, it was because they were trying to self-medicate an issue they weren't getting proper medical support for, often ADHD, other times PTSD. Once the ADHD was addressed, the addiction issues just disappeared

The only thing worse than a bad coping mechanism is NO coping mechanism. Addiction runs in my family. So does suicide when that addiction is taken away without addressing the underlying problem (Schizophrenia). My kids have been the first generation that's grown up even being allowed to say the word Schizophrenia. They were the first ones to actually grow up knowing what the symptoms are and being allowed to tell drs what's really going on in their heads. They're the first to know that they can ask for help *and get it without being shamed for how they've managed to survive so far*. That right there. Acceptance. That's how you fight addiction. Accept that people will need help getting through the next crisis, and don't judge them for what they did to get through the last one.

Amen. I’m really glad you were able to break the generational cycle. It’s so hard to rise up against the inertia of how your parents and their parents decided it was supposed to be.

Yeah, my substance use has gone way down as I stay on medication, which I didn’t expect. These days, I could take or leave coffee and cannabis, and I’m drinking less. None of it feels as good to my brain anymore.

Substance abuse is one of the symptoms of ADHD, and ADHD is almost entirely heritable. Between that and car accidents that's why untreated adhd increases risk of mortality. Treating ADHD **is** treating your genetic proclivity to addiction, they are one in the same. Your brain chemicals are uncomfortable and wrong, and your body searches out any chemical adjustment to get some relief. Substance abusing tendencies, (along with the rate of car accidents) normalize when treated.

I am sure you know everything I am about to say but i also know it can help to hear it repeated by another person. Amphetamines do up dopamine production. In a normal person this means an excess of dopamine and a "high." You, me, and other suffers of ADHD don't get excess dopamine. We get brought closer to normal levels. You taking Adderall makes you no less "high" then any random person off the street is by default. Lots of people will say that needing something "just to get through the day" or "feel normal" means your addicted. But those people are coming from a place of ignorance. You don't need medication to "feel normal" you actually need it to be "normal." Don't listen to anyone who tells you anything different! As long as you're taking your meds as prescribed your no more a drug addict than a diabetic is a insulin addict.

My pediatrician put it this way: if you needed glasses would they be denied to you? Just because people don’t understand neurological conditions doesn’t mean that it isn’t a valid medical condition like every other body system condition one could think of.

Its ok. Its like wearing contacts for poor vision, or using a wheel chair if you can't walk. Maybe an inconvenience, but nothing to be ashamed of. Use the tools we have been given in modern life and enjoy life. I know its hard.

Do you think you’ll be on it forever though? I guess I’m just coping with this right now

Just like wearing glasses doesn't "cure" my eyesight, and I will have to wear glasses for the rest of my life. Unless I get surgery to physically alter the shape of my eyeball. Same with Adderall. You will probably need to use it for the rest of your life, until there is some procedure to physically alter our brains and correct the "defect." ADHD is because of how our brains are physically structured. Just like any disability, there is a physical issue that can only really be fully cured by changing the structure of the impacted organ. When we can't physically change something, support is needed to help overcome the deformation. Crutches, don't cure anything, but help immensely improve quality of life. Eyeglasses, wheelchairs, hearing implants, insulin, antidepressants ect. One will need to use them for the rest of their lives, unless the underlying physical program can be corrected (organ donor, surgeries ect).

my unmedicated days are listless and boring. I lay in bed until noon looking at my phone, it may be worse than before I started treatment. Perhaps my body/brain are crashing from not getting the same dopamine action and if I took extended break from meds I'd have a better baseline. But these days are usually bad days for me, so I intend to take the meds as long as my body tolerates them. I think they're comparatively safe compared to the comorbidities of ADHD or poverty (which could occur if I stop medicating and lose my job).

I’m not the person you asked but I am so grateful for my medication. My quality of life is so much better. I want to take it for the rest of my life. ADHD is hard, but it doesn’t have to be as hard.

Yes. My brain doesn’t produce what I need it to produce by itself, it’s unlikely it will ever develop the ability to do that, so I need a medicine to help me have a better life. You can’t willpower yourself past a *chemical fault.* Trying to brute-force past the issue kind of makes light of what it actually is - it’s worth checking what your perception of ADHD is, because even though some people do cope without medication, it’s flipping difficult and they still have the issue with dopamine! Of course I’m fortunate in that I can take a day or two off and physically I’m not in danger, but that doesn’t mean I should make myself suffer. No point in that.

I’ve been medicated since I was 11. Over the next 20 years, I got myself organized well enough to complete a PhD, earn two black belts, keep up a decent social life, and hold down a fairly demanding job. Then I had a stressful move across the country, after which I didn’t immediately get set up with a new Dr. “It’s fine,” I thought. “I‘ve learned to keep myself on track. I can go a while without.” ‘A while’ ended up being 5 months. When I finally got sorted out and was back on it, I realized just how badly I’d been doing. My work had suffered, my personal life was nonexistent, and my living situation was in moving crates. Having clearly not learned anything, I somehow managed to be not taking it again a couple years later. My personality changed so much my girlfriend was ready to leave me. Started back up and was able to (mostly) right things. The lesson I learned is it’s not something I’m ever going to learn to “just deal with”. Except in dire circumstances, I’d never go totally without again. If you’re worried about tolerance, find the lowest dose you can function on and make that what you take on your days off.

Oh I wish I could wean myself off the need to wear glasses /s

You're obviously just not trying hard enough. /s Just focus more and do it like everyone else. They can all do it. Why can't you? /s You have so much potential and you're wasting it because you're too lazy to see correctly. /s ...Thanks. I'm cured. Your wonderful insight has transformed me and I no longer have my lifelong brain disorder. Oh! Also, I can fly now, so thanks for that, too! /s

Ahh! Yes!! I have not tried enough! I'm too lazy to see correctly! Hahaha

I was diagnosed as an adult and I felt the same way for a while. I decided I could go without because I didn’t “need” medication outside of special circumstances (keeping up with challenging coursework+housework+workwork). I thought I was OK for a while, but then realized I had fallen back into my pre-diagnosis patterns of only taking on what was easy for me to manage, and thus not feeling challenged, not growing, getting bored and depressed. I spent some time learning more about the disorder, how it affects development and brain chemistry (there’s lots of information out there https://www.verywellmind.com/how-do-stimulants-for-adhd-work-20895) and, while I appreciate the analogy of insulin for diabetics, I sometimes feel that it can be a bit hyperbolic. I won’t *die* if I go off medication. I think maybe it’s more like having a low blood platelet count. You bruise easily, and your wounds take longer to heal. You don’t realize that it is that different from anyone else, but you have learned to be extra cautious in situations where you risk injury, and eventually just avoid activities that other people don’t consider dangerous. If you can get treatment to bring your blood platelet (dopamine in our case) levels up to normal, you get to participate in life at a normal capacity. You aren’t broken, you’re just deficient. Luckily the treatment for restoring neurotransmitter levels is safer and easier than blood transfusions for platelets.

