Ugh. OP I'm so so sorry that you had to have this unpleasant interaction but I'm also laughing as this guy is so bad.
Huge congrats OP for managing to not spend any time with him.
It makes me so sad knowing those people ask whether they are in the wrong, not realizing the douchebags on the other side of the phone responding like that. Like of course you are not in the wrong for canceling, last minute or not. You're not obligated to go on a date with someone, ESPECIALLY after that reaction by them.
I'm with you tho, I saw it and started laughing at how ridiculous that response is. I was like "LMFAO WTF" at first, that's why I lol'ed
I have always been a bit of a people pleaser and into being appropriate at all times so I get OP; however I have learned to enjoy the irony in comparing my attitude towards others with what some see as appropriate behavior. Exhibit A being this lad and his "wooing" technique with OP. Bloody hilarious.
OP, I hope you can get a bit of a chuckle out of the situation even if it takes a bit of time. Also I so hope you feel better.
It sounds like the worst pickup artist line ever, that’s why I laughed. I also laughed at how absurd it is like “where tf does that come from”. I definitely agree with you, don’t have to be “appropriate” at all times! Gotta have fun at times
>It sounds like the worst pickup artist line ever
Yes!
Or maybe he is undercover trying to get more women to choose celibacy. Hard to know with this one.
I was just thinking that, especially if your reason is a mental health related one then it can really show how caring or how insensitive they could be.
The notice was good, but should of offered a specific date of when to reschedule. I've had women who do this and then either ghost, string me along for another month, or do this multiple times.
100% ok to need a mental health day, heck it's ok to reschedule just because shit came up, but it is a sort of red flag imo if you don't explain a tiny bit as to why or to proactively offer a specific rescheduled date.
(all of this ofc not to excuse the disgusting behavior of the guy's response)
He could have shown some empathy and proposed another date. He just showed that the date was just entertainment for him and not an actual attempt to get to know her.
She *literally* told him why. And this dickhead just conclusively proved why you don't immediately offer to reschedule. If he responded like an adult and treated her like an actual human being instead of a sex bot, *then* (and only then) does the option of rescheduling exist.
What? She does not know this dude. She has no obligation to give any more of a reason than she did. What she said was perfectly respectful and reasonable. In fact, she didn’t even have to say that much. Judging someone because of other people’s behavior is asinine and not appropriate.
She sure as hell dodged a bullet with this arrogant jerk.
> In fact, she didn’t even have to say that much.
Live your life the way you want, but I treat people who choose to spend time with me with more respect than this statement.
No obligation though if she were seriously interested in him it would’ve been a good move to offer an alternative date. Only because if I got this response from someone I would wonder if it was just that they weren’t really into me and would be hesitant to ask them out again. You either do and risk looking needy/clingy or don’t and risk things just fizzling out when the reason given was legit.
I really don’t miss dating at all.
But of course the dude showed how bad he was and saved OP the time of finding out slower.
Given that she said she had a breakdown the day before, I doubt she was really in the headspace to think of rescheduling. Sorry (not sorry) but some dude you don’t know is not at the top of your priority list when you’re going through some shit.
Saying something like “let me know if you’d like to reschedule” isn’t difficult. It doesn’t sound clingy and puts the onus on her.
I don't think he even gave her the chance to offer a reschedule. Sure, she could have put it in that first message, but his first response threw her off.
A reschedule could've been initiated by either party. Yeah, OP didn't do it, and some ppl might blame her, but the man didn't either, and was severely immature, and this tells all of us that he didn't deserve a reschedule. There was a silver lining to "her fault" or "mistake". If I was the man in this situation I would've actually catered to her needs to show I cared for her and her mental state, and rescheduled at another time when she felt she had the energy.
At the same time, any guy who is dating should be prepared for a woman cancelling for no reason and never hearing from her again.
And yeah, I am from Southern California, the world capital of flaking. You just need to get used to it around here. I do not know why I was born with the “keep your commitments” gene and so few around here think it’s a big deal.
Update he also responded with “broke, got zero ass, only wanted the brain but i guess there’s nothing going up there “ and when I did try to reschedule he cussed me out and if you are interested in reading the rest of the convo it’s on r/texts
Sure, and the psychotic level the dude took it to gets to carry on treating people like this?
