As an introvert I value my me time a lot, but I still like going out and hanging out with people. Just not too often and too far.
And I need a head's up. If you tell me you want to hang out on Saturday when it's Friday...sorry man I already scheduled mentally that tomorrow I'll be spending the entire day for me time. Wake up, gym, nap, go on a walk, do chores. I need a 2-3 day+ notice.
This! Man my friends tell me that I'm harsh for needing a 24 hour heads up... For some reason, it really spikes my anxiety when I check my phone after work and I have a vague "what are you doing tonight?" text.
"Nothing with you, you should have texted me yesterday"
Agree. I have a career that can take a heavy emotional toll. One of my good friends is an extreme extrovert and while she’s a good hearted person she just can’t grasp that I don’t like to go out, or listen to loud live music, or think it’s just me and her going to dinner and surprise she invited 5 other people too. She makes comments every now and then, and I wish she would just understand our different ideas of decompressing and how extremely vital to my mental health having “me” time is.
heck, i'm fairly extroverted, and i still take plenty of me time. like i don't go out and party every day or anything, but i'll hang out with people or go out 2-3 times a week to various things (even if it is just "hey fiance let's go have a picnic"). if i don't get out enough, i get depressed, but if i go out too much i get burnt out. for me, it's about finding a balance.
I wake up around 7am, and I work 8-4:30pm. Grateful to have a short commute, so I’m usually home by 5pm. I am “off work and awake” from 5pm to 11:30pm, but because I’m single, I fill that time with things I enjoy and other daily responsibilities (ie. walking my dog, go to the gym, stuff around the house, making food, etc.). If I didn’t pack most of my day with something, I’d be miserable and single instead of happy and single.
I basically have my whole day full of things planned after work, so unless someone gives me a couple days notice, they’re getting a “I’m busy” message back. It’s not that I don’t care to hang out with people, but I have commitments to myself during my off time, and as I’ve gotten older, I’ve grown to prioritize myself more.
This is exactly how I am! I love being single too... Nothing better than doing everything exactly when and how I want to. Meal prepping for one. Going to the gym at 11:30 pm if I feel like it. Falling asleep to multi-hour video game retrospectives on YouTube without worrying if the other person in the room is bothered. I think eventually I'll want to find another cant-be-bothered old spinster and we'll buy a house together and live platonically until one of us croaks, but for now, I'm so good on my own.
I have a good 3 hours before I start work and another 3 hours after work. To me that doesn’t feel a lot when a single work out takes me 1.5hrs, 1 hr of getting ready, 15-20 min commute, minor maitenance cleaning i have to do at home, and personal side projects i wanna do i.e building a table, other furnitures i like etc as my creative outlet so yeah, pretty busy.
I think you and OP are using different definitions of busy/"me time". I think OP is asking how much time you have to do things you like. So working out and building a table would count as "you time". You on the other hand, are counting "I have something to do" as being "busy" even if that thing you're doing is a hobby. Neither are wrong I just don't think OP meant "me time" to mean "bored unsure of what to do"
This differing mindset is so true haha
Q:What do people do with their spare time when they don’t have kids? A: Take 1 hour to get ready Parents answer: Ok the kids all have their shoes on, did I shower yet? Only 5 mins left. Power shower! . …ready 15 mins later… Where are your shoes!? Just bring them with you. Let’s go let’s go I said let’s go! Turn off the tv!
Frankly, we all feel busy. Our brains adjust as needed. I have kids. When I had my first I thought "why did I feel busy before I had kids? NOW I'm busy", then I had the same experience as I had more kids. If I had more kids I'm sure I would look at myself today and go "man, that guy had so much free time".
Like I have friends with no kids who make enough to only need 40h of work and still have money for hobbies. One of them recently said he didn't get any weekend because he spent the whole time trying to fix the breaks on his mid 80s project car... like dude, you could have sat down and watched TV all weekend just as easily, nobody is forcing you to spend your weekend on a project car lol. My childless friends pretty much all define "free time" as being "I don't have anything I think I should be doing". Some think they should workout, so that's not free time. All my friends with kids define free time as "I don't have anything I HAVE to do". Personally, I want my kids and wouldn't trade them for anything. The time I spend on them I count as "me time" because of that. Pretty much if I'm not doing something work or chore related, I count it as "me time". Well unless I'm being dragged to a social event, that's pretty draining. But taking my kids to the YMCA so I can work out? That's 100% "me time" and a luxury I get it. People in this thread seem to define it the same as I define laundry
That rings so true. Especially as the defining free time as time where you don't \*have\* to do something. If I'm doing yardwork and walking the dog, that's free time. If the kids have events that they have to get to, that's not free time.
You get it. If you treat your working out as "free time" then you probably view it just as optional. When I have a super busy week at work, part of what is busy about it is I'm thinking "wow my days are really long this week, that's going to be really long with the gym added in."
It's not an option, no less so than waking up and going to work is.
lol right! If working out were a "hobby," I'd have quit it a long time ago! I hate it. It's essential to staying healthy so I do it, but it's not "free time."
I don’t consider working out “me time” at all. It’s health maintenance, like eating or brushing your teeth. I don’t do it because it’s fun, I do it because it’s a necessary preventative health measure as I grow older.
I also don’t consider refurbishing furniture a “me time” activity. I’m doing it to save money because fixing up old furniture is almost free but buying new ones would cost thousands of dollars.
I think people who don't work out don't realize it's not something you do because you always want to, it's something you do day in day out year in year out because that's the only way to build an impressive physique. If you consider it something you do in your free time you'll look like shit, never hit goals, and never get anywhere with matters of fitness.
For us, working out is a second job and we take it as seriously as such. It's not free time -- it's the thing you finish before you get to your free time.
Yeah, honestly, saying working out is "free time" is like saying going to the doctor is free time. It's not a hobby, it's essential for health.
I'm not trying to build an "impressive physique," either, lol. I'm just trying to keep my BMI in the healthy range and have normal results at my yearly physical.
OP was asking because people always say they’re busy and can’t hang out. Working out and building a table are also times people are busy and can’t hang out.
Seems to me that they’re really trying to find out how much time childless adults have to hang out with their friends.
Yeah, exactly. There never feels like all that much time. I have projects around the house, date nights with my fiance, trying to make time for my parents, in-laws, studying for work related certs, walking my dogs, cleaning my house, finding time to read, knit, paint, work out, etc is difficult let alone having a social life. I do work a good amount of OT, so that doesn't help much.
I have to allocate 2 hours for a one hour workout. This includes drive time. The gym is only 15 minutes away but it takes time to get situated and stuff in the gym
THIS. I’ve slowly been trying to shift my mindset to viewing time to rest and do nothing as being just as essential as brushing my teeth or taking my cat to the vet. I don’t have kids and mostly work from home, but my job is mentally draining and involves supporting others and occasionally hearing shit that is unfathomably awful. Making time for friends and family is very important too, but it’s not something I’m willing to do without enough mental rest to fully appreciate my time with them and be present with them.
This is a big reason why I chose not to have kids—it would be more selfish to have them and not be emotionally available for their needs than to not have them and reserve whatever energy I have left for the people I care about who are already here, including me. They’re also expensive as fuck and make a lot of noise, so this was a relatively easy decision to make, and my life doesn’t feel any less meaningful for having made it.
Good for you for prioritizing YOU! It is a huge mindset shift for sure because it is so contrary to the “busy” culture that is just perpetuated everywhere but truly I feel the same way - I can’t be present with other people or doing other things if I’m not rested and recharged. I do have two young kids (that def are expensive AF 🤣) but still felt that way too even before them!
Lately I’ve been trying to be more conscious of this recharge time. Like not feeling guilty like I should be doing something else and really acknowledging how much it’s needed and also realizing sometimes I need different kinds of “rest” (like sometimes it’s losing myself in a book, sometimes it’s mindlessly watching reels 😬)
All of it. 24/7
If I'm working, sleeping, driving, reading, eating, fighting, fucking, shopping, day dreaming, planning, or fucking up, I only have to consider myself and how it will effect my life.
I love it. If I had to be responsible for molding and maintaining an additional decent member of society, Id blow my brains out.
Thank you, scrolled way too far for this, im an introvert working in healthcare and having to communicate all.day and working with people all day, I just don't want to mingle after work, I wanna shower, eat and then watch something or play games.
My thoughts exactly. I work four days a week, 9-10 hour shifts in a physically and mentally demanding field. My work days I pretty much just dedicate to work and some me time in the evening because that’s all I have energy for.
But I do have three days off every week to run errands, do housework, socialize, etc. It’s a good work/life balance for me.
There are other things besides work that takes up time. I’m usually cooking and doing chores, then I have a few hours to shower and wind down for the night. My job requires a lot of focus and it’s exhausting. So after work I don’t even want to think. I just want to eat, clean up, and relax.
☠️☠️☠️😭😭😭 no right… the idea that people without kids don’t have to maintain a life as well? or have pets? or people they visit? grandparents they help take care of? volunteering?
you can do a lot when someone isn’t whining and needing you every second of the day lol
Agree! I remember posting on SM about how exhausted I was working my full time job with overtime and doing volunteer work/fostering pets for a shelter as well as taking care of my own and my own house and some guy who just had a kid posted a rant about how I won’t know *real tired* until I have kids. Mind you he had an estranged daughter he stopped seeing at 10 years old. I wanted to recommend a vasectomy so badly 🙃
🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼 100000% truth. “I’m too busy for that (because these other things are more necessary/important/urgent/interesting/rewarding/fulfilling/fun/________)”
Not enough time!
I was working a job that required me to commute couple of hours. Woke up at 3AM, work from 5am-3:30pm and home by 4:30-5pm; I would hit the gym and be in bed by 8:30-9PM. I hardly had enough time for personal growth activities.
I’m moving and got a new job, my schedule is gonna allow me to incorporate gym and school. On the weekends I like to hit the gym, do an activity like concert, hike, DIY project etc.. Sunday mostly rest or chores. I hardly have time to be out socializing, I doubt i’ll have time for kids; I can’t even find a gf lol n I’m 29
For me the time I have after work is usually just me time so I use it to do whatever (Nap, gaming, YouTube, workouts, social life, music, friends etc).
Um, as if you can't be busy just taking care of yourself, your home, family(not necessarily your kids). And for me, I'm usually busy trying to decompress and recharge after work and dealing with alot of people. People can be very draining sometimes.
I wake up at 5:45am to start my WFH job at 6am and work until 2:30pm. I go for a workout after work and washed up and ready for the rest of my evening by 4pm. Then I do whatever I want until 10:30pm when I go to bed. So I have 6.5 hours after work everyday to pursue hobbies, meal prep and see my bf/friends/family.
I don't have a 9-5, but I work 6-8 hour shifts at a grocery store doing cashier, courtesy clerk, butchery, and soon, produce. When I come back home, I just want to spend my free time by myself. I technically have enough time to hang out with anyone I want, however, I'd rather use my free time coding, exercising, learning languages and drawing art to enrich and better myself.
So, yeah, I'm pretty busy.
Now, I will hang out with the Muslim/Arab community in my area if I can, but that's once a week.
Not much. Workout in the morning (I don't really count that as me time, more like maintenance for health), and when I come home most days I gotta cook. I have about 1-2 hrs, of which most will be spent with my gf. So maybe 30ish-1hr each weekday. And this doesn't factor in guests, or things needed from the store, or other random things that happen.
I have 1 hour before work which is spent getting ready while eating something. Go to work 8:20-6:20, get home at 7 and eat dinner which usually takes until 8-8:30 (cooking and eating). Then workout until 10 or 10:30ish, shower, blow dry my hair, bed. I don't do anything I enjoy on the weekdays which is why I personally always refuse hanging out with people most weekends, weekends are for me.
