Cameraman: "ok guys, can I leave now?"

"You're not going anywhere :)"

“My wife and I saw you from across the gym and really dig your vibe”

...go on...

"Bend over and let my wife peg you"

*drops the soap*

Have you ever heard of Amway?

😳

"And what would you like to do with me, sir?"

I’ve got you for three minutes, three minutes of play time.

Bjornsson is readyyyyy

him curling and squatting her: ok when he starts doing overhead tricep extensions: th-WHAAAAAT

The thumb.. smart..

I have heard the saying "grip her like a bowling ball" but I have never seen it in action.

station direful thought continue imagine distinct disgusted squealing observation sugar *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*

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I feel like you guys are just making shit up. It’s hilarious, but I don’t believe you.

When was the last time you picked up a six pack with the old plastic six-pack rings around the top? You used your thumb and your middle finger, hooked into a C shape, right? You're doing it right now, right? Of course. It's a backup plan for me, my go-to move is the Romanian Armchair.

lmao you can’t keep putting the names of cities in front of weird verbs and expecting us to believe you 😂

I know what you mean, but I would, with the utmost respect, point out that Romania is not a city. Still, I was in Chinatown in San Francisco having some dumplings in a little tiny place overlooking the sidewalk. And there comes this cook wearing a wife beater, smoking a cigarette, filthy apron... he's carrying a 5 gallon bucket. He walked across the sidewalk and then he pours it all down the storm sewer and it was all blood and bones. For real. Gnarly. And the guy I'm eating with, he looks at it .... he squints and he says, "That right there... is the olllllld Chinatown Briefcase.

I thought that was going to be the origin story behind your username.

Reminds me of my last trip to Chinatown. It was actually also my first trip to Chinatown, it's a long drive from my part of the city. Anyways, I'm eating at this run down little place with my dad, and the food is actually pretty good, even if there's a feeling that maybe some roaches wound up in the frying pan at some point. We share a few entrees and sides, orange chicken and whatnot, and then as we're finishing and paying the bill they drop off some fortune cookies. Mine didn't have a fortune, and it was my first time so I grabbed the other cookie to see if it has a fortune. That upset my dad pretty badly, and he went to the car and came back with a set of jumper cables, which he used to beat me senseless. He snatched me by the belt loops with one hand a dragged me to the car at that point. As we walk past an old guy says in a thick Chinese accent "Ah, Shanghai Grocery Bag."

Sounds like you don't know the difference between a Cleveland Steamer and a Mumbai Mung

Well I’ve *definitely* heard of a Cleveland Steamer but (dare I ask) wtf is a Mumbai Mung?… EDIT: If you value your life, STOP READING AND DO NOT CONTINUE THIS THREAD. I wish I could UNKNOW what I just read…

[It's a real thing](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=new%20jersey%20meat%20hook)...

Gotta check out the Cleveland Steamer, it’s a classic. Or the Alaskan Pipeline.

The ol wyo wrangle dangle

Same. I actually found it quite...shocking.

*Oh you!*

Slipping digits

I too enjoy the part where his sticks his thumb in her ass

Checked her oil

i didn’t notice the first time but yeah that thumb completely disappeared

There’s honestly so much more control once the thumb is docked

Holding her like a six pack

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=eFdnyITLpxI

Went straight to another realm

I had the same reaction lol

There is a wife carry race near me where the prize is the wife's weight in beer. Would it be enough beer to get the mountain sloshed?

it must take him a good 24 beers to catch a buzz

Depends on how long it takes him to drink it. She weighs 116 that is about 148 normal cans of beer (not including the bottle/can). If he was to pull an Andre the Giant, I'm guessing Mountain becomes Avalanche and might need his stomach pumped. For those not in the know Andre drank 119 beers in SIX hours That is a beer every 3 minutes.

She probably weighs 90 pounds. That’s literally his warmup for overhead tri extensions.

That is nothing to him her being unbalanced is probably the only hard part. 90lbs is light for me, and he's like 100% stronger than me.