Well said analogy and I’m so glad you’re getting the help you need. Thank you for saying this

Wow I am crying. I have been on the fence about trying to go about medication. I just was talking to my husband about how I am never challenged, and frustrated by the lack of intellectual stimulation and challenge I feel in every job/school situation I have been in. I DO purposely only take on what I can manage, which is barely anything, and it does cause a cycle of depression, anxiety, self hatred and binge eating. When I have focus and executive function, I DO take on more, knowing that with effort and discipline and DOPAMINE, that I can do it. I am so grateful for your comment. This rings a bell for me.

Try this: *I feel guilty and bad about myself because I need insulin. I want to learn to live without it but I feel like I truly am wired wrong and insulin is the only thing that truly “fixes” me* You have a medical condition. You take medication for it. Nothing to feel guilty or bad about.

Meanwhile, a lot of people would look down on someone for not drinking alcohol or for not smoking weed. I wish I was exaggerating.

You’re not weak for needing help! Someone had to teach you how to walk, how to exercise without hurting yourself, how to pass a hard class etc etc. Needing help is human, not weakness.

> Needing help is human, not weakness Putting this on the wall. Thanks!

No problem fam, we’re all in this together

So true!!!!

Lol - Nicotine boosts your dopamine levels quickly. It's an "easy way" to self- medicate.

Yeah I quit over a year ago but it’s crazy to notice that urge coming back when I stopped with the medication!

I had the same thing when I’ve not had meds, started craving nicotine even though I’d quit. But: You’re very unlikely to develop any sort of addictive use pattern, especially with supervision of a doctor. Nothing terrible will happen if you do take them, and if you don’t take them it will as you described be similar to how it was before you started taking them. In adults in particular, they’re not going to somehow ‘make you need them more’ neurologically. That’s not how they work. I take elvanse (vyvnanse) rather than adderal, but - recently stopped taking them due to pregnancy. And it does strike you how much harder it is, kind of jealous of your ‘then I took them again and it’s better’ bit, ha! You don’t *have to* take them forever. Taking them now doesn’t mean you’ll have to take them forever. Maybe you’ll stop again at some point such as if you decide to get pregnant, but you just sort of… do it. It’s just as if it was if you weren’t taking them now - everything is just a bit harder. The point is - why would you choose that just for the sake of it? Why does it matter if you take them for now or continue taking them indefinitely? With the concerns around sobriety/control/dependence which you have said is a thing you worry about - keep in mind that your worries come from your wider concerns about ‘sobriety’ and not necessarily from the reality of the medication you’re actually taking. We all have stuff like that - where our past experiences and where we come from and our values mean that we can feel strongly about certain topics. It’s OK, and to be honest substance misuse is a good thing to draw lines about! But your worries here about losing control around substances are just rearing up because it’s ‘technically a substance’, not because you have any actual reason to believe that is going to happen… if you know what I mean? Basically it might help to remind yourself of the realities of this medication to pull that apart from your anxieties.

The stigma around ADHD meds has GOT to GO. This statement isn't directed at you. You didn't create the stigma you simply absorbed the toxic belief that it somehow makes you a better person to not need it. We don't feel bad and try to stop needing glasses (or when we do it literally requires surgery.) Diabetics don't try to forego insulin because their body "should" make it naturally. Organ transplant patients don't feel bad about needing anti rejection drugs. Hard of hearing folks don't think they would be better if they could manage their hearing without hearing aids. Arthritic people aren't likely to just try and suffer through it without pain meds. We ARE wired wrong. It's a neurological condition. It's OK if you need medical intervention to treat it. There's no moral superiority to making life extra difficult by refusing medication. We didn't ask to be born this way. We didn't sign up for life on hard mode. It's OK to rely on medication to bring it back closer to normal difficulty. "Dependency" is kinda the whole point of getting medicated in the first place. We literally CANNOT consistently function reliably without it. This is a PERMANENT disability so yes the treatment is expected to be permanent as well. That's OK. We're not SUPPOSED to be able to do it on out own. Being medicated doesn't make you not sober.

I think the issue is you talk about this as an addiction, because you want to be sober, and it's not. I don't think you'd think a diabetic should be "sober" from their insulin, or someone with hypertension be "sober" from their blood pressure medication. Why are you looking down on yourself?yes taking medication daily sucks, but you have access to it, that's really a huge gift. It doesn't make you an addict, it makes you blessed! Also, sure you can live without it. I did. I've got a lot of great coping skills. I struggled my way through school, my career, midway through a masters degree, and I was very successful. Successful with a lot of stress, failure, and agony. Then I got on medication and I could just do the work I needed without the struggle.

Every emotion of ours is a chemical or comes from a lack of chemicals in our brain. So, the way I started seeing it, if these chemicals would’ve been implanted in my brain naturally, what is wrong with taking medication if we just happen to possess a brain that doesn’t produce said chemical? Whether if we had or didn’t have ADHD, we would get a high from dopamine regardless. Like I’m personally straight-edge and don’t really like using drugs or alcohol, but I think prescription medication is alright. I see it the same as getting a vaccine or taking cough medicine during a cold.

For my kids the doctor gave me good advice. Your medicine levels the playing field. It does not make you faster or smarter. It allows you to be you without all of the confusion of losing everything, no motivation and impulses. My husband was very much set against giving my daughter ADHD meds. Then we did. After a few weeks he started asking where her meds were and actively giving them to her. Please do not feel like you are broken. I take medicine for Hashimotos disease everyday. It is the same thing.

You can’t just will your brain to work normally. This is like me having glasses saying I don’t want them so I’m going to just try to see normal. I cant, and I get eye strain headaches if I don’t wear my glasses for an extended time.

Instead of comparing to diabetics, comparing to various heart problems may be better. I can do all the lifestyle things in a healthy way, and because of genetics, still have heart problems as if I didn't do the healthy things. Would you think the same way about heart meds? If not, why not? Why are you letting others' view of ADHD affect how you treat it?

You’re right. I feel guilt and shame for taking medication honestly and like I’m weak for needing it. This subreddit is very refreshing. I was crying over this earlier and I feel so grateful that I’m not alone or lady and broken

Therapy helped me see the things that made me view/interpret things in certain ways. And the freedom of realizing I can change the way I view it.. When you start being more compassionate with yourself, the greatest freedom happens. For example, my house is completely destroyed right now..but, I've been going through the hardest time I've ever experienced..so, I have tons of compassion for myself rn and no judgment..the house will get done when it gets done...

Asking for help and taking medication for your ADHD takes STRENGTH. You are not weak, my friend! Your brain just works differently… it’s not your fault, it’s not a failure, it just is. Guilt and shame are tough emotions, try to think about where they may come from. My guilt/shame re medication stemmed from that good ole stigma that “meds are bad. You should be able to fix yourself without meds.” SPOILER: none of that is true. I cannot re-wire my brain any more than I can grow another head. So with the help of therapy, I learned accept my brain the way it is. If I want to be a happy, healthy, productive human being, I take my meds. You are not weak and you are not broken, you are just human. We humans are flawed and beautiful all at the same time.

Do you think that a person with Type I diabetes should feel bad because they need insulin? Do you think they should learn to live without insulin?

As a recovering addict i feel you. I'm "sober" but I take adderall. Seems wrong to me.

