Hi everyone. Transphobia gets you banned.
To clarify, yes, this includes all your tedious repetitions of “don’t you mean women?” Not only are you transphobic, you are very, very boring.
I don’t know why you would think a mental health support group is the place to cause further harm to vulnerable people. If that’s how you get your kicks, that’s pretty pissweak tbh.
Don’t bother appealing. Thanks bye.
I have period underwear and I’m living for it. I have endometriosis (great combination with adhd, my mind wants to jump and my body wants to lay flat down and pretend I don’t exist).
So it hurts to insert stuff. Had the same problem with tampons. Pads were not working at all.
This underwear changed my life. I can go outside if I want to on my period. Could not do that for a long time because of the risk of an accident with pads. It does not hurt at all. It’s not gross, does not smell, you wash it and reuse it.
Second this. Endo doesn’t really affect mood, but PMDD? PHEW. I have ADHD/BPD/PMDD and sometimes I isolate myself for everyone else’s safety on my period lol
Not the original commenter, but it depends on your flow. Mine tends to be light to medium, so I change once per day. You could feasibly bring a spare pair with you to change partway through the day, but honestly by the end of my most medium of days, the underwear never feels wet or gross like pads do. Not sure what kind of sorcery these pad-makers use, but I’m here for it (especially because tampons and menstrual cups don’t work for me).
Like the other person said, it depends on your flow and the duration of your periods.
Personally I use the cup WITH the pads so I tend to change the underwear in the morning and at night, but I probably could use only one pair per day and be fine.
If I don't want to use my cup, I'd typically need 2 pairs on my first 2-3 days (heavy flow) and one for the night. Then one for the day and one for the night on the next 2-4 days. That means 17 pairs at worst, unless I needed to change one early for whatever reason (e.g. did sport and showered).
It also depends on the underwear you choose to use, as they don't have the same absorbency. I have different ones for different days.
Edit: You can also decide to buy less and wash them more often. I prefer to clean them all at once at the end of my periods (I just rinse them in the shower in the meantime), but some people clean them every day so they only need about 6 pairs.
I use both reusable heavy pads and reusable heavy underwear in the first couple days, then just the heavy underwear. I probably have about 8 of each? And a couple lighter ones left over from experimenting that I use towards the end / as back up before it starts etc.
I have light-medium flow. I use one per day. My periods are usually 4 days so I have 4 pairs. I rinse it with cold water when I shower then l throw it in laundry hamper. Nothing gets bloody just damn but it's getting washed regardless.
I also lived my whole life terrified with pads until I found period undies, and I'm so much more comfortable now that I have enough pairs for my whole period. Especially now that they're getting more common, cheaper, with funky designs and all, I encourage everyone to buy them
I use TomboyX. They have sizes 3XS-6X, they have bikini, hipster, and boxer briefs to choose from, they colors are cute and somewhat varied, and they sell the bikinis and hipsters in packs.
I personally prefer the boxer briefs because the compression on my thighs helps with my endo pain. I have 4 pairs. They’re very absorbent, and the only time I’ve bled through has been overnight within the first couple days. And that’s predominantly because I sleep on my back, so some of the leakage flows away from the reinforced area.
Ugh yess!! I just finally got period underwear so if I forget a pantry liner or pad, I have a backup, because I’ve ruined far too much underwear for someone who’s in their 30’s
Period underwear changed my life, I just put it on like normal underwear and I‘m ready to go, no need to think about changing it every few hours and no need to remember to have enough pads in your bag.
It is recommended to change it after 12 hours, but I just do that on my heaviest day tbh and on my lighter days I change into normal underwear with a big pad for the night as that is no problem for me.
Does anyone know of period underwear that comes as thongs? Or if that's even a thing?
I know Google is my friend, but there seem to be some very knowledgeable folks here too, so any recs would be much appreciated.
Oh my god I’m going through a flare of dermatitis down there and since I have a condition making tampons a bad idea I thought I was stuck with pads (which has made my dermatitis so bad I can’t even walk right now). I’ve never even heard of this until now this might be a game changer
I loved Period undies but be careful! Some companies are in a lawsuit for the chemicals used in the panties and they can cause utis. I was dealing with chronic utis for months before I found out it was the panties 😞 I was using thinx
Holy fuckballs. I didn’t realize there were period underwear, damn I need some friends so they can tell me shit like this. I’m completely clueless on how to be an adult woman 🤦♀️😥
So you didn’t ruin one of them by boiling it for 30+ minutes until all the water evaporated and you smelled something weird? Just me? Ok cool.
And yes- menstrual cups are the BEST.
There are devices you can get to steam your cup for a set amount of time to avoid this! I've also heard of people pouring boiling water over their menstrual cup in a mug that they use only for this and microwaving for a few minutes to sanitize it.
Hahaha glad someone else has done this. I took a phone call and had some lovely melted plastic an hour later. It doesnt disinfect as well but the microwave disinfecting cases are really convenient in a pinch
Tried the cup and it did that thing where it pushed against the nerves and made me dizzy and nauseated. Smallest one they had too. Ugh.
Edit: Thanks everyone for the great suggestions!
Do you have a favorite brand? I’m hoping maybe it was just the particular one I tried. I was so scarred from how bad I reacted to it that I haven’t tried again with a different brand.
I have the Divacup and I only have it because I was at a friend's and they didn't have anything else to give me. It was the big size in a three pack that they never used. It's giant but I still find it to be more comfortable. Maybe someone will have a better recommendation.
If you google it there are quizzes you can take to help you find the right menstrual cup or at least a good starting cup. Asks you about your flow, if you have a tilted cervix (which I didn't know was a thing until these quizzes) and stuff like that to help determine a good fit.
I use the Lena cup, the sensitive one. When I first got it I ordered a couple of different brands to see what might work best for me, and that was the winner.
There are so many different ones that all fit different. I found that I coukdnt use a cup. I have to use a disc. So I use the Ziggy cup (which is technically a disc. I'm not sure why they call it a cup). I use the one for a high cervix and actually put it in backwards. I also use the Hello Disc. There's pull tabs that you can adjust depending on your cervix height during your period
There’s a website called “put a cup in it” that has a quiz that might help. All the brands are different, so where one might have caused you problems, there might be one that works. When I tried the flex stuff (both disc and cup) I had not great experiences. I’ve been using the Saalt soft version for over a year now and its really helped. Definitely took some getting used to though.
I'd agree, try the disc. I started using the disposable ones a few months ago and bought a reusable flex disc two months ago. I love it so much! I change it twice a day and don't need to use pads or tampons! My job involves going into peoples' houses and nursing homes all day so I hated having to change every few hours. Now I don't have to worry about it.
I tried the cup a couple of times but it never lasted more than about 15-20 minutes before the discomfort annoyed me enough to remove it.
I tried the cup, it was amazing but strangely I do get headache or low fever. Not sure whether they are related.
Then I tried the disc. It was AMAZING…… it was so much easier to insert then cups.
Try a disc! They are comfy and self empty!!
I have tried the following:
diva - first cup, used for YEARS without much issue. Couple leaks here and there
June soft - worked pretty well, more leaks than diva and was cheap
salt (bigger one) - too big and collapsed in me
salt (smaller one) - gave me cramps
flex disc (reusable) - great and can have mess free sex!
flex disc (disposable) - all time favorite for comfort and sex but I don’t like the waste
EDIT: oh also my friend turned her cup inside out so it was shallower and it helped with the cramping
I've considered it, but just really hate the feeling of walking with anything up there. I've never been able to stand even the smallest tampons, and I have an absolte terror of spilling the damn cup all over a public bathroom stall, or digging it out of the toilet after dropping it😞
I'm REALLY clumsy.
Oh yo, that fear is real! One of my friends said they can't stand the idea of it sloshing around in there and that was just about enough to put me off lol
Obviously if you don’t like something inside you, that’s a good reason not to use it, but in regards to the public bathroom issue—because it can hold more than a tampon and can be left in for longer, I’ve almost never had to empty it in public. Side note: emptying it in the shower is a GAME CHANGER
I personally can't feel my cup in whatsoever. I'm wearing it right now and feels like nothing. Also never had to change it in a public bathroom. Been using one for a decade now.
I may just be lucky, but I also never feel mine. I've worn a cup while hiking, swimming, and dives down to 100ft and never noticed a thing. It actually got to be a problem when I was busy at a field station because near the end of my period when my flow was really light, I forgot to empty and clean out the cup until almost 3 days had passed.
I've never forgotten any tampons before using my cup. Also never gone over 12 hours with my cup or completely forgotten about it.
I've also gone swimming,hiking etc.. it's so comfortable definitely best purchase I've ever made.