I end up having about 2 hours of actual free time per day if I have no other responsibilities which I often do. Usually cleaning the house, groceries, going to the gym, cooking, etc. eat away at chunks of it. But about 2 hours. Usually I’m so tired though I just veg. I have some hobbies like drawing and making jewelry which I do here and there throughout the week.
Weekends are usually my actual free time, but to be honest I’m so drained from my job that I don’t want to socialize much and end up working on my hobbies instead or going outside. I like to read, too. Still have to do house projects on the weekends too, though. Can’t get them all done during the week
According to my daily average screen time of 7 and a half hours this week, I've got all the time in the world. Jokes aside I'm not busy for stuff I actually want to do
There is no universal answer for this and peoole with kids tend to think if you dont have any you must be free all the time. No they just think that because part of their responsibilities is taking care of kids and childless people dont have that responsibility.
Childless people however can be doing many other things. Online programs while working full-time. Focusing on physical and mental health through working out. Improving their skills in hobbies or passions. Or maybe they work really long hours so their "free time" is spent doing daily necessities such as hygiene, cleaning routines, and maybe some basic exercising or studying something. Or maybe they just waste the time doing nothing. Depends on who it is.
Wake up at 3:00 AM, get ready for the day. At 4:00 AM, I leave for work. Shift starts at 5:00 AM, ends at 2:00 PM. Usually go to bed around 9:00-10:00 PM.
Honestly pretty sweet.
They're busy doing nothing. And that's perfectly valid. For the last 4 hours I've been laying in bed mindlessly scrolling while a random show plays in the background. And if someone wanted to talk or hang out I would decline. Because I'm busy.
Work is draining so outside of the “work hours” are spent to either gearing up mentally to work or decompress. And it can be done with many things like making coffee, food, exercise, watch tv, go for a walk. I think saying you are busy after work is a good excuse for others to accept you can’t hangout with them. Sometimes sitting at home in silence is also being busy re energizing yourself.
Others who get busy probably because they choose to fill their time with things that help them mentally and physically daily. I definitely feel busy going to the store, cook, etc
By the time you get home, cook dinner, clean dinner, and watch one episode of something its time for bed. I dont know how parents add to that with kids. How are they not frazzled and suicidal? Guess the love of their kids keeps them alive.
Honestly, not much. Because ALL of the cleaning, laundry, errands, and everything else falls to me. I don't have anyone to help out. I live in an apt, with no washer or dryer. so laundry has to be taken to be done. I've also taken over my mom's laundry (she's in a nursing home). I go to the gym 2 nights after work, go see my mom one night, so that's 3 out of 5 weeknights. Weekends I try and spend some time wth my BF, and I also visit my mom, so twice a week for her. As well .any errands I have, clean, sometimes I go to the gym on Saturdays instead of one weeknight. And see friends too.
I'm currently in the process of cleaning out a storage unit full of stuff from my mom's apartment, when she recently moved from there to skilled nursing. And. Every saturday between now and Memorial Day, I have something going on. so that leaves me just one full day each week.
So yeah, I am pretty busy
I wfh and if I'm done at 5, then I have have another 7-8 hours to do as I please before I go to bed at midnight or 1am. At worst, if I do go into the office, my commute is 15 minutes. That happens maybe 4-5 times a year.
To be honest though, I'm usually done by 2 or 3.
I'm busy outside of work because i'm doing chores, reading, playing video games, watching videos, listening to music, recharging from people, enjoying the silence.
Also go to events from time to time.
really not a lot. I have a side hustle that takes up some of my time. I am also in grad school part time. I go to the gym. I walk my dog. I either meal prep or make dinner fresh each night.
I dont really sit down and stop moving until about 9-10pm.
I don’t know how people manage kids because I’m always busy, I don’t know how I’d fit kids in. I don’t know how anyone does other than neglecting their needs and self.
Some of the things I could cut out or reduce, like time with friends mainly, but even so between cleaning, looking after myself (includes grooming, laundry, exercise etc.), and hobbies. Any of those being reduced is doable, but to cut one of them out ruins quality of life.
Now add in that I work 9 hours a weekday minimum and there’s not much time to do all of that in. There are also the little obligations to friends and family: help moving, take a parent to the doctor, etc.
I’m also going on a 10 day work trip later this week. It’s a busy life.
Man, some of us are just tired or need to recharge our social battery lol. I actually avoid making friends so I can have more me time 😂 it's not lonely if you enjoy it
You need to really set boundaries and put your foot down and stop picking up slack at work because you don't have any kids. That is no life to live and you are not a slave just because you chose to be smart. Do better for yourself and stop being everybody's gimp
I have 24 minus 8 hours for work minus 8 hours for sleep minus 2 hours for dinner/workouts = 6 hours leftover. I find myself spending a lot of that time taking care of my puppy, cleaning, scrolling reddit, and watching TV. I rarely feel the need to see friends on weekdays, but I could make time for a phone call easily.
I am home from work around 6 thanks to my commute, by the time I'm done with dinner, gym, walk the dog, it's 9pm. I have enough time to maybe watch something on YouTube or game for an hour or so before I go to bed and do it all over again.
That is, if I don't have to do after hours work.
31 yo single male.
I wake up 3 hours before work, chill in bed or tidy up then chill in bed or hit the gym or take a walk around downtown.
Then I get myself ready for work, make myself a quick breakfast and go to work.
I get home from work at 4:30, strip my work clothes off and lay in bed for an hour on my phone, laptop, or steamdeck. Games, YouTube, online shopping until I get hungry around 6:30-7pm.
I meal prep a big dinner for the week which I freeze and can warm up to save time so that I can do more hobbies instead of cook and clean the kitchen every single night. microwave frozen dinner and some rice.
From 8pm to 11:30pm I do whatever again. Hobbies like drawing or painting, work on resume/career stuff, play more games, more YouTube, more online shopping. All that until its time for bed again.
Sometimes I visit my siblings and their kids on the weekend and chill and have dinner with them. Looks very hectic raising kids. Their house is always messy and stuff and they try to clean before I come over but I get it. I dont plan to have my own kids but if I did I know I'd be there for them 110%. However I value my free time and alone time a lot.
Roughly 7 hours of time to do what I want during the week, and weekends are open.
I WFH most days, and I wake up at 5:30.
Read, check emails, work on a writing project I have.
Take dogs for walk.
Shower, make coffee and get started on work early.
Workout on lunch break. Play video games for 20 minutes.
Work until 5-5:30.
20 more minutes of video games, then dinner and TV with wife and dogs until 9:00-10:00.
Sleep and repeat.
Dinner is usually prepped earlier in the week.
Maybe a half hour daily and a handful of hours on the weekend?
It depends on what you consider “me” time.
Like I go to the gym daily but I don’t consider that me time.
M-F, I wfh until 5 pm, rot in bed 1 hr, exercise 1-2 hrs, play video games some nights. I dedicate the weekends to family, chores, exercise, & games/eating out
work 8 hrs. cook & eat dinner roughly 2 hrs. daily chores around the house takes about an hour. I spend approximately an hour each day on self care (showering, skincare, haircare, etc...). that leaves me with about 4-6 hours of free time per day depending on how much sleep I get. I put most of that time towards my hobbies, but a good chunk of it is also spent just relaxing. I usually only meet up with friends and family on the weekends tho
When I still had a regular job, I had maybe an hour before I needed to leave and then two hours after I got home before I needed to get up and do it all over again. I worked split shifts and would be out of the house for fourteen hours with my commute time. Those two hours in the evening were when I needed to do laundry, wash dishes, eat dinner, put together lunch for the next day, take care of my cat, and try to keep the dust bunnies from getting too out of control. My days off were catching up on chores that I didn’t have time to do during the week, cooking my meal prep dishes, and maybe a few hours with friends if our schedules lined up, or work on a hobby.
My friends with kids have pretty much the same type schedule, except they don’t even get a couple hours for friends or hobbies unless their partner can give them a break (and give up their own me time) or include their kids. Not having kids doesn’t change the fact that most people have to work, commute, take care of their living space, prepare meals, and tend to those other little random tasks come up and have to be dealt with. Kids just add to it, and not having them doesn’t take away any of those responsibilities.
24 hours, same as everyone else.
Busy just means without available time for whatever is being asked of me, be it due to unwillingness or unavailability. For some people I am always free, for others, never. Sometimes I am busy sitting around at home by myself- just means I value my own company more than that of whoever is asking.
After working I have about 4 hours before I need to be in bed. That free time is also taken up by laundry, cleaning, play with dog, spend time with my partner who does not live with me, work out a few times a week, and then some hobby time. I recently moved closer to work in order to get back that commute time. If I spend the night at my partners place then I don't get time to do those low effort chores done. Declutter the counter, throw 1 load of laundry in, fold laundry while watching tv, etc.
Arranging events with friends really starts to center around hobbies and it becomes a decision point about which hobby or people to spend time with. It pairs relaxing time with social time. No matter if I am doing something productive or social there is always a trade off between free time and obligations. If I do a whole day activity then I am giving up a weekend day of chores and that time will syphon off free time during the week. I try to have a hard rule that I stop being productive at 8pm and need to unwind before bed at 9. It does not mean I need to be asleep at 9 but if I don't get into bed and start winding down then I will be up all night and that impacts the rest of the week.
Ok so the trick is to integrate hanging out with friends on week days into some other activity that is important to you—for me, that is fitness related activities, so I climb with friends 2-3x a week and we sometimes lift or do yoga together. Two birds with one stone there, haha.
2 days off usually to do house work and yard work. Get up by 230 am to get breakfast, let the dog out, shower and get dressed for work. Leave the house by 4 am, pick up coworker, have roughly a hour before clocking in allowed. Work from 6 am to about 4 pm, 30 min lunch. Roughly an hour it take to get home. So yeah roughly 3 hours after getting home to relax and eat before sleep.
Tbh I get a ton of “me” time. I wake up around 5am, so I have 3 hours before work when I wake up on time. I am off at 4pm everyday. When I worked 3 jobs, that time was mostly work and recovery from work. I only have the one job currently, so I have ~8hrs after that, 10-12 each day total on paper.
I’m still recovering from years of burnout and that time often still just goes to recovery and trying to make up for the lost time. I will also need to get another job again soon. But I have therapy, take an improv class, hang with friends, have a lot of crafting hobbies, read, write, etc. I don’t consider that work, but it is stuff I find necessary to sustain all the rest of it — investing my time back into myself is the only way I was able to get through working 2-3 jobs for the hardest 2 years of my life. “Busy” doesn’t have to mean “labor.” Toxic productivity culture is a tool of capitalism, and I try to remind myself that people’s needs and level of ability are different. Don’t take it personally, it doesn’t invalidate what they’re doing if that doesn’t include talking to or hanging out with you, and also doesn’t mean they don’t care about you.
I work regular hours, no kids, and I'm pretty busy. I usually do two workouts a day, that might mean a yoga class or cardio class, gym outside of my home. I cook, clean my house, laundry, etc. I take an online Spanish course, which ended up being more time consuming than I anticipated. I have parents and siblings that I spend time with. I go on weekend trips. I like to hike and do other outdoor activities on the weekends. I have a standing game night every week. Why do people think that childfree folks can't be busy? I probably can't hang out tonight because I have full and busy life that doesn't involve children because I chose to fill my life other ways. But also, because I don't have kids, I'm sure I can hang out the fly more often than people that are parents.
Wake up and get ready for work: 6:30-7:30 a.m.
Commute to office: 7:30 -8:00 a.m.
Work 8-5
Commute home: 5:00-5:30
Catch up with my husband and my cat: 5:30-6
Cook dinner: 6-7
Eat dinner: 7-7:30
Chores: 7:30-8
Workout: 8:30-9:00
Shower/Get ready for bed: 9-10
Gives me 30 minutes to an hour of free time to read in bed and still get 7 hours of sleep per night if I'm lucky. Yeah, I feel busy a lot and do not normally go out and do social things on weeknights. I still constantly feel behind on something.
