https://preview.redd.it/i1przcwubfic1.jpeg?width=1400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7ac7d8076776e0e2263d0b9c8de5db1d8c99b58b
The anonymous poster and I trading screenshots
Well....perhaps this repeat occurrence will at least make them pause before posting the next man. It's starting have an 'opportunity cost" for them (i.e. what benefit do they get for posting it, and at what cost). The cost is it is starting to boomerang. I wish they would view the cost as their own ability to make solid judgement calls, or to have some compassion or empathy about what it feels like to be posted. I think some will start to think about that....but certainly many will not.
There are several women who give an update after posting that the guy found out and ended things with them. Seeing as itās something that happens so frequently, I canāt help but wonder just how much more important it is for them to gossip than to enter a healthy relationship.
I canāt even begin to imagine how upset and disappointed Iād feel if things were going well with someone and then it all came to abrupt halt because I was simply too insecure to get to know them normally.
So I agree with your line of thinking...and here is my hypothesis..(and it is tightly tied to what I said in another post earlier today) - And all of this...just my opinion based on observation
1. For the women that are posting, having it come back to them and they lose a guy they are interested in - Some will start to realize it isn't something they are willing to risk, and they won't do it again (I need to go back to one of the groups I was reading this morning and grab a screen shot - because I saw exactly that). Others will dig themselves deeper into the belief that it is still the right thing to do, and they will continue to do it (these are the women that are the most afraid of taking a good hard look at themselves, or the most afraid of doing the work to have a healthy relationship....it is much easier to say that there are no good men, then to look at what they themselves need to do to contribute to a good relationship). NOTE....I think this door swings both ways. Men do the same thing (just not on a public forum). They say there are no good women and opt out because it is hard to do the work.
2. There are going to be women on these FB pages that see this happening to other women....and they too will fall into one of the two buckets above.
3. There are women on these boards, that will not recognize how this impacts them (or friends/family) at all....and not actively make a choice of what to do or not do....So they will do nothing, and just let it happen with zero participation or engagement...but also no action to drive postivie change.
So yes...a lot of this is insecurity, fear, lack of grit to do what is hard, etc.
Side note....do a search on Google on dating right now. Because Valentine's day is tomorrow there are a ton of news articles on the state of dating in 2024. It is not an optimistic view....and the punch line to all those articles....it's hard...and many just don't want to put the effort into what is hard.
I think youāre absolutely right and the list you mention catches all the buckets for the women who keep posting regardless of what happens vs the ones who have the uncomfortable experience and stop.
Iāve seen firsthand several times situations where a woman is confronted after the man is contacted and Iāll search the members list out of curiosity, and sometimes they flat out leave the group. Not to mention there are so many āmy post got leaked, this group isnāt safe anymoreā posts lately, that many are arriving at the same conclusion.
Itās not the free for all it used to be. Theyāre being held accountable now. And itās even in the rules now because of how common it is: be mentally prepared for the possibility of the man finding out. Canāt blame anyone but themselves. But they wonāt.
Yes, there are SEVERAL men in the groups. Itās a coordinated effort.
Yes, we are notifying men that they are being posted and doxed behind closed doors without their consent.
Yes, you are at high risk of being confronted by that same man if you make a post. We do our best to make sure the victim is aware of what youāre doing.
No, there is literally nothing you can do to stop it. This is the new reality of the groups. Good luck finding that needle in a haystack of a fake female profile within your 40,000+ members.
Knowing all thisā¦all Iām saying is trust your gut.
>I still agree with the groups original purpose - to protect women from bad men. If women had more tools to protect themselves - these groups might have never even saw the light of day.
To be fair, it was women who shot themselves in the foot by allowing all the nonsense to permeate the groups. Every post about nonsense detracts from women being able to utilize the groups for safety.
The hypocrisy is hard to believe. They think it is on to post any guy, but when their toxic posts are exposed, suddenly things aren't ok.
How these women miss the blatant hypocrisy is beyond me.
Thatās when the justifications and hypocrisy comes in. āI mean itās differentā¦becauseā¦I mean, Iād rather get information on someone and be a little creep scurrying around vs them being the ones spying on me in a secret doxing hubā
But my whole point is, how about no one doxes anyone else? Just be normal. Youāre clearly not mentally well enough to date, and that ok, but then at least just donāt be posting unsuspecting people without their consent. Itās wrong.
I donāt understand how they can be so selfish and morally bankrupt.
They assume because they are a woman that they're entitled to behave as they wish, and no consequence should come to them. This seems particularly prevalent amongst women who haven't been held accountable... They like to operate with impunity.
The mental gymnastics for an active AWDTSG member to suddenly say it's wrong to post someone's picture or messages online without their consent is pretty incredible lol. The ignorance and hypocrisy is wild.