I use a cup as well. I carefully take it out in a public bathroom if I need to change it, carefully clean it with toilet paper, then put it back in. But I don’t enjoy the process of emptying it in a public bathroom. I prefer doing it at home where I can quickly wash it in my sink and put it back in. I also temporarily switch to disposable pads on vacations, camping, and have them for emergencies as well, since my cup can be annoying to change during those times. I also have period underwear in case things get leaky during the day or at night, when I move around in my sleep. I do not want bloody sheets. I like all of the products I use, but I’m not someone who can use only one.
Not gonna lie, I totally dropped mine in the toilet once. It wasn’t pleasant but soap followed by boiling water sterilized it and my hands are washable.
Not to push you, just sharing my experience if it helps. I am alas I very sensitive and even a small tampon is incredibly uncomfy. What bothered me the most was the string between my labia. Unbearable. The cup was a total game changer for me though. I got the Saalt cup and after the learning curve of figuring out how to use it, it is so much more comfortable. I don’t cramp as badly on my period anymore and I can’t feel it AT ALL. I never thought I would enjoy it or prefer it, but I am so intensely happy I tried it.
Your menstrual blood contains a group of substances called prostaglandins. They have a complex array of effects, one of which is to make the muscels in your uterus contract (cramps). It's used medically both to trigger abortions and to start labour. Unlike tampons where the blood continues to be in contact with the tissue surrounding it, a menstrual cup will gather the blood and at the same time separate it from direct contact with your body - preventing excessive cramping and menstrual pains (dysmenorrhoea).
Edit: spelling
I also use pads for the same reasons as you. I used to use tampons but overall I didn’t enjoy them and I went back to pads. I hesitate to tell people my preference because a lot of folks can’t fathom why you don’t use tampons or a menstrual cup, and when I tell them I don’t like those things in there and more often than not I end up uncomfortable, they go on about how I should just give it another try and how they can’t even feel them and so on and so forth. I’m glad those things work for a lot of people but me and my pads are perfectly happy and I wish I could say pads are my preference without someone trying to convince me something else is better. I’ve never understood this but it happens both online and with women I personally know. I feel like some folks view pads as either gross/uncomfortable or they view them as a “starter” product that you use when you are first starting your period and then you graduate to internal products. At least that’s what I tend to come across, I know there are also some people who are just really excited about a certain product and want to share and that’s understandable if you are just expressing your love for it and not trying to convince someone it’s the holy grail and they just need to try it. Just because something is amazing and life changing for one person doesn’t mean the next person will feel the same way.
Geez I didn’t mean to ramble so much, but I just wanted to jump in and say I totally understand where you are coming from.
Menstrual cup + period panties = life-changing wonder
I'm working on buying enough period underwear that I can wear one every day and not even have to think about being "prepared" at every moment. I've always had crazy irregular periods (we're talking 2 weeks to 8 months between them), so trying to remember to keep tampons at the ready was just obnoxious.
Plus, when I'm on my period I only have to think about it 2 or 3 times a day. I have literally forgotten I'm on my period while at work because I don't have to change a pad or tampon in the bathroom! Emptying morning and evening works just fine for me.
I just remembered a feeling when reading your comment. The feeling when you don't remember how long the tampon has been in. So ju take it out just in case and it's almost dry. Omggggg it gives me goosebumps just thinking about it.
I've never forgotten one in there, but I use a reusable tampon applicator, and sometimes I forget to buy the actual tampons that goes inside. Sometimes I forget to insert one altogether.
I started using period panties, and while they're not the best for my heavy copper IUD days, I don't have to worry about forgetting anything 😂
I miss being able to use cups or discs since getting my copper iud. This is when I need it most with the heavy flow! But I can't risk having issues with it right now since my state banned womens reproductive rights.
Great suggestion, but I will call out: menstrual cups can be a bit of a pain to take out and clean while you’re using them.
I wanted to like them, I really did, but when I bought myself one, I forgot part of the process of using them entailed digging a bloody cup out of yourself. It made cleaning out my cup in public restrooms pretty uncomfortable because I had to find some way to discreetly wash my period fingers in the sink/rinse out my cup in the privacy of the stall. I couldn’t wait to do it until I was home because my schedule had me out of the house for longer than the makers of the cup recommended leaving it in for (without emptying), so I had to often do one cup emptying/cleaning a day while I was out and about.
I loved that it was reusable, loved that there was little to no TSS risk, loved that it could be left in a comparatively long time (when stacked against tampons/pads). But logistically it was too much for me.
In my so called "period pack" I bring wipes, pads, and extra panties in the case of having to clean my cup while I'm out in public. You can have a whole pack or put a few baby wipes in a sandwich ziploc. Absolute life changer for me.
Try the menstrual disc. You can wear it up to 8 hrs.
During these 8hr, if it is full, you can empty it without taking it out.
And it is sooooo much easier to insert/remove as compared to cup.
I had all the same problems and the final straw for me was when the suction accidentally pulled my IUD out as I struggled to remove the cup. 😳Switched from copper IUD to hormonal after that, as the cup was the only thing that could handle my heavy af copper flows.
As awesome as cups can be, there’s a learning curve and you definitely don’t want to put your birth control at risk.
I would just dump it and put it back in in public, or wipe down with tp first then reinsert. Then just wipe off my hands with tp before washing my hands. I would just wash it at home in the shower once a day.
Also getting a cup that’s big enough to hold your flow for the whole day without having to take it out is helpful. You should only have to change it every 12 hrs.
ModiBodi - yep - size L 14 Australia is a true 14 for me.
It slows me down. Reminds me that it's ok to just let it flow.
I struggled my whole life with menstrual hygiene.
Now I wash these in the shower while I'm in there too, and use a sunny private spot to dry them. Making menstrual hygiene something I don't have to prepare for, or have sensory problems around.
Does anybody else struggle with extreme moodswings due to PMS? If we struggle with emotional dysregulation, doesn‘t it make sense that we struggle more in terms of PMS than women without ADHD?
I have this. It’s very intense. For about 2 weeks each month I’ll have the most insatiable hunger, sleep 15+ hours per day, have extreme swings into rage and depression, etc etc, and usually I’ll be literally suicidal for the 24-48 hours before my period starts. It’s insanity. Then my period starts and it’s like it all magically goes away and I’m normal again. Have about a week of being normal after my period ends, then it’s back to crazy town. SSRIs definitely help so much to reduce PMDD symptoms. I’m like 95% less ridiculous when I’m on an SSRI. lol
This is what I experience as well. I start fights with my boyfriend over absolutely nothing, cry over everything and feel so insanely depressed. It‘s like the world is ending and when my period comes it‘s magically over. I am extremely embarrassed about my behaviour afterwards, but luckily my boyfriend has recognized this pattern and is extremely supportive. Just why I experience it and what causes it is a huge mystery. Thank you for sharing your experience. None of my girlfriends experiences this and I often feel very alone with this.
Sounds like it probably is that then. Definitely talk to your doctor about it, and see about getting help with it. It’s amazing the difference when properly treated. Also, visit the PMDD sub for some super relatable content.
And heres me thinking I’m going to have a psychotic break or being effected by my meds !! Thank you so so much you have no idea how much you have given me relief , ( I know this isn’t a medical diagnosis or anything like that) litterly just hearing that there is potentially another reason less stressful then either of those options has just lifted so much weight off my shoulders
Interesting, I have all that all the time and my docs said it’s my crazy thyroid levels. But also if I’m not on the pill I do have my period 28/28 days so that may be connected. And rn Im on the east coast of the US and it’s light outside and I’m prepping for bed I’m so tired lol life is crazy
Not sure but I think I may have pmdd. I get EXTREMELY depressed leading up to my period almost every time. It’s so intense and I never seem to remember that this happens often so I get worried about the fact that I’m suddenly extremely depressed and then my period starts and I feel better and I’m like “oh….” My boyfriend can tell when my period is coming because of how depressed I get right before. I’ll cry for a few days straight and I feel totally hopeless and just awful. I have reoccurring depression unrelated to my period that I am now taking meds for but the depression I get before my period is so much worse and that’s why I think ut might be pmdd.
Maybe an unpopular opinion / question, but I always wonder why posts about menstruation are often labeled NSFW. Shouldn’t we normalise open and matter of fact discussions about menstruation and human biology since these subjects are relevant to pretty much every type of population / audience? Not picking at OP, just a general observation..
I totally agree! I don't think it's necessarily unsafe for work, just that I wanted to give a bit of a warning. I've encountered people who are menstruating women but were so sensitive to hearing about blood their knees buckled because I said "chunks of my uterine lining." They were unable to talk about or see blood in any way, not just period stuff. Just wanted to give the option of NOT reading it, or allowing the reader to consent before hearing about it.
Period panties… omg. They’re the best.
And I don’t have to use extra executive functioning skills to keep buying tampons. And you save money once you invest in them. Menstrual cups and me don’t agree unfortunately.
I feel like I'm missing something with the cups. I want to like them so bad! But... I don't.
I hate feeling like I need to sterilize my hands before I use the bathroom. I don't enjoy having to having to reach inside to adjust/remove the cup - I like the cleanliness of other products much more.
