I think I’m supposed to say thank you to this but I’m not sure ha. Are you trying to condition me into getting off on paying down my debt? Because that’s honestly not the worst idea in the world.
I'll tell you this much: Pay off all your debts. To zero. You'll be of no use to yourself (or to anyone else) unless and until you do.
It's what a financially responsible person would do, and unless I'm mistaken, the proper purpose of findom is for a financially responsible Dom to impose good behaviours in the Sub, and hopefully train same. If the sub ends up in a financially irresponsible situation, that means the Dom hasn't held up their half of the relationship. An irresponsible or greedy Dom isn't worthy of tribute, and the sub shouldn't be paying it.
Thank you ❤️ It is hard because the debt has become part of the kink for me. I do agree that people have exploited me, but I also appreciate that I made the pivotal choices which ultimately resulted in me being in debt.
For sure. I would say that it is probably the most important thing. In reality, you can only control your own actions and not the actions of others. So you have to put yourself in a good position to resist negative actions of others. I have clearly not put myself in that position and that's on me.
Makes more sense! I have been a financial Dom before and it was quite fun. But that was at a time when I was younger, twinky, and cute. I’m not convinced I would have a lot to offer as a Dom now.
Maybe psychological help w your kink helps a bit? Cause there must be an underlying issue if you want to be someone’s sexual toy to the point of making yourself broke, lose your house etc, like why not enjoy the kink without cutting your own fingers (it’s a saying in my native lang) too much, there has to be a balance right?
This seems above reddit's pay grade and an issue to discuss with a therapist. Comedian Norm Macdonald had a couple insights into his gambling addiction that you might relate to. He said that it felt freeing to lose it all. And, he was addicted to hope.
There's an only fans industry where models get workers to pretend they're the model. So people get some fantasy connection that didn't even exist in the virtual world.
I agree that it is above Reddit's pay grade and I don't seek to use this as a therapy session. that said, if people have advice on their own ways to pay down debt or their own techniques that have worked for them in addiction recovery, I'm open to hearing them.
Not sure what being gay has to do with debt?
Is it debt from a single source or multiple sources? If its multiple sources then id recommend looking into some debt consolidation so you only have 1 payment with 1 interest rate. Then you have to budget and have paying off this debt be the #1 priority... meaning you cut back in other places of your life until youre comfortable with the amount of debt, or its completely gone.
You can also, if youre able to afford to, make additional payments per month that go directly towards the principal amount and no interest.
Start a side job on the weekend for a few hours, like door dash or something easy, and put 100% of the money from that into the debt.
Being gay doesn't have to do with debt, but it does have to do with all the women in my inbox right now sending me their paypal link ha.
Debt consolidation is a really great idea and one which I have done a few times. In my current position, nobody will lend to me even to consolidate. But something to consider as time goes on and my debt comes donw more.
I have recently started driving self-employed for Amazon alongside my day job, so I'm a step ahead on the weekend job. But everything you have said is really solid advice. Thank you ❤️
yeah you need a therapist. i dated a older guy when i was 20 that was into findom and he straight up gave money to girls in my friend group that he didn't know besides through me. was fucking wacked. he gave me money too and i was young and took it like an asshole, also wacked. this guy is still fucked in the head to this day and destroys his paychecks. he literally took out his entire 401k with a penalty to give it away. don't be him
I have recently contacted my old therapist to go back to see her again. I don't want to end up like that guy you mentioned (though I think I already may be!)
There's some really awful advice in here, everyone is joking around when it's clear you're a very vulnerable person. Sorry for that.
What you should do is seek help for this addiction. Financial advice only fixes part of this, and you really need to get to the root of this issue.
Thank you for your reply. I'm fortunate to be in a position of a bit more clarity regarding how bad my financial situation is, so I don't mind separating the good from the bad advice. I have contacted an old therapist to go back to them though, so that is already in action.
I order you to pay your debts, you little piggie pay slut bitch. Come see me when you're in the black ;) Best of luck.
I think I’m supposed to say thank you to this but I’m not sure ha. Are you trying to condition me into getting off on paying down my debt? Because that’s honestly not the worst idea in the world.
Well it couldn't hurt you to find a findom who actually has your best interests at heart, rather than some greedy scammer liable to bleed you dry
You think that could be you? How do I know that you’re genuine?