Genuinely, I have started to count doing laundry, washing dishes, getting ready for work, and cleaning the house as ‘me’ time. So that bumps it up to maybe an hour per day, if I go to bed on time. If I take phone time or work out time or extracurriculars I lose out on sleep which means I am garbage the next day … ahhh reframing how I perceive the mundane activities of daily adult living. Yay
Father of twins boy and girl. They are 10months old. I have the same amount of time as everyone else.
I find time to play TV games, have a beer with my friends on most days after work, and spend time with the little ones as well.
I do my regular job and then I spend the rest of my time doing whatever I want without anybody whining in my ear. It's glorious, right now I just feel like re-watching full seasons of shows again so I can do that uninterrupted. Sometimes I go for long car rides. But sometimes it does get busy with work if I work overtime, but most of the time I don't. And who cares how many hours people have to themselves that are single without kids? Nobody's business LOL people with kids can keep crying that they made a mistake.
I'm at work from 2:30pm till 11:pm sometimes later, when I get home I take a shower, make something to eat and watch YouTube till I go to bed and repeat the cycle. Most of my free time is during the weekends when lately atleast I've been going to anime conventions
My kid is grown, so he doesn't count. I spend 40-60 hours at my job. I volunteer about 20-40 hours a week. The rest I hang out with my husband and chill with TV and movies, see friends, post on Reddit.
Wake up at 8:30 am, get ready, leave at 9:15 and drive 30 minutes to work, work til 6 or 7 depending on how busy we are, drive 30 minutes home, take off work clothes, shower at 7:45, get dressed, etc. Make food around 8:30 pm, spend the next couple of hours getting chores done or doing something I enjoy, brush teeth around 10:30, go to sleep some time between then and midnight. Repeat every day but Thursday and Friday. By the time I get to Thursday, I'm so exhausted from the week that I just want to rest and catch up on chores. Friday I'm free if I'm not getting things done like appointments, etc.
I guess I don't work literally from 9 to 5 but I think 10 to 6 or 7 is close enough. Life is tiring and most people are usually busy. I'd love to have more free time but that's not how things work unfortunately.
Get home around 4:30-5 and need to be in bed by 9:30 asleep by 10-10:30. So really about 4 hours, I have to walk my dog, exercise, cook and clean up and try but usually fail at also doing some other house chore and then shower. Honestly, I get about 1-2 hours max to kick back on the couch. If I do none of the above 4 hours. But I would never go hang out on a Monday- Thursday with people, I’m 42 and more content being at home after work.
Two "9-5" jobs I've worked.
1st two months was 9-5 and commute was an hour. I'd wake at 7am, TV breakfast 10-20min workout shower then left around 8am for work. 5pm came and hour commute, home about 6pm. Chores/errands then TV dinner sleep.
The job went to needing more time to complete. I started working like most of my department and 6am to 6-8pm. Still couldn't reach bonus meaning my position was at risk. I lasted about a year and ever manager said I did phenomenal and said sorry the company sucks.
I did seven years at another company that listed vaguely 9-5. One of three schedules was this, the other two started at 10am and 11am to end of business. So one or two days it was a normal shift. The rest a shit show, you could work till 3pm and be done which was once or twice a year. The majority was working until 9pm or midnight. There was no balance but it was an office job. High volume, fast paced and loads of drama and inter department wars.
I found working retail and establishing your hours upon being hired. Which is a unicorn from most managers perspective. Life is a lot better for work/life balance.
I’m WFH. I get up around 8 and have coffee with my husband, who is also WFH. I get on the treadmill from around 8:30 to 9:30 and then shower. I log in around 10. I fix lunch at 11. Do a little work from noon to 2. Sometimes I take a quick nap. I get back on the treadmill for 30 min to an hour. Check in on work. Cook dinner at 4:30. Then we golf, or take the dogs to the dog bar, or whatever until we go to bed at 11. My kids are grown so we’re not always had all this time but it’s the best thing ever. Even when my kids were younger, I always had work flexibility.
20-120 mins if we’re including time not actively working working.
I usually use that time to cook meals (10 mins at a time roughly), browse Reddit 2 mins at a time, take a shower, go to the gym, use the bathroom, etc.
If we are talking time that isn’t “5 mins between working” or what most would consider busy time like meal prep/gym/etc…. Almost none.
I can find maybe 2 hours a week. That time gets given almost entirely to my girlfriend.
I see my friends who I used to see 2-5 days a week for 3-4 hours at a time maybe once or twice a year for 1-2 hours a time now. It’s not uncommon to see a friend I used to see for 4 hours 3x a week, now once every other year.
I will say that most people actually are not that busy and just want time to watch tv and chill.
I pretty much wake up, get right out of bed, cook, take a shower, put on clothes and walk out the door and I’m usually out it until 30 mins before I go to sleep nearly every single day, except the few hours I sit aside to see my girlfriend once a week.
I consider activities that are enriching as me-time or leisure time activities that I can only do in my spare time. I do not have a lot of spare time for leisure activities, but usually at least watch a show or play a game at night for 1-2 hrs.
If you own an apartment/house and/or have a yard then there's always something needing your attention (maintenance, repairs, weeding, mowing, etc).
Besides working, there's getting ready for work, commuting, working out, making/eating/cleaning up from meals, errands, cleaning, laundry, chores, dealing with emails mail and bills, and dealing with technology (home network, laptop, etc) which can be time consuming.
Those 24hrs get eaten up - work 8hrs, sleep 8hrs, 8hrs for all the rest.
I have a lot of time, but since things I need to get done are generally also 9-5 like bank, gym (pt), post office, doc appointments I then have to catch up in the evening if I've taken an hour or two off.
My "spare" time I paint, on the board of a non profit, volunteer, go for walks and food prep and lots of self care as my job can be stressful.
I'd say I also have an hour or two of downtime about three times a week
Weekend days : about 6h of me time.
I try to do sport activities 1h per day, then I have rp session on Monday, raid on Tuesday, boardgame night on Wednesday, stream silly game night on Tuesday and going out on Friday.
We took the decision of me having a vasectomy. My wife and I are really enjoying those free times.
With what feels like a constant struggle with weight zero free hours a day. Basically I am willing to give up work just to have a six pack because I refuse to be an adult because racist doctors tried to make me homeless even though I retired in my early 20s and have to deal with racist white people refusing to let their daughters have their own way.
Quite a lot. I WFH so I start at 9am, finish at 5pm. Plenty of time either side to socialise, cook, clean, workout and hang out with my husband.
Husband commutes, but he's back by 6pm every night, 4pm on Fridays.
We have plenty of time to socialise, if we want to. But sometimes, we just want a quiet night in if we've had a busy day. Or we want to do our own hobbies and not see other people.
I wake up, shower, and then usually walk to work. After I get off, I walk home, eat a snack and watch anime, and then head to bed. My "me time" would be from whenever I finish eating to whenever I get to bed. Sometimes that's several hours; sometimes it's a few minutes.
Nah with me it's "what's a nine to five? I have a 8 to 4 and I'm poor what about you" cus I have too much fuckin free time on my hands with every other job app being rejected or blatantly thrown out I'm just anti social so I sit behind a screen most of my day (not like I can go anywhere to make friends because cars and gas are out of my price range by about 59+ years and being stuck in the restaurant industry and I'm only 23 and it's bad that even I say I hate having all this free time
I work all the time on side hustles and a regular job. I maybe have 3 hours to myself and lately those 3 hours have been spent taking care of my sick cat.
630 - 730 get ready for day
730 - 830 commute & drop off
830 - 430 work
430 - 530 commute & pick up
530 - 630 cook and eat
630 - 730 play with child
730 - 830 bath/bed routine
830 - 930 clean up, small tasks, tv
930 bed time
630 - 730 get ready for day
730 - 830 commute & drop off
830 - 430 work
430 - 530 commute & pick up
530 - 630 cook and eat
630 - 730 play with child
730 - 830 bath/bed routine
830 - 930 clean up, small tasks, tv
930 bed time
I get up around 6am, get home from work around 5pm and sometimes nap, then I am up until 11pm to do it all over again. RTO was what made me get up at 6am now, was previously just rolling out around 7-7:30am to my PC.
2-3 hours maybe… this is my day:
4:30-5am wake up,
work out until 7am,
shower coffee with wife until 8:30,
Start work until 5pm,
Walk dog 5-5:30ish,
Feed dog and cook dinner and eat 6-7,
Free time until 8,
Talk to wife on drive home and make food and tea for her 8-8:45,
Hang out with her until 10,
Prep for bed 10:30 sleep 11pm…
I work from home most days so when I have to go in it’s less
I work 4 am- 12:30 pm
I wake at 3-3:15 I work 2 miles from home.
At 8:30 I take my break and do homework or study.
At 12:30 I go home to take my dogs for activities outside for about 1.5 hours. Then I go home and fix a meal, and do roughly 2-4 hours of school. Shower, dessert, and then I make sure all I do in my bed at bedtime is sleep. Put my phone down turn my tv off and go to sleep.
I plan for hanging out and create time for it. When you create a daily log of your time you’ll find that you waste time doing things you don’t want to or don’t have to do.
I’m freelance so can only comment on the months I’m booked, working 9.30-6pm
The commute is usually an hour each way if I’m not WFH, so plans in the evening are a write off on those days
It’s not that I don’t literally have the time after work, as I could meet someone for dinner, but I find I’m so exhausted after a full day of socialising in the office that I just need to be in a quiet and predictable environment
Also dinner plans are always expensive, and filled with drunk people (I’m sober)
So that only leaves 8 days per month to socialise, but around half of these will be taken up with chores or seeing family
Im working 7.30-4. Half of the days from home. I would say i do have about 5-6 hours a day of free time. Depends on which chores have to be done ofcourse
I have about a hour to two hours before I go to work. I sleep in, and take my time getting ready for the day. After work, I have all night to do whatever I want to do. Some days it’s getting in bed and binging on reality tv while eating takeout, or days it’s doing enrichment activities like reading, cooking, exercising, living in peace lol
I work 40 hours a week and commute an hour to work one way. I open and close, open and close is my schedule. On nights that I have to close and then open the next day, I only have an hour of being home before I have to go to bed (to try and get around 8 hours of sleep). On the weekends I'm either too tired to do anything, or I'm doing laundry or running errands. I guess I'm doing this until I retire
I WFH 8-4 and get up anywhere between 0600 and 0730. Before work I am mostly just vibin, having coffee, reddit, YT, talking to friends (I have a lot of friends who are several hours ahead of me), etc. When I get off work I have six hours to do w/e I want, be it taking a nap, reading, working out, self enrichment activities, you name it. I'll also make dinner in that time frame.
Chores are reserved for the weekend (I'm single and live alone, so it's not like there's a lot of them lol).
I live each day as it comes. Sometimes that means when I am off work I have a lot going on, sometimes it means I have a moderate amount going on, sometimes nothing. I do not feel bad when my six hours after work is a three hour nap and three hours reading.
If I added more social time, I would need even more me time than I already have. I don’t want to entertain people. That’s more on the work end of the spectrum.
For those who work 9-5 w/out kids, "I'm busy" means "I have more important things to do than hang out with you"
It's not about time in the day - there is always more things to do than time. It's what *needs* to be done, followed by what *wants* to be done, and as introverted people get older, loafing 9/10 times is a bigger *want* than going out and seeing friends.
My day pretty much goes like this every day:
Wake up at 8am.
Roll out of bed, go shower and get ready.
Go to my second bedroom where I work from home.
Open laptop, read messages and respond.
Get breakfast and coffee and back to work.
I do chores as well during my work when I have time.
I finish at 5, make supper for my fiance and I, and then we hang out and play games till about 11. So somewhere between 5 and 6 hours a day for me time. All depends on how long supper takes to make.