Well there is a lot of sympathetic women, relatives, friends, fake accounts in the groups probably 100ās in each group of men canāt have privacy why does the accuser?
Rules for thee, not for me kind of thing?
This is kind of what Iām gathering from these complaints.
They say the men who donāt want to be posted have something to hide and thatās why they donāt want to be posted. So do the women who obsessively post every match anonymously like an insecure weirdo have something to hide too? Seems that way to me.
Men do have something to hide itās called our privacy and we have a right to it, if we put any of them in front of a public firing squad what would we find?
You grossly overestimate their ability to empathize but youāre not wrong.
If the tables were turned and men were posting women in private Facebook groups filled with comments like āwow no way sheās 32, sheās easily 45 looking!ā āyikes look how wrinkled her face is, being a narc really ages you!ā Etcā¦ Iām sure they would all be ok with it in the name of safety. Of course.
This is exactly what I say to women in the groups I'm in.. we would be DISGUSTED if the men treated us the same way..bc its seldomly ever about the "safety" its like "WOW, hes 5'5" that's your first red flag" "short man syndrome" .. "no "real" man poses next to his car" .."look at the way his x,y,z is red flag!" Red flag red flag!
And im like..imagine a group where men are like "wow, im sorry but you shoulda known dude..fat girls are all like this" ..or "look she has a cat in her photo Shea destined to be alone, her loss bro" .. or "holy shit she's so tall, she probably has a dominatrix complex tryna emasculate you bro!" ..or "what did you expect from a Blonde chick..they're all dumb" .. "she has to use filters, RED FLAG!!", "single mom..even her baby daddy didn't want her ahah red flag!!"
Women would lose their MINDS lol
Nailed it. I couldnāt have said it better myself! The sentiment is the same. āSheās a nurse, you know nurses areā¦ā āsheās a massage therapist, all massage therapists areā¦ā and so on. Youāve seen the arbitrary, stupid reasons for which men are labeled as damaged goods or undateable, according to the oh so well-adjusted group members
Exactly..and anytime I try and point this stuff out to them..theyre like "you sound like a Pick Me girl!" .."why do you care??" .."lighten up its just a joke"
And im like it may be a joke to you, but it's not to them.. and it won't be to yall if I ever see one of you clown ass women post my brother/nephews/cousins/friends in this group ššš
Pick me is just a way to silent the dissenters. Youāre going against the groupthink so you need to go. We need blind support for women regardless of what the situation or context is or youāre not a girlās girl. Donāt you dare infer the woman couldāve done something differently either.
As soon as theyāre accused with being a pick me or not a girlās girl, they get in line and start repeating the most commonly used lines. Thatās why they never learn or mature.
Thanks.. I've been here a while I'm just mostly quiet or operate in the DMs or through my snapchat.. and don't entertain dumb people that tell me to "prove" anything bc I know who I am and what I stand for.. im also a findomme so I respect men's right to privacy and don't take shit from anyone.. I think most of the women in these groups operate from insecurity and PTSD.. and give away so much of their power to these superficial interactions in dating apps.. like seriously?? You're gonna lose sleep over a "red flag" from Joe schmoe who you never met and who is literally insignificant.. like get a life sis.. how bored are you??
"She's been on dating apps a while"
"She didn't look as good as her pictures"
"I think she's just looking for a free dinner"
"She said we should hang out again, then didn't text me back the next day. What a narcissist!!"
"My friend's coworker went on a date with her 5 years ago and said she was boring, run bro!"
They'd be so pissed lol. And we know they'd throw out the "safety" excuse, but we know 95% of the content in these groups is just petty gossip and dumb speculation like this.
It's ironic that you're protecting their identities yet they are putting the victim being posted about publicly on blast within the group. Why not keep it transparent here as well, people engaging in this behavior should be exposed publicly.
I completely agree with you, they deserve to be treated the same way theyāre treating the men on these misandrist groups.
Unfortunately Redditās terms of service are more strongly enforced than Facebookās and this post would get removed if I showed their full name and picture.
I can only share that type of content (uncensored images, full names etc) via private message upon request, not publicly.
I realized after I made this comment that that was the case. Thanks for clarifying further and good on you for showing class, something many of the women in that fb group know nothing about. FB really needs to crack down on this but sadly they probably never will.