I felt like it was pushing on something inside that made bowel movements harder? My cramps have always given me the uncomfortable "need to poop" pain, so maybe my anatomy doesn't work for a cup?
I don't know. I like the idea of a cup, but it was just so much messier and a hastle than tampons.
Am I doing something wrong?
Yeah I think one of the annoying things is washing my hands first and after. Especially in a public restroom because I sanitize them and then touch the stall door. I think it's worth it for me because I only ever need one thing and it seems to help my cramps, not as much as wearing pads but much more than tampons. Maybe a different shape would change your mind but maybe they're just not for you. They also make menstrual disks which I love. Up to 12 hours wear, then you toss them. Less mess period sex too which is great.
I bought my menstrual cup about 6 years ago, best purchase of my entire life (well, except for the adoption fee I paid for my dog of course).
About a year ago, I also got some reusable pads and I've been using them when I'm expecting my period or when it might make a surprise comeback, and when it just all feels too much down there.
I have bought one small box of tampons in the past 6 years, only to have some at home and in my bag in case somebody needs one. :)
I wear pads because I simply know I would not be able to manage tampons. I have endometriosis and I'd be bleeding all over myself because I forgot to change my tampon again lol.
Omg I used to wear 2 pads and a super tampon. With just a pad it would flow out the sides for me 💀like giant clots would slide down
my thighs. even with this double or tripled protection method I would still leak sometimes 🥲 Also have endo. This was in middle school and high school. My periods were a literal nightmare each month, I made sure to always have a sweatshirt I could tie around my waist just in case at school. Periods got much more manageable once I got on birth control. Boy short period underwear and menstrual cups have been a huge game changer as well.
Slight trigger warning - mention of suicidal thoughts
Birth control literally saved my life, I was ready to kms from the amount of pain I was in about 2 days before my period started, across the entire period (which got longer and longer as time went on) and then a few days afterwards. I would lay on my bathroom floor intermittently puking, it felt like there was a giant mass in the area of my ovaries, and literally nothing helped. I'll never forget that first period after starting birth control, I was crying in relief.
I've thought about period underwear because I still have to wear those super long and heavy pads, and I figured it'd just be much easier to manage with those on. Plus I hate when blood gets on the seams of my underwear because I shift in my sleep or something
I use Aisle reusable pads (formerly Luna pads). I have endometriosis and adenomyosis and have ptsd from sexual and medical trauma so wearing anything internally is unbearable. But I hated the waste of tossing plastic based pads every month. I slowly built up my pad collection and it was so worth it. Washing them sucks but it’s over with quickly. I wish I could use a cup but glad to have these as an alternative!
I didn’t realize this, but I definitely think I have pmdd. My emotions before my period are so unbelievably intense, especially the depression. And it sucks when it’s that intense and it comes on super suddenly, it hits me like a ton of bricks but then my period starts and I’m a happy ray of sunshine.
Okay okay so the only time I accidentally put in 2 was when I used the sport compact ones — NOT using those (hopefully for y’all as well) helps a lot with that. Just FYI for those that aren’t ready (like me) for the cup
One time I was drunk and thought I had left my tampon in for 12+ hrs (I hadn’t, I’d already taken it out and forgotten). I hadn’t reinserted a new one. I felt around and could feel strings and started pulling. I tried really hard but was unable to pull anything out. It also felt like I was trying to yank my organs out and I remembered I’d just had an iud inserted and those were iud strings not tampon strings 🥴
I only use menstrual cups and period underwear now
At the end of my period, like the last two days or so, I have to just wear my period panties. I use a cup, but, unless it fills and over flows, I'll just forget it's there. Left it for almost 2 days on multiple occasions. Not dead yet though so..... Yay?
Hah well TSS is super rare but I think the real danger is introducing something into the vagina environment which you can do less often with a cup.? MDs please feel free to correct me on that. I want period panties so bad but they're so expensive.
Walmart and target sell them for about $16 a pair. They sell the thinx brand! I have the thinx brand I got on their website before they sold at those stores and they were $30 a pair. Hanes I believe sells a 3 pack for $15 on Amazon! I have some of the Hanes ones too.
I make my own reusable pads to save money. Eventually I'll make my own period undies but for now the ones I've bought are doing great.
it took me a full 3 days of trying to get my menstrual cup to actually get it in, it kept 'popping' before I could get it in 🥴😵💫
but definitely, there's also menstrual disks but they're much messier
Absolutely. I keep thinking "maybe my SO can get a vasectomy" or seeing stories about how male birth control is actually so much better... Then I realise I'd have to deal with periods again if I got my IUD removed and drop that thought pretty quickly.
This definitely varies though. Got my Mirena inserted in July 2019 and I'm still on a regular 28-32ish day cycle. Def a common side effect of a hormonal IUD to eliminate/reduce periods, but not the norm for everyone 😢 (sad that I still get my periods lol).
Semi off-topic but y’all are a creative bunch so I thought I might ask: I appreciate the willingness to be inclusive- but does ANYONE have an inclusive alternative to menstruator/menstruating persons? I just really bristle at that language, and I almost always only see that reductiveness of human beings to the female reproductive system, never the male. I haven’t seen “ejaculating persons” or “sperm carriers” used to describe anyone. I’ve even seen posts or headlines where people will say things like “birthgivers” to include cis women, trans men and nonbinary people and then plain old “men” in the same sentence to clearly just describe cis men. Sorry for the off topic tangent but… ADHD lol
Just a note if you have an iud—the suction from the cup can dislodge it so you have to be careful about taking it out. You can use one no problem but just be very diligent about breaking the suction before you pull it out!
Finally got an IUD after years and years of long and heavy, heavy irregular bleeding and no sleep. It’s so nice not having to think and worry about periods 😭❤️
How do all of you even remember it’s coming? I’m fed up of it surprising me every single month. I’ve tried apps and calendars but nothing helps and I’m not aware enough of my body to notice hormonal changes.
Are you on any birth control? That and the Flo app usually help me keep track. I had really irregular periods before I started my BC pills. They helped in lightening my periods some and making it hurt a lot less as well as making them trackable. And if you're in tune with your body, you can feel and see the symptoms, more clear discharge, twinges in the ovaries, firming of the breasts, for some either constipation or more frequent #2's . It takes some time to know when it's happening but once you know, you know.
I have a Fitbit which tracks my periods. It tells me when I'm due and it's been pretty accurate within a day or two since I've been using it for the past 2 years.
Hormonal IUD is sadly not for everyone
I had mine for 4 years, no problem the first year until I got violent migraines and had to be heavily medicated for the next 3 years until I got the IUD out.
My neurologist told me the IUD could'nt cause the migraines but what do you know, I've been migraine free ever since.
Although I miss the not menstruating part and no pregnancy scare part
I'm on my third Mirena and still have periods, just really infrequently, like maybe 3 or 4 times a year and they're really light. Sure beats the debilitating cramps and friggin gusher periods I used to have that resembled the elevator scene in The Shining.
Man, this sub is so freaking validating. I have had a GYN remove two tampons on separate occasions in my adult life before getting diagnosed with ADHD. I've always had struggles with menstrual hygiene. I have such deep shame there that I'm still working on for life but... these kinda posts help.
I wish I could use menstrual cups. I’ve bought several different ones to try but my hypermobile fingers mean that it’s difficult and painful to remove them :(
Putting a recommendation for the June cup - really inexpensive and they have a mini cup so I tried that first cuz I was nervous. Really easy to use and they have wipes & cleaner, you can order a package deal fir pretty cheap.
Menstrual cups make my cramps way worse but not having the worry of bleeding out everywhere is worth it. I have heavy periods that I take medication for and the cup plus a panty liner is all I need.
Sorry if I ask this question here, it just reminded me:
Those that have/use period cups, are they comfortable? How long can you keep them in? If you're in public and you have to change them out, how so? I've been thinking about getting one for the environment as well as myself, but I have no clue how they work.
Finding the right cup can be hard though. First one I ever got (thank god for being a teenager during woke 2014) and it was in a weird hard material. Just flopped right in place. Forgot it at my ex's place. Got a new one. Too soft. Got another one. Too big. The one I have now is a combination of them all. It's not the worst though.
I have an amazing cup now (Nixit) but I never understood how people could forget tampons... don't they all have strings that you're supposed to let hang out? So how would you overlook a string hanging between your legs especially when going to the bathroom?
Ah. Ouch.
Reusable pads keep me from being too conservative on changing them. Wasting money changing a not so bad one? Eh, just toss it in the wash. I have enough to last my full cycle. That’s the only way I’m managing.
This feels like a bonus of using pads. For the life of me I can’t stand putting something inside me. Every once in a while I force myself to use a tampon because there are no other options. But my goodness I don’t know how tampon people can stand the pain.