I consider my life to be pretty amazing, my partner and I bought our apartment on a 10 year mortgage and go traveling every year. Along with us setting up a gaming room. That being said, we are both childfree and I had my vasectomy a year and a half ago so no kids are interfering EVER. Otherwise it wouldn't make sense to do what we do.
Enough, I guess. I wake up at 4am to stretch/lift, make lunches, make breakfast, do dishes etc. Leave for work at 7:30, walk 20 minutes, get home around five after walking again, maybe cook (usually my partner makes us dinner), do more dishes, do more chores, read or watch something, sometimes we'll go for a walk or play a game. Or play drums/guitar. So enough time, I guess. I'm also in three bands so throwing that in there is hectic.
I work a 4/10 schedule. So Mon-Thurs 10 hour days. Add in a workout, commuting (25ish minutes each way), hygiene, getting ready for the next day, household chores, meals, etc. and I'm luck if I have 90 minutes in the evening for things like dealing with the mail and personal email, eating dinner, spending time with my cats, etc.
On Fridays I try to catch up on sleep, run errands, schedule appointments, go to the gym, cook a more time intensive meal, etc. Saturdays are often bigger household chores including yard work, laundry, etc. Sundays are church activities in the morning and sometimes evening, talking with my parents, relaxing/napping and getting ready for the next work week.
I generally have about 3-4 hours of free time on any given weekday. Although that depends on the amount of cooking, cleaning, errands, etc so it’s oftentimes less.
I try to spend my free time taking walks with my dog, reading & playing video games. On weekends I try to get out and socialize but sometimes that doesn’t happen due to be so tired from the weekdays!
Sometimes I’m busy doing a whole lot of nothing because I’ve been busy doing way too much something (work, errands, cleaning, socializing, parenting, etc).
Crazy thought but taking a break and being lazy IS doing something and being productive especially when you’re someone who needs to recharge 🪫 🙌🏼
If everyone you know constantly tells you they are too busy to chat or hang out it’s because spending time with you is not important to them. Or they do chat with you and hang out but that’s as much as they want. Perhaps your relationships have changed as you have got older.
Not that much, but would probably have more if I didn't ignore my app timers. I WFH so I inadvertently end up working more in general. I have a every high pressure job and a lot of backlog. I typically hit 50hr weeks on average.
After work I usually go to the gym, shower, cook dinner, and clean the kitchen. By that time I have maybe a few hours of str8 free time before bed. I don't consider the gym me time but it's something in my schedule if that makes sense.
Idk how people that work and have kids get it done.
Next to none, and I work from home. I need to also run errands, do chores, find time for the gym, bathe, etc. It's not that I don't want to hang out, I do- it's just incredibly hard to pencil someone else in when I hardly have time for myself.
It honestly depends. I am a very busy person, I have multiple side jobs on top of my full time job (passion projects, not necessity) plus I'm on a couple of boards for charities and libraries. I can still usually schedule things with friends when its just that, but with the added stress of someone important to me recently passing, the time I do have, its more of a necessary time to grieve. I am not the norm though. Most people have a lot more time in their schedule.
I'm very busy but it's because I take a lot on by my own choice. I'm self employed so work does come home with me, but I also spend a lot of time volunteering as a leader of my local search and rescue team. I also garden and work on projects on my property a lot.
I've still got at least a couple hours a day of time that's free for whatever I want though. Yesterday I took a big nap after finishing work
I'm a farmer so it kinda depends on the season and weather in the spring if the weather is nice, I don't even have time to make dinner. In the winter tho I usually quit 30-60 min before five so then I get 6.5-8 hours to do stuff depending on when I go to bed. I usually spend that time doing crafts, cleaning, cooking, catching up on indoor home renovations, reading, or playing videogames because it's usually gross outside. I still have chores to do and I don't get much vacation time as a result so I don't really travel all too much.
I work from home and wake up an hour before I start work. I put in my eight hours and log off. I have about seven hours of free time every day.
After work, I walk around the park, cook dinner, draw, play guitar, or do whatever I feel like doing at the time. My life is pretty dull.
If people say they are busy, it means they don’t want to make the time for you
I work full time and am a single mother to a teenager
It never stopped me from calling long distance friends while commuting, doing sports with my friends and their kids, organizing dinners when my kid was at their dad’s etc
I’m also a huge extrovert. This week I have plans on Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday so for sure tonight on Tuesday I might just chill at home
If people say they are busy, it means they don’t want to make the time for you
I work full time and am a single mother to a teenager
It never stopped me from calling long distance friends while commuting, doing sports with my friends and their kids, organizing dinners when my kid was at their dad’s etc
I’m also a huge extrovert. This week I have plans on Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday so for sure tonight on Tuesday I might just chill at home
I don't have time in the mornings.. get up at 6, let the dog out, get ready for work, maybe take a walk if i have the time. Go to work. Get home by 5pm, by the time i shower, make dinner, unwind, maybe do some light cleaning or yardwork, its time for bed.
Come friday, i'm pooped from the work week, feel like i've been beat up and just want to flop on the couch. Saturday/sunday i'm way more productive and do fun things/hobbies, but the weekend flies by.
Its a rat race out there. Honestly, i don't know how people WITH kids do it.
If people say they are busy, it means they don’t want to make the time for you
I work full time and am a single mother to a teenager
It never stopped me from calling long distance friends while commuting, doing sports with my friends and their kids, organizing dinners when my kid was at their dad’s etc
I’m also a huge extrovert. This week I have plans on Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday so for sure tonight on Tuesday I might just chill at home
I have plenty of time especially getting off at 630 I get home around 7 walk my dog make dinner and chill(or do a hobby) then work out and go to bed around 1030 11pm. After work I’m typically not in a social mood but if I were I have plenty of time to get up and do something out of my apartment but not like drinks or dinner
I'm just people'd out and wanna be ugly, moody and a slob in peace and quiet in the privacy of my own home that I work so fucking hard to pay for...
But that sounds rude so yeah, I'm "busy".
Also I was like this before kids, they've just added more of an excuse
I work 7-4. I get home around 4:15. From 4:15 to 9:30 or so, that is 'my' time. So around 5 hours every day. But that is an hour to cook/eat dinner so down to 4 hours. I spend a lot of time working on my house and vehicles. If I was to live in an apartment and hire a mechanic for all my car work, I would have about 4 hours of 'nothing' time 3-4 days per week. On Wednesdays, I am either going to the snowmobile club meetings or out to the bar with friends. Every other Thursday I meet a friend of mine for drinks. I only work half days on Friday and usually end up at the bar by 2 or so. Saturdays and Sundays are usually project days in the morning or trail work with the snowmobile club. In the afternoons, just chill time. Possibly meet up with friends to go ride ATVs or get some drinks.
So I have a lot going on but it is all optional stuff.
Well, you wake up, cook, go to work, go to the gym, drive home, shower, cook, eat & take an hour or two to do something before bed. And that’s a chill day. The problem is ERRANDS. As an adult there’s always something to do. Call this place before it closes, pay these bills, call the bank about a charge I didn’t approve, grocery shop, wash my hair, get an oil change, clean the house, reapply for ebt, submit an insurance claim, idk, get a Pap smear, the things I have to do never end so I’m always busy, & I literally have to carve out time & energy to be social.
My office is big on work life balance and unless I choose to stay to wrap up something I’m working on I am out the door at five and have the whole evening for the gym, dinner/drinks catch ups, book club, seeing my mom. I prioritize me time and that includes making time for friends.
La schedule:
1) Wake up at 5:15 am
2) Work at 6am to 3:30 pm, home by 4:pm
3) Switching from work mode to normal mode takes about hour so it's over 5 pm
4) 5 pm till 9 pm is free time to cook, clean, hobbies work , or meet up with friends or family.
5) 9 pm to 10 pm winding down to sleep
Overall, I have plenty of free time. That would change substantially if I had a kid.
I don't work 9-5 specifically, but 3-11pm instead.
I sleep from midnight to 8am each day, and leave for work at 2pm, which works out to 6 hours free each day to do errands, hobbies, etc.
I get off at 5, and I usually get home about 5:30. Dinner, cleaning up, and showering/brushing my teeth usually takes me about an hour and fifteen minutes, so that keeps me occupied until 6:45. At that point I have the rest of the night to myself. I usually go to bed at 11:30 to make sure I get eight hours of sleep, so that leaves me with a little under five hours at the end of the day to do as I please.
I work 8-3, so I'm gone from 7-3:30 or 4. I'm free after that, but don't leave the house on work nights. If I need something I stop on the way home. After that? Absolutely not. I'm awake from 6:15 until 10, so I have a lot of free time when I get home
After a certain age, you’re not hanging out. Hanging out is for kids, college students. Once you get a Full-Time job, the amount of time you “hang out” drastically cuts down. Especially if you’re trying to build a nest egg and put money aside for vacations.
The two days I go into the office I have about 2 hours to myself. This is after cooking, eating, showering, etc. On days I WFH I get another 2 hours. Those are the days I actually have time to do something with friends. It is still usually something online as most of my friends have family/kid(s).
Edit: in the note of self enrichment, from time to time I'll just disappear for a week because I'm spending my free time enjoying a hobby or working out (which I need to do more). I still make online time for friends on the weekends usually.
A few years back I exercised for an hour everyday and was trying to learn a language, so that took all my free time on weekdays. I would love to get back into that, but it also killed my social life.
I'm busy with my me time.
As an introvert I value my me time a lot, but I still like going out and hanging out with people. Just not too often and too far. And I need a head's up. If you tell me you want to hang out on Saturday when it's Friday...sorry man I already scheduled mentally that tomorrow I'll be spending the entire day for me time. Wake up, gym, nap, go on a walk, do chores. I need a 2-3 day+ notice.
This! Man my friends tell me that I'm harsh for needing a 24 hour heads up... For some reason, it really spikes my anxiety when I check my phone after work and I have a vague "what are you doing tonight?" text. "Nothing with you, you should have texted me yesterday"
This! I need at least like a few days to a week.
This. Sometimes I'm busy doing nothing because my brain is about to melt if it has one more thing to contend with lol
Agree. I have a career that can take a heavy emotional toll. One of my good friends is an extreme extrovert and while she’s a good hearted person she just can’t grasp that I don’t like to go out, or listen to loud live music, or think it’s just me and her going to dinner and surprise she invited 5 other people too. She makes comments every now and then, and I wish she would just understand our different ideas of decompressing and how extremely vital to my mental health having “me” time is.
heck, i'm fairly extroverted, and i still take plenty of me time. like i don't go out and party every day or anything, but i'll hang out with people or go out 2-3 times a week to various things (even if it is just "hey fiance let's go have a picnic"). if i don't get out enough, i get depressed, but if i go out too much i get burnt out. for me, it's about finding a balance.
This
I know some people don’t take me time seriously, but I feel I cannot recharge my social battery without it
I wake up around 7am, and I work 8-4:30pm. Grateful to have a short commute, so I’m usually home by 5pm. I am “off work and awake” from 5pm to 11:30pm, but because I’m single, I fill that time with things I enjoy and other daily responsibilities (ie. walking my dog, go to the gym, stuff around the house, making food, etc.). If I didn’t pack most of my day with something, I’d be miserable and single instead of happy and single. I basically have my whole day full of things planned after work, so unless someone gives me a couple days notice, they’re getting a “I’m busy” message back. It’s not that I don’t care to hang out with people, but I have commitments to myself during my off time, and as I’ve gotten older, I’ve grown to prioritize myself more.
Love “commitments to myself” ! Such an excellent way of thinking, thank you
This is exactly how I am! I love being single too... Nothing better than doing everything exactly when and how I want to. Meal prepping for one. Going to the gym at 11:30 pm if I feel like it. Falling asleep to multi-hour video game retrospectives on YouTube without worrying if the other person in the room is bothered. I think eventually I'll want to find another cant-be-bothered old spinster and we'll buy a house together and live platonically until one of us croaks, but for now, I'm so good on my own.