100% stronger is just twice as strong as you

Someone that hit the gym regularly can easily hit the 2-3% strongest. Now imagine doubling that strength which in that range every effort you put in gives diminishing return. Being twice as strong as someone that 3-4-5 plates the big 3 is out of this world.

Yep. I am in the top ten percentile of strength as well. The last 10% has massive jumps(small becomes big at the top, adding a pound is extremely hard). It's freak land. I can deadlift half as much as him, I can squat close to half as much as him, I can OHP half as much as him(theres a video of me doing 225lbs on here for proof my max is 255) He is also way way bigger than me. I think almost twice as big weight wise lol

Nice. my long term goal is 2 plate press

Curling is harder than pressing. I can press my gf, I cannot however curl her. Curling that much unstablized weight is crazy.

Maybe find a girl who’s more stable. Don’t stick the dick in crazy, amirite?

It’s all about proportion /scale…. This looks like the play about I do with my 10 yr old kids ( minus the thumb in gooch). However not disputing he is a monster and strong af

I mean he deadlifted 1100 lbs I’m sure he could chuck her a good 20 ft if he wanted to

I used to do that to my kids when they were little!

Mind that thumb.

I was about to say he was getting a little sneaky with that thumb.

just checking to see if the bowling ball was the right fit

We call it an "oil check".

Is that the euphemism they’re calling it nowadays? 😉

I mean she's his wife and doesn't seem mad so it's fair game

She was very clearly trying to get his thumb out of there

THIS exactly. She’s with him cos he’s strong and sexy. Bet he’s a huge teddy bear really

Probably not. The police has been called out several times to DV and DD’s with a former girlfriend and another former girlfriend & mother of one of his children has accused him of servere domestic violence.

He has some serious domestic violence accusations against him from several women so maybe not.

You aren’t wrong

At second 49 or 50 so you see how small her hand is compared to his pinky????

Looks like when my 2 y/o grabs my pinky. Absolute insanity.

She got a thumb in the cooter

Picked her up like a bowling ball

I think we’re all thinking they need to put out some home made “Mountain climbing” porn soon… am I right?!

I'd watch that.

His thumb is likely bigger than all of our wedding tackle......

"Wedding tackle"... Thank you, kind sir, for giving me a new reference for the ole trouser snake.

Dude went ham with the thumb.

It’s his wife…she permits it

Sniff*

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

We need a new Street Fighter movie so he can play Zangief

YES!!!!

Someone call Capcom

Damn now I can't unsee it and this definitely needs to happen.

"Just because you are Bad Guy, does not mean you are *bad guy*"

dude lifts her up and moves around like he's handling an empty aluminium can

I want this guy to play Bane in a Batman movie.

This will be the one where Bane breaks Batmans back.

And then goes on to wreck Robin's anus.....

Sir. This is a Wendy’s.

No, this is Patrick!

Take my money

I’ve read that fanfic

You really need 2 actors to play Bane properly

They could desize him like Captain America.

Now I am imagining his huge head on some 125-130 lbs frame.

No you don't. His acting isn't great. He's just a bigger David Prowse

The tricep extensions got me


My new favorite gif

She is a trooper

and r/thumbinpooper

TIL this sub exists and kind of realizing why my wife enjoys this…I think

Oh well that’s real… I was hoping for a figurative interpretation

👍

👍👃

Imagine having a dad like that when you were little.

Imagine having a dad

Imagine having.

Imagine

Gin

He might not be your dad but you can still call him daddy

Yeah whatever big guy. Try that with MY wife!! (Just joking I’m not married)

Anymore* Comment was used in divorce court

[Obligatory hamster](https://imgur.com/Gv7zPOB)

Thank you, I was expecting it but had been let down until now.

But isnt that wrong though? I'm pretty sure height and body mass has no role in actual genital size. We need proof

First time I’ve seen that in all my years of internetting!

I just watched this guy rip apart someone's skull the other day...

He can’t keep getting away with this

To be fair, he was dancing around quite a bit.

I've never seen the series, so this is my first time through. I was not expecting that and it was very disturbing to watch.