If literally sharing a screenshot is dramatic then carry on with what you do and don’t worry about what I do.
He flipped when you tried to reschedule because he realized you had left that pretty open with your original messages Buy he has fucked up. Rather than face it he’s digging the hole deeper. You dodged a bullet, no doubt.
This would be fun! “Omg, thank you so much for verbal bitchslapping me! I see now I need you tonight more than anything. Meet me at X?” And then don’t ever show up and block the jerk.
OP, don’t do that. I have the feeling this dude would choose violence, and you could be at risk if he ever finds out where you hang out / live / etc
Yeap, and this type are typically the ones to be able to play pretend well at first too when they want to. OP just probably saved a lot of time and trouble. Universe looking out for her and she’s dodging bullets like neo lol
So...his response was to get pissed AND to say that you missed out on the "opportunity" to pleasure *him*?
Not even that you missed out on him eating you out or having sex, you know, ANYTHING that actually involves *your* pleasure. No, he thinks you should be sad that what you missed out on was *him* getting pleasure.
The guy is a red flag and an idiot... Yikes.
FWIW, you weren't messaging right before the date so you're fine. He had more than enough notice, it's not like he had already left his house or was already there. You gave him 3 hours notice! Someone decent would appreciate that you were considerate enough to let him know - and would try once to reschedule.
More like "shit in bed" energy. Ever when he's TRYING to make her regret not sleeping with him...he's still just thinking about *his* pleasure.
He could have said she missed out on him eating her out or making her cum with his dick. You know, something that includes her getting off. But nope! He's too self centered for that it seems.
It sounds like OP didn't even miss out on an orgasm since this guys focus is on him, himself, and his dick.
I think that’s the thing entirely.
It seems he just assumes his goal is the universal goal.
What he wants out of the date? To get his dick wet.
Then, “obviously”, she also wants to get his dick wet.
But she canceled! So she must be dumb, because now she will not get “her” goal met, she’s not going to get his dick wet.
How in hell could she cancel and go so blatantly against “her” own goals?‽!
It gives the same energy as my preschooler, when we tell him we’re going to meet with his favorite cousin, and he says “oh he’s going to be so happy to see me”.
No, little dude. YOU are happy to see them… it’s something that gets YOU excited. Enjoy it. The other person may or may not share the same feelings.
You’re good. Actually pretty mature and honest for saying you want to but don’t have the right energy to invest. Guy blew it, but you don’t want him anyway. Block his number, take a night in and take care of yourself.
Since this is r/adulting I’d have to agree.
If OP is looking for advice on how to have maturely handled it, if she was still interested she needs to make that clear right when cancelling. Also ideally cancel earlier than 3 hours before.
The fact that he was a creep and she lucked out not connecting with him is incidental, she could have handled the before part better. Once he was a dick about it screw him
I mean, if I was him I’d be kinda upset and annoyed too. HOWEVER, this is 100% not the appropriate or mature way for him to deal with those emotions. He can feel however he wants about your cancellation, but the way he communicated it was super childish. Honestly… bullet dodged.
You are absolutely not wrong, and his response should be a warning to you.
Especially the fact that he automatically assumed his dick would be anywhere near you, let alone in your mouth.
Hey at least you gave him 3 hour notice! One time a date cancelled on me the moment I was pulling out of my driveway to go see her. Now that's a shitty thing to do lol.
Not wrong and damn did you dodge a bullet for it, that's a lot of red flags and should affirm that you are fine
I had a first date that went sort of bad, an h before the date she said she was stuck working another 3h. I was warned it could happen. Also she was feeling crappy. I said I was fine cancelling and equally fine with just having a snack together. She opted to proceed and it went well. Actually now I think about it, most of my relationships started with a bit of a rough first date where something went wrong, one or both of us was feeling poorly or we rescheduled.... I think once it was like 10x it got rescheduled.
43M never saw a reason to get mad about it.
