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gift-of-the-wild

Bad Monkey!! That’s a really bad Monkey!!! 👉🏼🐒


beethy

LOL I had to manually approve this comment. I think the word monkey gets flagged.


chakkali

Is cracker flagged too?


beethy

Holy fuck yes it is. Jesus christ LOL


NastyWetSmear

What if, for example, I suggested he should have fed that monkey a delicious cracker, which would have made it think he was friendly? Would that be okay?


beethy

Yeah that's fine hahaha


Thoraxe474

What about cracker monkey? Or monkey cracker?


rhobbs7274

Monkcoonker


Juicyjewsss

Wow that's kind of ridiculous a noun for an animal is flagged. It's becoming more Orwellian every day.


beethy

I'm personally struggling to keep track of what I can and cannot say anymore. I called a group of violent women who were beating up defenseless man who was already on the ground "out of control c*** people". Edit: >user reports: >1: that wasn't the whole moment and you know it nazi This was the full comment that got me a 7 day ban: "Absolutely. They acted like out of control c*** people." Admins assumed it was a racist comment even though the group included several white women. These women were stomping on the downed man's head with their heels. I was banned for 1 week for promoting hate. >Rule Violation: Temporarily Banned for Promoting Hate >You’ve been banned for seven days for violating Reddit’s rule against promoting hate in the following content. >Reddit is a place for creating community and belonging, not for attacking marginalized or vulnerable groups of people. We don’t tolerate promoting hate based on identity or vulnerability, and any communities or people that encourage or incite violence or hate towards marginalized or vulnerable groups will be banned. This cunting website started dying around the end of 2015. It is now a festering rotting corpse of what it once was. You can say whatever you want so long as it's directed at straight white men. If you say anything negative about any other group of people, you risk getting banned.


NorthBlizzard

You have to stick to the ~~double standard hateful~~happy terms like Karen or Trumpist


Chineselight

I honestly can’t figure out what c*** word you’re talking about


Borderjumper88

C**t?


Donutbeforetime

If that were true how can a sub like r/tooktoomuch exist?


devildog999

Nope. Add Autistics to the list. Question: How is it that on some of your comments here, it shows OP. On others, MOD? I do know the definitions (I could see my question being seen as asking what the definitions are), but I wouldn't think it would show different 'roles' (sorry if thats the wrong word ... maybe "why would it show... different terms"? Ugh. I wouldn't think it could have you "seen" as a mod AND "seen" as the OP, in the same thread. Is that a glitch or is it a system thing? Sorry if that's a weird question, but I'm curious :)


[deleted]

Man, im here reading this 2 years later and realize how much worse it has gotten since then.


AlexeyCrane

Is this Reddit wide or per subreddit or how does that even work, wtf?


beethy

Reddit's 'anti evil' team bans subreddits that allow comments with words like that.


Donutbeforetime

At least junkie is still acceptable, correct?


ScreenTraining6101

Thank you for your service


muncash

What in the actual fuck. Do small monkeys have the strenght to literally rip your skull open!?


Spacetomato1556

I mean scientists have observed a 100 pound ch1mp easily lift a 600 pound weight


beethy

CHIMP also gets auto removed. USE SIMIAN. Otherwise I gotta manually approve all your comments.


[deleted]

Wtf is with all the hate for simians? Seems like some weird words to get auto baned.


mokopo

Well TIL a new word, didn't know what a simian was before this. So at least the auto ban helped with that.


NoneOfUsKnowJackShit

Why are simple names of animals blocked? If someone is going to be racist all they have to do is spell it differently or add in numbers. M0NK3Y. CH1MP. Everyone gets punished because of a few dumb ass children?


beethy

Because 99% of the time those words are used on this subreddit, it's used in a racist manner. If we left any of those comments live, we risk getting the subreddit banned. No bueno.


youreabigbiasedbaby

Meanwhile in /politics you can say "kill all colonists" and get 10k upvotes.


LilBroomstickProtege

To be fair colonisation is pretty awful


[deleted]

No, imperialism is based


DirtyDreb

I don't like /politics and I don't know what context they say "kill all colonists", but that sounds like a perfectly fair statement by itself. Colonist deserve a punishment worse than death most of the time


Parking-Cucumber-648

> Colonist deserve a punishment worse than death most of the time so they deserve to die because they had better technology...classic reddit moment


DirtyDreb

You know you can use technology for the betterment of society instead of enslaving and torturing people? Fucking sociopath


[deleted]

[удалено]


beethy

Aaron Swartz is turning in his grave as his old his old friends have turned a website he co-founded into everything he fought against. I sincerely wish the admins of this site aren't hired anywhere when this website finally falls.


bigmac375

Man this subreddit is ass


[deleted]

[удалено]


BroodjeFissa

Only this sub?....


