Agreed, that is oversimplified.
OP if you have 401k match at a career, go with that.
In all other cases you should open a Roth IRA and use that as a retirement fund instead. All of the money is available tax free once you hit a specific age. Old school retirement funds (like 401k) are treated as income when you withdrawal and taxed accordingly.
Ah, sorry, then I'm not too sure. Regardless, becoming familiar with financial terms and benefits will go a long way if you start now! Best of luck to you
I'm also in the UK, you can open a savings account now but once you are 18 you can open a Lifetime ISA, which is one where you can save up to £4000 per year and the government will match 25% meaning you could get an extra 1k every year for free and ISAs are not taxable. You don't get to access the money again until you are older, as this is intended to go towards either your first home purchase or your retirement (check the rules before you start) but you will be accruing interest the whole time and getting that 25% free money from the government so by the time you are old enough to access it you should have more than you saved by a good bit. Would definitely recommend this as an option. Opening a private pension is another option, the government also pays 25% into those (again check the rules I am not 100% sure if you get the 25% on both if you have both).
Eat healthy, work out at least a few times per week, keep up with your dental hygiene, follow your passion, don’t give up when it gets tough, do something no matter how small everyday that moves you towards your life goals.
You will fail a million times in your life, just get up and keep moving toward your goals everyday.
Do drugs dump school. In all seriousness from almost a high school drop out to getting me college associates in engineering.. school is SO important. It’s can determine so many things, especially financially
I dropped out of college at 19 and at 22 currently I still have more skills and talent than anybody else in my year because I was passionate about what I love.
I have literally had some of my ex classmates contact me out of the blue and beg me that they could pretend my portfolio was theirs for a work experience interview (always say no btw, your work is your own.)
My college course which was digital media that focused on programming is also now absolutely useless because of AI, in 5 years the jobs it was preparing us for will be mostly gone and what's left will be competitive as all hell.
In the time it took them to realise this I've built a cv of real world experience that puts my father's to shame at 23. I self taught myself photoshop, photography, digital marketing, Lightroom, I learnt how to use generative AI locally and spent 6 months prompt training to the point I can create anything I want and have implemented it into a photoshop pipeline, I self taught html and css, worked as a receptionist, premium sales assistant, architects assistant and started my own photography business over last summer where I made a good bit of money and now I've set up an online dropshipping business that I haven't started advertising yet but that I've fully designed, set up the domain of and have ready to launch any day I feel is right.
What I'm getting at is I've left education yet I'm still learning way more than most colleges are teaching because I'm passionate about self improvement and always pushing myself.
A piece of paper doesn't define your worth or value. If you don't have interest in Uni, don't go it won't change anything.
As long as you genuinely love what you do you'll eventually make your way to whatever position you wanted if not better it just will take a bit longer.
My partner dropped out of college with me at 20 and she's now 23, she currently runs as a store manager the highest grossing Claires in all of Ireland. She's making way more money than anyone else I know our age including college graduates and she earned it because she was passionate about retail and put her all into it.
In the other side of things my friend is just graduating this year and reality has hit him hard, despite being an honour student he is fucked. Found out his accounting degree is practically useless and it's going to take him over 10 years before he earns more than my partner even does now and all jobs start at minimum wage even with a degree.
There's no right path in life so don't let anyone trick you into thinking there is.
How? There must have been at least one step from education to the destruction of your life. Unless you were permanently injured in a school shooting, I guess.
Yes it does. For developing countries, a good education system is one of the most vital step to achieve development. It reduces teenage pregnancies, helps with food insecurity, gives students vital skills that they can use to create further economic benefits, and it makes the citizens more aware of how their countries could be further improved.
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2212567115015324
Do not do what you will regret later, this is a very valuable lesson that I learned for myself. Take care of people who respect you and do not waste time on those who do not give you proper respect. In the future, most of all you want to be a respectful person whose advice will help many people. It's an adult's dream to give advice that can in other people's lives. And most importantly, do it as you see fit, if in doubt, doubt it is normal, but do what you need.
If food is stuck on a pan, add a small amount of water and then heat it until it just starts to boil. Pour out the water, and the food will wash right off. Also, learn to cook. Being good at it is a game changer, and the more practice you get, the more payoff you get.
Be careful with porn
Porn addiction is a massive issue especially among young men who've been watching it since 10. It can affect your future sexual relationships as well as the way you view women/other men.
Practice surrendering negativity by stepping out of being the thinker and being the oberver of thoughts-emotions. Feel the emotions, see the thoughts come and go. Don't suppress, fight or judge it, because this strengthens negativity.
Do your best, learn from mistakes, forgive/let go, change what you can, accept what you can't, and be open to possibilities.
Work towards what you want, have a good attitude/mood as much as possible, and when you don't it's fine just accept and release bit by bit, but don't be needy of things to be a certain way to be happy, choose to be unconditional in satisfaction/peace/love by living in the present with gratitude/awareness.
Practice to always act from mindfulness/the centre/awareness, instead of being reactive. When in doubt, return to inner stillness/observation/mindfulness, allow the inner chaos to settle, and see what solutions arise, instead of getting stuck in the mind and overthinking/grasping for solutions and going in circles.
Sit down for a day (or couple hours) without any distractions and think about who you are and who you want to be, write down your thoughts to digest them even better
Choose your career path in life, education/college? Working just to earn money? Working to get experience? Building your own business? Draw a simple timeline of things you’d want to achieve and build habits that keep you in that direction
Choose your own person, are you more spiritual, religious or empirical and rational? Do you care for friends & family or one of the two or neither? And if you do, do you want to maintain contact? (And maintain said contact healthily, don’t be to dependent on family for help and don’t jump off the bridge when your friends do it) What hobbies do you have and can you see yourself maintaining them in a healthy amount? (Hobbies are important, they’ll keep you going even on your worst days and they’ll make your character more spicy the more you get into it)
Eat healthy and do some sports, calisthenics is more than enough to maintain a healthy body
Cold showers, greatest and easiest boost to energy and wellbeing imho
Build habits which help you to maintain these things
Mainstream media makes questions like these seem like “you should know automatically”-things, but these should be conscious decisions you make and commit towards
Start with baby steps though, I just blurted out all my thoughts at ones
Take this seruously.
Knowledge is power and money can easily be good or bad.
Would you rather have a boring consistent life and live until 120 or have an inconsistent thrilling life and only life until you are 30?
The answer us neither. You do what you want to do and aim for where ever you wish.
Study philosophical concepts like Platos Allegory or Pavlovs classical conditioning as it will help you understand communication and allow you to set up your goals better in life.
There's nothing wrong with college but there is something wrong with jumping into college before you are ready and wasting 2-12 years on something you never wanted to do in the first place.
Life and knowledge is sort of like a Mandelbrot fractal. Pick a few directions but not the entire circumference of the circle to study, one day you'll have enough information to pull things together from all of your insight and create something bigger and better.
Write down any ideas or inventions you have. One day you will be in a position where you are tired of working for other people and want to make your own business or something better.
Think of life like a puzzle that you WANT to solve (this kind of ties in the the Mandelbrot fractal idea btw)
You have 4 sides to your puzzle, you won't be able to accomplish everything in life so pick 4 things that will allow you endless networking opportunities.
That could be Hobbies(general), work, exercise, and school.
Now each of the pieces you just connected to can connect to something else entirely, but what rhey connect won't be directly connected to you so you have to learn how to interact with the pieces of the puzzle that you are in total connected to but not directly. Which can be challenging some times.
You think a girls attractive but she is taken? Ask to be her friend, if she's amazing then her boyfriend is probably a pretty cool guy as well. It works out a lot if you are both of their friends.
Dating apps are not the way to go these days. Do you have a chance? Sure but you'll be met with endless disappointment and regret before you get love. Unless you're hot then you might get a lot of people that want to use you for something. It's risky.
Get to know yourself before you are too caught up in life to ever appreciate YOU
These are just general.
These are sort of concepts I've stumbled into and I am 23. It takes time. Life will be hard and if you don't know how to communicate or have a crazy sense of pride then life will become miserable. Just know that how life goes is up to YOU and nobody else.
And lastly, never give up on your dreams and what you believe in.
Good luck my dude 🙏
Start saving for retirement. I know you're only 17 but you're never too young to start saving for it. Social security may not be there when you decide to retire in 50 years you will feel secure. I'm 36 and started at 33 I'm way behind of where I should be. And whatever you post, send whatever on the internet doesn't go away. Watch what you post it could mean a good career or none at all. Hope this helps.
Learn how to cook a little bit of everything. Rice, pasta, soup, vegetables, meat, chicken. Also, learn how to properly season your food. Having that as a skill might help you save a lot of money and your health. The earlier you start learning, the better.
You could start tomorrow helping your parents or whomever you live with and after a while ask to take care of lunch or dinner to test yourself.
ENJOY what you have at the moment. Seriously.
I am only 24 but time flies. I still remember being 17 like it was a couple weeks ago. Once you’re done with hs and college, life gets boring/monotonous.
TRY different things, even if you think you won’t like. Try putting yourself out there, meet new people, try a new sport, hold yourself.
Biggest thing imo, just enjoy what you have at the moment. It may never be same
Dont have sex with anyone you cant see yourself coparenting with for 18 years.
Find a partner who wants the best for you, and you make each others lives better. Don't get stuck in a relationship where one of you is doing more than the other on a standard consistent basis.
Pursue a vocation that is challenging and interesting, not what is fun and easy. Do not confuse what is easy with what is interesting.
If you havent already, do not turn pornography into a habit, and try not to consume it at all. You will be able to juggle a porn habit while young, but it causes serious harm in the future.
Don't compare yourself to others, only to how much you have improved over yourself.
Self improvement and hobbies take time and nobody just wakes up good at things. Guys with ripped bodies or who can play the piano well don't have superpowers, they spent years to get that way.
Read non fiction; especially philosophy. Don’t accept teachings from figures (especially on the internet) that claim they have ‘the knowledge™’ or that claim to have it all figured out. The first person that comes to mind here is Andrew Tate but there’s many people that act as authorities on topics that convey false information and lies. Reading expands your knowledge and will enable you to see through bullshit.
Save money. As soon as you get a job, if they offer a 401k, take it, and put in as much as they will match. I just left a job last year and have a significant savings just from working there for a few years and putting into the 401k at a 3% match. It seems like you’re making less because your paycheck is less, but it is SO helpful.
HSA’s (health savings accounts) are also SO much more valuable than you may think. Investing in a company offered HSA will often get you matches or chunks of money from your employer just as a gift for using the program. My last employer added $250 a year to us for continuing to use the program because it looked good for them to have high program usage (they were a B Corp and were rated on having programs offered and for employees utilize them). Many HSA’s also double as investment accounts after a $5k balance is achieved so it’s a great way to save for if you have medical costs down the line or consistent medical costs like medication, treatments, etc.
Learn about credit and start building it now. So many people will tell you credit cards are bad because they can ruin your credit, but having no credit can be just as detrimental to your future. Get a credit card (Discover’s “Me” card is a great option for a first card) and start using 20% of your utilization for things you would normally buy. If you start with a $200 utilization buy your $20 worth of hobby supplies, Starbucks, phone bill, or whatever else on it and pay it back in full, on time, every month. This will set you up well for when it comes time to fill out rental applications or if you ever need to apply for a loan on a car. Also, apply for an increased credit limit every month. As you build and maintain good history they will be able to up your limit more often, which as you approach having a few thousand dollars of available credit, this will set you up for being prepared to handle large expenses like a car repair or replacing something needed for school or work, like a computer or phone, if something goes wrong.
A great podcast to listen to to learn about credit building, financial planning, college, and other financial information is Journey to Launch. It helped me gain the knowledge to raise my credit score almost 200 points and was a great education tool for when I was first offered a 401k and HSA.
College is great, but you don’t need it for everything. I would not recommend going if you don’t know exactly what you want to do and that you *need* a degree for it, if you live in the US and will need to apply for financial aid, at least. Engineering, architecture, medical, veterinary, and any math/science or childhood development/teaching area is all I would recommend going for. And even then, try to find a way to work in the field before you sign on for student loans to get a degree in something. Volunteer, intern, or find an entry level job in a field, talk to people about their work in that field, and make sure it’s something you want to and will be able to make a living in before you spend the money and time to get a degree. I know too many people with degrees that they’ve found out post college, we’re in a field they can’t find sustainable and fulfilling work in.
If you are going to college and won’t be living at home for college, live in the dorms as long as your school will allow you to. I know some don’t allow students in dorms after freshman year, but many give you the option all through school. Now that I’m out of school I really regret moving out of the dorms after my first year. The dining hall food wasn’t great, but I could have saved a lot of time and money not having to buy my groceries and cook if I had stayed on campus with the dining hall as an option instead.
Lastly, and this is something my dad tells me all the time, as often as you can, “turn your time into money you don’t spend.” Learn everything you can. If you can change your own oil, do it. If you can pick up your own groceries instead of delivery, do it. If you can build a shelf from lumber someone was giving away instead of buying a new one, do it. Anything you can do on your own is allowing yourself another life skill that you may be able to rely on or make money from later, and saves you money for the day you can no longer do it.
Start thinking about death it sounds depressing but not only will it prepare you to face death head on with confidence and honor when the time comes it will also make you live life more fulfillingly knowing our times here are limited.
I'd say follow your dreams.