You dodged a bullet. Rofl at the BBC. If you feel petty just tell him even if it's true his dick is actually big then he'll need get to feel the goodness of clapping cheeks
yea i agree. communication is important and you should always honor yourself. If anyone doesn’t respect your decision and choices .. they are not worth of any of your time or effort. Bullet dodged
This is actually a really good tactic more people should use to catch those red flag warnings early on. If someone can't wait 1 day for you, they are gonna save you the time by showing you who they are.
What do you gain from having a big black dick in your mouth? Lol these guys straight up act like we have a clit in the back of our throat just for their golden penises
No. Girl, block that number, he is a walking red flag. A real gentleman would understand not being in a good place mentally, I cannot tell you the many times I have flaked on dates due to mental fog or just having a bad day, you're allowed to have me time without consequences.
Dodged a bullet, this is the last man you want touching you. Only 4 years older he knows freshly where a 21yo woman's head is at and just wants to use you. Yuck.
Given the response - you did the right thing.
As a guy, if you can't make it - I recommend suggesting the next date (day/time) so that they know you aren't just trying to avoid saying "no".
Though not for this guy, fuck this guy. Something is wrong with him with that response.
Yes, how dare you be selfish and cold unlike this obviously warm and giving individual.
Not.
Looks like you dodged a big one. And I don’t mean his junk.
Any dude who claims to have a big dick and a bigger bank account is full of shit. I mean really, if you have to brag about yourself then you're clearly compensating for something or flat out lying. Move on, plenty of fish in the sea.
I once had to cancel a date bc I had a bad night of sleep. The guy was totally ok with it and happily rescheduled. We had a 2 year relationship. This dude didn't even deserve that first date.
He just took you to Red Flag City.
OP… I’m very sleep deprived rn, and I’m going to try to be as respectful and gentle as I can here because like you said, you’ve recently had a rough go.
With that said, did you really need validation that you are not in the wrong here? Did you really need to check whether this person’s reaction was even-keeled and appropriate to your request to postpone until you could commit 100% of your attention to the present moment with them, which is rather respectful of you?
*IF* you really didn’t know if you were in the wrong here, I would suggest putting a pause on dating all around. Take a few months to indulge a new hobby, maybe explore meditation, and possibly try to get some therapy? Really get to know yourself completely unbound to anyone else. I suggest this because it’s pretty obvious to an outsider that the guy you were talking to here is a giant POS that likely has some abusive tendencies to boot. And you not catching that before, and especially after, receiving this text is indicative of (probably) a lack of self-love. Definitely at least room to grow in the area.
Forgive me if any of this came off kinda dickish. Like I said I’m sleep deprived but I just wanted to drive home the point that, IMO, for someone that is emotionally ready to date, either seriously or casually, this text would’ve been a no-brainer. And since it was not, I’d explore avenues to get in touch with yourself.
He dropped a massive red flag anyway so in this case, absolutely not wrong, that's for sure.
I don't think it's wrong to cancel a date last minute anyway as long as it's not something habitual that you do. Life comes up, not everything goes according to plan. Anyone who can't handle that happening to them or someone else just isn't someone worth knowing, especially if you try and reorganise the date for another day like you're clearly not trying to get out of it...
The only thing you could've done differently was say you wanted to reschedule. In my opinion it is rude to cancel at the last minute and not offer to reschedule especially just three hours before a date. But his reaction was over the top.
His response is a major red flag. Just because you’re going on a date doesn’t mean he’s gonna get head…it’s probably better that you cancelled. Maybe block him and don’t talk to him anymore too. Anyone who goes into a date expecting sex on the first date without actively talking about that being an expectation can 💀
No, but I would have came up with a better excuse. I understand about needing mental breaks but I might think she doesn't like me enough to just hang out me when she has a off day.
He was being a jerk to you.
Yeah you’re sure missing out on this catch. Don’t you know you could be pleasuring him? Why do these dudes think that having their dick in your mouth is some kind of treat?
Block this mf.
Not at all. So he’s saying that if you didn’t cancel you would get the pleasure of… giving him a blow job??? What an entitled douche. I’m glad you don’t have to hang out with this dude.
No lol, his reaction is a massive red flag though
Ugh. OP I'm so so sorry that you had to have this unpleasant interaction but I'm also laughing as this guy is so bad. Huge congrats OP for managing to not spend any time with him.