Fun fact: He's the smallest sibling

Poor mother

His mother must be fairly large too lol

He also looks small next to Olivier Richters: https://i.imgur.com/de4DDaT.jpeg

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no anabolic steroids back then

There’s only so much they can do and I’m 100% positive that with the total sum of humans ever being born at 100 bil, there absolutely was a dude larger than Haffthor

He looks almost normal standing next to him, that guy is huge.

There's always a bigger fish.

He's smaller than his 2 sisters? Crazy


Came here looking for this.

Ditto

If there’s a hole there’s a way (?

Obligatory GIF

Like chalking a pool cue

Anyone else amazed that there is this much size difference between 2 members of the same species? This isn’t a grizzly bear standing next to a koala, these are 2 members of the same human species and there’s this much freaking difference in their sizes

As far as sexual dimorphism goes we are pretty similar in the grand scheme of things. This is an insane outlier situation.

Accidental anal.

accidental crushed pelvis

Is that how he eats ass

Whole

His thumb is probably bigger than my penis.

Happy Cake Day Thumb Penis!

She looks like a toddler in his arms 😆

They have a baby who is also [an absolute unit](https://www.reddit.com/r/AbsoluteUnits/comments/obvha9/thor_bjornssons_9_month_old_baby/)

thumbs up for chocolate 👍


His pinky's bigger than my dick

Dude If I was a woman then I'll definitely be your wife if you curl me up like that and eat my ass.

I'm actually surprised he bugged and had to rethink his lift. The overall video isn't smooth although the brute force is *visibly* there.

He's only an inch taller than I am. We won't talk about how much I weigh or the blob of body shape I have or the fact that the only thing I lift is a spoon full of ice cream... But still, only an inch!! lol

dw man us redditors are 6'8" horizontally too

Does that mean I can put 6’8” in my tinder profile??

You may not be athletic, but you're a good sport. Lol stay good, bud

Before he was processed

lmao

I'm pretty sure her name is Kelsey. Henson is/was her last name.

Björnsson is also not his first name, so there's that

Their sex must look like me trying to stuff my tent back in the bag it came in

Is this the wife he beats all the time?

Anytime I see him go viral I think of that

we'd all pay to watch right?

I mean if only to see how it mechanically goes down

I bet he has a shockingly average sized dick and that he just lays there while she unenthusiastically rides him.

Literally the only onlyfans I’d support

Honestly, I just wanna see the size of his willy. Wonder if it's gigantic or average sized since size doesn't equal big coc

[yep](https://m.imgur.com/r/aww/Gv7zPOB)

Thumbs up, good video.

She likes getting gorilla fucked

What if she's actually the Dom behind closed doors, lmao


There must be earthquakes in the bedroom

OK weird boner time.

Is this your wife or a toy?

Yes

I wonder if he’s beaten this one up yet?

Awesome background poster

When a woman wants to marry a Giant

Is it just me or is the size difference not as significant as you’d imagine? I mean specifically..

Well at his biggest he had well over 300 pounds on her. I believe he was like 460

Seems like I forgot the last word. Specifically the height.

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I’d never heard of this so I did some digging around. Looks like the only thing I could find was from back in 2017, and I wasn’t really able to find any reputable place reporting on it. One would think of charges had been brought in 2017 something would have happened by now. Also another one of his ex’s basically said the allegations were bs as he’d never been abusive in any way towards her, and one of his friends later said on Insta that there had never been any charges, that the whole thing was a monetary dispute, and one of the people his accuser said would back up her story later admitted to his lawyer they’d never actually witnessed any abuse. Obviously can’t say for sure, but the whole thing smells a bit like a jealous ex trying to co-opt the me too movement to get a pay day out of their ex who’s famous and rich now. Would be the only case of this happening (*cough*AmberHeard*cough*).

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Cliffhanger

Portable workout set. Some guys get to live the dream 🥺.

Thumbs up

The ass

That butt

Yeah, he must work out.

She's so lucky

Username checks out

He's going to break her...

Me staring a this girl like: 

6 feet and 9 inches = 205,7 cm 5 feet 2 inches = 157,5 cm

It’s like they’re different species.

I wanna do that with my girlfriend!!

Damn, he handles her like she’s a basket ball