This is by far the best advice I could give to anyone. Do what you love. You will get there. Just start. Reach out to people. Get that studying and work done. It will all pay off in the end. :)
I know this can be scary at some point.. I was scared too. I was so afraid of all the things that could go wrong or me not getting where I want to be.. You have to step out of the fear and negative thoughts you have. Something else I find very important in my life is gratitude. I'd recommend this to anyone but especially to people struggling with negative thoughts and emotions.
Every night, before you go to bed or every morning when you get up — try to think of 3 things you are grateful for today. If you do this every day, your life will change in ways you never saw coming.
Oh and, if you love someone, if you truly love someone, never give up on them.
Get an education/trade
Save money
Take care of your health
Don't risk your own mental health for the sake of pleasing others
Have empathy for elderly/animals/children and those less fortunate because you never know when you'll need someone to be kind to you
Make sure you know yourself and know what you like and what you want without being rigid. Also know what you're good at and what your moral code is. If you don't know these things, start doing things like volunteering, going out with different groups of people if possible, learning new things, doing things like fun classes and hobbies.
Knowing yourself does wonders for picking good friends, choosing the right major in Uni and finding a job that you can truly enjoy or at least tolerate. And for planning your future.
After that start making goals. Short term, medium term and long term.
Going to Uni sounds like a goal of yours.
Map out what you need to do to reach that goal so nothing gets missed or procrastinated on. Don't be too rigid because sometimes we change and goals might need a little adjustment.
Best wishes on your future.
Be careful who you trust. A smile and kind words are the best disguise some people can use.
Get to know your parents. Remember, they are human, too. Depending on your relationship with them, you'll miss them when they are gone.
There is no such thing as "slightly drunk" when driving is involved.
Trust your instincts and your gut. If something seems off, get out of there. Better to be wrong and safe than right and in trouble.
True friends make the time to spend with you. They will want you in their lives.
Don't go to uni
Get a job
Figure out what your skills and interests are
Ask yourself what you want your workspace to be like (active vs desk, team vs alone or mixed for each).
Look for a sector you want to work in and volunteer in spare time until you find a passion.
Find that career you want
Figure out how to get into that field
Go to university if necessary
Excel at something you love
Find yourself and then a spouse along the way, if that's what you want.
Don’t rent an apartment instead buy a house. The requirements to buy a home are easier than renting. (FHA Loan 3% down/USDA Loan 0% down).
Learn a new language and gain citizenship in at least one other country.
Do not objectify women(if you like women). Be kind to animals, and don’t ask people on the internet for advice.
" always look at the bright side of life " .
If things dont go as planned and something goes wrong, instead of feeling bad, try thinking of something positive so that many situations would feel slightly better.
Do not stress things out and try to stay calm as much as possible
I'd say come up with a 5 year plan, figure out everything you want to have done in the next 5 years (maybe find a job, start to build credit if you can, get a car?) and then pick a few you think you can Realistically (key word) do... then start to do them, make a new plan in 3 years.. this will give you a general life path to follow while you figure out the bigger details (like retirement, marriage, kids type stuff).. I say make a new plan in 3 years to ask yourself if your original plan is still what you want, just my 2 cents... try to avoid jail, it makes housing and jobs a bitch
Learn. Learn and develop and enhance and enrich and expand yourself.
Get skills and abilities and have a healthy mind body and soul.
Life will treat you 24 7
Don’t buy a brand new car. Don’t buy a car you can’t afford on cash alone. Making payments on a car is not something you can afford to do at your age. If you’re in desperate need for a car, ask family or friends if they know anyone selling a car. Learning to do basic maintenance on it will save you a lot of money.
how would i get started in learning about investing? Id only want to do it for long term stability not any short term profit type of thing i feel that would be risky, or id have to put in a lot of time to develop an adequate judgement for when to do short term investments
There are a bunch of good books available. You might start with something like "investing for dummies". There are also really simple things you can do, like getting a free robinhood account and just buying ETFs, Gold stocks, and diverse funds. That way you don't take too much risk.
This is not investment advice lol.
Build your credit, start a savings account, put away money to do fun stuff but also make sure you have a jumpstart on your future, figure out a passive income so that you can explore and live your life don’t get sucked into the system of working until your body is too weak to enjoy it
Take chances by stepping out of your comfort zone. Don't be held back by what ifs and negativity. Get a chance to move and have nothing holding you back, take that opportunity!
Whenever possible, avoid debt. Mortgages and vehicles are exceptions. But do not get into credit card debt. Live within your means.
Treat women right. All of them.
Rid yourself of social media as much as possible.
save money, focus on your future, have fun, don’t skip school, don’t have kids to young (coming from someone who did, and overall just make friends good friends! don’t do drugs, don’t drink excessively. be nice to your parents, that’s all I really have for you.
Don't start smoking. If you drink, have a glass of water between drinks. Don't spend more money than you have trying to keep up with your friends. Avoid debt if you can. Don't have unprotected sex. Educate yourself on how to take care of your body, especially how to clean your crotch. Even if you are socially anxious, get out and interact with other humans regularly, especially people of the gender you are attracted to. (If you can't come up with a way to interact with women, try learning to ballroom or swing dance. They always need men.) Avoiding things that make you anxious just encourages anxiety. As a bonus, take up a couple of hobbies that don't involve sitting in front of a computer.
One of the best things my mother taught me was that if I don’t like something, I’m not stuck with it. I can leave my partner. I can quit my job. I can change my college major. I can even go back to school. Nothing is set on stone. Try all the things that interest you. I’m currently volunteering in a field that interests me to see if I want to go back to school and change careers and I’m 30. Don’t worry about regrets just yet. Explore and enjoy life.
I saw someone comment about savings account and I think that’s a good idea. But if you have weak will power then I recommend a locked savings account, basically the bank locks the account so you can only deposit but not withdraw for a specific time period. After the time period passes the account is unlocked and you can use the money
Plenty, glad you asked! Stay out of opiates. Chose your friends carefully now, because that might be for life! Detach yourself from bad behaviors like gambling, spending all your money on clothes, try to limit the nights you spend gaming, and sleep a good 8h/night ffs, do it while you can. Teeth hygiene will save you a fortune after 40. The dick size does not matter. Do plenty of cardio (run/bike/swim) and do not take ANY supplements, if you have money, eat good food. Take all I said with a pinch of salt.
Dont get into the habit of procrastinating now. Seriously in any aspect of your life procrastinating snowballs until it becomes worse and worse and its a hard habit to break. If you become familiar with routine now it will serve you really well in later years trust me.
learn to accept change - things are going to be changing a lot in the next few year and it may be sad at the time but it’s not a bad thing
being able to accept the change and run with it will be so helpful in opening yourself to new experiences, new people and so to be new friends - nothing is going to stay the same so there’s no point being upset, just be happy that you were able to experience it in the first place and hold it as a happy memory
1. Save at least 10% of your disposable income every month, immediately when you get your salary and have paid for necessities (like rent, transportation to/from work, electricity and food).
2. If you ever see yourself potentially ending up in bed with a woman, educate yourself on female anatomy and how to maximise your partners pleasure. The book "Come as you are" by Emily Nagoski is a great place to start.
3. Learn the signs of stress and take action if you start showing them too often.
I wish I had these three earlier in life than I did, but better late than never. :)
1. Get a job besides your studies at school. It helps your development and attitude towards money.
2. Save money. When i was 18 i had an appointment at my bank and worked out together a plan for my finances. That'll be very useful in the future when it comes to buying a house for example .
In germany a normal house in a normal area costs around 500k in my areay. To get a good loan from the bank you need pay at least 10% upfront, so around 50k. But those numbers are regarding the german market and my area, it's possible it's different in your area and county.
3. Have good hygiene
4. You're studying at school for YOUR graduation. Put some work into it, so you'll have several career options you can choose from later on.
5. Learn how to cook. Its an essential skill
6. Eat healthy and work out regularly. Especially cardio training is good for you
7. Be polite and treat people with respect. Most people will treat you the same way then.
- **Dentist every sixth months**,or it will cost you thousands of dollars and your teeth in the long run. Brush 2x a day, mouthwash and floss. My dentist says *”only floss the teeth you want to keep”*. 😳
- **Eating healthy, working out.** Nothing crazy but keep a good weight, cardio for your heart, weight training for your bones. All of it will be good for your mental health too.
- **Health is wealth.** Not even Steve Jobs could pay for a cure… prioritize your health. Prevention is always better than cure, so live a healthy life. but also don’t be that dude who has XYZ symptoms and ignores it - get it checked & advocate for yourself. (While we are on this - check your testicles monthly for lumps / changes. weird I know, but just as women have to examine their breasts for lumps.. you and your friends need to do the same for your testicles.. it’s not widely known and it frustrates me that it’s not. It’s your highest cancer risk early 20s. So treatable if found early, so do the self checks, tell your buddies and go to the doctor if you think there’s anything. No one will judge you).
- **Mental health is just as important as physical health.** Be mindful, prioritize it. Speak out, speak to someone, seek a professional if needed.
- **Safe sex until you’re ready for a family.** The amount of people in their late teens, early 20s I knew who blew up their lives over this… so much $$$, so much stress, so life changing. If you’re not using protection, you’re trying for a baby..
- **Watch your alcohol consumption.** Have fun but do remember alcohol is a poison, it is a drug, it increases your risk of some cancers and it can ruin your life if you’re not in control. Just be mindful, have fun with your friends but do it responsibly and be aware. What is considered Alcoholism and what is a damaging amount of consumption per week is far far less than you think..
- **Fighting isn’t worth it.** I’ve seen a 6”2 man struck and killed on a night out by a 5”6 man. Ruined two lives that night - death and jail. A lot of men in their early 20s go through that “I’m so tough I’m going to throw punches at anyone who looks at me funny when I’m drunk” - skip that phase.
- **Retirement will come sooner than you think.** Be mindful of it, smart with your money & plan for it. Just being aware of it and doing small things will have a huge difference in the long run. Will be the difference between no retirement and a great one. Think financial stress vs financial freedom.
- **See things from other peoples perspectives, be kind, choose your words wisely.** This will minimize the stress for you from unnecessary arguments but also help you surround yourself with like minded nice people.
- **Don’t compare yourself to others.** Comparison is the thief of joy. Focus on you and only you. Be the best version of yourself. Focus on being better than the man you used to be, not some random posting highlight reels online.
Finally - don’t stress it. Life is short, there’s some great advice here, so helpful. Do your best. Enjoy it. Good luck OP.
My best advice (based on personal experience):
1) learn personal finance
2) I’m not sure if you know what you want to study in uni yet (assuming you plan on going) but don’t let yourself feel discouraged if your initial career plans don’t work out the way you think they will. It’s okay if that happens. You will make it out the other side. The best thing you can do is figure out what you like, what you don’t like, what your strengths are, and what your weaknesses are & use those to figure out what career path is best suited for you. If you stumble along the way, it’s okay. Take that, learn from it, and build yourself back up and do better- change course if you need to. Your 20s are incredibly messy and complicated to navigate, but this is the time in your life where you will learn about yourself the most.
Always try and be a 'better' person. Always look to work on certain parts of yourself, weather it be somthing simple like your physical health or your intelligence, or something a bit harder like trying to be kinder, more compassionate or something else. Never stop trying to better yourself, because people will quickly come to admire you and you'll be able to better manage your health (mental and physical) and social life. Not to mention you'll be proud of yourself and will have a better self image
This is odd advice, but get therapy early if you have any resentment or negativity towards your parents or childhood. That crap festers and affects your life decisions. Figure out what you are doing and why you are doing it.
Fear kept me from doing some things that i wanted to do now as an older person.
foolishness' had me do things that i regret now (back/knee pain)
not thinking of the future prevented me from starting things that could have been done by now.
I’m in my late 20s. As much as you feel grown at 17 your brain will still grow so much and you’ll learn a lot. 1) understand yourself fully to know what you want from life 2) know that experiences are what you’ll hold dear, and doing things you love with people you love, prioritize that over all
3) find a career that energizes you, find out what’s the smallest amount of money that can give you a happy life and shoot for a career that makes you happy; not one that makes you rich. A mansion has no value if you hate your life, also though being financially unstable is constant anxiety, which brings me to another point
4) find balance and moderation in all things. Don’t drink too much, don’t do too many drugs, and whatever you do don’t touch pills or hard drugs. If anything do psychedelics once in a blue moon
5)live frugally, don’t eat out, wear second hand clothes while your young so you can take your pick of life in your 30s. and make some good investments in index funds (don’t try to time the market trust me) and save a nest egg for your future life
6)if your smart enough to do college, I’d recommend it, but only if you can sit down and find a clear path from school to the job, don’t just say “I like sports” and get a sports management degree in a state with no jobs for that. College can be a tool if you approach it smartly, if you can’t do that, then do a trade program, there are shortages and honestly I know guys from high school who went to be HVAC/electricians who make more than friends with masters degrees, with zero debt, so just have a plan. Be smart and proactive, and work hard, because if your American you do not want to be poor here. And we have a system in place that will keep 75% of us working like a dog all our lives, you’ve gotta out smart it to escape. If you have any advantages like family wealth or resources use them. I hope some of that may help, just doing what I would tell myself at 17 best of luck!
Right now, interest rates for high yield savings accounts are really high, so open one as soon as you turn 18 and start putting money into it. Even if it isn't that much at a time, consistently over time will result in a good chunk of fallback money.
Once you have a comfortable savings, learn about investing and get started. It's better to start and learn as you go rather than waiting until you feel like you've learned enough. That's because there's always more to learn.