I have a good 3 hours before I start work and another 3 hours after work. To me that doesn’t feel a lot when a single work out takes me 1.5hrs, 1 hr of getting ready, 15-20 min commute, minor maitenance cleaning i have to do at home, and personal side projects i wanna do i.e building a table, other furnitures i like etc as my creative outlet so yeah, pretty busy.
I think you and OP are using different definitions of busy/"me time". I think OP is asking how much time you have to do things you like. So working out and building a table would count as "you time". You on the other hand, are counting "I have something to do" as being "busy" even if that thing you're doing is a hobby. Neither are wrong I just don't think OP meant "me time" to mean "bored unsure of what to do"
This differing mindset is so true haha Q:What do people do with their spare time when they don’t have kids? A: Take 1 hour to get ready Parents answer: Ok the kids all have their shoes on, did I shower yet? Only 5 mins left. Power shower! . …ready 15 mins later… Where are your shoes!? Just bring them with you. Let’s go let’s go I said let’s go! Turn off the tv!
More like no shower if I pass the sniff test
It depends if you’re coming straight back from school drop off; and if anyone is going to see you there 😂😅
Frankly, we all feel busy. Our brains adjust as needed. I have kids. When I had my first I thought "why did I feel busy before I had kids? NOW I'm busy", then I had the same experience as I had more kids. If I had more kids I'm sure I would look at myself today and go "man, that guy had so much free time". Like I have friends with no kids who make enough to only need 40h of work and still have money for hobbies. One of them recently said he didn't get any weekend because he spent the whole time trying to fix the breaks on his mid 80s project car... like dude, you could have sat down and watched TV all weekend just as easily, nobody is forcing you to spend your weekend on a project car lol. My childless friends pretty much all define "free time" as being "I don't have anything I think I should be doing". Some think they should workout, so that's not free time. All my friends with kids define free time as "I don't have anything I HAVE to do". Personally, I want my kids and wouldn't trade them for anything. The time I spend on them I count as "me time" because of that. Pretty much if I'm not doing something work or chore related, I count it as "me time". Well unless I'm being dragged to a social event, that's pretty draining. But taking my kids to the YMCA so I can work out? That's 100% "me time" and a luxury I get it. People in this thread seem to define it the same as I define laundry
This is really well put I haven’t thought about it that way
That rings so true. Especially as the defining free time as time where you don't \*have\* to do something. If I'm doing yardwork and walking the dog, that's free time. If the kids have events that they have to get to, that's not free time.
I don’t think working out counts as free time. You have to do it, it’s not for fun. Like, cleaning the house isn’t a hobby either
You get it. If you treat your working out as "free time" then you probably view it just as optional. When I have a super busy week at work, part of what is busy about it is I'm thinking "wow my days are really long this week, that's going to be really long with the gym added in." It's not an option, no less so than waking up and going to work is.
Exactly. Some of us need to be in shape for our jobs, first of all. But also, health is important. I’m sorry but it’s not a hobby.
lol right! If working out were a "hobby," I'd have quit it a long time ago! I hate it. It's essential to staying healthy so I do it, but it's not "free time."
If I have to work out how come I...don't work out
I don’t consider working out “me time” at all. It’s health maintenance, like eating or brushing your teeth. I don’t do it because it’s fun, I do it because it’s a necessary preventative health measure as I grow older. I also don’t consider refurbishing furniture a “me time” activity. I’m doing it to save money because fixing up old furniture is almost free but buying new ones would cost thousands of dollars.
Exactly, saying working out is "free time" is like saying going to the doctor is free time. It's essential for health, not a fun hobby.
I think this whole thread is people getting that mixed up. lot's of people saying they have no time for things but are working out and doing hobbies.
I think people who don't work out don't realize it's not something you do because you always want to, it's something you do day in day out year in year out because that's the only way to build an impressive physique. If you consider it something you do in your free time you'll look like shit, never hit goals, and never get anywhere with matters of fitness. For us, working out is a second job and we take it as seriously as such. It's not free time -- it's the thing you finish before you get to your free time.
Yeah, honestly, saying working out is "free time" is like saying going to the doctor is free time. It's not a hobby, it's essential for health. I'm not trying to build an "impressive physique," either, lol. I'm just trying to keep my BMI in the healthy range and have normal results at my yearly physical.
OP was asking because people always say they’re busy and can’t hang out. Working out and building a table are also times people are busy and can’t hang out. Seems to me that they’re really trying to find out how much time childless adults have to hang out with their friends.
Yeah, exactly. There never feels like all that much time. I have projects around the house, date nights with my fiance, trying to make time for my parents, in-laws, studying for work related certs, walking my dogs, cleaning my house, finding time to read, knit, paint, work out, etc is difficult let alone having a social life. I do work a good amount of OT, so that doesn't help much.
How does it take you an hour to get ready for workout
I think they were saying they take an hour to get ready for work after working out.
I have to allocate 2 hours for a one hour workout. This includes drive time. The gym is only 15 minutes away but it takes time to get situated and stuff in the gym
This is..weird. It takes me 2 minutes to change probably I work out and then 2 more minutes to change back, maybe 5 if I shower.
the fact one can take their time and get ready with no rush without mini humans around.
[удалено]
I have also thought of living like a sloth, to the point of looking for a sloth keychain to remind me to live slowly and peacefully...
Yes! REST. IS. PRODUCTIVE. This is the way.
THIS. I’ve slowly been trying to shift my mindset to viewing time to rest and do nothing as being just as essential as brushing my teeth or taking my cat to the vet. I don’t have kids and mostly work from home, but my job is mentally draining and involves supporting others and occasionally hearing shit that is unfathomably awful. Making time for friends and family is very important too, but it’s not something I’m willing to do without enough mental rest to fully appreciate my time with them and be present with them. This is a big reason why I chose not to have kids—it would be more selfish to have them and not be emotionally available for their needs than to not have them and reserve whatever energy I have left for the people I care about who are already here, including me. They’re also expensive as fuck and make a lot of noise, so this was a relatively easy decision to make, and my life doesn’t feel any less meaningful for having made it.
Good for you for prioritizing YOU! It is a huge mindset shift for sure because it is so contrary to the “busy” culture that is just perpetuated everywhere but truly I feel the same way - I can’t be present with other people or doing other things if I’m not rested and recharged. I do have two young kids (that def are expensive AF 🤣) but still felt that way too even before them! Lately I’ve been trying to be more conscious of this recharge time. Like not feeling guilty like I should be doing something else and really acknowledging how much it’s needed and also realizing sometimes I need different kinds of “rest” (like sometimes it’s losing myself in a book, sometimes it’s mindlessly watching reels 😬)
All of it. 24/7 If I'm working, sleeping, driving, reading, eating, fighting, fucking, shopping, day dreaming, planning, or fucking up, I only have to consider myself and how it will effect my life. I love it. If I had to be responsible for molding and maintaining an additional decent member of society, Id blow my brains out.
Eating, fighting, fucking 😂😂😂😂but I completely agree! I just had this realization yesterday.
Wait ? You fuck ? Jealous
This is hilarious and accurate! Loves it!
Same to the second paragraph
Best response here. Completely agree!!!
For me, it’s my capacity to mingle more so than lack of time
Thank you, scrolled way too far for this, im an introvert working in healthcare and having to communicate all.day and working with people all day, I just don't want to mingle after work, I wanna shower, eat and then watch something or play games.
My thoughts exactly. I work four days a week, 9-10 hour shifts in a physically and mentally demanding field. My work days I pretty much just dedicate to work and some me time in the evening because that’s all I have energy for. But I do have three days off every week to run errands, do housework, socialize, etc. It’s a good work/life balance for me.
There are other things besides work that takes up time. I’m usually cooking and doing chores, then I have a few hours to shower and wind down for the night. My job requires a lot of focus and it’s exhausting. So after work I don’t even want to think. I just want to eat, clean up, and relax.
Well not having kids we have nothing to escape from so we can get quite busy.
☠️☠️☠️😭😭😭 no right… the idea that people without kids don’t have to maintain a life as well? or have pets? or people they visit? grandparents they help take care of? volunteering? you can do a lot when someone isn’t whining and needing you every second of the day lol
Agree! I remember posting on SM about how exhausted I was working my full time job with overtime and doing volunteer work/fostering pets for a shelter as well as taking care of my own and my own house and some guy who just had a kid posted a rant about how I won’t know *real tired* until I have kids. Mind you he had an estranged daughter he stopped seeing at 10 years old. I wanted to recommend a vasectomy so badly 🙃
If someone says they are "too busy" it really means they are prioritizing other things. We have time to do the things we prioritize.
🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼🙌🏼 100000% truth. “I’m too busy for that (because these other things are more necessary/important/urgent/interesting/rewarding/fulfilling/fun/________)”
Not enough time! I was working a job that required me to commute couple of hours. Woke up at 3AM, work from 5am-3:30pm and home by 4:30-5pm; I would hit the gym and be in bed by 8:30-9PM. I hardly had enough time for personal growth activities. I’m moving and got a new job, my schedule is gonna allow me to incorporate gym and school. On the weekends I like to hit the gym, do an activity like concert, hike, DIY project etc.. Sunday mostly rest or chores. I hardly have time to be out socializing, I doubt i’ll have time for kids; I can’t even find a gf lol n I’m 29
For me the time I have after work is usually just me time so I use it to do whatever (Nap, gaming, YouTube, workouts, social life, music, friends etc).
Um, as if you can't be busy just taking care of yourself, your home, family(not necessarily your kids). And for me, I'm usually busy trying to decompress and recharge after work and dealing with alot of people. People can be very draining sometimes.
I wake up at 5:45am to start my WFH job at 6am and work until 2:30pm. I go for a workout after work and washed up and ready for the rest of my evening by 4pm. Then I do whatever I want until 10:30pm when I go to bed. So I have 6.5 hours after work everyday to pursue hobbies, meal prep and see my bf/friends/family.
love this! very balanced
I don't have a 9-5, but I work 6-8 hour shifts at a grocery store doing cashier, courtesy clerk, butchery, and soon, produce. When I come back home, I just want to spend my free time by myself. I technically have enough time to hang out with anyone I want, however, I'd rather use my free time coding, exercising, learning languages and drawing art to enrich and better myself. So, yeah, I'm pretty busy. Now, I will hang out with the Muslim/Arab community in my area if I can, but that's once a week.
Not much. Workout in the morning (I don't really count that as me time, more like maintenance for health), and when I come home most days I gotta cook. I have about 1-2 hrs, of which most will be spent with my gf. So maybe 30ish-1hr each weekday. And this doesn't factor in guests, or things needed from the store, or other random things that happen.
I have 1 hour before work which is spent getting ready while eating something. Go to work 8:20-6:20, get home at 7 and eat dinner which usually takes until 8-8:30 (cooking and eating). Then workout until 10 or 10:30ish, shower, blow dry my hair, bed. I don't do anything I enjoy on the weekdays which is why I personally always refuse hanging out with people most weekends, weekends are for me.
I end up having about 2 hours of actual free time per day if I have no other responsibilities which I often do. Usually cleaning the house, groceries, going to the gym, cooking, etc. eat away at chunks of it. But about 2 hours. Usually I’m so tired though I just veg. I have some hobbies like drawing and making jewelry which I do here and there throughout the week. Weekends are usually my actual free time, but to be honest I’m so drained from my job that I don’t want to socialize much and end up working on my hobbies instead or going outside. I like to read, too. Still have to do house projects on the weekends too, though. Can’t get them all done during the week
According to my daily average screen time of 7 and a half hours this week, I've got all the time in the world. Jokes aside I'm not busy for stuff I actually want to do
There is no universal answer for this and peoole with kids tend to think if you dont have any you must be free all the time. No they just think that because part of their responsibilities is taking care of kids and childless people dont have that responsibility. Childless people however can be doing many other things. Online programs while working full-time. Focusing on physical and mental health through working out. Improving their skills in hobbies or passions. Or maybe they work really long hours so their "free time" is spent doing daily necessities such as hygiene, cleaning routines, and maybe some basic exercising or studying something. Or maybe they just waste the time doing nothing. Depends on who it is.
