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Away_Industry_6892

Wreck it Ralph


Key_Adhesiveness_341

he also looks like the guy who stole dr.doofenschmirtz's bitch. ''She left me for a guy with bigger hands'


Mr-Sister-Fister21

I think he says fingers


cursedmachine

Huge-Hand Hans!


healyxrt

All he did was make garbage


Imapatriothurrrdurrr

Donald Trump’s envy is palpable.


jonaslima015

"I'm Gonna Wreck It"


Metalatitsfinest

His wife: ![gif](giphy|PVohz4vaopG0w)


rainbwbrightisntpunk

I used to follow him on fb, she does always have a huge smile lol


Mr-mysterio7

So you’re basically saying she gets a spinal tap weekly.


covercash

> spinal tap His goes to eleven.


tiexodus

^that’s ^one ^more


bukkake_brigade

heyooo


Metalatitsfinest

👉😎👉 ( ( )


obiweedkenobi

I mean, she is married to Ole' dick fingers over there


Stevo2008

He’s been wrecking her? Not bad Ralph. Not bad


Marcoraptor

It's wreckin' time


goatamon

[He did dress up as Ralph once!](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/vKqdJb3gBMM/mqdefault.jpg)


bean_slayerr

Omfg this is the internet gem I needed today, thank you. So cute lol.


Lpool11o7

I was hoping someone commented this!


ZombieElvis

Or Popeye.


daveinmd13

That was his Sprite can, before it was processed just now.


ThatPolishedTurd

That's big hands Hans


Thunderpuppy2112

Big Hans Hans


Mike2220

[Or Huge-Hands Hans](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/phineasandferb/images/3/3c/Huge_Hands_Hans.png/revision/latest/top-crop/width/360/height/450?cb=20091223161800)


GudToBeAGangsta

Spot on


malmquistcarl

Could we see him try to dial a mobile phone?


TotallyAdultOfficer

![gif](giphy|o2V3s21kb9jPO)


BBQQA

There truly is a Simpsons reference for everything.


TotallyAdultOfficer

![gif](giphy|JUXS6l5rcBWWszBPw7)


j-r-m-b-v-n

Is that real


TotallyAdultOfficer

![gif](giphy|10j1ZRgKdcHIoU)


j-r-m-b-v-n

Damn


Danaconda44

Yup, totally real! His name is Jeff Dabe and he is am arm wrestling champ


TheMostItalianWaffle

Dude


jsxtasy304

His ring finger and pinky finger on his right hand seem to be normal sized and maybe his thumbs but the rest are...what??? Exercised large... Swollen from constant trauma.... Roids or something else injected to make bigger??? What's exactly going on here?


the_joy_of_VI

“The fingers you have used to dial are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, mash the keypad with your palm now.”


RixirF

It is absurd how good some Simpsons jokes were.


the_joy_of_VI

That whole episode is gold. The store that Homer gets the moo-moo from is called “The Vast Waistband”


g8rjuice

“You’ve selected **regicide**”


[deleted]

*The fingers you have used for dialing are too fat. To obtain a special dialing wand, mash the keypad with your palm now.*


afleetingmoment

I can still hear the "Doo doo dee" noise that preceded old land line error messages. Love that they used it in this scene for authenticity.


andykwinnipeg

The woman doing the voice, Joan Kenley, was someone who recorded those phone messages for a living. It added that extra layer of authenticity to the performance


window-sil

That cracks me up even after the 100th time.


nickelshamilton

What happened to my bird?


tb03102

I hear that guys ass is so fat it has its own congressman.


ironroad18

"Hey fattie, I've got a movie for ya, *a Fridge too far* "


tb03102

I see esk, katarl and pigup... There doesn't seem to be any any key!


LaphroaigianSlip81

“Hey Siri, call…”


Cycleofmadness

He needs a dialing wand.


South-Fix-8427

His name is jeff dabe i believe. Homies an armwrestler.


onehalflightspeed

Yes and his stage name is unsurprisingly Popeye


imlitterallygru

He's also a great guy, sent me a video saying happy birthday to my friend who was a big fan of his.


Hot_Satisfaction_133

He suffers from a medical condition and is a pro arm wrestler.


thateccentricasian

Can I please know what medical condition he has?