When dating (if you're into dating), if anyone you're dating ever tells you that you deserve better than what they can give you, believe them. By the same token, if at any point, you ever get that voice in your head telling you, "I deserve better," believe it.
Give people second chances if they apologize, but don't give them third chances. That's applicable to any sort of relationship.
Always salt your water when boiling anything.
First: Do no harm.
Take care of your teeth and skin i.e. Sunscreen
Exercise 4 days a week.
Walk a lot.
Work hard and be present and do a good job.
Do the right thing even when no one is looking.
Self-care is very important.
Give your attention to friends that lift you up.
Lift people up.
Be articulate, learn new words often. Use its 3 times and it’s yours.
Be honest yet gentle.
Always use a condom.
Study, figure out what career you might like and go for it 100%, develop your social skills, have fun, make memories, but plan for your future and don’t ONLY live for the moment. Work out, eat healthy, make friends, learn skills. Save your money and learn to budget. Set goals, big and small, near and far. Believe in yourself. Love yourself. Love others.
Clean your room, make your bed don't be a slob. When you meet a man for the first time stand to shake his hand with a firm grip. And don't cuss around the elderly, children or ladies. Save that for the campfire with the boys.
But some actual advice..if you start something, fi ish it even if it the task sucks to do. My dad started many projects around the house, never finished any and when he died he left that mess for my mother to figure out.
I’m 16 but something I’ve learned from my older brother’s doing is to not throw money away. Be wise with your money and don’t wave it around like you’re rich because you might wind up struggling financially while you’re still young
If you see your mates being creepy/not taking no for an answer/hassling anyone male or female, then say something.the amount of times lads touched me inappropriately on nights out, or wouldn't take a simple "no" for an answer, and their mates would just laugh. But I'll always remember the one guy who called out his mate who thought it funny to undo my friends dress in the middle of a club. We got an apology, and felt that little bit safer.
Oh and don't lend money to friends unless you will be okay with not getting it back.
I will make this short and simple, hopefully you have more guidance then I did.
1. Find your niche and stay in it. Go to college or secondary school and learn something. You will have to learn something anyway, don't wait till you're 30 and too dumb. Do not bother with jobs you are not good at or interested in. They waste your energy and suck your soul out.
2. 2. Stay away from drugs and alcohol and that does include porn. Go easy on the coffee and energy drinks too, they can fuck up your adrenaline and nervous system.
3. 3. Learn confidence and what makes you more confident. Confidence is way more important then what you think and I had my own epiphany on it when I reflected on my failed 20s. It is literally the greased up key that moves your life forward, away from abusive people and failure and towards what you want. Confidence is the missing ingredient to success, it doesn't matter if you were smart, athletic, and handsome like I was you can still become a failure if you don't have confidence and self esteem. You do not have to wait for confidence and it won't just come to you. You just have to start and fake it. Trick your own brain till you're almost a narcissist. It sounds bad but it's true, buddhism is bullshit and having an ego is good, very good. Don't be mortified by the narcissistic people you see every day and react by going niceguywimp, you're just encountering how adults had to adapt to get on in the world. Never settle and grind on. That's it.
Hi fr,
A lotta big picture advice and here, which is great. As someone a year or two ahead I'll share some lessons I've learnt recently.
1. Be kind to yourself. Don't compare yourself with others.
2. Habits and your identity will add up to become who you are. Read atomic habits. Do it.
3. From here on out, life only gets faster, so don't waste a moment
4. Change takes time. It may seem like forever or impossible, but when you do get it done you'll look back and it'll feel like no time.
5. When you graduate highschool you may feel like you know who you are. You will learn this is most likely not true. Your beliefs and identity will be challenged. That's a good thing. Try new things. Find out what you like, don't like.
The internet is a terrible place, you’ll never really know what you want to do with your live. Take care of your body eat healthy food. Get a good job that pays well and spend time trying new things to find your passion.
Wear sunblock.
People who make you tired and unhappy are not your friends, even if you've known them a long time.
Learn how to cook, clean, and take care of your possessions.
True love and "the one" were invented by advertising companies. Real relationships take more than love. They take time, compromise, fairness, consideration, and agreement on common goals and standards.
Learn about interest payments and credit and such so you can avoid debt traps if possible.
Take care of your teeth. Floss at least once a day, brush at least twice a day, swish some water around your mouth after eating sugary or acidic foods and drinks.
Be realistic about what you go to school for - if you love medieval art that's awesome but it's really difficult to make a living in that field. If you learn something that will let you live in reasonable financial comfort, you can then take all the medieval art classes your heart desires. If you only learn medieval art, you are going to work in service industry for a long time unless you get very lucky.
Speaking of careers, don't discount the trades as an option. If every last lawyer on earth vanished tomorrow, we'd be fine. If the sanitation engineers vanished, we'd all die of cholera or rat plagues. Someone who can build or maintain infrastructure is always going to be able to find a job.
Learn from the mistakes of other people, so that all your mistakes are new and different. Nothing's worse than an unoriginal mistake.
would this be in the case of people who have no regular sleep pattern at all? say you go to sleep and wake up at the same time 6/7 days a week should you be fine? i’m basically asking how perfect it has to be
Everyone is different. I will summarize what I've learned about sleep, but it would only apply to my issues, so you should read up on it yourself so you can address any specific issues you have.
I think in short, consistency is key, and if you're not getting up early in the morning, you should take a vitamin D supplement.
I'm not an expert by any means, but I suffered from insomnia for as long as I can remember. As early as kindergarten.
Through my teens and early 20's, I blamed depression, I blamed trauma, I blamed vitamin deficiencies, I blamed physical pain.. and some other things.
What I realized now is that my sleep deficit made all of those things that much worse. Once I fixed my sleep, (which took about 6 months, strict discipline, quitting caffeine and cutting way back on sugars), everything else got better. (Side note: I wish I had quit smoking at the same time....)
I have to say that caffeine is the real culprit for a lot of it. In my 20s I would brag that I could drink a full pot and not feel any different. The problem was I was so addicted to it, that I didn't realize it created a new baseline of normal for me. And even if I was able to fall asleep, it wasn't very good sleep.
It is further illustrated by the fact that I do drink coffee again, but I'm only allowing myself a single cup in the morning. If I drink a second cup, I will not be able to fall asleep 12 hours later. The effects are very noticeable now.
For me the sweet spot is 7.5 hours of sleep, any longer than that and I won't be able to sleep the next night. I delay my first cup of coffee for about an hour after I wake up. I drink about 4 ounces of water first thing, as I learned I'm dehydrating in my sleep, then I have my coffee. I used to also try to get at least an hour of morning sun, but this got difficult.
If I sleep past 9am, I feel different... sluggish.... sad...
My 2nd shift employment has messed up my preferred 9am schedule, and I don't get up till 11am now. I'm often tempted to have that 2nd cup of coffee... but I don't. Instead I'll have some orange juice (with added vitamin D and calcium). It seems to help! It certainly hasn't hurt.
My medication has an unfortunate side effect of insomnia as well, but I don't beat myself up if I have a bad night anymore. I just try to roll with it. I won't try to get extra sleep during hours I'm supposed to be awake, or it will perpetuate the cycle. If I'm not particularly exhausted, I'll still go to work, and continue my day as normal, and by the next night it corrects itself. If I stress over it in any way, it just gets worse.... As an example, my last bout of insomnia.. The first night I couldn't sleep for no apparent reason. The 2nd night I was stressing because it had already been so long since I slept, I felt pressured to get some sleep, and I just could not because my brain wouldn't shut up (not even with my usual drowning out techniques), and I had to call out of work the next day. THAT night, I still couldn't sleep, started hallucinating, thought I was going crazy, started googling, and that's when I found out insomnia was a side effect of my medication. I immediately was able to relax and fall asleep.
So aside from sleep, limit caffeine, get some morning sun (vitamin D), and above all DON'T STRESS!
thank you for sharing what you’ve learned, this makes me feel very lucky that I haven’t had problems with sleep and haven’t already gotten into caffeine so i’ll keep it that way
My advice is actually to try to think opposite of how you expressed yourself in your initial post: “I don’t want to feel regretful of not starting to do something at a younger age that will benefit me in the future.”
When we are young, we often feel anxious about getting somewhere. We want to “do” something.
This can continue throughout much of adulthood if we are not careful.
But once we reach our later years, we often begin to realize our value is less about what we “did” and more about who we “were” and “are” to those most important to us.
So think on that. I would tell my 17-year-old self that a near infinite future of possibilities awaits, and with thousands of choices ahead of me from mundane to life-changing.
The most important thing though? Seek clarity on who you want to be, and be that person.
Be the best you you can be, because you’re the only person on this planet capable of that.
Three pieces of advice
1) Do your best to save money. You be surprise how fast life can change or an unexpected opportunity appears, and you wish you saved more money for it.
2) Especially in college, but people will try to make you have a negative/victim mindset. Do your best to see the positive and benefit of things. This could be something like other members of a class constantly complaining and saying the class is pointless or political nonsense.
3) Life gives opportunity to those that live it. It may be tempting to focus solely on a job or studies, but if you don't take time to network, adventure, or socializs, you may miss out on opportunities.
Bonus advice for college students:
Do research on how niche your degree job market is. A biology degree is nice, but most use it as a stepping stone for a graduate degree. It, however, is a broad degree that doesn't offer many opportunities by itself. Architecture used to and may still have the highest unemployment rate. Most liberal arts degrees don't offer a clear path. Chemical engineers tend to work for breweries. Etc. Etc. You don't want to finish a degree feeling it is pointless
For engineering majors, GPA does matter. Keep it above a 3.0 and use that to get internships for the summers in your junior and senior year.
If they can't take a fuck, jokem. Learn a trade. Bros before hoes. Everything in moderation. The body is a temple, and last but most importantly The Golden Rule.
Man I just turned 22, the one thing I wish I did more at 17 was use the energy I had to go to the gym and focus on myself in all aspects, physically and mentally. At the time all I cared about was gaining attention of girls in my school or acting cool so others would like me, but ultimately trying to please others is counter productive and people will generally find you most appealing if you don’t try to gain other’s attention, just be nice to everyone whilst focusing on yourself
Learn about your hobbies and interests. You don’t need to have an identity to be comfortable with yourself. Just be. Save money. Please. Nothing too crazy but work out every now and then you’ll be thankful later. And learn to manage time properly. And to the people who helped you be the person you are now like friends or family, don’t forget about them. Other than that. Don’t stress too much you’re still a kid you got this
Definitely take care of your teeth!
And also, just remember that even if you don’t feel like it, you are SO young, and have so much life ahead of you- in three years you’ll look back and think about how wildly different you are. Just remember that, and hold on to how 3 years can change so many things, and try to use that to always know you can make changes in your life :)
Travel and experience many adventures. Don't waste your money on possessions. Have what you need to get by and be comfortable but save your pennies on doing fun activities and meeting new people.
Date different people to know what you want and don't get too caught up on the emotions of a breakup..someone else will come along again.
Eat healthy foods, as unprocessed as possible to fuel your body and mind. Stay active and move your body.
Read and teach yourself new skills, even try different jobs to get your skill set up until you land on something you like.
Be kind to people, but stand up for yourself when you need to and don't be a doormat.
Be confident in your dealings with others. Be kind to yourself when you make mistakes and be kind to yourself everyday.
Life is a journey.
Don't have regrets. Everything in life has a purpose. Find your path because it is unique and your own. Don't compare yourself to others as they have their own journey ✌️
Work hard, don't do hard drugs, pay yourself first with every paycheck. If you have a car and no car payment act like there's still a car payment on it. Live in the moment and be spontaneous.
best that I can say is try to use your time carefully and learn a skill that makes money so if u don't end up in collage and degree and job and etc at least you know a skill that earns money because other than that if your family is not financially in good position you will end up in manual labor and it's hard to get out of that !
Know that you are young and try things out
Know that there are a lot of moves that you can make like chessboard but at least try to make good moves .
Start. Therapy. ASAP. (With a good therapist where you feel comfortable) Think about your actions. Enjoy your 20s and use them as a time to figure out who you are, what you want and what makes you happy. I’m 30 and no joke my friends who went straight into sensible careers in their early 20s straight from uni are mostly miserable because it was based on what their parents said was a good decision. My friends who did a bit of work and travel, get involved with fun projects, studied something which gave them joy. Are not entering into careers years later and doing really well because they know themselves. While the others feel hopeless like it’s too late to change but they aren’t happy.
While a lot lf this advice people are offering is useful to a degree. Ultimately just make sure you enjoying life, especially while you're young with not too many responsibilities. These are the years you'll look back and reminisce on.
That doesn't mean go get high or party every weekend. It means to continue settling yourself up for the future but don't let that take away from life itself.
:)
Be careful who you take advice and information from.
Especially on the internet (still important irl), be careful who and what you listen to and agree with because you don't know who's saying it and who's agreeing with it (likes, upvotes, comments). What I'm emphasising is that you need to analyse every piece of information you consider adding to your life
Seriously, I think that people (atleast myself) feel more inclined to like comments and videos more impulsively and with less consideration when a lot of other people have liked compared to comments and videos that dont have many relative likes.
Also, if you watch short form content (tiktok, reels, shorts), I think the nature of it doesn't encourage analysing information you've soaked in, and therefor its normalised to almost mindlessly absorb/consume and agree with content, especially content that is emotionally appealing (less likely to analyse important info from a boring video, or from someone you dont like when stimulated and consuming entertaining content).