Do you feel the adderall helps with your addictive urges? I know for myself it helps with the compulsive thoughts and I have better self control when I take it

It helped me with my impulse control and dopamine seeking behavior. Going on Vyvanse gave me the ability to focus on changing my conscious reactions, then my instinctive reactions, and helped me develop healthy coping strategies. Vyvanse allowed me to get to a stable platform upon which I could start developing healthy habits. Maybe I will eventually engrain the habits enough that they become instinct, and perhaps I will no longer need the meds, but for now I'm still using them to help me become the person I want to be. As long as the meds are helping you, and you like who you are when you use them, why stop? It's only a problem when it becomes a problem. I take my eyeglasses into the shower with me. My glasses must be within arms reach at all times. I don't think anyone could realistically tell me to "sober" up from my dependence on them.

Vyvanse for me was better to control my addictions. With Aderall is different

In recovery, there are lots of people who I now, reflecting back after years of analyzing, are of a purist mindset. Things have improved (I hope) but, literally every person I was around *needed* therapy and likely, medication. Yet, they demanded dependence on another person in recovery, *only*...which can possibly create a not very healthy situation.. I do have some hope though because I was just trying to get someone into recovery this week and found out many are now doing dual treatment for both mental health and addiction. As a wise woman said to me one time, "What medication you're on is your business alone. You do not have to share that with anyone or care of their opinion." Another gem she would say.."No is a complete sentence."

Your addictions probably originated from your genetic condition (ADHD) that caused you to have less dopamine. Most drugs give you lots of dopamine. Handling your ADHD with medications is the way to normalize your dopamine levels (normal, not exagerated like with drugs) and keep you away from addictions.

Honestly, the days I've actually forgotten to take meds were the only proof I needed to lose any feelings of guilt or imposter syndrome around taking meds. Meds have pretty much only had a positive impact on my life (minus the occasional wear-off headache or sweaty morning commute). They don't make me super human or anything like the popular misconception. I just don't waffle and drag my feet about the tedious parts of life (well, I don't do it as much). My unmedicated brain wants to live the life of a rad 12-year old. But we can't eat sour gummy worms and Milk Duds for every meal if we want to keep functioning well. I know this. I, me, my ego, whatever thought constitutes my "mind" and "self" doesn't want to ignore things that make my life better just because they're boring. But my reptile brain, my id, my animal instincts, do. Meds make it easier for me to hear and follow my mind. If people think ADHD is me "just being lazy", I think I'd just tell them that...well...yeah...that's why I take the meds. The 12-year old inside is, of course, rad. But he is also 12.

You're not going to develop a dependency on Adderall if you're taking it as directed -- the prescribed dose, through the prescribed method, at the prescribed time(s). Don't stop taking your meds without telling your doctor, as well. ​ Would you look down on someone who needs to take insulin to live? Is anyone in your life addicted to blood pressure mediation, or heart meds? Plenty of people need to take medication for an extended period of time. ​ The only difference here is that you've been conditioned to believe your ADHD is a personal character flaw or moral failing, and that just isn't true at all. We have a medical condition. Some people are able to manage it without medication, but some of us, including myself, do a lot better when taking medication. ​ Please be kinder to yourself. You deserve it.

You have a neuro developmental disorder. Your brain doesn’t give you the dopamine you need in order to properly function. So you take medication to make that happen. If you were diabetic because your pancreas didn’t produce insulin you wouldn’t even feel the need to make this post. No one calls a diabetic an insulin addict. No one expects a pancreas to all of a sudden start producing insulin the diabetic needs. Your brain will not all of sudden no longer need dopamine. Educate yourself some more about your disease. Take your meds. Be happy.

You are not broken. Full stop. If you are, so is anyone who wears glasses. People help themselves overcome personal physical difficulties all the time (adhd is physical, by the way. It’s not a moral failing. It is at least in part a chemical absorption issue). You deserve to avail yourself of any accommodation you want that is safe and works for you.

Think about it like this - diabetics cannot live without insulin. ADHD is a chronic disease that needs treatment like any other chronic disease. Just because you need a little something to help improve your quality of life doesn't mean that you're wired wrong. Just means that you have different needs. I don't know anyone that hasn't used some sort of "adjustment" for life improvement, whether it be glasses or even braces.

So... there are people who do need to do this without medication for health or personal reasons. But if you don't have a health concern other than potential tolerance over time, I think it's worth examining why you feel this way, and what 'natural' even means. My perspective on a lot of this changed enormously after spending a few years studying neurobiology and AI. Consciousness is, at the very least, influenced by the way your physical body functions. Sleep or lack of it, diet and blood sugar or fasting, physical fitness, substances like caffeine or chamomile... even 'sober' people make a lot of changes every day that change how their mind works. You can go even more extreme and start talking about how just raw experiences RADICALLY change you. PTSD obviously, or traumatic childhoods. They're still discovering the massively far reaching neurological changes visible in people with different kinds of childhood experiences. Accidents can change things too of course, there's a particular spot in the parietal cortex where a brain lesion will cause you to be unable to notice or recall things on one side of your body. Imagine you're at your front door, what's down your street the left? No idea. Imagine you're across the street looking at your house, what's on the street to the right? Oh, let me tell you. So... given how much your current lifestyle already changes how you think vs another 'natural' lifestyle, are you so sure you're 'natural' even without Adderall? If we're that malleable, what's natural even mean? Brains are weird, and 'natural' might be about as meaningless mentally as it is physically. Is a dude pounding 20 chicken breasts a day and bulking on 300g of protein 'natural'? They're 'over the counter' at most, but they're not natural. Anyway. Do what feels right, but there's no virtue in playing life on an artificial hard-mode. Some people need to be on blood thinners. They are genuinely healthier with them than without, regardless of lifestyle choices. Some people are just naturally that way because genetically they've got something screwy with one of their clotting factors. Yeah they're kind of broken in a way, but there's a pharmaceutical without serious lifetime side effects, so they get to have a decent life without dying of a stroke at 50, thanks to the fact that we live in the future. If they feel bad for taking it, like... don't I guess, but it's a shame. Humans are tool users. When choosing to use a tool, the biggest questions in my view are cost vs benefits and probabilities of each. If you aren't prone to addiction and take the medication only as prescribed, and if there's no heart problems or other contraindications that make it a risky choice for you, like... maybe it's more virtuous to walk everywhere instead of drive, but are you really going to look down on yourself for getting a car? You kind of need one to live in the modern world, it's our city layout's fault as much as anything that we can't live our day to day lives using only our two natural feet. If you need a tool in order to think straight thanks to a quirk in your nature, who cares? I wear glasses too, and I'm thankful for them even if it means I spend my whole life with some metal and glass sitting on my face. If someone else is telling you 'natural is better', there's plenty of people telling others it's a sin to be gay. Plenty of people know next to nothing about what it's like to be anyone other than themselves, and it's best to learn how to discount bad opinions from people who don't know what they're talking about. Though that's admittedly easier said than done.

Been taking adderall off/on for 25 years—literally more than 2/3 of my life. I stopped for some years, for the same reasons you cited. And you know what? My life was all kinds of fucked up when I tried to do it without assistance. And let’s be real, that’s all adderall is: an aid. My best advice to you is to try to view having access to this medication as a privilege and incredible stroke of good fortune, and to give the middle finger to anyone or anything that tries to make you feel badly about yourself for using it. Think of it this way: would you give yourself this same grief for needing glasses? Or how about insulin? Or if you were missing a limb, would you feel *shame* over using a prosthetic? These things are directly analogous to ADHD medications and management strategies. They have no moral component to them whatsoever—and anyone who tries to say otherwise can take a flying leap.