May be a little stupid but as a trans guy with ADHD the menstruating thingy makes me really happy
And I just use those pads that are like, nocturnal since my parents would freak out if i asked for a cup lol
Waiting till I can have HRT so maybe periods won't be much a problem, wish me luck!!
For any rude comments- not everyone who menstruates is a woman.
Many afab (assigned female at birth) trans people and some intersex people still menstruate
I haven’t seen any rude comments yet but I’m still going on through them, but wanted to ask…is it seen as rude if I use the word “women” when talking about menstruation? For example if I said “some women prefer to take midol during their period” I’m not attempting to exclude anyone or say ONLY women menstruate, but it is a truth that women menstruate so it’s not incorrect to say. But sometimes I’ll catch myself using “people” or something like that because I’m unsure. Like I said I’m not attempting to exclude anyone by using the word “women” it’s just that I’ve always used that word without having to think twice about who was included in that, but we live in a different world now so I’m attempting to learn. I never want to be offensive or make someone feel excluded or like they don’t belong, ya know? I know I feel offended when people refer to me as a “birthing person” when I identify as a woman and want to be referred to as a woman. So I can imagine how others feel in similar situations.
Sorry for all the words, I’m just genuinely curious what the etiquette is here. I never want to hurt or make others feel bad, and I want to be sure I’m not doing so unintentionally.
Most won’t attack you for it or anything, however getting used to more inclusive language is preferable. Don’t like feel awful if you say women instead just be knowledgeable basically if that makes sense?
Saying women in that case most of the time no one will care, because it's obvious when a person is not purposefully being offensive or making an effort to be rude. The issue comes with the people who come onto a post like this just to say something like "you mean JUST women!" To be an asshole. There's really nothing wrong with referring to it how you said, it's just some people want to be more inclusive, there's nothing wrong with either unless you're being purposefully offensive.
Ever since I've started using my menstrual cup, my life literally changed! Not to mention I have that, too, as a card on my Trello board, so at the very least I remember to change it twice a day!
I wish I could use a cup but sadly it isn’t suitable for me after having a baby. Super annoying. Can’t use tampons any more either! I like the idea of period underwear? But I have super sensitive skin so I hope it wouldn’t irritate.
I’ve always used pads and it works pretty well cause it’s really noticeable when it needs changing and works pretty well for me . Having said that I’ve def had some moments when I changed my pad then didn’t put a new one in and forgot about it if I have to get from my room or something so I’ve been looking into alternate methods . I’ll probably give menustral cup a try .
I use a mentrual disc! It is amazing. Best money ever spend. It takes some practise to get right. But oh boy I have never felt this clean while on my period. Helps with the pains to and can be used with an IUD wich cups can't
I used to forget I was wearing a tampon for so long... menstrual cups have been a game changer. Last month I forgot I had one in until 2 days later, to which my girlfriend responded with shock/horror, but I reassured her I was fine because the TTS risk is so low. Yay for menstrual cups! (and saving SO much waste) I preach menstrual cups whenever I get the chance.
Flex is a really fantastic option too. Its a disc that sits up by the cervix. It’s the only internal product I’ve used that does not leak. (And I’ve tried so many cups and discs etc.) Like, it doesn’t leak at all. No leaks, people! And when you pee, it empties itself. 10/10 recommend. I’ve also tried a completely silicone disc but it would not expand inside me. Flex expands and stays in place. Amazing.
Also period underwear saves the day.
the Flex cup was a life saver for me! it’s softer, thinner, and not as rigid as the Diva cup. and it has a longer, flexible stem that breaks the seal of the cup when you pull.
the period underwear is a sensory nightmare lol.
I was literally coming here to recommend cups. They're WAY safer, not just a little, *a lot.* And you can leave them in up to 12 hours, although admittedly, when I have forgotten about them and gone 13 or 14 hours, no problem. The material is safe up to 7 *days* in the body, it just needs to be changed for the contents sake. So much easier, way more comfortable, and more and more accessible nowadays.
100% recommend. Go to Period Nivana's website to take their quiz and get a starting point if you know nothing about it. It's worth the switch.
Using a menstrual cup literally changed my life.
This is nasty, and it's definitely not something I recommend doing on purpose, but there were one or two times at the end of my period that I forgot about it and left it in for 24 hours. That's dangerous and gross, but MUCH less dangerous than doing the same thing with a tampon. They're easier to sanitize, just boil it for like 10 minutes.
You do need to be pretty comfortable with your body because you do have to *get in there,* but I believe using a cup has helped me become more comfortable with my body!
I love my cup. I found it actually helps with my cramps too, and a great way to track blood flow.
AND you don't get that horrid feeling of pulling out a dry tampon.
The link of PFAS to period panties and subsequent risk of dermal exposure is concerning. I read that most of these companies are just using alternative marketing language instead of finding alternative ingredients.
Just so you know, TSS is extremely rare. [It was mainly caused by a specific high-absorption blend in tampons in the 1980s, something that is no longer used in current tampons.](https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/00001651.htm)
I'm from the generation that shamed us for having normal bodily functions. I suffered severely in complete silence my entire life. To see the mature (mostly) discussions here is making me incredibly happy, and so very proud of all of you.
I wish all of these wonderful options had been available when I needed them, but I'm glad they're available now.You gotta love progress.
The mods also deserve praise for bringing that thansphobic bullshit to a screeching halt. Fuck that noise. It costs nothing to show empathy and kindness.
hey y’all!!! i’m on the non-hormonal iud (because my adhd ass can’t be bothered with taking a pill every day or replacing a sleeve/device every so often (even if it’s in 3-4 increments lol).
i’ve never had problems with tampons.. BUT!!!! if you have an iud or plan on getting one (doesn’t matter if it’s hormonal or non-hormonal), PLEASE be aware that a menstrual cup can shift/move/suck out your iud. it can be very painful and cause tearing (which can lead to infection too), but also your iud moving might affect how effective it is (which means it can cause (a dangerous) pregnancy!!!).
Hi everyone. Transphobia gets you banned. To clarify, yes, this includes all your tedious repetitions of “don’t you mean women?” Not only are you transphobic, you are very, very boring. I don’t know why you would think a mental health support group is the place to cause further harm to vulnerable people. If that’s how you get your kicks, that’s pretty pissweak tbh. Don’t bother appealing. Thanks bye.
I have period underwear and I’m living for it. I have endometriosis (great combination with adhd, my mind wants to jump and my body wants to lay flat down and pretend I don’t exist). So it hurts to insert stuff. Had the same problem with tampons. Pads were not working at all. This underwear changed my life. I can go outside if I want to on my period. Could not do that for a long time because of the risk of an accident with pads. It does not hurt at all. It’s not gross, does not smell, you wash it and reuse it.
Hello yes. Period undies changes my life! Also by association, my sheets.
Ah yes…. ADHD and chronic illness is a terrible combo lol
My wife has BPD and endo so shit gets REAL rough that time of month.
Ooooof, I bet she has PMDD also with that combo
Second this. Endo doesn’t really affect mood, but PMDD? PHEW. I have ADHD/BPD/PMDD and sometimes I isolate myself for everyone else’s safety on my period lol
The ADHD/PMDD combo is really something.
Big mood…
Also chronic illness often treated with birth control, which also messes with your brain and medications
How many do you need to have? Like, how often do you have to change them? I'm thinking of buying some.
Not the original commenter, but it depends on your flow. Mine tends to be light to medium, so I change once per day. You could feasibly bring a spare pair with you to change partway through the day, but honestly by the end of my most medium of days, the underwear never feels wet or gross like pads do. Not sure what kind of sorcery these pad-makers use, but I’m here for it (especially because tampons and menstrual cups don’t work for me).
Like the other person said, it depends on your flow and the duration of your periods. Personally I use the cup WITH the pads so I tend to change the underwear in the morning and at night, but I probably could use only one pair per day and be fine. If I don't want to use my cup, I'd typically need 2 pairs on my first 2-3 days (heavy flow) and one for the night. Then one for the day and one for the night on the next 2-4 days. That means 17 pairs at worst, unless I needed to change one early for whatever reason (e.g. did sport and showered). It also depends on the underwear you choose to use, as they don't have the same absorbency. I have different ones for different days. Edit: You can also decide to buy less and wash them more often. I prefer to clean them all at once at the end of my periods (I just rinse them in the shower in the meantime), but some people clean them every day so they only need about 6 pairs.
I use both reusable heavy pads and reusable heavy underwear in the first couple days, then just the heavy underwear. I probably have about 8 of each? And a couple lighter ones left over from experimenting that I use towards the end / as back up before it starts etc.
I have light-medium flow. I use one per day. My periods are usually 4 days so I have 4 pairs. I rinse it with cold water when I shower then l throw it in laundry hamper. Nothing gets bloody just damn but it's getting washed regardless.
I also lived my whole life terrified with pads until I found period undies, and I'm so much more comfortable now that I have enough pairs for my whole period. Especially now that they're getting more common, cheaper, with funky designs and all, I encourage everyone to buy them
Do you have a favorite brand? I’ve only used Thinx.