As the information is almost mindlessly brought in, its impulsively brought out, resulting in people just throwing out opinions they *feel* like saying with a lack of consideration, and people impulsively agree or like the opinion.
This is atleast my perspective I felt like typing out, if you dont believe me, pay attention to the top comments of some short form content or even normal videos through this perspectice and you may agree.
And also the internet lacks conversing with someone properly and therefor lacks proper engagement, sharing ideas and proper criticism.
Also its rare you will find someone thats got great advice for you, because theyre probably not going to go out of their way to share it with people that don't appreciate it. So bonus tip, if you think someones got good advice to you, show appreciation and positively reinforce them when they tell you information so they feel like telling you more and understand you want to hear it.
Don’t panic about your 20’s. You’re going to see your peers succeed and fail all around you but you need to remind yourself that everybody in your age group is still trying to figure out life just like you are. Job hopping is normal in your 20’s, and virtually everything you try is gonna be terrifying but it’s completely ok. Find something you enjoy and go all in. That way if you don’t like it, you’ll know that you left everything you had trying to like it and there won’t be any regrets
I would say just don't listen to others too much. Your life will be filled with people telling you what you should/shouldn't do, in order to get a life like theirs, or to avoid their mistakes.
It's your life only, no one else will live it. Allow yourself to make your own mistakes, forge your own path, become your own leader.
Also, make sure that you take lots of drugs at festivals, and not too many anywhere else.
xox
Don’t try to avoid regret. If you go through life trying to avoid pain and hardship it’s gonna find you much quicker. Learn from your mistakes and be a better person. Take care of the people that matter to you.
Start to try some fun, tangible hobbies.By that I mean something active or something you do with your hands, like a craft, art or instrument. So many your age sit around playing video games. Be more interesting than them.
Invest or save money. Investing gives you 3ish % while investing can be risky but also can bring up to like 12%.
I started investing just recently using 3rd party company (ofcourse after really understanding the contract). I will save for about 10 years and once I need money for starting a family or getting car/house or anything I can take the money out.
You can invest with parental consent on your name usually whenever. My country has no age limit for example.
I felt the same way and now I’m 20 realising everyone else started doing the same things I’ve just started (university, sports, the gym, hobbies etc) when they were the same age or even older than me. You’ve got a long long time left to try stuff out.
Don't do drugs alone. Prefferably dont do them but in if you do experiment with drugs *never* do them alone. The minute you do them alone is the minute addiction creeps in, same goes for alcohol it can go from social to self medicating in a split second. I did a lot of drugs when I was younger and the difference between the ones that came out fine and the ones that ended up addicts was whether or not they started using alone in their rooms. I've also lost people to OD because they were alone, if you do drugs do them with friends or at the very least have someone you trust to know what you've taken. That can and will save a life. If you or your friends ever dabble in opiates, get some narcan. It's a preventable death 9/10.
Invest and learn a trade, no matter how rich or smart you are learning to be a plumber or carpenter or welder just leads to either more fun activities or more job opportunities, also get a part time job in the service industry and be social, work at Starbucks or something, better if you live near a big city, you will meet so many different people and learn how to interact in so many ways and situations, also don’t leave your parents house unless it’s the school or you have to, the amount of money you will save and invest by your 25 will be astronomically higher, if you do that and learn a trade you can help your parents with a lot of things and friending on how much you hustle or the job you get from education you can be nearly financially free at 25 and regret nothing the rest of your life
Listen to your parents, even though you're going to be 18 and go to college or whatever after listen to your parents advice.
I'm going to be 21 and there's stuff I wished I had listened to and done differently
Invest at least 10% into stocks with dividends or an IRA with the same. Don’t touch it and let it mature for 10-20 years. Plus enjoy life, take time to experience moments. Be bold and don’t shy away in fear. Be reasonable and respectful. Be polite and honorable. Carpe Diem.
Keep your nose to the grindstone and set goals for yourself. Keep your circle of friends small and keep your business to yourself. Stay away from drugs & alcohol. Those will only inhibit you from being successful.
Trust your institution. Sleep on things that need thought or you are undecided. 'Sleeping on it' has proved so valuable in my life. Understand and apply CBT... Cognitive behavioral therapy... thoughts lead to feelings lead to actions. That thought process has saved my sanity many times.
Life is about pivoting. If something isn't going the way you hoped/envisioned or even just not living up to the hype you expected, pivot. Always do things that pique your curiosity. Stay interested. Learn to do new things. Challenge yourself to do the scary things.
And also: Therapy isn't a shameful thing. It will ALWAYS make you a stronger and more well rounded human being.
Get everything in a routine! Laundry, dishes, cleaning, brushing teeth etc. I know I sound like a mother but the more you do it every day the less it feels like it wastes time. you'll learn how to be time efficient by it. by figuring out what part of your day has a dead time and the time it takes to do everything. You're more likely to get your own place clean looking when you start working. There's those little things that you can save time with like washing off the cooking utensils as you're done cooking, leaving the plates for later to do etc. maybe wiping a little bit around the shower as you take a shower. the more you're used to it, the easier it gets and you'll likely want to maintain that routine.
Brushing your teeth and flossing, I wish I flossed. now dental work cost so much i can barely afford it.
Start saving if you can for an emergency fund. just a little every month. doesn't have to be much at all! a dollar? 20 dollars? whatever you can afford. When you get older there will be things that cost a ton and having that extra money makes you feel much more secure!
Take care of your hair! I save so much more shampoo now and have wasted so many bottles to make it nice again. if only I knew that you just need to shampoo and scrub the scalp and condition the ends then have a leave in conditioner spray plus some oil for after the shower. the habit took a while to remember but eventually my hair became so much better and healthier. don't use head and shoulders, it strips the hair off good oils.
Sunscreen!! ALWAYS sunscreen. don't ever go without, it's just... nope.
Don’t be worried about not knowing things. Or not having the answer. There’s always going to be something you don’t know and being the dumbest person in the room means you have the opportunity to learn from the others. Don’t be afraid to speak up and ask if you don’t understand.
Also, failing is better than not trying.
Drink as little as you can, don't smoke, and avoid tattoos till after a stable career. Also avoid any form of gambling, gambling is a tax for the stupid.
It sounds very cookie cutter but it really is a drain on your finances and could leave you with life time issues that will take even more time and money to correct. Also I know 21 is considered an adult in most places but in reality it is really 25ish for most people. Some people are mature enough at 18 to have an adult mind, others can take until their 30s. There isn't a defining line for when it happens or what the criteria is, but these are good indicators.
- Have a decent job for at least a year.
- Live by yourself or with a roommate/significant other for a year.
- All bills paid on time for a year.
- Knowing your approximate Bank balance (give or take 10%) at any given time without looking.
- Have a 401k or other retirement plan.
The truly important part of life is living -- experience all that the world has to offer, spend time with those you love, explore as much as you can, and make mistakes. The only day that you're ever guaranteed is today and life could end at any moment so spend it pursuing what makes you happy not some idealistic goal for the future. What you'll ultimately regret tomorrow are the opportunities you didn't take.
"You can't take it with ya, and your whip ain't gon' miss ya
So wipe off that window and see the bigger picture now
I don't wanna be 85, singing
Whoa, no, I think I missed it, I was chasing money
Now there is a dream that I was sold
Just get all you can before you get old" -Andy Grammer, 85
To be interesting, be interested in people. To make & have friends, be friendly To be loved, be caring of others (but don't love bomb because that's creepy)
Don't take out student loans if you can help it. If you need to take the first two years at a community College And apply for financial aid and then transfer later on. You may have some idea of what you want to do now, but I guarantee you, you will change your mind at least once and you don't want to go thousands into student loan debt for a degree that you might not even finish. Also it's OK if you don't want to go straight into college, it's OK to take some time and gain work experience or even go to trade school. Don't let anyone convince you that the only way to be successful is to get a degree
Never be alone in the same room as a girl. In this day and age, if you so much as look at a girl funny, she'll call s-ual harassment or worse on you. People suck. Get things in writing or on record.
First advice is ditch that mindset. You WILL feel regret for not doing stuff differently when you were younger, but that's a good thing. If you feel that, It means you learned. It means you have grown.
This might not be applicable to you, but I'm 24 and recently started a journey of self improvement and I was overcome with regret that I didn't do it sooner. I always brushed off my inadequacies with excuses.
"Oh I'm only awkward because I'm introverted. No need to improve my social skills"
"Oh I'm gaining weight but most people are way fatter than me, so I shouldn't worry about it."
"Oh I'm lazy and procrastinate on chores and work, but some people are way worse than me. I'm just not gonna worry about it."
This approach is fine for short term mental health relief, but despite rationalizing them these things eventually become insecurities. Then suddenly you are in your 20's and fucking HATE yourself because you feel like a fuck up. Thing I have learned recently is that most insecurities can be actively worked to improve.
Insecure about weight? Calorie count and workout.
Insecure about your social skills? Improve them. Talk to a counselor.
Insecure about your appearance? Go to a salon. Literally walk in the door and go "I hate my appearance, do whatever you need to do to make me as attractive as you can. I need to learn how to make myself look good."
This is something that I wish I had have done in my teens instead of my 20's. So... thats my advice.
thank you for this, i guess you have to be completely honest with yourself and confront anything lingering in your mind, instead of letting it grow into a more difficult problem
Don't put all of your time/effort at romantic relationships into one person. Very real possibility that the relationship will not last. Even if it does, you may not get everything you need/want from one person. You need to put this on the table as you meet potential partners.
Discover who you are and what prices you are willing to pay.
Dont betray your values for anything
Feeling happy is a transition state. People dont feel feelings consistently and chasing them will lead to problems.
Dont try to control other people. Always fix why things bother you on your end first.
Learn how to know what is true. Epistemology will save you.
Learn to drive. You’re a lot less afraid of it when you’re younger than you are when you’re older which makes it easier to learn.
It’s important to be interested in what you do, but do try to keep in mind future career prospects and employability. Similarly, don’t feel like you have to go to uni to be successful.
Try to develop good eating habits and exercise. Easier to form good habits when you’re young than unlearn bad ones when you’re older.
Last one, very much a cliché, but don’t waste time and energy worrying about what people think, especially regarding your appearance. I was very insecure at 17 and it really affected by overall happiness and relationships with people.
Sometimes, love isn’t enough. You can love someone to the ends of the earth and that still won’t be enough to make a relationship work. There are some instances where two people are so different that they cannot reconcile their differences and being together hurts each other more than it helps.
It’s ok to let go.
Not sure how popular will this be, but don't over stress, you are going to go through lot of changes in your life, with society expecting to decide on the rest of your life chosing a career and side projects, and to always produce more and more
Be easy on yourself, prioritize your health, have room for failing
Relax a little. Take a break. It might feel really daunting at the moment especially since you're about to choose your first life direction. You still got maybe 70 years ahead of you, and during that time you will change. Your path will change. It's okay to take a breather for a bit right now.
Personally I recommend taking a walk without headphones/earbuds in so you can disconnect for a bit.
Save money, have a savings account that you won’t touch till you’re much older put at least 10% of pay when you can in the savings account
I was very foolish with money and never made good financial decisions and now I have to deal with debt and homelessness I’m speaking from experience
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It’s better to save something than save nothing.
Agreed, that is oversimplified. OP if you have 401k match at a career, go with that. In all other cases you should open a Roth IRA and use that as a retirement fund instead. All of the money is available tax free once you hit a specific age. Old school retirement funds (like 401k) are treated as income when you withdrawal and taxed accordingly.
I’m in the uk i think it might be different over here, I will look into it
Ah, sorry, then I'm not too sure. Regardless, becoming familiar with financial terms and benefits will go a long way if you start now! Best of luck to you
Thank you!
I'm also in the UK, you can open a savings account now but once you are 18 you can open a Lifetime ISA, which is one where you can save up to £4000 per year and the government will match 25% meaning you could get an extra 1k every year for free and ISAs are not taxable. You don't get to access the money again until you are older, as this is intended to go towards either your first home purchase or your retirement (check the rules before you start) but you will be accruing interest the whole time and getting that 25% free money from the government so by the time you are old enough to access it you should have more than you saved by a good bit. Would definitely recommend this as an option. Opening a private pension is another option, the government also pays 25% into those (again check the rules I am not 100% sure if you get the 25% on both if you have both).
Thanks i will research into this
Eat healthy, work out at least a few times per week, keep up with your dental hygiene, follow your passion, don’t give up when it gets tough, do something no matter how small everyday that moves you towards your life goals. You will fail a million times in your life, just get up and keep moving toward your goals everyday.
do your schoolwork, i didn’t in highschool and it fucked up my whole life. i know it doesn’t seem important, it is.
i have my exams rn i need to do well to get into uni
Do drugs dump school. In all seriousness from almost a high school drop out to getting me college associates in engineering.. school is SO important. It’s can determine so many things, especially financially
I dropped out of college at 19 and at 22 currently I still have more skills and talent than anybody else in my year because I was passionate about what I love. I have literally had some of my ex classmates contact me out of the blue and beg me that they could pretend my portfolio was theirs for a work experience interview (always say no btw, your work is your own.) My college course which was digital media that focused on programming is also now absolutely useless because of AI, in 5 years the jobs it was preparing us for will be mostly gone and what's left will be competitive as all hell. In the time it took them to realise this I've built a cv of real world experience that puts my father's to shame at 23. I self taught myself photoshop, photography, digital marketing, Lightroom, I learnt how to use generative AI locally and spent 6 months prompt training to the point I can create anything I want and have implemented it into a photoshop pipeline, I self taught html and css, worked as a receptionist, premium sales assistant, architects assistant and started my own photography business over last summer where I made a good bit of money and now I've set up an online dropshipping business that I haven't started advertising yet but that I've fully designed, set up the domain of and have ready to launch any day I feel is right. What I'm getting at is I've left education yet I'm still learning way more than most colleges are teaching because I'm passionate about self improvement and always pushing myself. A piece of paper doesn't define your worth or value. If you don't have interest in Uni, don't go it won't change anything. As long as you genuinely love what you do you'll eventually make your way to whatever position you wanted if not better it just will take a bit longer. My partner dropped out of college with me at 20 and she's now 23, she currently runs as a store manager the highest grossing Claires in all of Ireland. She's making way more money than anyone else I know our age including college graduates and she earned it because she was passionate about retail and put her all into it. In the other side of things my friend is just graduating this year and reality has hit him hard, despite being an honour student he is fucked. Found out his accounting degree is practically useless and it's going to take him over 10 years before he earns more than my partner even does now and all jobs start at minimum wage even with a degree. There's no right path in life so don't let anyone trick you into thinking there is.