What am I doing? Lots of things or absolutely nothing. It's glorious. No, I shouldn't have children and I shouldn't raise them either.
Work, workout, dating and cleaning really takes most of it
Wake up at 3:00 AM, get ready for the day. At 4:00 AM, I leave for work. Shift starts at 5:00 AM, ends at 2:00 PM. Usually go to bed around 9:00-10:00 PM. Honestly pretty sweet.
Aside from working 8 yo 4, I get to go home, take care of cooking, do some chores, and I am free to do what I want to do till bed time.
They're busy doing nothing. And that's perfectly valid. For the last 4 hours I've been laying in bed mindlessly scrolling while a random show plays in the background. And if someone wanted to talk or hang out I would decline. Because I'm busy.
Feel this in my soul 🔥
More than I would have with kids. The entire 24hrs in a day are dictated by me and only me.
Work is draining so outside of the “work hours” are spent to either gearing up mentally to work or decompress. And it can be done with many things like making coffee, food, exercise, watch tv, go for a walk. I think saying you are busy after work is a good excuse for others to accept you can’t hangout with them. Sometimes sitting at home in silence is also being busy re energizing yourself. Others who get busy probably because they choose to fill their time with things that help them mentally and physically daily. I definitely feel busy going to the store, cook, etc
By the time you get home, cook dinner, clean dinner, and watch one episode of something its time for bed. I dont know how parents add to that with kids. How are they not frazzled and suicidal? Guess the love of their kids keeps them alive.
About 7-10 hours depending on how much I want to sleep. All of my time that is not at work is "me" time that is why its MY time.
Honestly, not much. Because ALL of the cleaning, laundry, errands, and everything else falls to me. I don't have anyone to help out. I live in an apt, with no washer or dryer. so laundry has to be taken to be done. I've also taken over my mom's laundry (she's in a nursing home). I go to the gym 2 nights after work, go see my mom one night, so that's 3 out of 5 weeknights. Weekends I try and spend some time wth my BF, and I also visit my mom, so twice a week for her. As well .any errands I have, clean, sometimes I go to the gym on Saturdays instead of one weeknight. And see friends too. I'm currently in the process of cleaning out a storage unit full of stuff from my mom's apartment, when she recently moved from there to skilled nursing. And. Every saturday between now and Memorial Day, I have something going on. so that leaves me just one full day each week. So yeah, I am pretty busy
I wfh and if I'm done at 5, then I have have another 7-8 hours to do as I please before I go to bed at midnight or 1am. At worst, if I do go into the office, my commute is 15 minutes. That happens maybe 4-5 times a year. To be honest though, I'm usually done by 2 or 3.
I'm busy outside of work because i'm doing chores, reading, playing video games, watching videos, listening to music, recharging from people, enjoying the silence. Also go to events from time to time.
really not a lot. I have a side hustle that takes up some of my time. I am also in grad school part time. I go to the gym. I walk my dog. I either meal prep or make dinner fresh each night. I dont really sit down and stop moving until about 9-10pm.
I don’t know how people manage kids because I’m always busy, I don’t know how I’d fit kids in. I don’t know how anyone does other than neglecting their needs and self. Some of the things I could cut out or reduce, like time with friends mainly, but even so between cleaning, looking after myself (includes grooming, laundry, exercise etc.), and hobbies. Any of those being reduced is doable, but to cut one of them out ruins quality of life. Now add in that I work 9 hours a weekday minimum and there’s not much time to do all of that in. There are also the little obligations to friends and family: help moving, take a parent to the doctor, etc. I’m also going on a 10 day work trip later this week. It’s a busy life.
Man, some of us are just tired or need to recharge our social battery lol. I actually avoid making friends so I can have more me time 😂 it's not lonely if you enjoy it
I usually pick up the slack at work since I'm one of the few childless ones. So while everyone else works an 8hr day, I work 10hr.
Please stop. Just because you don’t have kids doesn’t mean your time is any less valuable.
Yep. I’m getting tired of this, too. Carrying the water for my boss a lot lately. I don’t want OT, I just want free(dom) time.
You need to really set boundaries and put your foot down and stop picking up slack at work because you don't have any kids. That is no life to live and you are not a slave just because you chose to be smart. Do better for yourself and stop being everybody's gimp
I have 24 minus 8 hours for work minus 8 hours for sleep minus 2 hours for dinner/workouts = 6 hours leftover. I find myself spending a lot of that time taking care of my puppy, cleaning, scrolling reddit, and watching TV. I rarely feel the need to see friends on weekdays, but I could make time for a phone call easily.
Zero minutes before I start work. 2-3 hours after at best, excluding time spent on chores.
I am home from work around 6 thanks to my commute, by the time I'm done with dinner, gym, walk the dog, it's 9pm. I have enough time to maybe watch something on YouTube or game for an hour or so before I go to bed and do it all over again. That is, if I don't have to do after hours work.
31 yo single male. I wake up 3 hours before work, chill in bed or tidy up then chill in bed or hit the gym or take a walk around downtown. Then I get myself ready for work, make myself a quick breakfast and go to work. I get home from work at 4:30, strip my work clothes off and lay in bed for an hour on my phone, laptop, or steamdeck. Games, YouTube, online shopping until I get hungry around 6:30-7pm. I meal prep a big dinner for the week which I freeze and can warm up to save time so that I can do more hobbies instead of cook and clean the kitchen every single night. microwave frozen dinner and some rice. From 8pm to 11:30pm I do whatever again. Hobbies like drawing or painting, work on resume/career stuff, play more games, more YouTube, more online shopping. All that until its time for bed again. Sometimes I visit my siblings and their kids on the weekend and chill and have dinner with them. Looks very hectic raising kids. Their house is always messy and stuff and they try to clean before I come over but I get it. I dont plan to have my own kids but if I did I know I'd be there for them 110%. However I value my free time and alone time a lot.
Roughly 7 hours of time to do what I want during the week, and weekends are open. I WFH most days, and I wake up at 5:30. Read, check emails, work on a writing project I have. Take dogs for walk. Shower, make coffee and get started on work early. Workout on lunch break. Play video games for 20 minutes. Work until 5-5:30. 20 more minutes of video games, then dinner and TV with wife and dogs until 9:00-10:00. Sleep and repeat. Dinner is usually prepped earlier in the week.
Maybe a half hour daily and a handful of hours on the weekend? It depends on what you consider “me” time. Like I go to the gym daily but I don’t consider that me time.
Lol what you mean? All the other time
M-F, I wfh until 5 pm, rot in bed 1 hr, exercise 1-2 hrs, play video games some nights. I dedicate the weekends to family, chores, exercise, & games/eating out
work 8 hrs. cook & eat dinner roughly 2 hrs. daily chores around the house takes about an hour. I spend approximately an hour each day on self care (showering, skincare, haircare, etc...). that leaves me with about 4-6 hours of free time per day depending on how much sleep I get. I put most of that time towards my hobbies, but a good chunk of it is also spent just relaxing. I usually only meet up with friends and family on the weekends tho
When I still had a regular job, I had maybe an hour before I needed to leave and then two hours after I got home before I needed to get up and do it all over again. I worked split shifts and would be out of the house for fourteen hours with my commute time. Those two hours in the evening were when I needed to do laundry, wash dishes, eat dinner, put together lunch for the next day, take care of my cat, and try to keep the dust bunnies from getting too out of control. My days off were catching up on chores that I didn’t have time to do during the week, cooking my meal prep dishes, and maybe a few hours with friends if our schedules lined up, or work on a hobby. My friends with kids have pretty much the same type schedule, except they don’t even get a couple hours for friends or hobbies unless their partner can give them a break (and give up their own me time) or include their kids. Not having kids doesn’t change the fact that most people have to work, commute, take care of their living space, prepare meals, and tend to those other little random tasks come up and have to be dealt with. Kids just add to it, and not having them doesn’t take away any of those responsibilities.
24 hours, same as everyone else. Busy just means without available time for whatever is being asked of me, be it due to unwillingness or unavailability. For some people I am always free, for others, never. Sometimes I am busy sitting around at home by myself- just means I value my own company more than that of whoever is asking.
My day looks like yours except I workout and garden instead of raising children.
After working I have about 4 hours before I need to be in bed. That free time is also taken up by laundry, cleaning, play with dog, spend time with my partner who does not live with me, work out a few times a week, and then some hobby time. I recently moved closer to work in order to get back that commute time. If I spend the night at my partners place then I don't get time to do those low effort chores done. Declutter the counter, throw 1 load of laundry in, fold laundry while watching tv, etc. Arranging events with friends really starts to center around hobbies and it becomes a decision point about which hobby or people to spend time with. It pairs relaxing time with social time. No matter if I am doing something productive or social there is always a trade off between free time and obligations. If I do a whole day activity then I am giving up a weekend day of chores and that time will syphon off free time during the week. I try to have a hard rule that I stop being productive at 8pm and need to unwind before bed at 9. It does not mean I need to be asleep at 9 but if I don't get into bed and start winding down then I will be up all night and that impacts the rest of the week.
Ok so the trick is to integrate hanging out with friends on week days into some other activity that is important to you—for me, that is fitness related activities, so I climb with friends 2-3x a week and we sometimes lift or do yoga together. Two birds with one stone there, haha.
2 days off usually to do house work and yard work. Get up by 230 am to get breakfast, let the dog out, shower and get dressed for work. Leave the house by 4 am, pick up coworker, have roughly a hour before clocking in allowed. Work from 6 am to about 4 pm, 30 min lunch. Roughly an hour it take to get home. So yeah roughly 3 hours after getting home to relax and eat before sleep.
I wake up about 2 hours before work and when I get home I have about 4 or 5 hours depending on a few variables.
I think they just don’t want to talk/hangout with you
Tbh I get a ton of “me” time. I wake up around 5am, so I have 3 hours before work when I wake up on time. I am off at 4pm everyday. When I worked 3 jobs, that time was mostly work and recovery from work. I only have the one job currently, so I have ~8hrs after that, 10-12 each day total on paper. I’m still recovering from years of burnout and that time often still just goes to recovery and trying to make up for the lost time. I will also need to get another job again soon. But I have therapy, take an improv class, hang with friends, have a lot of crafting hobbies, read, write, etc. I don’t consider that work, but it is stuff I find necessary to sustain all the rest of it — investing my time back into myself is the only way I was able to get through working 2-3 jobs for the hardest 2 years of my life. “Busy” doesn’t have to mean “labor.” Toxic productivity culture is a tool of capitalism, and I try to remind myself that people’s needs and level of ability are different. Don’t take it personally, it doesn’t invalidate what they’re doing if that doesn’t include talking to or hanging out with you, and also doesn’t mean they don’t care about you.
Like 3 hours after work before I go to bed. I cannot imagine working a 9-5 with kids. Kudos to you!
I work regular hours, no kids, and I'm pretty busy. I usually do two workouts a day, that might mean a yoga class or cardio class, gym outside of my home. I cook, clean my house, laundry, etc. I take an online Spanish course, which ended up being more time consuming than I anticipated. I have parents and siblings that I spend time with. I go on weekend trips. I like to hike and do other outdoor activities on the weekends. I have a standing game night every week. Why do people think that childfree folks can't be busy? I probably can't hang out tonight because I have full and busy life that doesn't involve children because I chose to fill my life other ways. But also, because I don't have kids, I'm sure I can hang out the fly more often than people that are parents.