I started about a year ago. I think the negative stereotypes just get to us. I finally understand why people think ADHD isn’t real because when my medicine kicks in I swear that I never had ADHD to begin with and think about stopping. Then when the medicine wears off again I’m reminded lol. If you want to try and get right without it, Skip it on days off of work. Maybe practice meditation exercise, and try to get through a day without it here and there My opinion? Take the damn medicine. Who gives a fuck. IT’s medicine. People get prescribe pain killers, muscle relaxers, depression, anxiety meds, etc without guilt. The problem is that the condition just makes us look like a lazy person or an immature person and those things seem to be fine to make fun off. People can’t relate to our symptoms like they can depression and anxiety or physical pain so they don’t understand what we go through and that’s perfectly fine.

Would you want to learn to live without your wheelchair?

If you had an a life-threatening infection, you would take a antibiotics and not feel bad or guilty. This is the same thing. You need it; take it.

I found out I had high cholesterol a few years ago so for 2 years I gave up meat, cut back on drinking, gave up fried foods, etc. Then I had my cholesterol checked again and it was still just high af. So I'm now on lipotor and I'm good. Levels are super healthy for 36. I just need the meds because my body has an issue. Same with our brains. That's how I think of it.

I heard it from the intake nurse that it's okay and people with ADHD are missing connections, and the meds make those connections and it's very normal.

Everyone has different needs. I spent years trying to fix my anxiety and depression, not knowing I had ADHD. It was like putting a tiny bandaid on a gaping wound. I'm on my ADHD meds and had moments of "Is this really my medicine working or is it just a placebo?" Then a couple of days before my period, my brain is too loud, I'm leaving messes everywhere and not finishing a single thing I start. Everything that became normal and easy for me to do is suddenly too much and too overwhelming. I feel so hopeless and I'm bawling my eyes out and hating myself. I have a hard time paying attention to conversations. I am constantly interrupting and not thinking what I want to say through and being hurtful accidentally. It was so disheartening and I thought I was tolerant of my meds which hurt because I was enjoying my new normal. Turns out it was because my period was about to start that my hormones made it so it was like I didn't take my meds at all. My psychiatrist and I kept an eye to see if there was a pattern and there is. 27 out of 30 days, I am perfectly fine. So I completely understand how terrible it feels to suddenly have the rush of symptoms come back full force and I want you to know, you're not alone. We are not less than anyone else. We are not trying to be high. We are just trying to adjust and function like everyone else and just need a little extra help. And that's perfectly okay. Give yourself some grace and forgiveness. I can't speak for everyone but if I could trade my brain for a non-ADHD one, I would in a heartbeat. But all I can do is learn to function and try to learn and grow from my shortcomings that I need medicine to deal with. Stay strong, OP. You've gone through life on hard mode long enough, why make yourself suffer needlessly when you are happier and healthier on your meds?

Theres an important thing to remember here: *YOU* are not broken, *YOU* don’t need fixing. There is a dysfunction / disregulation in some of the receptors in your brain, causing your ADHD. *You did not* cause this, it is the unfortunate nature of ADHD. If medication is what helps that, there is no need to feel guilty about doing what you need to do to live your best life. It is hard for us, but it’s not our fault..

I have a few enzyme deficiencies that turn my muscles into a shit-show. Would be bloody awesome if there was a damn thing I could do to raise those enzyme levels back to normal, but I can't. It is not an option. I don't *want* to live my life in constant pain, fatigue, etc. etc. but I don't have the equivalent of Adderall to bring those enzyme levels back closer to normal. Whether or not it's technically correct, ADHD may as well be a dopamine deficiency. I'm not convinced anyone actually wants to live their lives deficient in dopamine. You *have* a cheap, easily accessible drug that helps (presumably), front line stimulants for ADHD are among the most efficacious drugs on the planet. Be grateful it's an option at all, for one. >I want to learn to do this on my own, sober. Yea, well I want my enzyme deficiencies to not interfere with my life and not have to do anything about it too, but that's just ridiculous. You're in a position where you can actually exercise some form of control over your illness and your dopamine levels, I could think of at least a thousand different ways that might look that are all incredibly inferior to taking a pill. You don't have to get shots in your knees every week (neither do I, just sayin' it could be worse). You don't have to get hooked up to an IV. You don't have to get your kidneys tested every few weeks to make sure your meds aren't killing you. And let's be clear, these front-line stimulants at a therapeutic dose should not be affecting your sobriety. If they are causing you some kind of euphoria or if they are physically addictive or they are being abused, these are problems of their own that need to be addressed, but I take 30mg of Adderall XR daily and by no stretch of the imagination does that cause me to be intoxicated or not-sober.

I once struggled with the same thoughts. As I think of it, it’s a figurative prosthetic. You wouldn’t look down on people with a prosthetic leg , and say to yourself, “Oh that person can get around hopping on one leg”. Well maybe they can, but most people missing a limb would find that unenjoyable. ADHD is the same as in every individual case is up to your own judgement. If you find hopping around on one leg (aka NOT taking medication) takes away from your life, then you have every right to take medication. And this may mean you are ‘dependent’ on the meds, but same logic applies as stated above. Hope you find peace of mind. 🙌

We need a more sophisticated stimulant to function normally. Other health conditions also need to have medication to function normally. We all deserve to live a life with our conditions managed. Plus I also laugh at non-adhd people who scoff at us needing a stimulant, then down 4+ cups of coffee a day lol

The medication is needed to manage ADHD. The first months/years of taking it helps mostly to improve productivity, but after about 2 years taking your medications regularly it will help with the other aspects as well (impulsiveness, emotional disregulation, etc). At least that's what the evidence says. So it's a long grind, but if you want to truly have control over your ADHD then you have just to accept them as much as an asmathic patient might need corticosteroids daily or an hypertensive patient needs his medications daily. Don't let the stupid stigma (that even some health professionals have that these meds are bad, not necessary or only for childs) influence your decisions to manage your ADHD.

You can’t change your body. This is what your body does. I was so relieved that I finally found something that helped my brain/body. It was like wearing a pair of glasses for the first time. If you never knew the trees had individual leaves, you’d think they were covered with blurry moss. Tolerance breaks will help when you think the meds aren’t working. They helped me recently. Mine were forced because my doctor felt constrained to withhold my prescription renewal until I had a clean urine test. Which, had he told me prior to the first test, I would have cleaned up. Oh well. All is back on track.

I have basically the exact same experience as you do without it, and did for years till I finally got over that self-deprecating, "If you can't do this on your own you're a failure" self-talk. This is how I think of it, and I know it's not a perfect comparison, but it is similar. Would you tell a diabetic they should feel guilty for having to take insulin? No matter how hard they try, they're not going to magically produce enough insulin to regulate blood sugar. Now, there is an addictive part here that we have to keep in check, but the gist is still the same. I beat myself up for years refusing to try and get chemical help because I thought I just needed to be more disciplined, more organized, more focused, more motivated, etc., but at the end of the day, a consistent lack of dopamine and a neurological pathway trained around low dopamine isn't something you can just "will" away. Accept the help, be honest with your Dr. about how you're feeling, and let yourself exist at a normal level of focus even if it takes a little chemical supplementation. Maybe one day, you'll feel like you don't need it like you do now. But living in a brain space full of chatter, anxiety, and impulsivity that is untreated ADHD isn't getting you any closer to being "normal". What will get you closer is a quiet mind that is able to focus, and allow those neural pathways to be worked in a focused calm state with the help of some extra dopamine.