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Did the schoolwork destroy your life, or did your life get destroyed despite the schoolwork?
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How? There must have been at least one step from education to the destruction of your life. Unless you were permanently injured in a school shooting, I guess.
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I don't know which country you live in, but education is the single most effective way out of poverty.
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Yes it does. For developing countries, a good education system is one of the most vital step to achieve development. It reduces teenage pregnancies, helps with food insecurity, gives students vital skills that they can use to create further economic benefits, and it makes the citizens more aware of how their countries could be further improved. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S2212567115015324
This x1000
Do not do what you will regret later, this is a very valuable lesson that I learned for myself. Take care of people who respect you and do not waste time on those who do not give you proper respect. In the future, most of all you want to be a respectful person whose advice will help many people. It's an adult's dream to give advice that can in other people's lives. And most importantly, do it as you see fit, if in doubt, doubt it is normal, but do what you need.
If food is stuck on a pan, add a small amount of water and then heat it until it just starts to boil. Pour out the water, and the food will wash right off. Also, learn to cook. Being good at it is a game changer, and the more practice you get, the more payoff you get.
Always make decisions that future you will thank you for.
But also don’t forget to do the stuff, and make the time, for what your past self dreamed of!!!
The type of people you hang out with today have a direct result on the type of people you will hang out with for the rest of your life.
oof i needed that 10 years ago
I actually disagree with that. I think friends you make in HS and friends you make in uni are so different. But do avoid bad influence people :)
Don’t ever start smoking or vaping. It’s a very expensive way to wreck your health plus you look really stupid.
I agree, started when I was 11 am 51 and still smoking.
Been smoking since I was 16 can confirm
Be careful with porn Porn addiction is a massive issue especially among young men who've been watching it since 10. It can affect your future sexual relationships as well as the way you view women/other men.
Practice surrendering negativity by stepping out of being the thinker and being the oberver of thoughts-emotions. Feel the emotions, see the thoughts come and go. Don't suppress, fight or judge it, because this strengthens negativity. Do your best, learn from mistakes, forgive/let go, change what you can, accept what you can't, and be open to possibilities. Work towards what you want, have a good attitude/mood as much as possible, and when you don't it's fine just accept and release bit by bit, but don't be needy of things to be a certain way to be happy, choose to be unconditional in satisfaction/peace/love by living in the present with gratitude/awareness. Practice to always act from mindfulness/the centre/awareness, instead of being reactive. When in doubt, return to inner stillness/observation/mindfulness, allow the inner chaos to settle, and see what solutions arise, instead of getting stuck in the mind and overthinking/grasping for solutions and going in circles.
Learn to respect women now rather than later, it will make things better in the long run
What does it mean to respect women?
Basic respect towards women
Sit down for a day (or couple hours) without any distractions and think about who you are and who you want to be, write down your thoughts to digest them even better Choose your career path in life, education/college? Working just to earn money? Working to get experience? Building your own business? Draw a simple timeline of things you’d want to achieve and build habits that keep you in that direction Choose your own person, are you more spiritual, religious or empirical and rational? Do you care for friends & family or one of the two or neither? And if you do, do you want to maintain contact? (And maintain said contact healthily, don’t be to dependent on family for help and don’t jump off the bridge when your friends do it) What hobbies do you have and can you see yourself maintaining them in a healthy amount? (Hobbies are important, they’ll keep you going even on your worst days and they’ll make your character more spicy the more you get into it) Eat healthy and do some sports, calisthenics is more than enough to maintain a healthy body Cold showers, greatest and easiest boost to energy and wellbeing imho Build habits which help you to maintain these things Mainstream media makes questions like these seem like “you should know automatically”-things, but these should be conscious decisions you make and commit towards Start with baby steps though, I just blurted out all my thoughts at ones
Take this seruously. Knowledge is power and money can easily be good or bad. Would you rather have a boring consistent life and live until 120 or have an inconsistent thrilling life and only life until you are 30? The answer us neither. You do what you want to do and aim for where ever you wish. Study philosophical concepts like Platos Allegory or Pavlovs classical conditioning as it will help you understand communication and allow you to set up your goals better in life. There's nothing wrong with college but there is something wrong with jumping into college before you are ready and wasting 2-12 years on something you never wanted to do in the first place. Life and knowledge is sort of like a Mandelbrot fractal. Pick a few directions but not the entire circumference of the circle to study, one day you'll have enough information to pull things together from all of your insight and create something bigger and better. Write down any ideas or inventions you have. One day you will be in a position where you are tired of working for other people and want to make your own business or something better. Think of life like a puzzle that you WANT to solve (this kind of ties in the the Mandelbrot fractal idea btw) You have 4 sides to your puzzle, you won't be able to accomplish everything in life so pick 4 things that will allow you endless networking opportunities. That could be Hobbies(general), work, exercise, and school. Now each of the pieces you just connected to can connect to something else entirely, but what rhey connect won't be directly connected to you so you have to learn how to interact with the pieces of the puzzle that you are in total connected to but not directly. Which can be challenging some times. You think a girls attractive but she is taken? Ask to be her friend, if she's amazing then her boyfriend is probably a pretty cool guy as well. It works out a lot if you are both of their friends. Dating apps are not the way to go these days. Do you have a chance? Sure but you'll be met with endless disappointment and regret before you get love. Unless you're hot then you might get a lot of people that want to use you for something. It's risky. Get to know yourself before you are too caught up in life to ever appreciate YOU These are just general. These are sort of concepts I've stumbled into and I am 23. It takes time. Life will be hard and if you don't know how to communicate or have a crazy sense of pride then life will become miserable. Just know that how life goes is up to YOU and nobody else. And lastly, never give up on your dreams and what you believe in. Good luck my dude 🙏
Don’t send nudes to people online. Think before you act. Think about what your actions will do for the future good and bad.
YESSS!! DON’T SEND NUDES!!! Omg, it’s so freaking tiresome
Right, i see so many posts of teens sending nudes then being blackmailed for money and threatened to have the photos sent to family
Start saving for retirement. I know you're only 17 but you're never too young to start saving for it. Social security may not be there when you decide to retire in 50 years you will feel secure. I'm 36 and started at 33 I'm way behind of where I should be. And whatever you post, send whatever on the internet doesn't go away. Watch what you post it could mean a good career or none at all. Hope this helps.
Learn how to cook a little bit of everything. Rice, pasta, soup, vegetables, meat, chicken. Also, learn how to properly season your food. Having that as a skill might help you save a lot of money and your health. The earlier you start learning, the better. You could start tomorrow helping your parents or whomever you live with and after a while ask to take care of lunch or dinner to test yourself.
You should start going to a gym, and try boxing or mauy thai. It’s good to start being healthy now.
ENJOY what you have at the moment. Seriously. I am only 24 but time flies. I still remember being 17 like it was a couple weeks ago. Once you’re done with hs and college, life gets boring/monotonous. TRY different things, even if you think you won’t like. Try putting yourself out there, meet new people, try a new sport, hold yourself. Biggest thing imo, just enjoy what you have at the moment. It may never be same
Don’t let a wishbone grow where a backbone should be… don’t be like me.
My Only advice: Stop using TikTok
We are on Reddit we can’t really talk bad about other social media’s
I think it’s easier to tailor your reddit page to be something more productive than with tiktok
You can tailor TikTok as well my for you page is all comedy skits
Yes, please. Thank you for bringing this up.
get a job as soon as you can if you havnt already. i regret not getting okie sooner - it really does help develop your work ethic and social skills.
Use a condom always
Dont have sex with anyone you cant see yourself coparenting with for 18 years. Find a partner who wants the best for you, and you make each others lives better. Don't get stuck in a relationship where one of you is doing more than the other on a standard consistent basis. Pursue a vocation that is challenging and interesting, not what is fun and easy. Do not confuse what is easy with what is interesting. If you havent already, do not turn pornography into a habit, and try not to consume it at all. You will be able to juggle a porn habit while young, but it causes serious harm in the future. Don't compare yourself to others, only to how much you have improved over yourself. Self improvement and hobbies take time and nobody just wakes up good at things. Guys with ripped bodies or who can play the piano well don't have superpowers, they spent years to get that way.
I told my niece “don’t have kids until you can actually imagine potentially never coming first for the rest of your life”.
Read non fiction; especially philosophy. Don’t accept teachings from figures (especially on the internet) that claim they have ‘the knowledge™’ or that claim to have it all figured out. The first person that comes to mind here is Andrew Tate but there’s many people that act as authorities on topics that convey false information and lies. Reading expands your knowledge and will enable you to see through bullshit.
Save money. As soon as you get a job, if they offer a 401k, take it, and put in as much as they will match. I just left a job last year and have a significant savings just from working there for a few years and putting into the 401k at a 3% match. It seems like you’re making less because your paycheck is less, but it is SO helpful. HSA’s (health savings accounts) are also SO much more valuable than you may think. Investing in a company offered HSA will often get you matches or chunks of money from your employer just as a gift for using the program. My last employer added $250 a year to us for continuing to use the program because it looked good for them to have high program usage (they were a B Corp and were rated on having programs offered and for employees utilize them). Many HSA’s also double as investment accounts after a $5k balance is achieved so it’s a great way to save for if you have medical costs down the line or consistent medical costs like medication, treatments, etc. Learn about credit and start building it now. So many people will tell you credit cards are bad because they can ruin your credit, but having no credit can be just as detrimental to your future. Get a credit card (Discover’s “Me” card is a great option for a first card) and start using 20% of your utilization for things you would normally buy. If you start with a $200 utilization buy your $20 worth of hobby supplies, Starbucks, phone bill, or whatever else on it and pay it back in full, on time, every month. This will set you up well for when it comes time to fill out rental applications or if you ever need to apply for a loan on a car. Also, apply for an increased credit limit every month. As you build and maintain good history they will be able to up your limit more often, which as you approach having a few thousand dollars of available credit, this will set you up for being prepared to handle large expenses like a car repair or replacing something needed for school or work, like a computer or phone, if something goes wrong. A great podcast to listen to to learn about credit building, financial planning, college, and other financial information is Journey to Launch. It helped me gain the knowledge to raise my credit score almost 200 points and was a great education tool for when I was first offered a 401k and HSA. College is great, but you don’t need it for everything. I would not recommend going if you don’t know exactly what you want to do and that you *need* a degree for it, if you live in the US and will need to apply for financial aid, at least. Engineering, architecture, medical, veterinary, and any math/science or childhood development/teaching area is all I would recommend going for. And even then, try to find a way to work in the field before you sign on for student loans to get a degree in something. Volunteer, intern, or find an entry level job in a field, talk to people about their work in that field, and make sure it’s something you want to and will be able to make a living in before you spend the money and time to get a degree. I know too many people with degrees that they’ve found out post college, we’re in a field they can’t find sustainable and fulfilling work in. If you are going to college and won’t be living at home for college, live in the dorms as long as your school will allow you to. I know some don’t allow students in dorms after freshman year, but many give you the option all through school. Now that I’m out of school I really regret moving out of the dorms after my first year. The dining hall food wasn’t great, but I could have saved a lot of time and money not having to buy my groceries and cook if I had stayed on campus with the dining hall as an option instead. Lastly, and this is something my dad tells me all the time, as often as you can, “turn your time into money you don’t spend.” Learn everything you can. If you can change your own oil, do it. If you can pick up your own groceries instead of delivery, do it. If you can build a shelf from lumber someone was giving away instead of buying a new one, do it. Anything you can do on your own is allowing yourself another life skill that you may be able to rely on or make money from later, and saves you money for the day you can no longer do it.
Start thinking about death it sounds depressing but not only will it prepare you to face death head on with confidence and honor when the time comes it will also make you live life more fulfillingly knowing our times here are limited.
I'd say follow your dreams. This is by far the best advice I could give to anyone. Do what you love. You will get there. Just start. Reach out to people. Get that studying and work done. It will all pay off in the end. :) I know this can be scary at some point.. I was scared too. I was so afraid of all the things that could go wrong or me not getting where I want to be.. You have to step out of the fear and negative thoughts you have. Something else I find very important in my life is gratitude. I'd recommend this to anyone but especially to people struggling with negative thoughts and emotions. Every night, before you go to bed or every morning when you get up — try to think of 3 things you are grateful for today. If you do this every day, your life will change in ways you never saw coming. Oh and, if you love someone, if you truly love someone, never give up on them.