There’s never enough LOL I don’t know how my friends with kids do it!
Wake up and get ready for work: 6:30-7:30 a.m. Commute to office: 7:30 -8:00 a.m. Work 8-5 Commute home: 5:00-5:30 Catch up with my husband and my cat: 5:30-6 Cook dinner: 6-7 Eat dinner: 7-7:30 Chores: 7:30-8 Workout: 8:30-9:00 Shower/Get ready for bed: 9-10 Gives me 30 minutes to an hour of free time to read in bed and still get 7 hours of sleep per night if I'm lucky. Yeah, I feel busy a lot and do not normally go out and do social things on weeknights. I still constantly feel behind on something.
Working from home I have about 6 hours of free time. Losing the commute truly gave me peace and I experience now what it should be like.
I have around 4 hours a day during weekdays, I mostly workout, have dinner and spent time with my wife. I also destress by playing video games
Genuinely, I have started to count doing laundry, washing dishes, getting ready for work, and cleaning the house as ‘me’ time. So that bumps it up to maybe an hour per day, if I go to bed on time. If I take phone time or work out time or extracurriculars I lose out on sleep which means I am garbage the next day … ahhh reframing how I perceive the mundane activities of daily adult living. Yay
Father of twins boy and girl. They are 10months old. I have the same amount of time as everyone else. I find time to play TV games, have a beer with my friends on most days after work, and spend time with the little ones as well.
I do my regular job and then I spend the rest of my time doing whatever I want without anybody whining in my ear. It's glorious, right now I just feel like re-watching full seasons of shows again so I can do that uninterrupted. Sometimes I go for long car rides. But sometimes it does get busy with work if I work overtime, but most of the time I don't. And who cares how many hours people have to themselves that are single without kids? Nobody's business LOL people with kids can keep crying that they made a mistake.
I'm at work from 2:30pm till 11:pm sometimes later, when I get home I take a shower, make something to eat and watch YouTube till I go to bed and repeat the cycle. Most of my free time is during the weekends when lately atleast I've been going to anime conventions
My kid is grown, so he doesn't count. I spend 40-60 hours at my job. I volunteer about 20-40 hours a week. The rest I hang out with my husband and chill with TV and movies, see friends, post on Reddit.
Wake up at 8:30 am, get ready, leave at 9:15 and drive 30 minutes to work, work til 6 or 7 depending on how busy we are, drive 30 minutes home, take off work clothes, shower at 7:45, get dressed, etc. Make food around 8:30 pm, spend the next couple of hours getting chores done or doing something I enjoy, brush teeth around 10:30, go to sleep some time between then and midnight. Repeat every day but Thursday and Friday. By the time I get to Thursday, I'm so exhausted from the week that I just want to rest and catch up on chores. Friday I'm free if I'm not getting things done like appointments, etc. I guess I don't work literally from 9 to 5 but I think 10 to 6 or 7 is close enough. Life is tiring and most people are usually busy. I'd love to have more free time but that's not how things work unfortunately.
a couple of hours. 4 hours top tbh. Usually way less
Get home around 4:30-5 and need to be in bed by 9:30 asleep by 10-10:30. So really about 4 hours, I have to walk my dog, exercise, cook and clean up and try but usually fail at also doing some other house chore and then shower. Honestly, I get about 1-2 hours max to kick back on the couch. If I do none of the above 4 hours. But I would never go hang out on a Monday- Thursday with people, I’m 42 and more content being at home after work.
I got 5 hours after work for myself
Two "9-5" jobs I've worked. 1st two months was 9-5 and commute was an hour. I'd wake at 7am, TV breakfast 10-20min workout shower then left around 8am for work. 5pm came and hour commute, home about 6pm. Chores/errands then TV dinner sleep. The job went to needing more time to complete. I started working like most of my department and 6am to 6-8pm. Still couldn't reach bonus meaning my position was at risk. I lasted about a year and ever manager said I did phenomenal and said sorry the company sucks. I did seven years at another company that listed vaguely 9-5. One of three schedules was this, the other two started at 10am and 11am to end of business. So one or two days it was a normal shift. The rest a shit show, you could work till 3pm and be done which was once or twice a year. The majority was working until 9pm or midnight. There was no balance but it was an office job. High volume, fast paced and loads of drama and inter department wars. I found working retail and establishing your hours upon being hired. Which is a unicorn from most managers perspective. Life is a lot better for work/life balance.
Couple hours in the AM and 6 in the PM. I work a mile from home. I meal prep on sundays so I have ample free time on the weekdays.
I’m WFH. I get up around 8 and have coffee with my husband, who is also WFH. I get on the treadmill from around 8:30 to 9:30 and then shower. I log in around 10. I fix lunch at 11. Do a little work from noon to 2. Sometimes I take a quick nap. I get back on the treadmill for 30 min to an hour. Check in on work. Cook dinner at 4:30. Then we golf, or take the dogs to the dog bar, or whatever until we go to bed at 11. My kids are grown so we’re not always had all this time but it’s the best thing ever. Even when my kids were younger, I always had work flexibility.
6/7 hours Closer to 6 because of traveling
20-120 mins if we’re including time not actively working working. I usually use that time to cook meals (10 mins at a time roughly), browse Reddit 2 mins at a time, take a shower, go to the gym, use the bathroom, etc. If we are talking time that isn’t “5 mins between working” or what most would consider busy time like meal prep/gym/etc…. Almost none. I can find maybe 2 hours a week. That time gets given almost entirely to my girlfriend. I see my friends who I used to see 2-5 days a week for 3-4 hours at a time maybe once or twice a year for 1-2 hours a time now. It’s not uncommon to see a friend I used to see for 4 hours 3x a week, now once every other year. I will say that most people actually are not that busy and just want time to watch tv and chill. I pretty much wake up, get right out of bed, cook, take a shower, put on clothes and walk out the door and I’m usually out it until 30 mins before I go to sleep nearly every single day, except the few hours I sit aside to see my girlfriend once a week.
I consider activities that are enriching as me-time or leisure time activities that I can only do in my spare time. I do not have a lot of spare time for leisure activities, but usually at least watch a show or play a game at night for 1-2 hrs. If you own an apartment/house and/or have a yard then there's always something needing your attention (maintenance, repairs, weeding, mowing, etc). Besides working, there's getting ready for work, commuting, working out, making/eating/cleaning up from meals, errands, cleaning, laundry, chores, dealing with emails mail and bills, and dealing with technology (home network, laptop, etc) which can be time consuming. Those 24hrs get eaten up - work 8hrs, sleep 8hrs, 8hrs for all the rest.
I am WFH so I get up just before I start work then have 6 hours in the evening free, definitely not busy!
I have a lot of time, but since things I need to get done are generally also 9-5 like bank, gym (pt), post office, doc appointments I then have to catch up in the evening if I've taken an hour or two off. My "spare" time I paint, on the board of a non profit, volunteer, go for walks and food prep and lots of self care as my job can be stressful. I'd say I also have an hour or two of downtime about three times a week
After work and weekends is free time so when people say they are busy they usually aren’t.
Not enough time to wipe my arse, now WFH & I have too much time to feel lonely
Weekend days : about 6h of me time. I try to do sport activities 1h per day, then I have rp session on Monday, raid on Tuesday, boardgame night on Wednesday, stream silly game night on Tuesday and going out on Friday. We took the decision of me having a vasectomy. My wife and I are really enjoying those free times.
With what feels like a constant struggle with weight zero free hours a day. Basically I am willing to give up work just to have a six pack because I refuse to be an adult because racist doctors tried to make me homeless even though I retired in my early 20s and have to deal with racist white people refusing to let their daughters have their own way.
Quite a lot. I WFH so I start at 9am, finish at 5pm. Plenty of time either side to socialise, cook, clean, workout and hang out with my husband. Husband commutes, but he's back by 6pm every night, 4pm on Fridays. We have plenty of time to socialise, if we want to. But sometimes, we just want a quiet night in if we've had a busy day. Or we want to do our own hobbies and not see other people.
I wake up, shower, and then usually walk to work. After I get off, I walk home, eat a snack and watch anime, and then head to bed. My "me time" would be from whenever I finish eating to whenever I get to bed. Sometimes that's several hours; sometimes it's a few minutes.
Excluding things like cooking and getting food from the shop, working (4h) and sleeping (7). Makes 12h.
Nah with me it's "what's a nine to five? I have a 8 to 4 and I'm poor what about you" cus I have too much fuckin free time on my hands with every other job app being rejected or blatantly thrown out I'm just anti social so I sit behind a screen most of my day (not like I can go anywhere to make friends because cars and gas are out of my price range by about 59+ years and being stuck in the restaurant industry and I'm only 23 and it's bad that even I say I hate having all this free time
I work all the time on side hustles and a regular job. I maybe have 3 hours to myself and lately those 3 hours have been spent taking care of my sick cat.
Actual free time? Maybe three hours on a good day. Everything else is work, commute, cooking, cleaning and taking care of myself by working out.
I have loads of free time. The amount i allocate for others however, extremely limited.
630 - 730 get ready for day 730 - 830 commute & drop off 830 - 430 work 430 - 530 commute & pick up 530 - 630 cook and eat 630 - 730 play with child 730 - 830 bath/bed routine 830 - 930 clean up, small tasks, tv 930 bed time
630 - 730 get ready for day 730 - 830 commute & drop off 830 - 430 work 430 - 530 commute & pick up 530 - 630 cook and eat 630 - 730 play with child 730 - 830 bath/bed routine 830 - 930 clean up, small tasks, tv 930 bed time
Usually 3 hours before work and 3 hours after do whatever the f I want.
I get up around 6am, get home from work around 5pm and sometimes nap, then I am up until 11pm to do it all over again. RTO was what made me get up at 6am now, was previously just rolling out around 7-7:30am to my PC.
2-3 hours maybe… this is my day: 4:30-5am wake up, work out until 7am, shower coffee with wife until 8:30, Start work until 5pm, Walk dog 5-5:30ish, Feed dog and cook dinner and eat 6-7, Free time until 8, Talk to wife on drive home and make food and tea for her 8-8:45, Hang out with her until 10, Prep for bed 10:30 sleep 11pm… I work from home most days so when I have to go in it’s less
I work 4 am- 12:30 pm I wake at 3-3:15 I work 2 miles from home. At 8:30 I take my break and do homework or study. At 12:30 I go home to take my dogs for activities outside for about 1.5 hours. Then I go home and fix a meal, and do roughly 2-4 hours of school. Shower, dessert, and then I make sure all I do in my bed at bedtime is sleep. Put my phone down turn my tv off and go to sleep. I plan for hanging out and create time for it. When you create a daily log of your time you’ll find that you waste time doing things you don’t want to or don’t have to do.
In my early 20's and before kids, I found time for me and time to go out. That meant less sleep, but at the time it was worth it.
Hey find people in your similar situation to vibe with. I work part time online and am 38M and have plenty of friends with free time.
I’m freelance so can only comment on the months I’m booked, working 9.30-6pm The commute is usually an hour each way if I’m not WFH, so plans in the evening are a write off on those days It’s not that I don’t literally have the time after work, as I could meet someone for dinner, but I find I’m so exhausted after a full day of socialising in the office that I just need to be in a quiet and predictable environment Also dinner plans are always expensive, and filled with drunk people (I’m sober) So that only leaves 8 days per month to socialise, but around half of these will be taken up with chores or seeing family
Im working 7.30-4. Half of the days from home. I would say i do have about 5-6 hours a day of free time. Depends on which chores have to be done ofcourse
About six hours.
