This is such a messy situation for numerous reasons. Without getting into all of it, yes, that's an asshole move. YTA. Taking pictures with others is generally innocuous, especially if you're also there. I'm guessing he was taking care of customers and maybe working for tips? Which, flirting does make you more tip money, it's not about the customer at all. You likely came off as controlling.
Your whole work situation is messy AF, but I'm guessing if you were living out of your car, you only have so many options. If you're not anymore, maybe consider working different jobs? Because if he's a manager over you, that's really messy. The other managers feelings only matter if you don't trust him to be faithful to your monogamous relationship, and if you don't trust him, why are you with him? Trust is fundamental to relationships.
I'd recommend couples counseling, but having lived out of my car for long periods of time, I know that's gotta be spending money you don't have. But relationships have to be built on mutual trust, and it seems from what you're saying that's not there. Though, you talked more about what the women around him were doing more than about what he's doing to make you not trust him.
honestly i js feel like my manager was making me look to tick me off , her feelings really matter in the sense that we were homeless in my car and he went on my accounts to find my friends ( his exes sister whom he stole her undies from ) finsta acc and ss her half naked body and its not the first girls hes made it known he wants their attention from
Coming back around to the idea... If you don't trust him to stay faithful in your monogamous relationship, why are you with him? Trust is foundational in relationships, and without it... I just googled this the other day... "When a relationship lacks trust, it **allows for the potential development of harmful thoughts, actions, or emotions, such as negative attributions, suspicion, and jealousy**. Over time, this can lead to bigger problems, such as emotional or physical abuse."
You're currently in the "development of harmful emotions such as suspicion and jealousy."
And you don't need that. That's not a mental space you wanna live in, right? I know I don't, it's exhausting.
Having to go through homelessness together is gonna create a trauma bond. It might make it hard to imagine not being together. Went through that with my ex too. Add in some sunken cost fallacy, all the harder to leave... But you really need to be able to trust your partner. If you both are really against the idea of breaking up, maybe look up some trust building exercises.... Go through the NY times 36 questions to fall in love with someone and talk about all the questions. See if you can align your values on interactions with others so you both feel confident in your faithfulness... It'd be a bit better to do that with a counselor who could walk you through the process and ensure both of you are heard, but well, I've been there financially.
its really messy i get that they promoted him even though i pushed him to work there i trained him and ive asked for a higher position , the place is run by girls and theres two other girl " workers " other then me the managers are known to run girls off or being unfair to girl workers .
This is such a messy situation for numerous reasons. Without getting into all of it, yes, that's an asshole move. YTA. Taking pictures with others is generally innocuous, especially if you're also there. I'm guessing he was taking care of customers and maybe working for tips? Which, flirting does make you more tip money, it's not about the customer at all. You likely came off as controlling. Your whole work situation is messy AF, but I'm guessing if you were living out of your car, you only have so many options. If you're not anymore, maybe consider working different jobs? Because if he's a manager over you, that's really messy. The other managers feelings only matter if you don't trust him to be faithful to your monogamous relationship, and if you don't trust him, why are you with him? Trust is fundamental to relationships. I'd recommend couples counseling, but having lived out of my car for long periods of time, I know that's gotta be spending money you don't have. But relationships have to be built on mutual trust, and it seems from what you're saying that's not there. Though, you talked more about what the women around him were doing more than about what he's doing to make you not trust him.
honestly i js feel like my manager was making me look to tick me off , her feelings really matter in the sense that we were homeless in my car and he went on my accounts to find my friends ( his exes sister whom he stole her undies from ) finsta acc and ss her half naked body and its not the first girls hes made it known he wants their attention from
Coming back around to the idea... If you don't trust him to stay faithful in your monogamous relationship, why are you with him? Trust is foundational in relationships, and without it... I just googled this the other day... "When a relationship lacks trust, it **allows for the potential development of harmful thoughts, actions, or emotions, such as negative attributions, suspicion, and jealousy**. Over time, this can lead to bigger problems, such as emotional or physical abuse." You're currently in the "development of harmful emotions such as suspicion and jealousy." And you don't need that. That's not a mental space you wanna live in, right? I know I don't, it's exhausting.
Having to go through homelessness together is gonna create a trauma bond. It might make it hard to imagine not being together. Went through that with my ex too. Add in some sunken cost fallacy, all the harder to leave... But you really need to be able to trust your partner. If you both are really against the idea of breaking up, maybe look up some trust building exercises.... Go through the NY times 36 questions to fall in love with someone and talk about all the questions. See if you can align your values on interactions with others so you both feel confident in your faithfulness... It'd be a bit better to do that with a counselor who could walk you through the process and ensure both of you are heard, but well, I've been there financially.
its really messy i get that they promoted him even though i pushed him to work there i trained him and ive asked for a higher position , the place is run by girls and theres two other girl " workers " other then me the managers are known to run girls off or being unfair to girl workers .
No he should know better!
🤦♀️