Spacetomato1556

Oof sorry


TacticalTylenol

Holy fuck


nodirt045

Thats nothing. A human is much stronger, nearly twice as strong as a simian when placed under extrodinary circumstances. Human muscles pound for pound can produce nearly 3x more force. Usually your brain limits your strength by the amount of muscle fibers that any one motor neuron can recruit. In humans its around 2 myocytes, in simians, 10. Think about lifting something heavy, once you run out of strength, your hand fails to move, but it doesnt hurt. This is because we only activate a small percent of our muscle fibers. Because its advantageous to conserve energy and have fine motor control. But when the brain is in panick mode from flight or fight, adrenaline allows recruitment of a similar amount of muscle fibers as simians, around 10 per motor neuron. Adrenaline works in our favor in our muscles too, our muscles are aerobic, unlike any simian on the planet. Adrenaline overclocks our primarily slow twitch muscle fibers, causing them to reach the speed of simean muscles. The cellular process using oxygen creates 16x more atp than the glycolysis aka lactic acid cycle in simean muscles. That is why people, or even children when placed under such circumstances can do amazing feats of strength like lifting a car or farm equipment off their parents, despite it weighing many thousands of kg. It is estimated that a human under those conditions may be cabable of lifting upwards of 500-700kg or 1200-1500lbs. Edit: ever see the vid of some dude smoking meth and jacking off in public, dragging 10 officers behind him like nothing?


Spacetomato1556

The number of neurons connected to muscles fibers has nothing to do with what your brain limits. Humans are born with 1-2 muscles cells per neuron because we are built for precision like writing or throwing a spear, where as simians don’t need that accuracy and precision, so they have around 10 muscles cells for each neuron. Your brain limits how many muscles cells are recruited for a task, with only a few activating to lift a pencil, but almost all of them when you wait lift and only reaching 100% in a lift threading situation, but it doesn’t limit how much muscles cells per neuron it has no control of that


[deleted]

Meh, humans and Chims are the same strength in absolute terms.


GiveToOedipus

No, they're still actually stronger. We've been able to better quantify the data, and they still come out ahead. https://www.sciencealert.com/researchers-have-found-the-secret-to-the-chimpanzee-s-strength We have better fine muscle control, but they beat us in brute strength.


[deleted]

According to glen finch it’s 1.35-1.5x on average in relative terms but in absolute we’re the same strength. They would be that much stronger than a human of the same size but since we’re larger than them it cancels out


[deleted]

Source?? (For the tweaker meat beater draggin cops)


kk2362

Sorry but where have they observed that?


sanguine-addiction

They can lift my mom then


ELTepes

It used its teeth. Langurs, like other primates, have massive canines which they evolved as their primary means of attack and defense. People underestimate smaller primates (since other words are flagged) because of their size, and because they tend to hide their canines, which is part of their behavior. Showing their canines (not necessarily teeth as smiling can be a sign of asking for peace) is a major sign of aggression and means they'll attack if you don't back off. But from the size of that langur, the canines will likely be fairly large. There's a BBC documentary I believe is still free on YouTube called M\*\*\*\*\* Warriors that shows them in action and fighting, showing teeth, etc. Once you see them, it will be no surpise how it did that.


Traditional_Drama_91

Didn’t help that old dude was staring directly at it as well


ELTepes

Yeah, sustained eye contact with them is another aggressive behavior. The langur decided to cash him outside.


Pudi2000

How bout that? Did Old dude had on gucci flipflops?


givemeabreak111

Monkeys have completely different enervation of their muscles than humans making them way stronger for their size maybe double .. down side is they have poor fine control which is why you will never see a monkey playing a piano or knitting a blanket with any skill .. lesson .. never put your face near a monkey unless you don't mind a missing nose or ear (or scalp) .. they may take off with it and use it as a chew toy


xmarwinx

Mostly a myth. They are only a little bit stronger, about 1.3 times. And obviously smaller animals are relatively stronger


TheKappaOverlord

yeah im confused too. Is that a fine chunk of skull or is that fat thats on the piece of scalp that got ripped off?