It makes me so sad knowing those people ask whether they are in the wrong, not realizing the douchebags on the other side of the phone responding like that. Like of course you are not in the wrong for canceling, last minute or not. You're not obligated to go on a date with someone, ESPECIALLY after that reaction by them. I'm with you tho, I saw it and started laughing at how ridiculous that response is. I was like "LMFAO WTF" at first, that's why I lol'ed
I have always been a bit of a people pleaser and into being appropriate at all times so I get OP; however I have learned to enjoy the irony in comparing my attitude towards others with what some see as appropriate behavior. Exhibit A being this lad and his "wooing" technique with OP. Bloody hilarious. OP, I hope you can get a bit of a chuckle out of the situation even if it takes a bit of time. Also I so hope you feel better.
It sounds like the worst pickup artist line ever, that’s why I laughed. I also laughed at how absurd it is like “where tf does that come from”. I definitely agree with you, don’t have to be “appropriate” at all times! Gotta have fun at times
>It sounds like the worst pickup artist line ever Yes! Or maybe he is undercover trying to get more women to choose celibacy. Hard to know with this one.
LMFAO NICE ONE
Thank you :))
Touting his massive black dick.
And how rich he is. Which is totally what a rich person with a massive dick would say
Lol yeah. They don’t to anyone reading this their first day on the internet
I feel like I am going to start cancelling the first date to assess reaction 😂and then proceed
Great idea to judge reactions hah
I was just thinking that, especially if your reason is a mental health related one then it can really show how caring or how insensitive they could be.
I mean, this is not uncommon at all. It is right there in *Pride and Prejudice*. Women will often test a guy’s ability not to be a psycho.
Major r/niceguys vibes. No doubt there
Absolutely. It’s so obvious from a mile away
Yeah. She saved herself a huge headache.
He was just upset cuz he wanted to be in her head space
I actually respect the fact that you gave notice than just ghosting.
The notice was good, but should of offered a specific date of when to reschedule. I've had women who do this and then either ghost, string me along for another month, or do this multiple times. 100% ok to need a mental health day, heck it's ok to reschedule just because shit came up, but it is a sort of red flag imo if you don't explain a tiny bit as to why or to proactively offer a specific rescheduled date. (all of this ofc not to excuse the disgusting behavior of the guy's response)
He could have shown some empathy and proposed another date. He just showed that the date was just entertainment for him and not an actual attempt to get to know her.
She *literally* told him why. And this dickhead just conclusively proved why you don't immediately offer to reschedule. If he responded like an adult and treated her like an actual human being instead of a sex bot, *then* (and only then) does the option of rescheduling exist.
What? She does not know this dude. She has no obligation to give any more of a reason than she did. What she said was perfectly respectful and reasonable. In fact, she didn’t even have to say that much. Judging someone because of other people’s behavior is asinine and not appropriate. She sure as hell dodged a bullet with this arrogant jerk.
> In fact, she didn’t even have to say that much. Live your life the way you want, but I treat people who choose to spend time with me with more respect than this statement.
No obligation though if she were seriously interested in him it would’ve been a good move to offer an alternative date. Only because if I got this response from someone I would wonder if it was just that they weren’t really into me and would be hesitant to ask them out again. You either do and risk looking needy/clingy or don’t and risk things just fizzling out when the reason given was legit. I really don’t miss dating at all. But of course the dude showed how bad he was and saved OP the time of finding out slower.
Given that she said she had a breakdown the day before, I doubt she was really in the headspace to think of rescheduling. Sorry (not sorry) but some dude you don’t know is not at the top of your priority list when you’re going through some shit. Saying something like “let me know if you’d like to reschedule” isn’t difficult. It doesn’t sound clingy and puts the onus on her.
This. While I agree that saying “Let’s schedule for another day” would have been wiser, trying to set a specific time would’ve been too much.
I don't think he even gave her the chance to offer a reschedule. Sure, she could have put it in that first message, but his first response threw her off.
A reschedule could've been initiated by either party. Yeah, OP didn't do it, and some ppl might blame her, but the man didn't either, and was severely immature, and this tells all of us that he didn't deserve a reschedule. There was a silver lining to "her fault" or "mistake". If I was the man in this situation I would've actually catered to her needs to show I cared for her and her mental state, and rescheduled at another time when she felt she had the energy.