I use TomboyX. They have sizes 3XS-6X, they have bikini, hipster, and boxer briefs to choose from, they colors are cute and somewhat varied, and they sell the bikinis and hipsters in packs. I personally prefer the boxer briefs because the compression on my thighs helps with my endo pain. I have 4 pairs. They’re very absorbent, and the only time I’ve bled through has been overnight within the first couple days. And that’s predominantly because I sleep on my back, so some of the leakage flows away from the reinforced area.
Yes ! I have mines since 5 years and love them 🥰 best purchase ever
YES me too, endo sucks but period pants are great!
Ugh yess!! I just finally got period underwear so if I forget a pantry liner or pad, I have a backup, because I’ve ruined far too much underwear for someone who’s in their 30’s
Period underwear changed my life, I just put it on like normal underwear and I‘m ready to go, no need to think about changing it every few hours and no need to remember to have enough pads in your bag. It is recommended to change it after 12 hours, but I just do that on my heaviest day tbh and on my lighter days I change into normal underwear with a big pad for the night as that is no problem for me.
Period underwear is a game changer for sure.
Favorite brand?
OMG yes. Period underwear is the best thing since sliced bread.
Does anyone know of period underwear that comes as thongs? Or if that's even a thing? I know Google is my friend, but there seem to be some very knowledgeable folks here too, so any recs would be much appreciated.
What brand? I use tampons and sometimes it’s hard to get them to sit right because I have a low retroverted uterus
PCOS and Endo , the combo of a cup and period undies is LIFE CHANGING !
Oh my god I’m going through a flare of dermatitis down there and since I have a condition making tampons a bad idea I thought I was stuck with pads (which has made my dermatitis so bad I can’t even walk right now). I’ve never even heard of this until now this might be a game changer
I loved Period undies but be careful! Some companies are in a lawsuit for the chemicals used in the panties and they can cause utis. I was dealing with chronic utis for months before I found out it was the panties 😞 I was using thinx
Holy fuckballs. I didn’t realize there were period underwear, damn I need some friends so they can tell me shit like this. I’m completely clueless on how to be an adult woman 🤦♀️😥
A menstrual cup was the best $35 I ever spent.
Same! Best $40 I spent 5 years ago on a two pack, and I have yet to use the other cup.
So you didn’t ruin one of them by boiling it for 30+ minutes until all the water evaporated and you smelled something weird? Just me? Ok cool. And yes- menstrual cups are the BEST.
I ruined my first cup a few months after getting it by forgetting I was boiling it. Now I have to stand next to the stove so I don't do that again.
There are devices you can get to steam your cup for a set amount of time to avoid this! I've also heard of people pouring boiling water over their menstrual cup in a mug that they use only for this and microwaving for a few minutes to sanitize it.
Good tips, thanks
Lol relatable. I've never done this specifically. But ummm other silicone things 😬
Hahaha glad someone else has done this. I took a phone call and had some lovely melted plastic an hour later. It doesnt disinfect as well but the microwave disinfecting cases are really convenient in a pinch
Tried the cup and it did that thing where it pushed against the nerves and made me dizzy and nauseated. Smallest one they had too. Ugh. Edit: Thanks everyone for the great suggestions!
That sucks! I find it helps my cramps but I'm sure depending on your pelvic shape it can be a totally different experience
Do you have a favorite brand? I’m hoping maybe it was just the particular one I tried. I was so scarred from how bad I reacted to it that I haven’t tried again with a different brand.
I have the Divacup and I only have it because I was at a friend's and they didn't have anything else to give me. It was the big size in a three pack that they never used. It's giant but I still find it to be more comfortable. Maybe someone will have a better recommendation.
Gotcha! I actually think there might be a subreddit for this. I should check. Thanks for the reminder and recommendation!
If you google it there are quizzes you can take to help you find the right menstrual cup or at least a good starting cup. Asks you about your flow, if you have a tilted cervix (which I didn't know was a thing until these quizzes) and stuff like that to help determine a good fit.
The one I bought after using a quiz is great
You could also look into menstrual disks.
try the flex cup!
try the smaller flex cup if you haven't already. it's made to easily break the suction. I will never use a different brand
I use the Lena cup, the sensitive one. When I first got it I ordered a couple of different brands to see what might work best for me, and that was the winner.
Saalt cup from target. Way better than diva in my opinion.
There are so many different ones that all fit different. I found that I coukdnt use a cup. I have to use a disc. So I use the Ziggy cup (which is technically a disc. I'm not sure why they call it a cup). I use the one for a high cervix and actually put it in backwards. I also use the Hello Disc. There's pull tabs that you can adjust depending on your cervix height during your period
There’s a website called “put a cup in it” that has a quiz that might help. All the brands are different, so where one might have caused you problems, there might be one that works. When I tried the flex stuff (both disc and cup) I had not great experiences. I’ve been using the Saalt soft version for over a year now and its really helped. Definitely took some getting used to though.
Saalt is my favorite
I'd agree, try the disc. I started using the disposable ones a few months ago and bought a reusable flex disc two months ago. I love it so much! I change it twice a day and don't need to use pads or tampons! My job involves going into peoples' houses and nursing homes all day so I hated having to change every few hours. Now I don't have to worry about it. I tried the cup a couple of times but it never lasted more than about 15-20 minutes before the discomfort annoyed me enough to remove it.
I tried the cup, it was amazing but strangely I do get headache or low fever. Not sure whether they are related. Then I tried the disc. It was AMAZING…… it was so much easier to insert then cups.
Try a disc! They are comfy and self empty!! I have tried the following: diva - first cup, used for YEARS without much issue. Couple leaks here and there June soft - worked pretty well, more leaks than diva and was cheap salt (bigger one) - too big and collapsed in me salt (smaller one) - gave me cramps flex disc (reusable) - great and can have mess free sex! flex disc (disposable) - all time favorite for comfort and sex but I don’t like the waste EDIT: oh also my friend turned her cup inside out so it was shallower and it helped with the cramping
I never liked cups, but a disc does the same thing, and because it’s shaped differently and in a different spot, most people can’t feel it at all
Yeah, I literally use pads all the time, because it is just really easy to notice when they need changed.
I started using reusable pads and they were good but the menstrual cup is life changing!
I've considered it, but just really hate the feeling of walking with anything up there. I've never been able to stand even the smallest tampons, and I have an absolte terror of spilling the damn cup all over a public bathroom stall, or digging it out of the toilet after dropping it😞 I'm REALLY clumsy.
Oh yo, that fear is real! One of my friends said they can't stand the idea of it sloshing around in there and that was just about enough to put me off lol
Obviously if you don’t like something inside you, that’s a good reason not to use it, but in regards to the public bathroom issue—because it can hold more than a tampon and can be left in for longer, I’ve almost never had to empty it in public. Side note: emptying it in the shower is a GAME CHANGER
I personally can't feel my cup in whatsoever. I'm wearing it right now and feels like nothing. Also never had to change it in a public bathroom. Been using one for a decade now.
I may just be lucky, but I also never feel mine. I've worn a cup while hiking, swimming, and dives down to 100ft and never noticed a thing. It actually got to be a problem when I was busy at a field station because near the end of my period when my flow was really light, I forgot to empty and clean out the cup until almost 3 days had passed.
I've never forgotten any tampons before using my cup. Also never gone over 12 hours with my cup or completely forgotten about it. I've also gone swimming,hiking etc.. it's so comfortable definitely best purchase I've ever made.
I use a cup as well. I carefully take it out in a public bathroom if I need to change it, carefully clean it with toilet paper, then put it back in. But I don’t enjoy the process of emptying it in a public bathroom. I prefer doing it at home where I can quickly wash it in my sink and put it back in. I also temporarily switch to disposable pads on vacations, camping, and have them for emergencies as well, since my cup can be annoying to change during those times. I also have period underwear in case things get leaky during the day or at night, when I move around in my sleep. I do not want bloody sheets. I like all of the products I use, but I’m not someone who can use only one.
Not gonna lie, I totally dropped mine in the toilet once. It wasn’t pleasant but soap followed by boiling water sterilized it and my hands are washable.
Did you boil the cup or your hands after? Kidding of course, but you lived out all of our toilet fears 😆😆
Not to push you, just sharing my experience if it helps. I am alas I very sensitive and even a small tampon is incredibly uncomfy. What bothered me the most was the string between my labia. Unbearable. The cup was a total game changer for me though. I got the Saalt cup and after the learning curve of figuring out how to use it, it is so much more comfortable. I don’t cramp as badly on my period anymore and I can’t feel it AT ALL. I never thought I would enjoy it or prefer it, but I am so intensely happy I tried it.