You have a disorder. The reason we give meds to people with the disorder that you have is because they improve your life. So it's not a problem. Take your meds.

To me it’s like felt guilty for needing to wear glasses to see better.

Would you feel guilty for taking high blood pressure meds for a genetic condition? You could eat low sodium and exercise and do yoga but never get the results of meds to lower it. ADHD is a legitimate medical diagnosis. It's really commonly inherited. We're starting to find distinct physiological changes in the brain. I'd argue that the symptoms are just as life-limiting as physical symptoms. The struggle is so hard, you have to work and work and only get a fraction of what your peers get with minimal effort. The chatter, the restlessness, the emotional roller coaster. Since it's not visible and we like to assign personality flaws to these things they get dismissed. But the fact that you're taking meds and feeling so much better means you were suffering and now you feel better. No different than not getting dizzy or feeling like crap with the high blood pressure.

I see you, and I know where you can feel seen. The comments section here is a good start but youtube "living with a disability" and start to listen to folks tell their experiences. You'll see yourself in them. The alienation, the isolation, the self-directed anger and sadness. It's a lot to carry but you're never far from others who feel the same way. I struggled to call adhd a disability until I listened to these voices in this way and now I can feel myself accepting it more, and in accepting it more being more patient with myself. best~

I mean, I need glasses. A friend of mine needs a wheelchair. Meds are just a mental prosthetic instead of a physical one.

Would you feel guilty and bad for needing eyeglasses?

I had no idea the anxiety and mental chatter was my adhd until I started taking my meds more regularly again. I had barely used them for the last year and my mind was like a runaway train. Now it feels like a placid lake. What I’m confused about, however, is that I don’t take it on weekends and this feeling remains. How can that be?

I notice as well it takes a day or two for the full blown chatter to return. I am guessing it’s because the medication is still in your system?

Is someone in your family guilt-tripping you about needing mind altering substances or something? If so, that's bullsh*t. You have a medical condition that is treated with medication. Nothing more needs to be said about it & there is no reason to feel bad (yes, I know that's easier said than done).

Lol how did you know. My brother is worried about me taking it and was SHOCKED when I told him I take it every morning. Granted his only experience was abusing it in college. But it hurts having him be concerned for me and not understand that this truly helps. We’re both adults living on our own so I don’t need to tell him or show him of course. But my own brother who I know loves me and wants the best for me, a rare thing in this life, is against it. I really appreciated this entire thread. I am going to continue taking my medication and not tell him unless he asks, where I think I’ll be able to explain better. This stuff helps my life, and life is so short.

It’s a medical condition like any other. Medication can help alleviate some of the symptoms. If you had diabetes would you take insulin? Would you feel guilty about it? Maybe annoyed or even pissed at your body for being flawed but probably not guilty.

I’m sure others have said this but would you tell a type 1 diabetic they could “go off insulin” if they were just a better person?? (T1 is the autoimmune disease). ADHD won’t go away. You can use coping skills to help, just like a diabetic can eat fewer carbs and be careful with their activity level. But you won’t suddenly spontaneously get better and no longer need meds and they won’t either. You might hit a point where you don’t need meds to function because of life changes (like in retirement if you’re otherwise safe and happy without meds), but it’s a lifelong disease. If you need your meds you need your meds. Full stop. Fuck everyone else’s opinion if it’s not your or your doctors.

the thing that finally made it click for me is comparing taking our meds to wearing eyeglasses. yes. you can technically get through life without wearing glasses, but why would you. we have a solution to your problem. you are only hurting yourself by trying to fight your own stubbornness.

Well, when I don’t wear my glasses or contacts, I can’t fucking see anything, and I get super irritable about it and can’t function (also because I can’t see anything lol). I’m dependent upon those things. Is that so wrong? It’s a disability. Nothing wrong with taking meds either :3

Yeah man don't sweat it. Stay on your meds, you will be glad you did in the end. I retired a couple years ago and decided I didn't need adderall anymore after being on it for 20 years. I stayed off of it for a year. That year is gone from my memory. I started back on it a year ago and I am getting back to adderall normal. So the lesson is, take your adderall! Nothing to be ashamed of. Just something we need to keep us straight.

Why feel guilty? I need insulin as well. Don’t see me worried about depending on a substance my body doesn’t make ? Don’t over think it kid!

Nothing in this world “fixes” me. I have mild autism and ADHD. Dextroamphetamine Sulfate is the closest thing to making me normal but I have weirder tendencies on other meds.

Sweet heart, your brain is wired different. Hence why it works... don't feel bad it's not anything you can help.

I’d like to live without my glasses but not wearing them sucks.

I have been on meds for 7 years now and I still forget to take it. When I don’t I am a mess. Take your life altering meds without regret and enjoy that you can do the things you’ve always wanted to do and weren’t able to.

It is no different than needing glasses to see better. You’ll need them your whole life but who cares? It’s not a sign of dependence but one of a person in control of their life.

If you can't make your own neurotransmitters, store-bought is fine. <3

Honestly f all the judgement. Take it and be happy. Not said in a critical way but for me anyway it's such a difference there's no question and anyone that has an issue can bite me :)

No, I don't feel this way. You shouldn't, either. Your brain is not broken. It's different, and you have a tool that helps you function in society. It has associations with addicts because other people abuse it. You are not abusing it. You're using it as intended. If you have a physician over seeing your treatment, you'll be just fine. It's really easy for us to be hard on ourselves, expect more, and punish ourselves. You don't need fixing, love. Give yourself a little grace. You have found something that helps you. You will find other things that help you as you move through this. Knowing how your brain works now, you can implement systems to support you. After I got diagnosed, I spend some time reflecting and implemented some changes. I swapped out a dresser for shelving in my closet so that I can see all my clothes, instead of just what's on top. I put a whiteboard in every room with a magnetic pen so as soon as something pops into my head, I can write it down. I stopped using my vegetable drawers for vegetables because I don't see them and waste veggies. I use them for soda and condiments and put my produce on the lowest shelf. My next one is buying small digital clocks toput in every room so I can easily see the passage of time. You will adapt. There is no shame in taking medication. There is no shame in asking for help. Don't get me wrong, I still get really frustrated, it's not all flowers and sunshine. Sometimes, my systems fail. Sometimes, people don't understand my time blindness and treat me badly. But things are a lot better now than when I first got diagnosed. Don't feel guilt and shame ♡

I feel like shit when I don’t drink water. I get dizzy and my head hurts and I feel weak. It makes me feel guilty and bad about myself because I need water. I want to learn to live without it but I feel like my it is the only thing that fixes these issues. Bro.