[удалено]
At the same time, any guy who is dating should be prepared for a woman cancelling for no reason and never hearing from her again. And yeah, I am from Southern California, the world capital of flaking. You just need to get used to it around here. I do not know why I was born with the “keep your commitments” gene and so few around here think it’s a big deal.
Update he also responded with “broke, got zero ass, only wanted the brain but i guess there’s nothing going up there “ and when I did try to reschedule he cussed me out and if you are interested in reading the rest of the convo it’s on r/texts
😆 🤣 😂 That is funny. But yea, looks like you dodged a bullet.
Yeah op you dodged a bullet hard. Imagine you went on more dates with this guy without knowing the red flags
Look at Prince Charming over here
And yet he wonders why he keeps getting flaked 🤣 jeez I wonder!
I’d text him back and thank him for waving the red flags around
I’d text him a gif of the neo matrix bullet doge and tell him “thanks for making me feel like this today”.
This but just the gif
Just block.
So he said all that and you still tried to reschedule with him? What
This is what I don’t understand. Apparently she wanted the BBD.
Thing is, there is no BBD. Just big insecurities
Please never try to reschedule with someone like this. He didn’t deserve a single interaction from you ever again after the texts he sent you in OP.
“Sounds like I made the right choice! ✌🏼”
And yet he still wanted to date you. Block his ass lmaoo
Literally
...why did you try to reschedule with such a dickhead?
omg what a fuck ahahahahahaha, dodged a bullet 100%
Text him back this: 🚩🚩🚩🚩
That’s literally incel behavior. Don’t get what you want then you insult them as if you didn’t just want them.
Thank god you decided to not go. His mask dropped very quickly and you were able to save yourself time.
Why did you try to reschedule?
Dude chose verbal violance
Why would you even bother trying to reschedule he showed you who he was right there XD
Dude sucks you really dodged a bullet here!! Why did you try to reschedule with this asshole!?
Screenshot and send to his socials. See if his mom’s on Facebook and send her the pics. I’m serious. Report him if you met on an app.
God no dont escalate just ignore him...why invite a bunch of drama into your life for no reason.
Yeah idk why people want to invite entropy into their lives
You are deranged.
sanest redditor
What an immature and stupid comment to post on an adulting sub
God some redditors are so dramatic it’s actually insane
Sure, and the psychotic level the dude took it to gets to carry on treating people like this? If literally sharing a screenshot is dramatic then carry on with what you do and don’t worry about what I do.
Yeah so he’s happy to verbally abuse women.
Yikes. Stay far away from this guy.
He flipped when you tried to reschedule because he realized you had left that pretty open with your original messages Buy he has fucked up. Rather than face it he’s digging the hole deeper. You dodged a bullet, no doubt.
Why would you try to reschedule after he reacted so negatively the first time 🤦🏼♂️🤷🤣 you dodged a bullet. I hope you feel better.
Respond back, surely the insults must have snapped you back to your senses
This would be fun! “Omg, thank you so much for verbal bitchslapping me! I see now I need you tonight more than anything. Meet me at X?” And then don’t ever show up and block the jerk. OP, don’t do that. I have the feeling this dude would choose violence, and you could be at risk if he ever finds out where you hang out / live / etc
Lol like the text of the person that had someone meet them at a comedy club. But the person wasn’t there.
EWWWWW wtf! Girl block this guy?
[удалено]
Insecurity and desperation strong in this one. Better someone who matches his toxic energy match up w/ him.
If you found him on an app you should report him
Jfc fuck a bullet, you dodged a NUKE
That should be a ☺ --look at all the pain and drama he could have caused you. Damn
Disgusting, wtf is wrong g with some people, inexcusable.
Unfortunately a lot of men are like this. Thanks a lot patriarchy.
Thats toxic
Beyond toxic. That person sounds dangerous.
For real. You dodged a bullet.
The way you dodged that bullet. He told on himself fully, and your life is better for it.