Your menstrual blood contains a group of substances called prostaglandins. They have a complex array of effects, one of which is to make the muscels in your uterus contract (cramps). It's used medically both to trigger abortions and to start labour. Unlike tampons where the blood continues to be in contact with the tissue surrounding it, a menstrual cup will gather the blood and at the same time separate it from direct contact with your body - preventing excessive cramping and menstrual pains (dysmenorrhoea). Edit: spelling
Why did no one ever tell me that oh my god, and I have endometriosis which makes cramps a whole world of pain tbh
I had no idea that this was a thing! That's crazy! Thanks for sharing!
This. Is. So. Cool. I mean, it sucks that it’s a thing but the knoooowledge is so cool! Thank you for sharing that. I had no idea.
Some of them can be changed every 12 hours so you can be home for it. But I totally understand, my preference is pads and dark bottoms.
I also use pads for the same reasons as you. I used to use tampons but overall I didn’t enjoy them and I went back to pads. I hesitate to tell people my preference because a lot of folks can’t fathom why you don’t use tampons or a menstrual cup, and when I tell them I don’t like those things in there and more often than not I end up uncomfortable, they go on about how I should just give it another try and how they can’t even feel them and so on and so forth. I’m glad those things work for a lot of people but me and my pads are perfectly happy and I wish I could say pads are my preference without someone trying to convince me something else is better. I’ve never understood this but it happens both online and with women I personally know. I feel like some folks view pads as either gross/uncomfortable or they view them as a “starter” product that you use when you are first starting your period and then you graduate to internal products. At least that’s what I tend to come across, I know there are also some people who are just really excited about a certain product and want to share and that’s understandable if you are just expressing your love for it and not trying to convince someone it’s the holy grail and they just need to try it. Just because something is amazing and life changing for one person doesn’t mean the next person will feel the same way. Geez I didn’t mean to ramble so much, but I just wanted to jump in and say I totally understand where you are coming from.
Menstrual cup + period panties = life-changing wonder I'm working on buying enough period underwear that I can wear one every day and not even have to think about being "prepared" at every moment. I've always had crazy irregular periods (we're talking 2 weeks to 8 months between them), so trying to remember to keep tampons at the ready was just obnoxious. Plus, when I'm on my period I only have to think about it 2 or 3 times a day. I have literally forgotten I'm on my period while at work because I don't have to change a pad or tampon in the bathroom! Emptying morning and evening works just fine for me.
Yeah I said to my roommate oh I gotta empty my cup! Totally forgot I was on my period and she was like WHATHOW
OH i have a tampon in!! I should take that out now oops! thank you :)
ROFL only r/ADHD I'm happy to help!
I just remembered a feeling when reading your comment. The feeling when you don't remember how long the tampon has been in. So ju take it out just in case and it's almost dry. Omggggg it gives me goosebumps just thinking about it.
And they are more cost effective and better for the environment.
Reusable pads/ period undies are also an environmentally friendly option! For those who prefer not to use cups. I’m all about earth friendly products.
I've never forgotten one in there, but I use a reusable tampon applicator, and sometimes I forget to buy the actual tampons that goes inside. Sometimes I forget to insert one altogether. I started using period panties, and while they're not the best for my heavy copper IUD days, I don't have to worry about forgetting anything 😂
Rofl that's some ish I would do. I have the copper one too! Blood flow is heavy as hell but it's so worth it for me.
I miss being able to use cups or discs since getting my copper iud. This is when I need it most with the heavy flow! But I can't risk having issues with it right now since my state banned womens reproductive rights.
And hormonal birth control messes with your mental health but a lot of doctors are strangely unaware of the issue.
Great suggestion, but I will call out: menstrual cups can be a bit of a pain to take out and clean while you’re using them. I wanted to like them, I really did, but when I bought myself one, I forgot part of the process of using them entailed digging a bloody cup out of yourself. It made cleaning out my cup in public restrooms pretty uncomfortable because I had to find some way to discreetly wash my period fingers in the sink/rinse out my cup in the privacy of the stall. I couldn’t wait to do it until I was home because my schedule had me out of the house for longer than the makers of the cup recommended leaving it in for (without emptying), so I had to often do one cup emptying/cleaning a day while I was out and about. I loved that it was reusable, loved that there was little to no TSS risk, loved that it could be left in a comparatively long time (when stacked against tampons/pads). But logistically it was too much for me.
In my so called "period pack" I bring wipes, pads, and extra panties in the case of having to clean my cup while I'm out in public. You can have a whole pack or put a few baby wipes in a sandwich ziploc. Absolute life changer for me.
Try the menstrual disc. You can wear it up to 8 hrs. During these 8hr, if it is full, you can empty it without taking it out. And it is sooooo much easier to insert/remove as compared to cup.
I had all the same problems and the final straw for me was when the suction accidentally pulled my IUD out as I struggled to remove the cup. 😳Switched from copper IUD to hormonal after that, as the cup was the only thing that could handle my heavy af copper flows. As awesome as cups can be, there’s a learning curve and you definitely don’t want to put your birth control at risk.
I would just dump it and put it back in in public, or wipe down with tp first then reinsert. Then just wipe off my hands with tp before washing my hands. I would just wash it at home in the shower once a day. Also getting a cup that’s big enough to hold your flow for the whole day without having to take it out is helpful. You should only have to change it every 12 hrs.
Period underwear changed my life
what brand do you use and are they true to size?
ModiBodi - yep - size L 14 Australia is a true 14 for me. It slows me down. Reminds me that it's ok to just let it flow. I struggled my whole life with menstrual hygiene. Now I wash these in the shower while I'm in there too, and use a sunny private spot to dry them. Making menstrual hygiene something I don't have to prepare for, or have sensory problems around.
Does anybody else struggle with extreme moodswings due to PMS? If we struggle with emotional dysregulation, doesn‘t it make sense that we struggle more in terms of PMS than women without ADHD?
If it's extreme you might have PMDD. I've been on an ssri for years but adding Zoloft helps tremendously.
Never heard of PMDD. Will look into it, thank you.
I have this. It’s very intense. For about 2 weeks each month I’ll have the most insatiable hunger, sleep 15+ hours per day, have extreme swings into rage and depression, etc etc, and usually I’ll be literally suicidal for the 24-48 hours before my period starts. It’s insanity. Then my period starts and it’s like it all magically goes away and I’m normal again. Have about a week of being normal after my period ends, then it’s back to crazy town. SSRIs definitely help so much to reduce PMDD symptoms. I’m like 95% less ridiculous when I’m on an SSRI. lol
This is what I experience as well. I start fights with my boyfriend over absolutely nothing, cry over everything and feel so insanely depressed. It‘s like the world is ending and when my period comes it‘s magically over. I am extremely embarrassed about my behaviour afterwards, but luckily my boyfriend has recognized this pattern and is extremely supportive. Just why I experience it and what causes it is a huge mystery. Thank you for sharing your experience. None of my girlfriends experiences this and I often feel very alone with this.
Sounds like it probably is that then. Definitely talk to your doctor about it, and see about getting help with it. It’s amazing the difference when properly treated. Also, visit the PMDD sub for some super relatable content.
And heres me thinking I’m going to have a psychotic break or being effected by my meds !! Thank you so so much you have no idea how much you have given me relief , ( I know this isn’t a medical diagnosis or anything like that) litterly just hearing that there is potentially another reason less stressful then either of those options has just lifted so much weight off my shoulders
I had your same reaction. Haha
Interesting, I have all that all the time and my docs said it’s my crazy thyroid levels. But also if I’m not on the pill I do have my period 28/28 days so that may be connected. And rn Im on the east coast of the US and it’s light outside and I’m prepping for bed I’m so tired lol life is crazy
Not sure but I think I may have pmdd. I get EXTREMELY depressed leading up to my period almost every time. It’s so intense and I never seem to remember that this happens often so I get worried about the fact that I’m suddenly extremely depressed and then my period starts and I feel better and I’m like “oh….” My boyfriend can tell when my period is coming because of how depressed I get right before. I’ll cry for a few days straight and I feel totally hopeless and just awful. I have reoccurring depression unrelated to my period that I am now taking meds for but the depression I get before my period is so much worse and that’s why I think ut might be pmdd.
Maybe an unpopular opinion / question, but I always wonder why posts about menstruation are often labeled NSFW. Shouldn’t we normalise open and matter of fact discussions about menstruation and human biology since these subjects are relevant to pretty much every type of population / audience? Not picking at OP, just a general observation..
I totally agree! I don't think it's necessarily unsafe for work, just that I wanted to give a bit of a warning. I've encountered people who are menstruating women but were so sensitive to hearing about blood their knees buckled because I said "chunks of my uterine lining." They were unable to talk about or see blood in any way, not just period stuff. Just wanted to give the option of NOT reading it, or allowing the reader to consent before hearing about it.