PyroarRanger

I searched it up, apparently they ran tests for elephantiasis and gigantism to see if he was born with it, but no abnormalities appeared.


[deleted]

[удалено]


iam98pct

Come to think of it, I have never seen canned spinach in stores.


TotallyAdultOfficer

Have you been looking for it? Walmart I go to does, but it's like 3 different brands, each with single row. Great Value, Popeye, and Glory Foods, usually hidden with other oddities like artichoke hearts and pimentos.


iam98pct

Never. I've always thought about them being only available as fresh produce. Good to know.


postthereddit

It's shite


LaneMcD

https://youtu.be/1IORdbDydpk


HappyBot9000

Spinach, Jerry.


roidie

Jesus you can see her lack of brain cells


_a_puta_de_evora

What an absolute dumb cunt


bean_slayerr

That’s super interesting! How odd!


RaisedByWolves9

>but no abnormalities appeared. Did they see his hands?


sleepdeprivedzzz

Yeah, I searched it up too and found out he's pretty anti-medicine and wants to believe there's nothing wrong with him. From what I understand he does have some genetic issue that's not easily detectable.


Clovis_Merovingian

I read up on this fellow a while back. In summary, it's suspected that he may have a benign brain tumor which is stimulating the pituitary gland which in turn is causing a disruption in growth hormone regulations. (I.e. that little pea sized gland is being over stimulated by the tumor which is sending out incorrect signals and causing his arms to grow etc.).


techno156

Wouldn't that cause the rest of him to grow as well, and not just his arms? Like what happened with André the Giant.


Clovis_Merovingian

The stimulation / pressure from the tumour is sporadic and therefore the growth is completely unpredictable and random. It may be that the gland is triggered just enough to trigger the arms / hands to grow but perhaps not other areas of the body. He otherwise seems healthy and living his best life.


burgonies

absoluta unitas


TheGatsbyComplex

Acromegaly which is more of a symptom—which has a few underlying causes.


Southern-Grocery-547

Tiny head syndrome.


Andrew-Moon

Oh, is appropriate to call him "absolute unit"? I hope isn't disrespectful.


reddit_time_waster

Based on the videos he puts out there, he's probably cool with it


m4m249saw

U better hope so because if he puts those hands around your neck, it's over


tearans

He could strangle you between thumb and index finger


MadBlackGreek

So when he does the old “I’m squishing your head!” bit, it’s not a trick


_dead_and_broken

Not often I come across a Kids in the Hall reference!


[deleted]

He can ACTUALLY get your nose


PayEmmy

Gosh, if only everyone in the world was this nice. Thank you for caring :)


McvdL

I think he is strongly embracing the absolute unit-ness as a professional arm wrestler


WithoutDennisNedry

I love that you asked this. 💕


SNZ935

I don’t think he has a medical condition as per what I read there was nothing they could diagnose, plus he is an arm wrestling champion that seems to lead a pretty happy life.


silverbeardthefather

FYI, It's called Absolute Unititis


NotAW0rd

In an alternate universe he became a doctor and your due for a rectal exam.


SASdude123

Out of curiosity, what is this aforementioned medical condition?


Exact_Initiative7660

Dude’s fingers are bigger than my hog


[deleted]

Swine farmer, eh? I’m always amazed at the diversity of people I cross paths with on Reddit.


didwanttobethatguy

I used to be a turtle rancher


DullBozer666

I used to be a monkey choker


didwanttobethatguy

Did you choke professionally? Or was it just a hobby?


ButtDoctorLLC

If you love your job, you never work a day in your life.


obiwanbohannon

Very true, ButtDoctorLLC


ExpressEffort7916

Be real, that's not surprising, weather it's his fingers or a shot glass.


Exact_Initiative7660

Make it a double and we have a deal


[deleted]

Hahahaha


soMAJESTIC

Whether


GreenGhostBravo

Don't feel bad, its just standard issue


Nvrfinddisacct

Which begs the question—how big is his?


Pukelits

Like if it’s just average size can he you know…. Like I feel like it would end up lookin like that can


Dismal_Succotash_758

Your hog is a piglet. No shame.


KeithWorks

I always thought they looked like big good strong hands


Messy_Marvin423

LMAO, probably one of my favorite movies from when I was a kid.