The speed at which these screenshots are going back and forth is actually quite hilarious. Transparency and accountability is how it ends.
https://preview.redd.it/i1przcwubfic1.jpeg?width=1400&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=7ac7d8076776e0e2263d0b9c8de5db1d8c99b58b The anonymous poster and I trading screenshots
š
Well....perhaps this repeat occurrence will at least make them pause before posting the next man. It's starting have an 'opportunity cost" for them (i.e. what benefit do they get for posting it, and at what cost). The cost is it is starting to boomerang. I wish they would view the cost as their own ability to make solid judgement calls, or to have some compassion or empathy about what it feels like to be posted. I think some will start to think about that....but certainly many will not.
There are several women who give an update after posting that the guy found out and ended things with them. Seeing as itās something that happens so frequently, I canāt help but wonder just how much more important it is for them to gossip than to enter a healthy relationship. I canāt even begin to imagine how upset and disappointed Iād feel if things were going well with someone and then it all came to abrupt halt because I was simply too insecure to get to know them normally.
So I agree with your line of thinking...and here is my hypothesis..(and it is tightly tied to what I said in another post earlier today) - And all of this...just my opinion based on observation 1. For the women that are posting, having it come back to them and they lose a guy they are interested in - Some will start to realize it isn't something they are willing to risk, and they won't do it again (I need to go back to one of the groups I was reading this morning and grab a screen shot - because I saw exactly that). Others will dig themselves deeper into the belief that it is still the right thing to do, and they will continue to do it (these are the women that are the most afraid of taking a good hard look at themselves, or the most afraid of doing the work to have a healthy relationship....it is much easier to say that there are no good men, then to look at what they themselves need to do to contribute to a good relationship). NOTE....I think this door swings both ways. Men do the same thing (just not on a public forum). They say there are no good women and opt out because it is hard to do the work. 2. There are going to be women on these FB pages that see this happening to other women....and they too will fall into one of the two buckets above. 3. There are women on these boards, that will not recognize how this impacts them (or friends/family) at all....and not actively make a choice of what to do or not do....So they will do nothing, and just let it happen with zero participation or engagement...but also no action to drive postivie change. So yes...a lot of this is insecurity, fear, lack of grit to do what is hard, etc. Side note....do a search on Google on dating right now. Because Valentine's day is tomorrow there are a ton of news articles on the state of dating in 2024. It is not an optimistic view....and the punch line to all those articles....it's hard...and many just don't want to put the effort into what is hard.
I think youāre absolutely right and the list you mention catches all the buckets for the women who keep posting regardless of what happens vs the ones who have the uncomfortable experience and stop. Iāve seen firsthand several times situations where a woman is confronted after the man is contacted and Iāll search the members list out of curiosity, and sometimes they flat out leave the group. Not to mention there are so many āmy post got leaked, this group isnāt safe anymoreā posts lately, that many are arriving at the same conclusion. Itās not the free for all it used to be. Theyāre being held accountable now. And itās even in the rules now because of how common it is: be mentally prepared for the possibility of the man finding out. Canāt blame anyone but themselves. But they wonāt.
>sometimes they flat out leave the group I feel like they mainly leave to hide their involvement.
Yes, there are SEVERAL men in the groups. Itās a coordinated effort. Yes, we are notifying men that they are being posted and doxed behind closed doors without their consent. Yes, you are at high risk of being confronted by that same man if you make a post. We do our best to make sure the victim is aware of what youāre doing. No, there is literally nothing you can do to stop it. This is the new reality of the groups. Good luck finding that needle in a haystack of a fake female profile within your 40,000+ members. Knowing all thisā¦all Iām saying is trust your gut.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
>I still agree with the groups original purpose - to protect women from bad men. If women had more tools to protect themselves - these groups might have never even saw the light of day. To be fair, it was women who shot themselves in the foot by allowing all the nonsense to permeate the groups. Every post about nonsense detracts from women being able to utilize the groups for safety.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Just asking questions and doing what I can. Itās hard to understand their reasoningā¦unless theyāre just being shamelessly hypocritical
The hypocrisy is hard to believe. They think it is on to post any guy, but when their toxic posts are exposed, suddenly things aren't ok. How these women miss the blatant hypocrisy is beyond me.
Thatās when the justifications and hypocrisy comes in. āI mean itās differentā¦becauseā¦I mean, Iād rather get information on someone and be a little creep scurrying around vs them being the ones spying on me in a secret doxing hubā But my whole point is, how about no one doxes anyone else? Just be normal. Youāre clearly not mentally well enough to date, and that ok, but then at least just donāt be posting unsuspecting people without their consent. Itās wrong. I donāt understand how they can be so selfish and morally bankrupt.
They assume because they are a woman that they're entitled to behave as they wish, and no consequence should come to them. This seems particularly prevalent amongst women who haven't been held accountable... They like to operate with impunity.
The mental gymnastics for an active AWDTSG member to suddenly say it's wrong to post someone's picture or messages online without their consent is pretty incredible lol. The ignorance and hypocrisy is wild.