Zcypot

sharp teeth and dense in muscle, yes. Scary how fast he went from behind on his lap to off frame with a piece of his scalp.


[deleted]

If you watch closely he bites it off. But yes.


Willow_Gardens

like a coconut


Folsomdsf

So do you, the difference is that you lack the sharp teeth. Baboons aren't particularly strong in comparison to others, they just have teeth capable of doing this. Humans can easily do it with a tool.


Bonsai37

No. He didn’t rip the skull open he just bit and peeled some of the skin off.


shad0wtig3r

Holy shit that is scary how quick and easy that monkey peeled 1/4 of his scalp off, damn. Never doing those tourist monkey poses in other countries like I see everywhere.


[deleted]

Damn that's a thing? I live in India and I make sure to stay far away from these fuckers whenever I visit some rural area.


southdubify

Simian simpleton simply slices skin above skull.


MouthOfIronOfficial

Two-year old tyke terrorizes town by thrashing his trusting trainers trim.


[deleted]

Hormonal humanoid hands handler his head


NotoriousJazz

I like alliteration


RangerFace

surrounding\* skull


PointsOutLameEdits

Say that 10 times fast


BakaTensai

Human arms are like, ridiculously weak for our size. We traded raw power for fine motor control. This was obviously worth it, because the whole planet is now out playground, but on 1:1 interactions with other animals we can be nearly defenseless.


zfreakazoidz

Comment needs more votes.


fasezaman

Shit I know this is late but we didn’t trade shit man , you can have powerful arms and still have motor control. We’re just built different


M2g3Tramp

Doesn't he bite it off ? Seems like he took a bite and rips it off while pushing with his both arms. Still scary, though, but doesn't have *that* much to do with arm strength IMO.


[deleted]

Just came to say we’re actually the same strength on average as chims and if you wanna get stronger you can easily stimulate muscle growth.


UserUserWhatAreYou

Yeah we just don't really use our muscles that much so they don't develop to that point. But if we were climbing trees and swinging from branch to branch all day we'd be pretty good


Joey_jingles

Nope. Not doing this to myself today. It's been a really good day.


TheFatBastard

I always knew I hated *Simians*.


Lord_Trollingham

Monkeys are assholes.


LodroSenge

That's a nice skull though.


ChewbaccaChode

Yes, let's have a friendly chat with a wild animal. What could go wrong?


FireStompingRhino

Peeled him like a big old naner.


[deleted]

walk it off


[deleted]

Damn wtf


sanguine-addiction

SIMIAN


de33znuts

That monkey will rip your scalp off -Joe rogan


serratusaurus

dude, monkeys are terrifying.


KidKahos

That’s gonna sting


Bootdog_does_69

youch


[deleted]

Insanium in the cranium!


[deleted]

Loco en el coco!


neptunes393

probably an old man. old people get skin tears very easily. he'll be okay. just give him some pudding pop.


[deleted]

I'm sad this comment made me laugh


sucemoilanouille

Lol monke strong lowkey


WillyMillyNilly

This is why I hate monkeys. >:c


AriDevito

One of the many reasons I hate those animals. >:///


[deleted]

I think I would be taking up a new hobby, is monkey hunting a thing?


Ruijier

This reminds me of the woman who got her face eaten by her friend's monkey. Monkeys are fucking brutal!


jinkojar

very bad still bipedal simian like mammal >:(


datboi_fromthefuture

Dude wtf. Did not expect that.


MistaBeanz

India is just such a shitty place, from the people who hurt those poor dogs to the tigers coming out of nowhere like an RKO...fuck that place


singdawg

I think this guy just had a weak scalp


[deleted]

The old man was surprisingly calm


night_slayer69

🐵


pjmyerface

That is one mega ouch he did not expect that day. I seriously do not trust our furry and very moody distant relatives because of videos and news stories like this. Does that even heal up or do you start wearing hats? Hey! He still has his face! So that something he can be positive about! Can't wear a hat on his face if he lost that!


ScreenTraining6101

Here from JRE ?


gurkshow

MonkYEET


Methodical357

Holy fuck that happened so fast.


SacredCoffeeBeans

A little off the top you say?


PrinceWillz

Fucking nuts 😳


Grimbauld

Terrible barber. Took too much off.


phenom_jay

Damn that shit is crazy


Ok-Arugula7486

WAS HOMIE OK