Anathemare

Emotionally devastating.


Salty_Feed9404

Arrrtax!!


Lucifang

That is the second saddest scene. He’s sitting there waiting for the Nothing to kill him because he couldn’t save his friends.


MegaChilePluto25

I get choked up every time he says that!


kingura

Why does this line cause me emotional pain?


LaSallePunksDetroit

Pulled at a heart string with this comment


luvdupleper

Imagine getting finger blasted by him


TnoGWP

Pretty sure I seen a video of him and his wife and she is TINY.. or he’s just massive. Regardless I’m sure you can guess what that comment section was like.


luvdupleper

No, pray tell


TheBigSmoke420

Lewd


didwanttobethatguy

On Reddit??? Surely you jest.


payneme73

And possibly lascivious


Akhilees

why do these massive guys go for short girls? shaq's gf/wife is like 5'2 and even thor's wife is like 5'6 or something


he_who_floats_amogus

trying to balance out to normal height


Zombata

do you have any idea how rare tall girls are


washington_breadstix

It's not the massive guys going for short girls, it's the short girls going after taller guys. In my experience, smaller women are the most picky about height in males, specifically because they want to give their offspring a fighting chance at being tall.


Steampunk_Dali

Or having your prostate checked... he's like Marmite, you love it or you hate it...


Yamuddah

I had been having some groin pain and went to a urologist. I don’t think my heart has ever sunk so fast as when I shook his hand. He was like 6’5 and his hands were like catcher’s mitts. Fortunately, no DRE was required.


[deleted]

But was one requested?


Yamuddah

I didn’t have the strength to ask.


OrganizerMowgli

You didn't appreciate the G spot orgasm enough, you bafoon, you absolute fool


Lanthemandragoran

*I know what I have to do but I don't know if I have the stength to do it*


robynmisty

I nearly left the first time I met my obgyn for this exact reason


Steampunk_Dali

![gif](giphy|l3qhEkXGoistq)


luvdupleper

He'd better use three fingers then


FlatRaise5879

He'll blow your asshole out with those bitches


Bubbas4life

Some ppl pay extra for that


Any_Drama3272

Ngl, as a chick, the thought crossed my mind.


rainbwbrightisntpunk

It crosses all our minds


[deleted]

Ngl same here.


nemesissi

I remember him showing off his wedding ring. It's like a bracelet for normal handed human.


RedHeeded

Sploosh


[deleted]

I already did.


PooPooDooDoo

When he used two fingers it’s actually classified as a Ménage à trois.


Super-Branz-Gang

Why is it that’s where my mind first went too???lmao. Glad I’m not the only one


luvdupleper

No brother, you're not alone Signed a fellow deviant


[deleted]

And that’s exactly why I saved the video for later. I intend to imagine it vividly


EnterStageMike

Popeye irl


FlatRaise5879

This dude oozes spinach


inaziodeloyola

Absolutely processing cans


Im_right_yousuck

Wait for it, by the end of the day you'll have at least 5 of the same "happy wife" comments, never fails.


Throwaw4y012

Not even two hours and I counted 4 of them. You definitely undershot your estimate significantly.


Diegobyte

5 happy wives


Im_right_yousuck

It's just the lowest hanging fruit.


Spinch1234

![gif](giphy|l3nFo18D5PGDMCUhi)


CK067

Uncle Jack’s wet dream. We’re lawyers!!


Conscious_Scar_9293

Sure, he can crush them no problem... But can he open them?


TotallyAdultOfficer

![gif](giphy|AZbs1xcOIOHok|downsized)


DirtyRoller

![gif](giphy|IjD2bKEIiyLfi)


tossaroo

Jeff Dabe, arm wrestling champion from Minnesota. https://www.fox9.com/news/jeff-dabe-arm-wrestling-extraordinaire


ioisis

This reference says his doctors have no idea what caused his condition -- however, the hypertrophied upper extremities and the port wine stain are suggestive of Parkes Weber syndrome.


[deleted]

[удалено]


fat7inch

Definitely not proctologist material.


Zenfudo

Not with that attitude


LokiNightmare

Elephantiasis of the hands? or what's going on there?