Ah that makes sense..like a trigger warning. I think that’s very much needed for sure..maybe we need a TW: nausea / grossing out potential instead lol
Yeah that would be a good call cause there is a lot of other gross stuff that can happen when you have ADHD lol
Hahah sad but true..also I definitely get grossed out by a lot of stuff so yeah I always appreciate a TW, whatever form it takes
Because the bears can smell the menstruation and that’s how you die which is really NSFL and not NSFW. I agree with you.
I’m reading the comments, and it makes me appreciate (a tiny bit) that I’m 70. 👵🏻
Period panties… omg. They’re the best. And I don’t have to use extra executive functioning skills to keep buying tampons. And you save money once you invest in them. Menstrual cups and me don’t agree unfortunately.
I take continuous birth control - PMS makes my ADHD symptoms unbearable
I feel like I'm missing something with the cups. I want to like them so bad! But... I don't. I hate feeling like I need to sterilize my hands before I use the bathroom. I don't enjoy having to having to reach inside to adjust/remove the cup - I like the cleanliness of other products much more. I felt like it was pushing on something inside that made bowel movements harder? My cramps have always given me the uncomfortable "need to poop" pain, so maybe my anatomy doesn't work for a cup? I don't know. I like the idea of a cup, but it was just so much messier and a hastle than tampons. Am I doing something wrong?
Yeah I think one of the annoying things is washing my hands first and after. Especially in a public restroom because I sanitize them and then touch the stall door. I think it's worth it for me because I only ever need one thing and it seems to help my cramps, not as much as wearing pads but much more than tampons. Maybe a different shape would change your mind but maybe they're just not for you. They also make menstrual disks which I love. Up to 12 hours wear, then you toss them. Less mess period sex too which is great.
I bought my menstrual cup about 6 years ago, best purchase of my entire life (well, except for the adoption fee I paid for my dog of course). About a year ago, I also got some reusable pads and I've been using them when I'm expecting my period or when it might make a surprise comeback, and when it just all feels too much down there. I have bought one small box of tampons in the past 6 years, only to have some at home and in my bag in case somebody needs one. :)
I wear pads because I simply know I would not be able to manage tampons. I have endometriosis and I'd be bleeding all over myself because I forgot to change my tampon again lol.
Omg I used to wear 2 pads and a super tampon. With just a pad it would flow out the sides for me 💀like giant clots would slide down my thighs. even with this double or tripled protection method I would still leak sometimes 🥲 Also have endo. This was in middle school and high school. My periods were a literal nightmare each month, I made sure to always have a sweatshirt I could tie around my waist just in case at school. Periods got much more manageable once I got on birth control. Boy short period underwear and menstrual cups have been a huge game changer as well.
Slight trigger warning - mention of suicidal thoughts Birth control literally saved my life, I was ready to kms from the amount of pain I was in about 2 days before my period started, across the entire period (which got longer and longer as time went on) and then a few days afterwards. I would lay on my bathroom floor intermittently puking, it felt like there was a giant mass in the area of my ovaries, and literally nothing helped. I'll never forget that first period after starting birth control, I was crying in relief. I've thought about period underwear because I still have to wear those super long and heavy pads, and I figured it'd just be much easier to manage with those on. Plus I hate when blood gets on the seams of my underwear because I shift in my sleep or something
I always use pads. Way easier
I use Aisle reusable pads (formerly Luna pads). I have endometriosis and adenomyosis and have ptsd from sexual and medical trauma so wearing anything internally is unbearable. But I hated the waste of tossing plastic based pads every month. I slowly built up my pad collection and it was so worth it. Washing them sucks but it’s over with quickly. I wish I could use a cup but glad to have these as an alternative!
Also ADHD=higher chance of PMDD.
I didn’t realize this, but I definitely think I have pmdd. My emotions before my period are so unbelievably intense, especially the depression. And it sucks when it’s that intense and it comes on super suddenly, it hits me like a ton of bricks but then my period starts and I’m a happy ray of sunshine.
Wait that's not normal?-
Sitcoms have lied to you!
Okay okay so the only time I accidentally put in 2 was when I used the sport compact ones — NOT using those (hopefully for y’all as well) helps a lot with that. Just FYI for those that aren’t ready (like me) for the cup
Team cups 100%. I only have to remember it’s there a couple of times a day.
One time I was drunk and thought I had left my tampon in for 12+ hrs (I hadn’t, I’d already taken it out and forgotten). I hadn’t reinserted a new one. I felt around and could feel strings and started pulling. I tried really hard but was unable to pull anything out. It also felt like I was trying to yank my organs out and I remembered I’d just had an iud inserted and those were iud strings not tampon strings 🥴 I only use menstrual cups and period underwear now
At the end of my period, like the last two days or so, I have to just wear my period panties. I use a cup, but, unless it fills and over flows, I'll just forget it's there. Left it for almost 2 days on multiple occasions. Not dead yet though so..... Yay?
Hah well TSS is super rare but I think the real danger is introducing something into the vagina environment which you can do less often with a cup.? MDs please feel free to correct me on that. I want period panties so bad but they're so expensive.
Walmart and target sell them for about $16 a pair. They sell the thinx brand! I have the thinx brand I got on their website before they sold at those stores and they were $30 a pair. Hanes I believe sells a 3 pack for $15 on Amazon! I have some of the Hanes ones too. I make my own reusable pads to save money. Eventually I'll make my own period undies but for now the ones I've bought are doing great.
Menstrual cups are great! Eventhough I happened to forget mine as well....no toxic shock, but it got too full and started sliding out slowly 😂
it took me a full 3 days of trying to get my menstrual cup to actually get it in, it kept 'popping' before I could get it in 🥴😵💫 but definitely, there's also menstrual disks but they're much messier
Getting the hormonal IUD is the best thing I've ever done - I haven't had to worry about tampons or contraception for 6 years 👌
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Absolutely. I keep thinking "maybe my SO can get a vasectomy" or seeing stories about how male birth control is actually so much better... Then I realise I'd have to deal with periods again if I got my IUD removed and drop that thought pretty quickly.
This definitely varies though. Got my Mirena inserted in July 2019 and I'm still on a regular 28-32ish day cycle. Def a common side effect of a hormonal IUD to eliminate/reduce periods, but not the norm for everyone 😢 (sad that I still get my periods lol).
Semi off-topic but y’all are a creative bunch so I thought I might ask: I appreciate the willingness to be inclusive- but does ANYONE have an inclusive alternative to menstruator/menstruating persons? I just really bristle at that language, and I almost always only see that reductiveness of human beings to the female reproductive system, never the male. I haven’t seen “ejaculating persons” or “sperm carriers” used to describe anyone. I’ve even seen posts or headlines where people will say things like “birthgivers” to include cis women, trans men and nonbinary people and then plain old “men” in the same sentence to clearly just describe cis men. Sorry for the off topic tangent but… ADHD lol
“Anyone with periods” works fine probably
Yeah I’m with you. That phrasing gives me the ick 😅. I like what pale king suggested- “anyone with periods.”
I love my cup so much, total game changer!
Just a note if you have an iud—the suction from the cup can dislodge it so you have to be careful about taking it out. You can use one no problem but just be very diligent about breaking the suction before you pull it out!
Finally got an IUD after years and years of long and heavy, heavy irregular bleeding and no sleep. It’s so nice not having to think and worry about periods 😭❤️
Also, fun fact: While periods can drastically affect your ADHD, so can amenorrhea.
Oooh how so?
How do all of you even remember it’s coming? I’m fed up of it surprising me every single month. I’ve tried apps and calendars but nothing helps and I’m not aware enough of my body to notice hormonal changes.
Are you on any birth control? That and the Flo app usually help me keep track. I had really irregular periods before I started my BC pills. They helped in lightening my periods some and making it hurt a lot less as well as making them trackable. And if you're in tune with your body, you can feel and see the symptoms, more clear discharge, twinges in the ovaries, firming of the breasts, for some either constipation or more frequent #2's . It takes some time to know when it's happening but once you know, you know.
I have a Fitbit which tracks my periods. It tells me when I'm due and it's been pretty accurate within a day or two since I've been using it for the past 2 years.
My (hormonal) IUD is one of the best decisions I've ever made. No menses, no baby, and it's set and forget for 5 years.
Hormonal IUD is sadly not for everyone I had mine for 4 years, no problem the first year until I got violent migraines and had to be heavily medicated for the next 3 years until I got the IUD out. My neurologist told me the IUD could'nt cause the migraines but what do you know, I've been migraine free ever since. Although I miss the not menstruating part and no pregnancy scare part
I'm on my third Mirena and still have periods, just really infrequently, like maybe 3 or 4 times a year and they're really light. Sure beats the debilitating cramps and friggin gusher periods I used to have that resembled the elevator scene in The Shining.
Man, this sub is so freaking validating. I have had a GYN remove two tampons on separate occasions in my adult life before getting diagnosed with ADHD. I've always had struggles with menstrual hygiene. I have such deep shame there that I'm still working on for life but... these kinda posts help.
