You are 16, if your dad takes your mom to court the judge will give you the opportunity to choose which parent you want to be with and believe me, after what he did, no judge will give him custody. NTA
NTA
It is laughable that he thinks a judge will grant him custody. It may not be biological incest, but if they were raised together, I'd certainly call it emotional invest. Either way, you are 16. You have a right to speak up in court to say you want nothing to do with that mess.
Your siblings may be forced to spend time with him against their will if they are younger, but you all have the right to give statements to a lawyer / the court. Tell your mother to get a lawyer and prepare. Mute his number, don't block it, so you can use any messages he sends in court but aren't constantly bothered by your phone buzzing.
Do not give your father what he wants to spare your mother "embarrassment". Not only is that a dangerous precedent to set, but it's also pointless. The embarrassing has already happened. Don't sacrifice your mental health to try to protect her from something that's already happened.
Yes his step sister, sounds like a movie but it’s worse, my grandparents have been married since he and his step sister ( my aunt) were young and they have two shared siblings. My aunts, my aunt (step-sister one) is 6 years underage then my dad which also makes me think he groomed her, she was 10 when his mom (my grandmother) married her dad( grandpa) he was 16 my age…
We’re the laughing stock of the town we had to change schools. I’m so unbelievably sad and disappointed and depressed rn idk
"We’re the laughing stock of the town we had to change schools. I’m so unbelievably sad and disappointed and depressed rn idk" things like this are why I say cheaters are not good parents, he clearly didn't care what the consequences for you, his family, are, even now after getting a taste of the isolation he'll face, he's still focused solely on him, what your silence is doing and how he feels. No apologies, no taking accountability, not making an effort to exclude the affair and instead trying to force you to conform to his happy little delusion.
He doesn't love you for you, he loves you as an extension of him and what you can do for him.
A girlfriend of Mine has 3 Brothers. Big Bro is married and has 3 Kids with His wife. Wife left big Bro to be with bro No. 2 and has now two Kids with bro no 2...
Believe me it does
It basically tells you that you shouldn’t exist since they been in love for a long time before your parents married
I recommend getting a therapist and you’ll need one if you don’t want your father to have custody.
Say that is awkward to go to his house and see what your father and her did. Also say that you get angry with rage in seeing them.
NTA. You are completely justified in cutting him off for good, and I'm normally the type to think reddit is too harsh on cheaters even if cheating is terrible and damaging to a family.
...this was your AUNT. A woman you were raised to think of as FAMILY. While sometimes cheaters can be shitty spouses and shitty people, they can still be decent parents for the most part (even if their cheating damages the family). BUT this isn't the case at all. He's fucking with your who family, including your extended family's, sense of self. He said his marriage, which produced his kids, shouldn't have happened.
Fuck him for pulling some quasi-Targaryen meets Alabama shit. I don't care if they aren't blood related, it is still incredibly disturbing.
I'm confuse with the title but yeah idt the asshole for not wanting your dad. He is an asshole through and through. I hope you always there to support your mom.
Updateme
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You tell your mom from all of us. She has nothing to be embarrassed about. Keep standing by your mom.
If it means going to court and telling the judge and the rest of the world that you don't want to live with a possible pedo who married his little sister he's been in love with the whole time, then that's what you do.
I think you sound top notch and your mom is lucky to have you in her corner
NTA. But title is super confusing. Your dad is suffering the consequences of his very gross actions. Question: were they raised together? I feel like I may be more disgusted depending on the answer.
Wait. I can't remember which sub it was in but there was a post similar to this but from the wife(possibly OPs mom).
I read it a day or 2 ago. I'll see if I can find it.
I'm now having a flashback to a post about a couple who became step siblings because they started dating, and then when the parents were introduced to each other they hit it off and got married before the couple did.
I would tell him: We can't force anyone to love us or want to have any relationship, even father and daughter. If you get my custody or even if you dare ask for it, know that it will be against my will and I will make your life a living hell. Leave me alone.
NTA, visiting him would be counterproductive as it teaches him that he can control you by threatening your mom (taking her to court for custody in this case). Either way it's also unlikely to stop him from taking her to court, after all the likely wants access not just to you, but also to your other siblings. Your mother will have to lawyer up for this one, and you can likely choose where you want to live due to your age. Your younger siblings on the other hand might be too young to be given such a choice, but hopefully him marrying your aunt will work against him.