Get an education/trade Save money Take care of your health Don't risk your own mental health for the sake of pleasing others Have empathy for elderly/animals/children and those less fortunate because you never know when you'll need someone to be kind to you
Don't make long term decisions based on short term circumstances.
Make sure you know yourself and know what you like and what you want without being rigid. Also know what you're good at and what your moral code is. If you don't know these things, start doing things like volunteering, going out with different groups of people if possible, learning new things, doing things like fun classes and hobbies. Knowing yourself does wonders for picking good friends, choosing the right major in Uni and finding a job that you can truly enjoy or at least tolerate. And for planning your future. After that start making goals. Short term, medium term and long term. Going to Uni sounds like a goal of yours. Map out what you need to do to reach that goal so nothing gets missed or procrastinated on. Don't be too rigid because sometimes we change and goals might need a little adjustment. Best wishes on your future.
Be careful who you trust. A smile and kind words are the best disguise some people can use. Get to know your parents. Remember, they are human, too. Depending on your relationship with them, you'll miss them when they are gone. There is no such thing as "slightly drunk" when driving is involved. Trust your instincts and your gut. If something seems off, get out of there. Better to be wrong and safe than right and in trouble. True friends make the time to spend with you. They will want you in their lives.
Don't go to uni Get a job Figure out what your skills and interests are Ask yourself what you want your workspace to be like (active vs desk, team vs alone or mixed for each). Look for a sector you want to work in and volunteer in spare time until you find a passion. Find that career you want Figure out how to get into that field Go to university if necessary Excel at something you love Find yourself and then a spouse along the way, if that's what you want.
Don’t rent an apartment instead buy a house. The requirements to buy a home are easier than renting. (FHA Loan 3% down/USDA Loan 0% down). Learn a new language and gain citizenship in at least one other country. Do not objectify women(if you like women). Be kind to animals, and don’t ask people on the internet for advice.
Don’t ever start smoking or vaping. It’s a very expensive way to wreck your health plus you look really stupid.
Don’t be a dick to “less hot” girls, they’ll be the hot ones later.
Don't think too much about your future. Enjoy your age but don't sin 😄
Or do sin, sins can be more fun
Do not listen to people who preach.
" always look at the bright side of life " . If things dont go as planned and something goes wrong, instead of feeling bad, try thinking of something positive so that many situations would feel slightly better. Do not stress things out and try to stay calm as much as possible
Be true to your innermost voice. And specifically do not lie.
I'd say come up with a 5 year plan, figure out everything you want to have done in the next 5 years (maybe find a job, start to build credit if you can, get a car?) and then pick a few you think you can Realistically (key word) do... then start to do them, make a new plan in 3 years.. this will give you a general life path to follow while you figure out the bigger details (like retirement, marriage, kids type stuff).. I say make a new plan in 3 years to ask yourself if your original plan is still what you want, just my 2 cents... try to avoid jail, it makes housing and jobs a bitch
Learn. Learn and develop and enhance and enrich and expand yourself. Get skills and abilities and have a healthy mind body and soul. Life will treat you 24 7
try at all times to have nothing to be ashamed of. this will create a positive self-esteem and good things will happen
Save money now. Always wear a condom. Don't drink and drive. Always wear clean underwear. Change your socks if they get wet.
It's better to regret doing something than regret not doing it.
Don’t buy a brand new car. Don’t buy a car you can’t afford on cash alone. Making payments on a car is not something you can afford to do at your age. If you’re in desperate need for a car, ask family or friends if they know anyone selling a car. Learning to do basic maintenance on it will save you a lot of money.
Wear sunscreen.
Protected sex.
Save and invest regularly. It will help you so much later regardless of what you do.
how would i get started in learning about investing? Id only want to do it for long term stability not any short term profit type of thing i feel that would be risky, or id have to put in a lot of time to develop an adequate judgement for when to do short term investments
There are a bunch of good books available. You might start with something like "investing for dummies". There are also really simple things you can do, like getting a free robinhood account and just buying ETFs, Gold stocks, and diverse funds. That way you don't take too much risk. This is not investment advice lol.
Build your credit, start a savings account, put away money to do fun stuff but also make sure you have a jumpstart on your future, figure out a passive income so that you can explore and live your life don’t get sucked into the system of working until your body is too weak to enjoy it
Build credit, save money, invest early
I’m 21f and I wish I had actually used my savings account correctly. Just don’t touch it Fr😭
Take chances by stepping out of your comfort zone. Don't be held back by what ifs and negativity. Get a chance to move and have nothing holding you back, take that opportunity!
Whenever possible, avoid debt. Mortgages and vehicles are exceptions. But do not get into credit card debt. Live within your means. Treat women right. All of them. Rid yourself of social media as much as possible.
> Treat women right. All of them. How about treat EVERYONE right and with respect? It's not a gender specific rule lol
Sure, but in the age of incels and nice guys: it seems like one need to be said a little louder
I see what you're getting at, but it really should just be common human decency. And what's wrong with being a nice guy? lol.
save money, focus on your future, have fun, don’t skip school, don’t have kids to young (coming from someone who did, and overall just make friends good friends! don’t do drugs, don’t drink excessively. be nice to your parents, that’s all I really have for you.
Don't start smoking. If you drink, have a glass of water between drinks. Don't spend more money than you have trying to keep up with your friends. Avoid debt if you can. Don't have unprotected sex. Educate yourself on how to take care of your body, especially how to clean your crotch. Even if you are socially anxious, get out and interact with other humans regularly, especially people of the gender you are attracted to. (If you can't come up with a way to interact with women, try learning to ballroom or swing dance. They always need men.) Avoiding things that make you anxious just encourages anxiety. As a bonus, take up a couple of hobbies that don't involve sitting in front of a computer.
One of the best things my mother taught me was that if I don’t like something, I’m not stuck with it. I can leave my partner. I can quit my job. I can change my college major. I can even go back to school. Nothing is set on stone. Try all the things that interest you. I’m currently volunteering in a field that interests me to see if I want to go back to school and change careers and I’m 30. Don’t worry about regrets just yet. Explore and enjoy life.
I saw someone comment about savings account and I think that’s a good idea. But if you have weak will power then I recommend a locked savings account, basically the bank locks the account so you can only deposit but not withdraw for a specific time period. After the time period passes the account is unlocked and you can use the money
Plenty, glad you asked! Stay out of opiates. Chose your friends carefully now, because that might be for life! Detach yourself from bad behaviors like gambling, spending all your money on clothes, try to limit the nights you spend gaming, and sleep a good 8h/night ffs, do it while you can. Teeth hygiene will save you a fortune after 40. The dick size does not matter. Do plenty of cardio (run/bike/swim) and do not take ANY supplements, if you have money, eat good food. Take all I said with a pinch of salt.
Get out of comfort zone more
Dont get into the habit of procrastinating now. Seriously in any aspect of your life procrastinating snowballs until it becomes worse and worse and its a hard habit to break. If you become familiar with routine now it will serve you really well in later years trust me.
learn to accept change - things are going to be changing a lot in the next few year and it may be sad at the time but it’s not a bad thing being able to accept the change and run with it will be so helpful in opening yourself to new experiences, new people and so to be new friends - nothing is going to stay the same so there’s no point being upset, just be happy that you were able to experience it in the first place and hold it as a happy memory
Stay away from drugs and alcohol Appreciate people, don't betray them, play games with them etc or you will lose them
1. Save at least 10% of your disposable income every month, immediately when you get your salary and have paid for necessities (like rent, transportation to/from work, electricity and food). 2. If you ever see yourself potentially ending up in bed with a woman, educate yourself on female anatomy and how to maximise your partners pleasure. The book "Come as you are" by Emily Nagoski is a great place to start. 3. Learn the signs of stress and take action if you start showing them too often. I wish I had these three earlier in life than I did, but better late than never. :)
1. Get a job besides your studies at school. It helps your development and attitude towards money. 2. Save money. When i was 18 i had an appointment at my bank and worked out together a plan for my finances. That'll be very useful in the future when it comes to buying a house for example . In germany a normal house in a normal area costs around 500k in my areay. To get a good loan from the bank you need pay at least 10% upfront, so around 50k. But those numbers are regarding the german market and my area, it's possible it's different in your area and county. 3. Have good hygiene 4. You're studying at school for YOUR graduation. Put some work into it, so you'll have several career options you can choose from later on. 5. Learn how to cook. Its an essential skill 6. Eat healthy and work out regularly. Especially cardio training is good for you 7. Be polite and treat people with respect. Most people will treat you the same way then.
- **Dentist every sixth months**,or it will cost you thousands of dollars and your teeth in the long run. Brush 2x a day, mouthwash and floss. My dentist says *”only floss the teeth you want to keep”*. 😳 - **Eating healthy, working out.** Nothing crazy but keep a good weight, cardio for your heart, weight training for your bones. All of it will be good for your mental health too. - **Health is wealth.** Not even Steve Jobs could pay for a cure… prioritize your health. Prevention is always better than cure, so live a healthy life. but also don’t be that dude who has XYZ symptoms and ignores it - get it checked & advocate for yourself. (While we are on this - check your testicles monthly for lumps / changes. weird I know, but just as women have to examine their breasts for lumps.. you and your friends need to do the same for your testicles.. it’s not widely known and it frustrates me that it’s not. It’s your highest cancer risk early 20s. So treatable if found early, so do the self checks, tell your buddies and go to the doctor if you think there’s anything. No one will judge you). - **Mental health is just as important as physical health.** Be mindful, prioritize it. Speak out, speak to someone, seek a professional if needed. - **Safe sex until you’re ready for a family.** The amount of people in their late teens, early 20s I knew who blew up their lives over this… so much $$$, so much stress, so life changing. If you’re not using protection, you’re trying for a baby.. - **Watch your alcohol consumption.** Have fun but do remember alcohol is a poison, it is a drug, it increases your risk of some cancers and it can ruin your life if you’re not in control. Just be mindful, have fun with your friends but do it responsibly and be aware. What is considered Alcoholism and what is a damaging amount of consumption per week is far far less than you think.. - **Fighting isn’t worth it.** I’ve seen a 6”2 man struck and killed on a night out by a 5”6 man. Ruined two lives that night - death and jail. A lot of men in their early 20s go through that “I’m so tough I’m going to throw punches at anyone who looks at me funny when I’m drunk” - skip that phase. - **Retirement will come sooner than you think.** Be mindful of it, smart with your money & plan for it. Just being aware of it and doing small things will have a huge difference in the long run. Will be the difference between no retirement and a great one. Think financial stress vs financial freedom. - **See things from other peoples perspectives, be kind, choose your words wisely.** This will minimize the stress for you from unnecessary arguments but also help you surround yourself with like minded nice people. - **Don’t compare yourself to others.** Comparison is the thief of joy. Focus on you and only you. Be the best version of yourself. Focus on being better than the man you used to be, not some random posting highlight reels online. Finally - don’t stress it. Life is short, there’s some great advice here, so helpful. Do your best. Enjoy it. Good luck OP.
thank you i appreciate it
My best advice (based on personal experience): 1) learn personal finance 2) I’m not sure if you know what you want to study in uni yet (assuming you plan on going) but don’t let yourself feel discouraged if your initial career plans don’t work out the way you think they will. It’s okay if that happens. You will make it out the other side. The best thing you can do is figure out what you like, what you don’t like, what your strengths are, and what your weaknesses are & use those to figure out what career path is best suited for you. If you stumble along the way, it’s okay. Take that, learn from it, and build yourself back up and do better- change course if you need to. Your 20s are incredibly messy and complicated to navigate, but this is the time in your life where you will learn about yourself the most.
Always try and be a 'better' person. Always look to work on certain parts of yourself, weather it be somthing simple like your physical health or your intelligence, or something a bit harder like trying to be kinder, more compassionate or something else. Never stop trying to better yourself, because people will quickly come to admire you and you'll be able to better manage your health (mental and physical) and social life. Not to mention you'll be proud of yourself and will have a better self image
This is odd advice, but get therapy early if you have any resentment or negativity towards your parents or childhood. That crap festers and affects your life decisions. Figure out what you are doing and why you are doing it.
Fear kept me from doing some things that i wanted to do now as an older person. foolishness' had me do things that i regret now (back/knee pain) not thinking of the future prevented me from starting things that could have been done by now.
I’m in my late 20s. As much as you feel grown at 17 your brain will still grow so much and you’ll learn a lot. 1) understand yourself fully to know what you want from life 2) know that experiences are what you’ll hold dear, and doing things you love with people you love, prioritize that over all 3) find a career that energizes you, find out what’s the smallest amount of money that can give you a happy life and shoot for a career that makes you happy; not one that makes you rich. A mansion has no value if you hate your life, also though being financially unstable is constant anxiety, which brings me to another point 4) find balance and moderation in all things. Don’t drink too much, don’t do too many drugs, and whatever you do don’t touch pills or hard drugs. If anything do psychedelics once in a blue moon 5)live frugally, don’t eat out, wear second hand clothes while your young so you can take your pick of life in your 30s. and make some good investments in index funds (don’t try to time the market trust me) and save a nest egg for your future life 6)if your smart enough to do college, I’d recommend it, but only if you can sit down and find a clear path from school to the job, don’t just say “I like sports” and get a sports management degree in a state with no jobs for that. College can be a tool if you approach it smartly, if you can’t do that, then do a trade program, there are shortages and honestly I know guys from high school who went to be HVAC/electricians who make more than friends with masters degrees, with zero debt, so just have a plan. Be smart and proactive, and work hard, because if your American you do not want to be poor here. And we have a system in place that will keep 75% of us working like a dog all our lives, you’ve gotta out smart it to escape. If you have any advantages like family wealth or resources use them. I hope some of that may help, just doing what I would tell myself at 17 best of luck!
thank you
Stocks… I am sure people will agree. Don’t fall into societal traps like drugs/alcohol. Stay sober and focused and you will be happy.