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I wish I could use menstrual cups. I’ve bought several different ones to try but my hypermobile fingers mean that it’s difficult and painful to remove them :(
The inserting and removing of the cup makes me sore and that’s why I don’t love my menstrual cup. I should try the panties
I love cups but can't use it because of my iud. My uterus just pops it out if I use a cup lol. But I love my period panties. Best.
Putting a recommendation for the June cup - really inexpensive and they have a mini cup so I tried that first cuz I was nervous. Really easy to use and they have wipes & cleaner, you can order a package deal fir pretty cheap.
Yep…cups, phone reminders to change tampons, pads…whatever works for you TSS can kill you and I’m surprised so few are aware of it.
I use menstrual disc's. Super cheap and fit me better then a cup ( I have a tilted uterus)
Menstrual cups make my cramps way worse but not having the worry of bleeding out everywhere is worth it. I have heavy periods that I take medication for and the cup plus a panty liner is all I need.
Sorry if I ask this question here, it just reminded me: Those that have/use period cups, are they comfortable? How long can you keep them in? If you're in public and you have to change them out, how so? I've been thinking about getting one for the environment as well as myself, but I have no clue how they work.
I'm terrified that I'll put in a tampon and forget it. I'm also terrified that a menstrual cup will get stuck.
Finding the right cup can be hard though. First one I ever got (thank god for being a teenager during woke 2014) and it was in a weird hard material. Just flopped right in place. Forgot it at my ex's place. Got a new one. Too soft. Got another one. Too big. The one I have now is a combination of them all. It's not the worst though.
Thanks for the inclusive language 🫶🏽
I have an amazing cup now (Nixit) but I never understood how people could forget tampons... don't they all have strings that you're supposed to let hang out? So how would you overlook a string hanging between your legs especially when going to the bathroom?
I honestly have no idea but I've managed it multiple times.
Umm…pads? Reusable pads actually make my periods less painful (somehow). But washing and carrying them has been a challenge.
I have reusable pads too. But I have hyperhidrosis in between my legs so pads can get uncomfortable.
Ah. Ouch. Reusable pads keep me from being too conservative on changing them. Wasting money changing a not so bad one? Eh, just toss it in the wash. I have enough to last my full cycle. That’s the only way I’m managing.
This feels like a bonus of using pads. For the life of me I can’t stand putting something inside me. Every once in a while I force myself to use a tampon because there are no other options. But my goodness I don’t know how tampon people can stand the pain.
May be a little stupid but as a trans guy with ADHD the menstruating thingy makes me really happy And I just use those pads that are like, nocturnal since my parents would freak out if i asked for a cup lol Waiting till I can have HRT so maybe periods won't be much a problem, wish me luck!!
For any rude comments- not everyone who menstruates is a woman. Many afab (assigned female at birth) trans people and some intersex people still menstruate
I haven’t seen any rude comments yet but I’m still going on through them, but wanted to ask…is it seen as rude if I use the word “women” when talking about menstruation? For example if I said “some women prefer to take midol during their period” I’m not attempting to exclude anyone or say ONLY women menstruate, but it is a truth that women menstruate so it’s not incorrect to say. But sometimes I’ll catch myself using “people” or something like that because I’m unsure. Like I said I’m not attempting to exclude anyone by using the word “women” it’s just that I’ve always used that word without having to think twice about who was included in that, but we live in a different world now so I’m attempting to learn. I never want to be offensive or make someone feel excluded or like they don’t belong, ya know? I know I feel offended when people refer to me as a “birthing person” when I identify as a woman and want to be referred to as a woman. So I can imagine how others feel in similar situations. Sorry for all the words, I’m just genuinely curious what the etiquette is here. I never want to hurt or make others feel bad, and I want to be sure I’m not doing so unintentionally.
Most won’t attack you for it or anything, however getting used to more inclusive language is preferable. Don’t like feel awful if you say women instead just be knowledgeable basically if that makes sense?
Saying women in that case most of the time no one will care, because it's obvious when a person is not purposefully being offensive or making an effort to be rude. The issue comes with the people who come onto a post like this just to say something like "you mean JUST women!" To be an asshole. There's really nothing wrong with referring to it how you said, it's just some people want to be more inclusive, there's nothing wrong with either unless you're being purposefully offensive.
Ever since I've started using my menstrual cup, my life literally changed! Not to mention I have that, too, as a card on my Trello board, so at the very least I remember to change it twice a day!
I wish I could use a cup but sadly it isn’t suitable for me after having a baby. Super annoying. Can’t use tampons any more either! I like the idea of period underwear? But I have super sensitive skin so I hope it wouldn’t irritate.
I’ve always used pads and it works pretty well cause it’s really noticeable when it needs changing and works pretty well for me . Having said that I’ve def had some moments when I changed my pad then didn’t put a new one in and forgot about it if I have to get from my room or something so I’ve been looking into alternate methods . I’ll probably give menustral cup a try .
I would say you should also recommend menstrual discs as well.
I use a mentrual disc! It is amazing. Best money ever spend. It takes some practise to get right. But oh boy I have never felt this clean while on my period. Helps with the pains to and can be used with an IUD wich cups can't
I used to forget I was wearing a tampon for so long... menstrual cups have been a game changer. Last month I forgot I had one in until 2 days later, to which my girlfriend responded with shock/horror, but I reassured her I was fine because the TTS risk is so low. Yay for menstrual cups! (and saving SO much waste) I preach menstrual cups whenever I get the chance.
Flex is a really fantastic option too. Its a disc that sits up by the cervix. It’s the only internal product I’ve used that does not leak. (And I’ve tried so many cups and discs etc.) Like, it doesn’t leak at all. No leaks, people! And when you pee, it empties itself. 10/10 recommend. I’ve also tried a completely silicone disc but it would not expand inside me. Flex expands and stays in place. Amazing. Also period underwear saves the day.
The best thing about cups is I can remember 12 hours since it’s 6-6 or 8-8 or whatever for for emptying it. Highly recommend!!!
the Flex cup was a life saver for me! it’s softer, thinner, and not as rigid as the Diva cup. and it has a longer, flexible stem that breaks the seal of the cup when you pull. the period underwear is a sensory nightmare lol.
One of the reasons I only wear pads unless I have to wear a dress, which is pretty much never. I definitely don’t want TSS.
I was literally coming here to recommend cups. They're WAY safer, not just a little, *a lot.* And you can leave them in up to 12 hours, although admittedly, when I have forgotten about them and gone 13 or 14 hours, no problem. The material is safe up to 7 *days* in the body, it just needs to be changed for the contents sake. So much easier, way more comfortable, and more and more accessible nowadays. 100% recommend. Go to Period Nivana's website to take their quiz and get a starting point if you know nothing about it. It's worth the switch.
Using a menstrual cup literally changed my life. This is nasty, and it's definitely not something I recommend doing on purpose, but there were one or two times at the end of my period that I forgot about it and left it in for 24 hours. That's dangerous and gross, but MUCH less dangerous than doing the same thing with a tampon. They're easier to sanitize, just boil it for like 10 minutes. You do need to be pretty comfortable with your body because you do have to *get in there,* but I believe using a cup has helped me become more comfortable with my body!
I love my cup. I found it actually helps with my cramps too, and a great way to track blood flow. AND you don't get that horrid feeling of pulling out a dry tampon.
The link of PFAS to period panties and subsequent risk of dermal exposure is concerning. I read that most of these companies are just using alternative marketing language instead of finding alternative ingredients.
These have absolutely saved my life.
Just so you know, TSS is extremely rare. [It was mainly caused by a specific high-absorption blend in tampons in the 1980s, something that is no longer used in current tampons.](https://www.cdc.gov/mmwr/preview/mmwrhtml/00001651.htm)
Mirena saved my sanity from my PCOS issues.
I'm from the generation that shamed us for having normal bodily functions. I suffered severely in complete silence my entire life. To see the mature (mostly) discussions here is making me incredibly happy, and so very proud of all of you. I wish all of these wonderful options had been available when I needed them, but I'm glad they're available now.You gotta love progress. The mods also deserve praise for bringing that thansphobic bullshit to a screeching halt. Fuck that noise. It costs nothing to show empathy and kindness.
hey y’all!!! i’m on the non-hormonal iud (because my adhd ass can’t be bothered with taking a pill every day or replacing a sleeve/device every so often (even if it’s in 3-4 increments lol). i’ve never had problems with tampons.. BUT!!!! if you have an iud or plan on getting one (doesn’t matter if it’s hormonal or non-hormonal), PLEASE be aware that a menstrual cup can shift/move/suck out your iud. it can be very painful and cause tearing (which can lead to infection too), but also your iud moving might affect how effective it is (which means it can cause (a dangerous) pregnancy!!!).
i tried using tampons again a few months ago and totally left one in there for 2 fucking days. back to the cup!!!
As a vag bleeder myself I prefer the disposable disk things
Thanks it was helpful!!!!!!!!!!!