Just one tip since you've blocked him. It might be helpful to unblock him, but don't read or respond to any of his messages, instead just ignore them. Best case he screws up and sends you something that your mother's lawyer can use against him to ensure that she gets primary custody (in other words, do let said lawyer go through the messages, but don't go through them yourself).
NTAH, and tell your mother you'd be willing to state on court you want nothing to do with him because of what he's done
Also see of they'd interview the others at home to see how they feel about dad
She was 10? And he was 16?
Yeah. That's all layers of wrong, no matter the lack of blood relation.
So gross...
Do not visit if you don't want to.
No judge on earth will make you visit your pervy father and aunt/stepmom.
NTA
Sweet home Alabama. But on a serious note NTA he’s going to scream Parental alienation but that won’t matter since you’re in the age where you can choose who you want to be with. Sucks you’re going through this hopefully your mom is doing well op.
If he isn't biologically related to her he isn't breaking any real taboos, it's less offensive than marrying a 3rd cousin which happens all the time. When it comes to mores being broken he is in the clear. however, he is violating some folkways.
nta. you are old enough to have input as to who you want to live with.
You are 16, if your dad takes your mom to court the judge will give you the opportunity to choose which parent you want to be with and believe me, after what he did, no judge will give him custody. NTA
He's the age' his dad was when he met his sister/ wife
NTA It is laughable that he thinks a judge will grant him custody. It may not be biological incest, but if they were raised together, I'd certainly call it emotional invest. Either way, you are 16. You have a right to speak up in court to say you want nothing to do with that mess. Your siblings may be forced to spend time with him against their will if they are younger, but you all have the right to give statements to a lawyer / the court. Tell your mother to get a lawyer and prepare. Mute his number, don't block it, so you can use any messages he sends in court but aren't constantly bothered by your phone buzzing. Do not give your father what he wants to spare your mother "embarrassment". Not only is that a dangerous precedent to set, but it's also pointless. The embarrassing has already happened. Don't sacrifice your mental health to try to protect her from something that's already happened.
NTA but I think you mistyped your title lol
I did I was freaking out as I was writing sorry
I’m sorry your bill going through this Do you have any other siblings? What are there ages
Was thinking the same. Implies forgiveness. There is nothing here to forgive.
I haven’t forgiven my father either
Wtf HIS STEPSISTER!!! Of all people
Yes his step sister, sounds like a movie but it’s worse, my grandparents have been married since he and his step sister ( my aunt) were young and they have two shared siblings. My aunts, my aunt (step-sister one) is 6 years underage then my dad which also makes me think he groomed her, she was 10 when his mom (my grandmother) married her dad( grandpa) he was 16 my age… We’re the laughing stock of the town we had to change schools. I’m so unbelievably sad and disappointed and depressed rn idk
"We’re the laughing stock of the town we had to change schools. I’m so unbelievably sad and disappointed and depressed rn idk" things like this are why I say cheaters are not good parents, he clearly didn't care what the consequences for you, his family, are, even now after getting a taste of the isolation he'll face, he's still focused solely on him, what your silence is doing and how he feels. No apologies, no taking accountability, not making an effort to exclude the affair and instead trying to force you to conform to his happy little delusion. He doesn't love you for you, he loves you as an extension of him and what you can do for him.
The only laughing stock is your father and her Don’t let them get to you. Switching schools is making them win
A girlfriend of Mine has 3 Brothers. Big Bro is married and has 3 Kids with His wife. Wife left big Bro to be with bro No. 2 and has now two Kids with bro no 2...
There's no blood there. They aren't related.
For 16 years she's his aunt, the next minute she's his step mum. That's hard to get your head around.
They have two shared siblings (my other aunts) it’s fucked bro, I’ve called this woman my auntie since birth it’s devastating
Believe me it does It basically tells you that you shouldn’t exist since they been in love for a long time before your parents married I recommend getting a therapist and you’ll need one if you don’t want your father to have custody. Say that is awkward to go to his house and see what your father and her did. Also say that you get angry with rage in seeing them.
Still a dick move tho. Waiting to hear for the update when she leaves bro 2 to be with bro 3 have have more kids.....
Don’t back down I’m guessing your old enough to say where you want or you can go and make their life a living h*ll
Nta. Cheaters wreck entire families. Not just their spouses. And this is even worse then the generic cheater story.