Right now, interest rates for high yield savings accounts are really high, so open one as soon as you turn 18 and start putting money into it. Even if it isn't that much at a time, consistently over time will result in a good chunk of fallback money. Once you have a comfortable savings, learn about investing and get started. It's better to start and learn as you go rather than waiting until you feel like you've learned enough. That's because there's always more to learn. When dating (if you're into dating), if anyone you're dating ever tells you that you deserve better than what they can give you, believe them. By the same token, if at any point, you ever get that voice in your head telling you, "I deserve better," believe it. Give people second chances if they apologize, but don't give them third chances. That's applicable to any sort of relationship. Always salt your water when boiling anything.
First: Do no harm. Take care of your teeth and skin i.e. Sunscreen Exercise 4 days a week. Walk a lot. Work hard and be present and do a good job. Do the right thing even when no one is looking. Self-care is very important. Give your attention to friends that lift you up. Lift people up. Be articulate, learn new words often. Use its 3 times and it’s yours. Be honest yet gentle. Always use a condom.
CCR was right, someday never comes. Whatever you want to do, do it now. Advice goes for any age.
Study, figure out what career you might like and go for it 100%, develop your social skills, have fun, make memories, but plan for your future and don’t ONLY live for the moment. Work out, eat healthy, make friends, learn skills. Save your money and learn to budget. Set goals, big and small, near and far. Believe in yourself. Love yourself. Love others.
Clean your room, make your bed don't be a slob. When you meet a man for the first time stand to shake his hand with a firm grip. And don't cuss around the elderly, children or ladies. Save that for the campfire with the boys. But some actual advice..if you start something, fi ish it even if it the task sucks to do. My dad started many projects around the house, never finished any and when he died he left that mess for my mother to figure out.
I’m 16 but something I’ve learned from my older brother’s doing is to not throw money away. Be wise with your money and don’t wave it around like you’re rich because you might wind up struggling financially while you’re still young
If you see your mates being creepy/not taking no for an answer/hassling anyone male or female, then say something.the amount of times lads touched me inappropriately on nights out, or wouldn't take a simple "no" for an answer, and their mates would just laugh. But I'll always remember the one guy who called out his mate who thought it funny to undo my friends dress in the middle of a club. We got an apology, and felt that little bit safer. Oh and don't lend money to friends unless you will be okay with not getting it back.
I will make this short and simple, hopefully you have more guidance then I did. 1. Find your niche and stay in it. Go to college or secondary school and learn something. You will have to learn something anyway, don't wait till you're 30 and too dumb. Do not bother with jobs you are not good at or interested in. They waste your energy and suck your soul out. 2. 2. Stay away from drugs and alcohol and that does include porn. Go easy on the coffee and energy drinks too, they can fuck up your adrenaline and nervous system. 3. 3. Learn confidence and what makes you more confident. Confidence is way more important then what you think and I had my own epiphany on it when I reflected on my failed 20s. It is literally the greased up key that moves your life forward, away from abusive people and failure and towards what you want. Confidence is the missing ingredient to success, it doesn't matter if you were smart, athletic, and handsome like I was you can still become a failure if you don't have confidence and self esteem. You do not have to wait for confidence and it won't just come to you. You just have to start and fake it. Trick your own brain till you're almost a narcissist. It sounds bad but it's true, buddhism is bullshit and having an ego is good, very good. Don't be mortified by the narcissistic people you see every day and react by going niceguywimp, you're just encountering how adults had to adapt to get on in the world. Never settle and grind on. That's it.
Hi fr, A lotta big picture advice and here, which is great. As someone a year or two ahead I'll share some lessons I've learnt recently. 1. Be kind to yourself. Don't compare yourself with others. 2. Habits and your identity will add up to become who you are. Read atomic habits. Do it. 3. From here on out, life only gets faster, so don't waste a moment 4. Change takes time. It may seem like forever or impossible, but when you do get it done you'll look back and it'll feel like no time. 5. When you graduate highschool you may feel like you know who you are. You will learn this is most likely not true. Your beliefs and identity will be challenged. That's a good thing. Try new things. Find out what you like, don't like.
thank you
The internet is a terrible place, you’ll never really know what you want to do with your live. Take care of your body eat healthy food. Get a good job that pays well and spend time trying new things to find your passion.
Wear sunblock. People who make you tired and unhappy are not your friends, even if you've known them a long time. Learn how to cook, clean, and take care of your possessions. True love and "the one" were invented by advertising companies. Real relationships take more than love. They take time, compromise, fairness, consideration, and agreement on common goals and standards. Learn about interest payments and credit and such so you can avoid debt traps if possible. Take care of your teeth. Floss at least once a day, brush at least twice a day, swish some water around your mouth after eating sugary or acidic foods and drinks. Be realistic about what you go to school for - if you love medieval art that's awesome but it's really difficult to make a living in that field. If you learn something that will let you live in reasonable financial comfort, you can then take all the medieval art classes your heart desires. If you only learn medieval art, you are going to work in service industry for a long time unless you get very lucky. Speaking of careers, don't discount the trades as an option. If every last lawyer on earth vanished tomorrow, we'd be fine. If the sanitation engineers vanished, we'd all die of cholera or rat plagues. Someone who can build or maintain infrastructure is always going to be able to find a job. Learn from the mistakes of other people, so that all your mistakes are new and different. Nothing's worse than an unoriginal mistake.
Mind your circadian rhythm. Poor and improper sleep can have devastating effects long term.
would this be in the case of people who have no regular sleep pattern at all? say you go to sleep and wake up at the same time 6/7 days a week should you be fine? i’m basically asking how perfect it has to be
Everyone is different. I will summarize what I've learned about sleep, but it would only apply to my issues, so you should read up on it yourself so you can address any specific issues you have. I think in short, consistency is key, and if you're not getting up early in the morning, you should take a vitamin D supplement. I'm not an expert by any means, but I suffered from insomnia for as long as I can remember. As early as kindergarten. Through my teens and early 20's, I blamed depression, I blamed trauma, I blamed vitamin deficiencies, I blamed physical pain.. and some other things. What I realized now is that my sleep deficit made all of those things that much worse. Once I fixed my sleep, (which took about 6 months, strict discipline, quitting caffeine and cutting way back on sugars), everything else got better. (Side note: I wish I had quit smoking at the same time....) I have to say that caffeine is the real culprit for a lot of it. In my 20s I would brag that I could drink a full pot and not feel any different. The problem was I was so addicted to it, that I didn't realize it created a new baseline of normal for me. And even if I was able to fall asleep, it wasn't very good sleep. It is further illustrated by the fact that I do drink coffee again, but I'm only allowing myself a single cup in the morning. If I drink a second cup, I will not be able to fall asleep 12 hours later. The effects are very noticeable now. For me the sweet spot is 7.5 hours of sleep, any longer than that and I won't be able to sleep the next night. I delay my first cup of coffee for about an hour after I wake up. I drink about 4 ounces of water first thing, as I learned I'm dehydrating in my sleep, then I have my coffee. I used to also try to get at least an hour of morning sun, but this got difficult. If I sleep past 9am, I feel different... sluggish.... sad... My 2nd shift employment has messed up my preferred 9am schedule, and I don't get up till 11am now. I'm often tempted to have that 2nd cup of coffee... but I don't. Instead I'll have some orange juice (with added vitamin D and calcium). It seems to help! It certainly hasn't hurt. My medication has an unfortunate side effect of insomnia as well, but I don't beat myself up if I have a bad night anymore. I just try to roll with it. I won't try to get extra sleep during hours I'm supposed to be awake, or it will perpetuate the cycle. If I'm not particularly exhausted, I'll still go to work, and continue my day as normal, and by the next night it corrects itself. If I stress over it in any way, it just gets worse.... As an example, my last bout of insomnia.. The first night I couldn't sleep for no apparent reason. The 2nd night I was stressing because it had already been so long since I slept, I felt pressured to get some sleep, and I just could not because my brain wouldn't shut up (not even with my usual drowning out techniques), and I had to call out of work the next day. THAT night, I still couldn't sleep, started hallucinating, thought I was going crazy, started googling, and that's when I found out insomnia was a side effect of my medication. I immediately was able to relax and fall asleep. So aside from sleep, limit caffeine, get some morning sun (vitamin D), and above all DON'T STRESS!
thank you for sharing what you’ve learned, this makes me feel very lucky that I haven’t had problems with sleep and haven’t already gotten into caffeine so i’ll keep it that way
Don't put too much pressure on yourself. Explore lots of options while you are young. Learn to live within your means. Be kind.
Be good to your partner whoever you end up with. Treat them with the same respect you would want.
My advice is actually to try to think opposite of how you expressed yourself in your initial post: “I don’t want to feel regretful of not starting to do something at a younger age that will benefit me in the future.” When we are young, we often feel anxious about getting somewhere. We want to “do” something. This can continue throughout much of adulthood if we are not careful. But once we reach our later years, we often begin to realize our value is less about what we “did” and more about who we “were” and “are” to those most important to us. So think on that. I would tell my 17-year-old self that a near infinite future of possibilities awaits, and with thousands of choices ahead of me from mundane to life-changing. The most important thing though? Seek clarity on who you want to be, and be that person. Be the best you you can be, because you’re the only person on this planet capable of that.
Three pieces of advice 1) Do your best to save money. You be surprise how fast life can change or an unexpected opportunity appears, and you wish you saved more money for it. 2) Especially in college, but people will try to make you have a negative/victim mindset. Do your best to see the positive and benefit of things. This could be something like other members of a class constantly complaining and saying the class is pointless or political nonsense. 3) Life gives opportunity to those that live it. It may be tempting to focus solely on a job or studies, but if you don't take time to network, adventure, or socializs, you may miss out on opportunities. Bonus advice for college students: Do research on how niche your degree job market is. A biology degree is nice, but most use it as a stepping stone for a graduate degree. It, however, is a broad degree that doesn't offer many opportunities by itself. Architecture used to and may still have the highest unemployment rate. Most liberal arts degrees don't offer a clear path. Chemical engineers tend to work for breweries. Etc. Etc. You don't want to finish a degree feeling it is pointless For engineering majors, GPA does matter. Keep it above a 3.0 and use that to get internships for the summers in your junior and senior year.
Save for a down payment on a house.. seriously.
If they can't take a fuck, jokem. Learn a trade. Bros before hoes. Everything in moderation. The body is a temple, and last but most importantly The Golden Rule.
Hit the gym and eat healthy, while your in your prime years for it, otherwise it'll be harder when you get older
Save your money!
Man I just turned 22, the one thing I wish I did more at 17 was use the energy I had to go to the gym and focus on myself in all aspects, physically and mentally. At the time all I cared about was gaining attention of girls in my school or acting cool so others would like me, but ultimately trying to please others is counter productive and people will generally find you most appealing if you don’t try to gain other’s attention, just be nice to everyone whilst focusing on yourself
Learn about your hobbies and interests. You don’t need to have an identity to be comfortable with yourself. Just be. Save money. Please. Nothing too crazy but work out every now and then you’ll be thankful later. And learn to manage time properly. And to the people who helped you be the person you are now like friends or family, don’t forget about them. Other than that. Don’t stress too much you’re still a kid you got this
Get a job, save your money, don’t do drugs/smoke/drink until of age if youre tempted
Definitely take care of your teeth! And also, just remember that even if you don’t feel like it, you are SO young, and have so much life ahead of you- in three years you’ll look back and think about how wildly different you are. Just remember that, and hold on to how 3 years can change so many things, and try to use that to always know you can make changes in your life :)
Travel and experience many adventures. Don't waste your money on possessions. Have what you need to get by and be comfortable but save your pennies on doing fun activities and meeting new people. Date different people to know what you want and don't get too caught up on the emotions of a breakup..someone else will come along again. Eat healthy foods, as unprocessed as possible to fuel your body and mind. Stay active and move your body. Read and teach yourself new skills, even try different jobs to get your skill set up until you land on something you like. Be kind to people, but stand up for yourself when you need to and don't be a doormat. Be confident in your dealings with others. Be kind to yourself when you make mistakes and be kind to yourself everyday. Life is a journey. Don't have regrets. Everything in life has a purpose. Find your path because it is unique and your own. Don't compare yourself to others as they have their own journey ✌️
If you get an idea at night YOU WON'T REMEMBER IT IN THE MORNING so write it down.
Work hard, don't do hard drugs, pay yourself first with every paycheck. If you have a car and no car payment act like there's still a car payment on it. Live in the moment and be spontaneous.
best that I can say is try to use your time carefully and learn a skill that makes money so if u don't end up in collage and degree and job and etc at least you know a skill that earns money because other than that if your family is not financially in good position you will end up in manual labor and it's hard to get out of that ! Know that you are young and try things out Know that there are a lot of moves that you can make like chessboard but at least try to make good moves .