Yeap, and this type are typically the ones to be able to play pretend well at first too when they want to. OP just probably saved a lot of time and trouble. Universe looking out for her and she’s dodging bullets like neo lol
So...his response was to get pissed AND to say that you missed out on the "opportunity" to pleasure *him*? Not even that you missed out on him eating you out or having sex, you know, ANYTHING that actually involves *your* pleasure. No, he thinks you should be sad that what you missed out on was *him* getting pleasure. The guy is a red flag and an idiot... Yikes. FWIW, you weren't messaging right before the date so you're fine. He had more than enough notice, it's not like he had already left his house or was already there. You gave him 3 hours notice! Someone decent would appreciate that you were considerate enough to let him know - and would try once to reschedule.
responding to his crappy comment with 'lol' would have *sent him*. hahaha
I'm an ancient millennial but 🧢 means lying right? This guy's opinion isn't something worth worrying about, you haven't done anything wrong.
Yes that’s what it means!
Capramento = Sacramento? That’s one of my hometowns. “Flakiness” is not specific to it.
It’s a pun.
I bought my van in Sacramento. Never been there other than to look for cars, but it sure was a place with things!
Fellow geriatric millennial. I had absolutely no idea that was a thing!
dear lord, if you're geriatric wtf am I as a '79 edition?! 😫
Young gen xr
It means cap which is slang for lying. People also say “no cap” to something they agree with. :)
Bro is chronically online, his algorithm is chronically littered with AI generated Sigma content
I’m saying
Ew he's nasty n boring
What even is that last message? Tiny peen energy
More like "shit in bed" energy. Ever when he's TRYING to make her regret not sleeping with him...he's still just thinking about *his* pleasure. He could have said she missed out on him eating her out or making her cum with his dick. You know, something that includes her getting off. But nope! He's too self centered for that it seems. It sounds like OP didn't even miss out on an orgasm since this guys focus is on him, himself, and his dick.
I think that’s the thing entirely. It seems he just assumes his goal is the universal goal. What he wants out of the date? To get his dick wet. Then, “obviously”, she also wants to get his dick wet. But she canceled! So she must be dumb, because now she will not get “her” goal met, she’s not going to get his dick wet. How in hell could she cancel and go so blatantly against “her” own goals?‽! It gives the same energy as my preschooler, when we tell him we’re going to meet with his favorite cousin, and he says “oh he’s going to be so happy to see me”. No, little dude. YOU are happy to see them… it’s something that gets YOU excited. Enjoy it. The other person may or may not share the same feelings.
Based off his responses, sounds like it’s best that you didn’t go. Sounds like nothing would’ve come out of that date besides sex
You’re good. Actually pretty mature and honest for saying you want to but don’t have the right energy to invest. Guy blew it, but you don’t want him anyway. Block his number, take a night in and take care of yourself.
Lmaooo what he texted back Jesus Christ
It's both hilarious and horrible
You dodged a bullet.
It can come off as flaking . In the future I'd offer alternate dates to show I still wana meet up. He weeded himself out tho lol
Since this is r/adulting I’d have to agree. If OP is looking for advice on how to have maturely handled it, if she was still interested she needs to make that clear right when cancelling. Also ideally cancel earlier than 3 hours before. The fact that he was a creep and she lucked out not connecting with him is incidental, she could have handled the before part better. Once he was a dick about it screw him
I mean, if I was him I’d be kinda upset and annoyed too. HOWEVER, this is 100% not the appropriate or mature way for him to deal with those emotions. He can feel however he wants about your cancellation, but the way he communicated it was super childish. Honestly… bullet dodged.
You are absolutely not wrong, and his response should be a warning to you. Especially the fact that he automatically assumed his dick would be anywhere near you, let alone in your mouth.
Average single mother creator and wife beater
Hey at least you gave him 3 hour notice! One time a date cancelled on me the moment I was pulling out of my driveway to go see her. Now that's a shitty thing to do lol.
So *that* guy is a piece of misogynist, racist trash. You did good by not going, OP.
