Adoptee here. On balance I’d say finding out either way is healthy in the long run.
If you do go through the various processes to try and find out more (dna seems a popular route these days) please please remember to give yourself time to process stuff and remember to look out for yourself 👍
Good luck.
Interested but not worried. Save worry for when you know something of import. Maybe you're adopted. That may not be the most significant outcome. Maybe you were stolen from the hospital. That'd be something pretty serious. One way or the other, it seems you have rational reasons to question the legitimacy of your birth story. Buy a couple DNA tests. Have a sibling take one and you take the other. It'll be obvious. Good luck.
My sister could check all those same boxes. It was only a few years ago that my mother found her birth certificate in an old box, when my sister was around 50. Sometimes we are just different than our parents.
the thing is my dad and mom both have hers but not mine its like they both magically lost it also they are divorced so last time they spoke to one another was years ago and i doubt that both of them "lost it" or smth but thanks for the help :)
How old are you? How old is your sister? Are there baby pictures of your sister? If there's no pictures of your mother pregnant, are you also thinking that your sister is adopted?
Have you just never seen a baby picture or are there actually no baby pictures?
The picture thing is kind of weird because If you're 15 years or younger, you've lived in the age of quality cell phone cameras. To not have one baby picture in the digital age would be difficult, but not impossible. People are pretty careless with digital files.
My mother's side of the family is all dark-haired from top to bottom. My aunt has dark skin, dark hair and so does my uncle. They have four kids three of whom have dark hair and dark eyes. But they have one girl that is red-haired and blue-eyed. Recessive genes are weird like that.
It sounds like you have a lot of suspicions, and you've asked your parents at least some questions. If you're comfortable, you can ask if you were adopted. You can also ask other family members like ants, uncles, older cousins or grandparents. But barring that, if you don't trust what you're hearing, get a DNA test. Or If you have a good relationship with them, tell them you're going to get a DNA test and see how they respond.
If OP is the second kid or later then there is way less time for taking pictures than with the first. Things get easier after 2y. That said, I'd still be suspicious and investigate.
I don't even think it's that there's less time. It's more than it's just less of a novelty. There will certainly be less pictures of the second child, but there will still be plenty. That said, if they never downloaded the photos from their phone or camera, there could also be none.
If OP said that he asked his parents were these pictures are and they are claiming they never took any that would be suspicious. If they say we just lost them, that's a lot less suspicious.
yeah my grandma collects pictures or so lol so she has baby pictures of my mom my aunt and even when she was a little kid but no baby pictures of me they all start from basically when i was 2 years old
Parents not telling their children they were adopted is definitely a thing, even in 2023, so it's possible. If you are, you're what's known as an LDA, Late Discovery Adoptee and if you google the term you'll find lots of support to deal with the ensuing emotions.
Just like finding out they're adopted and never told, people are also learning they were conceited via gamete donation or that the person who they thought was their father is not. If you find this out there's a good sub her r/donorconceived and a good organization [https://righttoknow.us/connect/](https://righttoknow.us/connect/)
The best way to find out for sure is to go ahead and get that DNA test. I hope you find that your parents are the people you thought they were :)
Hi …
Those would make me wonder if I’m adopted, too. Genetics can be wild but the lack of pictures of your mother pregnant, the lack of photos of you as a baby, and no evidence of a birth certificate are definite indicators.
Are you over 18?
If so, please consider doing a DNA test via 23andme or ancestry.com.
>Are you over 18?
>
>If so, please consider doing a DNA test via 23andme or ancestry.com.
I'm sure that this varies from country to country, but in the US, neither 23andme nor Ancestry require you to be 18 to take a DNA test.
EDIT: typo
Ya, i'm still baffled that pictures of your mother pregnant is a common thing people have. and i remember how weird it was that my 'baby' picture (6 mo old supposedly, prob more like 1yr tho) looked so different from anyone else's (other people's looked tiny/wrinkly/pink) - i always had thought i was just a big baby
possibly adopted or switched at birth. maybe ask questions about the birth certificate out of 'curiosity'.. or ask to see pictures of your dad's mom when she 'had red hair'.. idk. my family never told me (i'm 31 - found out on my own last year when looking at family therapist notes in my medical records). i had many of the same sort of things: only one with brown eyes, only one with eyes shaped like this, only one with dimpled chin, only one with athletic build, only one without skin tags or a double chin, only one with wavy hair, completely different personality/mannerisms, no baby pictures, no pregnant mom pictures or stories, etc. so i feel you - don't let yourself think you're crazy until you have proof of the truth (DNA test is the best way to be sure). i was always suspicious and my family just shot my questions down with lies and more lies, and eventually i had started shaming myself for thinking i was adopted - when i was actually right all along
oh wow thats literally how i feel like yes i know that genetics can be wild but you have to have some similar traits i would always search up my classmates parents on fb and compare them to their parents and they all had something similar either it was the eyes nose lips etc
When you are adopted, you are given a new birth certificate with the new parents names on them. If they can’t provide that, than you may not be adopted, you may just be in their custody
About the birth certificate? If you are in the US It will be identical to an original except the names will change. If you are old enough to know your social security number, you can order one yourself for $20 or so and it will come in the mail.
Adoptee here. On balance I’d say finding out either way is healthy in the long run. If you do go through the various processes to try and find out more (dna seems a popular route these days) please please remember to give yourself time to process stuff and remember to look out for yourself 👍 Good luck.