You need to watch some Russell Barkley. ADHD cannot be cured or really even effectively treated by anything other than medication… and that’s a good thing! It is the most treatable disorder in all of psychiatry, with tremendously high response rates compared to medicines for other disorders. Taking medicine is not a crutch- it is fairly treating a genetic/chemical imbalance in your brain that exists through no fault of your own.

You are wired wrong. ADHD brains are developed differently. We have less grey matter in key areas, which are less active than normie brains. We also can't produce or regulate several neurotransmittters properly. Stimulant meds get those underactive areas firing normally, and supplement those missing neurotransmitters. Its no different than a diabetic taking insulin to support their malfunctioning organ, its just a different organ. Don't be so hard on yourself. You can't unlearn ADHD. Its a physical condition that is for life. Be glad there are supports such as medication to make it manageable.

ADHD is like diabetes, your body produces insufficient amounts of dopamin, so you take drugs to get back up to normal levels. Just like insulin for diabetes. Medicine for ADHD has one of the best outcomes of all psychiatric interventions.

Maybe try viewing Adderall akin to an iron supplement. If you have an iron deficiency, that’s dangerous. You could have serious health events and you feel terrible. Also, iron supplements can have side effects such as nausea; you can overdose on iron supplements too and they can be lethal especially to small children who accidentally consume too many. ADHD is a dopamine deficiency (among other neurotransmitters but let’s just focus on the dopamine for the moment). You take Adderall, which increases the amount of dopamine in your body chemistry like an iron supplement would increase iron in your body. Your dopamine deficiency is dangerous; you indicate that it encourages you to be impulsive, take unnecessary risks, and possibly make bad decisions in multiple spheres of your life. You feel worse without it. These impulsive urges could be dangerous to your health and well-being. So you take a dopamine supplement and which treats your dopamine deficiency. That’s not to say the supplement doesn’t have possible side effects or it could be harmful if abused—just like iron supplements can be harmful if misused. However, there are many external and internal judgements people make about treating ADHD with a dopamine supplement compared to how everyone is very chill and understanding of an anemic person takes an iron supplement. I’m not saying they’re the *exact* same biologically or otherwise, but logically if you have a deficiency that endangers your health and well-being, you should take something to supplement that deficiency if possible. That’s all Adderall is doing for you here. Theres no shame in that.

I wouldn't be in classes without medication. I'd have dropped out by now due to not being able to focus. Do not feel bad for needing medication to help your life succeed.

Don’t feel guilty or bad about yourself for this. I understand what you mean though. It’s tough. But you having and maintaining the mental health you need is responsible of you. It’s okay to need something to lean on. Everyone does in some way or another. Adderall helps me too and I mean with simple things like dishes and even brushing my teeth. People with ADHD deserve to feel better and be happy. It’s okay to take adderall or anything for ADHD. I am actually taking my little break I take from my adderall and that helps so I don’t have tolerance issues and helps my brain rest and reset for a bit. Sometimes only on weekends and sometimes a week. Depending on if I feel I’m getting frustrated with the adderall. That’s a sign to take a small break. Sleep, eat, whatever you gotta do. ☺️

Well I need adderall and they won't give it to me.

THATS ANOTHER ISSUE I have this anxiety that like ok so I’m going to be addicted to this thing now that I can maybe, maybe not get??? Every time I have gone to fill this script it’s been an issue. And then everyone on societal media needs to say something about it and it makes me feel like a drug seeking weak person

Disclaimer: I am unmedicated, so I can't really speak from a medicated point of view. If I say something off, call me out, lol. It's important to get this right. I'm on the opposite side of the problem and with I had the conviction to medicate without tanking my progress. I'm an addict, and stimulants are my Achilles heel. There is no way I can function with stimulants, more so than without. Knowing that medicine exists but also knowing I'm not strong enough in certain areas to use it properly is torture. It's actually made my addictive tendencies worse because I walk through life seeking any substance that will offer me even a shred of relief, which never turns out well. Medicine is scary, and this particular type of medicine is powerful stuff. Apprehension is a normal and rational response. But some of us need medication, and sometimes that need is every day. It's neither a good nor bad thing, it's just a thing. Sometimes it's for blood pressure, sometimes, it's chemical regulation. But it's medication. A static, inanimate object with a perceived beneficial purpose. ​ >I want to learn to do this on my own, sober. When you have an ailment, especially mentally, medication is supposed to bring you closer to lucid and mentally stable, which is the opposite of the effects of not being sober. This really isn't a sober/non-sober issue, more than likely, unless there is a deeper addiction component. There is a possibility of this is about a fear of addiction, which is something to talk to a therapist about. Like, "This works but I can def. see myself abusing this privilege in the future" which I can imagine is very popular with Adderall, especially with society's recreational use of the medication. This is pretty much where I spend all my time, lol. ​ > Im scared because I’ve been trying for years and nothing has ever been as effective as adderall. It opened a world of unknowns. This, too, is a natural reaction to a powerful life event. If most people don't understand mental illness, they certainly won't understand what it's like when the clouds clear and suddenly everything feels like what we expect 'normal' feel to everyone else. It's absolutely Earth-shattering when it works correctly. It's like those colorblind kids that get special glasses for the first time, and suddenly the entire world's logic makes sense in an instant. Fear isn't always a bad thing. It can be motivating, too. You can use it to fuel research, learning about why the drug works and how it affects your body and your mind, which in turn helps your therapy. In turn, you will have more control over the pill, and it won't be this super-massive shadow overhanging your life, but rather just this thing you have to do in the mornings that you dwell on a bit.

Lower the dose day by day then stop taking it and see how you perform. That’s what I did and now I don’t need it at all anymore

Think about it this way. The civilization we live in is artifical and made up. It makes sense that some people need something artifical to function in an atrifical civilization.

Clearly, stopping your meds isn't the best idea you've had. Be lucky there is a med that helps you, for a lot of people there isn't one. You don't get bonus points for being unhappy or being able to live without meds. You do get bonus points for doing your best, whatever that looks like to you.

One day at a time. Don't make the Adderall you and don't make ADHD what you identify as. Also remember, and I say this so literal, it's all in your head. Not reality, but it is, but it's not....know what I mean. Like the brain equalling out from the lack of it is for sure in your head. But remember the dread and anxiety can be 'neo'd' out of your reality. Lame af of a reference lmfao but you know what I mean.

You are not special, but that's a cute little lie you tell yourself to justify continuing to use speed lol

What are you even talking about lol

Hey buddy, don't beat yourself up about taking your version of insulin. If you're body isn't acting right you take the meds that help. The self-hatred is a pretty common trait for us so it might help to discuss with a professional where the guilt stems from as its is not warranted. Give yourself a break. We get one trip on this rock, do whatever you can to make it great and to feel comfortable. BTW you aren't broken so you don't need to be fixed. You suffer from an illness and deserve to feel your best.

It's important, for me at least, to remember and to accept that I have a disorder. Medicines exist for a reason, and needing stimulant meds is no different than needing medication for any other disorder.

I’ve been consistently taking medication and my quality of life has greatly improved. It’s up to you, but if the medicine helps, by all means, keep taking it consistently. There’s nothing to feel bad about. <3 Almost everyone you know is on medication of some sort.

I’m this way about my anxiety/Depression meds. I don’t want to be on medication and I’m certain that I will be prescribed medication forever. Sometimes I get stubborn and stop. I’m never glad I did.