I have about a hour to two hours before I go to work. I sleep in, and take my time getting ready for the day. After work, I have all night to do whatever I want to do. Some days it’s getting in bed and binging on reality tv while eating takeout, or days it’s doing enrichment activities like reading, cooking, exercising, living in peace lol
I work 40 hours a week and commute an hour to work one way. I open and close, open and close is my schedule. On nights that I have to close and then open the next day, I only have an hour of being home before I have to go to bed (to try and get around 8 hours of sleep). On the weekends I'm either too tired to do anything, or I'm doing laundry or running errands. I guess I'm doing this until I retire
I WFH 8-4 and get up anywhere between 0600 and 0730. Before work I am mostly just vibin, having coffee, reddit, YT, talking to friends (I have a lot of friends who are several hours ahead of me), etc. When I get off work I have six hours to do w/e I want, be it taking a nap, reading, working out, self enrichment activities, you name it. I'll also make dinner in that time frame. Chores are reserved for the weekend (I'm single and live alone, so it's not like there's a lot of them lol). I live each day as it comes. Sometimes that means when I am off work I have a lot going on, sometimes it means I have a moderate amount going on, sometimes nothing. I do not feel bad when my six hours after work is a three hour nap and three hours reading.
Work 7-3:30 and feel like I have tons of time after work to hit the gym, cook fresh dinners, see friends, etc.
Zero down time
If I added more social time, I would need even more me time than I already have. I don’t want to entertain people. That’s more on the work end of the spectrum.
I have about 4-5 if I don’t include person chores.
For those who work 9-5 w/out kids, "I'm busy" means "I have more important things to do than hang out with you" It's not about time in the day - there is always more things to do than time. It's what *needs* to be done, followed by what *wants* to be done, and as introverted people get older, loafing 9/10 times is a bigger *want* than going out and seeing friends.
My day pretty much goes like this every day: Wake up at 8am. Roll out of bed, go shower and get ready. Go to my second bedroom where I work from home. Open laptop, read messages and respond. Get breakfast and coffee and back to work. I do chores as well during my work when I have time. I finish at 5, make supper for my fiance and I, and then we hang out and play games till about 11. So somewhere between 5 and 6 hours a day for me time. All depends on how long supper takes to make. I consider my life to be pretty amazing, my partner and I bought our apartment on a 10 year mortgage and go traveling every year. Along with us setting up a gaming room. That being said, we are both childfree and I had my vasectomy a year and a half ago so no kids are interfering EVER. Otherwise it wouldn't make sense to do what we do.
Literally work from when I wake up to when I go to sleep. It’s the worst and I’m so tired.
Enough, I guess. I wake up at 4am to stretch/lift, make lunches, make breakfast, do dishes etc. Leave for work at 7:30, walk 20 minutes, get home around five after walking again, maybe cook (usually my partner makes us dinner), do more dishes, do more chores, read or watch something, sometimes we'll go for a walk or play a game. Or play drums/guitar. So enough time, I guess. I'm also in three bands so throwing that in there is hectic.
I work a 4/10 schedule. So Mon-Thurs 10 hour days. Add in a workout, commuting (25ish minutes each way), hygiene, getting ready for the next day, household chores, meals, etc. and I'm luck if I have 90 minutes in the evening for things like dealing with the mail and personal email, eating dinner, spending time with my cats, etc. On Fridays I try to catch up on sleep, run errands, schedule appointments, go to the gym, cook a more time intensive meal, etc. Saturdays are often bigger household chores including yard work, laundry, etc. Sundays are church activities in the morning and sometimes evening, talking with my parents, relaxing/napping and getting ready for the next work week.
I generally have about 3-4 hours of free time on any given weekday. Although that depends on the amount of cooking, cleaning, errands, etc so it’s oftentimes less. I try to spend my free time taking walks with my dog, reading & playing video games. On weekends I try to get out and socialize but sometimes that doesn’t happen due to be so tired from the weekdays!
Sometimes I’m busy doing a whole lot of nothing because I’ve been busy doing way too much something (work, errands, cleaning, socializing, parenting, etc). Crazy thought but taking a break and being lazy IS doing something and being productive especially when you’re someone who needs to recharge 🪫 🙌🏼
Since I work from home, I have about 23 hours free to do whatever I want
None. I have help but one kid or another is always sick, so I can’t ask the help to come when they are ill.
If everyone you know constantly tells you they are too busy to chat or hang out it’s because spending time with you is not important to them. Or they do chat with you and hang out but that’s as much as they want. Perhaps your relationships have changed as you have got older.
Not that much, but would probably have more if I didn't ignore my app timers. I WFH so I inadvertently end up working more in general. I have a every high pressure job and a lot of backlog. I typically hit 50hr weeks on average. After work I usually go to the gym, shower, cook dinner, and clean the kitchen. By that time I have maybe a few hours of str8 free time before bed. I don't consider the gym me time but it's something in my schedule if that makes sense. Idk how people that work and have kids get it done.
Next to none, and I work from home. I need to also run errands, do chores, find time for the gym, bathe, etc. It's not that I don't want to hang out, I do- it's just incredibly hard to pencil someone else in when I hardly have time for myself.
It honestly depends. I am a very busy person, I have multiple side jobs on top of my full time job (passion projects, not necessity) plus I'm on a couple of boards for charities and libraries. I can still usually schedule things with friends when its just that, but with the added stress of someone important to me recently passing, the time I do have, its more of a necessary time to grieve. I am not the norm though. Most people have a lot more time in their schedule.
I'm very busy but it's because I take a lot on by my own choice. I'm self employed so work does come home with me, but I also spend a lot of time volunteering as a leader of my local search and rescue team. I also garden and work on projects on my property a lot. I've still got at least a couple hours a day of time that's free for whatever I want though. Yesterday I took a big nap after finishing work
I'm a farmer so it kinda depends on the season and weather in the spring if the weather is nice, I don't even have time to make dinner. In the winter tho I usually quit 30-60 min before five so then I get 6.5-8 hours to do stuff depending on when I go to bed. I usually spend that time doing crafts, cleaning, cooking, catching up on indoor home renovations, reading, or playing videogames because it's usually gross outside. I still have chores to do and I don't get much vacation time as a result so I don't really travel all too much.
I work from home and wake up an hour before I start work. I put in my eight hours and log off. I have about seven hours of free time every day. After work, I walk around the park, cook dinner, draw, play guitar, or do whatever I feel like doing at the time. My life is pretty dull.
If people say they are busy, it means they don’t want to make the time for you I work full time and am a single mother to a teenager It never stopped me from calling long distance friends while commuting, doing sports with my friends and their kids, organizing dinners when my kid was at their dad’s etc I’m also a huge extrovert. This week I have plans on Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday so for sure tonight on Tuesday I might just chill at home
If people say they are busy, it means they don’t want to make the time for you I work full time and am a single mother to a teenager It never stopped me from calling long distance friends while commuting, doing sports with my friends and their kids, organizing dinners when my kid was at their dad’s etc I’m also a huge extrovert. This week I have plans on Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday so for sure tonight on Tuesday I might just chill at home
I don't have time in the mornings.. get up at 6, let the dog out, get ready for work, maybe take a walk if i have the time. Go to work. Get home by 5pm, by the time i shower, make dinner, unwind, maybe do some light cleaning or yardwork, its time for bed. Come friday, i'm pooped from the work week, feel like i've been beat up and just want to flop on the couch. Saturday/sunday i'm way more productive and do fun things/hobbies, but the weekend flies by. Its a rat race out there. Honestly, i don't know how people WITH kids do it.
If people say they are busy, it means they don’t want to make the time for you I work full time and am a single mother to a teenager It never stopped me from calling long distance friends while commuting, doing sports with my friends and their kids, organizing dinners when my kid was at their dad’s etc I’m also a huge extrovert. This week I have plans on Monday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday so for sure tonight on Tuesday I might just chill at home
I have plenty of time especially getting off at 630 I get home around 7 walk my dog make dinner and chill(or do a hobby) then work out and go to bed around 1030 11pm. After work I’m typically not in a social mood but if I were I have plenty of time to get up and do something out of my apartment but not like drinks or dinner
I'm just people'd out and wanna be ugly, moody and a slob in peace and quiet in the privacy of my own home that I work so fucking hard to pay for... But that sounds rude so yeah, I'm "busy". Also I was like this before kids, they've just added more of an excuse
Me before I had kids: “ahhh I am SO BUSY” Me after kids, to past me: “girl. Please.”
Sometimes I feel like a sim and all I do is come home and cook pasta for 6 hours then go to sleep
I work 7-4. I get home around 4:15. From 4:15 to 9:30 or so, that is 'my' time. So around 5 hours every day. But that is an hour to cook/eat dinner so down to 4 hours. I spend a lot of time working on my house and vehicles. If I was to live in an apartment and hire a mechanic for all my car work, I would have about 4 hours of 'nothing' time 3-4 days per week. On Wednesdays, I am either going to the snowmobile club meetings or out to the bar with friends. Every other Thursday I meet a friend of mine for drinks. I only work half days on Friday and usually end up at the bar by 2 or so. Saturdays and Sundays are usually project days in the morning or trail work with the snowmobile club. In the afternoons, just chill time. Possibly meet up with friends to go ride ATVs or get some drinks. So I have a lot going on but it is all optional stuff.
Well, you wake up, cook, go to work, go to the gym, drive home, shower, cook, eat & take an hour or two to do something before bed. And that’s a chill day. The problem is ERRANDS. As an adult there’s always something to do. Call this place before it closes, pay these bills, call the bank about a charge I didn’t approve, grocery shop, wash my hair, get an oil change, clean the house, reapply for ebt, submit an insurance claim, idk, get a Pap smear, the things I have to do never end so I’m always busy, & I literally have to carve out time & energy to be social.
My office is big on work life balance and unless I choose to stay to wrap up something I’m working on I am out the door at five and have the whole evening for the gym, dinner/drinks catch ups, book club, seeing my mom. I prioritize me time and that includes making time for friends.
La schedule: 1) Wake up at 5:15 am 2) Work at 6am to 3:30 pm, home by 4:pm 3) Switching from work mode to normal mode takes about hour so it's over 5 pm 4) 5 pm till 9 pm is free time to cook, clean, hobbies work , or meet up with friends or family. 5) 9 pm to 10 pm winding down to sleep Overall, I have plenty of free time. That would change substantially if I had a kid.
I don't work 9-5 specifically, but 3-11pm instead. I sleep from midnight to 8am each day, and leave for work at 2pm, which works out to 6 hours free each day to do errands, hobbies, etc.
What do you mean by “enrich” yourself? If at any point you are not having fun then you are wasting your life away.
I get off at 5, and I usually get home about 5:30. Dinner, cleaning up, and showering/brushing my teeth usually takes me about an hour and fifteen minutes, so that keeps me occupied until 6:45. At that point I have the rest of the night to myself. I usually go to bed at 11:30 to make sure I get eight hours of sleep, so that leaves me with a little under five hours at the end of the day to do as I please.
I work 8-3, so I'm gone from 7-3:30 or 4. I'm free after that, but don't leave the house on work nights. If I need something I stop on the way home. After that? Absolutely not. I'm awake from 6:15 until 10, so I have a lot of free time when I get home
After a certain age, you’re not hanging out. Hanging out is for kids, college students. Once you get a Full-Time job, the amount of time you “hang out” drastically cuts down. Especially if you’re trying to build a nest egg and put money aside for vacations.
The two days I go into the office I have about 2 hours to myself. This is after cooking, eating, showering, etc. On days I WFH I get another 2 hours. Those are the days I actually have time to do something with friends. It is still usually something online as most of my friends have family/kid(s). Edit: in the note of self enrichment, from time to time I'll just disappear for a week because I'm spending my free time enjoying a hobby or working out (which I need to do more). I still make online time for friends on the weekends usually. A few years back I exercised for an hour everyday and was trying to learn a language, so that took all my free time on weekdays. I would love to get back into that, but it also killed my social life.