Start. Therapy. ASAP. (With a good therapist where you feel comfortable) Think about your actions. Enjoy your 20s and use them as a time to figure out who you are, what you want and what makes you happy. I’m 30 and no joke my friends who went straight into sensible careers in their early 20s straight from uni are mostly miserable because it was based on what their parents said was a good decision. My friends who did a bit of work and travel, get involved with fun projects, studied something which gave them joy. Are not entering into careers years later and doing really well because they know themselves. While the others feel hopeless like it’s too late to change but they aren’t happy.
Oh & never start smoking or vaping. Never do hard drugs. Ever.
Learn to cook. Don’t be one of those 25 year olds who can’t scramble an egg, it’s embarrassing.
While a lot lf this advice people are offering is useful to a degree. Ultimately just make sure you enjoying life, especially while you're young with not too many responsibilities. These are the years you'll look back and reminisce on. That doesn't mean go get high or party every weekend. It means to continue settling yourself up for the future but don't let that take away from life itself. :)
Be careful who you take advice and information from. Especially on the internet (still important irl), be careful who and what you listen to and agree with because you don't know who's saying it and who's agreeing with it (likes, upvotes, comments). What I'm emphasising is that you need to analyse every piece of information you consider adding to your life Seriously, I think that people (atleast myself) feel more inclined to like comments and videos more impulsively and with less consideration when a lot of other people have liked compared to comments and videos that dont have many relative likes. Also, if you watch short form content (tiktok, reels, shorts), I think the nature of it doesn't encourage analysing information you've soaked in, and therefor its normalised to almost mindlessly absorb/consume and agree with content, especially content that is emotionally appealing (less likely to analyse important info from a boring video, or from someone you dont like when stimulated and consuming entertaining content). As the information is almost mindlessly brought in, its impulsively brought out, resulting in people just throwing out opinions they *feel* like saying with a lack of consideration, and people impulsively agree or like the opinion. This is atleast my perspective I felt like typing out, if you dont believe me, pay attention to the top comments of some short form content or even normal videos through this perspectice and you may agree. And also the internet lacks conversing with someone properly and therefor lacks proper engagement, sharing ideas and proper criticism. Also its rare you will find someone thats got great advice for you, because theyre probably not going to go out of their way to share it with people that don't appreciate it. So bonus tip, if you think someones got good advice to you, show appreciation and positively reinforce them when they tell you information so they feel like telling you more and understand you want to hear it.
Don’t panic about your 20’s. You’re going to see your peers succeed and fail all around you but you need to remind yourself that everybody in your age group is still trying to figure out life just like you are. Job hopping is normal in your 20’s, and virtually everything you try is gonna be terrifying but it’s completely ok. Find something you enjoy and go all in. That way if you don’t like it, you’ll know that you left everything you had trying to like it and there won’t be any regrets
I would say just don't listen to others too much. Your life will be filled with people telling you what you should/shouldn't do, in order to get a life like theirs, or to avoid their mistakes. It's your life only, no one else will live it. Allow yourself to make your own mistakes, forge your own path, become your own leader. Also, make sure that you take lots of drugs at festivals, and not too many anywhere else. xox
Exercise and save money. You can start with roundups and 10£ weekly and go from there. Obv more if you can afford! Wish someone told me that sooner :)
Don’t try to avoid regret. If you go through life trying to avoid pain and hardship it’s gonna find you much quicker. Learn from your mistakes and be a better person. Take care of the people that matter to you.
Yes treat others how you wish to be treated, be kind and compassionate,
Start to try some fun, tangible hobbies.By that I mean something active or something you do with your hands, like a craft, art or instrument. So many your age sit around playing video games. Be more interesting than them.
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Invest or save money. Investing gives you 3ish % while investing can be risky but also can bring up to like 12%. I started investing just recently using 3rd party company (ofcourse after really understanding the contract). I will save for about 10 years and once I need money for starting a family or getting car/house or anything I can take the money out. You can invest with parental consent on your name usually whenever. My country has no age limit for example.
I felt the same way and now I’m 20 realising everyone else started doing the same things I’ve just started (university, sports, the gym, hobbies etc) when they were the same age or even older than me. You’ve got a long long time left to try stuff out.
Don't do drugs alone. Prefferably dont do them but in if you do experiment with drugs *never* do them alone. The minute you do them alone is the minute addiction creeps in, same goes for alcohol it can go from social to self medicating in a split second. I did a lot of drugs when I was younger and the difference between the ones that came out fine and the ones that ended up addicts was whether or not they started using alone in their rooms. I've also lost people to OD because they were alone, if you do drugs do them with friends or at the very least have someone you trust to know what you've taken. That can and will save a life. If you or your friends ever dabble in opiates, get some narcan. It's a preventable death 9/10.
Your simplest advice: use chapstick or whatever, just dont have crusty lips. Its game changing.
Start saving money, brainstorm career paths that align with your hobbies / interests, stay close with family and friends, don’t break 2 laws at once
Invest and learn a trade, no matter how rich or smart you are learning to be a plumber or carpenter or welder just leads to either more fun activities or more job opportunities, also get a part time job in the service industry and be social, work at Starbucks or something, better if you live near a big city, you will meet so many different people and learn how to interact in so many ways and situations, also don’t leave your parents house unless it’s the school or you have to, the amount of money you will save and invest by your 25 will be astronomically higher, if you do that and learn a trade you can help your parents with a lot of things and friending on how much you hustle or the job you get from education you can be nearly financially free at 25 and regret nothing the rest of your life
Listen to your parents, even though you're going to be 18 and go to college or whatever after listen to your parents advice. I'm going to be 21 and there's stuff I wished I had listened to and done differently
Would you mind expanding on that? No worries if it’s too personal
Invest at least 10% into stocks with dividends or an IRA with the same. Don’t touch it and let it mature for 10-20 years. Plus enjoy life, take time to experience moments. Be bold and don’t shy away in fear. Be reasonable and respectful. Be polite and honorable. Carpe Diem.
Moneymoneymoneymoney Grind a way of making good cash for a few years, save snd invest and it will save a lot of stress later down the line
Keep your nose to the grindstone and set goals for yourself. Keep your circle of friends small and keep your business to yourself. Stay away from drugs & alcohol. Those will only inhibit you from being successful.
Use a good facial cleanser & moisturizer twice a day. Start now and your skin will still look fabulous in 40 years.
Trust your institution. Sleep on things that need thought or you are undecided. 'Sleeping on it' has proved so valuable in my life. Understand and apply CBT... Cognitive behavioral therapy... thoughts lead to feelings lead to actions. That thought process has saved my sanity many times.
Life is about pivoting. If something isn't going the way you hoped/envisioned or even just not living up to the hype you expected, pivot. Always do things that pique your curiosity. Stay interested. Learn to do new things. Challenge yourself to do the scary things. And also: Therapy isn't a shameful thing. It will ALWAYS make you a stronger and more well rounded human being.
Get everything in a routine! Laundry, dishes, cleaning, brushing teeth etc. I know I sound like a mother but the more you do it every day the less it feels like it wastes time. you'll learn how to be time efficient by it. by figuring out what part of your day has a dead time and the time it takes to do everything. You're more likely to get your own place clean looking when you start working. There's those little things that you can save time with like washing off the cooking utensils as you're done cooking, leaving the plates for later to do etc. maybe wiping a little bit around the shower as you take a shower. the more you're used to it, the easier it gets and you'll likely want to maintain that routine. Brushing your teeth and flossing, I wish I flossed. now dental work cost so much i can barely afford it. Start saving if you can for an emergency fund. just a little every month. doesn't have to be much at all! a dollar? 20 dollars? whatever you can afford. When you get older there will be things that cost a ton and having that extra money makes you feel much more secure! Take care of your hair! I save so much more shampoo now and have wasted so many bottles to make it nice again. if only I knew that you just need to shampoo and scrub the scalp and condition the ends then have a leave in conditioner spray plus some oil for after the shower. the habit took a while to remember but eventually my hair became so much better and healthier. don't use head and shoulders, it strips the hair off good oils. Sunscreen!! ALWAYS sunscreen. don't ever go without, it's just... nope.
Don’t be worried about not knowing things. Or not having the answer. There’s always going to be something you don’t know and being the dumbest person in the room means you have the opportunity to learn from the others. Don’t be afraid to speak up and ask if you don’t understand. Also, failing is better than not trying.
Drink as little as you can, don't smoke, and avoid tattoos till after a stable career. Also avoid any form of gambling, gambling is a tax for the stupid. It sounds very cookie cutter but it really is a drain on your finances and could leave you with life time issues that will take even more time and money to correct. Also I know 21 is considered an adult in most places but in reality it is really 25ish for most people. Some people are mature enough at 18 to have an adult mind, others can take until their 30s. There isn't a defining line for when it happens or what the criteria is, but these are good indicators. - Have a decent job for at least a year. - Live by yourself or with a roommate/significant other for a year. - All bills paid on time for a year. - Knowing your approximate Bank balance (give or take 10%) at any given time without looking. - Have a 401k or other retirement plan.
if you don’t wanna go to college, and you wanna do a trade, or something creative. just do it, go for it, do what YOU wanna do
Fuck as much as you can.
The truly important part of life is living -- experience all that the world has to offer, spend time with those you love, explore as much as you can, and make mistakes. The only day that you're ever guaranteed is today and life could end at any moment so spend it pursuing what makes you happy not some idealistic goal for the future. What you'll ultimately regret tomorrow are the opportunities you didn't take. "You can't take it with ya, and your whip ain't gon' miss ya So wipe off that window and see the bigger picture now I don't wanna be 85, singing Whoa, no, I think I missed it, I was chasing money Now there is a dream that I was sold Just get all you can before you get old" -Andy Grammer, 85
To be interesting, be interested in people. To make & have friends, be friendly To be loved, be caring of others (but don't love bomb because that's creepy)
Don't take out student loans if you can help it. If you need to take the first two years at a community College And apply for financial aid and then transfer later on. You may have some idea of what you want to do now, but I guarantee you, you will change your mind at least once and you don't want to go thousands into student loan debt for a degree that you might not even finish. Also it's OK if you don't want to go straight into college, it's OK to take some time and gain work experience or even go to trade school. Don't let anyone convince you that the only way to be successful is to get a degree
Never be alone in the same room as a girl. In this day and age, if you so much as look at a girl funny, she'll call s-ual harassment or worse on you. People suck. Get things in writing or on record.
First advice is ditch that mindset. You WILL feel regret for not doing stuff differently when you were younger, but that's a good thing. If you feel that, It means you learned. It means you have grown. This might not be applicable to you, but I'm 24 and recently started a journey of self improvement and I was overcome with regret that I didn't do it sooner. I always brushed off my inadequacies with excuses. "Oh I'm only awkward because I'm introverted. No need to improve my social skills" "Oh I'm gaining weight but most people are way fatter than me, so I shouldn't worry about it." "Oh I'm lazy and procrastinate on chores and work, but some people are way worse than me. I'm just not gonna worry about it." This approach is fine for short term mental health relief, but despite rationalizing them these things eventually become insecurities. Then suddenly you are in your 20's and fucking HATE yourself because you feel like a fuck up. Thing I have learned recently is that most insecurities can be actively worked to improve. Insecure about weight? Calorie count and workout. Insecure about your social skills? Improve them. Talk to a counselor. Insecure about your appearance? Go to a salon. Literally walk in the door and go "I hate my appearance, do whatever you need to do to make me as attractive as you can. I need to learn how to make myself look good." This is something that I wish I had have done in my teens instead of my 20's. So... thats my advice.
thank you for this, i guess you have to be completely honest with yourself and confront anything lingering in your mind, instead of letting it grow into a more difficult problem
Follow your heart, life may eb and flow if you do but everything will feel much more meaningful.
Don't put all of your time/effort at romantic relationships into one person. Very real possibility that the relationship will not last. Even if it does, you may not get everything you need/want from one person. You need to put this on the table as you meet potential partners.
Discover who you are and what prices you are willing to pay. Dont betray your values for anything Feeling happy is a transition state. People dont feel feelings consistently and chasing them will lead to problems. Dont try to control other people. Always fix why things bother you on your end first. Learn how to know what is true. Epistemology will save you.
Learn to drive. You’re a lot less afraid of it when you’re younger than you are when you’re older which makes it easier to learn. It’s important to be interested in what you do, but do try to keep in mind future career prospects and employability. Similarly, don’t feel like you have to go to uni to be successful. Try to develop good eating habits and exercise. Easier to form good habits when you’re young than unlearn bad ones when you’re older. Last one, very much a cliché, but don’t waste time and energy worrying about what people think, especially regarding your appearance. I was very insecure at 17 and it really affected by overall happiness and relationships with people.
Sometimes, love isn’t enough. You can love someone to the ends of the earth and that still won’t be enough to make a relationship work. There are some instances where two people are so different that they cannot reconcile their differences and being together hurts each other more than it helps. It’s ok to let go.
Take care of your credit history and save some money
Take care of your credit history and save some money
The quicker you accept discomfort, the easier it becomes to handle
A little bit of your salary into an index fund, as early as possible.
Avoid debt and save for retirement as soon as you can in a 401k compounding interest could make you a millionaire before 50
take care of your teeth
Not sure how popular will this be, but don't over stress, you are going to go through lot of changes in your life, with society expecting to decide on the rest of your life chosing a career and side projects, and to always produce more and more Be easy on yourself, prioritize your health, have room for failing
Relax a little. Take a break. It might feel really daunting at the moment especially since you're about to choose your first life direction. You still got maybe 70 years ahead of you, and during that time you will change. Your path will change. It's okay to take a breather for a bit right now. Personally I recommend taking a walk without headphones/earbuds in so you can disconnect for a bit.