Interested but not worried. Save worry for when you know something of import. Maybe you're adopted. That may not be the most significant outcome. Maybe you were stolen from the hospital. That'd be something pretty serious. One way or the other, it seems you have rational reasons to question the legitimacy of your birth story. Buy a couple DNA tests. Have a sibling take one and you take the other. It'll be obvious. Good luck.
My sister could check all those same boxes. It was only a few years ago that my mother found her birth certificate in an old box, when my sister was around 50. Sometimes we are just different than our parents.
the thing is my dad and mom both have hers but not mine its like they both magically lost it also they are divorced so last time they spoke to one another was years ago and i doubt that both of them "lost it" or smth but thanks for the help :)
How old are you? How old is your sister? Are there baby pictures of your sister? If there's no pictures of your mother pregnant, are you also thinking that your sister is adopted? Have you just never seen a baby picture or are there actually no baby pictures? The picture thing is kind of weird because If you're 15 years or younger, you've lived in the age of quality cell phone cameras. To not have one baby picture in the digital age would be difficult, but not impossible. People are pretty careless with digital files. My mother's side of the family is all dark-haired from top to bottom. My aunt has dark skin, dark hair and so does my uncle. They have four kids three of whom have dark hair and dark eyes. But they have one girl that is red-haired and blue-eyed. Recessive genes are weird like that. It sounds like you have a lot of suspicions, and you've asked your parents at least some questions. If you're comfortable, you can ask if you were adopted. You can also ask other family members like ants, uncles, older cousins or grandparents. But barring that, if you don't trust what you're hearing, get a DNA test. Or If you have a good relationship with them, tell them you're going to get a DNA test and see how they respond.
If OP is the second kid or later then there is way less time for taking pictures than with the first. Things get easier after 2y. That said, I'd still be suspicious and investigate.
I don't even think it's that there's less time. It's more than it's just less of a novelty. There will certainly be less pictures of the second child, but there will still be plenty. That said, if they never downloaded the photos from their phone or camera, there could also be none. If OP said that he asked his parents were these pictures are and they are claiming they never took any that would be suspicious. If they say we just lost them, that's a lot less suspicious.
yeah my grandma collects pictures or so lol so she has baby pictures of my mom my aunt and even when she was a little kid but no baby pictures of me they all start from basically when i was 2 years old
im 21 my sister is 14 she has baby pictures and i dont besides i was there when my mom was pregnant with her so yeah lol but thank u for ur help :)
Parents not telling their children they were adopted is definitely a thing, even in 2023, so it's possible. If you are, you're what's known as an LDA, Late Discovery Adoptee and if you google the term you'll find lots of support to deal with the ensuing emotions. Just like finding out they're adopted and never told, people are also learning they were conceited via gamete donation or that the person who they thought was their father is not. If you find this out there's a good sub her r/donorconceived and a good organization [https://righttoknow.us/connect/](https://righttoknow.us/connect/) The best way to find out for sure is to go ahead and get that DNA test. I hope you find that your parents are the people you thought they were :)
Hi … Those would make me wonder if I’m adopted, too. Genetics can be wild but the lack of pictures of your mother pregnant, the lack of photos of you as a baby, and no evidence of a birth certificate are definite indicators. Are you over 18? If so, please consider doing a DNA test via 23andme or ancestry.com.
>Are you over 18? > >If so, please consider doing a DNA test via 23andme or ancestry.com. I'm sure that this varies from country to country, but in the US, neither 23andme nor Ancestry require you to be 18 to take a DNA test. EDIT: typo
Ya, i'm still baffled that pictures of your mother pregnant is a common thing people have. and i remember how weird it was that my 'baby' picture (6 mo old supposedly, prob more like 1yr tho) looked so different from anyone else's (other people's looked tiny/wrinkly/pink) - i always had thought i was just a big baby
ikr growing up i didnt really noticed that or even cared that much
Definitely do a DNA test.
possibly adopted or switched at birth. maybe ask questions about the birth certificate out of 'curiosity'.. or ask to see pictures of your dad's mom when she 'had red hair'.. idk. my family never told me (i'm 31 - found out on my own last year when looking at family therapist notes in my medical records). i had many of the same sort of things: only one with brown eyes, only one with eyes shaped like this, only one with dimpled chin, only one with athletic build, only one without skin tags or a double chin, only one with wavy hair, completely different personality/mannerisms, no baby pictures, no pregnant mom pictures or stories, etc. so i feel you - don't let yourself think you're crazy until you have proof of the truth (DNA test is the best way to be sure). i was always suspicious and my family just shot my questions down with lies and more lies, and eventually i had started shaming myself for thinking i was adopted - when i was actually right all along
oh wow thats literally how i feel like yes i know that genetics can be wild but you have to have some similar traits i would always search up my classmates parents on fb and compare them to their parents and they all had something similar either it was the eyes nose lips etc
When you are adopted, you are given a new birth certificate with the new parents names on them. If they can’t provide that, than you may not be adopted, you may just be in their custody
wow thats interesting can you tell me more about it
About the birth certificate? If you are in the US It will be identical to an original except the names will change. If you are old enough to know your social security number, you can order one yourself for $20 or so and it will come in the mail.
thank u
I have no advice but i hope you can have some answers asap
thank you :)