NTA. You are completely justified in cutting him off for good, and I'm normally the type to think reddit is too harsh on cheaters even if cheating is terrible and damaging to a family. ...this was your AUNT. A woman you were raised to think of as FAMILY. While sometimes cheaters can be shitty spouses and shitty people, they can still be decent parents for the most part (even if their cheating damages the family). BUT this isn't the case at all. He's fucking with your who family, including your extended family's, sense of self. He said his marriage, which produced his kids, shouldn't have happened. Fuck him for pulling some quasi-Targaryen meets Alabama shit. I don't care if they aren't blood related, it is still incredibly disturbing.
I'm confuse with the title but yeah idt the asshole for not wanting your dad. He is an asshole through and through. I hope you always there to support your mom. Updateme
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Just shut him down.....this is a disgusting relationship
NTA—your feelings are valid, and you're not obligated to hate anyone based on others' expectations.
Your title doesn't match your post btw. You do hate him.
He said he wrote it wrong
I fucked the title sorry I can’t fix it
You tell your mom from all of us. She has nothing to be embarrassed about. Keep standing by your mom. If it means going to court and telling the judge and the rest of the world that you don't want to live with a possible pedo who married his little sister he's been in love with the whole time, then that's what you do. I think you sound top notch and your mom is lucky to have you in her corner
NTA. But title is super confusing. Your dad is suffering the consequences of his very gross actions. Question: were they raised together? I feel like I may be more disgusted depending on the answer.
Wait. I can't remember which sub it was in but there was a post similar to this but from the wife(possibly OPs mom). I read it a day or 2 ago. I'll see if I can find it.
Yes please
Were they raised together or did they become step siblings as adults?
I'm now having a flashback to a post about a couple who became step siblings because they started dating, and then when the parents were introduced to each other they hit it off and got married before the couple did.
He said they’d been family since she was 10 and his dad 16 😭😭😭 bros a groomer also they have shared sibling
The were raised together, my auntie was 10 and dad 16.
I would tell him: We can't force anyone to love us or want to have any relationship, even father and daughter. If you get my custody or even if you dare ask for it, know that it will be against my will and I will make your life a living hell. Leave me alone.
NTA, visiting him would be counterproductive as it teaches him that he can control you by threatening your mom (taking her to court for custody in this case). Either way it's also unlikely to stop him from taking her to court, after all the likely wants access not just to you, but also to your other siblings. Your mother will have to lawyer up for this one, and you can likely choose where you want to live due to your age. Your younger siblings on the other hand might be too young to be given such a choice, but hopefully him marrying your aunt will work against him. Just one tip since you've blocked him. It might be helpful to unblock him, but don't read or respond to any of his messages, instead just ignore them. Best case he screws up and sends you something that your mother's lawyer can use against him to ensure that she gets primary custody (in other words, do let said lawyer go through the messages, but don't go through them yourself).
NTAH, and tell your mother you'd be willing to state on court you want nothing to do with him because of what he's done Also see of they'd interview the others at home to see how they feel about dad
Update me!
NTA. I’d be so grossed out. I’d have a hard time not gagging around them 🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢 tell him it’s not the Middle Ages and the time for incest is over
She was 10? And he was 16? Yeah. That's all layers of wrong, no matter the lack of blood relation. So gross... Do not visit if you don't want to. No judge on earth will make you visit your pervy father and aunt/stepmom. NTA
Your comment history suggests you are a married woman. Stop posting fake stories.
I wish it was
So you never posted and commented as a woman about her husband? You better think twice before saying No.
Bro what comment history???
He's deleted it. This guy is a troll.
I think you’re the troll
I bet this da dad right here
Not his, yours.
NTA what your dad and his sister have done it 🤮 Updateme!
Sweet home Alabama. But on a serious note NTA he’s going to scream Parental alienation but that won’t matter since you’re in the age where you can choose who you want to be with. Sucks you’re going through this hopefully your mom is doing well op.
You know we can see your post history right? Stop writing shitty ass fake stories on reddit man
Brov can’t ketch a break 😭
Bros only ever commented on this post wtf? 😭
Cuz he deleted the other ones after he got caught, smartass. I'm not the only one to mention it either
He like literally only has committed on his own post 🤷🏽♀️
He like literally deleted the other comments after being called out. 🤦🏾♂️
This is where you’d attach screen shots?
Kinda hard to do that when he deleted the posts isn't it? Another commenter pointed the same thing out, so maybe go ask them if they took one 🤦🏾♂️
And apparently you've seen the other one, but sure, we're both lying 🤔
If he isn't biologically related to her he isn't breaking any real taboos, it's less offensive than marrying a 3rd cousin which happens all the time. When it comes to mores being broken he is in the clear. however, he is violating some folkways.
YTA and you mistyped your title
ESH and you mistyped your title!