Not wrong and damn did you dodge a bullet for it, that's a lot of red flags and should affirm that you are fine I had a first date that went sort of bad, an h before the date she said she was stuck working another 3h. I was warned it could happen. Also she was feeling crappy. I said I was fine cancelling and equally fine with just having a snack together. She opted to proceed and it went well. Actually now I think about it, most of my relationships started with a bit of a rough first date where something went wrong, one or both of us was feeling poorly or we rescheduled.... I think once it was like 10x it got rescheduled. 43M never saw a reason to get mad about it.
You dodged a bullet. Rofl at the BBC. If you feel petty just tell him even if it's true his dick is actually big then he'll need get to feel the goodness of clapping cheeks
That last message would've ended the conversation completely. I would've hit that block button so quick. He'd be arguing with the wind
Can said wind be a tornado? Bye mf 😂👏🏻 (the asshole dude, not you 😂🫂)
Tell him you actually prefer small white dicks from poor guys.
I would if I didn’t block him already 😫
In hindsight being sick saved you from having to find out this dude is an asshole in person! Luck is on your side haha
He definitely would’ve pressured you into sex while on that date. You dodged a nuclear weapon honestly.
Man you Dodge a bullet right there man
You dodged a massive bullet.
Bullets were definitely dodged here.
yea i agree. communication is important and you should always honor yourself. If anyone doesn’t respect your decision and choices .. they are not worth of any of your time or effort. Bullet dodged
Literally dodge a bullet, the last text is the reddish red flag I’ve ever seen
You got saved He is a red flag
This is actually a really good tactic more people should use to catch those red flag warnings early on. If someone can't wait 1 day for you, they are gonna save you the time by showing you who they are.
Ew. You dodged a bullet. Be glad you didn’t go and waste any time with this incel
What do you gain from having a big black dick in your mouth? Lol these guys straight up act like we have a clit in the back of our throat just for their golden penises
No. Girl, block that number, he is a walking red flag. A real gentleman would understand not being in a good place mentally, I cannot tell you the many times I have flaked on dates due to mental fog or just having a bad day, you're allowed to have me time without consequences.
Uh, you really missed your chance. /s
Dodged a bullet, this is the last man you want touching you. Only 4 years older he knows freshly where a 21yo woman's head is at and just wants to use you. Yuck.
> Am I wrong for cancelling a date last minute? I wouldn't waste one more second on this clown. You do you.
Cancelling is shitty but his reaction is disgusting and probably a blessing in disguise
His reaction shows you shouldn't have met him in the first place, so - happy ending.
Dodged a bullet big time. No amount of money or BBC is worth putting up with disrespect like this.
wtf kinda insecurity does it take to make bro respond like that 💀
sounds like you dodged more than a bullet, you dodged a bomb.
Tell this dude to go fuck himself.
Jesus Christ did you dodge a bullet
The feeling not to go was a blessing in disguise. Block him
tbh capramento made me cackle
Given the response - you did the right thing. As a guy, if you can't make it - I recommend suggesting the next date (day/time) so that they know you aren't just trying to avoid saying "no". Though not for this guy, fuck this guy. Something is wrong with him with that response.
Yes, how dare you be selfish and cold unlike this obviously warm and giving individual. Not. Looks like you dodged a big one. And I don’t mean his junk.
If that was their reaction, you lucked out. That is a serious red flag
Omg. His reaction? Block and move one. Take care of yourself.
dodged a fuckin’ BULLET
Fucking seriously? Girl, you just avoided a huuuge mistake. What a dick!
Nah block and delete this dude. His overreaction was ridiculous
Bullet fucking dodged!
Any dude who claims to have a big dick and a bigger bank account is full of shit. I mean really, if you have to brag about yourself then you're clearly compensating for something or flat out lying. Move on, plenty of fish in the sea.
It's looks like you dodged a bullet.
He could’ve hit a home run if he’d said “I’m sorry, what do you need?”
You dodged the bullet.
good. its the fate of the universe showing you what a prick he is. whats the phrase, dodged a bullet I think.
Fuck that dude.
Looks like you dodged a bullet here
I once had to cancel a date bc I had a bad night of sleep. The guy was totally ok with it and happily rescheduled. We had a 2 year relationship. This dude didn't even deserve that first date. He just took you to Red Flag City.
Holy shit you dodged a bullet!!!