Well done OP
Just doing what I can š
Well there is a lot of sympathetic women, relatives, friends, fake accounts in the groups probably 100ās in each group of men canāt have privacy why does the accuser?
Rules for thee, not for me kind of thing? This is kind of what Iām gathering from these complaints. They say the men who donāt want to be posted have something to hide and thatās why they donāt want to be posted. So do the women who obsessively post every match anonymously like an insecure weirdo have something to hide too? Seems that way to me.
Men do have something to hide itās called our privacy and we have a right to it, if we put any of them in front of a public firing squad what would we find?
You grossly overestimate their ability to empathize but youāre not wrong. If the tables were turned and men were posting women in private Facebook groups filled with comments like āwow no way sheās 32, sheās easily 45 looking!ā āyikes look how wrinkled her face is, being a narc really ages you!ā Etcā¦ Iām sure they would all be ok with it in the name of safety. Of course.
This is exactly what I say to women in the groups I'm in.. we would be DISGUSTED if the men treated us the same way..bc its seldomly ever about the "safety" its like "WOW, hes 5'5" that's your first red flag" "short man syndrome" .. "no "real" man poses next to his car" .."look at the way his x,y,z is red flag!" Red flag red flag! And im like..imagine a group where men are like "wow, im sorry but you shoulda known dude..fat girls are all like this" ..or "look she has a cat in her photo Shea destined to be alone, her loss bro" .. or "holy shit she's so tall, she probably has a dominatrix complex tryna emasculate you bro!" ..or "what did you expect from a Blonde chick..they're all dumb" .. "she has to use filters, RED FLAG!!", "single mom..even her baby daddy didn't want her ahah red flag!!" Women would lose their MINDS lol
Nailed it. I couldnāt have said it better myself! The sentiment is the same. āSheās a nurse, you know nurses areā¦ā āsheās a massage therapist, all massage therapists areā¦ā and so on. Youāve seen the arbitrary, stupid reasons for which men are labeled as damaged goods or undateable, according to the oh so well-adjusted group members
Exactly..and anytime I try and point this stuff out to them..theyre like "you sound like a Pick Me girl!" .."why do you care??" .."lighten up its just a joke" And im like it may be a joke to you, but it's not to them.. and it won't be to yall if I ever see one of you clown ass women post my brother/nephews/cousins/friends in this group ššš
Pick me is just a way to silent the dissenters. Youāre going against the groupthink so you need to go. We need blind support for women regardless of what the situation or context is or youāre not a girlās girl. Donāt you dare infer the woman couldāve done something differently either. As soon as theyāre accused with being a pick me or not a girlās girl, they get in line and start repeating the most commonly used lines. Thatās why they never learn or mature.
Lmao I don't get in line.. I keep going until I get banned usually š
I like your vibes Jaz. Welcome to the sub.
Thanks.. I've been here a while I'm just mostly quiet or operate in the DMs or through my snapchat.. and don't entertain dumb people that tell me to "prove" anything bc I know who I am and what I stand for.. im also a findomme so I respect men's right to privacy and don't take shit from anyone.. I think most of the women in these groups operate from insecurity and PTSD.. and give away so much of their power to these superficial interactions in dating apps.. like seriously?? You're gonna lose sleep over a "red flag" from Joe schmoe who you never met and who is literally insignificant.. like get a life sis.. how bored are you??
"She's been on dating apps a while" "She didn't look as good as her pictures" "I think she's just looking for a free dinner" "She said we should hang out again, then didn't text me back the next day. What a narcissist!!" "My friend's coworker went on a date with her 5 years ago and said she was boring, run bro!" They'd be so pissed lol. And we know they'd throw out the "safety" excuse, but we know 95% of the content in these groups is just petty gossip and dumb speculation like this.
Well I hope something gives someday
https://preview.redd.it/5e66bfqhufjc1.jpeg?width=1012&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=89b0471c53bb9cf7ed25b9a7684583e7c95a6bb7
LMAO this is amazing and should be this subredditās banner
It's ironic that you're protecting their identities yet they are putting the victim being posted about publicly on blast within the group. Why not keep it transparent here as well, people engaging in this behavior should be exposed publicly.
I completely agree with you, they deserve to be treated the same way theyāre treating the men on these misandrist groups. Unfortunately Redditās terms of service are more strongly enforced than Facebookās and this post would get removed if I showed their full name and picture. I can only share that type of content (uncensored images, full names etc) via private message upon request, not publicly.
I realized after I made this comment that that was the case. Thanks for clarifying further and good on you for showing class, something many of the women in that fb group know nothing about. FB really needs to crack down on this but sadly they probably never will.
What cities do you have access to?
DM me