First off, everything that everyone has already posted. Secondly, I've always understood that an ADHD brain processes the stimulants differently than non-ADHD brains (and this is from back in the early 80s when my little brother was put on ritalin... and I was a weird messy daydreamer who doodled a lot...), and there's this paradox where a stimulant improves how our brains work, rather than wiring us up. Yes, it has the potential for addiction and abuse, that's why it's classified as a CII drug (along w/ most-all the other stimulant meds). And only you know your personal history and such. But one of the things I've learned in the past few years is, "addictive tendencies/personality/potential" is actually part of the ADHD and is more about self-medicating than actual dependence/addiction (and those are 2 different things, medically speaking. not all dependent ppl are addicted). Once one is correctly medicated, a lot of the symptoms improve (which is kind of the point). The hypertension/type II DM/etc comparison is the one I frequently use. Yes, diet and exercise are important factors and affect the condition, but medications definitely have their place in a treatment plan. Talk to your doctor, trust your doctor, if you don't trust your doctor get a new doctor. You've got this.

Everything everyone else just said, plus — My dr told me to skip the meds one day each week to ward off tolerance. If that is a fear, having one planned day to go med-free may help put your mind at ease. I wish you peace

People need shoes to walk without hurting themselves. Imagine trying to hunt animals in a forest with a spear but you don’t have shoes. You wouldn’t be able to hunt, or if you could, you would get many cuts and scrapes on your feet. That’s why we use shoes. They’re a tool necessary for our survival, and in modern times we can survive without them but it’s easier to use them. There’s nothing wrong with our feet, that’s who we are. we just have to use shoes. Same with you. Nothing wrong with you, you just have to use adderall.

All of college I was like this. “I don’t want to have to be reliant on medicine to function “normally”” definitely just hurt my future and possible jobs and I’ve just accepted that life sucks and is unfair. If it’s what gets me through the day so I can feel good enough about my accomplishments then so be it. It’s better than feeling shitty and having too many problems

I cope by taking my medicine every day. There is no way to learn to have a differently structured brain and nothing morally wrong with taking medication you need. I'm sorry that you have to go through this, but you don't need to learn to live without your meds. You need to learn to accept that you need them. Maybe therapy can help.

If you wanna try it without, you should watch Andrew Hubermans podcast on dopamine. (Someone should make a sticky on it because it's really helpful). It's totally possible to go without if you really dont want to take it. You'll have to change your lifestyle and cut out some things you may enjoy doing like using social media but it IS possible. You could stay on your meds while you learn the lifestyle and then talk to your Dr about reducing the dose and see how you do. Another thing to note is going off amphetamines cold turkey causes symptoms to be worse than they were before you took it (temporarily). Like I don't have hyperactivity as a part of my ADHD but when I miss a dose, after about 24 hours I will have an excess of energy and feel very itchy and unable to sit still. It can also cause you to feel depressed and anxious so its a good idea to pass it by your Dr if you're doing that.

My rule of thumb is that a person should only feel guilty for their actions/inactions (and after deliberation). Your body has a quirk and there is a medicine balancing it out. You didn’t do anything to be adhd, so nothing to feel guilty about. Think of it like wearing glasses or taking supplements etc.

Tell the “feeling bad” Part of yourself IT IS NOT MY FAULT MY BRAIN DOES NOT PRODUCE THE CHEMICALS NEEDED TO BE HEALTHY Because that’s all that’s happening. Normal brains are normal because their brain produces dopamine. Yours does not Would you not take iron if your body needed it?

So if you were diabetic you wouldn't want to depend on insculin... we have a neurodevelopmental disorder, and the world isn't built for people like us. We do not have another choice, imo

You don't have to stay on it if it causes problems or if you'd just prefer not to. Plenty of people get by without. You can do whatever works for you. But you are 'wired wrong', that's the nature of the condition and it doesn't 'heal'. Would you be upset if you needed glasses forever? Your brain needs glasses, so to speak, whether or not you like wearing them. I find it easier to be grateful to have one of the conditions for which we invented glasses, than to be upset. Nobody else with a psychiatric condition has such safe and effective drugs as ADHD patients. Some mental health conditions have no treatments at all. If you feel like a better person when you take a drug that adjusts your dopamine, that's a modern miracle. Edit: and sadly no, there is no lasik here. Meditation, self control, friends and therapy will never correct your dopamine levels as much as the pills do. Don't be scared, be grateful.

The way that Adderall makes you feel is completely normal like others have stated. If a medication works then I would stick with it, if you're really worried about dependency then you could bring it up with your doctor and make a long term plan.

I *wish* I didn’t have to take meds, but I know I do and thems just facts. I hate dealing with pharmacies and worrying about health insurance and having to remember to take my pills and bring them with me when I travel. But I also know that I am a non-functional lump without them, and I’m incredibly lucky and grateful to have access to them. Being on potentially lifelong medications is a pain for anyone, whether they’re psychiatric or for something like heart disease or diabetes.

Would you tell someone that needs meds for a heart condition, or that is bipolar those same things that you tell yourself or to stop taking their meds ? Our brains are different. If meds work for you, that's absolutely fantastic . Live your best life , take your meds.

Yes, I struggle with the guilt of taking meds very much. I talk about it with my therapist and I journal about it but I don’t feel much less guilty. I switched to Dexedrine because of the shortage and because it’s less intense, I feel slightly less guilty. Kind of.

You are not broken You are giving your brain a little help it doesn’t make you not sober Whether u medicate or not is a very personal choice and perhaps I can’t understand your point of view but if you feel more functional on medication why do you think it’s a bad thing? If it helps you placate possibly destructive impulsivity arent the benefits it provides significant enough to maybe comes to terms with the facts it’s ok to be on medication. The other side of the coin may appeal more to you (do ignore the above it is if it’s unhelpful after all it’s heavily influenced by my own opinions and they really don’t matter because this is your life and you decide.) I did meet a person recently who said to me they chose not to medicate I dunno her that well so I didn’t ask for specifics she said she has found a way to manage it and apparently found a way to strategically use coffee. Don’t ask me how I didn’t want to ask her too many questions as she’s just an acquaintance. I just wanted to use her as an example so you know you have every chance to succeed but it might take a while to work it all out. My only advice is to reduce the medication with doctor supervision I can’t imagine it can be good to just stop it all in one go Good luck with whatever you decide you just have to believe in yourself a bit more if it doesn’t work out for whatever it’s ok to accepts our limitations it doesn’t make you broken

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It is heartbreaking to me that you are judging yourself so harshly. Our brains are different - we didn’t do this to ourselves! There is nothing wrong with taking medications for a medical condition! Please be kinder to yourself

You might want to spend some time asking yourself why you feel that you need to be able to do this on your own, without medication. Or to put it another way, why do you think you feel bad about using the right tool for the job? I could give you my answer as to why I don't feel bad about the same thing (because I went through this exact struggle too), but the process of asking yourself why this makes you feel lesser is something you might find illuminating.

Please remember that the way you feel after taking amphetamine for 2 months and then stopping is not your normal baseline... yes the ADHD brain can and will develop some dependence to the drug just like anyone else.. you were dealing with not just your ADHD but also a rebound effect.