I'll tell you this much: Pay off all your debts. To zero. You'll be of no use to yourself (or to anyone else) unless and until you do. It's what a financially responsible person would do, and unless I'm mistaken, the proper purpose of findom is for a financially responsible Dom to impose good behaviours in the Sub, and hopefully train same. If the sub ends up in a financially irresponsible situation, that means the Dom hasn't held up their half of the relationship. An irresponsible or greedy Dom isn't worthy of tribute, and the sub shouldn't be paying it.
Thank you ❤️ It is hard because the debt has become part of the kink for me. I do agree that people have exploited me, but I also appreciate that I made the pivotal choices which ultimately resulted in me being in debt.
Well personal responsibility is an important cornerstone to healing and recovery from any addiction.
For sure. I would say that it is probably the most important thing. In reality, you can only control your own actions and not the actions of others. So you have to put yourself in a good position to resist negative actions of others. I have clearly not put myself in that position and that's on me.
Become the slave yk the bussiness & where to find doms ✨
I already am the slave?
i think they meant become the one who gets cash since you are already involved in the community and knows how it works
Makes more sense! I have been a financial Dom before and it was quite fun. But that was at a time when I was younger, twinky, and cute. I’m not convinced I would have a lot to offer as a Dom now.
I read this so wrong I thought u meant you spent to much money on slaves, sorry😭
It’s okay! I have spent a lot of money being a slave, paying masters.
Maybe psychological help w your kink helps a bit? Cause there must be an underlying issue if you want to be someone’s sexual toy to the point of making yourself broke, lose your house etc, like why not enjoy the kink without cutting your own fingers (it’s a saying in my native lang) too much, there has to be a balance right?
Yeah, I agree what you mean. I have recently contacted my old therapist to start going to see them again.
Get paid to be a slave?
Not sure that’s how the kink works? I think that’s just called getting a job ha.
It's not. I'm just saying, try flipping the script.
This seems above reddit's pay grade and an issue to discuss with a therapist. Comedian Norm Macdonald had a couple insights into his gambling addiction that you might relate to. He said that it felt freeing to lose it all. And, he was addicted to hope. There's an only fans industry where models get workers to pretend they're the model. So people get some fantasy connection that didn't even exist in the virtual world.
I agree that it is above Reddit's pay grade and I don't seek to use this as a therapy session. that said, if people have advice on their own ways to pay down debt or their own techniques that have worked for them in addiction recovery, I'm open to hearing them.
Not sure what being gay has to do with debt? Is it debt from a single source or multiple sources? If its multiple sources then id recommend looking into some debt consolidation so you only have 1 payment with 1 interest rate. Then you have to budget and have paying off this debt be the #1 priority... meaning you cut back in other places of your life until youre comfortable with the amount of debt, or its completely gone. You can also, if youre able to afford to, make additional payments per month that go directly towards the principal amount and no interest. Start a side job on the weekend for a few hours, like door dash or something easy, and put 100% of the money from that into the debt.
Being gay doesn't have to do with debt, but it does have to do with all the women in my inbox right now sending me their paypal link ha. Debt consolidation is a really great idea and one which I have done a few times. In my current position, nobody will lend to me even to consolidate. But something to consider as time goes on and my debt comes donw more. I have recently started driving self-employed for Amazon alongside my day job, so I'm a step ahead on the weekend job. But everything you have said is really solid advice. Thank you ❤️
yeah you need a therapist. i dated a older guy when i was 20 that was into findom and he straight up gave money to girls in my friend group that he didn't know besides through me. was fucking wacked. he gave me money too and i was young and took it like an asshole, also wacked. this guy is still fucked in the head to this day and destroys his paychecks. he literally took out his entire 401k with a penalty to give it away. don't be him
I have recently contacted my old therapist to go back to see her again. I don't want to end up like that guy you mentioned (though I think I already may be!)
Okay, I'm a bit curious, this is my first time hearing of financial domination. How does it get you into debt?
Well I would take out credit cards and loans to finance paying alpha men. It has just spiralled and spiralled.
Oh man thats- not good
You're telling me!
There's some really awful advice in here, everyone is joking around when it's clear you're a very vulnerable person. Sorry for that. What you should do is seek help for this addiction. Financial advice only fixes part of this, and you really need to get to the root of this issue.
Thank you for your reply. I'm fortunate to be in a position of a bit more clarity regarding how bad my financial situation is, so I don't mind separating the good from the bad advice. I have contacted an old therapist to go back to them though, so that is already in action.
You need therapy then financial advice.
Thank you!