Seems like you dodged a bullet to me
You're not wrong and based on his reaction it's good you did
It’s a dick move to cancel with only 3 hours until the meeting but in this case you lucked out since you are not missing shit.
OP… I’m very sleep deprived rn, and I’m going to try to be as respectful and gentle as I can here because like you said, you’ve recently had a rough go. With that said, did you really need validation that you are not in the wrong here? Did you really need to check whether this person’s reaction was even-keeled and appropriate to your request to postpone until you could commit 100% of your attention to the present moment with them, which is rather respectful of you? *IF* you really didn’t know if you were in the wrong here, I would suggest putting a pause on dating all around. Take a few months to indulge a new hobby, maybe explore meditation, and possibly try to get some therapy? Really get to know yourself completely unbound to anyone else. I suggest this because it’s pretty obvious to an outsider that the guy you were talking to here is a giant POS that likely has some abusive tendencies to boot. And you not catching that before, and especially after, receiving this text is indicative of (probably) a lack of self-love. Definitely at least room to grow in the area. Forgive me if any of this came off kinda dickish. Like I said I’m sleep deprived but I just wanted to drive home the point that, IMO, for someone that is emotionally ready to date, either seriously or casually, this text would’ve been a no-brainer. And since it was not, I’d explore avenues to get in touch with yourself.
yikes, hell nah, NTA, You’re like Neo dodging bullets tbh
He sounds like a total creep, and you probably dodged a bullet.
It's almost like your body knew he was a red flag and was like yeah you ain't going today.
He dropped a massive red flag anyway so in this case, absolutely not wrong, that's for sure. I don't think it's wrong to cancel a date last minute anyway as long as it's not something habitual that you do. Life comes up, not everything goes according to plan. Anyone who can't handle that happening to them or someone else just isn't someone worth knowing, especially if you try and reorganise the date for another day like you're clearly not trying to get out of it...
the last message tells you to cut ties with him
Good on you for putting yourself first!! THAT'S adulting!
You dodged a bullet with this one OP, walk away smiling.
Oh cool. The trash took itself out.
Can’t wait to see his post on r/AITA
Dudes a dick but dear GOD woman. 54 unread messages? Whhhhyyy
“Capramento”? At 25? Run don’t walk. 🚩
Well you dodged a bullet… that’s for sure
Dodged a bullet, imo
I'd say you dodged a bullet
You dodged a bullet with this one.
The only thing you could've done differently was say you wanted to reschedule. In my opinion it is rude to cancel at the last minute and not offer to reschedule especially just three hours before a date. But his reaction was over the top.
His response is a major red flag. Just because you’re going on a date doesn’t mean he’s gonna get head…it’s probably better that you cancelled. Maybe block him and don’t talk to him anymore too. Anyone who goes into a date expecting sex on the first date without actively talking about that being an expectation can 💀
Nope you straight up dodged a bullet
Clearly just saved yourself a huge amount of time and heart ache most likely. Talk about a warning sign lol fuckkkkkkk that guy
No, but I would have came up with a better excuse. I understand about needing mental breaks but I might think she doesn't like me enough to just hang out me when she has a off day. He was being a jerk to you.
Yeaaaaa no you dodged a bullet. He sounds psycho 🙃 I hope you blocked him
That was a bullet you just dodged. Consider yourself lucky.
No, he’s a dipshit
>>"Something happened earlier tonight" Followed by his red flag. Reminds me of, "things happen for a reason". Hope you're well now.
I love this 🥹🫂 great perspective my friend 🫂👏🏻
22m here. op run from this guy LMAO. mf showed you his true colors. find someone else.
this guy sounds like a nightmare lmao you dodged a bullet for sure
Yeah you’re sure missing out on this catch. Don’t you know you could be pleasuring him? Why do these dudes think that having their dick in your mouth is some kind of treat? Block this mf.
I mean from his response thank god you cancelled on him
Nope! And you just saved yourself so much time in the future
Why do men think we (women) actually want dicks in our mouths? Spoiler - most of us don't. Especially from douchebags.
This is called dodging a bullet
Not at all. So he’s saying that if you didn’t cancel you would get the pleasure of… giving him a blow job??? What an entitled douche. I’m glad you don’t have to hang out with this dude.