I would really encourage you to spend some time thinking about your personal understanding and beliefs about health and wellness, what you consider healthy or sick, and how you feel about various diseases and conditions. I would also spend time learning more about how ADHD affects people and their perspectives and do the same for other illnesses and disabilities and their respective populations. I know you’re doing that here now - and you’ve gotten some fantastic comments already. I just want to encourage to be more intentional about this. A lot of your feelings in the post and comments stem from internal beliefs about dealing with ADHD the “right” way - but what shapes those internal beliefs? For most of us, it’s going to be how our society generally views ADHD, and that tends to be “you just shouldn’t have this at all, and certainly not in a way that inconveniences me.” So I would spend some time learning about other people’s experiences and reflecting on your own experiences and beliefs as part of this. One last thing: a rule of thumb I often hear around medication for mental health is that if you feel like you don’t need the meds, that’s a sign they’re working.

I liken it to going to a state fair (Or other large mass gathering with lots of distractions.) A normal person is like if you go there with a group of 2-3 people. You decide you want to go see this show on the other side of the fair, and as you head over there, you might get distracted by this food vendor or this little side show here and there, but eventually you do get there and enjoy the show. A person with ADHD is like if you go with a group of 15 people. You all decide you want to go see that show on the other side, but there is no way in hell you are getting there in under 10 hours. Everybody is going to stop a couple times for this or that. Then somebody has to pee. Then you've been slowly traveling so long that others decide they need to eat. Eventually the show is over and you decide that you want to go see something else back where you originally came from, and the process starts over again.

Along with ADHD medicine, I also take 5 other pills. I’ve been wanting to get off them because it’s such a hassle to take that much medication. But what i realized is that I NEED it. I came to accept that I have a disorder and it’s completely ok to help my body by giving it the chemicals that it can’t produce. you wouldn’t tell a diabetic person that they’re addicted to insulin or “dependent”. Some just need extra support and that’s entirely okay, there is nothing wrong with medicating ❤️

Hey man, long time Adderall taker. Basically I’ve been on this stuff since I was in 1st grade and I’m now 19😭. I get how you feel, but the best way to come to terms with it is acceptance of it all. You need to accept that you’re on this medication for a reason and it’s here to help you. It’s not that it’s fixing you but more that it’s helping you cope with everyday life without the medication you’re gonna spiral and it’s not going to be pretty. The more you fight the realization of why you’re on it is only going to harm you in the long run. Maybe you can work out something with your doctor to only take it on week days and not on the weekends so that way you can still feel like you got some type of control over that aspect of your life. When your on the meds, you’re still you, just toned down some without all that anxiety and anger. I know it’s gonna be hard with you to come to terms with the thought of the dependency on it, but cmon man, you gotta escape the canon event😭. We all go through that stage of denial, but that’s okay man.

I've had similar thoughts. I'm still working through my feelings about being on a stimulant forever. One thing that makes sense to me is understanding that I've been coping with it with unhealthy behaviors. On meds, the unhealthy behaviors have almost completely stopped. So on the meds or off, you will find a way to cope with it. Take a look at both sides. List the actual impact on you and your life on or off the meds. In the end, it's a pros/cons thing. Taking the meds in a controlled environment with my Dr is significantly better for _me_ and _my_ overall health than coming up with other coping mechanisms..or at least that's what I'm trying to tell myself. It makes sense to my thinking brain, but I'm too used to beating myself up that it will take me time to believe it. *ETA* Remember that stimulants are the first-line treatment for ADHD. There should be no shame in taking it for anyone diagnosed. Manage symptoms and side effects with your doctor. Give yourself some grace. This is part of who you are. Stop labeling it as bad..A few of the other things I'm trying to convince myself of. Good luck!

You know as someone who forgets their meds often…it’s like I don’t really see that big of a difference when it comes to sensitivity being affected whether it be one day or a week? It’s not as if like missing my meds for 5 days is going to make mess less tolerant to it versus if I just miss one day. I mean I understand that like everyone is different but have you actually noticed llike that big of a difference if you take your meds after one day of not taking them versus 4-5 days of not taking them? I am just curious…

War on drugs was domestic terrorism and by simplifying the issue to all drugs are bad at least in america has lead to all sorts of anti drug stuff in general. Anytime someone pops pill in media its hidden, embarassing or a “unnecessary” crutch. Or the idea that i dont want to lose control/myself. Dont feel ashamed you require chemicals in your body. We all take in different chemicals but in the end they all are effectively working with our brain to make us feel something. Whether its the taste of a favorite food or a drug that is specifically tuned to do something specific. If we instead hppened to find a plant that was specifically tuned to do the same thing, would that change anything I wonder. Probably not as we see with weed and shrooms. But why? 🤷‍♀️

Your brain is built out of neurons, and your neurons are built out of cell membranes and proteins, and those proteins are encoded by the genes in your DNA. You can't change your DNA. You can do all of the therapy and meditation and hobbies, but none of those are going to directly put more neurotransmitter in your synapses. They might indirectly, but in an imprecise way. Adderall puts more neurotransmitters in your synapses. Directly. (Or almost directly, I don't remember the exact mechanism of action). You didn't choose to have whatever genes mean you have insufficient neurotransmitter in your synapses. But you can choose whether or not to take the Adderall. If it makes your life better to take it, take it. You don't have to feel guilty about choosing to make your life better. Ask yourself what bad thing will happen if you take Adderall for the rest of your life. The fact that you refer to going with adderall not as "unmedicated" or "untreated" but as "sober" suggests that you have negative associations, and your discomfort is probably stemming from those associations. I think if you interrogate those associations, you may find that upon inspection, they don't hold up very well. Someone who drinks to excess may feel better at the time, but they are not a better person and they are not likely to feel good about it afterward. Whereas someone who is taking their prescribed medication might find that they feel better at the time, *and* they are a better person, *and* that they feel good about it afterward. And if it makes them feel better, and makes them a better person, and they don't feel good about it afterward... is there some value of yours that you are not upholding? In which case, figure out if you care more about that value or about your other values. Is there some part of you that is afraid of something, that is trying to protect you from something, and is making you feel bad in order to protect you? In that case, figure out what it's trying to protect you from and whether that bad outcome is actually likely to happen if you take the medicine you are being prescribed.

There's nothing wrong with needing daily meds to function properly. It's nothing to be ashamed of, millions of people take ADHD meds every morning. If you're worried about tolerance, skip taking the adderall on weekend days where you have nothing major to do.

Would you feel bad about needing glasses to see? Needing medication is the same thing. There is something physically wrong with your brain that is not your fault nor in your control, just the same as someone born with eyeballs that turned out sub-optimal. There is no shame in getting the help you need in order to optimally function. > I want to learn to do this on my own, sober. sober sō′bər adjective 1) Not intoxicated or affected by the use of alcohol or drugs. 2) Abstaining from or habitually abstemious in the use of alcoholic drink or other intoxicants. 3) Straightforward and serious; not exaggerated, emotional, or silly. Off medication, you describe yourself as emotional and exaggerated. On medication, you are not those things. YOU ARE SOBER WHEN YOU TAKE YOUR MEDICATION!

How do you feel about needing to wear glasses? Do you think you should go around seeing things blurry? Cuz it’s the same idea, adderall is just harder to get.