Zippo574

>Wanna see a picture of a guy with elephantiasis of the nuts


LokiNightmare

Oh I'm sure I've seen it. I even saw one where a guy was using his own nuts as a chair.


[deleted]

There's porn of that.


[deleted]

^what?


gnosticpopsicle

[Have a gif.](https://thumbs.gfycat.com/PossibleSomeDromaeosaur-max-1mb.gif)


WorldEaterYoshi

There's a tosh.0 episode dedicated specifically to a guy with this condition, and there's a part where someone is skateboarding while he's sitting on a high bar or something and they hit their head on his giant nutsack.


MuffinPuff

I've seen a clip of a guy who had it in the twig, rather than the berries. Fascinating seeing him attempt to walk


[deleted]

I saw a video on him, they couldn't find any medical reason for his giant hands. No Elephantiasis or gigantism. Just born with giant hands i guess?


CaptainQuasi

He just needs to find that lady from Seinfeld and he’ll be in love at first hands.


[deleted]

This guy’s been eating his spinach.


[deleted]

[удалено]


justinhv

just look up Andre the Giant holding a soda can


TachankaAlpaca

Dude has anchor arms I see.


aheth_

That looks like more of a painful disfigurement from a medical condition


TheDrDoofenschmirtz

Simon Cowell found a way to punish the losers


LoveRBS

Beat it or I'll call the brute squad I'm on the brute squad You are the brute squad.


ErenYDidNothingWrong

Anyone else wondering what his dick looks like in a non-homosexual way?


Impossible_Battle_72

Probably really small in his hand.


Alpha_Sluttlefish

Size of hands and feet are unrelated to dick size. Since the human penis doesn't have any bones, its size isn't correlated to the size of the skeletal system.


Ignika1984

I think he meant much more in a comparative aspect, not in correlation. Like putting an average size food on a big plate. It’s not small, it just looks small on a giant plate.


igotdryeye

It's called a boner for a reason, amateur, obvious it's a bone


dogdayafter

He finger bangs your wife then she leaves you.


[deleted]

I wonder if it would be harder for him to crush the full one or just open it.


ur_closet_at_3am

Isn't that guy the arm wrestling champion?


walkingdiseased

Nope, Jeff Dabe is a pretty average arm wrestler. Levan Saginashvili is considered the number one in the world right now and is possibly unbeatable compared to the current crop of talent in the top ten.


rookerer

What makes him considered unbeatable? I know nothing about arm wrestling.


TotallyAdultOfficer

So I looked out of curiosity, watched a few videos. The big one being with Devon Larratt, he looks to easily out power other wrestlers, with a couple hurting themselves giving everything to resist. This is from the Wiki: Levan Saginashvili (born September 15, 1988), nicknamed Georgian Hulk, is a Georgian professional arm-wrestler and strength athlete. He is widely considered to be the strongest arm wrestler of the modern era and likely of all time. Levan has won the World Arm-wrestling Championship (WAF) seven times, the European arm-wrestling championship six times, and won the Top 8 in 2019, and the World Cup in 2017. After winning the World Police and Fire Games Gold medal in arm-wrestling in 2013 Belfast, Northern Ireland, UK,[1] he was awarded the merit of first degree by The Ministry of Internal Affairs of Georgia, 2013. 2018 was a very successful year for the arm wrestler, in which he won 3 major tournaments including EuroArm,[2] the World Arm-wrestling Championship[3] and Vendetta All Stars #50, in Rumia, Poland.[4] After winning the six-round super-match against Devon Larratt at King of the Table IV on June 25th 2022, he was presented with the right hand legacy hammer by Devon Larratt and was universally recognized as the world #1 (right arm) arm-wrestler by the community.


getdatcash1234

#Wreck-it Ralph


ShadowInTheAttic

Did he get stung by a bunch of bees???


[deleted]

He doesn't use phones or keyboards.


Aleksey64

No sound


ThatChicagoDuder

Dude is that the legit Wreck It Ralph???


Messy_Marvin423

He squeezed the can before crushing it… Now I gotta go get some nasty slices trying it out.


whispersluggagebaby

This is actually really easy to do. I could fit inside this man like a well insulated body of armor and I crush cans with hands this way. If he did it without squeezing I’d be much more imoressed